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1
00:00:06,972 --> 00:00:10,402
‐ I really loved the pieces you
submitted in your application.
2
00:00:10,395 --> 00:00:12,645
That troll piece was
fascinating.
3
00:00:12,651 --> 00:00:14,701
So insightful.
‐ Thank you.
4
00:00:14,696 --> 00:00:17,616
Yeah, I've really tried to
push myself this past month,
5
00:00:17,619 --> 00:00:20,539
and, you know, this is the kind
of in‐depth stuff
6
00:00:20,542 --> 00:00:22,422
I could've never done
at "The Thorn."
7
00:00:22,419 --> 00:00:25,299
‐ It is really impressive to me
that someone so young
8
00:00:25,300 --> 00:00:27,560
has such
a clearly defined voice.
9
00:00:27,555 --> 00:00:31,475
‐ Whew, I'm impressed
by everything about you.
10
00:00:31,479 --> 00:00:34,569
[chuckles] I‐I mean,
I would love to work for you.
11
00:00:34,570 --> 00:00:36,240
And I'm kind of a workaholic.
12
00:00:36,239 --> 00:00:38,659
Like, if I'm not busy, I'm sad.
13
00:00:38,661 --> 00:00:40,251
[laughter]
14
00:00:40,247 --> 00:00:42,627
‐ Well, you are
a great essayist.
15
00:00:42,627 --> 00:00:44,337
But unfortunately, Annie,
16
00:00:44,338 --> 00:00:45,878
I do not think
"The Bridgetown Tribune"
17
00:00:45,883 --> 00:00:48,143
would be a good fit for you.
‐ Oh.
18
00:00:48,138 --> 00:00:51,058
‐ I mean, a daily newspaper
is a totally different animal,
19
00:00:51,060 --> 00:00:53,520
and we're looking
for a beat reporter
20
00:00:53,524 --> 00:00:55,444
with a lot of experience.
21
00:00:55,444 --> 00:00:58,034
But I would love to offer you
an internship.
22
00:00:58,033 --> 00:01:00,963
Though I should mention
it's unpaid.
23
00:01:00,955 --> 00:01:02,535
‐ Oh, fuck.
‐ Mm.
24
00:01:02,542 --> 00:01:06,682
‐ Um, it's just that‐‐
that sounds so nice.
25
00:01:06,675 --> 00:01:09,675
I just‐‐I also need money.
26
00:01:09,681 --> 00:01:13,191
‐ Well, typically, our interns
get another job to earn money.
27
00:01:13,188 --> 00:01:16,738
‐ Okay, but this was me
getting a job for money.
28
00:01:16,737 --> 00:01:21,497
Um, you know, I've been
submitting everywhere,
29
00:01:21,496 --> 00:01:23,496
and I assumed that something
would lead to something,
30
00:01:23,501 --> 00:01:25,461
but it's really led to nothing,
31
00:01:25,462 --> 00:01:29,052
and it's been a‐‐
it's been a bad month.
32
00:01:29,053 --> 00:01:33,273
So could you please
just let me work here?
33
00:01:33,269 --> 00:01:35,269
For money?
34
00:01:36,484 --> 00:01:39,664
‐ I'm gonna say good‐bye, okay?
35
00:01:40,910 --> 00:01:42,540
‐ Yeah. Um‐‐
36
00:01:42,539 --> 00:01:44,669
‐ And thank you for coming in.
37
00:01:44,668 --> 00:01:47,298
‐ Thank you.
‐ Mm‐hmm.
38
00:01:47,297 --> 00:01:49,927
‐ That was‐‐that was bad.
39
00:01:49,928 --> 00:01:51,098
[sighs]
40
00:01:51,097 --> 00:01:54,097
[upbeat music]
41
00:01:54,103 --> 00:01:57,443
♪ ♪
42
00:01:57,443 --> 00:01:58,863
‐ [sighs]
43
00:01:58,863 --> 00:02:01,163
‐ Make sure you
face the labels out.
44
00:02:01,159 --> 00:02:02,869
‐ You don't work here anymore.
45
00:02:02,871 --> 00:02:05,251
‐ Doesn't mean I can't, like,
hang out and help.
46
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:07,510
‐ Well, it kind of does,
actually.
47
00:02:07,505 --> 00:02:09,715
And Dave doesn't want you
touching the shelves, so...
48
00:02:09,718 --> 00:02:12,098
‐ I worked here
for five years, okay?
49
00:02:12,097 --> 00:02:14,597
My blood
is all over these shelves.
50
00:02:14,603 --> 00:02:15,983
‐ All right, cool.
51
00:02:15,980 --> 00:02:17,530
‐ I think I can touch
whatever I want.
52
00:02:17,525 --> 00:02:19,025
Fuckin' Dave.
53
00:02:19,028 --> 00:02:20,318
‐ You have to find
somewhere else to be.
54
00:02:20,322 --> 00:02:21,532
How about that?
55
00:02:21,533 --> 00:02:23,123
Because you can't be here
anymore.
56
00:02:23,119 --> 00:02:25,539
‐ Ryan, you don't work here
anymore.
57
00:02:25,541 --> 00:02:27,461
‐ Oh.
58
00:02:27,461 --> 00:02:30,091
‐ Which makes me the customer,
which means I'm always right.
59
00:02:30,091 --> 00:02:32,141
‐ You have to leave.
60
00:02:32,137 --> 00:02:33,967
‐ Mike was stacking
the cans wrong.
61
00:02:33,974 --> 00:02:36,024
‐ I don't give a shit.
This is my business!
62
00:02:36,020 --> 00:02:38,860
Now get out of here
before I call the cops...
63
00:02:38,859 --> 00:02:41,199
or your mom.
64
00:02:41,197 --> 00:02:42,777
MIKE: See?
65
00:02:42,784 --> 00:02:45,464
[Muzak playing]
66
00:02:45,455 --> 00:02:47,125
♪ ♪
67
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:48,835
DAVE: Make sure the labels
are facing out.
68
00:02:48,838 --> 00:02:51,258
‐ I know. Yeah, they're‐‐
I will‐‐they will.
69
00:02:54,348 --> 00:02:55,598
‐ Mom?
70
00:02:57,564 --> 00:02:59,074
Dad?
71
00:03:03,576 --> 00:03:04,996
Hello?
72
00:03:07,124 --> 00:03:10,594
[THICK's "So Sick"]
73
00:03:10,590 --> 00:03:12,760
SINGER: ♪ Ask your dad,
ask your dad ♪
74
00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:16,060
♪ To pay my rent ♪
75
00:03:16,058 --> 00:03:18,608
♪ Maybe we should hang out ♪
76
00:03:18,606 --> 00:03:22,236
♪ We should all be friends ♪
77
00:03:22,237 --> 00:03:24,157
‐ Holy shit.
78
00:03:24,158 --> 00:03:31,128
♪ ♪
79
00:03:36,015 --> 00:03:37,475
‐ Okay, listen to this.
