All language subtitles for Joey - 124 - The Moving In.ENG

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,200 --> 00:00:04,182 Hey, how did it go with Sara? 2 00:00:04,509 --> 00:00:05,328 Did you tell her you love her? 3 00:00:05,614 --> 00:00:07,292 Uh-huh. Then I asked her to move in. 4 00:00:07,783 --> 00:00:09,583 - What? - Surprised? Me, too! 5 00:00:11,179 --> 00:00:12,161 What about me? 6 00:00:12,693 --> 00:00:14,657 Just... if she moves in here, where am I going to go? 7 00:00:14,902 --> 00:00:16,539 I mean, I can't move back in with my mother. 8 00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:18,789 That's true. He can't. I turned his room into a recording studio. 9 00:00:21,735 --> 00:00:22,595 I have dreams. 10 00:00:24,354 --> 00:00:24,804 All right, well, look. 11 00:00:24,845 --> 00:00:26,523 We didn't talk about it but worse comes to worse, 12 00:00:26,604 --> 00:00:29,059 you can stay here with me and my live-in girlfriend in this apartment 13 00:00:29,141 --> 00:00:30,614 that won't stop spinning. 14 00:00:32,742 --> 00:00:33,929 You guys have only been going out a month, 15 00:00:34,051 --> 00:00:35,156 and you asked her to move in with you? 16 00:00:35,238 --> 00:00:37,447 That is a big decision. Seems a little fast to me. 17 00:00:37,816 --> 00:00:40,352 Yeah? You like thinking through life's big decisions, do ya? 18 00:00:44,076 --> 00:00:45,017 You're actually going to go through with this? 19 00:00:45,508 --> 00:00:47,022 Well, I want her to stay, 20 00:00:47,186 --> 00:00:49,109 and moving in is was the only thing I could think of to get her to stay. 21 00:00:49,804 --> 00:00:51,686 And if I'm not totally comfortable with it yet. I'll... I'll... 22 00:00:51,768 --> 00:00:53,037 I'll fake it till I get there. 23 00:00:53,446 --> 00:00:54,510 You really think you can pull that off? 24 00:00:54,632 --> 00:00:56,269 Please. Come on. I'm an actor. 25 00:00:59,379 --> 00:01:00,647 - Hey. - Hey. 26 00:01:01,097 --> 00:01:02,366 I was thinking about going shopping tomorrow. 27 00:01:02,611 --> 00:01:04,207 If we're going to live together, maybe we can get some new things. 28 00:01:04,575 --> 00:01:05,312 What do you think? 29 00:01:05,680 --> 00:01:07,930 That sounds really nice-- buying stuff together. 30 00:01:08,217 --> 00:01:09,117 It's like a whole new start. 31 00:01:14,109 --> 00:01:15,909 Wow. That was some good acting. 32 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:23,074 Everyone is intimidated by a shark. Become a Card Shark AMERICASCARDROOM.COM 33 00:01:25,606 --> 00:01:26,793 - Hey, guys. - Hey. 34 00:01:27,079 --> 00:01:29,207 Hey, something kind of exciting happened yesterday. 35 00:01:29,985 --> 00:01:32,358 - A guy at work asked me out. - Wow. That was quick. 36 00:01:32,562 --> 00:01:35,590 I know. I just started telling people I'm getting divorced, like, two days ago. 37 00:01:35,877 --> 00:01:39,191 And then this guy that I never really even talked to comes up to me... 38 00:01:39,477 --> 00:01:40,705 Ah, the Office Joey. 39 00:01:43,364 --> 00:01:43,978 What? 40 00:01:44,305 --> 00:01:46,883 There's a group of men-- of which I am a proud member-- 41 00:01:47,456 --> 00:01:49,297 whose senses are so finely tuned 42 00:01:49,420 --> 00:01:51,384 that they can entify the need for rebound sex. 43 00:01:54,085 --> 00:01:55,353 And we provide that sex. 44 00:01:57,685 --> 00:01:58,913 I don't think he's that kind of guy. 45 00:01:59,199 --> 00:01:59,813 Oh, really? 