All language subtitles for S05E11 - Let it snow

I'd hate to fly any tiny reindeer
through this lop.

Yeah, I wouldn't want to be standing
directly under them either.

Merry Christmas!

Ho, ho, ho!

Well, if it ain't Christine Kringle.

You certainly seem to be full of
fa-la-la-la-la.

Well, you know me and the holidays, sir.

Yes, we do.

Here's something I made for you and for
you.

Go ahead, open them.

You made this all yourself?

It's a gavel cozy, sir.

Oh, and it's a beauty.

Oh, Christine, thanks a lot.

What the hell is it?

Seems to be a member of the amoeba
family.

It's a Christmas tree ornament. A
gingerbread man.

It is?

It's made of plaster.

I had a little problem prying it out of
the mold. The arms and the legs fell

off.

Judge, do you have me paged?

Yeah, Art. Why is it so cold?

We'll start on Earth's trip around this
summer.

Art, what I'm asking is, is it possible
to take the chill off the air in here?

I suppose I could go bang Bertha.

Excuse me?

Bertha, the furnace?

You bang her in just the right spot and
she puts out some pretty good heat.

Okay, Art, but be gentle with her, huh?

A tap and a wrap it is, sir.

Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy. Christmas
Eve.

Yeah, there is definitely something
special on the air tonight, isn't there,

Bull? Yeah.

My mom.

Pardon me?

She's flying in for a visit.

Well, that's terrific, Bull. Where's she
coming from?

I'm not really sure.

Her job takes her from one place to the
next.

What is she, some sort of sales rep?

No, skipper of a garbage scow.

Bull, your mother calls refuse?

I know it sounds glamorous, sir, but
success hasn't changed Mom one bit. She

still puts her pants on one leg at a
time.

The good one first, then the pig.

Bull, here's a little something I made
for you. Really, for me?

Just like the one I made for Mac.

How lucky!

A gingerbread man!

No, no, no.

Just

the way

my mom used to make them.

Hey, Judge, did you notice that I got
Bertha going?

Art, we are swooning into pools of our
own sweat.

Hey, when Bertha puts out, she really
puts out. Va-va-boom!

Art, maybe we could turn Bertha down a
couple of booms.

Certainly, sir. I'd be delighted.

What am I going to tell her now?

Yes, the passenger's name is Mrs.
Henrietta Shannon, but she might be

listed as Hank.

I see.

Well, have any of your pilots mentioned
anything about a lady showing the crew

tattoos of her family?

Hello? Hello?

Like I said, it's my little girl's first
Christmas, and I want it to be special.

So do I, Max.

But Renee is only eight months old.

I don't think she's ready for an
electric train set.

If only she'll hear you. Would you quit
saying T-R-A-I-N?

You brought her a trombone?

Can we help you, Bull?

Yeah, want to see a picture of my
mother?

No, that's her pet owl, Spike.

Hasn't left her shoulder in 20 years.

Oh, that would explain the colorful rain
slicker.

That darn hooter.

Look who's standing under the mistletoe.

That goes for you too, shorty.

Our baby is a little young to appreciate
one of those.

Wow, a doodle town flyer with a
chug-chug smokestack. Yes,

I want my little girl to have the best.

You see, some kids never got to have a
train.

Because they didn't eat all their
Brussels sprouts.

You got big plans for the week off?

Going down to Atlantic City. Watch a
couple of guys beat each other up.

I got ringside seats.

Right up where you can hear all the
thuds and grunts and noses going swish.

God, I love Christmas.

You enjoying that gavel cozy, sir?

As much as any human being possibly
could.

You look ready for your big holiday.

I'm anxious to get away from all this
snow.

And this heat.

But we ain't going nowhere till the
prosecution gets here. Yeah, Dan must be

taking care of some last-minute details
for his trip. Where did he finally

decide to go?

Oh, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Hey, man, this Donald be doing the limbo
on Christmas Day.

Hi,

Dan. And I presume this is... the lovely
Mrs.

Fielding. As far as the hotel is
concerned, yes, sir.

May I introduce Miss Nicole Teddy, my
traveling companion to the wonderful

Isle of Jamaica.

Hi there, Nicole.

Is this your first time?

Get real.

No, no, no. I meant, is this your first
trip to Jamaica?

Oh.

Yeah.

I think so.

Well, real nice chatting with you.

Dan, we gotta get to work.

Ah, yeah. All right, darling.

Here are the tickets and our luggage.

I will meet you at the plane, okay?

That's the big thing with the wings.

Oh, yeah. I remember.

What do you think of that body, eh, mon?

Seems to keep her head from floating
away.

