Original subtitles

[BARKING]

MISS BEADLE MADE WILLIE OLESON STAY AFTER SCHOOL AGAIN

FOR TALKING IN CLASS.

Laura: THAT MAKES 3 DAYS NOW.

ONE MORE, AND SHE'S GOING TO TALK TO HIS MOTHER.

WHAT IS THE MATTER?

Charles: WHAT COULD BE THE MATTER?

YOU ALL LOOK LIKE YOU HAVE SOMETHING UP YOUR SLEEVE.

WELL, AS A MATTER OF FACT, I WAS THINKING.

I KNEW IT.

WELL, I WAS THINKING-- I'M GOING TO TAKE A TRIP TO MANKATO.

IT'S GOING TO BE VERY LONESOME,

JUST ME, A COUPLE OF HORSES, A LOAD OF LUMBER.

AND THEN I GOT TO THINKING IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME

SINCE MY WIFE HAD A HOLIDAY.

CHARLES, YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS.

WELL, I CAN, AND I AM.

I WANT YOU TO GO WITH ME.

BUT THIS IS MONDAY, AND YOU WON'T BE BACK TILL SATURDAY.

WE'LL GET ALONG JUST FINE, MA.

IT WILL BE FUN. WE CAN DO IT.

SURE, THEY CAN.

WELL, YOU DON'T EXPECT ME TO GO TRAIPSING OFF

AND LEAVE 3 CHILDREN ALL ALONE ON THE PRAIRIE.

OF COURSE NOT. I FIGURED GRACE COULD TAKE CARE OF THEM.

WELL, YOU REALLY CAN'T ASK ANOTHER WOMAN JUST TO MOVE IN--

WELL, I ALREADY DID. GRACE SAID SHE'D BE MORE THAN HAPPY.

WELL..

PLEASE, MA? PLEASE?

WHAT IF SOMETHING WENT WRONG,

IF ONE OF THEM GOT SICK OR--

GRACE IS A VERY RESPONSIBLE WOMAN, ISN'T SHE?

YES.

THEN IT'S SETTLED.

YOU AND I ARE GOING TO HAVE A HOLIDAY.

HO!

OH, GRACE, AM I TOO EARLY?

[IN HOARSE VOICE] NO. IT'S NOT THAT.

I WANTED TO SEND WORD TO YOU.

IT'S JUST THAT I'VE GOT THIS TERRIBLY SORE THROAT.

OH, I'M SORRY.

COULDN'T YOU POSTPONE YOUR TRIP TILL I'M FEELING BETTER?

I WISH I COULD, BUT I PROMISED OLESON

I'D HAVE THAT MERCHANDISE I'M HAULING FOR HIM SATURDAY AT THE LATEST.

OH. WELL, MAYBE IF I WAS TO BUNDLE UP REAL GOOD.

NO, NO. I WOULDN'T THINK OF THAT.

YOU TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. STAY WARM.

OH, CHARLES, I'M JUST SICK ABOUT THIS.

NOTHING WE CAN DO ABOUT IT. TAKE CARE.

[CLICKS TONGUE]

NOW, IT'S GOING TO BE UP TO YOU GIRLS TO KEEP EVERYTHING SPOTLESS.

I DON'T WANT MRS. SNIDER-- DO YOU KNOW WHERE THE KEROSENE IS?

WE KNOW, MA.

AND YOU KNOW HOW TO SKIM THE MILK?

YES, MA.

Laura: WE'VE SEEN YOU Do IT A HUNDRED TIMES.

Caroline: AND DON'T YOU FORGET TO COMB OUT YOUR HAIR

AND BRUSH IT EVERY NIGHT

AND TO SAY YOUR PRAYERS BEFORE YOU GO TO BED AND--

FEED THE CHICKENS.

AND GATHER THE EGGS.

AND AIR THE SHEETS.

THAT'S RIGHT, AN D--

OH, DEAR.

THERE'S SO MANY THINGS, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'VE FORGOTTEN.

Mary: HERE COMES PA!

OH, NO. I'M NOT READY.

Laura: WHERE'S MRS. SNIDER?

Charles: AH, SHE COULDN'T COME, HALF-PINT.

SHE'S SICK-- GOT A SORE THROAT.

Mary: COULDN'T WE GET SOMEBODY ELSE, PA?

Charles: I TRIED. I JUST COULDN'T.

I'M SORRY.

WELL...IT'S PROBABLY ALL FOR THE BEST.

MAYBE IT IS.

[SOMEONE WHISTLING OLD DAN TUCKER]

[GIRLS TALKING AT ONCE]

YOU WON'T HAVE TO DO A THING AROUND THE HOUSE.

WE'LL CLEAN AND EVERYTHING.

LT'LL BE FUN. PLEASE SAY YOU WILL, MR. EDWARDS.

SAY I WILL WHAT?

WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THIS THING ONE AT A TIME?

MA CAN'T GO TO MANKATO WITH PA UNLESS SOMEBODY STAYS WITH US.

AND WE JUST THOUGHT MAYBE YOU COULD, IF YOU HAD A MIND TO.

STAY WITH YOU KIDS-- IS THAT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT?

YES! PLEASE?

PLEASE?

WOULD YOU BEHAVE YOURSELF AND MIND WHAT YOU'RE TOLD?

HOPE TO DIE!

YOU MEAN YOU WILL?

WELL, I MIGHT COULD BE PERSUADED.