46 00:01:59,895 --> 00:02:01,613 Did he offer to help you move furniture now that your husband's gone? 47 00:02:02,022 --> 00:02:03,945 - He did. - Well-played, Office Joey. 48 00:02:05,828 --> 00:02:06,973 So you going to go out with him? 49 00:02:07,219 --> 00:02:09,592 I guess so. Yeah. I'm going to go on my first date. 50 00:02:09,919 --> 00:02:11,106 That's a big step. 51 00:02:11,474 --> 00:02:14,175 Yeah. Speaking of which, I heard about you and Sara. 52 00:02:14,379 --> 00:02:15,198 I know. Huh? 53 00:02:15,525 --> 00:02:18,471 It's a little fast, but I'm really excited to take our relationship to the next level. 54 00:02:19,126 --> 00:02:20,599 - I didn't buy it that time. - Yeah, I may be losing it. 55 00:02:23,708 --> 00:02:26,777 So Seth and I were waiting in line for the opening of the new Star Wars movie, right? 56 00:02:27,104 --> 00:02:30,091 Seth got into a fight... lost our place. 57 00:02:30,746 --> 00:02:31,892 That kid got into a fight? 58 00:02:32,219 --> 00:02:34,592 Yeah. Another person in line also dressed like Princess Leia, 59 00:02:34,715 --> 00:02:36,065 and he, like, considers that his thing. 60 00:02:38,602 --> 00:02:40,320 Look, Michael, if you want, I could call my agent 61 00:02:40,484 --> 00:02:42,489 and see if she could get you into, like, an advance screening. 62 00:02:42,898 --> 00:02:44,289 Oh, my God. That would be incredible. 63 00:02:44,617 --> 00:02:46,131 I mean, I'd be the coolest guy in CalTech. 64 00:02:46,212 --> 00:02:47,522 Except for that guy who can throw a Frisbee. 65 00:02:49,895 --> 00:02:50,591 I'll give Bobbie a call. 66 00:02:50,877 --> 00:02:52,596 Wait. I don't know. I don't like the way she looks at Michael. 67 00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:53,741 How did she look at him? 68 00:02:54,109 --> 00:02:55,787 The way I look at the guy who delivers Joey's water. 69 00:02:56,196 --> 00:02:57,874 - Gina, that guy is filthy. - I know. 70 00:03:05,239 --> 00:03:06,139 Hey, Bobbie, you got a minute? 71 00:03:06,671 --> 00:03:07,939 Oh, good. It's you. 72 00:03:08,430 --> 00:03:11,458 Great news. I got you the cover of Bride magazine. 73 00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:15,509 What? Why? 74 00:03:16,450 --> 00:03:17,759 Is this not Tori Spelling? 75 00:03:21,278 --> 00:03:23,815 - No. It's Joey. - Oh, good. It's you. 76 00:03:26,025 --> 00:03:27,457 Listen. They want you to go in to work today 77 00:03:27,743 --> 00:03:30,444 to shoot a promo for the season finale of Deep Powder. 78 00:03:31,139 --> 00:03:33,512 Today? Why didn't you tell me sooner? 79 00:03:33,799 --> 00:03:34,740 I've been busy. 80 00:03:35,149 --> 00:03:37,768 Some crazy people at work think I have a drinking problem. 81 00:03:39,363 --> 00:03:42,187 I can't go to the bathroom thout them staging an intervention. 82 00:03:43,414 --> 00:03:46,278 And it's killing me, 'cause that's where I do most of my drinking. 83 00:03:48,570 --> 00:03:49,961 Well, look, anyway, 84 00:03:50,084 --> 00:03:52,539 the reason I'm calling is because I need a favor for my nephew. 85 00:03:52,825 --> 00:03:53,889 Really? 86 00:03:55,362 --> 00:03:56,303 Well, put him on. 87 00:03:59,044 --> 00:03:59,863 She wants to talk to you. 88 00:04:03,013 --> 00:04:05,509 - Hello. - Hello, Michael. 89 00:04:07,923 --> 00:04:08,864 Is it time? 90 00:04:10,337 --> 00:04:12,056 No. I'm just actually calling to see 91 00:04:12,138 --> 00:04:15,084 if you could get my friend Seth and I tickets to a Star Wars screening. 