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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:30,260 --> 00:01:32,460 Do you think l look lesbian? 2 00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:37,660 The Home Office always deals with fake weddings. Maybe they can tell. 3 00:01:37,860 --> 00:01:42,060 - What time are they coming? - Half three. Lance is climbing the wall. 4 00:01:42,260 --> 00:01:44,460 lt's probably just routine. 5 00:01:44,660 --> 00:01:47,660 - Yeah. - Anyway, thanks for the lift. 6 00:01:48,660 --> 00:01:51,660 Now, you look after your mother, big fella. 7 00:02:00,860 --> 00:02:02,860 See ya. 8 00:02:07,860 --> 00:02:11,660 You might want to check out the Sahara. lt's more robust. 9 00:02:11,660 --> 00:02:13,660 l'm thinking family man. 10 00:02:13,860 --> 00:02:16,260 - l like this one. - Just think Sahara. 11 00:02:16,260 --> 00:02:18,860 lt's more expensive but the Sport, 12 00:02:19,060 --> 00:02:21,460 you get a lot of gay guys buying this one. 13 00:02:21,460 --> 00:02:26,060 OK, they're cutting edge. But a man like yourself, l'm thinking image. 14 00:02:27,260 --> 00:02:30,260 - l like this one. - Those lads - money to burn. 15 00:02:30,460 --> 00:02:33,060 Then they die young so we get the resale value. 16 00:02:33,060 --> 00:02:36,260 Take it for a spin and sign this when you get back. 17 00:02:41,460 --> 00:02:43,460 (Engine revving) 18 00:02:59,260 --> 00:03:00,460 Where do l sign? 19 00:03:02,260 --> 00:03:04,460 l'm back. Have you missed me? 20 00:03:04,460 --> 00:03:06,660 - How was Scotland? - Scottish. 21 00:03:06,860 --> 00:03:10,460 So, er, what's the news, Mr Tyler, sir? 22 00:03:10,460 --> 00:03:12,860 Refrigeration's gonna close. Ten jobs gone. 23 00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:15,660 Not shop news, l don't want shop news. 24 00:03:15,660 --> 00:03:18,260 l want news. 25 00:03:18,260 --> 00:03:20,660 Jill, Rosalie... 26 00:03:20,660 --> 00:03:24,060 - Steady the buffers, she's back! - Hiya! How you doin'? 27 00:03:26,060 --> 00:03:28,260 (Rosalie) No. (Marcie) You must have. 28 00:03:28,460 --> 00:03:32,860 (Rosalie) He did, cos l was watching. lt was revolting! 29 00:03:33,060 --> 00:03:35,660 - Vince?! - (Laughter) 30 00:03:39,860 --> 00:03:43,660 Wilfred Owen was shot dead on the 4th of November, 1918, 31 00:03:43,860 --> 00:03:46,060 just seven days before the armistice. 32 00:03:46,260 --> 00:03:50,260 Thing is, sir, he was queer, Wilfred Owen. Says so in the front. 33 00:03:50,260 --> 00:03:53,860 You can't teach us about poofs. You're not allowed. 34 00:03:54,060 --> 00:03:57,260 Thank you, it's got nothing to do with his poetry. 35 00:03:57,260 --> 00:04:01,660 Though no doubt he found lots to do in the trenches other than fight. 36 00:04:01,860 --> 00:04:05,660 Sir, they all said, ''Here comes Owen! Backs to the wall!'' 37 00:04:05,660 --> 00:04:09,660 Thank you, Christian. Now, if you could look at the preface of 1918 - 38 00:04:09,860 --> 00:04:15,460 ''My subject is war, the pity of war, the poetry is in the pity.'' 39 00:04:15,660 --> 00:04:18,660 Cos l can leave. As soon as l'm 16, l'm leaving. 40 00:04:18,660 --> 00:04:22,060 lf me and Dazz get that flat, l'll get a job in the Village. 