Original subtitles

(Ducks quacking)

Oh... (Chuckles) Golf.

Hey, Nanny!

Excuse me!

- Oh, no, sir, that's not ours. - It was lying there.

- No, sir! - But Nanny...

lt certainly isn't mine. Eh, baby?

Please, we've had a disturbed morning as it is.

- Well, perhaps when he wakes up? - No, thank you.

We don't know where it's been, do we?

(Barks)

(Barks)

Thank you.

(Whimpers)

(Barking)

(Engine revs)

Look out!

(Car horn honking)

(Woman) Oh, my dear!

- Is this the kiddie? - Well, it's the pram.

- No baby. Funny, isn't it? - Could be.

But a woman'll often go shopping with an empty pram.

- Not a nanny in Regent's Park. - l don't know. Still, we'll check on it.

Now, could l have your name, sir?

- Yes, Hannay. - (Ambulance bell ringing)

How do you spell it? - H-A-N-N-A-Y. Richard Hannay.

6 Oswald Court, W1 .

(Ambulance stops)

- Where will they take her? - St Mary's l should think, sir.

- Uh-huh. - Thank you, sir.

lf we find this car we may need to see you again.

l hope she isn't too badly hurt.

Oh, by the way.

Give that to the super.

She's gone. Treated for shock and allowed to go home.

Surely you have her address?

Yes but we're not supposed to...

Ah, l know, but after all l was there and this is her ha_dbag.

- Isn't there a letter or something in it? - Nothing.

Quite a great deal of money. l could hand it over to the police but...

there might be a delay and she'd be worrying.

- Well... - Well. l have an honest face.

- 13 No_olk Terrace, W2. Miss Robinson. - Thanks.

Good morning! Can you tell me...

is this 13 No_olk Terrace?

Was, once upon a time. 13's an unlucky number, isn't it?

(Applause)

- Curtain's up, sir. - What? Oh, yes.

- May l leave a ticket for a friend? - What name, sir?

- Miss Robinson. She may turn up later. - Very good, sir.

- That way. - Thanks.

(# Jazz)

Ah, Miss Robinson.

How's the baby tonight?

Are you the Mr Hannay who recovered the pram?

Yes.

You have my...

- Some things of mine. - Yes, but, er, they're back at the flat.

That's a pity. There's no need to involve yourself in this affair.

Am l involved?

l say. How delightful.

- What's it all about? - We can't talk here.

Well, l can tear myself away, unless you particularly want to stay.

Presently. The next turn is the interesting one.

Look.

They never let him out of their sight.

- Who? - Mr Memory, you're on now!

(# Trumpet fanfare)

The darn nursemaid's here again.

- The nanny? But l thought...? - They bungled it.

Penge, Streatham, Chiswick and now here.

Now, it's my pleasure to introduce you to one of the most remarkable men alive.

A human encyclopaedia of facts and figures.

Here to answer your questions, whatever they may be,

none other than Mr Memory!

(# Upbeat theme)

Thank you and good evening, Iadies and gentlemen.

Before we begin l must tell you that l am not a magician.

l cannot tell you whether your future life partner will be blonde or brunette

or how many children you can expect to have.

- (Laughter) - (Mr Memory) 'No, l deal in hard facts.

'The facts of human memory#

Sporting, scientific, geographical, political and historical.

Now, who's ready with the first question?

- (Man) What time is it? - (Laughter)

Speak up, lady, don't be afraid.

What was the name of Napoleon's horse at Waterloo?

His name was Marengo. A white stallion, 15 hands high.

- Am l right, madam? - Yes.

The next question, please.

Where do flies go in the wintertime?

- (Laughter) - Where's my old woman?

Sensible questions, if you please. Yes, sir, you have a question?

What connects the Sheik of Bahrain and the island of St Helena?

We have a young gentleman with a riddle from the mysterious East.

Just back from abroad, sir?

- Yes. - Would you repeat the question?

What connects the Sheik of Bahrain and the island of St Helena?

The island of St Helena is the place of exile of those convicted

of plotting against the life of the Sheik of Bahrain. Am l right?

Bang on.

- And the next question. - What is Nemon's law of gravitation?

- (Laughter) - l believe you were first, sir.

(Man) What president of the United States was assassinated?

ls it far from here to your flat?

About five minutes in a taxi.

- We'd better go. They know l'm here. - After you.

(Mr Memory) ..and W McKinley, 1901. Am l right, sir?

You came up the stairs smartly. l thought you might be stiff after your accident.

lt wasn't an accident, Mr Hannay, they tried to kill me.

Please don't turn on that light.

Feeling any happier?

Who are you?

What if l said my work concerned our national security?

You mean you're a kind of a spy?

Well, we don't like that word, Mr Hannay, but you're not far off the mark.

Those men are waiting for me.

Oh, come now, you need a good rest.

Take a trip somewhere, get away from it all.

Perhaps, when the job's finished.

