All language subtitles for S04E22 - Her Honor 2

Boy, business really looks bad for Bob
and June.

Anybody that would be stupid enough to
pay a quarter of a million dollars for

that dump deserves to lose it.

Delectable taste treats, anyone?

Not right now.

I guess there aren't too many guys
stupid enough to pay $900 for a

Snickers, huh?

He's going to play show and tell with my
vital organs, isn't he?

Kind of a hollow feeling, huh?

Don't worry, Dan. I'm too depressed
about Harry to rip your lungs out.

Maybe later.

I cannot believe this is Harry's last
day on the job.

It won't be the same without him.

No more whoopee cushions in the jewelry
box.

No more courtroom hootenanny.

Some more Jane Pauly look-alike contest?

I never did get my trophy.

I wish I knew which judge was replacing
him.

Trust me, we'll get some old geezer with
a neck waddle the size of a pillowcase.

You're getting me.

You're kidding.

Come again? I just got my first judicial
assignment. I take over Harry's post as

soon as I'm sworn in.

Wait a minute. You mean after two years
of being equal, now you're going to have

complete control and authority over me?

Yes. May I kiss your gavel?

Sam, please don't start sucking up. I'd
just prefer it if you'd act like

yourself. Okay, may I kiss that
little... Sam!

Besides, there's still a way to save
Harry's job.

Right! We call Jerry Lewis in Vegas and
ask him to bring Frank and Dino in for a

benefit concert!

I filed an appeal with the selection
committee.

That's just crazy enough to work.

Oh, poor Harry. This whole thing must
have him really depressed.

Shouts broke his fall.

None of the Girl Scouts were hurt, sir.

Hey, man, I apologize. There was no need
for them to start kicking me.

I have never seen them swarm like that.

Yeah, well, I guess after tonight I'll
have a lot more time to practice my

skating, huh?

Got any plans?

No, not really.

I mean, there's a lot of things I can
do. I just... Figured I'd think about it

for a while, you know? What a damn
shame, sir.

Cut down in your prime.

You were so young and vital.

Oh, come on, Mac. You talk about me like
I'm dead.

You look just like yourself, sir.

As some of you know, tonight is Judge
Stone's last appearance in this court.

So I'm taking this opportunity to pay
honor to him.

In verse.

Ah, a little mutant poetry.

The halls of justice are drenched in
blood.

There are tears on the courtroom wall.

Because the best darn judge in the USA
got the shaft from City Hall.

The nicest to bail it.

The snappiest dresser. The smartest at
deciding.

Manhattan Criminal Court Part 2 is now
in session.

Judge Harold T. Stone is signing.

Oh, Bull.

I cannot begin to describe what I am
feeling.

Although cellulite would be my guess.

Be seated, people.

Sir, sir.

Yeah? This came for you. Special
delivery from Milton.

I mean, Torme.

No, Torme.

See that little line over the E? That's
what they call an accent grave. That

gives you Torme.

Now, for Torme, it would go the other
way. It'd be called an accent aigu.

Aigu? Aigu.

Now, why do you think Mel Torme would
make a mistake like that in your

handwriting?

Well... Nice try, fella. Thank you very
much.

some Frenchie names.

I told you, eh, goon?

Sir, I don't want you to give up hope.
We still haven't heard from that last

appeal, and I've got a very good feeling
about it.

Oh, Miss Sullivan, your courageous
loyalty is surpassed only by your beauty

and brains.

Max, do you sense a shift in the suck-up
wind?

About ripped off my eyebrows. Sue.

Please stop following me.

I don't wish to buy a scooter pie.

Perhaps a bite of our demo would change
your mind.

Bob, is that an almond or a tooth?

Miss Sullivan?

Yes, may I help you?

Just a suggestion. A little less eye
makeup would be more seemly.

Thank you.

Who the hell... are you?

I'm Jane Fletcher.

I'm from the Mayor's Judicial Selection
Committee.

Oh, oh.

I meant, how the hell are you?

Fine, thank you. I have some protocol
papers to give you before you're sworn

in. Oh, thank you. Have we met? Not
formally, but I was the one that offered

your name to be a judge.

You were?

Well, thank you very, very much.

It was really just a bit of good luck. I
noticed you when I was in the courtroom

to evaluate Judge Stone.

I was very impressed by your ability.

Oh, well, thank you.

You were the one that evaluated Judge
Stone?

Yeah.

You're the one who ruined the career of
my best friend?

My bosom companion?