YEAH! YEAH!

THAT'S GREAT!

WE'LL BE GOOD.

WE PROMISE! WE PROMISE!

Carrie: WE'LL Do EVERYTHING YOU SAY.

Edwards: HOW COME YOU SMELL SO MUCH OF LEMON VERBENA?

AFTER ALL, CARRIE IS A LITTLE YOUNG FOR ME TO LEAVE HER.

I SUPPOSE SO.

Laura: MA, YOU CAN Go!

Mary: MR. EDWARDS IS GOING To LOOK OUT FOR US.

Charles: HEY, NOW, THAT'S THE BEST NEWS I HEARD ALL DAY!

EDWARDS.

Caroline: CHARLES?

Edwards: OH, DON'T THINK NOTHING OF IT.

WHAT ARE NEIGHBORS FOR EXCEPT TO BE NEIGHBORLY?

I THOUGHT YOU WERE WORKING AT THE MILL.

I GOT LAID OFF FOR THIS WEEK.

SEEMS LIKE THE LORD SENT MR. EDWARDS TO US.

WELL, I'M SURE MR. EDWARDS HAS OTHER THINGS HE'D RATHER DO

THAN TEND TO 3 LITTLE GIRLS.

NOW, IF THEY WERE LITTLE BOYS--

WE CAN DO ANYTHING BOYS CAN DO.

THAT MAY BE, BUT-- SURE, THEY CAN.

I DON'T KNOW WHY I DIDN'T THINK OF YOU FIRST OFF.

I'M GOING TO FEEL A LOT SAFER

HAVING A MAN AROUND THE PLACE

WHILE WE'RE GONE, WON'T YOU?

WHAT TIME YOU FOLKS FIGURING TO SHOVE OFF?

THE SOONER, THE BETTER. I'D LIKE TO MAKE MANKATO BY SUNSET TOMORROW.

MR. EDWARDS, IF THIS IS INCONVENIENCING YOU--

OH, NO, NO. NOT AT ALL.

ALL I GOT TO DO IS GO HOME AND GET ANOTHER SHIRT.

THAT MEANS THE CHILDREN WOULD BE LEFT ALONE, DOESN'T IT?

NO. WE'LL GO WITH HIM. WE CAN HELP HIM.

I WON'T LEAVE THEM OUT OF MY SIGHT, IF THAT'S WHAT'S FRETTING YOU.

IT'S ALL SETTLED. I'LL GET THE SATCHEL.

NOW, IT'S ONLY UNTIL SATURDAY.

Mary: WE KNOW, MA.

AND IF THERE'S ANYTHING YOU DON'T KNOW--

Laura: WE'RE To ASK MR. EDWARDS.

THAT'S RIGHT. AND LET HIM LIGHT THE LAMP AND THE FIRE.

I DON'T WANT YOU FIDDLING WITH MATCHES.

Charles: COME ON, LET'S Go.

YOU ALL DON'T WORRY ABOUT A THING.

I WON'T WORRY.

WE'LL BE GOOD, MA.

WE REALLY WILL. WE PROMISE.

WELL, I'VE MADE YOUR MEALS FOR TODAY.

SO ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS WARM THEM UP.

YES, MA. AND--

OH, I KNOW I'VE FORGOTTEN SOMETHING.

YOU MIND MR. EDWARDS WHILE WE'RE GONE, ALL RIGHT?

YES, PA.

I LOVE YOU.

MWAH! MWAH!

GIVE ME A KISS.

ALL RIGHT.

NOW, YOU BE A GOOD GIRL, SWEETHEART.

I WILL.

GOOD-BYE, SWEETIE.

MOMMY.

HA HA!

OH, MR. EDWARDS, I WOULDN'T. I--

KIDS LOVE IT.

THEY LOVE IT. WOULD YOU GET ON THE WAGON?

IF YOU'RE GOOD, I'LL BRING YOU A PRESENT FROM MANKATO.

WATCH OUT FOR RATTLERS IN THE GRASS.

Laura: WE WILL, MA.

OH, AND DON'T LET CARRIE GO TO THE CREEK ALONE.

Mary: WE NEVER DO, MA.

AND, GIRLS--

CAROLINE, THAT'S ENOUGH.

ALL RIGHT.

CAROLINE, MAN KATO'S THIS WAY.

WELL, NOW, IT SEEMS LIKE I SLIPPED WHEN I MADE

THAT LAST CUT INTO THE TREE TRUNK.

THIS BIG, OLD, CUSSED THING COMES CRASHING DOWN ON ME,

PINNING ME RIGHT TO THE GROUND.

WELL, NOW, I KNOW THERE'S NOT A LMNG SOUL

WITHIN 50 MILES OF THERE.

SO I SAYS TO MYSELF, I SAYS,

"MR. EDWARDS, YOUR NUMBER IS UP FOR SURE THIS TIME."

THEN YOU KNOW WHAT I DONE?

NO. WHAT? NO. WHAT?

WELL, SIR, I KIND OF RAISED UP MOST AS A COULD,

AND I REACHED BACK AND WAS ABLE TO GET

A PLUG OF CHAWING TOBACCO OUT OF MY BACK POCKET.

SEE, I FIGURED I MIGHT AS WELL DIE HAPPY.

BUT YOU DIDN'T DIE, DID YOU?

OF COURSE HE DIDN'T DIE.

WELL, HE MIGHT HAVE AND THEN COME BACK TO LIFE AGAIN.

