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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:02,680 Hello? 2 00:00:02,920 --> 00:00:03,480 Hello? 3 00:00:03,560 --> 00:00:04,560 Hello? 4 00:00:12,615 --> 00:00:13,640 My boyfriend died... 5 00:00:16,059 --> 00:00:17,460 173 days ago. 6 00:00:18,740 --> 00:00:19,780 It was stupid. 7 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:22,760 He was biking in our neighborhood. 8 00:00:23,310 --> 00:00:24,310 When this... 9 00:00:24,794 --> 00:00:26,800 unattended hot dog cart... 10 00:00:26,801 --> 00:00:30,340 rolled down the hill and knocked him into the Gowanus Canal. 11 00:00:30,341 --> 00:00:34,440 The coroner said he probably died on impact. 12 00:00:36,249 --> 00:00:39,460 I guess getting pummeled by a pile of wieners is better than drowning. 13 00:00:43,129 --> 00:00:44,529 I'm not trying to be glib about it. 14 00:00:45,749 --> 00:00:46,749 I do miss him. 15 00:00:47,440 --> 00:00:48,440 Sam. 16 00:00:49,659 --> 00:00:50,659 I just feel... 17 00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:53,720 I don't know. 18 00:00:55,849 --> 00:00:57,980 I think about him all the time. 19 00:00:59,349 --> 00:01:00,320 I think about smelling him. 20 00:01:00,340 --> 00:01:02,080 And touching him. 21 00:01:03,344 --> 00:01:04,420 Being touched by him. 22 00:01:05,439 --> 00:01:06,919 I fantasize that it's still possible. 23 00:01:08,420 --> 00:01:09,880 Which brings me to Glory Holes. 24 00:01:11,389 --> 00:01:12,720 I think I'm obsessed with them. 25 00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:14,860 Best head of my life at Glory Hole. 26 00:01:14,900 --> 00:01:16,340 87 Rest Stop near Coxsackie. 27 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:18,000 What a magic mountain. 28 00:01:18,060 --> 00:01:18,840 North or southbound? 29 00:01:18,960 --> 00:01:20,100 Geez, this is not okay. 30 00:01:20,180 --> 00:01:21,440 People take their kids there? 31 00:01:21,560 --> 00:01:21,740 LOL. 32 00:01:21,741 --> 00:01:24,400 Sorry dad, but those DL gays gotta get it somewhere. 33 00:01:25,080 --> 00:01:27,140 Homosexuality is still illegal in 64 countries. 34 00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:29,040 I'm not DL and I love Gas Station Head. 35 00:01:29,140 --> 00:01:30,140 Love the risk of it. 36 00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,456 There's a long history of gay men having sex in public. 37 00:01:32,480 --> 00:01:33,500 Cruising, bath houses. 38 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:36,460 Precisely because society keeps pushing us into the shadows. 39 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:37,880 And cause he's hot. 40 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:42,660 Anybody looking to suck near Vancouver? 41 00:01:42,820 --> 00:01:44,360 In St. Louis, sorry, but love to suck. 42 00:01:44,420 --> 00:01:45,860 Have great Glory Hole set up here. 43 00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:47,340 Love getting an unsuck. 44 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:48,920 Jizzin' into the abyss. 45 00:01:49,040 --> 00:01:50,800 I've got a great Glory Hole at home too. 46 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:52,160 Cut a hole in a soft blanket. 47 00:01:52,380 --> 00:01:53,380 Presco suck hole. 48 00:01:56,094 --> 00:01:58,660 At SirArthur here, how big do you cut the hole? 49 00:01:58,661 --> 00:01:59,700 At Benjyboi. 50 00:01:59,929 --> 00:02:01,980 Depends on how big is your dick boi. 51 00:02:02,369 --> 00:02:03,900 At SirArthur here, average? 52 00:02:04,280 --> 00:02:05,320 At Benjyboi. 53 00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:08,120 3-4 inch diameter is usually good. 54 00:02:08,389 --> 00:02:09,389 Where are you? 55 00:02:09,539 --> 00:02:11,560 Want me to come show you how to use it? 56 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:14,340 At SirArthur here, no thanks, just gonna jerk off. 57 00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:15,520 At Benjyboi. 58 00:02:15,640 --> 00:02:17,620 Try lubing up a kitchen glove. 59 00:02:17,900 --> 00:02:19,020 Pretend it's my mouth. 60 00:02:19,300 --> 00:02:20,640 At Benjyboi. 61 00:02:21,840 --> 00:02:22,840 Ehhhhhhhhh. 62 00:02:33,260 --> 00:02:34,260 Ow! 63 00:02:35,340 --> 00:02:37,895 Am I gonna like. 64 00:02:52,715 --> 00:02:52,160 .. 65 00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:53,740 hallucinate? 66 00:02:54,795 --> 00:02:56,780 Psychedelics affect everyone differently. 