The man I would gladly kill or be killed
for?

No, but I bet she hasn't been with a man
from Sputnik.

That's Mrs. Fletcher.

She's the one who got you thrown off the
bench, sir. What?

Ten-minute recess?

Go on, get your skinny butt out there.

If he gets his job back, I'm dead.

Yo, whoa, Mrs. Fletcher.

Yo.

Whoa.

Are you talking to me? Yes, ma'am. I
thought I might query you as to why my

career has been destroyed and my life
turned into an utter shamble.

But I do have an appointment. Another
time, perhaps.

I'm sure you can squeeze me in.

Am I being kidnapped?

Kidnapped? Oh, no.

You're just being held against your
will.

In a locked room. By a desperate man who
has nothing to lose.

That's a joke.

I've heard all... about your jokes,
Judge Stone.

But apparently the last laugh is on you.

Wait a minute. A little gag here and
there and you're ready to ruin my

career?

Yes.

Although there's also the matter of your
efficiency rating.

What about my efficiency rating? It's
abysmal. It's a black hole.

It's an embarrassment to the judicial
process. In short, it stinks.

Don't beat around the bush with me,
lady.

know that you process 12% fewer cases
than any other judge in your position?

Oh, yeah?

Well, I'm sure there's a good reason for
that.

Oh, I've seen the reason on my visits to
your courtroom. You talk to the

defendants. Well, I thought sentencing
them by singing telegram was

unnecessarily cruel.

You know what I mean.

You seem to make a habit out of chatting
with winos and hookers and bats. As

though they were... People?

Your word, not mine.

Miss Wesker, what kind of judge would I
be if I didn't stop to find out about

the defendant?

Possibly a working judge.

If you'll excuse me.

You know, I don't happen to think it's
very fair to judge people just on their

appearance. I mean, look at you.

Pardon me.

Well, to look at you, someone might
think that you're just some mean

-spirited, sour old bat.

But not me. No, before I'd make a
decision like that, I'd want to know

more about you, what kind of person you
are, because maybe there's a reason,

some hidden trauma in your past, like,
uh, like, I don't know, maybe you were

turned down for the Rockettes or
something.

That producer was blind. My legs were as
good as anybody's.

I mean, that's none of your business.

Let's be perfectly candid, shall we?

What our courts need are judges, not
psychiatrists, not amateur magicians.

Hey, who are you calling amateur?

As far as I'm concerned, the sooner
you're off the bench, the better.

Oh, yeah?

Well, Ms.

Fletcher, if that is your real name, I
still have one appeal left, and I ain't

out of here yet, lady.

Got you going away, cake, sir. Later,
Ron.

Well, pardon me and my tribute.

Sir, we just got the answer to your
appeal.

And? They turned it down, sir.

Let me give you some advice, Mr.

Stone.

Next time, try to find work more suited
to your personality.

Hog the whole thing.

What's next, Mac?

The last case, sir.

Fine. Of your whole damn life.

Thank you, Pippi Longstocking.

Oh, I'm sorry, sir.

Give me the file. No, I can't.

Mac, Mac, Mac, come on. Give me the
case.

Don't make me get out the jaws of life.

Come on, Matt.

It happens. I lost my job. It's not like
it's going to turn me into... A pitiful

wretch like me?

Good example.

Who's he?

The defendant, Your Honor. Former State
Senator Fetty.

You were a state senator?

Of course. You think I was always like
this?

I used to be happy-go-lucky, content, a
real good...

That is, until they booted me out of the
Senate.

Perhaps the dress code was a factor.

Senator Fetty, I sympathize with you.

Believe me, I do.

But I find it very difficult to
understand how a man who rose so high

could stoop so low. You stole an iron
lock?

I thought it was empty.

You know, scrap metal has gone for eight
cents a pound.

It's now over for a grand jury, and you
should be ashamed of yourself, Mr.

Fetty. All right, don't talk to me about
shame.

It's easy to have that attitude when you
have a nice, cushy job.

But believe me, sir, if this could
happen to me, it could happen to anyone.

It could happen to you.

Do I get my iron lung back?

Sir, don't listen to him. He's a bitter
old has-been public official.

Thanks for cheering me up.

What's next, Mac?

Ah, right.

Well, then I guess that's it.

But before I go, I would, uh...

I'd very much like to thank all of you
for everything.

I'm never going to forget any one of
you.

Court's adjourned.

Come on in, guys. I'm just packing my
rabbit.

Got something on your mind? We're all
ears.

