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1
00:00:02,489 --> 00:00:06,164
- [ Rings]
- Hello?
2
00:01:08,622 --> 00:01:11,432
[Typing]
3
00:01:11,491 --> 00:01:14,404
I know, Don.
I didn't sleep a wink either.
4
00:01:14,461 --> 00:01:17,408
Seems like an eternity, doesn't it?
5
00:01:17,464 --> 00:01:19,410
What?
6
00:01:19,466 --> 00:01:21,844
An eon?
7
00:01:21,902 --> 00:01:25,008
Oh, Don, you're so deep.
8
00:01:26,173 --> 00:01:28,483
Oh- Oh, why, Don, you devil.
9
00:01:28,542 --> 00:01:30,488
[Giggles]
10
00:01:30,544 --> 00:01:34,287
Oh! Oh, well, uh, I'd better
be saying good-bye now.
11
00:01:35,849 --> 00:01:39,160
I can't say that on the phone,
It would embarrass me.
12
00:01:39,219 --> 00:01:41,324
Uh-
13
00:01:41,388 --> 00:01:45,268
[Clears Throat]
All right, um... ditto.
14
00:01:47,561 --> 00:01:49,507
Ditto.
15
00:01:49,563 --> 00:01:51,565
Oh, ditto, ditto.
16
00:01:52,566 --> 00:01:54,512
[ Kisses]
17
00:01:54,568 --> 00:01:56,809
- Well, hLJer.
- Ditto.
18
00:01:57,971 --> 00:02:00,542
- Finished with the letteryet?
- All done.
19
00:02:03,310 --> 00:02:05,347
“Dear Mrs. Willett,
just a reminder...
20
00:02:05,412 --> 00:02:08,359
“it's been six months
since Ricky's last appointment.
21
00:02:08,415 --> 00:02:12,955
I love you with all my heart and soul.
Dnjerry Robinson.“
22
00:02:13,019 --> 00:02:16,489
Sounds good to me, Carol.
just mail it right out.
23
00:02:16,556 --> 00:02:19,503
I don't knowJer.
I guess I had my mind on something else.
24
00:02:19,559 --> 00:02:23,006
- Oh, really? Gee, you'd never know it.
- Oh! Are you being sarcastic?
25
00:02:23,063 --> 00:02:25,475
Me, sarcastic? No!
26
00:02:25,532 --> 00:02:28,172
- Is, uh, Bob in?
-Yes, he's in.
27
00:02:28,235 --> 00:02:30,476
- Good.
- [ Elevator Bell Dings]
28
00:02:30,537 --> 00:02:32,483
Uh, now he's in.
29
00:02:32,539 --> 00:02:35,486
- Morning, Carol. HLJerry.
- Bob, I have to talk to you.
30
00:02:35,542 --> 00:02:38,523
Fine. Oh, uh, Carol,
do I have any messages?
31
00:02:38,578 --> 00:02:41,058
Uh, no. No.
32
00:02:41,114 --> 00:02:44,994
Uh, but, Bob, wait. Did you find
that magazine that had Don's article in it?
33
00:02:45,051 --> 00:02:46,997
Yeah, yeah, finally.
34
00:02:47,053 --> 00:02:50,626
It's kinda hard to get your hands on a copy
of Pharmaceuticals Illustrated.
35
00:02:50,690 --> 00:02:53,637
- Oh.
- Well, the title was kinda provocative.
36
00:02:53,693 --> 00:02:58,836
You know- “Cough Syrups Versus
Throat Lozenges: Take Your Choice.“
37
00:02:58,899 --> 00:03:02,506
I- Listen, he only writes
those articles for a living.
38
00:03:02,569 --> 00:03:05,812
He really wants to be a novelist.
Did I tell you that?
39
00:03:05,872 --> 00:03:09,376
- Yeah, you told me that.
- Come on, Bob. I really have to talk to you.
40
00:03:11,544 --> 00:03:13,490
Door's stuck.
41
00:03:13,546 --> 00:03:15,890
Jerry, I, uh, have an idea.
42
00:03:17,684 --> 00:03:19,686
[Phone Rings]
43
00:03:20,687 --> 00:03:22,792
Dr. Robinson's office.
44
00:03:22,856 --> 00:03:26,065
Oh,just a moment, please,
It's for me. Do you mind?
45
00:03:26,126 --> 00:03:29,198
Mind? Me? No!
Why should I mind? [ Laughs]
46
00:03:34,267 --> 00:03:36,713
Jerry, has my door
done something to upset you?
47
00:03:36,770 --> 00:03:38,716
Oh, no.
48
00:03:38,772 --> 00:03:40,911
It's not your door, Bob.
It's Carol.
49
00:03:40,974 --> 00:03:43,045
She's doing a terriblejob.
50
00:03:48,181 --> 00:03:50,127
Well, I wouldn't say it's terrible.
51
00:03:50,183 --> 00:03:52,789
I think she's been a little preoccupied.
52
00:03:52,852 --> 00:03:56,197
She's going through a period of,
well, being in love.
53
00:03:56,256 --> 00:03:59,931
I know all about that, Bob.
I know all about Don.
54
00:03:59,993 --> 00:04:04,442
I'm sick of hearing about Don. Did you know
yesterday the cleaners lost his pants?
55
00:04:04,497 --> 00:04:08,343
They didn't lose his pants.
