Original subtitles

HERE AT BARE, DR. TROY, WE OFFER OUR CLIENTS

A WIDE RANGE OF FULL-BODY TREATMENTS.

ISN'T THAT FUNNY?

I'VE FOUND MYSELF SAYING THE SAME THING ON OCCASION.

OR...I COULD ARRANGE TO WORK ON

A SPECIFIC AREA OF YOUR BODY,

IF THAT'S WHAT YOU'D LIKE.

HEY, HONEY.

DON'T YOU JUST LOVE THIS PLACE?

YES. I WAS JUST GOING OVER MY OPTIONS.

Kimber: ALREADY TOOK CARE OF THAT.

I CALLED AHEAD FOR THE DUAL HUT STONE MASSAGES.

IT SHOULD BE UNDER TROY.

DUAL AS IN WE SHARE THE SAME ROOM?

IT'S OUR 3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY, HONEY.

I THOUGHT YOU'D WANNA BE TOGETHER.

I HAVE ANOTHER SURPRISE FOR YOU.

* HE'S SO FAR OUT *

* HE FITS RIGHT IN *

* HE'S SO FAR OUT *

* THAT HE FITS RIGHT IN *

* DUBBA DUBBA DUBBA DUBBA *

* DUBBA DUBBA BA BA *

* DUBBA DUBBA DUBBA DUBBA *

DUBBA DUBBA DUBBA BA BA *

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?

THEY WAXED IN YOUR INITIALS, SEE?

K.T.?

SWEETHEART, IT'S CHRISTIAN WITH A "C," NOT A "K."

REALLY?

HAS IT ALWAYS BEEN THAT WAY?

Merill: SO...

THIS MUST BE THE BETTER HALF.

I NEVER KNEW CHRISTIAN HAD SUCH TASTE.

MERILL BOBALIT, M.D.

IT'S A PLEASURE.

KIMBER HENRY. HELLO.

MERILL, YOU METRO-SEXUAL, YOU.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE, GETTING YOUR BACK WAXED?

WHO TOLD YOU?

BABY, I'M GONNA GO SEE IF THEY CAN FIX MY "K", OK?

OK.

[WHISTLES]

WOW.

I'M BETTIN' THAT ONE TASTES LIKE...

GOLDEN GRAHAMS.

I REALLY DO HATE TO SEE 2 BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE IN LOVE.

LOVE. PLEASE.

IF SHE WASN'T THE BEST SEX IN MY LIFE,

SHE'D BE LONG GONE BY NOW.

SHE'S JUST NOT BRIGHT ENOUGH TO FIGURE IT OUT.

GOOD IN BED AND NOT TOO BRIGHT?

OH, MY GOD. SHE'S MY DREAM WOMAN.

SHE SHOULD BE MINE.

SHE'S BEAUTIFUL, DOTING,

EVERYTHING A GUY SHOULD WANT.

BUT IF I WANTED TO DO THE HIGH MAINTENANCE THING,

I GOT A '66 FIAT.

WHEN ARE YOU GONNA DUMP HER?

MERILL, YOU TRYING TO MOVE IN

ON MY GIRLFRIEND?

WHEN THERE'S A TOWEL ON A CHAISE,

THAT MEANS ITS SPOKEN FOR.

[WHISTLES] UP!

JESUS.

AS I WAS SAYING...

KIMBER HENRY WOULD BE THE PERFECT MOTHER FOR MY CHILDREN.

MY DNA MIXED WITH HERS ALL BUT ASSURES A BLOND JEW.

WANNA MAKE A TRADE?

TRADE FOR WHAT?

FOR KIMBER.

YOU REMEMBER MONICA, RIGHT?

YOU MET HER AT MY HOUSE.

I'LL FIX YA UP WITH HER AND HER FRIEND.

A TWO-FOR-ONE. HOW 'BOUT IT?

YOU'RE OUTTA YOUR LEAGUE, MERILL.

YOU GOT NOTHING I WANT.

OH, YES, I DO.

MY CAR. REMEMBER?

YOU'RE TELLING ME

YOU'D TRADE YOUR LAMBORGHINI FOR KIMBER?

YOU'RE INSANE.

YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT.

SHE'LL BE BACK ON THE MARKET SOON ENOUGH.

I'LL JUST SCOOP HER UP THEN.

EXCUSE ME FOR TRYING TO FACILITATE

A PAINLESS BREAKUP FOR YOU.

YOU'RE HONESTLY PREPARED TO GIVE ME THE LAMBORGHINI.

YOU KNOW HOW I OPERATE, CHRISTIAN--

I SEE SOMETHING I LIKE, I GO FOR IT.

IT'S THE CURSE OF BEING RICH AND IMPATIENT.

EXCUSE ME.

DR. TROY...

YOUR GIRLFRIEND WANTED ME TO DOUBLE-CHECK WITH YOU...

THAT WAS A "C" AND NOT A "K," RIGHT?

MERILL, I THINK WE CAN WORK SOMETHING OUT.

* DA BUBBA DUBBA DUBBA DUBBA *

* BA BA BA BA BA *

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

* AHH *

* MAKE ME BEAUTIFUL *

* MAKE ME *

* A PERFECT SOUL *

* A PERFECT MIND *

* A PERFECT FACE *

* A PERFECT *

* LIFE *

ARE YOU SURE IT'S CALIBRATED RIGHT?