We all chipped in and got you this, sir.
I hope you like it.

We had it custom made so it would remind
you of this place.

Oh, that's beautiful.

Look at that, and it's got a little
gavel for a second hand.

I thought it should be a hooker.

Yeah,

well, this is beautiful. Thank you very
much.

Now,

Bull, you promised no tears.

But I never even got to take a bullet
for you, Harry.

Well, maybe we could do it on a weekend
sometime.

Come on, give me a big hug.

I'm so cursed that you're leaving, sir.

of it, sir.

Sorry about you going away, Kate.

No, you're not.

You're right.

Me neither.

I especially like the part where you
cleaned off her face with a fire

extinguisher.

I have my moments.

See you around, Judge.

Yeah.

Sir, look, if you ever need any money,
well... You're broke, I know. Yeah.

If you ever need anything else, like a
badly cooked dinner or an evening with

my in-laws, hey, the sky is the limit.

Thank you, man.

You take care of yourself.

I'm not very good at this sentimental
stuff, but you really knew what you were

doing up there.

I hate to see you go.

Yeah.

Me too, Counselor.

He didn't mess up my hair, did he?

So.

So.

Do you know what you're going to do now?

No, but that's really the best part of
all this. Now I've got time to do the

things I've always wanted to do.

Learn hang gliding, take pottery
classes, try to get you on the sofa.

I'm not kidding.

You know, for some time now, I've...

had some rather non-judicial thoughts
about you.

I can't believe you're saying this to
me.

Well, if it's one-sided... No, no, I
feel the same way about you. You do? I

do. Well, it's funny that we never...
Yeah, well, how could you actually

have... Because a judge and a lawyer are
not... Yeah, that would be a conflict of

interest. Clearly.

But now...

There's nothing stopping us.

But that would be admitting defeat.

I got no problem with that.

Maybe we could get a restraining order.

Hey, hey, Miss Sullivan, I feel like
I've been restraining myself for too

long.

You're a real special lady.

Too special to be off the bench.

There has got to be a way that we can
get your job back.

Like what?

Like it turns out I'm on Dallas and I've
been dreaming all this?

It's life.

Now, you take a look at it.

Sometimes it hands you garbage, and all
you can do with it is the best you can

do with it.

That's what I'm going to do.

What does that mean? What that means is
that it is time that I had some real

fun. There are crazy things that I have
only dreamt of doing. Well, now I'm

going to do them.

When you're ready to face reality, give
me a call.

This was on sale.

Right this way, Your Honor.

All of our lovely new judges will just
go to the conference room for the group

photograph. The mayor can get back to
work.

Busy, busy, busy.

Congratulations.

Bye-bye.

Congratulations, Your Honor.

Oh, thank you, Mac.

Thank you all for coming. It was really
nice of you.

Hey, it was a nice ceremony.

Yeah, the high point for me was when Bo
tried to lead everybody in row, row, row

your boat.

All the ropes reminded me of glee club.

I was kind of hoping Harry would change
his mind and show up. Well, he'll be at

your party, but I don't think he's in
the mood to be around city officials.

Yeah. I wish I'd had one minute alone
with the mayor to talk about Harry. Oh,

now come, come on now.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

There, there, there. Let Danny massage
all the tension away.

Get out, Dan.

At the speed of light, my lady.

Hey, come on. We got a party to go to.
Yeah.

Hey, you guys go on. I think I want to
have my picture taken.

Okay, don't. See you there.

Excuse me. I couldn't see the mayor for
just one minute, could I?

Oh, why, of course.

Call back in October.

It's a matter of life and death.

Okay, September.

sweet potato.

We never have parties this nice.

What about that wing-dang we threw when
Aunt Tilly had her bloat suctioned?

Hi, guys.

Where have you been?

For the last three hours, we've been
sitting here listening to Hillbilly Wrap

-Up.

Where's Harry?

I'm afraid to guess.

What do you mean?

Well, he was here for a while, but he
was acting kind of crazy.

He said he was finally ready to drop the
big one.

Drop the big what?

Joke. The most outrageous, crazy stunt
anyone's ever pulled.

What? What's he gonna do?

He wouldn't tell us. He just said it
would get the attention of the entire

city. He called it the prank de
resistance.

Well, that will get him thrown off the
bench.

Sure, if he was a judge.

I got the mayor to review his records,
and he said that the mayor's committee

made a terrible mistake.

Oh, my God.

Harry's out there right now planning to
freak out Manhattan.