92 00:04:15,616 --> 00:04:16,639 Done. But, in return, 93 00:04:17,293 --> 00:04:19,666 I would like pictures of you doing the following things: 94 00:04:22,612 --> 00:04:23,185 Uh-huh. 95 00:04:24,167 --> 00:04:25,804 Uh-huh. 96 00:04:28,136 --> 00:04:28,627 Okay. 97 00:04:30,755 --> 00:04:32,228 This better be one hell of a movie. 98 00:04:39,675 --> 00:04:42,744 Okay, I think we can get some new kitchen utensils, new bath mat... 99 00:04:43,153 --> 00:04:44,871 No, no. That's small stuff. 100 00:04:45,117 --> 00:04:48,431 We need sheets, towels, comforters, matching robes, 101 00:04:48,922 --> 00:04:50,763 some of those really nice wooden hangers. 102 00:04:50,968 --> 00:04:51,868 Oh, hold on a second. 103 00:04:51,909 --> 00:04:54,241 I saw something back there that would be great for us. 104 00:05:04,675 --> 00:05:05,248 Got it. 105 00:05:07,621 --> 00:05:08,808 Joey, this is a baby monitor. 106 00:05:11,631 --> 00:05:12,695 I don't think we're ready for that. 107 00:05:13,390 --> 00:05:14,863 But someday soon. Huh? 108 00:05:26,238 --> 00:05:26,811 You okay? 109 00:05:27,343 --> 00:05:29,389 Yeah. It's just a little hot in here is all. 110 00:05:33,726 --> 00:05:34,462 I guess we're buying that. 111 00:05:37,122 --> 00:05:39,536 Ooh! These would look so nice in the new place. 112 00:05:39,986 --> 00:05:41,746 Oh, are you guys just moving in together, too? 113 00:05:42,237 --> 00:05:42,973 Yes, we are. 114 00:05:44,323 --> 00:05:45,878 Get out while you can! 115 00:05:49,356 --> 00:05:50,052 Can I help you? 116 00:05:50,665 --> 00:05:52,834 Oh yeah, we're, um, we're looking for some new towels. 117 00:05:52,998 --> 00:05:54,307 - We're moving in together. - And I'm excited. 118 00:05:56,762 --> 00:05:57,826 I'd go with these. 119 00:05:58,603 --> 00:06:00,895 They're not cheap, but they'll last you guys forever. 120 00:06:01,508 --> 00:06:03,063 Forever? Well, that's a long time. 121 00:06:04,373 --> 00:06:05,314 You're really gonna love them. 122 00:06:05,436 --> 00:06:07,155 I didn't say I didn't love them! I love them, and that's huge! 123 00:06:08,505 --> 00:06:09,405 Okay, what's going on? 124 00:06:09,528 --> 00:06:10,796 Are you having second thoughts about all this? 125 00:06:11,001 --> 00:06:11,738 No. No. 126 00:06:11,983 --> 00:06:15,215 It's the towels! I'm freaking out about living with these towels! Ew! 127 00:06:18,243 --> 00:06:19,471 You're not talking about the towels, are you? 128 00:06:20,289 --> 00:06:21,189 I knew this was too fast. 129 00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:22,744 Oh, God! 130 00:06:23,522 --> 00:06:24,053 Oh, God! 131 00:06:25,363 --> 00:06:26,672 She's not looking. Run! 132 00:06:37,842 --> 00:06:38,947 How you doing? Feeling any better? 133 00:06:39,234 --> 00:06:42,466 I'm great. Nothing cures a panic attack like 75 mile an hour drive home. 134 00:06:44,635 --> 00:06:46,353 I didn't know you were freaking out about moving in. 135 00:06:46,476 --> 00:06:48,235 I wasn't freaking out until you were freaking out. 136 00:06:48,604 --> 00:06:50,608 What happened? You seemed so sure about it. 137 00:06:50,977 --> 00:06:53,104 - I was acting! - Wow. You're good! 138 00:06:53,677 --> 00:06:57,523 I know! Why do I keep getting jeers in TV Guide?! 139 00:06:59,242 --> 00:07:01,533 It's just so fast! I've never moved in with anyone before. 140 00:07:01,779 --> 00:07:03,538 The longest I ever dated someone was six weeks. 141 00:07:03,866 --> 00:07:05,789 What?! You don't know about relationships either?! 142 00:07:06,116 --> 00:07:09,185 What the hell are we doing here?! Who's flying this plane?! 143 00:07:11,067 --> 00:07:12,253 I was willing to take a chance and do this, 144 00:07:12,335 --> 00:07:13,604 but it scares me that you're so unsure. 