I know you're busy, sir, but it's my
mother we're talking about.

Well, could you please take a look by
the baggage carousel?

She likes to ride it sometimes.

Matt, can we zip through this docket and
get the hell out of here? Yes, sir.

Uh, call St. Nick.

What do we got?

Parking in a no reindeer zone?

That's a mutual assault case.

Mutual? I kicked his butt.

In your dreams, fat boy.

Who do you call a fat boy, Robin?

Don't make me take off my cozy.

Mrs. Stapleton and her son, Eric.

Material witnesses.

Oh, boy.

Okay, in view of the presence of tiny
little ears, I suggest that we all couch

our testimony in such a way as not to
destroy any Yuletide beliefs.

Am I making myself understood?

Yes, sir. Well, during his lunch break
at the department store, Santa Claus

here had the urge to, um...

Put something in her stocking.

He, uh, employed my client to be...
Santa's helper.

Right. So then this fellow is... I'm the
elf who handles the money.

Anyway, after the, um... Gift exchange?

Okay, Santa forgot to leave anything
under her tree.

So later then, the dynamic duo
confronted Santa at his workshop.

My boy heard Santa use the most vile
gutter words imaginable.

Have somebody tug on your sack of
goodies and see what you say, lady.

Excuse me, sir, but before you pass
sentence, the storm's got the computer

all messed up. I can't get anything on
Pryor's outstanding warrant.

Oh, boy. Okay, then we will delay the
verdict pending a file search. Mrs.

Stapleton, you and Eric are excused. The
rest of you have a seat. Stick around.

Come on, honey, let's get out of here.

Santa Claus, remember this thing. I want
Moose as a baby brother.

I'm game if you are.

The phones have gone dead. I can't get
through to the airport.

I don't know if my mother's plane has
even landed yet. Can I leave?

Well, you know I would say yes in a
second. Thank you.

Mac,

what do we got?

Forty pages of instructions in
Portuguese.

I was speaking judicially.

Oh, yes, sir.

People versus Ruthie Cook.

Disorderly conduct.

How would you like me to huck up a
boutonniere for that thing?

Your Honor, I move for dismissal. It was
really nothing more than a shouting

match between my client and a couple of
carolers.

Boy, the heat is really stifling in
here.

You're not going to throw that away, are
you?

I was considering it.

What are you going to do, boil it up and
make soup?

Oh, please!

Wanted to get my attention back?

We got a problem, sir.

How so?

The blizzards close down every street in
the city.

Well, that's terrible. Oh, that ain't
the half of it. The snow removal

equipment just piled up ten feet of snow
at our doors.

You mean... We are trapped in here. Oh,
no, we can't be trapped. We're working a

convention at 10.30. She's got to be
wrapped.

I'm the gift that keeps on giving.

I'll lose my spot on the great judge.

Oh, no, no, people. I'm sure this is
only temporary.

So are kidney stones.

How the hell am I going to get to
Jamaica now?

Mac, it's our baby's first Christmas.

She can't have it here.

Everybody, would you please relax?
Believe me, this could be a whole lot

worse.

I hope you people are happy now.

Yeah, you are.

No, it's Bertha. She just blew.

Say goodbye to the heat.

Wait. We're stuck in here for God knows
how long, and even though it's 150

degrees in here right now, we stand a
good chance of losing our precious body

parts to frostbite?

Friendship continue to grow in the
coming year.

Affectionately, Christine.

I can't believe you burned my card.

That's because I can't eat it.

Well, last of the pencils.

Great. That'll hold us another 30
seconds.

Hey, Dan, did you burn my assembly
instructions?

It's a big deal. You stick cab... in a
slot B. Who can't do that?

You'd be surprised.

Matt? Yeah?

I'm a little worried. You think the baby
is warm enough?

As long as you're sure she's in there
somewhere.

Well, here goes my collected poems of
Rod McKeown.

Burn, baby, burn.

Hey, let go. That's mine. Give it up,
Granny. It's a piece of old newspaper.

The hell it is. That's my bedroom set.

Come on, people. We're in a difficult
situation. We're going to have to make

sacrifices. But after all, what are our
few personal belongings compared with

saving human lives? Not my rubber
chicken.

It's okay for us to give up our personal
possessions.

But you don't have to toss your pliable
little pullet into the pot, right?

Fair is fair.

We'll always have Paris.

Hey, stop pushing me.

I was just trying to conserve our body
heat.

Hey, no free samples.

Don't be so selfish.

Do you realize this storm could be the
beginning of the new ice age which will

alter civilization as we know it?

So?

So we owe it to future generations to do
what we must to keep fielding genes

alive.

