Original subtitles

ABERDARCY PUBLIC LIBRARY

Good morning. Do you have conditioned reflexes?

Pavlov's.

Yes, it's not available, but...

If you leave your name, I can reserve it for you.

- I'll be back later. - Yes, come back.

- Would you leave your phone number? - I did.

Oh! It really is.

IS SEX NECESSARY?

LIBRARIANS HAVE NOT BEEN OBSERVED TO BE WISER THAN OTHER PEOPLE Ralph Waldo Emerson

Of course, you know why you wake up so early every morning, don't you?

You have a big emotional problem, Lewis.

Yes, it's a well-known biological suit

that some of us need greater flow of creative needs.

In the past, problems could be resolved with a scratch,

without getting stuck in divorce disputes.

What would Romeo do today? He'd probably write

"Worried Teenager, Verona."

I wouldn't bet on him if he tried to climb that pipe.

The damn thing would collapse

before he could reach the window.

A few words on the news and a complex for life.

Which doesn't help him at all.

Look at the wallpaper! Look at those deer!

Three coats of pink, and they're still there.

Probably the painter has a deer herd.

You're as honest as they are, Lewis.

So, what's going to happen, kid? Are you going to do something and regret it

or not do it and be like this every morning?

Hi, honey. Are you awake?

Come on.

You're a good boy.

Honey...

Honey, alarm clock. Don't fall asleep again.

Daddy!

Daddy, wake up!

Dad, it's me, Gwyneth, Dad!

Don't hit Daddy on the head, sweetie.

- Daddy! I want to ask you something! - Don't yell, sweetie.

Dad, aren't you attractive to women?

Good morning, Mr. Davis.

Who let you out? Sammy, Sammy!

Come on, come back, Sammy.

Come back to Mommy and you'll get some nice warm milk.

Letting him go out like that, what could happen!

Come on, Sammy. Come to Mommy.

Come on, my dear. Come to Mommy.

Good boy!

Come in and stay inside!

Damn, I don't know what's wrong with him, I'd stay out there!

Let's see...

Oh, come on, you're not trying!

- You laughed, you know? - What...? - You laughed.

- Who laughed? When? - All night.

I laughed all night? I was up all night!

You know when I I closed my eyes?

At 6:20 a.m. I only slept ten minutes all night.

Damn deer are showing up again.

I'll give you one more hand, we still have paint.

Painting with quicklime is the only solution.

APPLICATION FOR ASSISTANT LIBRARIAN

What's that? A subtle insinuation?

No, I just took it so you don't forget to send it.

I won't forget.

Yes, but it's been on the fireplace for a week.

I know, I put it there.

- Delivery is tomorrow. - Yes...

- You have to be at the post office today. - Yes, that makes sense.

That's why I put it on the table.

Daddy!

- What is love? - Careful! You stepped on Bolk!

- Sorry, Bolk. - Don't cry, Bolk.

He saw. It's okay now.

Dry your tears and drink your coffee

like a good boy.

Aren't you going to change your mind again? Are you going to run for office?

- Jean, not again. - I know we've been through this before,

I know you have little chance, others have much more.

To say the least. My problem is that

I'm not a great connoisseur of Welsh literature.

At least sign up, you'll have a chance to convince the Council.

And I get a Welsh egg in my face? My pride couldn't take it.

- What is this? - Get a tissue.

An extra �150 a year would make a difference.

Jean, you don't need to convince me, I know it would make a difference.

But I'm realistic, I don't live in the clouds.

No, he lives in three bedrooms, a living room, a bathroom, and a roof with deer.

- Daddy? - What's wrong, love?

Bolk doesn't like you he just told me.

Really? I'm going now.

- It doesn't hurt to send it. - I thought about sending it...

I think you have a chance, I really do.

- The deer's days are numbered. - I sincerely hope so.

Bye, Freddie. Bye-bye, love.

Bye, Gwyneth.

Bye-bye, sweetie.

- Bad breath, Daddy. - Oh, thanks.

You forgot Bolk.

Bye, Bolkie.

You don't have to kiss him, he knows you don't appreciate him.

He's a good observer.

No, no! He's upside down!

- What else should I do? - To work...

- Bye, John! - Bye, honey.

Sammy, your dad's waiting for breakfast!

Sammy, who's bothering you again?

Do you know it's a crime to leave a puppy outside without a leash, Mrs. Davis?

What? Leave it on the street? I took it inside.

Come on, kid. It's your birthday.

That's it.

Good morning, leuan!

- Good morning, John. How's the family? - Great.

Megan isn't well. Very sick this morning.

You barely lifted your pretty head from the pillow. God, the bus!

Sorry.

- Do you know why she's like this? - Why?

- To the center. - It's three shillings.

Anyone else?

Me too.

- I can't reach there. - Help, John?

- Thank you, sir. - You know, this thing with Megan...

It's bad because she's worried about my chances.

- What are my chances? - Of getting the job.

The librarian assistant position.

Oh, yes.

Careful...

I don't want to bother you, but... Megan is very persistent.

She's obsessed with this. I'm just going to calm her down.

Are you going to sign up too?

- Yes, I thought, for fun. - For fun?

No, not for fun, just for fun.

Anyway, this shouldn't worry you, leuan.

No, seriously, in the end, it's your life and you need to live it.

Leuan, have you thought about other things? For example, women?

Women? - Yes. Women, except Megan.

- Except Megan? - Forget it, I just thought.

Oh God! I have to get Megan's medicine at the pharmacy.

- All right, leuan. - See you later.

Good morning.

Hello, Mr. Lewis, me again. Are you happy to see me so soon?

