Original subtitles

(Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) So anyway, last night, I just rolled over

in bed and I asked him, I said,

Ramundo, did you sleep with her?

And he's all, I swear, baby, I never

touched her.

I know she's your sister, but she's a

lying whore.

Look, Fred, there's her building.

No, it's not.

It's Artie's building.

No, it's not.

Yes, it is.

I know.

Do you mind, please?

This is Fred, he'll show you a new

one.

Hello?

Yeah, I'm at the movies.

No, it's not a bad time.

I don't know if it's new, go smell

it.

Hey, no, you'll never complain.

I can't come over, just throw it out,

just throw it out of the trash, I

don't need it, just throw it out.

What the hell is the matter with you

people?

This is a movie.

You're here to listen to the actors talk.

That's why the seats face the screen and

not each other.

So you, you know, divorce Ramundo and you

two divorce each other.

And if you want to talk on your

phone, do what everybody else does, go to

a restaurant.

And for the rest of you, shut the

hell up so I can watch this damn

movie in peace.

Sometimes I feel like the last civilized person

in this city.

You know, all I wanted to do was

go to the movies.

I barely get past the opening credits before

every schmuck in the theater decides to host

his own talk show.

I finally just had to walk out.

You know, whatever happened to common courtesy?

I swear, people have absolutely no regard for

anybody but themselves.

All right, let me guess here.

You wanted to save a nickel, so you

went to the bargain matinee.

Matinee.

So?

So, that was your first mistake.

Matinee, bring out the rabble, your low rent

types, your hardcore unemployable.

Not to mention all those old pudding junkies

who barely know they've left the house.

Spend the buck, go later in the day,

weed's out the riff-raff.

You know, you got to admit, John, when

it comes to riff-raff, he's a man.

So what movie was it anyway?

Lethal Vision.

Oh, I saw that movie!

It's incredible!

Didn't you love the ending where the guy's

hanging from the roof and then he...

Hey, hey, hey, I just said I haven't

seen it.

Yeah.

I haven't either.

Well, you know, first...

First everybody talks through in the movie, now

you want to ruin the ending.

You know, there used to be a moviegoer's

code of conduct.

You shut up in the movie, you shut

up about the movie.

And Bob's a general rule, just shut up.

Hey, where's my coffee?

Reg, coffee!

Don't yell at me, Becker.

You want coffee?

Finish his.

I've got to get to school for registration.

I want to sign up for this really

easy art history class, and if I don't

get there soon, I'll never get in.

Fine, I'll just smoke my cigarette.

Ten fewer minutes of a life I'm not

thrilled about anyway.

Listen, Jake, I don't know how long this

is going to take, so if I don't

come back, close up for me.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down, Reg.

You might not have to go down to

school at all.

What are you talking about?

I was taking a look at your course

catalog here, and it says that handicapped students

get their pick-up classes and they don't

have to wait in the line.

So?

So, as luck would have it, you happen

to have a handicapped friend.

Screw you, Bob.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Especially Abel.

I could take the special ability to walk

into a lamppost.

Look, all I'm saying is send Blimey Locks

here in your place and let him sign

you up.

Forget it, Bob.

Reg would never ask me to do anything

like that, right, Reg?

Right, Reg?

Well, I really need this course, and you

could go right to the front of the

line.

Come on, Jake, use your powers for good.

So you want me to use my handicap

to make myself an object of pity, to

humiliate myself just so you can scam your

way through registration?

Oh, gee, that'd be great.

Look, Louis, I am not gonna keep going

home and making dinner if you're not gonna

be there.

But this is the third night this week.

What do you mean you don't want to

talk about it?

Fine, if you don't want to talk about

it, then we won't talk about it.

But believe me, when I get home, we're

gonna talk about it.

So, Margaret, it's not like I overheard a

phone call or anything, but I'm sensing that

there's a problem with you and Louis.

Do you want to talk about it?

Linda, there is nothing to talk about.

Hey, I hear you.

