All language subtitles for Alex Drummond - Killer Party

Got it. Got it.

I got him.

Thanks, love.

Ah.

Good morning.

Hey. Hey, morning.

- How was work?
- It was fine. Busy.

It was a late night, huh?

Some big wine collector
came in at 10:00,

didn't leave till 2:00.

At least he tipped well.

Baby girl is kicking
and kicking.

My manager asked how much longer
he can keep me on the schedule.

I told him
till my water breaks.

Let's hope it doesn't
come to that.

**

What's this idiot doing?

Nick.

You got a problem, bro?

You're blocking us in.

So what are you gonna do
about it?

You gonna make me move?

Yeah, I didn't think so.

Punk-ass bitch.

Yeah.

It's over, Nick.
Don't let it ruin your day.

I don't know if you can tell,
but I'm already a bit tipsy.

Oh.

I cannot believe
that there is a person in there,

and pretty soon
she's gonna be out here.

That shit's for real.

- God. You look beautiful.
- Thank you.

And as soon as you pop
that princess out your hooha,

we are gonna have you
working again in no time.

Sounds like a plan.

Nicky, how's the writing going?

Uh, well.

I've been working
on a few things.

- Yeah? Feature or TV?
- Feature.

Oh, Nicky, features
are so hard to sell.

You should try writing a pilot.
Everybody wants pilots.

Put your wife in it.

Uh, one... one second.

Jo, this is too much.
Thank you.

I even got a clown
to entertain the kids.

- That's a stroke of genius.
- I know.

Where should I put this?

Beth!

Yes, Joanne?

- Where were you?
- I was putting the party favors

in the gift bags.

That should have been done
already.

Take that from Nick
and put it in the guest bedroom.

Didn't I tell you
to change that shirt?

- No.
- Well, I was thinking it.

It's hideous. Try something
a woman would wear.

Would you like something
to drink?

Give Nick champagne and make one
of those virgin mojitos

- for our guest of honor.
- Coming right up.

Cute kid.

Thanks.

I'm Nick, Mary's husband.

Congratulations on
the impending bundle of joy.

I'm Zach,
Joanne's flavor of the month.

- Oh.
- Would you mind

putting some suntan lotion
on my back?

I... Joanne hates doing it.

I'd ask her assistant, but she's
got hands rough as rocks.

Use both hands, dude.

Did you read that link
I sent you

about the liberal bias
in education?

Not yet.

- Man, it's scary stuff.
- Yeah, that's good.

Hey.

Oh, wow.

Hello. I'm the clown.

Yeah, style. Here you go.

- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.

Is, uh... Is she here yet?

Yeah, her and her new man.

Come on. Get back there.

Barring the outfit,
he looks good.

An easy chip
from here and a short putt

for a nice, safe par.

Now he can't afford to fall
any further behind the leader.

Now to the 18th and...

- How's the job search going?
- No one's hiring.

Blame that on the Democrats.

They're strangling growth
with their obscene tax rates.

You're lucky
you got out when you did.

I barely made 60 bucks
last night.

I didn't tell Sara, but I had to
borrow money from my brother

to pay rent this month.

I haven't paid rent in a year.

Mary's been covering
the whole thing.

So do you have
a name picked out yet?

Nick doesn't like
to talk about it.

Edmund and I decided
that our firstborn

is gonna be named Reagan,
whether it's a boy or girl.

- That's cute.
- After Ronald Reagan.

- Oh.
- So are you and Pat

thinking about
getting pregnant again?

Oh, well, I'm ready,
but he wants to wait.

Wait for what?

I am dying to get pregnant.

- How's the hospital?
- The ER was a zoo last night.

We had gunshots,
beatings, stabbings.

It was like the Lakers
won the championship.

How can you watch that shit?

My grandfather watches golf,
but he's like twice your age.

Do you play?

Hell no. I box.

Golf is something a man does
when he can't do anything else.

I've played golf
my entire life.

It requires an incredible amount
of skill and focus.

It's a mental game.

Whatever.
I just think it's pretty lame,

bunch of able-bodied dudes just
sitting around watching golf.

Hey. Are you that screenwriter?

Screenwriter slash
unemployed waiter.

Most of the stuff I read
is so shitty.

Makes me want to write.

Kim gave me
that script you wrote

about the dudes
who become bounty hunters.

I fuckin' loved it, man.