80
00:03:37,476 --> 00:03:39,606
Maureen tells everybody
that her uncle
81
00:03:39,606 --> 00:03:41,066
came up with the ideas
for Hooters
82
00:03:41,067 --> 00:03:43,197
and that his name
is Fred Hooters.
83
00:03:43,196 --> 00:03:45,826
‐ See, this is the kind of
scorching‐hot gossip
84
00:03:45,826 --> 00:03:49,076
that I can't believe I only get
it, like, every few weeks now.
85
00:03:49,083 --> 00:03:50,963
‐ Yeah, but you're doing good,
though, right?
86
00:03:50,961 --> 00:03:54,011
‐ Um, it's definitely
different
87
00:03:54,009 --> 00:03:55,639
than I thought it would be.
88
00:03:55,638 --> 00:03:57,268
But I'm‐‐I'm good.
89
00:03:57,265 --> 00:03:59,015
I'm really good. I, uh...
90
00:03:59,019 --> 00:04:01,529
I just had an interview
at "The Bridgetown Tribune."
91
00:04:01,525 --> 00:04:03,645
‐ Oh.
‐ And it was great.
92
00:04:03,654 --> 00:04:06,414
It was great,
and I think it's gonna happen.
93
00:04:06,409 --> 00:04:07,699
‐ That's great.
94
00:04:07,704 --> 00:04:09,424
‐ Yeah,
but who cares about that?
95
00:04:09,415 --> 00:04:11,375
I want to hear
about the big promotion.
96
00:04:11,377 --> 00:04:13,127
‐ Ah, well,
it's mostly just taking care
97
00:04:13,131 --> 00:04:14,631
of people's dumb shit.
98
00:04:14,634 --> 00:04:16,854
Like, Andy came to my desk
four times today.
99
00:04:16,847 --> 00:04:18,977
He wanted to go home
'cause his tooth fell out.
100
00:04:18,976 --> 00:04:20,056
‐ What?
‐ Yeah.
101
00:04:20,061 --> 00:04:21,941
I let him go.
‐ Ugh.
102
00:04:21,940 --> 00:04:24,280
I miss everybody, like, a lot
more than I thought I would.
103
00:04:24,278 --> 00:04:26,578
‐ We miss you, too.
Oh, you know what?
104
00:04:26,575 --> 00:04:29,245
You should come
to Ruthie's birthday party.
105
00:04:29,246 --> 00:04:31,286
It's gonna be at
the Oaks Park skating rink.
106
00:04:31,292 --> 00:04:33,592
‐ Oh.
‐ Studio 54 theme.
107
00:04:33,589 --> 00:04:34,669
‐ Wow.
108
00:04:34,674 --> 00:04:36,394
"1970s dress code.
109
00:04:36,385 --> 00:04:39,095
Must have"...
BOTH: "Full bush."
110
00:04:39,099 --> 00:04:40,599
‐ Full bush.
‐ Wow. Wow.
111
00:04:40,603 --> 00:04:43,023
This is actually very much
my kind of party.
112
00:04:43,024 --> 00:04:44,694
‐ Yeah?
113
00:04:44,694 --> 00:04:46,534
You should come rub your
success in everyone's face.
114
00:04:46,531 --> 00:04:48,161
‐ [laughing] Oh.
Yeah, definitely.
115
00:04:48,159 --> 00:04:51,419
Oh, um, actually,
I'm gonna cover this,
116
00:04:51,415 --> 00:04:53,165
because we're
actually celebrating
117
00:04:53,169 --> 00:04:55,259
a very important promotion.
118
00:04:55,256 --> 00:04:57,756
So I have $3 here,
119
00:04:57,762 --> 00:05:00,772
and then I have this gift card,
and it does‐‐
120
00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:03,188
it says RadioShack, but it's
actually very good anywhere.
121
00:05:03,189 --> 00:05:04,649
You can use it.
‐ Oh, you know what?
122
00:05:04,651 --> 00:05:06,401
Actually, why don't you let me
get this?
123
00:05:06,403 --> 00:05:10,253
I can expense this
'cause I am the boss now.
124
00:05:10,245 --> 00:05:11,665
‐ Wow.
125
00:05:11,665 --> 00:05:14,625
That's extremely fancy
and really nice.
126
00:05:14,629 --> 00:05:16,089
‐ Yeah, you're welcome.
127
00:05:16,090 --> 00:05:19,220
‐ I'll, uh...
I can leave...
128
00:05:19,221 --> 00:05:21,311
the tip.
129
00:05:21,308 --> 00:05:22,518
‐ It's a origami duck.
130
00:05:22,520 --> 00:05:23,860
‐ [laughs]
‐ Nice.
131
00:05:23,856 --> 00:05:25,226
[women laughing]
132
00:05:25,233 --> 00:05:27,283
‐ Wait, you want us to believe
133
00:05:27,279 --> 00:05:29,319
that the woman who called me
a prude bitch
134
00:05:29,324 --> 00:05:31,754
for never being in an orgy
hasn't had sex in a month?
135
00:05:31,746 --> 00:05:34,206
‐ Not a soul,
not even a soulless being.
136
00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:35,589
I haven't even fucked a ghost.
137
00:05:35,588 --> 00:05:37,218
‐ Okay, and we're using "ghost"
138
00:05:37,215 --> 00:05:39,715
as, like, a code word
for masturbation, right?
139
00:05:39,721 --> 00:05:42,481
I'm just trying to understand
how dire the situation is.
140
00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:44,475
‐ Well, I haven't hooked up
with anyone in a month,
141
00:05:44,479 --> 00:05:46,779
and I'm masturbating
tastefully and sparingly.
142
00:05:46,776 --> 00:05:48,196
‐ Oof.
‐ Oh.
143
00:05:48,196 --> 00:05:50,066
‐ Okay, you're braiding
too tight.
144
00:05:50,074 --> 00:05:52,204
Please don't take your sexual
repression out on my scalp.
145
00:05:52,204 --> 00:05:53,924
‐ Okay, there's no repression.
146
00:05:53,916 --> 00:05:55,956
I've just been hooking up
with people since I was 15.
147
00:05:55,961 --> 00:05:57,971
It feels good to finally get
off the roller coaster.
148
00:05:57,965 --> 00:05:59,465
‐ I got off
on a roller coaster once.
149
00:05:59,468 --> 00:06:00,468
[door opens]
‐ Tacky.
150
00:06:00,470 --> 00:06:02,100
‐ I'm sorry.
I need help.
151
00:06:02,098 --> 00:06:03,688
I'm so nervous
about this party,
152
00:06:03,685 --> 00:06:06,265
and I've been jamming
on teen YouTube tutorials
153
00:06:06,273 --> 00:06:08,573
for about two hours now,
154
00:06:08,570 --> 00:06:11,080
and I'm concerned
that I'm starting to look
155
00:06:11,075 --> 00:06:12,655
like the queen of the raccoons.
156
00:06:12,662 --> 00:06:14,082
‐ Okay, just let me
do your hair
157
00:06:14,081 --> 00:06:15,751
and don't try to do it
yourself.
158
00:06:15,751 --> 00:06:18,261
‐ Oh, good. I'm gonna get me
some more damn wine.