I hate it when something's bothering me and

people won't...

Leave me alone.

Exactly.

Like, they think it's gonna make me feel

better, even though I said...

I don't want to talk about it.

Exactly.

Because when I'm...

Linda, I don't want to talk about it.

Now leave me alone.

You'll have to tell me twice.

Okay, Linda, who's up?

Something's going on between Margaret and Louis.

She's really upset, and I think she needs

to talk about it.

But remember, you didn't hear it from me.

There are only three of us in this

office.

Who else would I have heard it from?

Damn!

Mr. Thalassinos is in, too.

Margaret, Linda says you have something you want

to talk about.

She's wrong.

I don't.

Well, there you go.

Problem solved.

Oh, don't schedule anything for me after 4

o'clock.

I'm leaving early to go to the movies.

Didn't you already go to the movies?

Yeah, long story.

Well, what movie are you gonna see?

Lethal Vision.

Oh, that's a great movie, especially when you

get to the surprise ending where the guy's

telling you...

Hey, hey, you say one more word about

that movie, you're gonna have a surprise ending.

Don't you just hate it when you buy

a T-shirt and the instructions are in

French?

I hurt my back.

I couldn't get my shirt off.

What happened?

Well, I was playing basketball.

You?

All right, I was watching basketball.

It was an exciting game, and I fell

off the couch.

Take a look.

Spin around.

All right.

All right.

Does that hurt there?

No.

What about here?

No.

Hey, I heard you saying you were going

to see Lethal Vision.

Yeah, but don't tell me anything about it.

Don't waste your time.

It sucks.

That big surprise ending with a guy hanging

from the...

Hey, hey, hey, I just said that I

don't want to hear anything about it.

I don't want to know the ending.

Well, you don't have much choice.

I mean, because you could see it coming

a mile away that the killer is...

Ow!

That's it.

That's the spot.

You sure?

Oh, yeah.

You going to stop talking about the movie?

Because I could check it again.

Oh, no, that's it.

All right.

Look, I think you just pulled a muscle,

but I want to take a couple of

x-rays to be sure.

Follow me.

Aren't you going to help me with my

shirt?

No.

God, you're more sadistic than that doctor in

the movie who operates on...

Ow!

Hey, Rich.

Finally!

Jake, where have you been?

You left hours ago.

Oh, so you were worried something happened to

me.

Yeah, right.

So did you get me into that class?

Okay, now, don't be mad, but, no, I

couldn't get you that class.

All right.

I guess I shouldn't have asked you to

begin with.

I'll go down there myself.

You're welcome.

Oh, yeah.

Thanks.

Doctor, don't even ask.

I don't have time to cook you anything.

You know, ever since I saw you last

night, I've started not eating here.

I'm feeling a lot better.

Just came to get a candy bar for

the movies.

I'll be damned if I'm going to pay

those thieves eight bucks for a box of

Raisinets.

See you.

Hey, hey, hey, wait a minute.

Where do you think you're going?

I heard you're stuffing your pockets with candy.

I'll pay you later.

No, you won't.

Look, I don't have time to argue with

you.

I'm trying to catch a four o'clock

showing of Lethal Vision.

Oh, you're going to give it another try,

huh?

Damn right I am.

I'm going to go to that theater.

I'm going to pay my money again, and

I'm going to have the quiet, civilized, satisfying

movie-going experience to which I'm entitled.

Reg, can I get some coffee today, or

is nothing still the special?

You can get anything you want.

Just don't expect decent service until May.

What happens in May?

New ownership?

No, that's when my school semester ends.

By the time I got to registration, the

art history class was filled.

All I could choose from was another psych

class or a seminar on William Blake.

Ah, William Blake, 19th century English poet, famous

painter, and if I recall, wrote the British

National Hymn.

I'll take boring for a hundred, Alex.

My point was, I was trying to give

myself a break this semester, but now I'll

be working 24 hours a week.

Twice as hard as I was last term.

