Original subtitles

♪♪

♪ I really believe ♪

♪ When I see your face ♪

♪ My eyes just dilate ♪

♪ But I can't erase ♪

♪ That I want to violate ♪♪

Hey, look. Parker's here.

Yeah?

You're not looking?

He looks really cute in green.

Teal.

He's reflected in the mirror.

You know, when you spend

all week with a boy,

you are allowed to look at him directly.

Not all week.

We hung out moderately incessantly,

but we're not here together tonight.

You know, I don't want to crowd him.

Hey.

You guys ready to load up and go?

Almost.

Buffy's looking at Parker,

who, it turns out, has a reflection.

So big plus there.

Buffy's having lusty wrong feelings.

No, I'm not.

No, you're not.

Oh, I so am.

No, they're not wrong feelings,

'cause there's no wrong.

You're free. You're both grown-ups.

You are free, right?

Hi.

Hi.

I just wanted to let you know

I'm heading out.

And it's not real safe around here,

so, if you, you know, walk back to your dorm...

How silly of me not to plan ahead.

Bye.

See you guys.

That was, like, the best set ever.

We'll do great in L.A.

We're gonna have them glued to their seats.

Uh, Devon?

Aren't they supposed to dance?

Well, we can glue them to the dance floor.

I don't mean with real glue.

You got that, right?

I got that.

Willow?

Harmony, hey.

Hey, I haven't seen you since...

Since graduation.

Big snake, huh?

Yeah.

So how was your summer vacation?

Oh, well, I was gonna go to France, but I didn't.

I was dying to see the stores.

Oh, and museums.

Museums?

Yeah, I heard they had them.

You know, just a rumor you pick up on the streets.

You're always so funny, Willow.

You haven't changed a bit.

No, you neither.

Oh, maybe a little.

Aah!

Back off, Harmony!

Okay, fine.

Hide behind your boyfriend,

but guess what?

I have a boyfriend, too,

and he's gonna be mad

that you were mean to me.

Hobbies?

Yeah, hobbies, interests.

I feel like there's so much

I still don't know about you.

What do you like to do?

Well, mostly I hang out

and do stuff.

Yeah, I was into that for a while.

What's that?

What's what?

You have a scar.

Right.

Um...

Angry puppy.

So, do I get to see any of your scars?

Oh.

Oh, mine are all psychological.

Oh, please. Those are the best kind.

Well, my father died last year.

Oh, god. Parker, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to bring up that stuff.

Oh, bad, bad Buffy.

No. I'm OK to talk about it now.

I'm not doing the deep get sympathy routine.

I mean, don't you just hate guys who are all.

"I'm dark and brooding, so give me love."

I don't think I've ever met that type.

I just wanted to say that

what made it so sad

was that there was, oh, a lot of stuff

he didn't get to finish.

It made me think about

you know...

Living for now.

I think about that sometimes.

Yeah, I sort of...

Drowned a couple years ago,

but I came back, obviously.

But I don't... i don't put stuff off anymore,

like you were saying.

That's great.

I mean, everybody says they get it.

Oh, man, me, too. Live for today,

but what they really want

is an excuse to goof off

and not study for finals.

Also a valid life choice.

It's cool to find someone else who understands.

So, Parker Abrams,

when you go to sleep tonight,

what are you gonna regret not doing today?

I am going to regret

being too nervous to ask you

to go to the party at wolf house tomorrow night.

Do you want to go to the party... yes.

I'm not enjoying this.

Well, shelve them correctly and we can finish.

I don't get your crazy system.

My system? It's called the alphabet.

Huh. Would you look at that.

You should lock your door.

Believe me, I am kicking myself.

Anya?

Last time I saw you fleeing in terror.

How'd that work out for you?

I need to talk to Xander.

Go away.

Xander, come with me.

Your mother said you were working here.

Yeah. Need some money, and...

So, where is our relationship going?

Our what? Our who?

Relationship. What kind do we have,

and what is it progressing toward?

I...

Uh, we have a relationship?

We went to the prom.

Yeah. On our one and only date.

Second date called on account of snake, remember?

And there's the whole you used to be

a man-killing demon thing,

which to be fair, is as much my issue as it is yours.

I can't stop thinking about you.

Sometimes, in my dreams, you're all naked.

Really?

You know, if I'm in the checkout line at the Wal-Mart,

I've had that same one.