- I'm one of your best customers. - Almost, Mr. Hyman.

Don't call me that, I have a name. You must have seen it in the letters.

Do you have any more books like that?

Well, not really, Mr. Hyman. Not with so many egg stains.

- I enjoyed reading it. - Yes, you can see that.

You owe a shilling for being three weeks late.

What the hell are you doing!

- Will you wait for me, dear? - I'm already late...

I won't be long. I can't go in with Scampi.

- Are you busy? - No, except going to work...

So, nothing serious.

Someone could see us, see me!

What's up, dear? It's broad daylight, you're dressed, there's no crime.

No, of course not. Okay then.

Don't take long!

I'd like something like that too! It looks vulgar!

- What's vulgar? - The car, silly!

- What a question! - A shilling, please, sir, Hyman.

Never mind, it's not much for a book like that.

Good morning! Could you help me?

I really liked it, you know.

They lived happily ever after, and that doesn't happen often.

I hate it when they have to suffer for their sins...

- Maybe you have something else? - Like this?

- Yes, exactly. - I could take a look.

- I think that's a great idea. - You mean now?

Yes, better now.

- Is there a problem, Miss Jones? - Yes, are you looking for something...

- Maybe I can help? - It's probably something simple.

Yes. Miss Jones, if you'll serve that gentleman, I'll take care of it.

I apologize. I can't talk about this with girls.

- What's the problem? - I need a book.

Or books on the history of customs in medieval Wales.

If possible with color illustrations.

I'm creating costumes for the next Darcy Players performance.

Perhaps you have any suggestions, sir...

Lewis.

Do you have any suggestions, sir. Lewis?

If you weren't perhaps "THE" Mr. Lewis?

Who is "THE" Mr. Lewis?

John Lewis, theater critic of the Aberdarcy Chronicles?

That's a bit of an exaggeration.

I write about operettas and club pantomimes

and these things aren't very serious.

But the Darcy Players are afraid of what you'll write.

I'm Elizabeth Griffith Williams. You know my husband, don't you?

No, I haven't had that pleasure.

Well, Mrs. Griffith Williams, if you'll walk with me through the shelves,

I'm sure we'll have a solution to your problem.

We don't have much choice, I'm afraid

most of the good books are gone.

How about "Memoirs of a Welsh Hatter"?

With the author's signature and in excellent condition?

What we have here...

"A Brief History of Genital Coverings."

A very interesting book.

Wouldn't do for Darcy's Players. What illustrations!

A very popular book, in its own way.

Yes, a very popular book in its own way.

Yes..."Property and Morality in Welsh Costume."

This might be what you're looking for.

- "Morality in Welsh Dress." - It has an interesting story.

You just came off the 1959 banned books list

and since then no one has looked for you.

Really? No, I don't think so.

- I'm afraid that's all there is to it. - We didn't get much, did we?

No, we really don't...

You should talk to our Mr. Jenkins.

He's the expert here on all things Welsh.

He could probably ...around here.

He could help you.

Leuan, Mrs. Griffith Williams desperately needs a favor.

Mrs. Williams, I'm leaving her in good hands.

- Is this Mrs. Griffith Williams? - Exactly.

Mr. Lewis, may I borrow this one?

Property and Morality in Welsh Dress? Yes, you can.

- Pages 28 to 34, Mr. Hyman. - Thank you.

- You know what they say? - No, what do they say?

A page a day keeps the shrink away.

Of course, Mrs. Griffith Williams, you can count on us.

Thank you.

I think I gave you everything, including address and phone number.

They're not in the phone book.

Of course, Mrs. Griffith Williams, I'll get to work right away.

It's very important, as Mr. Lewis noticed.

Of course, Mrs. Griffith Williams. Thank you.

Thank you too, John. How is your wife?

Very well, thank you, leuan, and also the two children.

Okay, okay... Thank you again, Mrs. Griffith Williams.

You're welcome, you've been very helpful.

Speaking of which, you need to come to one of my literary evenings.

Thank you, thank you, Mrs. Griffith Williams.

Do you know who she is, John? Mrs. Griffith Williams?

You're joking.

Her husband is on the Council. They were married during the war.

- She came with the Free Norwegians. - Really?

A very, very powerful man, Mr. Griffith Williams.

One of those, isn't it?

President of the Library Board.

I was especially delicate, I can tell you.

You didn't grovel, did you?

I wonder if she really invited us.

Well, anything's possible, isn't it?

Look at that now!

That's when you're influential...

Yes. And a good pair of breasts helps, you know.

Sometimes you're too simple, John.

Mr. And Mrs. Griffith Williams - Invitation -

I don't understand why they invited us. Did you meet her at the library?

- Yes, my clean tissues? - I'll get them in a moment.

You mean, she came into the library and invited you?

No, of course not. She was looking for unusual books, and I helped her.

- Where did you say they were? - I said I'll get them in a moment.

I just wanted to know why they invited us.

Yes, it's weird, isn't it?

Daddy!

Will you go out and leave us alone?

No, honey. Aunt Megan Jenkins will take care of you.

Bolk doesn't like her. She kisses him and has facial hair.

Bolk will be asleep when she arrives.

No, he said he'd stay up all night.

Gwyneth? Is that you? Close your eyes and sleep, I don't want to hear a peep.

There, honey, I already put her to bed.

They're not there, I looked.

Be careful how you use them, they're full of holes.

When are Yeuan and Megan coming?

At 8:15. But she's always late, you know.

Fasten it in the back.

- Is there a hook on top? - Of course.

- It still seems strange to me. - What?

- This party. For what benefit?