Well, I feel for you, Reg, but I

got to be honest, only bitching I can

tolerate this early is my own.

Well, get out of my way.

Hey, excuse me, I'm looking for a guy

named Jake.

I think he works here.

Oh, he's not in yet.

Can I help you?

Mm, no, I was just in the neighborhood.

I thought I'd stop by.

We're going to dinner tonight.

Oh, I'm Shannon, by the way.

Reggie.

Hi.

Hi.

So, where'd you meet Jake?

Oh, at my college registration.

Really?

He didn't mention meeting anyone.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, he did the nicest thing for me.

See, uh, he got the last spot in

this one art history class I needed, but

then one...

Excuse me?

Did you say art history?

Yeah.

Anyway, when I told him how much I

needed it, he just gave it to me.

Wasn't that sweet?

Yeah, sweet.

I know, my heart just went out to

him.

I mean, it's tough enough getting through school.

I can't even imagine trying to handle it

being blind.

I'll see ya.

You know, Shannon...

I probably shouldn't say anything.

No, you know what?

I should.

You deserve to know.

Jake isn't really blind.

What?

Oh, it's a scam.

The glass is the cane.

He bumps into stuff.

Women think he's helpless, and they just melt.

Oh, you're kidding.

Well, how long does he usually keep this

up?

Well, usually until he...

His word's not mine.

Closes.

Oh.

What a pig.

Well, listen, you can tell him from me

that he can go straight to hell.

Wouldn't you rather tell him yourself?

Like...

I don't know, after a really expensive dinner?

Oh, yeah, that's good.

Thanks.

If you shoot at the queen, you better

kill her.

Doctor's office.

Oh, hi, Louis.

That's why I didn't answer it.

I'm glad you called.

John is leaving early, so if you want,

maybe we could go to...

You're going out with your friends again?

Louis, what is going on?

Fine.

Call if you're gonna be late.

Margaret, if you want to talk about it...

I don't want to talk about it.

Dr. Becker, I'm so worried about Margaret and

Louis, and now she really doesn't want to

talk about it.

So I think you know what you should

do.

Yes, I do.

Go to the movies.

But Margaret is upset, and that's way more

important than that stupid, lethal vision movie.

Big surprise ending.

So what?

The guy had...

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

What is it with everyone?

You know, it used to be when people

went to the movies, they didn't talk about

it.

You know, when Hitchcock made Psycho, they had

signs in the lobby warning people not to

talk about the movie, and you know what?

They didn't.

That way, nobody knew that Tony Perkins dressed

up as his mother and killed all those

people.

So you're telling me that you like movies

where men dress up in women's clothing?

That has nothing to do with...

Yeah, Linda, yeah, right.

I-I love movies about cross-dressing killers.

Well, then you're gonna love Lethal Vision.

Margaret, I just want you to know if

you need somebody to talk to, I'm here

for you.

I don't need to talk.

Oh, thank God.

I only got about five minutes to get

through.

Wait, you're going to the movies?

Yeah.

What are you gonna see?

Lethal Vision, but please don't tell me anything

about it.

No, I wasn't going to.

I haven't seen it either.

In fact, I was gonna ask if I

could go with you.

Oh, Margaret, that...

Maybe that's just what I need, a nice,

quiet movie to take my mind off things.

All right.

You did say quiet movie.

Yeah.

I just want to sit in the dark

and escape into someone else's life.

You are, Margaret.

You're escaping into mine.

Insurance.

Insurance.

I just want to say I'm sorry for

being so moody lately.

Okay, okay, great.

Just...

Shh.

There's just a lot going on at home.

There's a lot going on up there.

Hey, come on.

Be quiet.

I know, I know.

Don't worry.

Lewis and I are really having problems.

Now you have to talk about it?

You waited this long.

Wait another two hours.

Do you mind?

He's distant.

He's moody.

He's almost never at home.

Maybe it's because you talk too much.

Hey, you know, you got to cut her

a little slack here.