The delivery truck had a flat tire.
56
00:04:08,401 --> 00:04:10,972
- He got 'em last night.
- Oh. Good.
57
00:04:12,238 --> 00:04:14,514
She'll be all rightjerry.
lust...
58
00:04:14,574 --> 00:04:17,054
give her a chance.
59
00:04:17,110 --> 00:04:19,750
Oh, Bob, I've given her a chance.
60
00:04:19,813 --> 00:04:21,759
I've given her lots of chances.
61
00:04:21,815 --> 00:04:25,627
I've tried to look the other way.
Made up littlejokes about it.
62
00:04:25,685 --> 00:04:28,632
I've even dropped
a few insignificant hints.
63
00:04:28,688 --> 00:04:30,690
Have you, uh-
64
00:04:32,625 --> 00:04:34,468
Have you tried telling henjerry?
65
00:04:34,527 --> 00:04:38,498
That's not my style, Bob.
My style is being witty, clever, cute.
66
00:04:38,565 --> 00:04:41,068
Move that-
67
00:04:41,134 --> 00:04:43,080
You mean, like yesterday...
68
00:04:43,136 --> 00:04:46,083
when you told her you were gonna have
the phone surgically removed from her ear?
69
00:04:46,139 --> 00:04:49,120
- [ Laughs ] Yeah. That was clever, wasn't it?
- Perfect squelchjerry.
70
00:04:49,175 --> 00:04:51,121
Yeah.
71
00:04:51,177 --> 00:04:54,124
Well, Bob, I mean, doesn't it make you mad
to know that she's out there...
72
00:04:54,180 --> 00:04:57,320
holding a love-in on your time,
possibly ruining your business?
73
00:04:57,384 --> 00:05:00,331
Doesn't that rile you, Bob?
Doesn't that stick in your craw?
74
00:05:00,387 --> 00:05:03,266
Doesn't that make you wanna jump out there
and tell her to shape up?
75
00:05:03,323 --> 00:05:04,666
No.
76
00:05:04,724 --> 00:05:07,000
Well, why not, Bob?
77
00:05:07,060 --> 00:05:09,370
Jerry, those are things
that bug you.
78
00:05:09,429 --> 00:05:11,932
You should be honest with her.
Tell her the way you feel.
79
00:05:11,998 --> 00:05:14,604
That's right, Bob.
I'll do that.
80
00:05:16,269 --> 00:05:19,739
OhJerry, listen, I was wondering-
Are you unhappy with my work?
81
00:05:19,806 --> 00:05:21,752
Me? No!
Why should I be?
82
00:05:21,808 --> 00:05:23,446
I gotta rush.
83
00:05:28,515 --> 00:05:30,552
Hi, honey. I'm home.
84
00:05:30,617 --> 00:05:33,223
Hi, dear.
Where's the cake?
85
00:05:33,286 --> 00:05:36,233
- Cake? What cake?
- Howard's birthday cake for the party tonight.
86
00:05:36,289 --> 00:05:39,133
I called Carol.
She said she'd give you the message.
87
00:05:39,192 --> 00:05:42,571
The only message I got was that
her boyfriend Don had a pepper steak...
88
00:05:42,629 --> 00:05:45,075
and he had a sneezing attack.
89
00:05:45,131 --> 00:05:48,476
Yeah. She told me that. Did she also tell you
he's having trouble with his feet?
90
00:05:48,535 --> 00:05:51,482
- No.
- Yeah, he's got this funny thing with his arch-
91
00:05:51,538 --> 00:05:54,815
Emily, don't tell me. I wanna find out tonight
when I meet him for the first time.
92
00:05:54,874 --> 00:05:58,651
Well, I guess I'd better go get the cake.
What bakery is it at?
93
00:05:58,711 --> 00:06:01,658
- The one in your office building.
- That's a little far.
94
00:06:01,714 --> 00:06:04,593
- I'll go to the corner and get onejust like it.
- Good luck.
95
00:06:04,651 --> 00:06:08,599
It's shaped like a 747 and says,
“I'm Howard. Fly me.“
96
00:06:10,990 --> 00:06:12,936
- Hi, Carol.
- Hi!We're here.
97
00:06:12,992 --> 00:06:14,835
“We're“?
Where's Don?
98
00:06:14,894 --> 00:06:18,239
Jfl Humming “Hail to the Chief“ ]
99
00:06:18,298 --> 00:06:20,244
SEQ“;
100
00:06:20,300 --> 00:06:22,337
- This is Don.
- Hi.
101
00:06:22,402 --> 00:06:25,178
H-Hi, Don.
We've heard a lot about you.
102
00:06:25,238 --> 00:06:27,775
I've heard a lot about you too.
103
00:06:27,841 --> 00:06:32,187
Except I would have known you anywhere
anyway. Happy birthday, Howard.
104
00:06:32,245 --> 00:06:34,657
[Carol]
Oh, n-
105
00:06:34,714 --> 00:06:37,718
These are the Hartleys.
Bob and Emily.
106
00:06:37,784 --> 00:06:41,254
Wow, this is a nice place
you got here, Bob and Emily.
107
00:06:41,321 --> 00:06:43,267
Oh, thank you.
108
00:06:43,323 --> 00:06:45,269
Wow. Ooh. I see.
109
00:06:45,325 --> 00:06:47,271
It's not just an apartment.