If you don't stay quiet, I won't be able to button it.

An amateur theater group.

- What does she look like? Middle-aged? - Yes, you could say.

- Attractive? - Yes, attractive in a way.

Your husband is president of the Council, didn't I tell you?

- No, you forgot. - But it is, anyway.

- Does the dress look good? - Yes, love. Wonderful.

- Did you redo it? - I increased the neckline a bit.

- Not much, I think. - As long as it stays like this.

I hope. I pinned it to my bra.

And remember, stay with me. Don't get lost like usual.

- When did I do this? - Last time.

You look handsome. You look younger tonight.

Well... I'm younger tonight.

That must be Megan. You open it, I'll look after the children.

# I'm young tonight, # # So young tonight... #

It's okay, Mrs. Davis! It's a friend!

Disturbing the dog so late...!

- Hi, leuan. Want to come up? - No, John, thanks.

I have very little time.

Did something happen?

Yes, I'm afraid you're going to be disappointed tonight, John.

- Something wrong with Megan? - Yes, same as always.

Migraine. Fortunately, a milder attack this time.

But babysitting is out of the question.

- I can't leave her. - What can you do.

Well, good night, John. See you in the morning.

- Say hello to Megan. - Thank you. Good night.

What happened?

Ruin!

Megan did as usual.

So that's it.

Well, I don't know about you, love, but I'm in a really good mood!

A good night at home, nothing could be better.

Lewis at home, a special article from Home and Garden magazine.

"Oh, yes, we always dress for dinner."

- "Really?" - "Yes, always."

- "Why?" - "See, it gives it a special flavor."

"Heinz sauce on the fireplace."

"Their living room is painted a modern, sickly green."

Honey, I know it's boring but it's not the end of the world, is it?

No, it's not the end of the world, I'm sure of it.

- We should inform them. Or her. - Who?

The attractive Mrs. Big Mouth.

- Why? - Out of politeness.

- All right, who... - Listen!

I have an idea. Call them and

buy a bottle of wine and fries on the way back,

drink and listen to the radio. I'll pay, go.

You've become generous in your old age.

- Leaving, Mr. Lewis? - Good observation, Mrs. Davis.

Do you leave the children alone?

Yes, I put the heater next to the cribs and lit the wick.

You don't take good care of your children, do you, Mr. Lewis?

Now I have to keep drinking, Mrs. Davis.

I enjoyed our little chat.

- I should report him! - Good year for that, Mrs. Davis!

Come in, Edna and close that door.

- Excuse me... - Good evening, Mr. Lewis.

It's a good evening, isn't it?

You can't escape this, poor thing.

I'm sorry, Lewis. I really feel sorry for you.

Your fate is sealed. You're suffocating.

There's no point in pretending, instinct diminishes with age.

Face it: You're not getting out.

Call, apologize to the sexy Mrs. Griffith Williams.

And drown it all in wine and fries.

And good luck to you!

- The dress has a deep neckline. - Then don't look.

Don't look? That's the only pleasure I have left.

Family happiness in the clerk's house.

Last night, interviewee Mr. John Lewis,

a librarian who changes his shirt twice a week,

expressed deep dissatisfaction with his lot.

What are we doing, Jean?

I mean, what are we doing besides waiting

for this suit to come back into style?

- No, seriously. - I know you're serious.

Look at me! Drinking here like a bum

as if I were a or street sweeper.

Why did I bother taking the exams?

Where did that get me?

I'd be much better off as a street sweeper.

No doubt! You'd be better off being a street cleaner!

I know how you feel. But I think you'll get this job.

If there's any justice, you'll get it.

There's no justice inside or outside the Aberdarcy Public Library!

If that Mrs. Williams is what you say...

What do I say she is?

No matter, she invited us to a party tonight.

Of course, no party is complete without us.

People call me just to know who my tailor is.

I thought... pass the potatoes, maybe she'll go back to the library.

If her husband is so influential on the Council,

she'll probably tell him about you.

You can charm her.

You can charm a bird on a branch, if you want.

As long as they're not in a bad mood.

Let's bet they're Jehovah's Witnesses?

Not this time of year. It must be for some petition.

They know where to go.

Tommy, be quiet!

...an offer from Mrs. Griffith Williams.

I'm surprised, I don't know what to say...

- Something wrong, dear? - No, no...

Would you excuse me for a moment?

What did he say?

What's going on?

Mrs. Griffith sent someone to babysit

the kids so we can go to the party.

- Who? - I don't know.

He doesn't seem very happy, but I'd say he knows kids.

- Does he have a pretty face? - Yes, I'd say so...

He doesn't look like someone who secretly swallows opium.

What do you think? To keep them up for an hour?

- Okay, she usually doesn't wake up. - No, no!

I don't know the guy's last name.

Will you come up here for a moment, Mr. Bill?

Bill, this is my wife, Jean. Jean, this is Bill.

How are you? - Kind of you to come...

Yes, you left the party...

And, yes... Jean will show you where they are.

We won't be long, just to show up.

That's right, we won't stay long, come with me.

I'll show you where the kitchen is, this way...

I don't think they'll give you any trouble.

That would be unusual. They're usually good.

But, Bill, there's still half a bottle left...

Tea. If you'd like...

- Yes, thank you. - Have some tea.

- Tea? - Tea.

- Bye! - See you later.

Daddy! Bolk is still awake!

- Good evening, you made it! - Yes, thanks to you.

This is my wife, Jean. Mrs. Griffith Williams.

Jean, that's great! Did you make it okay?

- Yes. Sorry for the inconvenience. - Oh, it was nothing.