So, I can assume

a standing Friday night date

and a mutual recognition of prom night

as our dating anniversary?

Anya, slow down.

In fact, come to a screeching halt.

See, these things kind of have to develop on their own.

All right. How?

I don't know. It just...

Happens.

This is it.

My door.

Wood.

Maybe some kind of wood veneer.

It's nice.

Hey. Hi.

Hi. Uh, remember Harmony?

She's back from her summer vacation,

and she's a little different.

Different.

Paler.

Is your neck okay?

Neck. Paler.

Puppy. The angry puppy.

Yeah, we came to warn you

about the... Angry puppy.

Uh, uh, I'm...

I should really take care of this now.

I'll pick you up tomorrow night for the party?

I can't wait.

Band-aid, now.

Thank you.

Harmony's a vampire?

She must be dying without a reflection.

She just made me so mad.

"My boyfriend's gonna beat you up."

My boyfriend?

Well, I mean, if you believe her.

She always lied about stuff like that.

"Oh, he goes to another school.

You wouldn't know him."

Uh, Devon dated her for a while,

but she was too flaky for him

which, stop and marvel at the concept.

Guy dating Harmony dead.

Must be, like, the most tolerant guy in the world.

Hi, baby. I'm back.

It's definitely the crypt, Ryan?

I'm not keen on tunneling into someone's septic tank.

It's the crypt.

The radar soundings are clear.

Uh, the walls are thinnest here at the bottom.

We have to tunnel from underneath.

More work, but, uh...

I'm sure that you...

You'd better be more than sure, mate,

'cause I'd hate to have to hurt you.

I... i swear. I swear.

How's my little Blondie bear?

Harm, does this look like a good time to talk?

Are you gonna kill Willow today?

'Cause I want you to say,

"this is for messing with my sweet girl."

And then... You know...

Nobody knows I'm here.

Now, I'm not killing the slayer's best friend,

as that would tend to announce my presence,

and we're too bloody close.

You almost killed her last year.

Suddenly it's a big deal?

Sod off!

Hmm? Go eat something. I've got work to do.

This one tastes funny. Take me out to eat.

He's perfectly fresh.

I think I had a math class with him last year,

and I didn't like him that much then either.

Harm!

I want to go to a party!

Rowr!

Oh... Right here, baby?

In front of Ryan?

You'd like that, wouldn't you?

Maybe I would.

After a party.

Ha ha ha!

Tonight...

I'll take you somewhere nice.

♪♪

♪ Standing in the pouring rain ♪

♪ You couldn't even be there to pick me up ♪

♪ Taking me for granted again ♪

♪ You're running out of time and you're out of luck ♪♪

This is some party, huh?

The last days of Rome.

It's better. No old Romans.

You wanna dance?

No! Let's have a meaningful talk instead.

Spike.

And Harmony.

Buffy.

Hi.

What a cute outfit...

Last year.

Well...

This is interesting.

It's, uh... Sort of a double date.

Looks like your friend

started the party a little early, huh?

Say... Let's have a look at the new boy.

Hi. I'm Parker.

I like him.

He's got, um...

What's the word?

Vulnerability.

And you're with Harmony.

What, did you lose a bet?

Hey!

Actually, uh, how we met?

It's, um... It's a funny story, really. It's, uh...

Stay here!

What's the matter, spike?

Dru dump you again?

Maybe I dumped her!

She left him for a fungus demon.

That's all he talks about most days.

Harm!

We are going.

It isn't time yet.

Yeah, but as soon as we have the gem of Amara,

you're gonna be sorry... grr!

What... ow!

Come in.

Anya.

Hi again.

Your mother sent me around

from the front of the house.

She also said to ask you to add fabric softener when the timer goes off.

Can we talk some more?

Yeah. I suppose.

Would you care for something?

I have cranapple.

All right.

You know, it is customary

to call before you show up.

Not that...

Yeah. Spike with Harmony,

if you can believe it.

I couldn't figure out why he ran away,

but Harmony said something,

why they were here.

They were looking for the gem of something.

Um... Amara.

The gem of Amara. Are you sure?

Yeah. What's up?

Uh, it's just it's so... It's not real.

It's like the vampire equivalent

of the... The holy grail

and a source of some... Enormous power

which is conveniently vague.