THEY DO THAT A LOT IN THE BIBLE.

WELL, WOULDN'T WANT TO TAKE A CHANCE ON THAT.

WHAT HAPPENED NEXT, MR. EDWARDS?

HMM, NEXT.

WELL, TWO, 3 DAYS MUST HAVE PASSED, YOU SEE,

AND I WAS GETTING POWERFUL HUNGRY, POWERFUL HUNGRY.

WELL, I FALLS ASLEEP, DON'T YOU SEE,

AND I DREAMED THAT THESE INDIANS COME ALONG

AND LIFTED THAT TREE RIGHT OFF OF ME.

ONLY IT WASN'T A DREAM.

HOW'D YOU KNOW THAT? THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED, THOUGH.

YES, SIR. THEN YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?

NO. TELL US! NO. TELL US!

THEY GOT A CUSTOM AMONG SAVAGES.

THAT CUSTOM IS THAT WHEN THEY SAVE A MAN'S LIFE,

HE BECOMES THEIR BLOOD BROTHER FROM THEN ON.

GET YOURSELF AN INDIAN MONIKER, TOO.

WHAT'S YOURS, MR. EDWARDS?

OH...

YOU EVER HEAR OF SITTING BULL?

NO.

THAT'S THE ONE THEY GAVE ME-- SITTING BULL.

GOLLY!

CARRIE, NO, NO! WHAT IF MA SAW YOU DO THAT?

WELL, AIN'T NOBODY GONNA TELL MA, HUH?

WELL, ANYWAY, SHE OUGHT TO EAT HER SUPPER.

OH, SURE, SURE, SURE. SHE'LL DO THAT.

HERE YOU GO.

COME ON, NOW. OPEN UP YOUR FACE.

YOU GOT TO GET SOME OF THIS INSIDE YOU IF YOU WANT TO GROW.

COME ON.

COME ON, OPEN IT UP.

HERE, DO ONE OF THESE.

COME ON.

HERE, YOU BETTER TRY IT.

I GUESS YOU CAN'T FORCE HER.

HERE, CARRIE. TAKE IT.

CARRIE, YOU PROMISED YOU'D BE A GOOD GIRL.

GOOD GIRL!

HEY, DO YOU PUT UP WITH THIS AT EVERY MEAL, DO YOU?

Mary: SHE'S JUST TEASING YOU.

SHE'LL PROBABLY EAT WHEN SHE'S HUNGRY.

WE'LL DO THE DISHES.

OH, WELL, I'LL HELP YOU. HERE WE GO. HERE WE GO, JACK.

THERE. NOTHING CLEANER THAN A HOUND'S TOOTH, I HEAR TELL.

OH.

ALL RIGHT, WHAT'S NEXT ON THE DOCKET?

WELL, BETTER GIVE THE COWS SOME HAY

AND... CLEAN OUT THE STALL.

WELL, THAT'S MAN'S WORK.

WON'T TELL MA ABOUT JACK LICKING OFF CARRIE'S DISH.

YOU BET. SHE'LL NEVER LET MR. EDWARDS STAY WITH US AGAIN.

DO YOU BELIEVE THAT STUFF ABOUT, YOU KNOW, SITTING BULL?

WELL, I DIDN'T WANT TO SAY ANYTHING,

BUT THERE'S A REAL SITTING BULL.

THERE IS?

I SAW IT IN THE PAPER PA BROUGHT BACK FROM MANKATO LAST WEEK.

HE MASSACRED GENERAL CUSTER

IN A PLACE CALLED LITTLE BIGHORN.

MR. EDWARDS DID?

NO, SILLY. THAT'S NOT HIS REAL NAME.

THAT MAKES MR. EDWARDS A LIAR, DOESN'T IT?

WELL, THERE MAY BE LOTS OF SITTING BULLS.

LOTS OF PEOPLE NAMED SMITH, AREN'T THERE?

BETTER DO THIS TONIGHT, TILL YOU GET THE HANG OF IT.

DON'T LOOK LIKE ALL THAT MUCH TO ME.

Mary: THERE.

ALL RIGHT, NOW. COME ON. COME ON.

[EDWARDS YAWNS]

WELL, I GUESS IT'S ABOUT TIME WE ALL HIT THE HAY.

WOULD YOU PLEASE TELL US A STORY, MR. EDWARDS?

STORY? OH, NO, NO. IT'S TOO LATE FOR THAT.

NOW, YOU REMEMBER WHAT YOU PROMISED YOUR FATHER--

NO BACK TALK. NOW, OFF YOU GO.

AREN'T YOU GOING TO LISTEN TO US SAY OUR PRAYERS?

WELL, YOUR FOLKS DO THAT, DO THEY?

EVERY NIGHT.

WELL, THEN, I GUESS I AIN'T GOT NO CHOICE.

Both: NOW I LAY ME DOWN TO SLEEP,

I PRAY THE LORD MY SOUL TO KEEP,

IF I SHOULD DIE BEFORE I AWAKE,

I PRAY THE LORD MY SOUL TO TAKE.

AMEN.

WELL, THERE AIN'T NO DANGER OF THAT TONIGHT.

COME ON, OFF YOU GO.

AREN'T YOU GOING TO KISS US GOOD NIGHT? MA AND PA ALWAYS DO.

OH, WELL...

ALL RIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT, MR. EDWARDS.

GOOD NIGHT, MR. EDWARDS.