You travel a lot, Mr Hannay?

You mean all this? Yes, my job takes me all over the place.

l work for the government too, sort of.

Political wa_are you'd call it. Only got back yesterday.

- May l get you a drink? - Thank you but l don't.

Just as well, there isn't much here.

- Do you mind if l have what there is? - Of course not.

Then we can return your things and get you home.

- Where do you live? - Willesden.

Willesden?! That sounds a romantic hideaway for a secret agent.

- Is your name really Robinson? - It is actually

but officially l'm referred to as ''Nanny''.

Nanny.

l expect you think l'm mad but...

Oh, no. A spot of persecution mania, perhaps.

l had an uncle who suffered from the same thing.

With him it was window cleaners.

Cheerio.

Have you ever heard of the 39 steps?

What's that, a do-it-yourself kit?

Does Boomerang mean anything to you?

Yes. It's a cover word for a ballistic missile.

The country that pe_ects Boomerang will be immune to all forms of attack.

So you see, the stakes do run pretty high, Mr Hannay.

Yes, l know they do.

But if you know there's a leak why not go to the police?

ln this country if one breaks the law...

The ones that matter never do.

You've got me doing it now.

Right, supposing what you say is true. Why tell me?

Now they know who l am, l may not have time to send in my report before...

- Before there's another accident? - Yes.

What do you want me to do?

lt's a jigsaw puzzle. l want to give you the few bits l have.

- Then l can go to Scotland tomorrow... - Scotland?

There's a man there l have to see.

So little time! The information will be out of this country within 48 hours.

And this organisation, the ones that matter, is there a head man?

We think so but we don't know who.

He's continually changing his way of life.

All we do know is that he has the top joint of his little finger missing.

Hm. These 39 steps, are they in Scotland?

Oh dear, there's no short answer to that one.

We shall have to begin at the beginning.

Before we do there is one thing l would like.

- What's that? - A cup of tea.

l'm very good at that. l'll put the kettle on.

(Big Ben chiming in distance)

There isn't any sugar, l'm afraid. Do you mind...?

Miss Robinson?

(Whispers) Oh, my God.

- (Man) 'Can l help you?' - Emergency. Police.

'For emergency services replace the receiver and dial 999#

(Phone)

(Ringing continues)

(Ringing stops)

(Horse whinnying)

(# Whistling chee_ully)

You gave me a start. You're up early, ain't you?

- Shh. - What's the caper?

Good morning. Tell me, do you happen to be a married man?

- Is this for the telly? - No, l'd just like to know.

- Well, l am, and then again, l'm not. - What do you mean by that?

l'm a separated man, see. Obliged to live now � la carte you might say.

Yes, l think l follow you. Now look...

- You see those two men? - Yeah.

They happen to be detectives employed by the husband.

- Whose husband? - The woman upstairs.

l slipped in last night to have a look at her etchings...

l stayed a little too long. You follow?

Follow? That's how l come to be a separated man.

- Only it wasn't etchings. - What was it?

- Budgerigars. What do you need? - A man after my own heart.

Would you mind walking up and down just once?

Have you ever had a sucking pig?

- Tender as a baby. - Never had that either.

(# Whistling chee_ully)

Or peaches done in brandy. Delicious.

(Girl) Fisher was absolutely foul to me last term.

l simply adore her really.

Fisher's not so bad. Mavis Carter met her in Edinburgh in the hols.

- She was super away from the place. - Do you think she's attractive to men?

- Hm... - Mavis Carter said she looked smashing.

l think there's been a great tragedy in Fisher's life.

Like having a secret yen for Lord Mountbatten.

Oh, do shut up about Fisher, Monica!

Just because she keeps her private life to herself you invent things about her.

l'm only imagining! Anyhow, she's the best netball coach the school's ever had.

'The body of the woman found stabbed earlier today has not been identified.

'The police want to interview Richard Hannay, the tenant of the flat,

'who they believe may be able to help with their enquiries.

'He is thought to be travelling to the north, possibly Scotland.

'Aged about 35, of middle height with brown hair and grey eyes.

'When last seen he was wearing a brown tweed suit and light, belted raincoat.

'The weather forecasters predict Iong, sunny periods this morning..#

(Announcements on PA)

(Girl) Edinburgh, only another hour and we'll be back in the hen coop.

l feel amully hungry, don't you?

- l'm starving! - Excuse me.

They might have a new cook.

Excuse me.

(Train whistle)

(# Bagpipes)

Oh, come on, girls! Come on, you'll miss the train!

(Laughter)

(Guard blows whistle)

- Good luck! - Thank you very much, Officer.

(Woman) Goodbye! Goodbye!

(Train whistle)

- Cheerio! - Bye-bye, dear.

Have a good time!

(Laughing)

- Sir, will you be taking the first dinner? - Er, yes, thank you.

Please forgive me, my name's Richard Hannay.

Yon fellow's jumping the gun a bit, eh?