You know, she's having problems.

I'm sorry, John.

I'm fine now.

Good.

It's all right.

She's fine.

Shh.

Hey, come on, come on, come on.

I want to see this movie as much

as you do, but the woman's in pain,

you know?

Don't you have any compassion for any other

people's feelings?

John, John, it's okay.

Be quiet.

Yeah, John, shut up.

Please, please don't do this.

Don't you know any better than to talk

during the movies?

There's a reason the seats face the screen

instead of each other.

That's mine.

I'm the one who says that.

I say it all the time.

Ask anyone.

I'm always saying that.

John.

I am.

John, let's go.

No, no, no, I'm staying here.

I want to see this movie.

John, please.

You're causing a scene.

Let's go.

Well, it's just not fair.

I-I never talk in the movies.

As a matter of fact, if you hear,

shh, in a movie, it's probably me.

I'm the good one.

I'm the polite one.

I mean, whatever happened to common courtesy?

You know, when Hitchcock made Psycho, they...

Jake, I'm sorry.

When I suggested that restaurant, I had no

idea it would be so expensive.

Oh, that's okay.

It wasn't that the restaurant cost so much.

It was...

Well, all the food you ordered.

Well, the steak was a little overdone, you

know, so...

Oh, it's a good thing you had that

7-pound lobster.

Well, you have to admit, it went great

with that second bottle of champagne.

I'll be honest.

I've never seen anyone, man or woman, eat

that much.

Hmm.

I'll bet there's a whole lot you haven't

seen, huh, Jake?

No.

Um, maybe I should have mentioned this before,

but whenever we get to a curve, if

you could let me know, that would really

be a big help.

Oh, come on.

How long are you gonna keep this up,

pretending to be blind?

What are you talking about?

I am blind.

Let me tell you something.

This is one deal you are never gonna

close, okay?

And get rid of this stupid can in

this dump truck.

Hey, hey, hey!

What are you doing?

I need those!

Please.

Reggie told me everything.

Reggie?

Screw you, Jake.

Shannon.

Uh-oh.

Oh, no.

Hey, what are you doing?

Yes!

Every marriage goes through a bad week or

two.

But that's what I'm trying to tell you,

John.

It hasn't just been for the last few

days.

I haven't said anything, but things at home

haven't been good for a very long time.

We don't go out, we don't talk, and

when it comes to the bedroom, I...

No, no, no.

Let's just leave it at things aren't good

at home.

Cretin.

I just don't know what's going on.

Have you asked him?

Of course I've asked him.

He said he didn't want to talk about

it.

Well, then you're just gonna have to tell

him how you feel.

I feel angry.

I feel confused.

I feel lonely.

I feel...

I said tell him how you feel.

Oh, you're right.

I'm just gonna have to go and deal

with this situation.

Taxi!

Oh, John, that was kind of weird in

there.

Are you all right?

Yeah, I'm...

I'm fine.

You seem really wound up.

Well, you know, Margaret, there used to be

something called a moviegoer's code of conduct.

Well, there was.

Hey, Jay, what are you doing here?

John, is that you?

Yeah.

You all right?

You don't look so good.

Well, all I can tell you is, never

lie to Reggie.

Ever.

Ever.

Where am I, anyway?

Uh, outside the theater.

I went to go see Lethal Vision again.

Oh, yeah?

How'd you like it?

I have no idea.

You know, so far, I've paid 23 bucks

for a movie I haven't seen.

That's nothing.

I just paid 200 for a dinner I

didn't eat.

Oh.

Well, uh, listen, I'm sorry.

I gotta go.

For some reason, I still want to see

this damn movie.

Uh, you mind if I come along?

Oh, well, sure, yeah.

Okay.

Here you go.

What happened to your cane?

Oh, you don't want to know.

What's going on?

Car chase.

Who fired the gun?

Bad guy.

Who'd he shoot at?

Good guy.

Did he hit him?

Come on.

Done.

Done?