SLEEP TIGHT.

[YAWNS]

THE EGGS!

WHAT?

I FORGOT TO REMIND THEM TO CARRY THE EGGS TO--

CAROLINE, NOW, PLEASE. THIS IS YOUR HOLIDAY.

YOU CAN'T SPEND THE WHOLE TIME WORRYING ABOUT THE GIRLS.

BUT IF THE EGGS SPOIL--

ALL RIGHT, LISTEN. I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU A DEAL.

IF YOU DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE GIRLS,

IF YOU DON'T TALK ABOUT THE GIRLS FOR THE REST OF THE TRIP,

I'LL BUY YOU A NEW BONNET IN MANKATO.

ARE YOU TRYING TO BRIBE ME?

CALL IT A PRESENT,

WITH CERTAIN CONDITIONS ATTACHED.

SAME THING.

WOULD IT BE SO HARD TO DO?

YOU KNOW, I CAN REMEMBER BEFORE THOSE 3 LITTLE ONES CAME ALONG,

YOU AND I HAD LOTS TO TALK ABOUT.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

THIS ISN'T MY HOLIDAY, IT'S OURS TOGETHER,

AND I'M NOT GOING TO SPOIL IT OUR VERY FIRST NIGHT AWAY

BY WORRYING ABOUT THEM WHEN THEY'RE FAST ASLEEP.

THAT'S MY GIRL.

[SIGHS]

IF THE EGGS SPOIL, THEY SPOIL.

[CARRIE CRYING]

WHAT'S THIS?

[CRYING CONTINUES]

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

AH, YOU'RE HUNGRY.

YES. ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.

PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER. I'LL GET YOU SOMETHING TO EAT.

[MUTTERS]

GOT TO BE A BETTER SYSTEM THAN THIS.

MAN CAN'T GO AROUND GETTING UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT EVERY NIGHT.

NO, SIR. GOT TO HAVE YOUR SLEEP, FOR SURE.

YOU GOT TO HAVE YOUR SLEEP, TOO,

OR YOU'RE GONNA BE SHORT FOREVER.

AH, SURE. THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD. YOU'RE GONNA LIKE THIS.

LIKE THAT. WE'LL DO THIS JUST ONCE.

THEN YOU AND ME ARE GONNA COME TO AN UNDERSTANDING ABOUT MEAL HOURS.

THERE. THAT LOOKS GOOD.

THERE YOU ARE, CARRIE.

CARRIE?

CARRIE!

LET'S SEE.

GOD LOVE YOU. HEH.

COME HERE, JACK. COME HERE, JACK.

THERE YOU ARE. COME ON. EAT 'ER UP THERE.

YOU DO UP THE DISHES. I'M GOING TO BED.

THAT'S A GOOD BOY.

Laura: MR. EDWARDS DIDN'T WAKE US UP EARLY ENOUGH THAT MORNING,

SO WE WERE LATE GETTING OFF TO SCHOOL.

BUT MR. EDWARDS SAID HE WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO A RESTFUL DAY

WITH JUST HIM AND CARRIE.

[MUTTERING]

AWW...

NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DONE.

THAT'S THE TICKET. YOU JUST STAY RIGHT THERE.

AWw!

OK.

THING I DON'T UNDERSTAND IS HOW YOUR MA GETS ANYTHING DONE.

[WHISTLING]

[EDWARDS CHUCKLES]

[RATTLING]

[BARKING]

CARRIE, STOP!

YOU STAY RIGHT HERE.

WHAT HAVE YOU GOT? WHOA, BOY.

[RATTLING CONTINUES]

THAT OUGHT TO BE ENOUGH FOR 4.

SUPPER'S ON!

COMING.

WHAT'S THAT AWFUL SMELL?

AFRAID THAT'S OUR SUPPER.

PURE NECTAR. HA HA!

[HUMMING]

[RATTLE RATTLE]

JUST ABOUT ON HERE.

SAY, YOU EVER HAD INJUN STEW BEFORE?

Girls: No.

OH, HO! YOU'RE IN FOR A TREAT. COME HERE.

TAKE A WHIFF OF THAT THERE. GO ON.

SIOUX INJUN GAVE ME THAT RECIPE.

OF COURSE, THEN I ADDED A FEW LITTLE SECRET INGREDIENTS OF MY OWN.

BEST THING YOU EVER PUT DOWN YOUR GULLET--

MEANING NO DISRESPECT TO YOUR MA'S COOKING, OF COURSE.

HA HA!

[EDWARDS HUMMING]

GET SOME OF THE CRUST OFF THE BOTTOM THERE.

Woman: ENJOY YOUR MEAL.

Caroline: THANK YOU.

Woman: HERE YOU ARE.

Charles: THANK YOU.

WELL...

YOU REALLY KNOW YOU'RE ON HOLIDAY

WHEN YOU GET WAITED ON LIKE THIS.

I COULD GET SPOILED VERY EASILY.

YOU DESERVE TO BE SPOILED.

MMM-

IT'S AS GOOD AS IT LOOKS.

IT IS GOOD.

YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO AGREE WITH ME.

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SAY IT'S NOT AS GOOD AS MY COOKING.

BUT LYING IS A SIN.

IT'S NOWHERE NEAR AS GOOD AS YOUR COOKING.

HOW MUCH DID IT COST?

DON'T ASK. IT WILL RUIN YOUR APPETITE.

NOTHING COULD.