- Do you want to get ready? - That would be great.

Your dress is beautiful. You can use the bathroom over there.

- Thank you. - Oh, no! Wait a minute.

Someone is sick in that bathroom.

Go upstairs to mine. Second door on the right.

- Will you wait for me there, love? - Yes, love, I'll be here.

Okay.

- What did you think of old Bill? - You seem like a nice guy!

Not bad, huh? For a last year's model.

Try the caviar.

Oh! Thank you very much!

I've never had caviar.

It's worth trying.

Yes, I try everything, once.

Once?

I shouldn't keep you all to myself.

Let me introduce you...

Grab a drink, you have someone you need to meet.

I'd like to meet your husband.

He's around. First, meet our writer.

- That's some whiskey. - Yes, thank you.

Where's the bard?

I was flirting with the idea of translating Kafka into Welsh,

but how to translate the values...

Honey, stop being brilliant for a moment

and come meet a newcomer.

- Understand? - Yes, I do.

A true white-collar.

How are you, Lewis, still delivering garbage to the masses?

Yes, that's right. And you, still writing garbage?

- Do you know each other? - Yes, it's been a long time.

We played marbles together.

- You never told me. - No, of course, he's very modest.

If you're anything, you're not a name, right, Gareth?

And Mrs. Lewis?

Yes, he's known her too. Also for a long time.

Hi, Gareth.

Hi Jean.

Just like old times, right?

A lot of time has passed since our wedding.

You're thinking about what happened

the last time we met?

- No, it was good, you said... - John!

"The best doesn't always win." Very original. It stuck with me.

Do you think you're funny?

Does anyone else want a drink? I'm sure you do.

I was leafing through your novel the other day, "The Grass Is Nourished."

We have an unsigned first edition; I think it's rare.

Will you come to the premiere of my play, Jean?

I'd love to, but it's hard for me.

- But John will, won't he, love? - Oh, yes, yes...

Of course, since I don't have to pay the admission fee, what's the name of the play?

"Bouen Thomas, Tailor of Handajl."

What a remarkable title. I wonder no one has used it before. Is it a comedy?

Here we are! Vernon, this is Mr. And Mrs. Lewis. My husband.

- Good evening. - How are you?

We were talking about Gareth's new play.

We're way behind with the costumes.

I'm sorry to hear that. What's the problem?

Nothing's been done.

Elizabeth has been trying for a month to get Mr. Lewis's library

to get books that might help us, but, of course, without success.

Jean, someone is dying to meet you.

If we knew what you were looking for, we could help.

It's hard to find a book without knowing either the title or the author.

Hell, man, it's your job! Do we have to do this for you?

- Don't be hard on him. - Why not?

You know how they are.

Poets, I think that gives you the right to be different. No?

As a theater critic for the Aberdarcy Chronicles, I must agree.

Still, in my personal opinion,

he's a conceited, small, and stupid four-eye. Sorry.

Charming!

Excuse me, where is their bathroom here?

Where can a man wash his hands here?

That door over there.

Sir, very good...

Sorry.

Very funny!

- A cigarette? - No, thank you.

- It's the original. - Really?

- Do you like it? - It's not bad.

You should buy one of that French one.

Yes, I saw pictures in a magazine the other day. It looks great.

- Really? Interesting. - Yes, he...

- Do you want one of mine? - Oh, thanks!

You know, you lay the canvas on the floor,

spill a bunch of paint

and drag a naked woman across the canvas.

I'd like a job like that, I'd love to wash the brushes.

Tell me something...

I was wondering if you're a candidate for that position at the library.

- I've been thinking about it, yes. - You know, I think you should.

I think you have a chance, Vernon is on the Board.

Vernon? Vernon, your husband?

I don't interfere much, but sometimes he asks me for advice.

- And you give it? - Sometimes. It depends...

I understand.

I think I can help them find the kind of man they need.

Talking to the Council is very important.

Yes, first impression...

- Yes, that counts. - Yes, of course.

What kind of man are they looking for?

Actually, I don't know, maybe someone who looks like you?

What would you do... if I kissed you?

Nothing violent, I hope?

- Violent? - I'd like to kiss you.

Because I personally believe very much in first impressions.

Buy new tissues before the interview.

Do you think I'll make it to the interview?

I think you'll go much further.

Is someone there dead or what?

Leuan! Well, congratulations.

John, there you are...

Look, I'm afraid I'm very sick.

Yes, there's a reason for that, isn't there?

- It runs in the family. - Look, Megan...

Thank you very much.

I'll wait for the gentleman.

- Yes, I'll send you down. - Thank you, good night.

- Do we need to give him something? - No, no!

Did Mrs. Griffith Williams offer to help him?

Yes, yes.

I told you to sign up. Are you happy you signed up?

Sure, sure.

Quiet, Sammy! There are people trying to sleep in here!

Hi, Bill! How was it?

Didn't the kids cause any trouble?

- No, no, they behaved. - Good.

- Except... Bolk. - Yes?

I had to take him to the bathroom seven times.

Can you catch the ball?

The ball!

I see you're winning!

Hello!

Thank you, sir!

Lucky my brakes are working!

Yeah, thank goodness, right?

I was just... heading home.

I noticed. Can I drive you?

- Wonderful. Thank you. - Good. Jump in.

Oh, I was thinking, could we have a drink tonight?

That's very kind of you, but...

It's illegal to leave children unattended at night.

I'm afraid Bill can't this time.

How do you deal with them otherwise?

You need a system!

Oh, we do. It consists of this: Most of the time we don't go out.

I'll talk to Jean.