159
00:06:18,256 --> 00:06:19,876
‐ Oh, me too, please.
160
00:06:19,884 --> 00:06:22,104
‐ I love when I get to be your
little gorgeous baby doll.
161
00:06:22,097 --> 00:06:23,637
‐ Oh, and don't call
yourself that.
162
00:06:23,642 --> 00:06:25,562
‐ Why?
[laughter]
163
00:06:25,562 --> 00:06:27,862
‐ Annie, what do you think of
Fran's record‐long dry spell?
164
00:06:27,858 --> 00:06:30,358
‐ No, wrong. It's only
a dry spell if you're thirsty.
165
00:06:30,363 --> 00:06:33,793
‐ I feel like it was very hard
with the Vic shit, you know?
166
00:06:33,787 --> 00:06:35,787
Like, if she wants to take
a break, she should do that.
167
00:06:35,791 --> 00:06:38,591
‐ Okay, yes, but I'm moving on
to the next stage of my life,
168
00:06:38,588 --> 00:06:40,468
which means no more
emotionally destroying
169
00:06:40,466 --> 00:06:42,096
all of the women
in the Pacific Northwest.
170
00:06:42,095 --> 00:06:43,515
[laughter]
171
00:06:43,515 --> 00:06:44,885
And, Annie, how do you feel
172
00:06:44,892 --> 00:06:46,442
about adding
about 4 pounds more hair?
173
00:06:46,437 --> 00:06:48,067
‐ Oh, yes,
I very much want to look
174
00:06:48,065 --> 00:06:49,315
like a horse in heat.
175
00:06:49,318 --> 00:06:51,318
‐ A gorgeous horse in heat.
‐ Ooh.
176
00:06:55,079 --> 00:06:56,749
[disco music playing]
‐ Oh, wow!
177
00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:59,000
RYAN: You didn't tell me
this was gonna be '70s themed.
178
00:06:59,004 --> 00:07:01,224
‐ Yeah, I mean, why are you
dressed like that?
179
00:07:01,216 --> 00:07:02,636
‐ 'Cause this is
the way I dress.
180
00:07:02,636 --> 00:07:04,716
‐ Hey!
What the fucking shit is this?
181
00:07:04,724 --> 00:07:07,024
‐ Oh, God.
Ruthie, I'm sorry.
182
00:07:07,020 --> 00:07:10,490
Amadi told me about your party,
so I thought it was okay.
183
00:07:10,485 --> 00:07:12,525
‐ I'm just‐‐
I'm just fucking with you.
184
00:07:12,531 --> 00:07:14,331
Scaring people makes me horny.
185
00:07:14,326 --> 00:07:15,616
[gasps] Wow, it's my birthday.
186
00:07:15,621 --> 00:07:17,711
Did you bring me a gift?
187
00:07:17,708 --> 00:07:20,508
‐ Oh, no, the invitation said
"no gifts."
188
00:07:20,506 --> 00:07:22,126
‐ Give me your earrings.
‐ Oh.
189
00:07:22,133 --> 00:07:24,643
Well, these are actually
my mom's from college.
190
00:07:24,639 --> 00:07:26,179
‐ [laughs]
"Mom's from college."
191
00:07:26,183 --> 00:07:29,313
A woman belongs in the home,
especially a mom.
192
00:07:29,314 --> 00:07:30,574
‐ Wow.
193
00:07:30,567 --> 00:07:32,947
‐ Are you okay?
‐ Yeah.
194
00:07:32,947 --> 00:07:35,327
Yeah, actually, that could have
been so much worse.
195
00:07:35,326 --> 00:07:37,036
But I think tonight
I'll be okay.
196
00:07:37,038 --> 00:07:39,708
[people shouting indistinctly]
‐ What's wrong with you?
197
00:07:39,710 --> 00:07:41,050
‐ Hey, chill. Chill.
198
00:07:41,046 --> 00:07:42,416
‐ A claw machine.
199
00:07:42,423 --> 00:07:43,643
Cool!
200
00:07:43,635 --> 00:07:45,805
‐ Yeah, those are
the distro guys.
201
00:07:45,806 --> 00:07:47,766
They actually deliver
the papers.
202
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:49,648
They're really nice.
203
00:07:49,647 --> 00:07:52,277
You should go claw with them
if you want.
204
00:07:52,277 --> 00:07:55,617
‐ Oh, no.
I'm‐‐I'm here for you tonight.
205
00:07:55,617 --> 00:07:56,907
‐ Aw.
206
00:07:56,911 --> 00:07:58,671
I‐I actually feel good.
207
00:07:58,665 --> 00:08:00,375
Honestly, like, I feel fine.
208
00:08:00,376 --> 00:08:03,586
And I see my buds. I'm good.
209
00:08:03,592 --> 00:08:05,392
Yeah, go. Go claw it up.
210
00:08:05,386 --> 00:08:07,426
‐ Okay.
All right.
211
00:08:07,432 --> 00:08:09,482
[people shouting indistinctly]
212
00:08:09,477 --> 00:08:11,477
‐ Whoa‐ho!
[Ryan laughs]
213
00:08:11,481 --> 00:08:13,111
PLAYER: Come on! RYAN: Damn.
214
00:08:13,110 --> 00:08:14,610
[groovy music]
215
00:08:14,614 --> 00:08:17,914
SINGER:
♪ I wanna tell you today ♪
216
00:08:17,912 --> 00:08:21,502
♪ I wanna tell you today ♪
217
00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:22,802
‐ Hey, Annie.
218
00:08:22,796 --> 00:08:23,916
‐ There she is.
ANNIE: Oh, hi!
219
00:08:23,924 --> 00:08:25,184
‐ Annie!
220
00:08:25,176 --> 00:08:26,596
Okay, I have to ask you
a favor.
221
00:08:26,596 --> 00:08:28,096
Can you please
guard the ladies' room
222
00:08:28,098 --> 00:08:30,188
so I can have sex
with my husband, the boss,
223
00:08:30,186 --> 00:08:31,936
in one of the stalls?
224
00:08:31,940 --> 00:08:34,240
‐ Uh, sorry, what is happening?
225
00:08:34,236 --> 00:08:36,986
‐ Cindy's very into me
since the promotion, sex‐wise.
226
00:08:36,991 --> 00:08:39,001
I tried to tell her I don't
even have a wall in my office.
227
00:08:38,995 --> 00:08:40,325
It's just, like,
a stack of books.
228
00:08:40,331 --> 00:08:41,921
‐ Okay, whatever.
229
00:08:41,918 --> 00:08:44,548
You're making more money,
and now I can get an SUV.
230
00:08:44,548 --> 00:08:49,308
Ooh, Annie, speaking of new
big things, "The Tribune"?
231
00:08:49,307 --> 00:08:51,517
‐ Oh, yeah.
Yeah, "The Tribune."
232
00:08:51,521 --> 00:08:52,981
It's‐‐it's gonna be great.