AREN'T YOU PROUD OF ME? I'M NOT EVEN WORRIED ABOUT THE CHILDREN.

GOOD FOR YOU.

YOU KNOW, AFTER ALL THAT FANCY WRITING ON THE MENU,

I THOUGHT WE'D GET A LOT MORE FOOD THAN THIS.

KIND OF HUMMINGBIRD PORTIONS AT BUFFALO PRICES.

ONE THING ABOUT THE CHILDREN,

THEY WON'T GO HUNGRY.

[HUMMING]

WELL, DON'T WAIT. DIG IN.

COME ON, EAT UP.

[GULP]

GOOD, HUH?

TOLD YOU IT WAS GOOD.

[MARY COUGHING]

GO ON, LAURA. EAT UP.

DON'T BE BASHFUL. JUST DIG RIGHT IN.

PUT HAIR ON YOUR CHEST.

I DON'T THINK I WANT HAIR ON MY CHEST.

Edwards: OH, I FORGOT ABOUT THAT.

WELL, SEE, IT DON'T WORK THAT WAY WITH GIRLS.

THE WAY IT WORKS WITH GIRLS, SEE, IT MAKES THEIR HAIR ALL CURLY.

THAT'S MY GOOD GIRL.

COME ON.

AIN'T THAT GOOD?

HMM?

[JACK WHIMPERS]

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU GIRLS? AIN'T YOU HUNGRY?

WE HAD AN AWFUL BIG LUNCH.

AND MISS BEADLE BROUGHT COOKIES FOR EVERYBODY...

AT RECESS.

[COUGHS]

THIS IS AWFUL GOOD, MR. EDWARDS, BUT WE'RE JUST STUFFED.

OH.

WELL, lT'LL KEEP TILL TOMORROW.

OH, IT WILL?

[RATTLE]

[CARRIE LAUGHING]

COME ON HERE, NOW, OK?

HERE. PUT YOUR HEAD...

NOW, COME ON. LAY DOWN THERE.

HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO GET ANY SLEEP SQUIRMING AROUND LIKE THAT?

YOU TWO STOP STARING AT ME. IT MAKES ME NERVOUS.

Mary: MAYBE YOU BETTER READ TO HER.

READ?

Mary: THAT'S WHAT PA DOES WHEN SHE'S RESTLESS.

Laura: I'LL GET THE THREE BEARS.

SEEMS LIKE A THING LIKE THAT WOULD SPOIL HER.

Mary: SHE USUALLY GOES To SLEEP BEFORE HE'S FINISHED.

Edwards: HERE, LET'S SIT DOWN HERE.

YEP. THERE WE GO. LET'S SEE THAT.

WELL, THAT DON'T LOOK LIKE NOTHING THAT WOULD INTEREST A LITTLE KID.

Laura: SHE LIKES IT.

GO AHEAD.

OH, WELL, UH...

Carrie: READ.

Edwards: UH...

WELL, SIR... SEEMS LIKE THERE WAS THESE 3 BEARS HERE.

Carrie: No, No, No.

THERE WAS, TOO. IT'S RIGHT THERE ON THE COVER.

DON'T YOU SEE THERE? THERE'S 3 BEARS. 1, 2, 3.

ONCE UPON A TIME.

OH! OH, I SEE WHAT YOU MEAN. ALL RIGHTIE.

ONCE UPON A TIME, THERE WAS THESE 3 BEARS.

ONE OF THEM WAS A BIG, MEAN, ORNERY-LOOKING CUSS.

NO, NO, NO.

WHAT, WAS THEY ALL WOMEN?

SHE LIKES IT THE WAY PA READS IT,

NOT WITH THE WORDS CHANGED.

KIDS ARE FUNNY THAT WAY.

OH, WELL, THEN, UH, WHY DON'T YOU READ IT?

LET ME SEE IF YOU KNOW HOW TO READ.

"ONCE UPON A TIME, THERE WAS 3 BEARS WHO LIVED TOGETHER

IN A HOUSE OF THEIR OWN IN A WOOD."

SAY, THAT'S PRETTY GOOD FOR A KID YOUR AGE.

NO, NO. GO ON. SEE IF YOU CAN READ WHAT COMES NEXT.

BET YOU CAN'T. LOOKS LIKE IT GETS HARDER TO ME.

"ONE OF THEM WAS A LITTLE, SMALL, WEE BEAR,

"AND ONE WAS A MIDDLE-SIZED BEAR.

"THE OTHER WAS A GREAT, HUGE BEAR.

"THEY EACH HAD A POT FOR THEIR PORRIDGE--

"A LITTLE POT FOR THE SMALL, WEE BEAR

"AND A MIDDLE- SIZED POT FOR THE MIDDLE BEAR

AND A GREAT POT FOR THE GREAT, HUGE BEAR."

[SNORING]

Carrie: READ!

OH, COMING.

COMING.

CAROLINE... WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

CARRIE. CARRIE'S CRYING.

CAROLINE... WE'RE IN MANKATO.

WHAT?

WE'RE ON OUR SECOND HONEYMOON. WE'RE IN MANKATO.

OH.

WELL, I WAS HAVING A NIGHTMARE.

IT MUST HAVE BEEN ALL THAT RICH FOOD.

DID I AWAKEN YOU?

NO.

OH, GOOD.

[SIGHS]

GOOD NIGHT.

[RAIN FALLING AND EDWARDS SNORING]

[THUNDER]

LAURA?