(Chuckles) Aye.

(Screams)

lf it isn't Miss Fisher, the best netball coach in the business.

You must understand, l'm not running away from anything

but if l give myself up it'll take too long and l'll be too late.

- l don't understand - Why should you? Just trust me.

Excuse me, l'm a police officer. l wonder if you can help me?

lf you're looking for Richard Hannay this is the man you want.

- Is your name Hannay? - Excuse me. Take your seats for dinner.

(Train whistle)

Come on.

(Woman screams)

What in blazes...?!

You...! Give me that napkin!

You've ruined my suit! What's your problem?!

- Excuse me. - Will you stand back?!

- l'm a police officer. - Well, arrest this idiot!

- Any sign of him, miss? - No, not out here.

Thank you.

- Did anybody see him jump? - No, l reckon he's on the train.

ln the lavatory, maybe.

(Seagulls crying)

(Man) Hey, we've got a timetable to keep! We can't wait here all day!

(Train whistle)

(Train whistle)

(Boat horn)

(Dog barking)

l never wanna know a thing about nobody.

Not even when l pick 'em up halfway to Aberdeen.

What did you say the place was called?

Glenkirk, near Blairgowrie.

Blairgowrie. You'll never get there before tomorrow.

l'll drop you off just after we get to Perth. Right, Harold?

You're right, Perce.

That'll be just after we pass that police checkpoint.

- What police checkpoint? - Cops are looking for some bloke.

- Often happens. - Do they know what he's wanted for?

- No, they've come from up north. - You know?

No, we've been on the road all day. Still, they're looking for somebody.

But l don't think we need to worry, do you, Harold?

- Too true, Perce. - My yes man. (Laughs)

Ever been inside?

- No. - l have.

- So you can talk if you want. - What do you mean?

You're the bloke, ain't you?

- Yes, l'm the bloke. - Hear that, Harold? He's the bloke.

Yeah.

How far are we off that police checkpoint?

Oh, about, er, five or six mile.

What are you gonna do, hand me over?

l never said that. No questions, l said.

- But l've gotta ask you one. - Go ahead.

What you done l don't wanna know, just one thing.

Well?

Well, it, er, wasn't anything unpleasant, was it?

You know, er... You get me.

l get you. It wasn't.

Good.

Because l wouldn't lift a finger to help one of those... Would l, Harold?

No, not you, Perce.

l think we better drop him off at Nellie's.

You and Nellie'll hit it off a treat, boy.

Told you it wouldn't be long. There she is, The Gallows.

- That's a charming name. - Innit?

- Is it a pub? - Filling station, caff, beds, the lot.

Tell Nellie Percy Baker sent you.

Thanks very much, Percy, l'm obliged to you. The best of luck.

Ta-ra.

What is it? What?

Oh, l'm terribly sorry to disturb you but l need a bed for the night.

This is a fine time to wake people up!

Well, l realise that but... Actually, Percy Baker sent me, he said to ask for Nellie.

Oh...

Hang on a minute then, l'll speak to the wife.

Nellie. Nellie.

Someone from Percy Baker, Nel.

Well, what colour is he? Not red, l hope?

- Too dark to tell. - Well, go and ask him, you old goose.

(Owl hoots)

Nel wants to know what colour you are, mister.

- Er, white. - No, no!

No, she means are you fair or are you dark?

Oh. Brown hair, hazel eyes.

- Why? - Right.

He's a club or a spade, Nel.

lt was a club man l saw in me teacup this evening.

- Ask him when his birthday is. - He'll think...

l don't care, l'm not having a Sagittarius in this house tonight.

(Man) When's your birthday? (Hannay) What's that got to do with it?

(Man) You know Nel. (Hannay) The 6th of January.

Capricorn. Lucky for him.

Lumsden's the name. You've heard of Mrs Lumsden, of course.

No, l haven't.

You don't remember the Lumsden case? Spiritualism? No, you'd be too young.

- l've been abroad quite a lot. - That explains it.

Excuse me. Sit down, Mr, er...? Do sit down, Mr...?

- Hammond. - That's right. You sit down.

lt was dreadful, they charged her under the Witchcraft Act.

Some witch, eh? (Laughs)

Of course, you've not met her, have you?

- Er, no, not yet. - So they put her in jail.

That's how l come to buy this place, thought l'd get her away from it all.

But she's at it again.

Down the valley of the shadow and here's a message from your dead uncle.

Talk of angels and... Yes.

- Mr Hammond, Nel. - Mr Hammond.

And what's this old goose been telling you?

l was telling him what a remarkable woman you are.

Get him some food while l tell him what a remarkable man you are.

What? Oh, righto, Nel.

Pay no attention to him.

Of all our many earthly planes, poor Lumsden exists on the very lowest.

He's a poor provider.

lf it weren't for my circle we should be in queer street. Sit down.