Um, thank you.

What are you doing with it?

Nothing right now.

We took it out a while back,

had a few meetings,
but... didn't sell it.

That's some straight-up
bullshit.

I would kill to play Wally.

If you want, I could send it
to my agent,

see if he can package it.

That'd be awesome, yeah.

No, no, no, no,
what would be awesome

is making the fuckin' movie.

Seeing your name
up on the big screen.

Yeah.

I didn't know you were gonna
say that. Thank you.

- I love your show.
- Me too.

- I love you.
- This is our girl of honor here.

I don't know if you can tell,
but this is the one right here.

This is Dr. Froman.

Okay. Yeah. Thank you.

You guys have great plotlines.

- I got called in to work.
- Oh, what's wrong?

Apparently some sort
of emergency.

They need all hands on deck.

Can you get a ride?

I'll get a ride.

I love you.

I love you too.

Sara, slow down.

- Pat, I want another baby.
- Whoa.

We've got to talk about that.

We've talked about it.
We are talking about it.

Sara, they'll hear us.

- Who cares?
- Sweetheart...

It's been awhile.

Sara, I'm not ready.

So I'm thinking about
pulling the plug, man.

Go back to New York, work at
the bar, do some theater.

Look at me.
What the fuck am I doing?

Thirty-six years old. I'm more
clueless than when I was 16.

Given my whole life
to being an actor

and all I got to show for it

is I can make a decent
rye Manhattan.

There's other fish in the sea.

If a guy like me wants to have
a wife and kids,

it's not gonna happen
in this town.

You think it's gonna happen
in New York?

The past couple of years, man,

I've been pushing and pushing,
and who am I kidding?

I'm not gonna be
a fucking movie star.

There's always TV.

Tank's on empty.

Cable went out.

Did you try rebooting it?

There's no signal.

Sorry, guys, but Joanne says
it's time to open presents.

Nice to see you again.

Bye-bye.

Feeding actors
is like feeding the homeless.

- Those are adorable.
- Yeah, and delicious.

Who the fuck is that?

Help me.

Hey, you can't come in here.

Call the police.

- It's busy.
- Fred?

- You know this guy?
- Yeah, he's your neighbor.

He lives across the street.
Fred, what happened to you?

She went crazy.
I didn't know what to do.

One minute we were having tea.

The next thing I know, she was
trying to rip my face off.

It's not my fault.
I didn't have a choice.

All right,

everybody calm down.

Fred, can you please
not stab anyone else?

- I will if I have to.
- All right.

We can't get home.
There are roadblocks everywhere.

The police told us to come back
to where we came from

and stay inside.

The radio said
there's riots across the city.

Zach, he needs to leave.

Fred, we got kids here.

I think you should wait outside
until we get some help.

Can you do that?

Hey, asshole,
get the fuck out of my house!

If it looks like a whore
and talks like a whore,

you can be damn sure
it's a whore.

Due to the big bloody knife,
I'm gonna let that one slide.

Hey, sweetie, what's up?

An outbreak?

Who wants your phone?
Hel... Sh...

Shit.

Does anyone have a signal?

I don't have any bars.
Hey, call me.

It's dead.

I'm gonna check on the boys.

You guys, what's going on?

What now?

- Well, howdy!
- Oh, jeez.

- It's the clown.
- Don't open it.

Hey there.
Any room at the inn?

You couldn't get out either?

No, I went this-a-way,
I went that-a-way,

I went every way, but they
told me to come back to start.

This is an emergency.
Knock that shit off.

I'm sorry.

It's just whenever
I'm in costume,

I always try and strive
for a certain level of decorum.

You know, especially
when kids are around.

Yeah, well, the kids
are in the back.

What is...

There's someone at the window.
A man.

Where?

- Did he get in the house?
- I don't know.

- What'd he look like?
- He was wearing a hoodie.

Yeah.

Are you sure you saw someone?

We both did.

I don't know about you guys,
but I could use a drink.

I need to borrow someone's car.

Just stay here, Dave.

I need to be near my wife.

What if it was Mary?

Sorry, Dave,
you're not taking my car.

What am I doing?
Beth, make us some drinks.

Earth to Beth.

There's someone in the backyard.

- Maybe he's on drugs.
- Probably methamphetamines.

They're an epidemic.

I think that's Cal
from next door.