WHAT?

ARE YOU ASLEEP?

NO.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

NO. WHAT?

MR. EDWARDS DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO READ.

MAYBE THEY DIDN'T HAVE SCHOOL BOOKS

BACK IN THE OLD DAYS WHEN HE WAS A LITTLE BOY.

BUT THEY MUST HAVE.

GEORGE WASHINGTON COULD READ.

[THUNDER]

WE FORGOT TO GATHER THE EGGS.

IT'S RAINING AWFULLY HARD.

IT DOESN'T MATTER.

IF WE LEAVE THEM THERE OVERNIGHT,

ONE OF THE HENS MIGHT SIT ON THEM, AND THEY MIGHT GET BAD.

IF WE SELL BAD EGGS TO MR. OLESON,

HE SELLS THEM TO SOMEBODY ELSE, AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

Mary: OH, I FORGOT. WE AREN'T SUPPOSED To LIGHT MATCHES.

Laura: IT'S AN EMERGENCY.

MAYBE WE OUGHT TO WAKE UP MR. EDWARDS.

NO. HE MIGHT GET MAD.

[HENS CACKLING]

[HENS CACKLING]

[THUNDER]

CHICKEN THIEVES!

THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO HANDLE CHICKEN THIEVES.

[GUNSHOT]

Edwards: WHAT THE--

GET IN HERE!

WHAT...

LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!

NOW, WHAT IN TARNATION ARE YOU TWO DOING OUT THERE

IN THE RAIN GETTING WRINGING WET?

Mary: WE'RE SORRY. WE FORGOT TO GATHER THE EGGS.

OH, YOU DID, HUH? SO YOU GET UP, YOU SNEAK OFF,

YOU LIGHT THE LANTERN-- AND YOU KNOW YOU AIN'T SUPPOSED TO DO THAT.

Laura: WE KNOW, BUT--

BUT YOU DID IT ANYHOW,

SNEAKING AROUND THE MIDDLE OF THE DARK

IN THE RAIN.

DON'T YOU KNOW THAT THERE'S WOLVES PROWLING AROUND OUT THERE?

Mary: IN THE RAIN?

WELL...

HOW AM I GOING TO EXPLAIN THAT TO YOUR MA AND PA?

Laura: Do YOU HAVE To?

IT WOULDN'T BE FAIR AND SQUARE NOT TO.

Mary: WE'RE SORRY. Laura: YES, MR. EDWARDS.

ALL RIGHT, NOW, GET TO BED. HURRY UP, NOW.

GET ON UP THERE.

OHH! MAKE SURE YOU GET DRIED OFF REAL GOOD, NOW.

LORD HAVE MERCY.

Woman: NOW, THAT'S WHAT I CALL FETCHING.

ISN'T THAT FETCHING, MR. INGALLS?

Charles: FETCHING IS EXACTLY THE WORD FOR IT.

Woman: I ESPECIALLY LIKE THE RUCHING, DON'T YOU?

SO STYLISH THIS SEASON.

WELL...

OF COURSE, IT'S NOT VERY PRACTICAL.

IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE.

HOW MUCH IS IT?

Woman: ONLY $2.50, MA'AM.

A REAL BARGAIN.

OH, THAT'S TOO DEAR.

NOW, NO, IT ISN'T. YOU GO AHEAD AND PUT THAT HAT RIGHT BACK ON.

[DOOR OPENS]

YOU WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO HAVE SEEN MONA OR LOUISE, HAVE YOU, JESS?

NOT THIS MORNING, MRS. KIRKWOOD.

HAVE THEY RUN AWAY AGAIN?

YES. WOULDN'T YOU JUST KNOW IT?

WITHOUT AN IF, AND, OR BUT TO THEIR MOTHER.

I'LL KEEP AN EYE OUT.

THANK YOU, AND IF YOU SEE THEM, YOU TELL THEM TO SKEDADDLE ON HOME.

I CERTAINLY WILL.

I HOPE SHE FINDS THEM SOON.

I'M AFRAID SHE WON'T.

THEY'RE DEAD.

BEEN DEAD 'MOST 15 YEARS.

BUT SHE'S LOOKING FOR THEM.

WELL, YOU SEE, SHE WAS AWAY FROM HOME THE DAY THEY WERE KILLED.

IT WAS WARTIME.

MR. KIRKWOOD WAS WITH SHERMAN, MARCHING THROUGH GEORGIA.

ANYHOW, THERE CAME THIS ELECTRICAL STORM,

AND THE KIRKWOOD HOUSE WAS STRUCK-- BURNED TO THE GROUND.

WITH THE CHILDREN IN IT.

SHE HASN'T BEEN RIGHT IN THE HEAD EVER SINCE.

BUT I THOUGHT YOU WANTED THIS LOVELY BONNET.

ANOTHER DAY.

WE'LL BE BACK.

[HAMMERING]

CARRIE?

CARRIE?

WHERE ARE YOU?

CARRIE!

CARRIE?

CARRIE!

CARRIE?

CARRIE?

CARRIE?

UH, CARRIE?

CARRIE!

CARRIE?

CARRIE?

CARRIE?

I'M NOT GOING TO PANIC HERE. THE MAIN THING'S NOT TO PANIC.

NOW, SHE'S NOT IN THE STREAM. WE KNOW THAT.

OH, WHERE COULD THAT LITTLE KID BE?

BOO!

BOO!

BOO!