110
00:06:47,327 --> 00:06:49,773
This is a home.
111
00:06:49,829 --> 00:06:52,776
A place where,
at the end of a day...
112
00:06:52,832 --> 00:06:56,473
a man can slip into
his smoking jacket and say...
113
00:06:56,536 --> 00:06:59,039
“This is what it's all for.“
114
00:07:00,373 --> 00:07:02,319
This is a haven, a-
115
00:07:02,375 --> 00:07:04,719
a-a-a fortress.
116
00:07:04,777 --> 00:07:08,782
It's a shelter against the sea of life.
117
00:07:10,116 --> 00:07:12,118
How manyjohns you got?
118
00:07:14,621 --> 00:07:17,568
- Two.
- Perfect.
119
00:07:17,624 --> 00:07:21,094
Uh, Don, why don't you sit down
and, uh, rest your feet?
120
00:07:21,161 --> 00:07:24,074
- Yeah. Honey, why don't you make some drinks?
- Sure.
121
00:07:24,130 --> 00:07:26,076
- Carol?
- A glass of wine, Bob.
122
00:07:26,132 --> 00:07:29,079
- Fine. Red or white?
- Well, whatever goes with potato chips.
123
00:07:29,135 --> 00:07:31,581
- That'd be red.
- Oh! He knows everything.
124
00:07:31,638 --> 00:07:35,586
Oh, there's nothing like
the delicate bouquet...
125
00:07:35,642 --> 00:07:38,088
of a scarlet wine...
126
00:07:38,144 --> 00:07:42,524
when it cloys impishly
to the roof of your palate.
127
00:07:44,417 --> 00:07:46,363
What would you like, Don?
128
00:07:46,419 --> 00:07:48,126
I'll have a beer.
129
00:07:50,023 --> 00:07:53,664
- [ Doorbell Buzzes ]
- Oh! That must be the birthday boy.
130
00:07:53,726 --> 00:07:55,603
Aren't we gonna hide?
131
00:07:55,662 --> 00:07:58,199
- It's not a surprise party.
- Oh.
132
00:07:58,264 --> 00:08:01,438
- But you can hide if you want to.
- [ Laughing]
133
00:08:01,501 --> 00:08:03,503
Doorbell Buzzes 1
134
00:08:04,837 --> 00:08:06,783
_ Hi' eve Wb ' Hi!
Ody!
135
00:08:06,839 --> 00:08:09,786
Well, I'm a year older.
Do I look any different?
136
00:08:09,842 --> 00:08:12,288
You don't look any different at all.
Happy 40th.
137
00:08:12,345 --> 00:08:15,189
Sorry we're dressed this way,
but we're flying out in a couple of hours.
138
00:08:15,248 --> 00:08:17,319
Carol, do you remember Mary Ellen?
139
00:08:17,383 --> 00:08:19,329
- Yes. Hi.
- Hi, Carol.
140
00:08:19,385 --> 00:08:22,832
Howard, I'd like you and Mary Ellen
to meet a very good friend of mine.
141
00:08:22,889 --> 00:08:26,063
- Don Livingston.
- Hi, Don. How are you?
142
00:08:26,125 --> 00:08:29,732
Well, 4O years ago...
143
00:08:29,796 --> 00:08:34,836
they dragged you kicking and screaming
into a world you didn't even make.
144
00:08:34,901 --> 00:08:37,939
And today you're soaring over it.
145
00:08:38,004 --> 00:08:39,950
Well, Godspeed, and...
146
00:08:40,006 --> 00:08:42,646
may the wind be at your tail.
147
00:08:44,711 --> 00:08:46,713
Wow.
That was beautiful.
148
00:08:47,847 --> 00:08:50,987
Yeah.
Yeah, that wasn't bad.
149
00:08:53,653 --> 00:08:55,428
Oh, hi, Howard. Hi, Mary Ellen.
150
00:08:55,488 --> 00:08:57,263
- Happy birthday, Howard.
- Thank you
151
00:08:57,323 --> 00:08:59,803
Well, Howard, this is the big one, huh?
152
00:08:59,859 --> 00:09:01,600
- Yeah.
- The old 4-0.
153
00:09:01,661 --> 00:09:04,198
Don't worry about it, Howard.
We all have to face it someday.
154
00:09:04,264 --> 00:09:08,235
Howard, I don't thinkyou've aged a day
in the five years that I know you.
155
00:09:08,301 --> 00:09:10,247
Yeah, but I'm, uh-
156
00:09:10,303 --> 00:09:13,307
I'm starting to slow down a little.
157
00:09:14,807 --> 00:09:17,481
Well, I'm not exactly
slowing down. I'm-
158
00:09:18,878 --> 00:09:20,949
I'm sort ofin a holding pattern.
159
00:09:22,148 --> 00:09:24,094
Actually, I'm picking up steam.
160
00:09:24,150 --> 00:09:26,596
I never felt faster in my whole life.
161
00:09:26,653 --> 00:09:29,896
Uh, Howard, Mary Ellen,
would you like a drink?
162
00:09:29,956 --> 00:09:31,902
Yeah, I'd like a scotch and soda.
163
00:09:31,958 --> 00:09:35,405
Do you thinkyou should?
We have to fly out of here in four hours.
164
00:09:35,461 --> 00:09:37,407
Oh, that's right.
Nothing for me.
165
00:09:37,463 --> 00:09:40,410
I'll have a double gin
on the rocks.