I KNOW. IT'S AN EVIL, EVIL DEVICE.

BUT WATCH HOW IT WORKS.

140.

YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?

IF SHE'S GONNA BE A REAL WOMAN,

SHE NEEDS TO START LYING ABOUT HER WEIGHT.

I'M ONLY TRYING TO BE HELPFUL.

I LIKE HER!

SOPHIA, I NEED YOUR SIGNATURE

ON THIS PATIENT CONSENT FORM.

I ALREADY SIGNED ONE OF THOSE, DR. McNAMARA,

AFTER YOU FIXED MY ADAM'S APPLE

AND BEFORE YOU DID MY BREASTS.

THE SEXUAL REASSIGNMENT SURGERY HAS MORE RISKS.

INFECTIONS ARE POSSIBLE.

ON AVERAGE, THERE'S A 15% CHANCE OF HEMORRHAGING,

WHICH CAN LEAD TO--

I COULD ACTUALLY DIE FROM THIS?

W...YES.

BY LAW, I HAVE TO HAVE YOU SIGN A FORM

SPECIFICALLY FOR THE SRS.

OK. SURE.

[SIGNING FORM]

DO YOU NEED

THE GENDER REASSIGNMENT SURGERY, SOPHIA?

CAN'T YOU JUST KEEP THE BREASTS

AND THE KIBBLES & BITS...

AND BE SATISFIED WITH THE KNOWLEDGE

THAT EMOTIONALLY AND SPIRITUALLY

YOU ARE MORE OF A WOMAN THAN MOST?

WELL...THAT TRADE-OFF WORKS

FOR MANY IN THE TRANSGENDER COMMUNITY,

BUT...I WANNA FEEL COMPLETE.

HONESTLY, LIZ, I'M MORE CONCERNED

ABOUT MY EXPANDING FAT ASS

THAN I AM ABOUT TURNING MY PENIS INTO A VAGINA.

GAINING A FEW POUNDS

BEFORE YOUR BOTTOM SURGERY IS NORMAL, SOPHIA.

BEING OFF THE ESTROGEN IS WHAT CAUSES IT.

NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

WHEN YOU'RE IN MY SITUATION,

THAT'S WHEN YOU NEED TO WORRY.

WHAT SITUATION IS THAT, LIZ?

40. SINGLE. PICKY.

LIZ, YOU'RE DATING AGAIN?

GOOD FOR YOU.

GOING TO BARS AND BEING REJECTED

IS NOT SOMETHING I CONSIDER DATING.

I'M THINKING ABOUT STARTING

AN EMPLOYEE DISCOUNT ON BOTOX...

NOT THAT YOU WOULD NEED IT, LIZ.

WELL, YOU'RE RIGHT, DR. McNAMARA.

SHE DOESN'T NEED IT.

TURN TO ME, LIZ.

AH...YOU GOT A BEAUTIFUL CANVAS.

YOU JUST NEED TO THROW SOME PAINT ON IT.

A LITTLE CONCEALER UNDER THE EYES,

A COUPLE OF SHADES OF FOUNDATION,

AND GUESS WHAT.

YOU'LL LOOK LIKE A 25-YEAR-OLD LIPSTICK LESBIAN.

YOU MUST KNOW A LOT ABOUT MAKEUP.

I'VE HAD TO CONCEAL A LOT IN MY LIFE.

ON EVERY LEVEL.

MY PLACE TONIGHT?

YOU BRING THE WINE AND...

I'LL PROVE TO YOU YOU DON'T NEED A SCALPEL

TO TURN BACK TIME.

YOU READY TO DO SOME HOMEWORK?

LET'S SEE...

SHOULD WE START WITH ADVANCED CALCULUS?

NO, I AGREE.

TOO BORING.

[MONITOR BEEPING]

FRENCH?

OK, SURE.

FRENCH IT IS.

UH, KARA JUST--OH.

MATT, I'M WITH A PATIENT.

YOU NEED TO KNOCK.

I-IT'S KARA. SHE MOVED.

MOVED?

TWITCHED.

THIS IS A GOOD SIGN.

LET ME FINISH MY EXAM, AND WE'LL TALK LATER.

SHIT.

YOU WEREN'T DOING ANYTHING OUT OF LINE, SEAN.

I WAS DUE FOR AN EXAM.

YOU WERE GIVING IT TO ME.

THAT'S NOT ALL WE WERE DOING.

WE CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE.

I AGREE.

I MEANT...HERE.

PHASE ONE.

TRUST.

HEY, BABY.

Kimber: YOU DIDN'T SAY YOU WERE BRINGING COMPANY.

Christian: AH, SORRY, SWEETHEART.

YOU REMEMBER MERILL, RIGHT?

HI.

HELLO.

THANK YOU.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

OH, UH...

WE'RE GONNA WATCH PAY-PER-VIEW TONIGHT.

IS THAT THE DRESS I HATE?

YOU NEVER SAID YOU HATED THIS DRESS.

IT MAKES YOU LOOK BOXY. WHY ARE YOU WEARING IT?