Him and his wife, Peggy,
they have the twins.

Why do you know
all my neighbors?

Because I'm a friendly guy.

Whoever he is, what's he doing
in my backyard?

I'll go find out.

I'm just gonna talk to him.
Maybe he knows what's going on.

Take the kids back in
the bedroom and lock the door.

- Don't try to be a hero.
- Trust me, I won't.

Cal?

Cal? You all right, buddy?

Cal?

They called in
the National Guard.

Yeah, it sounds like
a real shit show out there.

I have a police scanner.
LAPD's on full tactical alert.

This entire city is shut down.

No buses, trains,
even the airports.

Are Peggy and the girls okay?

I can't get in touch with them.

They're visiting Peggy's parents
in Sonoma.

I bet they're fine.

I hope you're right.

What are you doing
back here, man?

I was just asking myself
the same question.

Were you here in '92?
For the riots?

No, I was in fifth grade
back in Naperville, Illinois.

Saw it on the news.

It was fucking crazy.

Oh! Oh, Zach!

No! Get off me!

Die, bitch, die!

God. Grab him!

Outside!

No, please, please.
I don't wanna go!

Get the door! Get the door!
Get the door! Close the door!

- Hold up, hold up.
- Oh!

- Open the door! Open the door!
- Let me in!

Come on, come on.
Oh, my God.

That's so goody,
that's so goody!

Oh, no.

Oh, my God.

No, not the Egyptian cotton,
you idiot!

Ma'am. I'm sorry.

Let me in. I'll be good.

Give me one more chance.

Oh! Ah!

I am gonna kill
that fucking clown!

You're dead, you hear me?

I'm hypoglycemic.
It was an accident!

A mistake!
A faux pas!

Let me kiss it
and make it better.

Have mercy! I beg you!

Don't leave me
out here with him!

Go away!
Just go the fuck away!

I've never been treated so badly
in my entire life!

Hey, buddy.
Do you mind?

I'm trying to have
a moment over here,

and I can't hear myself think

with all the fucking noise
you're making.

Excuse me, sir.

I hate to point out the obvious,

but you're beating a dead horse.

Seriously, friend.

You're starting to get
on my nerves, and I'm a clown,

so that's saying a lot.

Hey, I'm talking to you.

Don't say I didn't I warn you.

I've gotta get out of here.

We're leaving. Now.

- Which way are you going?
- West.

- Laurel Canyon.
- I can run to Cedars from there.

Take me with you.

Please.

When I say get out, you go.
No arguments.

Thank you. Thank you.

Me and my wife love your work.

All right, the coast is clear.
Come on.

It's not our problem.
Let's go.

Hey. It isn't safe out there.

- It isn't safe in here either.
- I think you should stay.

And I think you should mind your
own fucking business, chief.

What the fuck!

It's totally dead.

Did you leave the headlights on?

No, I didn't leave the...

Kim! Kim!

Come on, come on, come on.

It's okay, it's okay.

What the hell's going on?

Th-The car wouldn't start.

God, it was Dave!

All right.

You should, uh,
take your shirt off.

Kim. Come on.

Here.

Okay.

Better not get Hep C
from that asshole.

She'll be lucky
if that's all she gets.

Well, the water's been shut off.

Great.

So we've got no water,
no power, no phone,

and there are crazy killers

roaming free outside
like buffalo.

- I wish I had my guns.
- Mm-hmm.

Damn concealed carry laws
in this state.

You'd bring a gun
to a baby shower?

I'd be strapped 24/7.

Joanne, do you have any weapons?

In case someone
tries to get in?

No, I had Zach.

- There's Zach's golf clubs.
- Those will work.

What about food, water?

Just what's left
from the shower.

You don't have anything
in the fridge?

I don't like having food
around the house. Might eat it.

No canned goods?

Canned goods? Gross.

She gets her meals delivered.

Everybody knows
this is an earthquake zone.

You're supposed to have a week's
supply of food and water.

Even if I did, there wouldn't be
enough for everyone.

- I have some baby food.
- Call me old-fashioned,

but I'd rather starve
than take food from a baby.

Joanne, do you have
any flashlights or candles?

Those I have.

Let's hope the cavalry
gets here soon.

Ah, hey. Good boy.
Sorry. He wants his bottle.

When Dave was on the phone
with Viola,

he talked about
some sort of outbreak.