166
00:09:40,466 --> 00:09:43,037
Thought you said
we're flying out in four hours.
167
00:09:43,102 --> 00:09:47,209
Well, I don't have to do anything
except smile coast-to-coast.
168
00:09:48,107 --> 00:09:50,383
Okay, I know where it is.
169
00:09:50,443 --> 00:09:53,049
So, uh, how's-
how's everything going, Don?
170
00:09:53,112 --> 00:09:56,059
Oh, Don, tell him
what you told me yesterday.
171
00:09:56,115 --> 00:09:59,062
You mean about getting my hair
caught in a door?
172
00:09:59,118 --> 00:10:02,725
No, what you said to me
about listening to people.
173
00:10:02,789 --> 00:10:05,292
Oh!
Uh, yeah.
174
00:10:07,560 --> 00:10:11,508
“When you're an observer
of the human condition...
175
00:10:11,564 --> 00:10:14,841
“you must listen
with one ear to the voice...
176
00:10:14,901 --> 00:10:16,847
“one ear to the mind...
177
00:10:16,903 --> 00:10:19,907
and the other ear to the heart.“
178
00:10:22,075 --> 00:10:24,487
That's, uh-
That's a lot of ears.
179
00:10:24,544 --> 00:10:29,493
Oh! Now can't you see why I've got
my head in the clouds at the office, Bob?
180
00:10:29,549 --> 00:10:31,426
- Now I know.
- [Knocking]
181
00:10:31,484 --> 00:10:34,795
Come in.
Oh, hLJer. How are you?
182
00:10:34,854 --> 00:10:37,300
- I've been stood up.
- Oh, no.
183
00:10:37,357 --> 00:10:40,201
Yeah. I don't understand it.
Gail's not the kind of person to do that to me.
184
00:10:40,259 --> 00:10:41,966
- Gail?
- That's right.
185
00:10:42,028 --> 00:10:44,668
- Uh-oh.
- “Uh-oh“ what? What “Uh-oh“?
186
00:10:44,731 --> 00:10:49,874
Uh-oh, you're right. She's not the kind of
person to stand you up. She left a message.
187
00:10:49,936 --> 00:10:52,883
- I never got a message.
- Well, I-it's at the office...
188
00:10:52,939 --> 00:10:55,510
in my Bride magazine,
keeping my place.
189
00:10:55,575 --> 00:10:57,452
- What?
Jerry, I'm sorry.
190
00:10:57,510 --> 00:11:00,457
But I can remember it.
I know I can. I'll paraphrase it.
191
00:11:00,513 --> 00:11:03,392
It said, urn,
Don't pick me up at my apartment.
192
00:11:03,449 --> 00:11:06,453
I'll meet you at the aquarium.
193
00:11:06,519 --> 00:11:09,523
And don't be late,
because the aquarium closes at 8:00.
194
00:11:10,590 --> 00:11:12,536
It's 9:30.
195
00:11:12,592 --> 00:11:15,038
That means Gail's been standing
on the steps of the aquarium...
196
00:11:15,094 --> 00:11:17,540
a hundred feet from the lake,
for an hour and a half...
197
00:11:17,597 --> 00:11:20,237
with that cold Lake Michigan wind
whipping through her frail body?
198
00:11:20,299 --> 00:11:22,301
Oh, that's good stuff.
199
00:11:24,604 --> 00:11:26,743
Jeri')!-
200
00:11:26,806 --> 00:11:30,049
Well, I'm gonna see if I can catch up to Gail.
Bob, Emily, I'll see you later.
201
00:11:30,109 --> 00:11:32,851
Happy birthday, Howard.
Don, nice to have met you.
202
00:11:32,912 --> 00:11:36,018
Don't stand up. I know about your feet.
Mary Ellen, nice to see you again.
203
00:11:36,082 --> 00:11:38,084
And, Carol, you're fired.
204
00:11:45,658 --> 00:11:49,071
Except for that part about being fired,
he seemed like a nice guy.
205
00:11:54,066 --> 00:11:57,013
Carol, stop packing.
You're not going anywhere.
206
00:11:57,069 --> 00:11:59,447
Ah! I've been fired.
Remember?
207
00:11:59,505 --> 00:12:04,511
And I am merely packing up some of the
lovely mementoes given to me by the doctors...
208
00:12:04,577 --> 00:12:07,786
during my long years
of dedicated service.
209
00:12:07,847 --> 00:12:10,054
My pen and pencil set.
210
00:12:10,116 --> 00:12:12,528
Ah.
Complementary nose drops.
211
00:12:12,585 --> 00:12:15,759
And this permanently
engraved cup which reads...
212
00:12:15,822 --> 00:12:17,768
“Our Girl Forever.“
213
00:12:17,824 --> 00:12:19,770
- Ha!
- [Cup Slams On Desk]
214
00:12:19,826 --> 00:12:24,002
Now all I'm missing is
my autographed whoopee cushion.
215
00:12:25,431 --> 00:12:27,638
- It's in the storage cabinet.
- [E/e vator Bell Ding; ]
216
00:12:29,168 --> 00:12:31,705
Hi, Bob.
Hi, Carol.
217
00:12:31,771 --> 00:12:33,717
Oh, there he is.
Whoopee.
218
00:12:33,773 --> 00:12:36,777
- What are you doing?
- I'm leaving.