I, UH...

THOUGHT WE HAD PLANS TO GO TO THE CONGA ROOM TONIGHT?

SORRY, SWEETHEART. SLIPPED MY MIND.

I INVITED SOME FRIENDS OVER TO WATCH THE FIGHT.

YOU PROBABLY DON'T WANNA STICK AROUND FOR THAT.

I CAN'T FIGURE OUT THIS WHOLE DIRECT TV THING.

YOU SEE IF YOU CAN MAKE THAT WORK.

I'M GONNA GO CHANGE.

[YAWNS]

[FIGHT PLAYING ON TV]

CAN'T BELIEVE HE TALKS TO YOU LIKE THAT.

HE PROBABLY JUST HAD A HARD DAY.

HEY, IF MY GORGEOUS GIRLFRIEND

PUTS ON A DRESS LIKE THAT...

I DON'T CARE WHAT KINDA DAY I'VE HAD. I'M HAPPY.

AND I DON'T BREAK DINNER PLANS.

I'M SORRY.

I'M NOT HELPING.

YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT IT,

YOU CAN CALL A GIRLFRIEND OR SOMETHING.

AH...

I DON'T REALLY HAVE MANY FRIENDS HERE.

HEY, KIMBER, DON'T FEEL BAD.

I TOLD HIM, "SHE'S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN IN THE WORLD.

SHE'S NOT A 8--SHE'S A 15."

HE STILL THINKS I'M AN 8?

BUT I DID THE SURGERY.

I DON'T WANNA SOUND FORWARD, BUT...

HERE. TAKE MY BUSINESS CARD.

YOU THINK I NEED MORE WORK DONE?

NO.

I WANT YOU TO HAVE SOMEBODY TO CALL WHEN HE'S BEING A DICK.

AND IF YOU FEEL THE NEED TO UNLOAD ON SOMEBODY...

[APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS]

OK. YOU GONNA WATCH THE FIGHT?

NO.

I THINK I'M GONNA GO FOR A WALK AND GET SOME AIR.

GREAT.

[CHRISTIAN EXHALES]

[DOOR CLOSES]

HOW'D IT GO?

PHASE ONE COMPLETE.

MM-MMM.

[CLINK]

HOW DO I LOOK?

MORE FEMININE.

OK. BEHOLD...

I LOOK STRAIGHT.

I'M SORRY.

THEY DON'T MAKE A LIPSTICK SHADE CALLED BULL DYKE.

WELL, CAN I LOOK MORE...ME?

HA HA. OK.

BUT I MUST SAY, I'M A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED, LIZ.

'CAUSE I DON'T WANNA LOOK LIKE A CLOWN?

BECAUSE YOU OF ALL PEOPLE

SHOULD KNOW THAT A FACADE DOES NOT DETERMINE A PERSON.

WHY GET

A SEXUAL REASSIGNMENT SURGERY, SOPHIA?

BECAUSE MY FACADE IS HIDING MY PERSON.

I'M NOT TRYING TO BE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN.

I KNOW I'M NO SALMA HAYEK, OK?

I'M JUST TRYING TO GET RID OF THE MAN ON THE OUTSIDE

AS MUCH AS I CAN...

SO I SOMEWHAT CAN REFLECT WHAT I AM...

A WOMAN.

HAVE YOU ALWAYS BEEN A LESBIAN, LIZ?

WELL, I SLEPT WITH A MAN ONCE IN COLLEGE,

BUT HE HAD LONG HAIR, AND WHEN I CLOSED MY EYES

AND I FELT IT SWEEPING ACROSS MY FACE,

I PRETENDED HE WAS JONI MITCHELL.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

YOU GAY?

TODAY.

AND TOMORROW?

STRAIGHT.

AFTER THE SURGERY.

YOU'RE A CONUNDRUM WRAPPED UP IN A RIDDLE, BABE.

YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL.

I DO?

OH, I'M SORRY.

I PLUCK TOO MANY HAIRS?

IT HURTS, I KNOW.

NO, IT'S NOT THAT. I'M JUST SO SAD.

WHY?

I JUST WANNA LOVE SOMEONE.

AND I WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE ME BACK.

AND NOW I GO TO THE BARS AND...

I USED TO GET LOOKS BACK

WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, YOU KNOW?

AND NOW...I'M INVISIBLE.

IT'S LIKE THE WHOLE CULTURE

IS GEARED TOWARDS 25-YEAR-OLDS AND...

THAT'S NOT ME ANYMORE.

I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL, LIZ.

I'M LONELY, TOO.

I FEEL LIKE YOU DO, MAYBE THE PARADE PASSED ME BY.

I MEAN...I HAD TROUBLE GETTING MEN WHEN I WAS A MAN.

DIDN'T HAVE ANY MUSCLES.

I WAS A FEM...WHICH THE BOYS HATE THESE DAYS.

AND NOW I WANNA BE A WOMAN...

WHO, LET'S FACE IT...

STILL RESEMBLES A MAN.

AND I WONDER...

WHO'S GONNA WANT ME NOW?

WHO'LL SEE BEYOND THE...

THE MAKEUP AND THE SURGERIES

AND SEE THE PERSON WHO'S INSIDE?

[CRYING] SHIT.