145 00:07:13,890 --> 00:07:15,813 One of us has to be certain. 146 00:07:17,082 --> 00:07:17,941 I pick you. 147 00:07:19,987 --> 00:07:20,846 I'm sorry. It's just... 148 00:07:21,460 --> 00:07:23,219 It is... it's just so scary. 149 00:07:23,792 --> 00:07:25,306 I know. 150 00:07:28,211 --> 00:07:29,561 Maybe we shouldn't do this. 151 00:07:31,362 --> 00:07:33,203 I can probably get my job back in D.C. 152 00:07:33,898 --> 00:07:35,126 No, I don't want you to go. 153 00:07:36,599 --> 00:07:37,540 Sara, I love you. 154 00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:39,422 I do. I love you. 155 00:07:41,059 --> 00:07:43,555 And I will stop freaking out. I promise. 156 00:07:45,314 --> 00:07:46,460 Okay. 157 00:07:47,524 --> 00:07:48,629 Then so will I. 158 00:07:50,061 --> 00:07:50,593 Okay. 159 00:07:55,503 --> 00:07:57,630 You know, that's the first time you actually said "I love you" to me. 160 00:07:58,899 --> 00:07:59,512 I did?! 161 00:08:01,435 --> 00:08:02,745 Eh? 162 00:08:05,282 --> 00:08:06,427 Take that, TV Guide. 163 00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:17,107 Hey, Bodie. What's up? 164 00:08:18,048 --> 00:08:18,702 Dude! 165 00:08:19,316 --> 00:08:22,262 I don't know what's going on, but all these extras keep on hitting on me. 166 00:08:22,467 --> 00:08:25,781 Oh. I'm in a committed relationship now, so I've been referring them to you. 167 00:08:26,231 --> 00:08:27,254 Oh, dude! 168 00:08:30,691 --> 00:08:32,573 Okay, guys let's get started. 169 00:08:33,105 --> 00:08:34,578 Well, I haven't seen the script for the promo yet. 170 00:08:35,110 --> 00:08:37,442 Oh, don't worry about it. The whole thing's on cue cards. It's really simple. 171 00:08:41,125 --> 00:08:43,048 Oh, great. Gunnar, you're in this thing, too? 172 00:08:43,211 --> 00:08:44,316 That's right. 173 00:08:44,807 --> 00:08:46,812 You ready for me to put the "pro" in "promo"? 174 00:08:49,308 --> 00:08:50,617 How does he come up with that stuff? 175 00:08:52,459 --> 00:08:54,300 Okay, guys. A couple of takes, then you'll be out of here. 176 00:08:54,709 --> 00:08:55,364 Let's roll it. 177 00:08:55,487 --> 00:08:57,164 Deep Powder promo, take one. 178 00:08:57,737 --> 00:08:58,596 And... action! 179 00:08:59,087 --> 00:09:00,069 Hey, America. 180 00:09:00,151 --> 00:09:02,238 I hoped you enjoyed tonight's exciting Deep Powder finale. 181 00:09:02,647 --> 00:09:05,879 Yeah, now you can shred on over it deeppowdertc.com 182 00:09:06,289 --> 00:09:08,089 Where, for the next three hours, 183 00:09:08,212 --> 00:09:10,339 you can vote for which one of us gets killed off 184 00:09:10,462 --> 00:09:11,608 at the beginning of next season. 185 00:09:12,262 --> 00:09:12,958 Wait. What? 186 00:09:14,431 --> 00:09:15,290 Did you guys know about this? 187 00:09:15,618 --> 00:09:17,091 Yeah. Isn't it a cool contest? 188 00:09:17,868 --> 00:09:20,323 No! They're gonna kill one of us. Why aren't you guys upset?! 189 00:09:20,650 --> 00:09:22,696 I'm so much bigger than this crappy show. 190 00:09:23,228 --> 00:09:25,233 And I'm just really high right now, so... 191 00:09:39,308 --> 00:09:40,945 - Hi. I'm Michael. - Hello, Michael. Alan... 192 00:09:41,191 --> 00:09:43,932 Banderwald. I know who you are. You were assistant editor on Episode II. 193 00:09:46,182 --> 00:09:48,556 Uncomfortable, huh? Yeah, I do that to people. 194 00:09:56,125 --> 00:09:56,984 Seth, where the hell are you? 195 00:09:57,435 --> 00:10:00,831 The movie's about to start, and I'm sitting next to Alan Banderwald! 