219
00:12:36,843 --> 00:12:39,790
You didn't think
I was serious last night, did you?
220
00:12:39,846 --> 00:12:43,293
- See, Carol? He wasn't serious.
- I was, Bob, at the time.
221
00:12:43,349 --> 00:12:46,296
But later, at the aquarium,
I was talking to the night watchman.
222
00:12:46,352 --> 00:12:50,698
You know what he said?
“To err is human, to forgive divine, Mac.“
223
00:12:50,756 --> 00:12:53,134
So...
224
00:12:53,192 --> 00:12:56,173
I thought about it,
and I decided to do the divine thing.
225
00:12:56,229 --> 00:12:58,175
You can come back, Carol.
226
00:12:58,231 --> 00:13:00,177
Aw, j er.
227
00:13:00,233 --> 00:13:04,010
Is this the part where I fall to my knees
and kiss your tunic?
228
00:13:04,070 --> 00:13:06,016
I tried.
229
00:13:06,072 --> 00:13:09,849
Jerry wants you to come back. We all want
you to come back. You're not fired anymore.
230
00:13:09,909 --> 00:13:14,949
Bob, why should I come back to work at a place
where one of the men I work for hates me?
231
00:13:16,082 --> 00:13:18,028
L- UhJerry, you, uh-
232
00:13:18,084 --> 00:13:20,030
-you don't hate her, do you?
- No.
233
00:13:20,086 --> 00:13:23,033
- An-And you want her to come back, right?
- Yeah.
234
00:13:23,089 --> 00:13:25,467
- And you're sorry that you fired her?
- Right.
235
00:13:25,525 --> 00:13:28,665
Why do I get the feeling
Bob's a ventriloquist?
236
00:13:28,728 --> 00:13:31,675
Look, Carol, what do you
want me to do, beg you?
237
00:13:31,731 --> 00:13:34,211
That would be nice.
238
00:13:34,267 --> 00:13:36,873
All right, um,
please come back.
239
00:13:36,936 --> 00:13:40,213
We, uh- We need you,
and we- we want you.
240
00:13:40,273 --> 00:13:42,879
- And?
- And, uh-[ Mutters]
241
00:13:42,942 --> 00:13:45,684
- What?
- I'm sorry.
242
00:13:45,745 --> 00:13:49,022
- Now, will you come back?
- Oh...
243
00:13:49,081 --> 00:13:51,186
well, okay, I'll come back.
244
00:13:51,250 --> 00:13:53,696
Good. But there are gonna have
to be some changes around here.
245
00:13:53,753 --> 00:13:55,198
Oh,jerry. What changes?
246
00:13:55,254 --> 00:13:58,701
Well, we're gonna have to get some
powdered milk for the coffee, for one thing.
247
00:13:58,758 --> 00:14:01,295
- That's no problem, is it, Carol?
- No.
248
00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:03,237
And you're gonna have to
type up decent letters.
249
00:14:03,296 --> 00:14:05,742
- That is certainly reasonable, isn't it?
- Reasonable.
250
00:14:05,798 --> 00:14:08,244
- And get my messages to me?
- You can do that, right?
251
00:14:08,301 --> 00:14:12,249
- Indeed, yes.
- Good. We're back to business as usual.
252
00:14:12,305 --> 00:14:15,514
Oh, terrific. I can't wait to call Don
and give him the good news.
253
00:14:15,575 --> 00:14:18,522
Oh-oh-oh-oh! You see,
that's, uh- that's the other thing.
254
00:14:18,578 --> 00:14:21,081
Personal calls?
There won't be any.
255
00:14:21,147 --> 00:14:23,593
Not at any time,
and not to anybody.
256
00:14:23,649 --> 00:14:26,596
Not incoming, outgoing,
none of that stuff.
257
00:14:26,652 --> 00:14:29,861
Especially, and including,
your boyfriend, Dr. Scholl.
258
00:14:33,392 --> 00:14:36,066
Just a minute, Dr. Robinson.
259
00:14:36,128 --> 00:14:39,439
Now, you cannot tell me
not to have personal calls...
260
00:14:39,498 --> 00:14:42,445
because I am a person
and I have a life.
261
00:14:42,501 --> 00:14:46,574
The only way to have that life is for you
not to tell me how to live that life.
262
00:14:46,639 --> 00:14:50,883
- Youjust about finished?
- No. I'll tell you the rest after I call Don.
263
00:14:50,943 --> 00:14:53,719
- Don't forget to tell Don that
you've been fired again. - Again?
264
00:14:53,779 --> 00:14:56,259
- That's right!
- Well, good!
265
00:14:56,315 --> 00:15:00,263
Now you canjust cough up
another two weeks' severance pay!
266
00:15:01,420 --> 00:15:03,297
At least I'm already packed.
267
00:15:03,356 --> 00:15:06,200
Oh, uh, Carol, would you make
an appointment at the barber for me?
268
00:15:06,258 --> 00:15:09,205
Bob, I can't make
any calls for you...
269
00:15:09,261 --> 00:15:12,640
I can't make any calls forjerry,
I can't make any calls for myself...
270
00:15:12,698 --> 00:15:14,803
because, well,
I don't work here anymore.
271
00:15:14,867 --> 00:15:17,279
- [ Elevator Bell Dings]
- I've been fired.
272
00:15:23,709 --> 00:15:26,383
All right.