41 00:04:22,260 --> 00:04:25,460 l'll get bar work. They never ask your age, Dazz said. 42 00:04:33,660 --> 00:04:36,260 - What was that about? - Nothing. 43 00:04:37,260 --> 00:04:40,460 - Was he looking at me? - lt's not always you. 44 00:04:42,660 --> 00:04:45,460 Did l tell you? Gary's moved in. 45 00:04:45,660 --> 00:04:47,460 Mum asked him last week. 46 00:04:47,660 --> 00:04:49,660 Moved in weekend. 47 00:04:51,860 --> 00:04:53,260 Like you care. 48 00:04:53,260 --> 00:04:56,460 lt's all Nathan and Dazz. Dazz and the flat and the Village. 49 00:04:56,460 --> 00:05:00,660 Me, l could be bleeding from the eyes. 50 00:05:02,660 --> 00:05:04,460 Sorry. 51 00:05:04,660 --> 00:05:06,660 So, how's it going? 52 00:05:06,660 --> 00:05:09,260 Me mum's happy. You should hear 'em at night. 53 00:05:12,460 --> 00:05:15,860 He keeps walking out the bathroom naked. 54 00:05:15,860 --> 00:05:19,660 - (Phone) - Drove it straight through the window! 55 00:05:19,660 --> 00:05:21,660 They've been shouting all sorts. 56 00:05:21,860 --> 00:05:25,260 ''We're suing for damages. Put me through to Mr Burton.'' 57 00:05:25,260 --> 00:05:28,060 - What did Burton say? - He said, ''Fuck them.'' 58 00:05:28,060 --> 00:05:33,460 He did. He said, ''We'll counter sue and we'll tell the papers what your man said. 59 00:05:33,660 --> 00:05:36,460 ''You're up against a PR company now.'' 60 00:05:36,660 --> 00:05:38,660 Lisa Levine, says it's urgent. 61 00:05:38,660 --> 00:05:42,260 - What's happening? - They arrived early, just walked in. 62 00:05:42,460 --> 00:05:46,660 No smiles, no tea, straight down to business. lt's looking good. 63 00:05:46,660 --> 00:05:51,460 Hang on, l'll get you on the mobile. Sandra, cancel everything this afternoon. 64 00:05:51,660 --> 00:05:55,060 - l'm going out. - Where? Ram raiding? 65 00:05:55,260 --> 00:05:57,260 Hey, get me a stereo. 66 00:05:58,460 --> 00:06:00,060 So, what have they said? 67 00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:04,860 lt's confidential. They asked me to leave. Lance said l'm the baby-sitter. 68 00:06:05,060 --> 00:06:06,860 Hold on. 69 00:06:10,260 --> 00:06:12,460 So have they got the letters? 70 00:06:12,460 --> 00:06:16,860 - They've got something... Oh, yes. - 'What's happening?' 71 00:06:17,060 --> 00:06:19,260 What the fuck's happening? Lisa! 72 00:06:19,460 --> 00:06:21,660 That's it. Come on, Lance. 73 00:06:21,860 --> 00:06:25,460 'Jesus Christ, you stupid dyke, tell me what's happening!' 74 00:06:25,460 --> 00:06:27,860 (Gasps) Fantastic! 75 00:06:29,260 --> 00:06:31,460 Lisa? Lisa! 76 00:06:41,860 --> 00:06:45,660 (Romey) He's gone through all the official channels. 77 00:06:45,660 --> 00:06:47,660 Was it you? 78 00:06:47,660 --> 00:06:50,660 - Was it you? - What? l got this for Alfred. 79 00:06:50,860 --> 00:06:55,260 - Someone told them, Stuart, was it you? - Told them what? 80 00:06:55,460 --> 00:06:58,260 - lt's a mistake... - (Lisa) Quite a temper, our Lance. 81 00:06:58,260 --> 00:07:02,260 Punched the man from the Home Office, then punched the arresting officer. 82 00:07:05,060 --> 00:07:08,060 l think his visa application is officially null and void. 83 00:07:08,060 --> 00:07:12,460 - Lisa, go with him. He'll need a solicitor. - l can't, l'm involved. 