Who is it? Who's coming in? - Just me and a friend, Mrs. Davis.

- Is this Mr. Lewis? A visitor? - That's right, Mrs. Davis.

- I don't like noise, Mr. Lewis! - Neither do I, Mrs. Davis.

- Nice here. - Yes.

Jean, honey... are you busy?

We have... a visitor.

Hello, Jean! I ran into your husband on the street.

Sorry, the apartment is a mess, we weren't expecting company.

It's okay.

We're going out for drinks tonight, would you like to come along?

I heard from John that you have a babysitting problem.

I'm afraid so. Anyway, I...

- I really don't think I can. - Too bad...

I told you it might be difficult.

You go, love, if you want.

And why don't you go and I'll stay with the kids?

No, I'd rather you go.

God, I feel uncomfortable, it feels like I kidnapped your husband.

Don't worry about me.

We need to meet up alone, gossip about guys a little.

Yes, I'd be happy. We need to do that.

What a sweet girl! What's your name?

- The cat got your tongue. - No!

Bolk doesn't want me to tell my name to other people.

- Who's Bolk? - I'll tell you all about Bolk later.

- Are you sure? - I'm sure. Have fun!

Bye, love.

Bye, Gwyneth.

Fred...

Bye, Jean. Don't forget our agreement.

I won't forget.

I'll leave some food for you.

Cold.

Mom, Bolk doesn't like her.

Hush, love. I'll dry your hair.

- Which pub are we going to? - I don't know, dear.

Let's go to the Queen's Head for a drink. And then home.

For a change.

- Are the employees off? - Yes.

- Vernon isn't here either. - Really?

Yes, he's, more or less, on duty, right?

Can you get us a drink while I change?

Yes, yes.

- Inside and take it upstairs. - Inside? - Yes.

I'll have a gin and tonic. And cigarettes.

- How will I find you? - I'll leave a trail.

POINT OF NO RETURN

- Here! Anyone for tennis? - Go on. I'm in the room.

Put the drink near the bathtub. Make yourself at home.

I'll be with you soon.

What are you doing there?

- You're very quiet. - Yes, I've always been very quiet.

Quiet since I was a child.

What do you think of the gym?

It's impressive.

He'll get hurt one day, it won't be what he aspired to.

Sorry it took so long. I don't know what to wear.

Don't worry about me, take your time. I can wait.

- See what I mean? - Yes.

Strange that old Vernon buys something like that. It's deadly.

It was a gift I gave him.

- Light my cigarette, dear? - Yes.

I first saw this when Paul Henreid did it for Beth Davis

in the movie "The Strange Passenger."

I only remember a handsome major, in the war, in the middle of winter.

He was shot and bled profusely.

When was that?

1942... The major wanted to marry me.

- I loved the war. Does that scare you? - No, not particularly.

I enjoyed every moment of the war, I cried when it was over.

I should have married that major. But I didn't.

I heard something about that terrible interview with the Council.

You're on the list of the four selected, are you satisfied?

- Are you grateful? - Yes, I am.

How grateful?

- I want you. I want all of you. - Yes, love.

But don't you think it would be better to leave this gym?

- I want all of you. - And you're going to have me, darling...

but can we go to the bedroom?

Carry me.

Carry me.

- Honey... - Yes?

Honey, leave it now!

- Oh God! - What happened?

It's Vernon! Get up quickly!

It's going to be unpleasant! Where are you?

What are you doing? Silly, get out of my closet!

- Where should I go? - I don't know!

Put on your jacket!

Grab the sleeve, the sleeve!

Stop panting! Take a deep breath.

Push your head between your legs. I'll stay with Vernon.

- Should I stay here or what? - No! In the bathroom!

What now?

- I know what. - What?

- Pick them up off the floor. - Why?

If anyone comes, they won't be surprised.

Isn't that weird?

- Everything seems weird! - All right...

Better than nothing.

- It's important that you do something. - All right.

- Let's go! - I'm doing my best.

- Is that you, honey?

You care too much about that contract, Billy.

It's practically signed.

- Where are you going, Charlie? - To get ice.

Second door.

- Honeyeeee! - Hi, love.

Councilmates for a drink. Do you want to join?

I'll see, dear. I was thinking about going to bed early.

Okay, whatever you say.

Where's Harry? If you want ice, you'll have to wait for Charlie.

Don't panic. He came for a drink with the boys.

And now, should I go down and offer them cigarettes?

No, dear.

In this situation, it's recommended to sneak out.

- You're right. - No, not that way!

Don't worry. Give me a kiss goodnight.

Wait, look...

Not now.

You're nervous, I wish you'd relax a little.

- Yeah, I think so. - Me too. Come now.

Which way should I go?

Through the main entrance, I think. Be careful at the bottom of the stairs.

- Through the main entrance... - Be careful going down, remember.

- He seems a little grumpy. - Yeah.

- So... I'll see you again? - Yeah, soon. I'll be alone.

Cigarettes...

Mr. Griffith Williams is in the living room.

Thank you very much.

- Yes? - Oh, good night.

Just... I'll check if everything's okay.

I only leave a job when everything is okay.

- Everything's okay, as far as you know? - I think so.

Pipes and stuff? I don't want anything to leak.

Great. You won't have any more problems. Good thing I stopped by, huh?

Well, good night!

Nice and cozy! It's warm...

It's warm, yes. Don't worry. The heat will pull everything back.

Hello, leuan. - Sorry, John.

- Last minute. - Ticket!

- Don't you have any change? - No.

- Then you'll have to wait for the change. - To the center, thank you.

"Bouen Thomas Tailor of Llandilo."