I could call myself.
273
00:15:33,219 --> 00:15:36,666
I hope you guys understand. I fired her,
I hired her back, then I fired her again.
274
00:15:36,722 --> 00:15:40,670
I've lost all perspective, so whatever
you guys decide, it's okay with me.
275
00:15:40,726 --> 00:15:43,730
The woman is a detriment.
Let's dump her.
276
00:15:44,830 --> 00:15:46,776
Wait a minute, Phil.
277
00:15:46,832 --> 00:15:49,278
Carol has always been
very nice to me...
278
00:15:49,335 --> 00:15:52,282
and she seemed to have
a genuine interest in urology.
279
00:15:52,338 --> 00:15:54,579
In three years,
she never dropped one specimen.
280
00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:58,747
Well, I think we all like Carol.
There's no argument about that.
281
00:15:58,811 --> 00:16:03,021
Well, if you want my professional opinion
of her work, it stinks.
282
00:16:03,082 --> 00:16:05,528
If you want a second opinion,
he's right.
283
00:16:05,584 --> 00:16:09,259
Well, I'll have to admit
maybe lately she's been a little remiss.
284
00:16:09,321 --> 00:16:11,631
- But I-
- I think we should can her.
285
00:16:11,691 --> 00:16:13,534
- You know what I think?
- What, Bernie?
286
00:16:13,592 --> 00:16:18,132
I was thinking how nice it was we could
all get together in your office, Bob.
287
00:16:18,197 --> 00:16:20,268
We haven't done this in a long time.
288
00:16:20,332 --> 00:16:23,779
It boils down to this-
lfshe's not doing thejob, we bounce her.
289
00:16:23,836 --> 00:16:27,045
- [ Phone Ringing]
- I mean, what do we need her for?
290
00:16:27,106 --> 00:16:30,053
- [ Ringing Continues]
- For that, for one reason.
291
00:16:30,109 --> 00:16:33,784
- Hey, uh, Bernie, get the phone, will ya.
- Why me? Let Phil get it.
292
00:16:33,846 --> 00:16:35,792
I just sat down.
293
00:16:35,848 --> 00:16:38,886
- Do you want me to get it?
- Forget it, Ralph. We're having a meeting.
294
00:16:38,951 --> 00:16:41,898
- Just let it ring.
- Let it ring? What do you mean?
295
00:16:41,954 --> 00:16:44,958
We're doctors.
Let the dentist get it.
296
00:16:48,294 --> 00:16:50,740
- Never mind. I'll get it.
- [ Ringing Continues]
297
00:16:50,796 --> 00:16:52,742
Could be a sick person.
298
00:16:52,798 --> 00:16:55,438
You know, really
this is very easy.
299
00:16:55,501 --> 00:16:58,448
Carol comes late in the morning,
she leaves early...
300
00:16:58,504 --> 00:17:01,451
and she keeps the phone tied up
with her personal calls.
301
00:17:01,507 --> 00:17:04,920
- Sol say we dump her.
- I really don't think it's been that bad.
302
00:17:04,977 --> 00:17:07,890
It was Carol's hairdresser.
303
00:17:07,947 --> 00:17:09,893
Ball game! Ball game!
304
00:17:09,949 --> 00:17:11,895
She's out.
305
00:17:11,951 --> 00:17:13,897
Wait.
Carol works for all of us.
306
00:17:13,953 --> 00:17:18,766
I think all of us should decide whether
she goes or stays- notjustjerry, not just you.
307
00:17:18,824 --> 00:17:21,828
He's absolutely right.
This is a democracy.
308
00:17:21,894 --> 00:17:24,340
No, it isn't.
It's a doctors' office.
309
00:17:24,396 --> 00:17:27,002
We are talking about
life and death here.
310
00:17:27,066 --> 00:17:30,343
Phil, you're a plastic surgeon.
What's life and death about a nosejob?
311
00:17:32,138 --> 00:17:35,085
- I think we have to vote.
- [ Phone Ringing]
312
00:17:35,141 --> 00:17:38,122
- Your turn to catch the phone, Phil.
- My turn?
313
00:17:38,177 --> 00:17:40,179
We're taking turns?
Oh, goody.
314
00:17:41,514 --> 00:17:43,460
Well, what are we voting on?
315
00:17:43,516 --> 00:17:45,962
- [ Ringing Continues]
- Hey how do you work this thing?
316
00:17:46,018 --> 00:17:50,194
- Wait a minute. I'll show you.
- I'm gonna go make some coffee.
317
00:17:54,193 --> 00:17:57,640
Well, the two of us can't vote.
We're not a quorum.
318
00:17:57,696 --> 00:18:00,700
- Phone for you, Bernie.
- Oh, excuse me, Bob.
319
00:18:06,205 --> 00:18:08,412
Hello? Oh.
320
00:18:08,474 --> 00:18:11,421
Oh,yes, Mr. Evans. Yes.
What? Oh, no, no.
321
00:18:11,477 --> 00:18:14,424
You can't fool around
with that kind of stuff byyourself.
322
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:16,960
Come in and let me take a look at it.
323
00:18:17,016 --> 00:18:20,054
Do you dial eight or nine
for an outside line?
324
00:18:20,119 --> 00:18:23,066
Would it be okay
if I made tea instead of coffee?
325
00:18:23,122 --> 00:18:26,262
- No, I'd rather have coffee.
