Original subtitles

Hey. Hey.

Check this out.

Got your mother's day gift.

You want to see it?

Yeah.

Sure.

Is that lingerie?

Yeah.

It's her favorite color.

This is really great fabric.

You like it?

Yeah, it's just... I think she's going to love it. I can't wait.

Are you sure this is going to fit?

Yeah, of course it's going to fit.

This looks pretty tiny.

Underwear is kind of deceptive. This is like my size.

That is not your size, believe me. I took the measurements out. I went

through her drawers this morning, and I wrote down her measurements, and I

brought it up to the woman, and the store gave it to her, so I'm sure it's

the right size.

I know.

that you're my stepdad, but you've been in this family long enough, you should

know that this is not her size. This is tiny.

It's going to fit your mother. Trust me, okay? It's going to look wonderful.

She is way more well-endowed than this. Do you think I'm not kidding when we're

picking out lingerie for my wife?

Obviously, you just might be bad at numbers.

Now I'm bad at numbers.

Well, look.

I'm sure it'll fit fine. Look at this.

Oh, my gosh.

Look. Okay, these types of garments are very deceptive, all right? Because

it looks really big like this. Okay. But it goes all the way

around, right? Yeah, it looks like it's going to be fine. It's totally fine. No.

I'm sure it's going to fit fine. It's extra small.

Seriously, you think mom's an extra small? It is not.

Listen. No, look.

It's not going to fit her. She's going to hate it because she can't even wear

it. And she's going to feel like you can't pay attention enough to her to

know what her size is. Oh, my God.

You don't think I'm capable of doing anything. Have you held them in your

hands enough to know that this is way too small for her?

Apparently not, I guess.

Okay. Well, I guess not because this is my size.

Are you sure about that? No.

No, you want me to prove it to you? Because this is not her size.

Look at this. No.

I'll show you. I'll show you. No, not really.

I'll show you. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing? What?

No. You think that this is too small.

I'm going to put it on and show you. Oh, my God. Are you serious right now?

Fasten this for me. Look.

Are you being serious? If you put it on yourself, you'll see. Oh, my God. Help

me.

It's not going to fit her.

Look how... while this fits me.

Right? Yeah.

So next thing.

What are you doing? Are you seriously going to try the whole outfit on right

now? Yeah.

Look.

Panties. Right?

You're doing this right now.

Panties. They look really big when you put them on.

And this one.

The straps make it look a little weird.

I cannot believe you're doing this right now. When you figure it out, no, look,

look. I can put it on the tightest side.

Even if I put it on the loosest side, it's not going to work.

Damn it.

Yeah, I know. I know I'm right.

See this skirt?

I spent all day shopping for this.

Now what am I going to do?

You're going to have to go back to the same store.

I don't want to feel this.

I don't want to feel the weight.

I don't want to be hanging.

Very firm. I shouldn't be doing this.

You know what?

What do you mean? No.

You've got to know what it's actually like.

Right?

What are you doing?

I was trying to show you that this would really fit me better.

I think you're right.

I don't think I want to try you on now.

oh my god my mouth is just this small

Oh.

Oh, my God.

Oh.

I think

it

does look better on you.

Oh my god, you have two hands like that.

Oh my god.

She's so mad right now. She knew what she was doing.

Thank you.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh,

yeah. Oh, fuck, yeah.

Oh, fuck.

I love you.

that laundry for yourself, huh?

Obviously.

Okay. Let me get out of here.