I think... here it is. Yes. Um,

"there was a great deal of vampiric interest

in locating the gem during..."

Oh, "tenth century."

"Questing vampires combed the earth,

"but no one found it.

It was concluded that it never existed."

Well, spike seems to think it exists,

and he's looking in sunnydale.

Yes. Well, I'll research it as best I can.

You've done all you can for tonight. Go to bed.

Uh-huh. Sleepy. Yawn.

Bye.

Is Antonio Banderas a vampire?

No.

Oh.

Can I make him a vampire?

No.

Wait. On second thought, yeah.

Go do that.

Take your time.

Do Melanie and the kids as well.

Hey, I don't have a pulse.

Cool!

Can we eat a doctor so I can get a stethoscope

and hear my heart not beating?

Harm...

What does it take to get you

to shut the hell up?!

And if my heart's not beating...

Then what are all these veins for?

I'm simply covered in these blue veins.

See?

♪ I can see you in my past ♪

♪ But this time's been so alone ♪

♪ Can't seem to find you ♪

♪ But I've come to take you home ♪♪

We've got an extra set of chains.

Ew.

Just because dorkus went in for that...

Drusilla.

Whatever.

Say her name.

Dorkus.

Bite your tongue.

Do it for me.

At which point the matter is brought to a conclusion

with both parties satisfied

and able to move on with their separate lives and interests.

To sum up, I think it's a workable plan.

So...

The crux of this plan is...

Sexual intercourse. I've said it, like, a dozen times.

Uh-huh. Just working through

a little hysterical deafness here.

I think it's the secret to getting you out of my mind.

Putting you behind me.

Behind me, figuratively.

I'm thinking face-to-face for the event itself.

Ah.

Right.

It's just we hardly know each other.

I mean, I like you,

and you have a certain...

Directness that I admire.

But sexual interc...

What you're talking about...

Well...

And I'm actually turning into a woman as I say this...

But it's about expressing something.

And accepting consequences.

Oh, I have condoms.

Some are black.

That's...

That's very considerate.

I like you.

You're funny, and you're nicely shaped,

and frankly, it's ludicrous to have these interlocking bodies

and not... Interlock.

Please remove your clothing now.

And the amazing thing...

Still more romantic than faith.

Fabric softener.

Parker.

I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to find you.

I was getting a little worried.

I'm so sorry.

It's just...

The English guy is, uh... An old friend,

and, uh, he's not supposed to drink,

and I saw him here, you know, in the land of the beer.

Buffy, it's okay.

You did a good thing for your friend.

Did, uh...

You and he use to, like, go out or...

Oh.

Mmm. Um...

No.

No. We really...

Really didn't.

Good.

Now we have time to make up for.

Think I could get a dance

with the prettiest girl at the party?

And what'll I do,

just stand here and watch?

♪ It was a Monday ♪

♪ When my lover told me ♪

♪ Never pay the reaper ♪

♪ With love only ♪

♪ What could I say to you ♪

♪ Except I love you? ♪

♪ And I'd give my life for yours ♪

♪ I know we are ♪

♪ We are the lucky ones ♪

♪ I know we are ♪

♪ We are the lucky ones ♪

♪ I know we are ♪

♪ We are the lucky ones, dear ♪♪

Well, I declared pre-med, but I hated it,

so I switched to history.

History?

Fascinating dates and compelling places.

But there's something amazing

about these huge events

that when you dig down into them,

they're all about people.

Just regular people trying to make choices.

When you look back at it,

it seems like people were swept up in events

they couldn't control.

But I don't believe that.

You always have a choice with everything you do.

Is this okay?

Because I could stop if you wanted.

It's your choice.

What are you doing?

Making a choice.

♪ I know ♪

♪ I know ♪

♪ I know ♪

♪ I know ♪♪

Hey, this is Buffy and Willow.

We're not in right now, so please leave a message.

Buffy, you there?

Call me. I need to talk to you right away.

♪ We are, we are the lucky ones ♪

♪ I know we are, we are the lucky ones ♪

♪ Dear, dear ♪

♪ We are the lucky ones ♪

♪ Dear, dear ♪

♪ We are the lucky ones ♪

Parker?

Okay...

Just...

Shirt.

Pants.

Everybody needs pants.

Hey, you're up.

You're here.

I live here.

Uh, I just...

I didn't know where you were.