- Well, make it yourself. I'm having tea.
326
00:18:26,325 --> 00:18:28,999
- Anybody know the number of the hospital?
- [Newman] No.
327
00:18:29,061 --> 00:18:32,065
[Ringing Continues
328
00:18:33,666 --> 00:18:36,613
- Why doesn't this phone stop ringing?
- [ Ringing Continues]
329
00:18:36,669 --> 00:18:39,445
This looks like an ant farm.
330
00:18:39,505 --> 00:18:43,885
Can we take a vote on this thing?
I've got a 2:30 face-sanding.
331
00:18:43,943 --> 00:18:46,082
Uh, no, she's not here.
332
00:18:46,145 --> 00:18:48,421
- I call for a vote.
- I second!
333
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:52,587
- There are only five of us. What about the other
six doctors? - They'll do whatever we say.
334
00:18:52,651 --> 00:18:55,598
Wait a minute.
Totten filled out a proxy.
335
00:18:55,654 --> 00:18:58,965
Since he went to the trouble of filling it out,
we ought to see what he has to say.
336
00:18:59,024 --> 00:19:02,801
- Oh, a proxy. What does it say?
- “Either way.“
337
00:19:04,430 --> 00:19:06,205
Okay, are we all set to vote?
338
00:19:06,265 --> 00:19:09,303
How do we do this?
I think it should be a secret ballot.
339
00:19:09,368 --> 00:19:12,508
- Why don't we just raise our hands?
- What's secret about that?
340
00:19:12,571 --> 00:19:15,780
All right, we'll put our heads down
on our desks.
341
00:19:15,841 --> 00:19:20,722
Why don't we get scraps of paper,
write on 'em, and throw 'em in a hat?
342
00:19:20,779 --> 00:19:22,725
Okay, that's a good idea.
343
00:19:22,781 --> 00:19:26,729
All right, “Yes“ means we keep her
and “No“ means we dump her.
344
00:19:26,785 --> 00:19:28,731
- We've got a problem here.
- What?
345
00:19:28,787 --> 00:19:31,461
- No hat.
- Maybe we could use a bowl.
346
00:19:31,523 --> 00:19:34,527
- I've got one in my office.
- No, no! No, no!
347
00:19:36,161 --> 00:19:38,163
L-I don't think so.
348
00:19:39,999 --> 00:19:42,980
Hey, Bob, uh,
get that guy's, uh-
349
00:19:43,035 --> 00:19:44,981
Uh, sir, excuse me.
350
00:19:45,037 --> 00:19:48,484
We're taking a vote here, and I wonder if
you'd be kind enough to lend us your hat...
351
00:19:48,540 --> 00:19:50,986
to sort of, you know, vote into.
352
00:19:51,043 --> 00:19:54,513
Oh, voting, huh? Sure.
Only in America.
353
00:19:54,580 --> 00:19:56,526
It'll just be a minute.
354
00:19:56,582 --> 00:20:00,155
- I still don't see why we just couldn't raise
our hands. - Oh, no, this is better, Phil.
355
00:20:00,219 --> 00:20:02,165
I think a secret ballot
is important.
356
00:20:02,221 --> 00:20:04,167
All right, here we go.
357
00:20:04,223 --> 00:20:07,432
“Yes.
Bernard Tupperman, MD.“
358
00:20:09,962 --> 00:20:12,238
All I had was my business card.
359
00:20:13,599 --> 00:20:16,102
another “yes?
360
00:20:16,168 --> 00:20:18,170
One “No.“
361
00:20:19,204 --> 00:20:21,206
“Dump her.“
362
00:20:24,510 --> 00:20:26,512
This one doesn't have anything.
363
00:20:27,579 --> 00:20:29,525
Well, I, uh, abstained.
364
00:20:29,581 --> 00:20:32,027
Why? You're the one who fired her
in the first place.
365
00:20:32,084 --> 00:20:34,530
- I call for another vote.
- I'll just abstain again.
366
00:20:34,586 --> 00:20:37,192
I get the feeling we're gonna be
locked up in a hotel room all night.
367
00:20:37,256 --> 00:20:39,930
We gotta keep voting
till we break the tie.
368
00:20:39,992 --> 00:20:43,064
Maybe I could helpyou out.
Could I vote?
369
00:20:43,128 --> 00:20:45,233
No, no.
You don't know the issues.
370
00:20:45,297 --> 00:20:49,302
Then there's no difference
between this and any other election.
371
00:20:53,372 --> 00:20:56,819
I'm afraid we couldn't let you vote.
372
00:20:56,875 --> 00:20:58,821
Okay.
373
00:20:58,877 --> 00:21:01,915
If I can't vote, I want my hat back.
374
00:21:07,553 --> 00:21:11,501
I don't know. I couldn't have gotten
through this if it weren't for Don.
375
00:21:11,557 --> 00:21:14,003
He is just a pillar of strength.
376
00:21:14,059 --> 00:21:16,505
- [Grunts] Ooh!
- Ooh!
377
00:21:16,562 --> 00:21:18,974
Except for his feet.
378
00:21:19,031 --> 00:21:21,477
Don't worry about that, Carol.
379
00:21:21,533 --> 00:21:24,776
The thing that really hurts me
is what you've been going through.
380
00:21:24,837 --> 00:21:29,286
I mean, I'm not gonna let them
do anything like this to you again.