233
00:08:52,982 --> 00:08:54,862
‐ Well, Amadi was worried
234
00:08:54,860 --> 00:08:56,950
that it was gonna be rough
for you after you left,
235
00:08:56,948 --> 00:08:59,538
and I just said,
"Shut up, loser.
236
00:08:59,537 --> 00:09:03,247
This is Annie, and she
is gonna make it happen."
237
00:09:03,252 --> 00:09:05,512
‐ Oh, yeah.
I'm gonna make it happen.
238
00:09:05,507 --> 00:09:07,507
And I'm feeling good.
239
00:09:07,511 --> 00:09:09,261
And I'm gonna have
a fucking great night.
240
00:09:09,264 --> 00:09:11,144
[laughs]
‐ Yes!
241
00:09:11,143 --> 00:09:15,363
And you and Amadi are gonna
fucking run this stupid city.
242
00:09:15,359 --> 00:09:16,489
‐ [laughs]
‐ Okay.
243
00:09:16,486 --> 00:09:17,696
ANNIE: Wow, whoo!
244
00:09:17,698 --> 00:09:18,868
[laughing]
245
00:09:18,867 --> 00:09:20,577
SINGER: ♪ Love ♪
246
00:09:20,579 --> 00:09:23,539
♪ Love will keep us together ♪
247
00:09:23,543 --> 00:09:25,053
‐ Oh.
248
00:09:25,046 --> 00:09:26,756
MATTEO: You're like
the male Cruella de Vil.
249
00:09:26,758 --> 00:09:28,298
‐ Okay.
250
00:09:28,302 --> 00:09:31,982
‐ But don't be mad,
because your outfit...
251
00:09:31,976 --> 00:09:33,516
incroyable!
252
00:09:33,521 --> 00:09:35,071
‐ Well, thank you.
I appreciate that.
253
00:09:35,066 --> 00:09:37,026
These are actually
my own clothes.
254
00:09:37,028 --> 00:09:38,868
‐ Did you wear it to party
at Club 54?
255
00:09:38,865 --> 00:09:41,195
‐ It's called Studio 54.
256
00:09:41,203 --> 00:09:43,293
What did you think,
I was ten years old
257
00:09:43,290 --> 00:09:46,090
going from Little League
to doing lines with Halston?
258
00:09:46,088 --> 00:09:47,928
‐ Who's that?
GABE: [laughs]
259
00:09:47,925 --> 00:09:49,295
Plus, your clothes
are all wrong.
260
00:09:49,302 --> 00:09:50,892
They're all
from the fuckin' '90s.
261
00:09:50,889 --> 00:09:52,979
Rollerblades didn't exist
in the '70s.
262
00:09:52,976 --> 00:09:55,566
‐ Well, neither did we,
263
00:09:55,565 --> 00:09:57,525
but, um, I don't know,
we just thought
264
00:09:57,528 --> 00:09:59,198
it was, like, old and vintage.
265
00:09:59,197 --> 00:10:00,577
‐ Like you.
266
00:10:00,575 --> 00:10:02,575
‐ Um, what the fuck
is this music?
267
00:10:02,579 --> 00:10:04,209
Is this, like,
a joke song or something?
268
00:10:04,207 --> 00:10:07,167
‐ It's Captain & Tennille,
you pieces of shit.
269
00:10:07,171 --> 00:10:10,391
‐ [laughs]
270
00:10:10,386 --> 00:10:12,386
[both laugh]
271
00:10:12,390 --> 00:10:15,440
‐ I‐I got you a White Russian.
272
00:10:15,438 --> 00:10:17,478
‐ Oh, Maureen, thank you.
273
00:10:17,483 --> 00:10:19,243
[chuckles] Wow.
274
00:10:19,237 --> 00:10:23,037
‐ Well, I actually kissed
a white Russian man in 2007.
275
00:10:23,036 --> 00:10:24,826
I‐I mean I assume
he was Russian
276
00:10:24,832 --> 00:10:26,212
'cause he didn't say a word.
277
00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:27,589
‐ Wow.
‐ It's‐‐yeah.
278
00:10:27,588 --> 00:10:29,878
‐ That's cool.
You know, I might‐‐
279
00:10:29,884 --> 00:10:32,104
‐ So, you know, it's so fun,
280
00:10:32,096 --> 00:10:35,516
just two gal pals in the city
talking sex.
281
00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:37,190
‐ Mm!
282
00:10:37,190 --> 00:10:38,740
‐ Yeah.
‐ But, you know...
283
00:10:38,735 --> 00:10:41,445
Uh, you're my hero for quitting
like you did.
284
00:10:41,448 --> 00:10:43,328
No one stands up
to Gabe like that,
285
00:10:43,327 --> 00:10:45,037
and it meant a lot
to a bunch of us.
286
00:10:45,039 --> 00:10:47,749
‐ Oh, um, well, thank you.
287
00:10:47,753 --> 00:10:49,013
Thanks for saying that.
288
00:10:49,005 --> 00:10:51,005
That‐‐that means a lot.
289
00:10:51,009 --> 00:10:52,719
‐ So what's been going on?
290
00:10:52,721 --> 00:10:55,061
‐ Uh...
291
00:10:55,059 --> 00:10:57,649
I got a job at "The Tribune."
292
00:10:57,648 --> 00:11:00,608
Uh, I'm gonna cover
local politics...
293
00:11:00,612 --> 00:11:02,742
I think, so...
294
00:11:02,741 --> 00:11:04,791
‐ I knew you'd do
something amazing.
295
00:11:04,787 --> 00:11:06,577
‐ Yeah.
296
00:11:06,582 --> 00:11:08,712
‐ Hey, hey, did I ever tell you
about the time my brother
297
00:11:08,711 --> 00:11:10,631
tried to wear a top hat
to high school?
298
00:11:10,632 --> 00:11:12,892
It's long but worth it.
299
00:11:12,886 --> 00:11:15,846
‐ Oh, I‐I want to hear that,
but I just‐‐
300
00:11:15,851 --> 00:11:18,231
I finished my drink,
so I might get a freshie.
301
00:11:18,230 --> 00:11:19,980
You know?
‐ Okay, cool.
302
00:11:19,984 --> 00:11:23,164
You know, it was actually not
my brother‐‐it was me.
303
00:11:23,156 --> 00:11:26,496
My brother wore a cowboy hat.
He looked hot.
304
00:11:26,496 --> 00:11:27,876
♪ ♪
305
00:11:27,875 --> 00:11:29,745
REGGIE:
Come on, I believe in you.
306
00:11:29,753 --> 00:11:31,593
I'll knock you and throw
you down the fucking stairs
307
00:11:31,591 --> 00:11:33,891
like my fuckin' dad did‐‐
let's go!
308
00:11:33,887 --> 00:11:35,967
BEAU: You got this. You're
a modern‐day Jesus Christ.
309
00:11:35,974 --> 00:11:37,524
Now just bring us home.
310
00:11:37,519 --> 00:11:38,979
‐ Oh, there's a Casio watch
right there!
311
00:11:38,980 --> 00:11:41,030
‐ Where? What?
312
00:11:41,026 --> 00:11:42,736
‐ Right by
the stuffed cell phone
and the big‐eyed baby cat.