By the looks of it, we're not
talking about the bird flu.

I bet it's some type
of biological weapon.

A highly contagious one.

If we're dealing
with an infection,

don't you think that Kim
and Joanne are contaminated?

- What do you wanna do?
- We need to quarantine them.

Are you gonna tell Joanne to be
a prisoner in her own house?

You and Mary gotta do it.

- Absolutely fucking not!
- Jo, we're just being cautious.

I throw you
an amazing baby shower,

and this is how you repay me,
by locking me in a closet?

Not a closet.
Just a bedroom.

You and Kim
came into direct contact

with bodily fluid
of people who are sick.

No, Kim was exposed
to Ryan's blood, not Dave's.

- Ryan wasn't sick.
- We don't know that.

Maybe you're sick.
We should quarantine you.

Jesus, Tommy, would you stop
thinking with your cock

and use your brain
for two seconds.

If this is
an infectious disease,

then the people who were bitten
or showered in blood

are more likely
to be contaminated.

Oh, well, my bad.

I was under the impression
you were a waiter,

not a virologist
working for the CDC.

- It's common sense.
- Dave just snapped.

There was no warning.

None of us knows
what's going on,

but isn't it
in our best interests

if we give ourselves some space?

Just a few hours. Hopefully
the storm will blow over.

I say we take a vote.

This isn't a democracy.
I'm the queen of this castle.

The only way
you'll quarantine me

will be over my dead body.

You go, girl!
Mama don't take no mess!

Guys, I'm bored.

Somebody come out
and play with me.

Go away, Dave!

You can't make me.

But you could try.

Why don't you go find your wife?

You were in such a hurry
to leave before.

Fuck her!
I want to be with my friends.

Bros before hos!

Am I right?

Hey! Why'd you kill
my boyfriend, you asshole?

- Tommy made me do it.
- No. That's a lie.

I had nothing to do with it.

Quarantine this, motherfucker!

Get her off me!
Get her off! Get her off me!

Get her off!

I always knew you were
a backstabbing little bitch.

Is she dead?

Well, I feel vindicated.

You sure about this?

I'm just
keeping her company, man.

- If she...
- I don't see any difference

between being in here with her
or out there with you.

I'm sure you wouldn't.

- Be careful.
- Yeah.

You too.

We can't just leave her here.

You're welcome
to take her outside

and give her a proper burial.

You killed her.
You should clean her up.

It's called
"personal responsibility."

I don't work for you,

so save your sermons
for someone who gives a shit.

Everybody, relax.
I have an idea.

It's heavier than it looks.

That's why they call it
dead weight.

Maybe we should say a few words
before we toss her.

Make it snappy.

Jo...

thanks for hosting
our baby shower.

It was beautiful,
just like you... were.

Although you could be
a real bitch sometimes,

you had a great heart and you
really loved your actors,

especially the ones that
made you money.

You believed in me, and that
made me believe in myself.

You were more than my agent.

You were my friend,
and I'm going to miss you.

I hope you're in
a better place now

with lots of wine and sushi
and hot younger guys.

Amen.

Amen.

I'd like to say something.

Joanne, I dreamed of killing you
thousands of times.

You treated me like shit.

Worse than shit.
You treated me like AIDS.

But it's not because
you were a bad person.

You definitely were
a control freak

with some serious
daddy issues, but...

I'm not dead, you asshole,
but you're gonna wish I was!

Oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God!

Sorry, Jo.

No!

Somebody wanna take over?

Oh, God!

I should have chosen
the baseball bat.

I think... I think we got her.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, take it easy.

I just wanted to see
what was going on.

What part of "quarantine"
don't you understand?

We thought
maybe you'd reconsider.

Kim's totally fine.

Tommy, you made that bed.
Now go lie in it.

I can't believe I just bashed
Joanne's head in with a hammer.

Kinda had to be done.

I need new friends.
Those people are so selfish.

And old!

Why do you like me so much?

I don't like you, Kim.

I love you.

And I want to spend every minute
of every day

of the rest of my life with you.

No offense,

but that sounds terrible.

God, not to me it doesn't.

Do you know why we broke up?

I have some theories.

Is one of them
that you try too hard?

I didn't know effort
was a bad thing.

Now you do.

So are you saying
if I was an asshole,

we'd still be together?

Tommy,
I want a man, not a servant.