It seemed like you were gonna be out for awhile,

so I ran out for coffee.

It's better than what I've got around here...

Warm soda and breath mints.

Breath mints.

I wouldn't be turning them down right now.

So, do you have plans today or...

Actually, my mom's coming to visit.

Oh.

Well, I'll just clear out, then.

But maybe we could, um,

you know, talk or something later?

Absolutely. I'll give you a call.

Great.

Oh, um, one more thing before I go.

A kiss.

Well, I was going to go with pants, but, uh...

Kiss is good, too.

So I'm over you now.

Um...

Okay.

Okay?!

Yeah.

Harm, what are you doing?

I'm writing "spike loves Harmony" on your back.

Why?

I don't know. It's fun. I'm bored.

You can write on me.

Gotta get back to work.

You love that tunnel more than me.

I love syphilis more than you.

Um, good morning.

Giles.

I... i didn't know you were here.

Oh, really?

Um, i... i was, uh, studying.

At the library.

All... Saturday... Night.

Uh...

You know what?

I'm an adult and it's none of your business where I was.

I'm sincerely relieved to hear it.

Now, um, can we discuss the impending disaster?

Giles found something.

A text. It refers to the gem of Amara

as residing in the valley of the sun.

Demon fancy talk for sunnydale.

It seems that spike may know what it's about.

The gem may exist after all

in sunnydale in a sealed underground crypt.

Why don't you guys try and locate the crypt.

I'll see if I can find spike before he gets there.

We'll get started.

I'll call Xander and oz, have them meet at your place.

Right.

It happened, right?

Did it happen with Parker?

Yeah, it happened.

Well, and? Details. I mean, not details. I don't need a diagram,

but you know, like maybe a blurry watercolor.

It was nice.

It was really nice.

He's gonna call.

Oh, I love this part.

Don't you love this part?

When it's all new

and everything's a discovery.

I don't know.

I guess I do.

It's here!

I knew it was here.

We're close now.

No one leaves the lair till we're in.

I don't want the slayer

tracking anyone to the tunnel.

And that means you, harm.

You're an indoor kitty now.

But, spike, you said you'd take me places.

You said we'd go to France,

and now I can't even leave the lair?

Listen to me,

you stupid bint,

this gem is everything.

I came back to sunnydale for it,

a place which has witnessed

some truly spectacular kickings of my ass.

Now...

When I have the gem,

they all die. Don't worry.

But until then stay inside.

And by the way,

I would be insanely happy if from this point on

I heard bugger all about sodding France!

I don't know why I let you be so mean to me.

Love hurts, baby.

♪ Water turns to sand ♪

♪ It turns to sand ♪

♪ Follow me, I'm going underground ♪♪

You've got one new message at 9:05 P.M.

Hi, it's me. I'm at giles's.

Did Parker call yet?

♪ Lend me your fire so I can burn ♪

♪ Save all my ashes for my return ♪

♪ Not with a scream, but with a sigh ♪

It's real.

Ooh.

Pretty.

Can I take stuff?

Take whatever you want, I don't care.

Ew.

Like you're too good to work a clasp.

So?

Is it doing it?

Do you feel it?

I mean, you don't look any different...

If you wondered.

I thought maybe you'd look taller

or glow or something.

Aah!

You should put some butter on that.

But, hey, maybe it's worth money anyway.

That would be something.

And then we could go to France.

And I always wanted to go to France and stay in a chateau.

You could take me shopping and...

I can't believe you just did that.

Hold on.

What are you doing, you big freak?

That's my gem.

Fine. Fine.

If that's all that matters to you,

then just take it! Take it!

Take it and get out!

That's a good idea.

I think I'll go play outside.

Okay, either I'm borrowing all your albums or I'm movin' in.

Oz, there are more important things than records right now.

More important than this one?

Um, I suppose an argument could be made for...

Whoa, Giles has a TV.

Everybody, Giles has a TV.

He's shallow like us.

I got to admit, a little disappointed.

I... i... i...

Well, maybe it doesn't work.

It's... it's like art.

And in breaking local news,

area residents face traffic disruptions...

Public television.

Look, look, come on, everyone,

we have vital work to do.

Watching television is not gonna help us right now.

Near the uc-sunnydale campus.

Officials attributed the unusual occurrence

to weakening of the topsoil support nearby.

City work crews deny that any tunneling has been done in the area...