313
00:11:42,738 --> 00:11:44,828
There's a fucking Casio watch!
‐ It's too stacked.
314
00:11:44,825 --> 00:11:46,325
I don't think
I can get in there.
315
00:11:46,328 --> 00:11:47,618
‐ Stop thinking that way!
316
00:11:47,623 --> 00:11:48,833
Stop with the stinking thinking
317
00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:50,253
and start
with the money thinking.
318
00:11:50,252 --> 00:11:51,252
PLAYER: Come on!
‐ All right?
319
00:11:51,254 --> 00:11:53,134
Now go! Go!
320
00:11:53,133 --> 00:11:54,513
We love you!
PLAYER: We love you!
321
00:11:54,511 --> 00:11:55,601
PLAYER 2: You're awesome!
322
00:11:55,597 --> 00:11:57,767
[all groan] It's okay.
323
00:11:57,768 --> 00:11:59,398
It's okay. It's okay.
324
00:11:59,395 --> 00:12:00,855
‐ I suck!
‐ Hey!
325
00:12:00,857 --> 00:12:04,107
You are not a loser!
‐ Do not!
326
00:12:04,113 --> 00:12:06,333
‐ But you are acting like one!
‐ Yes!
327
00:12:06,326 --> 00:12:08,536
Get your ass
back in the game, dude.
328
00:12:08,539 --> 00:12:10,959
SINGER: ♪ Hold on ♪
329
00:12:10,961 --> 00:12:13,131
♪ Babe, you got to hold on ♪
330
00:12:13,131 --> 00:12:16,561
‐ So Andy's going
by DJ Pussyhound now?
331
00:12:16,555 --> 00:12:18,425
That guy's
a nasty little freak.
332
00:12:18,433 --> 00:12:21,023
RUTHIE: Everybody, listen up.
This is an emergency.
333
00:12:21,022 --> 00:12:23,152
[music stops]
334
00:12:23,151 --> 00:12:27,241
There is an active shooter
in the skating rink right now.
335
00:12:27,243 --> 00:12:31,383
[chuckles]
That active shooter is me...
336
00:12:31,376 --> 00:12:34,676
because I'm about to blow
your fucking minds off.
337
00:12:34,675 --> 00:12:37,135
[cheers and applause]
338
00:12:37,138 --> 00:12:40,518
Thank you all so much
for being here.
339
00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:43,400
I know that I may be turning 24
340
00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:45,860
and I may look 16,
341
00:12:45,864 --> 00:12:47,784
but my wish
342
00:12:47,784 --> 00:12:51,174
is to be as wise and amazing
343
00:12:51,166 --> 00:12:53,666
as the oldest person I know,
344
00:12:53,671 --> 00:12:56,181
my gay grandpa, Gabe.
345
00:12:56,176 --> 00:12:57,716
‐ [laughs]
Fuck you, honey.
346
00:12:57,721 --> 00:12:59,431
RUTHIE: Kill yourself.
347
00:12:59,432 --> 00:13:02,232
DJ, play my backing track?
348
00:13:02,229 --> 00:13:03,979
[electronic music playing]
349
00:13:03,983 --> 00:13:06,403
♪ The day I was born,
my mother felt a pain ♪
350
00:13:06,404 --> 00:13:08,834
♪ Like the Devil
was trying to run a train ♪
351
00:13:08,826 --> 00:13:10,706
♪ On her genitalianus ♪
352
00:13:10,705 --> 00:13:12,245
‐ Oh.
353
00:13:12,249 --> 00:13:13,999
‐ ♪ I tore my mom
from end to end to end ♪
354
00:13:14,003 --> 00:13:16,173
♪ I tore my mom
from receive to send ♪
355
00:13:16,174 --> 00:13:18,304
♪ I tore my mom
from end to end to end ♪
356
00:13:18,303 --> 00:13:19,393
[cake splats] MAUREEN: Shit.
357
00:13:19,388 --> 00:13:21,598
[crowd gasps]
358
00:13:21,602 --> 00:13:26,242
[voice breaking]
My perfect moment is ruined.
359
00:13:26,236 --> 00:13:27,906
[mic thuds, whines]
360
00:13:27,906 --> 00:13:30,076
MAUREEN: I'm‐‐I'm sorry.
361
00:13:31,622 --> 00:13:35,712
[Lipps Inc.'s "Funkytown"
playing]
362
00:13:35,713 --> 00:13:38,303
‐ So what‐‐what are you up to?
363
00:13:38,301 --> 00:13:41,221
‐ Uh...
I'm great, Angus.
364
00:13:41,224 --> 00:13:43,944
‐ Cool, but, like, what‐‐
what are you doing now?
365
00:13:43,938 --> 00:13:45,648
‐ Fuck, man, I'm fucking good.
366
00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:49,410
Tell everybody
I'm fucking great, man.
367
00:13:49,407 --> 00:13:51,867
Fuck!
368
00:13:51,871 --> 00:13:54,381
Fuck.
369
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:56,085
RUTHIE: Hey, really enjoy that.
370
00:13:56,087 --> 00:13:58,797
That's the last bag my dealer
sold me before she died.
371
00:13:58,801 --> 00:14:00,301
‐ Oh.
372
00:14:00,304 --> 00:14:02,734
‐ [hisses] Fuck.
RUTHIE: Oh.
373
00:14:02,726 --> 00:14:04,856
‐ Fuck this whole night.
‐ Oh, hey, Gabe.
374
00:14:04,855 --> 00:14:06,355
Do you want us
to clear out of here
375
00:14:06,357 --> 00:14:08,317
so you can take
your trademark tiny shit?
376
00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:09,990
‐ Very funny.
377
00:14:09,990 --> 00:14:12,370
Oh, Jesus, I love drugs.
‐ Oh, pee‐pee.
378
00:14:12,369 --> 00:14:14,879
Oh, Gabe.
FRIEND: Hey, be careful, dude.
379
00:14:14,875 --> 00:14:16,665
FRIEND 2: Whoa.
FRIEND: Dude, that's ketamine.
380
00:14:16,670 --> 00:14:18,340
GABE: Mm‐hmm. RUTHIE: Uh, yeah.
381
00:14:18,340 --> 00:14:20,140
Think about how much coke
you would normally do
382
00:14:20,135 --> 00:14:21,385
and do, like, a tenth of that.
383
00:14:21,387 --> 00:14:24,847
‐ Please, honey.
I invented drugs.
384
00:14:24,853 --> 00:14:26,403
Here we go. [sniffs]
385
00:14:26,397 --> 00:14:27,437
[coughs]
386
00:14:27,441 --> 00:14:28,651
Oh. [coughs]
387
00:14:28,653 --> 00:14:30,113
RUTHIE: Oh, my God.
388
00:14:30,113 --> 00:14:33,293
Um, you are about to go
into a K hole.
389
00:14:33,286 --> 00:14:34,746
‐ What's that?