THIS ISN'T WATERPROOF.

THIS IS THE WORST GIRLS' NIGHT OUT I EVER HAD.

ME, TOO.

AND YET, IT'S...

IT'S KIND OF THE BEST.

I SEE THE PERSON INSIDE YOU, SOPHIA.

RIGHT NOW.

I SEE YOU.

I SEE YOU, TOO, LIZ.

Jude: 8...

9...

OK. COME ON. COME ON.

LAST ONE. LAST ONE.

I CAN'T.

YOU GOT IT.

OH...OH!

DO ALL THE OTHER WOMEN YOU WORK WITH

NEED AS MUCH HELP AS I DO?

YOU'RE KIDDING ME, RIGHT?

I WISH ALL MY CLIENTS TRAINED AS HARD AS YOU.

OK, WE'RE NOT FINISHED YET.

OVER HERE.

ON YOUR BACK.

LEG UP.

WHAT ARE WE DOING NOW?

DO YOU TRUST ME?

OOH. OOH.

[GIGGLES]

Suzanne: JULIA.

QUELLE SURPRISE.

Julia: SUZANNE!

HI!

JUDE.

WORKING HARD TODAY, ARE WE?

YOU 2 KNOW EACH OTHER?

YES, I TRAINED A FRIEND OF SUZANNE'S A FEW MONTHS AGO.

I THINK WE'RE ALMOST DONE HERE.

5 MINUTES ON THE CARDIO.

FANCY A SMOOTHIE?

SURE.

MY TREAT.

HOW MUCH FOR JUDE?

ARE YOU PAYING RETAIL, HONEY?

HELL, EVEN IF YOU ARE,

APPARENTLY HE'S WORTH THE MONEY.

YEAH. HE WORKS ME OUT HARD.

OH, MY GOD.

YOU REALLY DON'T KNOW, DO YOU?

KNOW WHAT?

SWEETHEART...

HE'S NOT A REAL PERSONAL TRAINER.

THAT'S ONLY HOW HE MEETS HIS REAL CLIENTS.

FOR SEX, SWEETIE.

OHH...

DON'T BE SHOCKED.

ENJOY.

YOU PAID HIM TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU?

NO, NOT ME, BECAUSE I DO NOT HAVE THE MORALS OF AN ALLEY CAT.

BUT A LOT OF THE WOMEN IN MY SPINNING CLASS HAVE,

AND THE WORD IS...

ONCE JUDE PUTS YOU THROUGH HIS BEDROOM CALISTHENICS,

YOU FEEL THE BURN FOR DAYS.

THAT IS NOT TRUE.

JUDE IS A STUDENT--

HOW DO YOU THINK HE AFFORDS THOSE CLOTHES?

AND THAT APARTMENT?

NOT BY WORKING AT SUBWAY, SWEETIE.

[BEEPING]

HI.

HI.

LOOK, I DON'T KNOW HOW THIS IS GONNA SOUND,

SEEING IN 5 MINUTES

YOUR SCROTUM IS GONNA BE TURNED INTO A LABIA MAJORA,

BUT...

LAST NIGHT...

WAS INCREDIBLE.

YOU THOUGHT SO, TOO?

I...CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT IT.

ME, NEITHER.

IT'S THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME

THAT I FELT--

CONNECTED?

YEAH.

[EXHALES]

WHAT DO YOU THINK THAT WOULD BE LIKE...

TO WANT TO GET RID OF YOUR PENIS, THE HUB OF ALL POWER?

CAN YOU IMAGINE?

ACTUALLY, I ADMIRE HER CONVICTION.

IT TAKES...

BALLS?

WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE?

SHE DOESN'T WANNA HAVE THE OPERATION.

WHAT? SOPHIA, WHY?

I'M SORRY, DR. McNAMARA,

BUT I'M...I'M HAVING

A SEXUAL IDENTITY AND A SEXUAL PREFERENCE CRISIS.

I--I'M A WRECK.

SOPHIA, WHAT HAPPENED?

Sophia: LAST NIGHT,

I WAS INTIMATE WITH SOMEONE.

MORE INTIMATE THAN I'VE BEEN IN YEARS, AND...WELL...

NOW I CAN'T DO THIS TODAY.

I'M CONFUSED.

I'M SORRY. NOW I'M CONFUSED.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE WITH LIZ LAST NIGHT.

I'M GONNA GO PLAY GOLF.

MEGAN, IT'S SEAN.

MY AFTERNOON JUST OPENED UP.

* LET'S STAY *

* THIS WAY *

* I KINDA LIKE IT HERE *

* IT'S OK *

* I HAVEN'T GOT *

* A SINGLE BAD THING *

* TO SAY *

* I TELL YOU *

* YOU TELL ME *

* HOW IT'D FEEL IF I'D STILL PLEASE YOU *

* LOOKING INTO YOUR JEALOUS EYES *

* SO LET'S NOT TELL THE WORLD *

*SO LET'S NOT TELL THE WORLD *

* SO LET'S NOT TELL THE WORLD *

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[RING RING]

YOU'RE A DOCTOR.

YOU HAVE TO ANSWER THAT, REMEMBER?