[HAMMERING]

MARY, LOOK!

MR. EDWARDS, CARRIE SHOULDN'T BE UP THERE!

SHE'S TOO LITTLE. SHE'LL FALL OFF.

WELL, THERE AIN'T NO CHANCE OF THAT.

I GOT HER DRESS NAILED TO THE ROOF.

Caroline: I'D JUST AS SOON HAVE GONE To PRAYER MEETING. IT WOULDN'T HAVE COST ANYTHING.

Charles: THE FELLA AT THE FREIGHT DEPOT

SAID IT'S THE FUNNIEST PLAY HE'S EVER SEEN.

WE NEED LAUGHS MORE THAN WE NEED A PRAYER MEETING TO GET OUR MINDS OFF...

2, PLEASE.

THANK YOU.

Man: ALL SET.

Girl, melodramatically: WHY IS OUR MOMMY GOING To LEAVE US?

DOESN'T SHE KNOW WE NEED HER?

Second girl: I GUESS SHE DOESN'T LOVE US.

First girl: HERE SHE COMES NOW.

MAYBE WE CAN MAKE HER CHANGE HER MIND.

[DOOR OPENS]

Second girl: MOMMY, PLEASE DON'T Go AWAY!

Woman: I MUST. I HAVE MY OWN LIFE To LIVE.

YOUR GRANDMOTHER WILL TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOU.

First girl: BUT WE NEED YOU, MOMMY. WE LOVE YOU.

Woman: YOUR LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH.

I CANNOT WASTE THE BEST YEARS OF MY LIFE

COOPED UP IN A SMALL HOUSE IN THE COUNTRY.

I MUST GO TO THE CITY--

BRIGHT LIGHTS, ADVENTURE.

First girl: YOU PROMISED PAPA YOU'D STAY WITH US.

Second girl: WHEN HE HAD TO GO AWAY TO WAR,

YOU SAID YOU WOULD...

First girl: FOREVER AND EVER!

Second girl: TILL WE GREW UP.

Charles: WE'LL START HOME TOMORROW MORNING.

Woman: I CANNOT STAY ANY LONGER.

[HAMMERING]

THERE. HOW DOES THAT LOOK?

Mary: NOBODY WOULD EVER BE ABLE TO TELL.

I AIN'T GONNA LIE ABOUT THIS, YOU UNDERSTAND.

I MEAN, IF YOUR MA AND PA ASK ME A DIRECT QUESTION--

LIKE IF THEY WAS TO SAY TO ME, "MR. EDWARDS,

DID YOU SHOOT A HOLE IN MY ROOF WHILE WE WAS GONE?"--

I'D OWN RIGHT UP TO IT.

I JUST DON'T SEE NO REASON FOR OPENING THE SUBJECT IF THEY DON'T.

WELL, WHY WOULD THEY ASK YOU ABOUT IT NOW THAT YOU FIXED THE HOLE?

EXACTLY.

YOU DISAPPOINTED?

ABOUT WHAT?

THAT WE'RE GOING HOME SOONER THAN WE PLANNED.

WHY WOULD I BE DISAPPOINTED?

WASN'T EXACTLY A SECOND HONEYMOON, WAS IT?

WHAT'S SO FUNNY?

WELL, CAROLINE... IF OUR FIRST HONEYMOON WAS LIKE THIS ONE,

WE NEVER WOULD HAVE HAD A SECOND HONEYMOON.

I'M SORRY.

DON'T BE SILLY.

WASN'T THAT BAD AT ALL.

THE ONLY THING I'M SORRY ABOUT IS

YOU DIDN'T GO TO THE STORE AND GET THAT BONNET.

I DIDN'T EARN IT.

I TALKED AND WORRIED ABOUT THE CHILDREN THE WHOLE TIME.

[SIGHS]

WELL, TO BE VERY HONEST WITH YOU,

I'M AS ANXIOUS TO GO HOME AND SEE THEM AS YOU ARE.

HERE WE GO, RIGHT ACROSS THE DESERT. WHOOP!

LOOK OUT! HOLD ON TIGHT! HERE WE GO! HO HO!

Mary: HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

LOOK OUT, NOW. THIS CRITTER'S GETTING DANGEROUS. WHOOP!

Laura: LET ME ON! Mary: ME, Too!

Edwards: EVERYBODY ABOARD. ALL RIGHT, THERE WE ARE.

EVERYBODY ON?

OK, READY!

WHAT DO WE SAY? HERE WE GO!

OOH!

OOH!

OH!

OH!

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

IT'S MY BACK. I CAN'T MOVE.

Mary: WE'RE SORRY, MR. EDWARDS. WE DIDN'T MEAN To HURT YOU.

IT AIN'T YOUR FAULT. IT'S THIS DUMB BACK OF MINE.

IT HAPPENED ONCE BEFORE.

SHOULD WE GET DR. BAKER?

NO. THERE AIN'T NOTHIN' HE CAN DO.

WHAT DID YOU DO THE LAST TIME IT HAPPENED?

WELL, AS I RECALL, I CUSSED A LOT.

WE'LL GO OUTSIDE.

NO, NO. IT'S ALL RIGHT.

OH!

OOH!

OH!

OH! GEE, I'M SORRY, GIRLS.

I WAS GOING TO COOK YOU UP A REAL EDWARD SPECIAL TONIGHT.

I DON'T THINK I'M GOING TO BE ABLE TO BEND OVER THE FIRE.