Do you read for pleasure? - Yes. It gives me great pleasure.

Actually, John, I'm honored, I've been offered a role.

- Who offered it? - The writer himself, Mr. Probert.

Well, it couldn't have come from a higher place.

What role did he offer?

The role of death.

Thank you.

Your change... sir.

Take a chance, kid. I think she knows you're an actor, leuan.

Really, John?

Yes. She knows all about the kiss of death.

And try, for God's sake, honey, to act professional.

- I'm not a professional, I'm an amateur! - You can act. Convince yourself!

It's very late, very late! Turn that off!

- Hello. - Ah... hello!

- Surprised? - Yes, very much.

- The curtain goes up in one minute. - No, not yet!

Very good. Put that bag away!

Hold on tight, it's not your ukulele! Where is death? The curtain rises!

I'm here, Mr. Probert! But my leg's stuck!

- His knee's locked. - Stuck, Mr. Probert, stuck!

- How about some lubrication? - I'll get the wrench.

Don't go! Wait, Mr. Probert, I'm tied up!

Play the pianos again and don't turn off the lights!

Too late, they're already off.

Play it again!

Play it again!

Oh my God... I'm going to see what's going on. Excuse me.

Yes.

It's no use, Mr. Probert. You're still stuck.

You could stand up if you tried, I'll never forgive you for that!

Shall we postpone the prologue and make it an epilogue?

This isn't the BBC!

No matter where the play begins, it always happens in the movies.

- What happened? - I don't know. It's a mess there.

We need to find something more interesting.

Okay... but I need to write a review of the play.

That's easy. No plot, no action, and no point.

It's one of Probert's best.

Just mention the cast and who designed the costumes. Let's go.

- Quiet, let's get you on stage. - Don't leave me, Mr. Probert!

- Raise my visor! - Light that damn torch!

I forgot the text! What should I say?

"Your death is coming!" Speak loudly. Stand back!

Get out! The curtain is rising!

Your death is coming!

They should have used you in the tank battalion.

They did.

Well, Mr. Lewis...

Well, Mrs. Griffith Williams...

- We have unfinished business, don't we? - Yes, Mrs. Griffith Williams.

- Let me put you out of your misery. - Any time.

About the position...

Vernon got the information.

You just need to make sure you don't embarrass yourself in front of the committee,

- next week. - I'll do my best...

All right.

Are you satisfied?

Yes.

Will I get something in return for the good news?

Do you think a sincere thank you will suffice?

Hardly.

What are you doing? - I'm trying to take off my shoes.

Leave it.

Surprise!

- Is that enough? - One more time, dear!

- What is this? - Close the window!

Close the window!

- What? - The button!

Don't panic! They're just cows.

Which button?

What are you doing? - I'm trying...

I do my best. I don't know which button...

Turn off the radio!

How can a normal person deal with this?

- Let's get back on the road. - Turn off the radio!

It can be done later!

Leave the cows alone! What are you doing there?

Was that a gunshot?

Rifle shot. Let's get out of here!

- You better turn off your headlights. - I can't drive without lights!

Careful!

Well, Mrs. Griffith Williams... - Well, Sir Lewis...

Looks like we're out of luck, huh?

Nothing a good mechanic can't fix.

Too bad you have to write this review now.

Don't worry. I'll scribble it on Jim's bar and hand it in on the way home.

Don't forget, mention all the actors. And the costumes.

Don't worry, you're all on schedule.

Honey...

- I need to see you soon. - Yes.

Aren't we pushing anything?

- Soon... Don't forget. - No.

Well... drive carefully.

And... drive carefully.

I've been waiting a long time, sir. Lewis!

I'm sorry. This wasn't easy to write.

Okay, I'll keep working.

GREAT JOB BY THE ACTORS WONDERFUL COSTUMES

- Daddy! - Yes, love?

Did you say good morning to Bolk?

No, I forgot.

It's okay, he doesn't want anyone talking to him.

- He says he's going crazy. - Why?

Worried! He's worried about the bomb.

Gwyneth, hurry up, I took out all the bones.

I see you wrote a good review.

Yes... I think so, I didn't mean to be too rude.

Very noble of you, given the circumstances.

What circumstances?

THEATER CATCHED FIRE DURING THE SHOW

- And you? Stomach ache again? - No.

- But... I thought a lot, that's all. - About what?

About you and me, to tell you the truth,

deep down, we're both corrupt.

Really? No more than normal, I hope.

I'm not sure I understand.

Your friendship with Griffith Williams.

Don't deny it because I know it's true!

And I don't judge you because I have my own shame.

What do I have to do with theater? What good has it done me?

I'm just a laughingstock. I set fire to the theater...

Well, if it'll help you feel better,

tea is now served by at least the former critic of the Aberdarcy Chronicles.

And what I did to you that night at the party!

What made us act like this?

This damn job! Trying to get a promotion!

I joined the theater just to meet the right people

who would speak well of me.

The fact is, these are not our people, or we are not theirs.

In any case, we won't get promotions.

Price...

The price is too high.

Sorry.

Are you coming? There's a good show on TV.

When I'm done, I'm going to bed.

I'll tell you about last night. I'm not trying to avoid this.

Hand me that cloth.

Sorry, I'll dry it.

I saw Mrs. Griffith Williams at the theater. Only...

it was so bad we left before the end, before the fire.

She wanted to talk about the position.

Your husband's word is decisive on the Council.

- That's good news, isn't it? - Yes, very good.

- You don't seem very pleased. - I will be when I get used to it.

- Getting used to what? - That you're having an affair.

- Jean... - No, I don't want that!