196 00:10:01,076 --> 00:10:04,145 What do you mean, you never got your ticket? 197 00:10:04,718 --> 00:10:07,623 Then who has it? 198 00:10:09,873 --> 00:10:10,937 Surprise! 199 00:10:14,988 --> 00:10:16,379 They're gonna kill me at work! 200 00:10:16,952 --> 00:10:17,934 Is it 'cause of that chair I stole? 201 00:10:19,652 --> 00:10:20,389 W hat? 202 00:10:20,716 --> 00:10:21,903 I guess not. What are you talking about? 203 00:10:23,171 --> 00:10:24,235 There's gonna be an Internet vote 204 00:10:24,276 --> 00:10:25,994 to see if they're gonna kill me or Gunnar or Bodie. 205 00:10:26,322 --> 00:10:27,549 Oh, no. They can't kill Bodie. 206 00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:33,196 Hey, guys. I just wanted you to check my outfit before my date. 207 00:10:33,687 --> 00:10:35,610 - Wow, Alex! You look great! - Really? 208 00:10:36,019 --> 00:10:39,252 Yeah. Office Joey's gonna be bragging to Office Michael tomorrow. 209 00:10:41,134 --> 00:10:42,770 I haven't been on a date in, like, ten years. 210 00:10:43,630 --> 00:10:45,103 Have the rules changed? What's expected of me? 211 00:10:45,675 --> 00:10:46,289 What do you mean? 212 00:10:46,657 --> 00:10:49,440 Well, I mean, like, do I have to have sex at the end of the night? 213 00:10:49,767 --> 00:10:51,690 Alex, of course not. 214 00:10:51,772 --> 00:10:53,286 You can have it at the beginning. 215 00:10:55,659 --> 00:10:58,482 Don't listen to him. Just do whatever you want. Just have fun. 216 00:10:58,605 --> 00:10:59,792 All right, I'm doing this. 217 00:10:59,914 --> 00:11:03,311 Tonight, I officially start moving on. I'm gonna get wild. 218 00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:06,379 I'm gonna stay out late. I'm gonna put perfume right there. 219 00:11:09,898 --> 00:11:11,494 I'm gonna say it. I'm a little turned on right now. 220 00:11:12,967 --> 00:11:14,113 All right. I'm going to go check in with Sara. 221 00:11:14,767 --> 00:11:15,422 I, uh... 222 00:11:15,872 --> 00:11:18,286 I got her a little present to show her I'm excited about moving in. 223 00:11:18,491 --> 00:11:20,005 Oh, I see what you're doing. 224 00:11:20,127 --> 00:11:21,846 Got a little piece of jewelry hidden in there. 225 00:11:22,132 --> 00:11:23,605 No, no. The towels are the gift. 226 00:11:25,692 --> 00:11:27,574 - It's a symbol. - Of your cheapness? 227 00:11:33,630 --> 00:11:34,326 Hey, Joey. 228 00:11:35,348 --> 00:11:36,003 Oh, hey, Howard. 229 00:11:36,290 --> 00:11:38,417 I just heard about the Deep Powder online voting thing, 230 00:11:38,663 --> 00:11:41,118 and I want you to know I'm going to vote as many times as it takes to save you. 231 00:11:41,281 --> 00:11:43,123 That's really nice, but you're just one person. 232 00:11:43,204 --> 00:11:44,146 It's not going to make a difference. 233 00:11:44,350 --> 00:11:47,746 How do you think Win a Date with Tad Hamilton won the People's Choice Award for best picture? 234 00:11:50,815 --> 00:11:51,715 You did that? 235 00:11:51,797 --> 00:11:54,252 Yeah. I used up all my vacation days, but it got done. 236 00:11:56,257 --> 00:11:59,162 - Thanks, Howard. You're okay. - You're my best friend, too! 237 00:12:02,435 --> 00:12:03,008 Okay. 238 00:12:07,304 --> 00:12:07,877 Sara? 239 00:12:31,650 --> 00:12:33,696 "Joey, i love you but wer'e not ready for this." 240 00:12:34,228 --> 00:12:36,274 "And you're such a good guy, you would have done it anyway." 