(Clears throat)

- Are you in trouble? - l'm sorry to disturb you at this hour

- but l need food and sleep. - l hate to see people in trouble.

That's what got me where l am.

lf people can't find a bit of comfort on this side

where's the harm in helping them find it on the other?

No harm at all providing...

Yet they gave me four years for that.

Four years of youth and beauty wiped clean off me slate.

So, er, you want to lay up here for a while, do you?

Actually no but l have to find somebody and it's desperately important.

Oh, l'm sorry. Percy Baker laid up here for five weeks.

lt was a lovely little arrangement we had.

While it lasted.

You see, poor old Lumsden's long past caring about...that sort of thing.

Well, men don't always go in for the little skinny ones, you know.

Oh, no.

No, variety is the spice of life.

Who is it you've got to go and see?

Somebody in Glenkirk. l've got to get there tomorrow.

Glenkirk... Glenkirk...

Shall we see what we shall see, my dear?

- l was hoping... - Shh! Just a minute.

There's something coming.

Oh, my dear. (Tuts) Oh. There's blood, Mr Hammond.

There's violence!

Oh... The pain, in my back.

Oh...

Well, what do you see?

l see a...

Oh, no, it's too horrible.

The poor creature. The poor wretched woman.

- What woman? - l see curtains drawn across a window.

The room is dark. Now l see something else.

- Well? - A knife, Mr Hammond.

What kind of a knife, Mrs Lumsden?

Just a minute. Yes...

lt's a knife with a long, curved blade.

Hm. Is it from the East, perhaps?

lt could be. It's Persian, actually.

How would you know that, Mr Hammond?

l read it in the paper, Mrs Lumsden, same as you did.

You're a cool one, Mr Hannay.

A very cool one, my dear.

So am l if it comes to that.

Look, why don't you stay and help us with the circle?

- They'd never find you. - You don't object to a murderer?

You're no murderer. Not you.

The police don't share your opinion. They'd never believe my story.

- Nor mine. - If l can get to Glenkirk tomorrow...

- How much money have you got? - About f40.

You'll get there.

How? The police have checkpoints on all the roads and railway stations.

Listen, if l can get Hiawatha

to come all the way from his happy hunting ground every Tuesday

then l can surely get you to Glenkirk tomorrow.

For a consideration, of course.

- Of course. - (Door opens)

Haven't we got a breakfast on in the morning, Lumsden?

Yes, Nel. The Freewheelers of Clackmannan, 30 of 'em.

Oh, l say, that looks good. Thank you so much.

That's the best we can do, Mr Hammond.

Anything for a friend of Percy Baker's because...Percy did a lot for me.

That'll be enough from you, Lumsden.

Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible.

The Freewheelers of Clackmannan.

- Lumsden, we must have a little talk. - What about, Nel?

About tomorrow's arrangement.

- But it's all ready. Six dozen eggs... - Get into the kitchen you old goose

- and let this poor man eat in peace. - Righto, Nel.

l know where to look for the answer, Mr Hannay.

Good, where?

Among the Freewheelers of Clackmannan.

(Excited yelling and laughter)

(All chattering)

All fixed up, Nel. Be off in a moment.

Where is he? l've made him a packed lunch.

ln the kitchen, come to say goodbye.

So you're off then? You should be in Glenkirk by lunchtime.

Thank you for everything.

Buck up, you chaps! Red wants everyone outside!

- There's still three waiting! - They'll have to follow.

You'll have to hurry. Here's your lunch, put it somewhere safe.

Sure you won't change our mind? You'd make a lovely Hiawatha.

- (Laughs) How! - That's it!

- Paleface no like red man. - You and me could make things hum.

Oh, well. Tuesdays and Fridays is circle night if you're back this way.

- l won't forget. And goodbye, Mrs... - Oh, come off it. Nellie.

All right, then, Nellie.

- Nellie! - Oh, you old goose!

Plenty more where that came from!

(All chanting)

(Car horn)

(Officer) Will you check that lot? (Constable) Right.

Right, on you go.

- Where you from? - Clackmannan.

- You do this for pleasure? - Aye, that's right.

Aye, on your way then.

Come on!

Hey! You!

(Horn honks)

Och, it's no' him at all.

What the devil are you doing? Are you daft or what?

- You said, ''on your way''. - Did ye no hear me shouting?

- No, l didn't. - Where d'ye think ye're going?

Look here, what right have you to speak to me like that?

- Listen you... - l dis... l d... l dis...

l distinctly heard you say, ''On your way''.

(Sheep bleating)

Ah, good day to you, shepherd.

(Thick accent) l'm no shepherd, l'm Lowrie.

Oh. Mr Lowrie. Er, you come from Glenkirk?

Aye, and back here if that's what ye mean.

l've seen the world mind ye - Glasgow, Cape Town, Bombay and Mandalay.

But a man must away home in the end. Like the sheep, perhaps.

l see what you mean. Tell me, are there any important folk hereabouts?