I'm not having an affair with Mrs. Griffith Williams like you think.

Great! Then we don't have to talk about it!

- Of course we have to talk. - No, we don't.

I don't care, it's none of my business.

Do whatever you want, but don't tell me because I don't want to know!

I just want to apologize to you...

There's no point, neither talking nor promising,

do whatever you want, just don't talk, I have enough problems already.

What else can I do, I'm just trying to say...

You'll tell me and you'll be okay until next time!

Listen, maybe you think I don't know or that I'm blind.

But I know how you get when you start something.

It doesn't matter to me, but I don't want to hear about it!

But I'm just trying to say, there's nothing to hear!

Do you think you'll get away with it after telling me what happened?

- No. - Well, you can't.

Go and do whatever you want, just don't tell me!

I don't care what you do.

Give me the money for the house and get out of my way.

And make sure you get that job, it's worth it!

Assistant Librarian Position Interview call.

May 15th at 3:30 PM.

Mr. Lewis? Mr. Benion?

So that's where they're hiding! The Council is in session.

- Which one of you is Lewis? - I'm Lewis.

This came for you.

There should be four of you. Where is the other one?

Not available at the moment.

I hope there are no problems, everything should run like clockwork.

We shouldn't keep the Council waiting.

They'll call them in alphabetical order.

You first, Mr. Benion.

- Use this one. - Thank you, John.

- Pass it here. - Thank you.

- It's all so confusing, isn't it? - It is a little.

I personally chose it.

See you later at the Queen's Head to celebrate. Love, Liz...

P.S. Employees off tonight!

- Is this your soap? - Yes, it's my personal soap.

- This is my water. - All right.

Anyway, it's a relief. Alphabetical order.

Very good.

You get there first and it's over quickly.

- Do you consider that an advantage? - Yes, that is an advantage.

Refreshed, are you refreshed?

First impressions are important, understand?

No one sets standards before me, I do.

True. Very interesting...

I won't mention that about you.

- That could get us in trouble. - Yes, yes.

It was on the train. I ordered the dish of the day.

It's not my usual meal, I wanted to treat myself.

Not that I expected to get the position...

Mr. Benion, please!

Not that I expected to get...

What are they like?

Next, please!

Good luck, leuan.

Mr. Jenkins.

- Have a seat, Mr. Jenkins. - Thank you.

Full name, please?

Leuan Esluin Owen Dufid ap Jenkins.

Are you Welsh?

Yes, yes, I am, thank you, sir.

Next, please. Where is Mr. Kennedy?

He's gone again.

I can't make the Council wait. Go ahead.

OK...

Mr. John Lewis.

Have a seat, Mr. Lewis.

I'm going to start with a very important question.

When he applied for this position, were you confident

that you would be able to meet the tasks it brings?

Yes, sir, yes.

I feel completely confident about the additional duties, yes.

Mr. Lewis's qualifications are before you.

There's no need to read them. Any questions?

In your opinion, what percentage of books should be in Welsh?

I think, sir, that they should be provided on demand.

On request?

Did you know that two out of every five people

in this part of Wales speak exclusively Welsh?

I'll take your word for it, sir, but they rarely ask for books in Welsh,

only foreigners do.

Mr. Lewis!

- What jobs have you done so far? - I used to write for a newspaper.

You've never been involved in plumbing work?

No, not at all, I've never been interested in plumbing.

I think we've strayed from the topic, Mr. Salter.

I would like to remind you

that it is our obligation to encourage and popularize local authors.

Which authors are you referring to, sir?

I meant poets like ap Gwilym, Cadwaladr, and Sion.

And another example, my colleague, Reverend Traharn Williams

and his story of Rhondda Baptist.

I'm afraid I'm not familiar with Reverend Williams's work, sir.

But he's our greatest poet! He's won six bardic chairs.

Six, sir...

Yes, but I've never been asked for that book.

And I think it's a scandal!

Would you ask the candidate that question? Through the president, of course.

What would your attitude be if a woman asked for "Lady Chatterley's Lover"?

- What did he say? - Lady Chatterley.

Did you understand the question, Mr. Lewis?

Yes, and I think I have to do my duty.

Thank you, Mr. Mr. President, that's all I wanted to know.

- If there are no further questions... - Mr. Lewis...

Perhaps you have a brother who's a plumber?

Does that matter, Mr. Salter?

I wanted to get a general overview, Mr. President.

- Mr. Lewis? - I don't have a brother, sir.

Is no one in your family involved in plumbing?

Well, actually, my father once had an unpleasant experience

at Juston Station during a blackout.

Well... it was dark and he didn't see that the train was stopped at the station.

Besides, no.

- Enlightened now, Mr. Salter? - I think so.

That will be all, sir. Lewis, you will be notified of the result.

- I can't... 'Well, you don't have to rush... '

- If you don't want to... - Help yourself, old man.

Just the salt, a bag of salt. I have a friend who collects them.

A passionate salt collector.

Well, like I said, help yourself.

- Sorry I'm late. - Okay. What are you drinking?

Maybe...

- Hi! - Oh, hello, Bill!

I have a business meeting with Mr. Lewis.

Yes, okay...

- Would you like a drink? - Yes, the usual and lots of ice.

I'll have a beer, thanks. At room temperature.

And my friend would like a bag of salt with some chips.

Salt?

He's never satisfied. He's crazy about it!

Didn't you hear, I have a business meeting?

Yes, good!

Thank you.

- He's well-trained, isn't he? - You're in a good mood.

Yeah, I'm not bad, all things considered.

- How was the interview? - Interview? Oh, yeah...

- Well, I fell. - Fell?