Tunneling?

Spike. Come on.

Xander, find Buffy and meet us there.

I mean, it hit me hard, you know...

My dad.

Since then I just don't put stuff off anymore.

It's about living for now.

Parker?

Buffy.

Buffy summers, this is Katy loomis.

What's going on?

Uh, hey, Katy, you're gonna be late for class.

I'll catch up later, okay?

She's a friend of yours?

Yeah, you'd like her a bunch.

So, what's up?

Well, um, you didn't call.

I... i mean, I'd understand if you were busy or sick or something.

It's only been a couple of days.

You need to talk to me about something?

Is everything okay?

Sure it is.

It is?

Sure.

Oh, um, so, maybe do you wanna... Do something?

We could do that. Absolutely.

Great. How about tonight?

Oh... Well... The thing is,

I think I'm supposed to get together with some people later.

Parker, um, did I...

Did I do something wrong?

Something wrong?

No, of course not.

It was fun.

Didn't you have fun?

I mean, watch out how you answer that. My ego is fragile.

You had fun?

Is that all it was?

Well, what else was it supposed to be?

It seemed... Like...

You liked me.

I do...

But I'm starting to feel like you thought that meant... What?

Some kind of commitment?

I mean, is that really what you want right now?

I just... Thought...

Look, I'm sorry if you misunderstood something.

I...I thought things were pretty clear.

I... i didn't mean to mis...

I'm... I'm... I'm sorry.

Look, I really have to go now.

Parker, wait!

I did this all wrong.

No, it's cool. We'll hook up later.

Well, that was pathetic.

What a fantastic day.

Birds singin',

squirrels makin' lots of rotten little squirrels,

the sun beamin' down in a nice non-fatal way.

It's very exciting.

I can't wait to see if I freckle.

Oh, do it again.

It tickles. You know, in a good way.

The gem.

Oh, yeah. The gem of Amara.

Official sponsor of my killing you.

Harmony?

Being a vampire sucks.

Buffy!

Xander, heh, I was looking for you.

You weren't in your musty basement.

Have you seen Buffy?

No. Uh...

About... What happened...

When I said I was over you...

Anya, I don't have time.

Harmony, where's spike?

Does he have the gem?

He staked me and then he took it.

He tried to take it right off my finger.

Like I wouldn't have just given it to him.

I would have given him anything he wanted.

He was my platinum baby and I loved him.

Where did spike go?

Getting tired, slayer?

Xander? Get out of here!

So, you let Parker take a poke, eh?

Didn't seem like you knew each other that well.

What exactly did it take to pry apart the slayer's dimpled knees?

You're a pig, spike.

Uhh!

Did he play the sensitive lad and get you to seduce him?

That's a good trick if the girl's thick enough to buy it.

I wonder what you did wrong?

Uh, too strong?

Did you bruise the boy?

Whatever. Guess you're not worth a second go.

Come to think of it, seems like someone

told me as much. Who was that?

Oh, yeah.

Angel.

Uhh!

Take it off me this way, we both burn!

Really?

Let's see.

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Ahh! Uh, uh, uh, uhh!

I like it.

It's small.

Really worth getting my ribs bashed in.

It's obviously very dangerous, and we're destroying it.

We don't destroy it.

Buffy, any vampire that gets his hands on this is going to be...

Essentially un-killable.

Oh.

I have that gig in L.A. I could swing by.

Thanks, oz.

What's going on? What's in L.A.?

She's giving the ring to angel.

Don't make a fuss.

Buffy, are you sure?

He should have it.

So what I'm wondering is,

does this always happen?

Sleep with a guy and he goes all evil?

God, I'm just a fool.

Well, maybe you made a mistake, but that's okay.

Next time... What?

Parker said it's okay to make mistakes.

He was sweet.

No, it wasn't.

He was saying that so you would take a chance and sleep with him.

He's a poophead.

You're right.

He's... Manipulative and shallow...

And why doesn't he want me?

Am I repulsive?

If there was something repulsive about me, you'd tell me, right?

I'm your friend.

I would call you repulsive in a second.

Maybe Parker and I could still work it out.

Do you think that we could still work it out?

I think you're missing something

about the whole poophead principle.

You know, you go on ahead.

I think I'm gonna go take a walk.

Are you sure?

Yeah.

Grr! Arrgh!