- Is there a laird? - Aye, McClaine, and a good Scot too.

Saw the poor fella put to his grave a month ago.

Oh, l'm very sorry. l-ls there anyone else?

There's folk at the mount, the minister and that

but they're not to my taste, if ye understand.

Yes, yes, l think l do. But isn't there a doctor or somebody?

There's a doctor, l think, but l've had no call to visit him myself.

Oh, hold on, would it be foreigners you were asking for?

- ''Foreigners''? - Aye, like yourself. Sassenachs.

You mean Englishmen? Yes, they probably would be.

The new folk up at Glenkirk House - a professor or something.

A professor? And where is this house?

Keep on towards the loch there and you cannae miss it.

l'm much obliged to you. Thank you, shepherd.

- l mean, er, Lowrie. - Aye.

Let him pass. That's right.

There's no sign of him, we've checked the other road.

(Snap)

Aye.

Yes, sir. Very good, sir.

Aye.

(Engine approaching)

- l havenae seen him. - Nor l.

- He probably went by the other road. - Aye. Ah, well.

All right.

(Engine approaching)

(Barks)

(Whispers) Good dog.

Tea up!

(lndistinct chatter)

(Dog barks)

(Dog whining)

(Boy) Stick 'em up!

Well, howdy pardner. You sure got me covered.

- Who's the boss of this outfit? - My uncle, he's a friend of the sheriff.

Really? Well, now you listen.

Get 'em up!

Would you like to give a very, very secret message to your uncle?

- Sure. - Good. Now, you listen to me.

- David! - Here he is.

Come on.

David, you're to go straight in and wash your hands.

(Woman) l'm dying for a cup of tea. (2nd woman) Me too.

Hello, David, what is it? Tea's ready, l suppose?

Yes but before that l've got a secret message to deliver.

- Ah, Davy Crockett again? - No, Uncle, this is a real message.

- Who is it from this time? - Nanny Robinson.

- Who did you say? - Nanny Robinson.

Yes, l...l thought you did.

- Who told you to say that? - The man in the old summerhouse.

''The man in the old summerhouse''?

l see.

Well, let's go down and see what it's all about, shall we, David?

Tell your aunt there'll be another for tea.

- OK, Uncle. - Not OK, say, ''Very well, Uncle''.

- Did Nanny send you here? - Yes, er, in a way.

- You know what happened? - She was one of our best.

l'm very sorry. She was a brave woman.

- It's Hannay, isn't it? - l've taken to calling myself Hammond.

Oh, quite, quite. There's no need to worry about the police, not now.

My name's Logan, Professor Logan.

- Glad to meet you, sir. - Let's go back to the house, shall we?

Did she tell you how they intended to get this information out?

No, sir. But l think she knew.

Oh, yes, l think she knew. Well, we'll have to move fast.

Yes, l know. She said everything we have on Boomerang

could be on the other side in 48 hours.

Or even less.

Have you told me everything? l must be sure if l'm to act.

Yes, sir, l think that's everything.

Good. l think we're all going to be pretty grateful to you, my boy.

- Oh, there is one other thing, sir. - Yes?

Something to do with the man in control.

What about him?

Nanny said the top of his little finger was missing.

- Which one? - This one, l think.

(Chuckles) You're sure it wasn't this one?

l'm sorry, l've been leading you down the garden path.

Or is it up? l never can remember.

- l'm certainly in the wrong garden. - Precisely.

You put me in a very difficult position.

Well, what do you propose to do about it?

Ah, that's the problem.

lf l were to hand you over to the police

it's just possible that you might be able to persuade them to take some action

which would be inconvenient to us at this moment.

By the way, Nanny was quite right about Boomerang, we've got it.

On the other hand l can't let you go around loose. What are we going to do?

No, l don't think l should make a dash for it if l were you.

Remember, you're wanted for murder.

l think there's only one answer, Mr Hannay.

Don't touch it!

Arthur? Your tea's getting cold.

All right, Louisa, we're coming.

l ought to shoot you now, Logan,

but l've too much to explain to the sheriff as it is.

You won't get far, Hannay.

We'll see.

(Louisa) Did l give you enough milk? How about you?

Ah, Mr Hammond, you've met everybody, haven't you? Do you take sugar?

- No, thank you. In fact, no tea. - Funny sort of fella.

That's the one, he's probably in with the sheriff now.

Aye, l grant you that, Mr Hannay.

And l don't doubt that you can convince the authorities in London

that you took the right action.

lt's a most remarkable story. Most remarkable.

Yes, sir. But something must be done about Logan now.

Oh, aye, l'll get on to Edinburgh.

The whole story'll be on the teleprinter to Scotland Yard.

- And Logan in the meantime? - Leave Logan to us.

Something will conveniently go wrong with his telephone.

Good, now we're getting somewhere.

lf you hadn't just happened to have that wee pistol with you

- l doubt if you'd have got out alive. - You're probably right.