[RINGING]

FOR ONE AFTERNOON IN MY LIFE,

I'M GONNA DO WHAT I WANNA DO, NOT WHAT I HAVE TO DO.

[RINGING]

THANKS.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

WHO IS IT?

OFFICE. SHIT!

HELLO?

YEAH, ALL RIGHT. I'LL BE THERE.

I FORGOT I SCHEDULED SURGERY TONIGHT.

TONIGHT? ISN'T THERE SOMEBODY ELSE ON CALL?

I'LL MAKE IT UP TO YOU. I PROMISE.

BUT THAT'S WHAT

WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING TONIGHT.

[CHRISTIAN CHUCKLES]

[DIALING]

HI. IT'S ME.

Merill: KIMBER?

YOU'RE KIDDING.

HE SAID HE HAD A SURGERY?

HE DIDN'T EVEN LEAVE ME MONEY FOR CAB FARE.

KIMBER, I HATE TO BE THE ONE TO BREAK IT TO YOU,

BUT NO PLASTIC SURGEON DOES SURGERY AFTER 6:00 ON A WEEKDAY.

IT'S A DIVERSION.

YOU THINK HE'S SEEING SOMEONE ELSE?

I'VE DONE THE DINNER PAGE THING.

EVER SINGLE DOCTOR I KNOW HAS.

IT'S...AN UGLY THING IS WHAT IT IS.

BUT I STOPPED AFTER I DISCOVERED KABALA.

IT'S OK.

BETTER TO FIND OUT NOW.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

MERILL.

PHASE 2 SEDUCTION IS COMPLETE.

SHE'S IN THE BATHROOM NOW BARFING UP A BOTTLE OF VEUVE.

IT'S GOIN' GREAT.

MERILL, WE'RE BOTH GOING TO HELL FOR THIS,

YOU KNOW.

AS LONG AS IT AIN'T TONIGHT.

SHE'S WEAVIN' UP. I GOTTA GO.

JULES?

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

LATE SURGERY.

HOW WAS YOUR DAY, MATT?

SHITTY.

YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT IT?

I TRIED CALLING YOU EARLIER,

BUT THE OFFICE SAID YOU WERE GONE.

YOU DIDN'T ANSWER YOUR CELL PHONE EITHER.

WELL...I'M HERE NOW.

WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND?

HOW COME YOU NEVER RAISED ANNIE AND ME

WITH ANY RELIGIOUS BACKGROUND?

UH...YOUR MOTHER AND I

THOUGHT YOU SHOULD MAKE

YOUR OWN DECISIONS ABOUT FAITH...

WHEN YOU'RE READY.

BUT...

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD AT ALL?

LIKE IF...WE HURT SOMEONE

AND DON'T TAKE RESPONSIBILITY,

HE KNOWS ABOUT IT.

BECAUSE IF THAT'S TRUE...

WE CAN'T REALLY GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING, CAN WE?

WHAT ARE YOU GETTIN' AT, MATT?

I'M SAYIN'...YOU CAN LIE TO YOURSELF,

YOUR FRIENDS, YOUR FAMILY...

BUT YOU CAN'T LIE TO GOD.

SO THE ONLY THING TO DO...

IS CONFESS.

RIGHT?

HOW DID YOU FIND OUT?

WHEN YOU OPENED THE DOOR AND SAW US TOGETHER?

UH...

WHAT DID I SEE?

STOP THE GAMES, MATT.

I'M TELLING YOU MAN-TO-MAN, YES, I'M HAVING AN AFFAIR.

I'M GONNA END IT.

I JUST...NEEDED SOMETHING...

AND SHE GAVE IT TO ME.

HOW COULD YOU CHEAT ON MOM?

YOUR DAD LEFT YOU GUYS FOR ANOTHER WOMAN.

YOU--YOU TOLD ME THAT.

YOU'VE BEEN TELLING ME THAT STORY

SINCE I WAS A LITTLE KID

ABOUT HOW THAT HURT YOU SO MUCH.

I'M NOT MY FATHER.

I'M NOT!

LISTEN TO ME, MATT.

NOTHING IN YOUR LIFE IS GONNA BE DISRUPTED.

YOU CHEATED ON MOM?

I DON'T KNOW YOU RIGHT NOW.

I WON'T SEE HER AGAIN.

YOU'RE MORE IMPORTANT TO ME.

THIS FAMILY IS MORE IMPORTANT TO ME.

WE WON'T TELL YOUR MOM,

AND THIS WILL ALL GO AWAY. I PROMISE.

I PROMISE.

MORNIN'.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I WAS STARING AT THE NOSE JOB CHRISTIAN GAVE YOU.

FRANKLY, I COULDA DONE BETTER.

OH, MY GOD.

DID WE...SLEEP TOGETHER?

DON'T YOU REMEMBER?

NO, WE DIDN'T SLEEP TOGETHER.

I MEAN, WE SLEPT TOGETHER,

BUT I PERSONALLY DIDN'T SLEEP.

YOU SNORED.

YOU WERE REALLY DRUNK.

WHERE ARE THE REST OF MY CLOTHES? I GOTTA GO.

GO WHERE?

BACK TO CHRISTIAN TO SEE IF HE'LL FORGIVE ME.

FORGIVE YOU? COME ON!