84 00:07:12,660 --> 00:07:15,860 - He needs you! - l'll phone the office. 85 00:07:16,060 --> 00:07:20,860 Of course it was you! You never liked him, never wanted him in that house. 86 00:07:21,060 --> 00:07:25,860 - l don't know what you're talking about. - They knew the wedding was a fake. 87 00:07:25,860 --> 00:07:28,260 They had my things from the house. 88 00:07:30,860 --> 00:07:33,660 Mr Jordan, who told you? Who gave you the letters? 89 00:07:33,860 --> 00:07:39,260 l'm not allowed to say - but if you see Nathan Maloney, tell him thanks a bunch. 90 00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:41,460 Nathan? 91 00:07:43,460 --> 00:07:45,460 (Mobile phone) 92 00:07:47,260 --> 00:07:49,060 Hello? 93 00:07:55,860 --> 00:07:57,860 lt was your tie. 94 00:07:59,860 --> 00:08:03,860 There was a man on Changing Rooms last night wearing the same tie. 95 00:08:04,060 --> 00:08:06,660 We were laughing at your tie. 96 00:08:07,660 --> 00:08:11,260 l haven't said anything, in case you're wondering. 97 00:08:11,260 --> 00:08:14,060 But if you're ashamed, then it's up to you. 98 00:08:14,260 --> 00:08:17,260 - l'm not ashamed. - You're not exactly proud, Vince. 99 00:08:20,060 --> 00:08:23,260 Carter sent this. He wants it back Monday. 100 00:08:23,260 --> 00:08:25,260 Yeah. Thanks. 101 00:08:29,260 --> 00:08:31,860 lt's not that bad. Your tie. 102 00:08:34,260 --> 00:08:36,060 Yeah. lt didn't cost much. 103 00:08:36,260 --> 00:08:38,060 Bargain. l got it from... 104 00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:49,460 Hazel! We've got lesbians. 105 00:08:52,060 --> 00:08:54,460 And l'm out of herbal tea. 106 00:08:54,660 --> 00:08:56,260 Nathan! 107 00:08:56,460 --> 00:08:59,660 You treat that baby like a toy, like you don't care. 108 00:08:59,660 --> 00:09:02,460 And Lance? Lance'd take over. 109 00:09:02,660 --> 00:09:05,460 He'd be dad and you'd say nothing. 110 00:09:05,460 --> 00:09:07,460 But l know what you're like. 111 00:09:07,660 --> 00:09:11,660 You love him and you'd never say, so l said it for you. 112 00:09:11,860 --> 00:09:14,660 - Lance is going to be deported. - l don't care! 113 00:09:14,860 --> 00:09:16,460 Jesus Christ. 114 00:09:16,660 --> 00:09:20,860 l don't give a toss about Lance. Look at all l've done - left my family, 115 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:25,060 - left Donna, just for you. - Keeps going back to you, Stuart. 116 00:09:25,260 --> 00:09:29,860 - How was l to know? - lt's all your fault cos you just shag! 117 00:09:30,060 --> 00:09:33,060 You keep going every night and you never look back. 118 00:09:34,260 --> 00:09:36,060 Look at what you've done, look at him. 119 00:09:36,060 --> 00:09:40,460 l didn't know, Romey. lf l'd known, l'd have... 120 00:09:41,460 --> 00:09:43,260 l don't know. 121 00:09:43,260 --> 00:09:45,460 And l chose you as the father. 122 00:09:47,860 --> 00:09:50,860 You chose Lance as the husband and look at him. 123 00:09:51,060 --> 00:09:53,060 Slightest trouble, out with the fists. 124 00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:57,060 Do you want a man like that living with your kid? 125 00:09:57,060 --> 00:09:59,060 Maybe not. 126 00:10:04,860 --> 00:10:09,060 - You all right, then, stranger? - Yeah. Thanks for that. 127 00:10:09,260 --> 00:10:11,060 l just... 128 00:10:12,260 --> 00:10:14,260 l dunno. 