Women like the thrill of
the hunt as much as a guy does.

It's no fun being with...

someone who's so easily beaten.

And as long as
we're being honest,

sex with you was really bad.

It was like
you've never had sex before.

What?

Oh, well, I'm glad you can get
all that off your chest.

Oh, God, I'm just trying to
help you so that you can change.

Kim, if you give me
another chance,

I promise not to make
the same mistake twice.

Tommy.

Stop asking
for permission and...

just take what you want.

You don't need to hear
that filth.

Kim's totally faking it.

Yes!

Sorry that was... so fast.

Tommy, what did
we just talk about?

Oh, right.

I've had better.

Yeah, right.

Who? I want names.

No, no, I was... I was kidding.

Bullshit. Who's better than me?

No one. There's...
There's no names.

You just said,
"I've had better."

I'd like to know who they are
so that I can find them

and maybe learn
a fucking thing or two.

I-I just said that right...
That's...

I thought that's what
you wanted me to say.

Oh, really?

You thought I would
want to be humiliated

after doing the most intimate
thing two people can do?

You wanna fucking leave?

Go!

- I don't need you.
- Kim, just calm down.

I'll rip
your fucking Adam's apple out!

Oh. You scared of a little girl,
you pussy?

There were no other girls.

You have to believe me.

You said you wanted to spend

every minute of every day

of the rest of your life
with me.

Well, you're gonna get
your wish.

Stay back.

That was sexy.

I thought that you were...

Oh, my God!

I hate to say I told ya so,

but I told ya so.

I don't like sticking my nose
in other's people's business.

Fuck it.

Oh, hey! Oh, no!

I'm not cleaning that up.

Clown's gone.

He'll be back.

You gonna be all right?

You asking if she bit me?

The others are worried.

I held her off.

Tommy...
we gotta do something with Kim.

Can you get the back door?

There's a girl outside.

- I'm going to get her.
- No, it's too risky.

If you leave her out there, you
might as well kill her yourself.

- What if she's infected?
- She's just a child.

We can't take
another mouth to feed.

You guys can stop arguing.

If Dave hurts her,
I'm gonna kill him.

Run. Come on! Run!

- Go, go, go.
- Come on, come on, go, go!

Oh, I can't watch this.

Oh!

Oh, my God!
What's happening?

Holy shit!

Ohh! Oh!

Oh.

Once again,
my instincts were correct.

That is one creepy kid.

Can I just say
what everyone is thinking?

It's obvious
this was a biological attack.

We are trapped in no man's land.

We have no idea
what's going on out there.

You're a writer.
Use your imagination.

I'm trying not to.

Where are the police?

Or the paramedics?
Or the military?

I'll tell you where they are.
They're gone.

Or infected. Or dead.

We're on our own.

I've never been very good
at packing light.

For our honeymoon,
I had three suitcases.

Like big ones.

Poor Pat had to carry my shit
all around Italy for two weeks.

Never complained once.

Times have changed.

I always bring way too much
for him.

Extra clothes, extra formula,

extra food, extra diapers.

And not today.

I had the food in my hand
and I put it back.

Told myself, "You're only
gonna be gone for four hours."

All the politicians
and the fat-cat businessmen,

they are holed up
in some bunker in the mountains.

They're not gonna send help.
They don't give a shit about us.

They can live there for years.
They can wait it out.

So can we.

Nick, nobody's coming
to save us.

I'm just gonna put him to bed.

This is the last of the milk.

We have one more jar
of baby food.

Do you believe
what Pat's saying,

that no one's coming to save us?

No.

I don't believe that.

Hey. Hey, buddy.

I love you, pal.

You sleep tight.

I'm gonna stay in here with him.

Okay.

- Da.
- Okay, hey, hey, come here.

Come here, sweetheart.

Have you guys heard
of an electromagnetic pulse?

It takes out everything
in its blast radius.

Not just the power,
but cars, helicopters, planes.

All the electronics.

That's why Ryan's car
wouldn't start.

We are back to the Stone Ages.

Oh, enough with
the conspiracy theories, man.

Maybe you're right.

Maybe we're totally fucked,

but talking about it's
a waste of time.

All we got is time,

'cause we sure as shit
aren't going anywhere.

If we wanna survive,
we got to be smart.

That's not what Darwin said.
To survive, we need to be lucky.

You wanna leave Ryder
and Sara's lives up to luck?