390
00:14:34,748 --> 00:14:36,378
‐ [sighs]
391
00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:39,676
‐ A K hole is the darkest place
in the world,
392
00:14:39,675 --> 00:14:41,135
where you're fully paralyzed
393
00:14:41,135 --> 00:14:43,595
because you've done
too much ketamine.
394
00:14:43,599 --> 00:14:46,059
‐ No, the '80s was
the darkest place in the world.
395
00:14:46,062 --> 00:14:47,362
This I can handle.
396
00:14:49,653 --> 00:14:51,663
PLAYER: Take the dog
away from the Casio.
397
00:14:51,657 --> 00:14:52,697
‐ Ryan.
398
00:14:52,701 --> 00:14:53,831
‐ Yeah.
‐ Come on.
399
00:14:53,828 --> 00:14:54,908
‐ Ryan.
‐ Shake it up.
400
00:14:54,913 --> 00:14:56,883
‐ [gasps]
‐ Oh, Annie!
401
00:14:56,875 --> 00:14:58,875
‐ Annie sauce!
‐ Ha ha ha.
402
00:14:58,879 --> 00:15:00,879
You did not tell us
that you were with Annie.
403
00:15:00,883 --> 00:15:02,513
‐ Yeah.
404
00:15:02,512 --> 00:15:04,812
‐ What the hell?
I thought that you liked us?
405
00:15:04,808 --> 00:15:06,308
‐ Both of you?
406
00:15:06,310 --> 00:15:08,820
‐ Yeah.
‐ Yeah.
407
00:15:08,816 --> 00:15:10,896
‐ I like you as friends, but...
Come on.
408
00:15:10,903 --> 00:15:12,283
Please?
409
00:15:12,281 --> 00:15:14,201
Maybe just the two of us
can talk?
410
00:15:14,201 --> 00:15:15,451
‐ Yeah.
411
00:15:15,454 --> 00:15:17,334
Oh, and I got you this.
412
00:15:17,332 --> 00:15:19,132
‐ Oh.
‐ So if you need to talk to me
413
00:15:19,128 --> 00:15:21,088
at any point,
just give me a ring.
414
00:15:21,090 --> 00:15:22,130
‐ Okay.
415
00:15:22,134 --> 00:15:23,724
Okay, I just, um...
416
00:15:23,721 --> 00:15:26,271
I'm kind of freaking the fuck
out right now.
417
00:15:26,267 --> 00:15:29,017
I told everyone, like,
"Oh, I'm great," or whatever,
418
00:15:29,023 --> 00:15:31,743
but that's fucking fake,
you know?
419
00:15:31,737 --> 00:15:35,077
And my hair is so heavy
because it's fake,
420
00:15:35,077 --> 00:15:37,327
and I‐I drank a lot.
421
00:15:37,331 --> 00:15:39,251
Like, I drank a lot of liquids.
422
00:15:39,251 --> 00:15:42,841
Different liquids all mixed up,
and I'm just‐‐
423
00:15:42,842 --> 00:15:45,182
Like, do I seem okay?
424
00:15:45,180 --> 00:15:46,680
Be honest, please.
425
00:15:46,683 --> 00:15:49,363
Like, does the feelings
in my brain‐‐
426
00:15:49,355 --> 00:15:52,775
are they starting to also
come out to the outside of me?
427
00:15:52,779 --> 00:15:54,779
‐ You're fine.
428
00:15:54,783 --> 00:15:56,413
You're great.
429
00:15:56,410 --> 00:15:57,870
‐ Are you sure?
430
00:15:57,872 --> 00:16:00,002
‐ I promise.
431
00:16:00,001 --> 00:16:02,171
SINGER:
♪ Even when you can't see it ♪
432
00:16:02,172 --> 00:16:04,142
♪ You try to believe ♪
433
00:16:04,135 --> 00:16:06,305
‐ Yeah.
I feel great.
434
00:16:06,305 --> 00:16:08,475
I feel actually
really fucking great.
435
00:16:08,476 --> 00:16:10,566
Thanks.
436
00:16:10,565 --> 00:16:13,145
I feel fucking great.
437
00:16:13,153 --> 00:16:15,703
It's dog shit out there,
Andrew.
438
00:16:15,700 --> 00:16:18,580
Really fucking bad, okay?
439
00:16:18,581 --> 00:16:21,291
And I don't have anything
to show for it.
440
00:16:21,294 --> 00:16:25,394
I'm sad, I'm mad, nobody
in the world will hire me.
441
00:16:25,385 --> 00:16:28,135
Everyone's real fucking good
on their wheel shoes
442
00:16:28,141 --> 00:16:31,271
showing off making me
look like a dumbass.
443
00:16:31,272 --> 00:16:33,482
Hello, 911?
444
00:16:33,484 --> 00:16:35,494
Yes, could you please kill me
445
00:16:35,488 --> 00:16:38,828
and then bury my body
in the fucking dump?
446
00:16:38,829 --> 00:16:40,169
Sucks.
447
00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:41,495
‐ Dr. Martin Luther King
once said‐‐
448
00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:42,880
‐ Oh, my God. Shut up.
449
00:16:42,879 --> 00:16:44,469
I don't need to talk
to you anymore,
450
00:16:44,465 --> 00:16:46,175
'cause there's
my real fucking friend.
451
00:16:46,177 --> 00:16:47,467
Amadi?
452
00:16:47,471 --> 00:16:49,181
Amadi. AMADI: Annie.
453
00:16:49,183 --> 00:16:51,483
‐ Can I have a real honesty
talk with you, please?
454
00:16:51,479 --> 00:16:54,399
‐ Yeah, okay, I get it‐‐she's
drunk, and she's getting real.
455
00:16:54,401 --> 00:16:55,741
‐ Yeah. Yeah.
‐ [laughs]
456
00:16:55,738 --> 00:16:58,198
‐ [crying] I lied so much.
457
00:16:58,201 --> 00:17:00,041
I miss working at "The Thorn."
458
00:17:00,038 --> 00:17:01,998
I miss you guys. I miss money.
459
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:06,430
And I know Gabe is a dick, but
I should have never quit.
460
00:17:06,425 --> 00:17:08,215
And I have to
tell you the truth.
461
00:17:08,221 --> 00:17:11,521
There is‐‐
there's no job at "The Trib."
462
00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:13,270
‐ Oh.
463
00:17:13,273 --> 00:17:16,913
‐ So now I'm just a big fucking
dumb liar who sucks.
464
00:17:16,905 --> 00:17:18,735
‐ Hey, everyone's
full of shit, okay?
465
00:17:18,742 --> 00:17:20,452
It doesn't matter.
466
00:17:20,453 --> 00:17:22,423
And if you want your job back,
just go ask for it.
467
00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:23,996
Gabe didn't fire you, you quit.
468
00:17:24,003 --> 00:17:26,883
‐ Yeah, but I fucked
everything up with Gabe,
469
00:17:26,883 --> 00:17:28,973
and now he hates me,
and he won't even look at me.
470
00:17:28,971 --> 00:17:31,641
‐ No, he doesn't. I've been
working with him a lot, okay?
471
00:17:31,643 --> 00:17:33,483
When you quit, it spun him out.