241 00:12:36,601 --> 00:12:40,324 "I'm sorry, but I thought if I saw you, I'd change my mind. Sara." 242 00:12:41,634 --> 00:12:43,598 Oh, no, this is so sad. 243 00:12:43,843 --> 00:12:45,971 It's like on Deep Powder when Bodie's girlfriend left his... 244 00:12:46,094 --> 00:12:47,280 Enough about Bodie! 245 00:12:50,922 --> 00:12:53,009 I can't believe she left without saying good-bye. 246 00:12:54,031 --> 00:12:55,136 I blew it, Gina. 247 00:12:56,527 --> 00:12:57,509 Oh... you didn't blow it. 248 00:12:58,205 --> 00:12:59,883 You can't help it if you're not ready. 249 00:13:01,233 --> 00:13:02,338 Stupid Newsweek! 250 00:13:02,992 --> 00:13:05,161 Time Magazine, you just got a new subscriber! 251 00:13:07,370 --> 00:13:08,721 - Really? - Well, I'll pick up one copy. 252 00:13:11,544 --> 00:13:13,549 Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. Can I get you a drink? 253 00:13:13,958 --> 00:13:15,063 Yeah, sure. 254 00:13:17,640 --> 00:13:20,300 Jeez, there's no alcohol. What happened here? 255 00:13:20,914 --> 00:13:23,082 You had a Cinco de Mayo party for one. 256 00:13:24,801 --> 00:13:25,578 Ah, si. 257 00:13:28,442 --> 00:13:31,102 Hey, I thought you were at Star Wars. You didn't stay till the end? 258 00:13:33,966 --> 00:13:35,357 Did Bobbie show up? 259 00:13:39,285 --> 00:13:39,776 Okay. 260 00:13:39,981 --> 00:13:41,086 She cannot do this to my son. 261 00:13:41,249 --> 00:13:43,213 I am going to track her down and give her a piece of my mind. 262 00:13:43,704 --> 00:13:45,587 Whoa, whoa, Gina, you're going to embarrass Michael. 263 00:13:46,037 --> 00:13:47,960 He doesn't want you fighting his battles for him. 264 00:13:48,164 --> 00:13:49,760 Check her office. I think she's in her office. 265 00:13:59,826 --> 00:14:01,053 Oh, good. I've got a big problem. 266 00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:04,204 I invited Peter over and now he's in my bathtub naked. 267 00:14:05,963 --> 00:14:09,032 Wow, that was fast. I could learn a thing or two from Office Joey. 268 00:14:10,546 --> 00:14:13,001 No, this is all my fault. I think I may have led him on a little bit. 269 00:14:13,492 --> 00:14:14,842 Alex, don't blame yourself. 270 00:14:15,129 --> 00:14:17,379 I told him to take off all his clothes,get in the tub, 271 00:14:17,665 --> 00:14:20,079 and wait for a long night of passionate lovemaking. 272 00:14:20,530 --> 00:14:21,512 You may share some of the blame. 273 00:14:23,312 --> 00:14:25,317 Yeah, I know, but I was just so excited about moving on. 274 00:14:25,521 --> 00:14:27,772 And I wasn't really into it tonight, 275 00:14:27,895 --> 00:14:30,472 but I just thought that if I kept pushing forward, I would get into it. 276 00:14:31,045 --> 00:14:32,109 You want me to get rid of him? 277 00:14:32,314 --> 00:14:33,991 Oh, that would be great. But we need to do it fast. 278 00:14:34,278 --> 00:14:35,996 Right now I'm supposed to be changing into this. 279 00:14:36,487 --> 00:14:39,842 And it cost me $300 and I don't know which side is the front! 280 00:14:42,052 --> 00:14:43,443 Okay, okay, okay. I'll take care of this. 281 00:14:43,525 --> 00:14:45,612 - What are you gonna do? - I know how he thinks, okay? 282 00:14:45,652 --> 00:14:48,394 Any guy who offers sex to women on the rebound 283 00:14:48,639 --> 00:14:51,667 lives in constant fear of the returning husband. 284 00:14:53,386 --> 00:14:56,454 Honey, I'm back and I want to make this marriage work! 285 00:14:58,664 --> 00:15:00,219 I think I heard him go out the window. 286 00:15:00,301 --> 00:15:01,446 I bet we can see him run down the hill. 287 00:15:04,883 --> 00:15:07,420 Well, he's gonna have to drop that towel if he wants to pick up any speed. 