Clown's back.

We need to all work together.

Can we all agree on that?

I say we sleep in shifts.

You gonna be able to sleep?

We'll pair up.

Tommy and Beth,
Caroline and Ed,

and I'll take Henny Penny.

There's a couple other things
we need to address.

The bathroom situation.

We have eight adults
in a house with no water.

It's gonna get messy in a hurry.

What do you suggest?

Bed pans?

Each of us
gets a pot to piss in,

and each of us is responsible
for the upkeep of said pot.

All right. Take care of it.
What else?

What if one of us is infected?

Or more than one of us?

We still don't know
why somebody turns.

It seems random.

Maybe we're immune.

Maybe some of us are.
But all of us?

Let's... cross that bridge
when we get there.

If we get there.

**

- Thank you.
- Oh. Did you want some?

No, thank you for saving me.

It was my pleasure.

Not that I derive joy
from killing.

Just... glad to be
of assistance.

So do you have a boyfriend?

No.

Girlfriend?

Sorry. You're, like,
totally feminine.

That's not what I meant.

I wasn't implying
that you look lesbian.

You don't.

I have a cousin who's a lesbian.

Stop.

I'm not very good at...

getting-to-know-you chitchat
or, like, any other...

kind of chitchat.

Could've fooled me.

**

**

Hon, if I changed into one of
those things, would you kill me?

I don't want to think about it.

But it could happen.
We should have a plan.

Like a living will.

What if I changed?
Would you kill me?

In a heartbeat.

That's good to know.

I'd do it out of love.

You wouldn't try to trap me,
see if there's a cure?

Hon,

you're so cute.

Are you feeling sick?

My stomach's a little upset.

I think it's from
all those jelly beans I ate.

Just promise me, if I do change,
you'll do it quickly.

I wouldn't want to hurt anyone.

You're not gonna change.

But if I do...

If you do...

Thanks, hon.

**

Who is it?

We're up.

The things
I used to worry about:

money,

auditions, baseball.

I've wasted my entire life
worrying about bullshit.

Baseball's not bullshit.

I'm fuckin' scared, man.

Scared that I'm not

gonna be able to protect
Ryder and Sara.

That I'm not smart enough
or strong enough

to keep them safe.

We're doing okay for now.

We need to do a lot better.

Let's hope that was the clown.

I know this is stupid to say:

I'm really hungry.

Where are all the bodies?

Clown was busy last night.

I have to, um,
empty my chamber pot.

Would you mind watching my back?

I was wondering
when you were gonna ask me out.

Hey, clown!

We're right here!
Come and play us a song!

Come on, you chickenshit!

I don't think he's around.

These balloon animals suck!

I'd like to see you do better.

Let's get outta here.

Beth,
you don't have to do this.

Ladies first.

Oh. Strike one!

Strike two!

Oh, strike three!

Yer out!

You're on deck, my friend!

Where is everybody?

There's nothing
you could've done.

I could've fought.

Then you'd be out there too.

We'll have to fight
at some point.

We're out of food and water.

In theory, we can last
a couple days,

but we don't know
if or when help's coming.

I want to feed my wife and son,

so I'm gonna go find us
something to eat.

What's the plan?

I figure I'd start
across the street

with the guy who stabbed
his wife and go from there.

I'm in.

Me too.

What about the clown?

Or the girl?
Or any other crazy killer?

Look, it's us or them.

We have to be prepared to do
whatever it takes to survive.

They've murdered people with
their bare hands. You haven't.

Sara, do you want to eat or not?

I don't want my husband
getting killed.

It's a risk worth taking.

I'm not gonna stay in here
and let you and Ryder starve.

The longer we wait,
the weaker we'll become.

We don't know how many of those
things there are out there.

There could be hundreds.
Thousands.

If it's too dangerous,
we'll come back.

We're not gonna know anything
until we step outside.

Let's go get some food.

Let's go.

Go, go. Go, go, go, go, go.

- Get in there.
- Come on.

- Come on! Get in!
- Fuck, it's locked.

Keys. You know, over here.
The old guy, the old guy.

Key, keys, keys, keys.

- Ah!
- Oh, God!

Oh, my God!

Come on! Come on, man!

I got 'em, I got 'em, I got 'em.

- Working?
- Come on!

- Fuck!
- Are you kidding me?