- A very neat little job. - Providing you're at the right end.

- Go and stand over there. - What?!

And raise up your hands.

- Now look here... - You're under arrest.

Charged with wilful murder of a woman on Tuesday last.

- You heard my story! - Ridiculous nonsense.

- Professor Logan is a close friend. - Oh...

- Stay where you are! - No need to shout.

- That's not loaded, you know. - What?!

l wouldn't go around with a dangerous weapon!

(Click)

(Sheriff) Hold that man!

Quick, get in.

(Baaing)

- Will you stop, please? - (Brakes squeal)

Go on. Go on!

(Woman) Ah!

Well, hello, Mr Pringle! Come along!

l'm Johnson. Miss Dent said you got Iost, she's been looking for you.

Come along, we're all ready.

He's arrived at last, girls.

Mr Pringle, would you sit down while l say a few words?

Well, as you see our speaker has arrived at last

although from an unexpected direction.

Today, under the auspices of the Field Club,

Mr Pringle is going to give us a talk called, charmingly,

The Woods And The Wayside In August.

With a very special emphasis on the spleenwort,

which we looked at last term. Remember, fourth form and upwards?

Without further ado, l'm going to ask you

to give Mr Pringle a real St Catharine's welcome.

(Applause)

Thank you, thank you very much.

Now, well, er...

Er, ladies and...ladies.

How stupid of me.

The wayside and the woods in August.

- (Laughter) - Well...

Before l start talking about the spleenwart...

- (Laughter) - No, no, the spleenwort,

which is a most disgusting thing to talk about anyway,

l think l...l ought to tell you a little story.

Now, there was an Englishman... (Chuckles)

a Scotsman and an Irishman.

All this happened long before aeroplanes or anything like that.

Now, the Englishman and the Scotsman were walking from Dublin to Cork.

Or it might have been from Cork to Dublin.

l'm not sure which. Whichever was the shorter.

- What's he doing now? - Giving them a lecture. He's got nerve.

So the Irishman says, ''l'd rather sleep with a pig'',

and the Englishman says, ''But Paddy, that's exactly what you did do.''

(Laughter)

- Excuse me, miss. - Yes?

We'll have to take your lecturer back to the station with us.

lt was a present. A farmer gave them to me.

- Not you, brother. - Mr Pringle?

We only know him as Hannay - Richard Hannay.

- Richard Hannay? Where is he? - In here.

Of course, all this is very far removed from the subject

on which your charming headmistress would like emphasis to be placed.

Let's not forget that spleenworts aren't everybody's meat.

l had a parrot once that was allergic to spleenworts.

lf one so much as opened a spleenwort his language was frightful.

(lnaudible)

l can't have a sordid scene in front of my girls.

Now... Now, the sight of spleenworts absolutely disgusted him.

And you'll agree that a disgusted parrot is a most unhappy bird.

(lnaudible)

- l was faced with a situation, which... - Oh, no!

..even as a most devoted admirer of a spleenwort, l could not tolerate.

As far as the woods and the wayside is concerned...

(Alarm bell)

Um... Well, l would like you girls to take away with you this one splendid thought.

Whatever you do, don't fall by the wayside,

but more important still,

keep out of the woods - especially in August.

Well, well, dear old Fisher. (Chuckles) You ought to get a medal.

- Don't speak to me. - You know this creature?

Yes, he's the man who insulted me on the train.

You don't imagine l wanted to kiss you, do you?

How dare you talk to my staff in this manner!

- Dry up, Hannay. - All present and correct, Miss Prescott,

- except for Butler and Kemp. - l'll come and dismiss them.

- Get this man off the premises. - Fisher, listen to me...

Telephone Scotland Yard, tell them to check Boomerang!

There's been a leak! Something to do with the 39 steps! Do you understand?

l have no idea what you're talking about.

Don't be a chump, this is important! Contact Scotland Yard!

Turn it in, or you'll get your arm broken!

The man they want is a Professor Logan at Glenkirk! Will you do that? Ow!

- Fisher! - Just a moment, miss.

- Yes? - Come along to the station with us.

- Whatever for? - Formal identification. Would you mind?

Mind? l should love it.

There's the police station.

But we've just passed it.

- (Man) We aren't going to that one. - Then where are we going?

lnveraray. This man's to be questioned by the Sheriff Principal.

- But you have no orders to take me. - You'll be brought back, miss.

How far is it to Inveraray?

74 miles.

- Then l won't get back tonight. - Not before lights out.

- May l have a look at your warrant? - You'll see it when we get to Inveraray.

Hey, Fish-pots, care for a little bet?

No? All right, l'll lay it with you.

l bet 100-1 that your Sheriff Principal has only half a little finger on his left hand.

This isn't the road to Inveraray at all. This road goes south!

l know the way, miss.

l win, l think.

- Blast. - Bad luck, boys.

All right, miss, get out.

- What's happened? - Get out.