GET BACK IN BED.

MERILL...THANK YOU FOR LAST NIGHT.

I DON'T WANNA GIVE YOU THE WRONG IMPRESSION.

THERE'S NOTHING GOING ON BETWEEN US.

YOU'RE NOT MY TYPE.

HOW AM I NOT YOUR TYPE?

I MAKE MORE MONEY THAN CHRISTIAN,

I'M MORE FAMOUS,

AND LET'S FACE THE FACTS, DARLIN'.

YOU KNOW CHRISTIAN WILL THROW YOU OUT EVENTUALLY

AS YOUR ASS CONTINUES ITS INEVITABLE DOWNWARD SLIDE.

BUT I WON'T.

YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME.

GET IT THROUGH YOUR FUZZY HEAD, OK?

I'M NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU!

YOU DON'T LIKE THE HAIR?

OK. IT'S GOOFY.

I'LL CHANGE IT FOR YOU.

YEAH? WELL, YOU'LL STILL BE A 4.

I'M SORRY.

HE'S NOT GONNA TAKE YOU BACK.

YOU 2 MAY LOOK GOOD TOGETHER,

BUT...YOU'RE NOT WHAT HE WANTS.

YOU NEVER WERE.

HE LOVES ME. I KNOW HE DOES.

HE TRADED YOU FOR A GODDAMN CAR!

HOW'S THAT FOR LOVE?

SEAN, MEGAN O'HARA AGAIN, LINE 2.

I'M HEADING INTO A CONSULT. TAKE A MESSAGE.

Jude: YOU HAVEN'T RETURNED MY CALLS THIS WEEK.

WHY?

I'VE BEEN BUSY.

I DON'T WANNA STUDY. I WANNA TALK.

NO, JUDE. I GET TO TALK. YOU GET TO LISTEN.

YOU'RE A LIAR.

YOU'RE A LIAR AND A FAKE.

SO THAT'S WHY YOU CALLED ME OVER TODAY.

'CAUSE YOU FOUND OUT.

YEAH, I FOUND OUT.

I WANTED TO TELL YOU.

YOU OF ALL PEOPLE, BUT...

I DIDN'T KNOW HOW.

SO SAY IT.

TELL ME WHAT YOU ARE TO MY FACE.

OK.

[AMERICAN ACCENT] I'M NOT REALLY BRITISH.

I'M NOT FROM LONDON. I'M FROM NEW HAMPSHIRE.

I STARTED THE WHOLE ACCENT THING

TO...BOOST BUSINESS WHEN I MOVED OUT HERE LAST YEAR.

YOU'RE FROM NEW HAMPSHIRE.

YOU KNOW HOW WOMEN LIKE THE WHOLE...FOREIGN,

SOPHISTICATED VIBE... THING.

KEEP GOING.

I TOLD YOU EVERYTHING.

YOU HATE ME?

I HATE MYSELF.

WHY?

I'VE BEEN SO DESPERATELY LONELY

THAT I FELL FOR A CON MAN...

WHO'S ALSO A HOOKER.

I WASN'T EVER YOUR FRIEND.

I WAS JUST ANOTHER PAYCHECK.

WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, HOLD ON!

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!

JUDE, I KNOW!

I KNOW WOMEN PAY YOU FOR THEIR ORGASMS.

WHO TOLD YOU THIS?

SUZANNE, HUH?

YOU TRUST THAT BITCH OVER ME?

SHE HATES YOU.

HOW COULD YOU THINK THAT ABOUT ME...

THAT I WOULD RENT MYSELF OUT TO WOMEN LIKE HER?

I'M A TRAINER, JULIA, NOT A WHORE.

I GUESS 'CAUSE I'M COMING CLEAN NOW,

WHY DON'T WE GET EVERYTHING OUT IN THE OPEN, OK?

I DO HAVE FEELINGS FOR YOU.

AND I KNOW THAT IT'S WRONG...

FOR THE BOTH OF US.

BUT I CAN'T FIGHT WHAT I FEEL ANYMORE.

GET OUT, JUDE. YOU CAN'T AFFORD ME.

SO I MADE UP A VOICE,

ALL RIGHT, BUT DON'T TRY AND--DON'T JUDGE ME

FOR TRYING TO BE A BETTER PERSON, A DIFFERENT PERSON.

AREN'T YOU TRYING TO DO THE SAME THING?

YOU WERE A HOUSEWIFE,

AND NOW YOU'RE GOING TO MEDICAL SCHOOL,

AND YOU'RE ASKING PEOPLE TO PERCEIVE YOU DIFFERENTLY.

AND YOU WON'T GIVE ME THAT SAME BREAK.

YOU'RE VERY SAD.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

HI.

LIZ.

Man's voice: WE KNOW.

OH, MY MANNERS.

COME IN.

DON'T MIND THEM, LIZ.

THEY JUST WANT ME TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF MY OPPORTUNITIES

AND GET THE SURGERY.

SO DO I.

IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND, LIZ.

I...I THOUGHT YOU WERE CONFUSED LIKE ME.

COME ON, SOPHIA.

LET'S BE REAL.

WE CAME TOGETHER OUT OF LONELINESS, NOT PASSION.