381
00:21:29,341 --> 00:21:32,288
Hemingway would never
let this happen to his girl.
382
00:21:32,344 --> 00:21:35,291
Norman Mailer would
never let it happen.
383
00:21:35,347 --> 00:21:38,055
Truman Capote
would never let it happen.
384
00:21:38,117 --> 00:21:41,496
Well, maybe that's not a good example.
But you know what I mean?
385
00:21:41,553 --> 00:21:46,024
We do, Don, and it's wonderful that
you're sticking up foryour girl like this.
386
00:21:46,091 --> 00:21:49,038
Well, what else can a man do?
387
00:21:49,094 --> 00:21:51,040
[Emily Chuckles]
388
00:21:51,096 --> 00:21:54,771
I mean, life is-
runs in a circle here!
389
00:21:54,833 --> 00:21:57,279
It's like a bunch of hills...
390
00:21:57,336 --> 00:22:01,478
and we climb to the top
and look down in the valleys...
391
00:22:01,540 --> 00:22:03,486
and that's it.
392
00:22:04,910 --> 00:22:07,186
I'm gonna soak my feet.
393
00:22:07,246 --> 00:22:10,193
- Uh, the Epsom salt's in the bathroom, Don.
- Perfect.
394
00:22:10,249 --> 00:22:12,195
[Grunts]
395
00:22:12,251 --> 00:22:14,857
Life is a...
396
00:22:14,920 --> 00:22:17,662
bunch of hills.
397
00:22:17,723 --> 00:22:19,999
- Hi, honey.
- Oh, hi, dear.
398
00:22:20,059 --> 00:22:23,563
Oh, hi, Carol. I'm glad you're still here.
I got some great news.
399
00:22:23,629 --> 00:22:27,236
Jerry will be right up.
- Oh! You made my clay, Bob.
400
00:22:27,299 --> 00:22:29,245
- What floor are we on?
- The fifth.
401
00:22:29,301 --> 00:22:31,303
- Too high.
- Mm-hmm.
402
00:22:31,370 --> 00:22:34,317
But, Carol, everything's
gonna be all right.
403
00:22:34,373 --> 00:22:39,083
Jerry wants to come over and do one thing-
apologize, tell you he's sorry you left...
404
00:22:39,144 --> 00:22:41,385
and- and watch the football game.
405
00:22:41,447 --> 00:22:45,918
Oh, Bob, I hopejerry means it this time, 'cause
I don't think Carol can go through this again.
406
00:22:45,984 --> 00:22:48,931
He does, Emily. As a matter of fact,
he cast the deciding vote.
407
00:22:48,987 --> 00:22:50,398
Really, Bob?
408
00:22:50,456 --> 00:22:53,665
He made a great speech about
what a great person you were.
409
00:22:53,725 --> 00:22:57,036
He said we should all be more understanding,
and he demanded another vote...
410
00:22:57,096 --> 00:22:59,042
and it was almost unanimous.
411
00:22:59,098 --> 00:23:01,442
- What do you mean “almost“?
- Newman.
412
00:23:01,500 --> 00:23:03,537
- Yea h.
- [Knocking]
413
00:23:05,137 --> 00:23:07,515
Oh. Jerry!
414
00:23:07,573 --> 00:23:09,951
Jerry!
Oh, thank you, thank you.
415
00:23:10,008 --> 00:23:12,955
And you were right- I was horrible.
I was a terrible secretary.
416
00:23:13,011 --> 00:23:15,958
It'll never happen again.
I'll be much better, I promise.
417
00:23:16,014 --> 00:23:19,393
It doesn't matter, because
I came to fire you againjust kidding!
418
00:23:20,686 --> 00:23:23,292
Say, Emily,
I was wondering if you have a-
419
00:23:24,590 --> 00:23:27,070
Oh. Wait a minute.
420
00:23:27,126 --> 00:23:30,073
Aren't you the guy
that keeps firing my girl?
421
00:23:30,129 --> 00:23:32,131
-I guess I am.
- Yeah?
422
00:23:37,603 --> 00:23:41,176
- Are you gonna hire her back?
- I already did.
423
00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:43,811
I'm sorry I had to do that.
424
00:23:49,815 --> 00:23:51,761
Ah, there they are now-
425
00:23:51,817 --> 00:23:54,320
Drs. Hartley, Tupperman andjudas.
426
00:23:57,756 --> 00:24:00,828
- It's very nice to have you back, Carol.
- Thank you.
427
00:24:00,893 --> 00:24:02,770
Oh, Bob.
428
00:24:02,828 --> 00:24:05,274
Here.
Let me get that for you.
429
00:24:05,330 --> 00:24:07,276
- Oh. Good.
- [ Phone Ringing]
430
00:24:07,332 --> 00:24:11,212
And I'll get that for you.
I think I know how this works now.
431
00:24:12,204 --> 00:24:14,650
Hello?
432
00:24:14,706 --> 00:24:16,652
Oh, hi- hi, Don.
433
00:24:16,708 --> 00:24:18,745
It's good hearing your voice too.
434
00:24:20,212 --> 00:24:23,421
Li- Life- Life is like
a merry-go-round?
435
00:24:25,250 --> 00:24:27,252
Wh-Wh-Why is that, Don?
436
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:30,322
They both have horses.
437
00:25:10,796 --> 00:25:12,537
[ Mews]
36063
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