67 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:05,521 I want you to try to release any pre-existing notions about what a trip should be. 68 00:03:06,540 --> 00:03:07,540 What if I freak out? 69 00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:09,160 Hmph. 70 00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:10,680 That's what I'm here for. 71 00:03:19,130 --> 00:03:20,650 Should I be doing something right now? 72 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:21,760 Or... 73 00:03:33,010 --> 00:03:34,620 What are you feeling in your body, Benjy? 74 00:03:35,500 --> 00:03:36,500 I don't know. 75 00:03:39,250 --> 00:03:40,800 Let's hold space for... 76 00:03:41,880 --> 00:03:42,940 not knowing. 77 00:04:04,970 --> 00:04:05,970 Sorry? 78 00:04:12,790 --> 00:04:15,090 What are you afraid of, Benjy? 79 00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:24,600 Hello? 80 00:04:26,940 --> 00:04:28,100 Sam! 81 00:04:47,840 --> 00:04:50,140 True or false? 82 00:04:51,830 --> 00:04:55,560 We must protect our children at all costs. 83 00:04:59,180 --> 00:05:00,340 True. 84 00:05:03,280 --> 00:05:04,440 True... 85 00:05:05,380 --> 00:05:06,380 or false? 86 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:08,600 Hell is real. 87 00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:13,100 And he is rotting in it. 88 00:05:14,870 --> 00:05:16,500 That's also true, I'm afraid. 89 00:05:18,020 --> 00:05:18,760 One more. 90 00:05:19,020 --> 00:05:19,260 Hm? 91 00:05:19,420 --> 00:05:19,740 Hm? 92 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:22,380 True or false? 93 00:05:24,010 --> 00:05:25,080 It's too late for you. 94 00:05:26,060 --> 00:05:27,060 False! 95 00:05:30,260 --> 00:05:34,040 Let the wicked repent their ways. 96 00:05:34,245 --> 00:05:36,660 And the righteous their thoughts. 97 00:05:37,420 --> 00:05:42,860 Let them turn to the Lord so he may have mercy on them! 98 00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:46,700 That's my boy. 99 00:05:47,780 --> 00:05:48,780 Yeah. 100 00:05:55,500 --> 00:05:56,640 Ma'am. 101 00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:58,400 They're ready for him. 102 00:06:26,230 --> 00:06:27,230 Sam. 103 00:06:27,410 --> 00:06:27,990 Shh. 104 00:06:27,991 --> 00:06:28,991 Shhh. 105 00:06:53,975 --> 00:06:55,340 You gonna piss or what? 106 00:07:00,415 --> 00:07:01,540 You lookin' at my dick. 107 00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:02,120 No, no. 108 00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:02,880 What? 109 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:04,000 I said no. 110 00:07:14,750 --> 00:07:16,850 You didn't even call me a piss, did you? 111 00:07:17,710 --> 00:07:18,710 . 112 00:07:20,510 --> 00:07:20,870 . 113 00:07:20,871 --> 00:07:21,871 . 114 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:46,160 I 115 00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:09,800 really miss you. 116 00:10:10,980 --> 00:10:11,980 Good. 117 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:15,840 That's right. 118 00:10:17,799 --> 00:10:20,500 I guess I'm just embarrassed. 119 00:10:21,999 --> 00:10:23,260 Because of all the glory holes. 120 00:10:24,289 --> 00:10:28,600 I just feel so perverse. 121 00:10:28,870 --> 00:10:29,760 You are perverse. 122 00:10:29,865 --> 00:10:30,865 I'm being serious. 123 00:10:31,839 --> 00:10:32,839 It's not a prison, babe. 124 00:10:33,520 --> 00:10:34,560 It's a portal. 125 00:10:35,940 --> 00:10:37,100 What do you mean? 126 00:10:39,089 --> 00:10:42,540 You're grieving the most formative gay relationship of your life? 127 00:10:43,269 --> 00:10:44,440 What about James Marston? 128 00:10:44,441 --> 00:10:50,260 You're grieving the most formative reciprocal gay relationship of your life. 129 00:10:50,789 --> 00:10:51,789 There's still time. 130 00:10:54,549 --> 00:10:55,620 Oh, bitch. 131 00:11:05,659 --> 00:11:07,680 I don't know how to be gay without you. 132 00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:09,120 Suck a dick. 133 00:11:10,459 --> 00:11:11,459 It's not that hard. 134 00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:13,920 I don't know how to be me without you. 135 00:11:14,060 --> 00:11:14,700 Yes, you do. 136 00:11:14,701 --> 00:11:14,820 You're ready for what? 137 00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:15,040 That one. 138 00:11:15,380 --> 00:11:16,120 I still don't get it either. 139 00:11:16,121 --> 00:11:18,440 I just feel like my heart is gonna explode all the time. 140 00:11:18,570 --> 00:11:19,570 So, let it. 141 00:11:34,350 --> 00:11:35,350 Will you hold me? 142 00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:57,040 I'm hanging up. 143 00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:58,600 WhatsApp not받으셨. 144 00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:02,500 Have you followed? 145 00:12:02,780 --> 00:12:03,780 How long has it been? 8989

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