OH, DON'T WORRY. WE'LL COOK SUPPER.

WON'T TASTE AS GOOD, BUT WE WON'T STARVE.

OUGHT TO BE ALL RIGHT BY THE TIME YOUR FOLKS GET BACK.

WOULDN'T WANT THEM TO SEE ME LIKE THIS.

THEY'D THINK THEY LEFT YOU GIRLS IN PRETTY POOR HANDS.

WE'LL GET ALONG FINE.

I'LL TAKE CARE OF CARRIE, AND LAURA CAN DO THE CHORES.

WHY DO I HAVE TO DO THE CHORES?

BECAUSE YOU'RE THE YOUNGEST.

CARRIE'S THE YOUNGEST.

THAT'S SILLY, AND YOU KNOW IT.

[PANS RATTLING] ALL RIGHT, QUIT YOUR SQUABBLING.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE TAKING CARE OF CARRIE.

I WOULD, IF YOU'D STOP ARGUING.

Edwards: NOW, YOU TWO CARRY ON LIKE THIS WHEN YOUR MA'S HERE?

NO, SIR.

NO, SIR.

WELL, I'M YOUR MA NOW, SO STOP IT.

OH...

AH, HELLO, LAURA! OH, I SEE YOU'VE GOT SOME EGGS FOR ME.

ONLY 9 TODAY.

OH, THE HENS TAPERING OFF?

NO. SOME GOT BROKEN THE OTHER NIGHT.

WELL, DID YOU WANT ME TO MARK THESE DOWN,

OR YOU HAVE SOME SHOPPING TO DO?

I GUESS YOU CAN WRITE THEM DOWN. MA WILL BE BACK TOMORROW.

Oleson: WELL, MY, HOW TIME FLIES.

YOU KNOW, IF I DIDN'T KNOW BETTER,

I'D SAY THAT WAS YOUR MA COMING THIS WAY RIGHT NOW.

DON'T LET THEM COME HOME, PLEASE?

WE'RE NOT READY FOR THEM!

KEEP THEM HERE AWHILE, PLEASE?

Oleson: AH! HOW WAS THE TRIP, INGALLS?

Charles: IT WAS GREAT, BUT IT'S GOOD To BE BACK.

I'LL HELP YOU UNLOAD.

I WAS HOPING TO DROP CAROLINE AT HOME FIRST.

UH, I DON'T SEE THE, UH, FLOUR SACKS.

WELL, DON'T WORRY. THEY'RE IN THERE.

THEY'RE DOWN BELOW EVERYTHING.

WHAT, DO YOU NEED THE FLOUR?

OH, I SURE DO.

I GOT A CUSTOMER TAKING OFF FOR DAKOTA TERRITORY.

HE'S REALLY CHAMPING TO GET GOING.

LOOKS LIKE WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO UNLOAD THE WAGON.

WON'T TAKE LONG.

Mary: LAURA!

PUT CARRIE'S CLEAN DRESS ON HER!

COME ON, CARRIE.

HOW YOU FEELING?

OH, NEVER BETTER. NEVER BETTER.

Edwards: OH! THE BROOM! THE BROOM!

Edwards: HA! WE DONE IT.

OOH.

NEAT AS A PIN.

HEY!

HERE THEY COME!

COME ON, CARRIE.

Mary and Laura: MA! PA!

Charles: WHOA!

Charles: THERE THEY ARE!

Caroline, laughing: OH!

HI, CARRIE!

HI, HALF-PINT.

[EVERYONE LAUGHING]

Caroline: LAURA!

Laura: DID YOU GET US A SURPRISE?

Charles: WELL, I THINK WE JUST MIGHT BE ABLE

TO FIND A LITTLE SURPRISE BACK HERE IN THESE BAGS.

GOT TO WAIT TILL WE GO IN THE HOUSE.

HEY, EDWARDS!

HI!

Caroline: WELL, EVERYBODY LOOKS BLOOMING WITH HEALTH.

Edwards: OH, SURE, SURE.

WHAT DID YOU THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN?

WELL, I JUST CAN'T THANK YOU ENOUGH.

OH, WELL, IT WASN'T NOTHING.

THE HOUSE KIND OF RUN ITSELF.

YOU SEE? WHAT DID I TELL YOU?

DIDN'T YOU MISS US JUST A LITTLE BIT?

SURE, MA.

JUST A LITTLE BIT.

COME ON, GIRLS. LET'S GO INSIDE.

I WANT YOU TO TELL ME

ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED WHILE WE WERE AWAY.

AND THANKS AGAIN.

Charles: DON'T WORRY. I'LL BRING THE PRESENTS IN IN A MINUTE.

I KNEW EVERYTHING WAS GOING TO BE ALL RIGHT,

BUT YOU KNOW THE WAY WOMEN ARE--THEY'RE NOT AROUND EVERY MINUTE,

THEY THINK THE ROOF'S GOING TO CAVE IN.

IT WASN'T NOTHING. SAY, HOW WAS THE TRIP?

OH, IT--IT WAS FINE. IT WAS MARVELOUS.

REALLY, I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU.

IT WAS A SECOND HONEYMOON FOR US.

DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT THE KIDS.

OH, GOOD, GOOD.

I'D BETTER BRING THE PRESENTS IN THE HOUSE.

WHY DON'T YOU COME ON IN FOR A MINUTE?

NO, THANK YOU, JUST THE SAME.

WELL, THANKS A LOT.