472
00:17:33,479 --> 00:17:35,069
‐ Really?
‐ Yeah.
473
00:17:35,066 --> 00:17:37,316
He feels like
an old close‐minded jerk.
474
00:17:37,321 --> 00:17:39,121
And he might not admit it,
475
00:17:39,116 --> 00:17:41,446
but he wants a redo
just as bad as you do.
476
00:17:41,454 --> 00:17:43,924
‐ You really think so?
‐ Yeah.
477
00:17:43,917 --> 00:17:46,257
Now, go eat some shit
and go get your job back.
478
00:17:46,255 --> 00:17:48,755
I saw Gabe a minute ago
over by the lockers.
479
00:17:48,761 --> 00:17:51,681
‐ Okay, you are such a angel
to me.
480
00:17:51,683 --> 00:17:53,103
Such a true angel.
481
00:17:53,102 --> 00:17:55,022
And you actually have a call.
‐ All right.
482
00:17:55,023 --> 00:17:56,573
‐ It's from God.
‐ Okay. It's God?
483
00:17:56,568 --> 00:17:58,318
‐ And He wants to thank you
for your service.
484
00:17:58,321 --> 00:17:59,871
‐ Okay.
God, what's up, man?
485
00:18:03,331 --> 00:18:06,301
[psychedelic rock music]
486
00:18:06,295 --> 00:18:08,795
‐ [sighs]
Gabe?
487
00:18:10,345 --> 00:18:12,095
Are we allowed in here?
488
00:18:15,146 --> 00:18:16,976
Um...
489
00:18:16,983 --> 00:18:21,083
I'm just‐‐
I'm just gonna say it.
490
00:18:21,075 --> 00:18:24,285
I want my job back,
and I'm sorry.
491
00:18:24,289 --> 00:18:26,999
And I also should confess.
492
00:18:27,003 --> 00:18:29,513
Currently I am drunk.
493
00:18:29,509 --> 00:18:34,309
But I do still mean
all the words.
494
00:18:34,309 --> 00:18:37,019
And‐‐and‐‐
495
00:18:37,023 --> 00:18:38,743
and if you have me back,
496
00:18:38,736 --> 00:18:41,316
you can give me all
the shit assignments you want.
497
00:18:41,323 --> 00:18:44,663
Anything you want,
and I will say thank you,
498
00:18:44,664 --> 00:18:46,544
and I'll do it with a smile.
499
00:18:46,543 --> 00:18:51,513
I just really, really, really
want people with real eyes
500
00:18:51,511 --> 00:18:54,641
to read my work again
and not just penis bots.
501
00:18:54,642 --> 00:18:58,362
♪ ♪
502
00:18:58,357 --> 00:19:01,107
Please.
‐ Okay, I like "please."
503
00:19:01,113 --> 00:19:02,493
"Please" I like.
504
00:19:02,491 --> 00:19:05,621
I like a long ple‐e‐ase.
505
00:19:05,623 --> 00:19:07,383
‐ I should have never quit.
506
00:19:07,375 --> 00:19:09,205
I should have come to talk
to you,
507
00:19:09,213 --> 00:19:12,433
and I always thought
you were the coolest,
508
00:19:12,427 --> 00:19:16,267
the most authentic,
smart, cool‐‐
509
00:19:16,268 --> 00:19:18,688
‐ I‐I am.
510
00:19:18,690 --> 00:19:20,780
‐ Yes.
511
00:19:20,778 --> 00:19:22,158
You‐‐you totally are.
512
00:19:22,155 --> 00:19:25,155
‐ If I was
to take you back, Annie,
513
00:19:25,161 --> 00:19:29,341
you would have to experience
my res‐‐
514
00:19:29,336 --> 00:19:32,966
you'd have to respect
my experience,
515
00:19:32,969 --> 00:19:37,019
because I have been doing this
for 20 years.
516
00:19:37,018 --> 00:19:41,068
And you have been doing this
for 20 minutes.
517
00:19:41,068 --> 00:19:43,988
‐ Yes, and maybe
you could be open
518
00:19:43,991 --> 00:19:47,161
to the idea that I am talented
519
00:19:47,163 --> 00:19:49,923
and I deserve respect as well.
520
00:19:49,919 --> 00:19:51,799
♪ ♪
521
00:19:51,798 --> 00:19:54,298
Or‐‐or‐‐or not.
522
00:19:54,303 --> 00:19:56,183
It's not a deal breaker.
523
00:19:56,181 --> 00:19:59,481
I'll come back either that way
or the other way, with no‐‐
524
00:19:59,479 --> 00:20:03,609
‐ Annie, you need to learn
what the rules are before you‐‐
525
00:20:03,614 --> 00:20:05,334
before you just break 'em.
526
00:20:05,325 --> 00:20:07,155
‐ That is‐‐that is so smart.
527
00:20:07,162 --> 00:20:09,212
‐ I want to be your mentor.
528
00:20:09,207 --> 00:20:11,127
But you won't let me.
529
00:20:12,965 --> 00:20:16,675
‐ Yeah, but does that mean
I can come back?
530
00:20:16,681 --> 00:20:18,481
‐ Yeah!
531
00:20:18,476 --> 00:20:20,186
‐ Oh, wow, yes.
532
00:20:20,188 --> 00:20:22,568
Thank you. Thank you so much.
533
00:20:22,568 --> 00:20:24,568
I was so scared
you were gonna say no,
534
00:20:24,572 --> 00:20:26,622
and I'm so happy.
535
00:20:26,618 --> 00:20:28,198
I‐I promise you,
536
00:20:28,204 --> 00:20:31,714
I can really appreciate
what "The Thorn" is now.
537
00:20:31,711 --> 00:20:34,221
♪ ♪
538
00:20:34,216 --> 00:20:36,046
Gabe?
539
00:20:36,053 --> 00:20:37,853
Gabe?
540
00:20:37,848 --> 00:20:39,728
[Gabe muttering indistinctly]
541
00:20:39,727 --> 00:20:41,647
Gabe?
542
00:20:41,648 --> 00:20:43,228
‐ K hole.
543
00:20:44,862 --> 00:20:48,542
[Gabe muttering]
Why won't...anybody help me?
544
00:20:48,537 --> 00:20:50,077
‐ What?
545
00:20:50,081 --> 00:20:52,251
‐ [muttering]
Get me out of my body.
546
00:20:52,252 --> 00:20:54,052
‐ Help you
get out of your body?
547
00:20:57,638 --> 00:20:58,768
‐ I want
that fucking thing, man!
548
00:20:58,765 --> 00:21:00,935
Come on!
Machines have taken over!
549
00:21:00,936 --> 00:21:03,436
They atomized the Midwest!
The opioid epidemic
is happening!
550
00:21:03,441 --> 00:21:05,701
All right, give me
this fucking thing!
551
00:21:05,696 --> 00:21:07,616
‐ I believe in you!
552
00:21:07,616 --> 00:21:09,656
‐ Machines will not control me!
553
00:21:09,662 --> 00:21:11,332
[people roar]
554
00:21:11,331 --> 00:21:13,551
Get it!