- Come on!
- Oh! Shut up!

I got it, got it.

It's clear. Come on.

Get in the fridge.
Get in there, get in there.

Okay. I got water,
I got water, I got water.

Goddamn it.
Okay. Got ya.

Oh, my God.
Dude, all the food's bad.

- Are you serious?
- There's got to be something.

What's taking them so long?

Okay, okay.
We're good.

We're good. Let's go.
Go, go, go, go, go.

Go, go, go.

- Come on, come on, come on!
- Run, run, run!

I love fruit cocktail.

Even sardines in tomato sauce
sounds delicious.

Can't find a can opener.

Who the fuck
doesn't have a can opener?

I'm sure they have one
across the street.

Oh!

- Go!
- Does anyone have a lozenge?

This cough is killing me!

Caroline?

I'm sorry.
I can't help it.

Got it!

Oh, no. Uncle!

- You're it!
- Aaah! Aaah!

Aaah! Guys, mercy!

Let's eat.

Run!

I really wish I had my guns.

Ah!

Let's go. Tommy!

Open up! Hey, open.

What the fuck happened?

She changed.

Bullshit.
That's impossible.

Ed, she tried to kill us.

She was fine five minutes ago.

Then she wasn't.
Just like all the others.

I don't believe you.

You murdered her!

Ed, take it easy.

"Take it easy"?
Fuck you.

Why don't I bash your wife's
brains in with a can of corn

and tell you to "take it easy"?

Don't threaten my wife.

I wasn't threatening your wife,
you moron!

I was trying to make a point.

Ed!

I just wish we could have
kept her alive long enough

for him to see her.

At least then he'd have closure.

You did what you had to do.

What if one of us gets sick?

Just think about Andrew
and the baby.

We have to take care of them
now, that's all.

We're not gonna make it, are we?

Yeah, we will.

Hey, we can outlast
those things.

If it's a virus,

it'll eventually kill 'em.

The clown
seemed to be slowing down.

He was coughing a lot.

We'll be like cockroaches
after a nuclear blast.

Hey.

I'm sorry I've been
so difficult lately.

I just...

feel like I haven't been
living up to my obligations

as a man.

As a husband.

We're a team.

It's not all on you.

I do know one thing
that you can do.

I can't stay here anymore.
You should come.

The others are weak links.

You know me,
I'm Mr. Family Values, but...

in this situation,

family will get your ass killed.

I took my share
of food and water.

I earned it.

You should go.

They're my friends.

They're my friends too.

But I'm not gonna die for them.

That's where you and I differ.

- Good luck, Ed.
- Ditto.

Tell them I said goodbye.

And don't tell the other stuff.

Oh! Whoa!

Tommy, let me in!
Tommy! Tommy! Tommy!

- Let me in!
- No. He wanted to leave.

Let me in! Let me in!
Tommy, let me in!

Let me in.

Help!

Just stay there.

Leaving was a bad idea.

There's so many of them.

They're everywhere.

Ed, you gotta go.

Please kill me.

I don't want to turn.

Please.

I got you now!
You take it easy, all right?

What happened?

What happened?

I'm sorry.

Pat...

We don't have much time.

No.
No, you're gonna be all right.

We'll find a cure.
There has to be a cure.

Sara, I need you
to be strong.

Oh, little buddy.
Sit down over here.

There are so many things
I wanted to tell you.

I thought I'd have more time.

I've got this treasure trove
of wisdom and advice

that I was gonna impart to you
over the next couple decades.

Here are a few of the big ones,
okay, pal?

Treat everybody with respect,

even if you don't like them,
but especially if you do.

Stand up
for what you believe in,

and don't be afraid to look
stupid every now and again

because you're trying
something new.

Listen to your mom, okay?

Be good to her.

She's the most amazing woman
on Earth,

and she loves you more
than you can possibly imagine.

Kiddo,

you're the greatest gift
I ever got.

Always remember that I love you.

I love you, baby.

Shall we?

Let's not drag this out, fellas.

- You haven't turned yet.
- But I will.

And you could end up like me.

Mary and Sara
will be on their own.

Fore!

I promise to take good care
of your wife and kid.

For a guy who was begging
for us to kill him,

you sure are putting up
quite a struggle.

He's right behind me, isn't he?

Think I'll take a rain check
on killing you.

They're gonna get in.

Cockroaches.

**

**