288 00:15:09,548 --> 00:15:10,366 There he goes! 289 00:15:12,576 --> 00:15:15,276 - Thanks, Joey. - No problem. 290 00:15:15,931 --> 00:15:17,527 Can I come over for a little bit? 291 00:15:17,936 --> 00:15:20,350 My apartment smells of bath oil and shame. 292 00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:23,255 Sure. 293 00:15:25,464 --> 00:15:26,692 I was really looking forward to tonight. 294 00:15:26,978 --> 00:15:29,474 I just... I can't believe it ended so badly. 295 00:15:30,047 --> 00:15:32,543 I thought I could just jump right into this dating thing, 296 00:15:32,707 --> 00:15:34,262 but I am way too weird for this. 297 00:15:35,776 --> 00:15:37,044 Hey, Alex... you'll be fine. 298 00:15:37,535 --> 00:15:40,522 Yeah, that's easy for you to say. You and Sara are all happy. 299 00:15:40,849 --> 00:15:41,995 You're going to move in together. 300 00:15:44,368 --> 00:15:46,332 - Sara's gone. - What? 301 00:15:46,823 --> 00:15:49,155 She moved to Washington. We're... over. 302 00:15:51,037 --> 00:15:52,592 No! That's just so... 303 00:15:52,715 --> 00:15:56,398 No, no, no, I'm in a very delicate place right now. No being sad, okay? 304 00:15:58,116 --> 00:15:59,712 I need you to say something to cheer me up. 305 00:16:00,162 --> 00:16:01,799 Okay. 306 00:16:02,167 --> 00:16:05,317 Remember that video of that monkey riding a dog? 307 00:16:15,547 --> 00:16:16,733 That worked. Thanks. 308 00:16:19,434 --> 00:16:20,170 Is there anything I can do? 309 00:16:21,152 --> 00:16:23,034 Well, I wanted a drink, but I don't have any booze. 310 00:16:23,444 --> 00:16:25,899 Oh, I just realized I've got stuff to drink in my room. 311 00:16:26,390 --> 00:16:27,126 Oh, why? 312 00:16:27,412 --> 00:16:29,622 Well, I've got it set up so if there's any item a lady might require, 313 00:16:29,908 --> 00:16:33,059 you know, drinks, extra toothbrush, selections from Oprah's Book Club... 314 00:16:33,468 --> 00:16:36,823 Do you have Waiting to Exhale? 315 00:16:37,478 --> 00:16:40,138 Do I have Waiting to Exhale? Get up there! 316 00:16:44,188 --> 00:16:45,907 Oh, yeah, you were right. 317 00:16:46,357 --> 00:16:50,080 Yes, the intervention was a real eye-opener. 318 00:16:51,717 --> 00:16:54,008 Yeah, I'm calling from the rehab right now. 319 00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:58,387 Mm-hmm. Yeah, I'll see you in 28 days. 320 00:17:00,228 --> 00:17:01,169 Sucka! 321 00:17:06,570 --> 00:17:08,002 Okay, lady, we need to talk. 322 00:17:08,411 --> 00:17:09,925 Excuse me? 323 00:17:10,171 --> 00:17:11,316 I have sat around long enough, 324 00:17:11,398 --> 00:17:14,017 hearing about how you've pawed and threatened my boy. It ends now. 325 00:17:14,549 --> 00:17:15,899 You are way off-base. 326 00:17:16,554 --> 00:17:18,927 First of all, I'm a respectable woman 327 00:17:19,295 --> 00:17:21,873 and I would never be sexually aggressive with a young man. 328 00:17:22,691 --> 00:17:26,251 And second, which one's mother are you? 329 00:17:28,092 --> 00:17:28,788 Michael's. 330 00:17:29,238 --> 00:17:30,343 He's the best one. 331 00:17:32,347 --> 00:17:33,329 Look, I know you're a big shot, 332 00:17:33,493 --> 00:17:35,048 and you probably think I should be afraid of you, 333 00:17:35,130 --> 00:17:36,439 but if you ever bother him again, 334 00:17:36,521 --> 00:17:38,812 I cannot be responsible for what happens to you. 335 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:44,909 I'm not kidding around. 336 00:17:45,236 --> 00:17:46,996 - Listen... - No, you listen. 