Get the fuckin' thing! Get it!
555
00:21:13,545 --> 00:21:15,045
‐ Oh, my God.
‐ Give me the watch!
556
00:21:15,048 --> 00:21:17,298
‐ Right there.
‐ Yeah!
557
00:21:17,302 --> 00:21:20,272
[all cheering] Yes! We did it!
558
00:21:20,266 --> 00:21:22,096
‐ Fuck society!
559
00:21:22,103 --> 00:21:23,733
‐ That's right!
[all screaming]
560
00:21:23,732 --> 00:21:25,032
I did this for you guys!
561
00:21:25,026 --> 00:21:26,696
I'm the one that‐‐
‐ Ryan!
562
00:21:27,698 --> 00:21:29,988
‐ Oh, shit.
563
00:21:29,994 --> 00:21:31,334
‐ Ryan!
564
00:21:31,330 --> 00:21:33,000
I love you!
565
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,670
You're one of us now!
566
00:21:34,670 --> 00:21:36,670
‐ I love you guys!
BEAU: I love you, too.
567
00:21:36,674 --> 00:21:37,974
‐ My hair.
‐ No.
568
00:21:37,968 --> 00:21:40,388
No. Okay, see?
569
00:21:40,389 --> 00:21:44,109
Gabe, we're gonna get you home
nice and safe, okay?
570
00:21:44,106 --> 00:21:46,986
And, yes,
Monday you're my boss,
571
00:21:46,986 --> 00:21:49,196
but tonight you're my baby.
572
00:21:49,199 --> 00:21:51,749
You know,
and babies get kissed.
573
00:21:51,746 --> 00:21:53,826
See that? Oh!
574
00:21:53,834 --> 00:21:56,134
Here's a car that I called
for you, okay?
575
00:21:56,130 --> 00:21:58,720
Hi. Tyler?
576
00:21:58,718 --> 00:22:01,518
Okay, you actually‐‐
This is Gabe.
577
00:22:01,516 --> 00:22:04,146
And you're gonna have a baby
on board here, okay?
578
00:22:04,146 --> 00:22:07,946
So you need to get him home,
okeydokey?
579
00:22:07,945 --> 00:22:09,105
‐ [grunts]
580
00:22:09,114 --> 00:22:10,834
‐ Thank you, sir.
581
00:22:10,826 --> 00:22:13,536
Um, okay, Gabe?
582
00:22:13,540 --> 00:22:15,960
I'm gonna see you on Monday.
583
00:22:15,961 --> 00:22:17,921
I love you.
584
00:22:17,923 --> 00:22:19,723
Bye!
585
00:22:19,719 --> 00:22:23,229
Oh, this is the best night
of my life!
586
00:22:23,225 --> 00:22:25,645
[retches, gasps]
587
00:22:25,647 --> 00:22:27,227
I'm sorry.
588
00:22:27,233 --> 00:22:30,533
[retches, coughs]
589
00:22:30,532 --> 00:22:31,912
I'm so disgusting.
590
00:22:31,910 --> 00:22:34,620
Just, please, don't look at me.
591
00:22:34,624 --> 00:22:35,674
‐ It's okay.
592
00:22:35,667 --> 00:22:37,547
It's totally okay.
593
00:22:37,546 --> 00:22:38,716
Oh, shit.
594
00:22:38,715 --> 00:22:40,375
I just broke your hair.
595
00:22:40,384 --> 00:22:42,894
‐ [crying] It's fucking fake.
It's all fucking fake.
596
00:22:42,890 --> 00:22:46,190
I'm so sorry you have
to see me like this.
597
00:22:46,188 --> 00:22:47,978
[sobs]
‐ I want to help.
598
00:22:47,983 --> 00:22:52,373
‐ No, but you already helped me
so much tonight.
599
00:22:52,367 --> 00:22:55,327
Thank you for coming with me,
'cause I was so scared.
600
00:22:55,331 --> 00:22:57,341
I was so embarrassed,
601
00:22:57,335 --> 00:23:00,675
and now you're pushing my puke
down the drain.
602
00:23:00,676 --> 00:23:02,006
‐ I want to help.
603
00:23:02,011 --> 00:23:04,181
‐ I'm so disgusting.
I'm sorry.
604
00:23:04,182 --> 00:23:05,602
[sobs]
605
00:23:05,602 --> 00:23:08,362
[sighs]
606
00:23:08,357 --> 00:23:10,187
‐ Don't say that.
607
00:23:10,194 --> 00:23:11,994
Don't say you're gross
and disgusting.
608
00:23:11,990 --> 00:23:12,990
I don't care.
609
00:23:12,992 --> 00:23:15,372
I'm sometimes gross.
610
00:23:15,371 --> 00:23:17,381
We're allowed to be gross
with each other.
611
00:23:17,375 --> 00:23:21,875
I'll be gross
with you always, Annie.
612
00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:27,690
I love you.
613
00:23:27,688 --> 00:23:29,478
‐ What?
614
00:23:29,482 --> 00:23:32,822
‐ Yeah.
I love you.
615
00:23:32,823 --> 00:23:34,583
I've known for a while now.
616
00:23:34,577 --> 00:23:36,617
[Jenny Lewis' "Do Si Do"]
617
00:23:36,622 --> 00:23:38,462
‐ I love you. too.
618
00:23:38,459 --> 00:23:42,589
JENNY LEWIS:
♪ Get back on your Paxil ♪
619
00:23:42,593 --> 00:23:45,773
♪ Do‐si‐do ♪
620
00:23:45,766 --> 00:23:49,226
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
621
00:23:49,230 --> 00:23:52,530
♪ You're a pro ♪
622
00:23:52,529 --> 00:23:55,739
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
623
00:23:55,744 --> 00:23:58,124
♪ Do‐si‐do ♪
624
00:23:58,123 --> 00:24:00,463
♪ ♪
625
00:24:00,461 --> 00:24:05,641
♪ Make the grown man cry ♪
626
00:24:05,639 --> 00:24:08,439
♪ It's suicide ♪
627
00:24:08,435 --> 00:24:12,275
♪ My, oh, my ♪
628
00:24:12,276 --> 00:24:18,666
♪ Powerful minds ♪
629
00:24:18,665 --> 00:24:21,625
♪ And suicide ♪
630
00:24:21,629 --> 00:24:23,929
♪ My, oh, my ♪
631
00:24:23,925 --> 00:24:25,335
♪ ♪
632
00:24:25,344 --> 00:24:31,904
♪ Powerful minds ♪
633
00:24:31,899 --> 00:24:34,659
♪ And suicide ♪
634
00:24:34,655 --> 00:24:37,535
♪ My, oh, my ♪
635
00:24:37,536 --> 00:24:41,666
♪ ♪
636
00:24:41,669 --> 00:24:45,509
♪ Do‐si‐do ♪
637
00:24:45,510 --> 00:24:48,520
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
638
00:24:48,516 --> 00:24:51,516
♪ Rock and roll ♪
639
00:24:51,522 --> 00:24:54,532
♪ ♪
45738
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