We'll have to change the wheel. There's a spare in the back.

What about him?

Fix them together.

Get in.

As long as you stay, he stays.

This must be fate, Fisher. Pity you're not my type.

Pity you're not mine.

Look out, she's going!

Don't worry, we're all right.

Hang on, we're coming in to land!

(Yells)

Come on, Fisher, we'll have to run for it, our friends are armed! Come on.

- l won't! - Come on!

l won't!

Let them put a wheel on that one!

(Man) There it is! (2nd man) Yes.

Now which way?

Come on!

(Boat engine approaching)

- Come on, Fisher! - Oh, let's sit down for a bit!

There's no time. Anyway, it's good training for netball.

That's not funny.

There's no time for sightseeing.

Oh, what's the use of all this?

What possible chance can you have...tied up to me?

That's a question for your husband, if you ever get one, which l doubt.

You're the white man's burden, all right.

That pleases me. Anyhow, those policemen will find us when it gets light.

Oh, l don't know, it's not very late. We've the whole night ahead of us.

- And they're not policemen. - Still sticking to that, are you?

Give me strength!

Listen to me, either l'm telling the truth or l'm not. You agree?

- Well? - If l'm not l'm just a common murderer

who only two days ago knifed a woman in the back.

You're alone with me on a dark and desolate moor,

with a man who'll stop at nothing to get rid of you.

- Do you prefer that? - l'm not afraid.

You ruddy well ought to be. Now, if l tell you to do anything, jump to it!

- Ow! - ''Ow''? Can't you say anything else?

Come on, Fisher.

(Dog barking)

Now, then...

You back me up in everything l say or do.

- Understand? - l suppose so.

Right! Come on, then.

Oh, you're too late for a drink, it's way past time.

Yes. Well, we had an accident, our car ran into a bridge.

- You mean you'll be wanting to stay? - Yes.

- You'll be man and wife, l suppose? - Yes.

- No luggage? - We had to leave that in the car.

l could lend the lady a nightgown.

McDougal, the book!

- Would you mind signing? - No. Good evening.

l'll away up and put a match to your fire. We've just one room with one bed

- but you'll not be minding that. - No.

Will you be needing supper?

Er, can you send up some sandwiches? And a large whisky.

- Two large whiskies. - Very good, ma'am.

Thank you.

You'd better sign the register, darling.

You must get used to using your new name.

Mr and Mrs...Harry Hammond...

Hammersmith, London.

- Thank you. - Oh, well...

lf you'll come upstairs l'll show you to your room.

(Door opens)

There you are. It's perhaps not what you'd have chosen yourself

but it's better than nothing when there's a man about.

Slip off that wet skirt, l'll have it dried in the kitchen.

No, don't bother, it will dry just as well here.

- Thank you anyhow. - No doubt your man'll take care of you.

- Of course. Come on, darling. - Oh!

Here's what they ordered. Are they man and wife?

l dinnae ken and l dinnae care

but they're terribly in love - he never leaves her side.

Reminded me of our courting days.

Take the tray, woman, and don't be so damn soft.

l'm not going to stay in this room with you all night.

Lord, give me patience. Fisher, there are 30 million women on this island,

why did l have to pick you? Where can you go without me?

l shall tell them the story and they will call the police.

- But you don't care about me? - No.

- (Knock at door) - Quick, sit on my knee.

Come in!

There you are now.

- Just thawing out. - l can see that.

ls there anything else you'll be wanting?

- No, l don't think so. Is there, darling? - No...darling.

l'll away to my own bed, then.

Please don't go away!

Why, dearie, is something wrong?

- No, of course not, Mrs...? - McDougal.

Mrs McDougal, she wants to tell you the truth.

We're a runaway couple.

Oh, l kenned it all the time!

And they're after you - is that what's wrong?

Y-Yes, they are after us. You wouldn't give us up, would you?

Of course we wouldnae give you up, not the McDougals.

A good night to you both - you'll not be disturbed, l promise.

- Good night, Mrs McDougal. - Good night. Sweet dreams.

Poor old Fish. You are having a night, aren't you?

Here, drink this up, it'll do you good.

You know, you are a bit damp. l wouldn't like you to get pneumonia.

Why don't you take it off? l won't mind.

- Thank you, l'll keep it on. - As you like.

Sl�inte mhath.

My stockings are damp, l'll take those off.

That's the most sensible thing you've said tonight.

Want any help?

No.

(Miss Fisher) Oh...

Here, wait a minute.

Voil�.

Here.

Thank you.

Come along, Miss Fisher. Place yourself on the operating table.

All right, you needn't look so alarmed, this is armistice night.

And l'm half asleep on my feet as it is.

- l won't lie on that bed. - We're chained, you can't avoid it.

Come on!

- Ow! - (Chuckles)

l wish you'd stop saying, ''Ow''.

ln a respectable house like this it might be misinterpreted.

Good night, my love(!) Further orders in the morning.