THE TRUTH IS, YOU LIKE MEN.

I LIKE WOMEN.

IT WOULD BE WONDERFUL

IF WE COULD LOOK BEYOND THE WRAPPING

FOR THE REAL PRESENT INSIDE,

BUT I WORK IN A PLASTIC SURGEON'S OFFICE.

I KNOW MORE THAN ANYONE THAT NEVER REALLY HAPPENS.

ONLY IN FAIRY TALES.

I GUESS I'M JUST THROWN BECAUSE...

WE...WE HAD SUCH CHEMISTRY, LIZ.

THAT'S RARE.

CHEMISTRY CAN LEAD TO FRIENDSHIP.

AND I'M HERE AS YOUR FRIEND

TO TELL YOU THAT I THINK THAT YOU

WANNA BECOME A STRAIGHT WOMAN,

AND YOU SHOULD.

THE DOCTORS HAVE AN OPENING TOMORROW AFTERNOON.

THE APPOINTMENT IS YOURS IF YOU WANT IT.

HEY, BABY.

SEE? I'M NOT MAD.

AND WHY WOULD YOU BE?

I KNOW, CHRISTIAN.

ABOUT WHAT?

HONEY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO LIE ANYMORE.

OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP WAS BUILT ON DECEIT.

CAN'T WE JUST END IT IN TRUTH?

I KNOW YOU TRADED ME FOR THE CAR.

MERILL TOLD ME EVERYTHING.

YOU'RE NOT MAD?

MAD? HOW COULD I BE MAD?

ISN'T THE LAMBORGHINI WORTH 250 GRAND?

THAT MUST MEAN I'M WORTH A LOT.

AT FIRST I WAS A BIT STUNNED,

BUT THEN I REALIZED...SHIT,

YOU'RE NEVER GONNA SETTLE DOWN.

WHY SHOULD I?

MY MODELING CAREER IS TAKING OFF.

THAT'S WHAT I WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING--

EVEN MORE THAN YOU.

I'M GLAD YOU REALIZE THAT, KIMBER.

MAYBE A BREAK COULD BE GOOD FOR US.

A BREAK...

WITH THE OCCASIONAL BENEFITS.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

WHEN I FOUND OUT HOW MUCH THE CAR WAS WORTH...

I GOT HOT.

ISN'T THAT WEIRD?

DID HE TOUCH YOU?

TRIED.

DOESN'T THAT MAKE YOU HOT, TOO, BABY,

BEING ABLE TO SCREW NOW AND THEN

WHAT YOUR BIGGEST COMPETITOR COULDN'T?

I KNOW HOW YOU LOVE TO ROLE PLAY.

I'VE BROUGHT TOYS.

WHAT KIND OF TOYS?

* WHAT ARE THE WORDS *

* YOU WOULD SAY? *

* THAT YOU SHOULD LEAVE ME? *

IS THAT AS TIGHT AS YOU CAN MAKE THEM?

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

TO GET ANOTHER TOY.

* ALL THE MISTAKES I MADE *

WHAT'S THAT FOR?

YOU HAVE NO FEELINGS WHATSOEVER, DO YOU?

OH, I WAS WRONG. YOU DO!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING, YOU CRAZY BITCH?

GETTING READY TO PLAY DOCTOR.

[MUSIC PLAYS]

YOU ALWAYS PLAY MUSIC DURING SURGERY, RIGHT?

LET ME GO. PLEASE.

I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.

NOT MY PROBLEM.

YOU'RE THE ONE.

THE ONE WHO VANDALIZED MY CAR, MY BOAT.

AREN'T YOU?

I DON'T KNOW, CHRISTIAN.

IT LOOKS LIKE YOU COULD BE

GETTING SOME LOVE HANDLES.

I COULD FIX THAT FOR YOU.

HELL, IF YOU CAN DO IT, HOW HARD COULD IT BE?

* WANNA KNOW HOW MUCH *

* I LOVE YOU? *

* WANNA KNOW HOW MUCH I CARE? *

YOU KNOW WHAT I SEE, CHRISTIAN?

I SEE AN ASSHOLE WHO HAS SPENT HIS WHOLE LIFE

HURTING OTHER PEOPLE BECAUSE HE HATES HIMSELF.

I THINK...THE REST OF THE WORLD

NEEDS TO SEE WHAT A MESS YOU REALLY ARE.

* FEVER WHEN YOU HOLD ME TIGHT *

* FEVER *

FIRST...WE'RE GONNA CARVE OPEN

THE EYES A BIT...

SO YOU CAN ACTUALLY NOTICE

SOMETHING BESIDES YOURSELF.

YOU FIGHT ME, AND I WILL MAKE

YOU UGLY, I SWEAR TO GOD!

* MOON LIGHTS UP THE NIGHT *

* I LIGHT UP WHEN YOU CALL MY NAME *

* AND YOU KNOW I'M GONNA *

* TREAT YOU RIGHT *

* YOU GIVE ME FEVER... *

AFTER THE EYES,

WE'RE GONNA CUT OFF THE OTHER SIDE OF THE MOUTH,

THE ONE THAT YOU TALK SHIT OUT OF ALL THE TIME.