Fell, from the old Welsh verb, "fall from a great height."

What the hell are you talking about?

It has something to do with blood, you have to get it into the bloodstream.

We're going somewhere...

The pygmies have the same problem. Yes, I understand completely.

Tell your friend not to worry, there's a solution. See you soon.

Okay, what's this about?

Nothing, I just didn't meet their expectations.

Honey, don't be ridiculous. Of course you got the job!

I got the job?

Yes, everything was arranged a long time ago.

The interview was just a formality.

You mean, everything was pre-arranged?

Of course, Vernon had to make it sound convincing.

But he's also well-trained, you know.

He got the job when he first kissed me.

Listen, I have something else to tell you.

I've arranged for us to spend the weekend together.

You need to make up an excuse at home, it shouldn't be hard.

You'll like it, dear. Another thing I've wanted to say for a long time,

now that you have a new position and a higher salary,

it's not so uncomfortable anymore.

Honey, do you mind if I tell you to buy a new suit?

This one doesn't suit you. I want you to look great.

Will you do that for me? I'll give you the address.

No, thanks. I'd rather say

why don't you buy Bill a new collar instead?

What?

And by the way, enter them both in a dog show.

- But hey, where are you going? - I'm quitting.

What are you saying? You can't quit your job. Listen...

You need that raise.

Without it, how long do you think your marriage will last?

Maybe a little more than yours.

I wouldn't make any rash statements if I were you.

Thank old Vernon on my behalf

and kindly tell him what to do with this position.

- I don't understand you. - You won't understand:

The price is too high. Bye, Liz.

Bill!

Bill!

- Good evening, Mr. Lewis. - Good evening.

Going out tonight, Mr. Lewis?

Leaving would be in the opposite direction, Mrs. Davis.

Hello, love. You're a little early.

Never mind the pleasantries.

What the "Rye Catcher" are you doing here?

Getting cigarettes. - I see you're picking up cigarettes.

- No harm in that, right? - It depends on who threw them there!

What are you talking about?

I suppose they fell from your dirty, sweaty little hands.

- Are you crazy? - I've been on the edge of the abyss,

Don't think you can fool me.

If you're looking for excuses, find some really good ones!

If you don't mind, Jean, I say good night.

Wait a minute, you you've been here before, haven't you?

Once, for tea and cake.

Tea and cake. Cake is exactly the word for it.

- Ignore him, Gareth. - You know what you're looking for, don't you?

I've always thought you were rude, but now you're overstepping your bounds.

And you'll get yours, boy and it won't be in verse.

It's in your best interest, Jean, but I have to leave.

Living with a man like that must be an indescribable hell.

I wouldn't say indescribable.

If I may express it with the gems of excellent Welsh prose:

Disappear while you're still in one piece.

Unfortunately, I cannot face you on your level, Lewis.

- For me, that would be stooping too low. - Be careful what you say.

You're two floors above ground now.

Goodbye, Jean, you know where I am if you need me.

If he becomes violent, call the police.

Well, live and learn, huh?

I think you needed a nice literary evening.

Oh, there was nothing literary tonight. I was flattered.

- You what? - Flattered.

- You were flattered? - Do you want me to spell it?

And you know what? He says he still loves me.

- You let him say that? - Yes, I even made you repeat it.

And it may surprise you, I liked hearing that.

How long has this been going on?

Since when did you start taking an interest in amateur theater?

At this point, you say, "Now you know how I feel," right?

- How was the interview? - I got the job.

- Great, right? - No.

The whole interview was a sham, from start to finish.

And what did you do?

He told them he didn't want the job.

- For them or for her? - They're all the same, aren't they?

Anyway, it's not worth �150.

I messed it up pretty badly, didn't I?

Maybe it was worth it.

- I didn't sleep with her, you know. - No.

Let me tell you, I didn't sleep because I didn't try.

I know.

Honest John Lewis, that's me.

I don't think there's such a thing as an ideal couple.

I don't know, I think most are like us.

They somehow go through

undeclared wars and granted armistices.

Did you learn that in the library?

Okay, okay. Fair enough.

What are you looking for?

I wonder if the bastard poet left a cigarette on the floor.

- He's not your type, you know? - Who, Gareth? No, he's not.

She wasn't my type either. I'm dying for a cigarette.

She wasn't anything like you.

Ah, here it is.

- You're lucky. - Oh! I really am...

- Smoke it.

No, you smoke it. I just want a drag.

I'm better now.

Jean... I could try, you know.

- Could? - Yes. But we have to get out of here.

As far away as possible from those deer.

You know what? I have a great idea.

I figured out a reliable way to blow up a roof.

With a slow-burning wick.

The first ceiling in space, with Mrs. Davis!

Give me a drag, will you?

Give me a kiss first.

MOBILE LIBRARY

- Thank you. "Well, see you in 14 days."

Yes. - So, in 14 days, Mr. Lewis.

- About 14 days. - Thank you.

14 days is a long time.

Yes, it lasts two weeks, doesn't it?

I don't know what we would do without your visits.

But there's a big gap between them.

Couldn't you come every week?

Well, it depends on supply and demand.

We could supply demand, if you'd let us.

Do you... like to read?

What else do we have left in places like this?

Did you pick a book?

You don't know what I'm talking about, do you?

It doesn't matter. I'll wait two more weeks.

Yeah, maybe I'll wait even a little longer.

See you in 14 days then.

- Bye. - Bye.

- Is this the love nest? - Yes, the love nest.

You're doing well.

I think I'm definitely getting better, aren't I?

You still have a long way to go.

We both have a long way to go.

And a long trip home.