Mmm.

(Sighs)

Good night.

Good night.

(Groans)

(Grunts)

(Rattles)

(Grunts)

(Creaks)

(Creaks)

No, we followed 'em all over the place. The car's a complete write-off.

- Yes, of course it was. - (2nd man) l'll have the whisky hot.

- (McDougal) Aye, l'll fetch some. - No, we had to take the girl.

He tried to persuade her to phone up the Yard.

No, no chance now.

Yes. Yes, that's all we can do.

All right. Goodbye.

Logan's moving. He says with Hannay on the loose he's got to.

So it's the 39 steps, tomorrow night at 1 1 :17.

- How about Boomerang? - He's calling at the palace for it.

Your toddy, sir. That'll be five shillings.

- Is this place residential? - Aye.

- You must get a few people in. - Aye.

- Do you have anyone in tonight? - Aye.

- A young couple, by chance? - McDougal!

What sort of daft body am l married on? Do you want to get us all jailed?

- How much were these? - Five shillings.

Here, now out - and dinnae let on you got a drink here after hours.

- Out now, no arguments. - Look, we came here...

- What kind of a hotel is this anyway? - What were you doing, McDougal?

Risking our livelihood!

You old fool.

You'd give the young couple away, would you?

Good morning.

Hello, Fisher. How did you get out of this?

My tiny hand, et cetera et cetera, and a bit of soap.

Oh. Why didn't you run away?

l was going to, then l found out you had been telling me the truth

- so l decided to stay. - Oh.

Why this sudden change of heart?

Those two men came here and l heard them telephoning.

- What did they say? - Somebody's moving.

And they'll call for Boomerang at Buckingham Palace.

- Buckingham Palace? Anything else? - Something about the 39 steps.

Come on, come on.

39 steps, tomorrow night at 1 1 :17.

(Mutters)

Hm.

- Which is their room? - They left after they telephoned.

Oh, Fisher - why didn't you wake me up?

That gives them four or five hours' start.

l've got to get to London and find out about those 39 steps.

- You too. - But...

Oh, to blazes with netball, this is important! You must tell Scotland Yard.

- What will you do? - Go to Buckingham Palace.

Obviously somebody meets somebody there - maybe Logan.

- They said Buckingham Palace? - He said, ''The palace''.

lt could be another palace. Kensington...or Lambeth.

- Or... - Oh! l've got it! Of course!

The Palace Music Hall! Fisher, you're wonde_ul!

(Drum roll)

Hey...ho!

- Won't you take your seat? - May l leave my friend's ticket with you?

- What name, sir? - Miss Fisher.

- Very good, sir. - Right.

- Well? - It's no use, they won't believe us.

- Who did you see? - The assistant commissioner himself.

They're more anxious to get you.

Did they check the Boomerang security?

- Yes. Nothing's missing. - But there must be.

You heard them say they'd got it.

(# Fanfare)

Shouldn't we go? The police may have followed me here.

No. Wait a minute. This next turn may be interesting.

- Sorry, sir, nobody's allowed to leave. - What's the big idea?

(# Trumpet fanfare)

Now, it's my pleasure to introduce you to one of the most remarkable men alive.

'A human encyclopaedia of facts and figures.

'He has baffled the scientists of five continents#

Here to answer your questions, whatever they may be,

none other than Mr Memory!

(# Upbeat theme)

Thank you and good evening, Iadies and gentlemen.

Before we begin l must tell you that l am not a magician.

l cannot tell you whether your future life partner will be blonde or brunette

or how many children you can expect...

May l borrow those, please?

..nor whether Uncle George will remember you in his will.

Thanks. l've got it. l've got it. Of course there's nothing missing

but there would be if they got Mr Memory.

All the information's in his head.

Sporting, scientific, geographical, political and historical.

(Whispers) You see? All the facts and figures and details of Boomerang

are borrowed, memorised by him and then put back before they're missed.

Some gentlemen here would like to speak to you, sir.

- Richard Hannay? - There's something you must know...

- Just come quietly. - But that man...

Please!

And the next question, please?

Where are the 39 steps?!

Come on, answer me! Where are the 39 steps?! No!

(Audience chattering)

The 39 steps...

are on the South Bank in Chandler's Reach just below New Cut.

The headquarters of an organisation known as...

- (Women scream) - That's the man!

(Panicked shouting)

(Gunshot)

Are the girls ready? Bring them on!

(# Jazz)

What do you know about Boomerang, Mr Memory?

Only what l learnt of, sir.

lt was a big job, sir. Biggest l ever tackled.

The weight of the booster end

is proportional to the force of the velocity.

Beam strength varies as a function of C squared over R.

Fusion temperature is limited by wavelength

which is not less than 50 micro-cycles beyond the time of day.

Am l...right, sir?

Quite right, old chap.

He's gone.

You are late.

Uh-uh. After all, we don't know where it's been, do we?

For once, Fisher, you may be right.