* FEVER *

* IN THE MORNING *

* FEVER ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT *

* EVERYBODY'S GOT THE FEVER *

WAIT.

DO YOU THINK IF I STAB YOU HERE,

YOU'LL EVEN BLEED,

CONSIDERING YOU DON'T HAVE A HEART?

DON'T DO IT, KIMBER.

YOU'LL GO TO JAIL.

YOUR CAREER WILL BE OVER.

I'M PUSHING 30.

MY CAREER IS ALREADY OVER.

KIMBER, I'M SORRY.

I'M REALLY, TRULY SORRY.

YOU'RE SORRY, HUH?

THEN CRY FOR ME.

CRY FOR ME!

GODDAMN IT, CRY FOR ME!

* ROMEO LOVED JULIET *

I TRIED SO HARD TO MAKE THIS RELATIONSHIP WORK.

I TRIED SO HARD, CHRISTIAN.

WHY COULDN'T YOU JUST LOVE ME?

* HE SAID, "JULIET, BABY, YOU'RE THE ONE *

IT'S NOT YOU.

I'VE NEVER LOVED ANYONE.

* WHEN YOU KISS ME *

* FEVER WITH YOUR FLAMING YOUTH *

* FEVER...I'M ON FIRE *

YOU KNOW WHAT?

I CAN'T KILL YOU.

YOU'RE ALREADY DEAD.

* NOW YOU'VE LISTENED TO MY STORY *

* HERE'S THE POINT I HAVE MADE *

* CHICKS WERE BORN TO *

* GIVE YOU FEVER *

* BE IT FAHRENHEIT OR CENTIGRADE *

* THEY GIVE YOU FEVER *

JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR...

I'M KEEPING YOUR CAR.

* FEVER IF YOU LIVE AND LEARN *

WELL, YOU CAN'T JUST

LEAVE ME HERE LIKE THIS.

YOU'LL BE FINE, CHRISTIAN.

YOUR MAID COMES ON FRIDAY.

* WHAT A LOVELY WAY TO BURN *

Nurse: SEAN, SORRY.

MEGAN O'HARA AGAIN.

SHE SAYS IT'S AN EMERGENCY.

I'LL CALL HER BACK.

SHE'S IN YOUR OFFICE.

THE CANCER'S METASTASIZED IN MY LYMPH NODES.

IT'S ALREADY STAGE 4.

MY ONCOLOGIST THINKS...

THE IMPLANT OPERATION

LOWERED MY IMMUNE SYSTEM.

THE STRESS OF THE RECOVERY

HELPED THE TUMORS GET A STRONG FOOTHOLD.

NO ONE COULD HAVE PREDICTED THIS, SEAN.

IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT. YOU WARNED ME OF THE RISKS.

THERE ARE WAYS TO FIGHT THIS, MEGAN.

CHEMO WON'T WORK THIS TIME.

THERE'S ALREADY FLUID IN THE LUNGS.

THEN WE'LL LOOK AT OTHER TREATMENTS.

ICH THERAPY, FOR INSTANCE.

IT'S AGGRESSIVE, NOT LIKE CHEMO,

IT'LL HEAT UP YOUR CELLS FROM THE INSIDE OUT--

I DON'T NEED ANOTHER DOCTOR RIGHT NOW, SEAN.

I NEED YOU.

BUT I CAN'T HAVE YOU, CAN I?

YOU'RE MARRIED.

YOU HAVE KIDS, A CAREER,

EVERYTHING TO LOSE.

I'M SORRY.

THIS IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM.

HEY...YOU'RE RIGHT.

I DO HAVE EVERYTHING TO LOSE.

THAT DIDN'T STOP ME BEFORE.

AND IT WON'T STOP ME NOW.

I'M HERE.

I'M AFRAID, LIZ.

HOLD MY HAND DURING THE SURGERY

LIKE YOU DID LAST NIGHT.

SOPHIA...YOU ARE THE NEEDIEST CHICK I EVER ALMOST DATED.

OF COURSE I WILL.

SOPHIA, BEFORE WE BEGIN THE SURGERY,

I NEED TO MAKE ABSOLUTELY SURE.

ARE YOU PREPARED THIS TIME?

BECAUSE IT'S NOT GONNA GROW BACK.

YES.

ALL RIGHT.

LET'S DO IT.

SOME DAY WE'LL FIND THE ONE

WHO LOVES US FOR WHO WE ARE, LIZ.

A GIRL CAN DREAM, RIGHT?

[BEEPING]

I NEED YOU TO COUNT BACK FROM 10.

10...

9...

8...

LET'S PREP HER.

* ON MY WAY UP NORTH *

* UP ON THE VENTURA *

* I PULLED BACK THE HOOD *

* AND I WAS TALKIN' TO YOU AND I *

* KNEW THEN IT WOULD BE *

* A LIFELONG THING, BUT I DIDN'T *

* KNOW THAT WE *

* WE COULD BREAK A *

* SILVER LINING, AND I'M *

* SO SAD *

* LIKE A GOOD BOOK *

* I CAN'T PUT THIS *

* DAY BACK *

* A SORTA FAIRY TALE WITH YOU *

* A SORTA FAIRY TALE WITH YOU *

* A SORTA FAIRY TALE WITH YOU *

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--