There's a truly repulsive thought.

What's the matter, chastity belt on too
tight?

Stop it, you scum.

He's got some mouth.

If you want to keep yours, you'll shut
it.

Get your big foot off my caboose.

Christmas Eve, I think we ought to stop
and reflect on what this holiday means.

It's about peace on Earth and goodwill
towards men.

Split his skull!

Hey,

hey! Somebody want to give me a hand?

He got through the snow and he got
caught in a cave-in. Oh, don't drop him.

He might shatter.

What do we do?

Maybe we should rub him and try to get
circulation going.

Wrong. Exactly wrong.

If you do that, he'll be shedding skin
like a frog on the cheese grater.

Are you sure about that?

You don't spend 12 years on the street
without knowing how to deal with

exposure.

Well, then what do we do? First, we
strip him.

Oh, mercy.

Come on, you've got to keep that hot
water coming.

Ever do this with Jell-O?

Okay, that's the last piece of track.

I guess Bertha's going to help us out
after all, huh?

All right, if this works the way I think
it should, this whole train track

becomes a giant heating element.

Where did you learn all this fancy
wiring stuff?

Blowing stakes.

I ain't saying it's seasonal work. You
need a skilled trade to fall back on.

Conley, I think your little darling just
processed her prunes.

You change her, Dan. My hands are full.

What a day to wear a white suit, huh?

Damn it.

What happened?

The whole system shorted out. What are
we going to do now?

I need a good conductor.

Anybody here got a piece of gold?

Oh, no. No, no, no. No way. No way.

Lorenzo, there's a man's life at stake.

Judge, this change costs two grand.

You know how hard she had to work for
that?

Ah, what the hell.

We got a price hike coming the first of
the year anyway.

Sir, he stopped breathing.

You're right. He stopped breathing. Oh,
big fella, don't give up now.

I'll take care of this.

Do you know mouth-to-mouth?

Honey, I practically invented it.

The big worry is, how long has his brain
been without... Oxygen.

I'd say since the early 60s.

I can barely feel a pulse.

Blow harder.

Hey, it's like trying to inflate the
Goodyear blimp.

Don't stop now. Keep going. Hang in
there, Ball.

Come on, Ball. Breathe.

You can make it.

I think you're doing it, Mandy. I think
it's starting to come around.

Ball, are you okay?

How much is all this going to cost me?

All right, this is the one. Now listen,
these people have been trapped without

heat or food for quite a while, so be
prepared.

It's liable to be a little ugly in
there.

It's worse than I thought.

Hey, guys, are we rescued?

Yep. Streets are clear. The phones are
back on. We got hot food downstairs if

you want it.

God bless us, everyone.

Is this guy all right?

Almost done.

Stay for some stew?

Yeah. Flight 678 to Jamaica. I'd like to
change date of departure and get a

refund.

What do you mean the tickets were cashed
in by Mrs.

Fielding?

Sounds like she had brain cells after
all, huh, Dan?

Yeah, and I thought she was perfect.

Which one of you is Bull Shannon?

That's me.

I should have known.

The Red Cross people downstairs asked me
to get this package to you.

It's from my mom.

What does the card say, Bull?

Dear Bull, I have been called to duty in
the Persian Gulf.

I'm towing a crippled tanker back to
port, so I won't be able to visit you

after all.

Oh, Paul, I'm so sorry.

I hope to see you soon.

Merry Christmas to my very special boy.

P.S. I hope you enjoy your gift.

Oh, wow!

What is it, Paul?

You heard the man. Let's get the hell
out of here.

Do we have to?

What do you mean?

Well, look around, Judge. I mean, we
ain't exactly on anybody's A-list for

Christmas parties, you know?

Including our own families.

Tonight is the first time in a long time
I felt like I mattered to anybody.

What happened here was kind of special.

Pulling together, helping somebody out,
sort of sharing.

Isn't that what Christmas is supposed to
be about?

I'll stand lock up if you want.

For that matter, I wouldn't mind
sticking around a little, too, sir.

I find myself suddenly available.

What's a few more minutes, Harry?

The baby likes it here.

Sounds good to me.

What the hell?

Well, if you're all saying that you'd
like to spend Christmas Eve shivering

with a bunch of strangers in an icebox
rather than heading home...

Then I guess I better put a fresh pot of
Bosco on, huh?

Hey, Bull, what is it? I spilled my live
bait!

They're slithering all over me! I gotta
get out of here!

I'm next.

Your Honor?

Yeah?

It's past midnight.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas to you.

Sort of too bad you're not standing
under a sprig of mistletoe right now,

isn't it?

Will you never learn?