337 00:17:47,446 --> 00:17:51,578 This is not open for debate. You got that, you crazy-eyed, lunatic-pervert-witch?! 338 00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:57,429 You bother him again, I'll send you back to whatever fairy tale you escaped from. 339 00:17:58,862 --> 00:18:00,866 No one talks to me like that! 340 00:18:04,754 --> 00:18:06,145 Would you like a job? 341 00:18:10,155 --> 00:18:11,587 Another round? 342 00:18:11,709 --> 00:18:12,528 Thanks. 343 00:18:14,492 --> 00:18:17,151 I would like to propose a toast to you, 344 00:18:17,233 --> 00:18:20,097 a bright spot in an otherwise terrible day. 345 00:18:20,588 --> 00:18:21,284 Oh... 346 00:18:21,857 --> 00:18:23,371 And I would like to toast you 347 00:18:23,903 --> 00:18:26,317 for letting me take this necklace out of your lost-and-found. 348 00:18:34,623 --> 00:18:36,628 - This is fun. - Yeah, it really is. 349 00:18:36,914 --> 00:18:40,065 - I'm sad. - Yeah, me, too. 350 00:18:42,847 --> 00:18:44,197 I don't know what the hell I'm doing. 351 00:18:45,016 --> 00:18:46,080 I don't know how to be single. 352 00:18:47,062 --> 00:18:48,657 I don't know how to be not single. 353 00:18:49,885 --> 00:18:51,808 On Monday I have to give a coworker his pants back. 354 00:18:52,094 --> 00:18:55,449 I'll take that over what happened to me-- 355 00:18:55,981 --> 00:18:58,027 my girlfriend left me without saying good-bye. 356 00:18:58,395 --> 00:18:59,377 I'm getting divorced. 357 00:18:59,705 --> 00:19:01,219 I'm never gonna have an adult relationship. 358 00:19:01,505 --> 00:19:02,814 I haven't had sex in three months. 359 00:19:07,765 --> 00:19:09,361 I got nothing that'll top that. 360 00:19:12,143 --> 00:19:14,476 God, this sucks. I hate feeling this way. 361 00:19:14,885 --> 00:19:16,153 Me, too. 362 00:19:16,644 --> 00:19:20,081 Next time I am with someone, I am gonna take it real slow. 363 00:19:20,491 --> 00:19:20,982 Yeah. 364 00:19:21,309 --> 00:19:23,477 And I'm not gonna be with anyone at all for a while. 365 00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:25,278 Smart. 366 00:19:38,576 --> 00:19:40,335 What'd you... what'd you do that for? 367 00:19:41,358 --> 00:19:42,586 I don't know. 368 00:19:59,034 --> 00:19:59,689 Hey, Howard! 369 00:20:00,262 --> 00:20:01,366 How is the online voting coming? 370 00:20:01,612 --> 00:20:02,471 Really good. 371 00:20:02,962 --> 00:20:04,231 The poll is closing in an hour 372 00:20:04,353 --> 00:20:06,235 and I've made sure there's no way Joey's gonna die. 373 00:20:06,808 --> 00:20:07,627 Good work, howard. 374 00:20:10,368 --> 00:20:11,596 Howard, what are you doing? 375 00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:12,987 I'm voting for Joey. 376 00:20:13,191 --> 00:20:14,664 Joey Tribbiani. Submit. 377 00:20:15,155 --> 00:20:16,260 Joey Tribbiani. Submit. 378 00:20:16,260 --> 00:20:20,311 Howard, the question is "Which Deep Powder actor do you think should be killed off?" 379 00:20:21,907 --> 00:20:23,216 Joey Tribbiani. Submit. 380 00:20:23,257 --> 00:20:24,607 Howard! 381 00:20:25,180 --> 00:20:26,776 You're gonna get Joey fired! 382 00:20:27,185 --> 00:20:28,371 How many times did you vote? 383 00:20:28,494 --> 00:20:30,376 7632 times! 384 00:20:31,645 --> 00:20:32,913 I have to undo this! 385 00:20:33,077 --> 00:20:33,936 Gunnar. Submit. Gunnar. Submit. Gunnar. Submit. 386 00:20:34,059 --> 00:20:35,000 Gunnar. Submit. Gunnar. Submit. Gunnar. Submit. 387 00:20:36,305 --> 00:20:42,578 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 29857

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