129 00:10:14,460 --> 00:10:16,460 Keep waiting for the punch line. 130 00:10:19,660 --> 00:10:22,260 No, l'm not complaining. 131 00:10:22,260 --> 00:10:25,060 l like art. l'm good at art. 132 00:10:25,260 --> 00:10:28,460 Those pictures of dogs playing poker, l love 'em. 133 00:10:28,660 --> 00:10:31,260 Magic Eye pictures, fantastic. 134 00:10:31,460 --> 00:10:33,860 l saw one once, it was a duck. 135 00:10:35,060 --> 00:10:37,460 You looked for long enough and there was a duck. 136 00:10:37,660 --> 00:10:39,660 Brilliant. Worth millions. 137 00:10:39,860 --> 00:10:42,460 l've just got to stay for the speech. 138 00:10:42,460 --> 00:10:46,060 No, fine. Me and art, we're like that. 139 00:10:46,260 --> 00:10:49,660 Art Garfunkel. Bright Eyes, burning like fire. 140 00:10:50,660 --> 00:10:55,260 Now, there's a film. Apparently, those rabbits weren't real. 141 00:10:55,460 --> 00:10:56,860 Fooled me. 142 00:11:01,860 --> 00:11:04,060 - All right, let's go. - Don't be daft. 143 00:11:05,260 --> 00:11:07,260 l can be in the same room. 144 00:11:14,660 --> 00:11:16,660 Stuart. 145 00:11:23,860 --> 00:11:25,860 We could go to Canal Street. 146 00:11:25,860 --> 00:11:28,660 - What, and then go back to yours? - Sure. 147 00:11:28,860 --> 00:11:32,060 - Mariner's Court, yeah? - Mm. 148 00:11:32,260 --> 00:11:35,060 l've been there. Must have made a big impression. 149 00:11:35,260 --> 00:11:37,460 Oh, right! 150 00:11:37,660 --> 00:11:40,060 Right, yeah. Course you have, yeah. 151 00:11:41,260 --> 00:11:43,260 Nice to see you again. 152 00:11:43,260 --> 00:11:48,060 Listen, what? Do you wanna go? Do you wanna, er... 153 00:11:48,060 --> 00:11:50,460 - Let's go and have a drink. - Forget it. 154 00:11:51,660 --> 00:11:55,060 - Let's go back to mine. - Just fuck off, OK? 155 00:11:56,260 --> 00:11:58,060 Come on, l bet l was good. 156 00:11:58,260 --> 00:12:02,060 l said fuck off. Now, what part of that don't you understand? 157 00:12:19,060 --> 00:12:21,060 Pathetic. 158 00:12:52,260 --> 00:12:54,260 Let's get a cab. 159 00:12:55,860 --> 00:12:58,260 (Vince) He's all bloody image. 160 00:12:58,260 --> 00:13:02,860 We were in Babylon once, off our heads, Alexander's going mental. 161 00:13:03,060 --> 00:13:06,460 So we ended up dancing on a podium, you know, like twats. 162 00:13:06,460 --> 00:13:08,860 We looked stupid, so what? 163 00:13:08,860 --> 00:13:13,060 But Stuart, he just walks away like we're dirt. 164 00:13:14,260 --> 00:13:18,860 - l got those brochures for Australia. - Oh, right. Yeah, great. 165 00:13:18,860 --> 00:13:20,860 Expensive. 166 00:13:21,060 --> 00:13:24,460 - l'll pay. - Yeah. Well, we'll see. 167 00:13:24,460 --> 00:13:29,260 And this bloke at Mardi Gras, right? Stuart's been out all weekend, 168 00:13:29,260 --> 00:13:31,460 he's had ketamine and God knows what. 169 00:13:31,460 --> 00:13:34,260 He sees this bloke, he says, ''l'm having him.'' 170 00:13:39,860 --> 00:13:41,860 l love you. 171 00:13:49,260 --> 00:13:51,260 Right, do you want sex? 172 00:13:52,260 --> 00:13:54,860 l suppose l owe you a favour. Come on. 173 00:13:57,860 --> 00:13:59,660 l didn't do it for a shag. 174 00:14:01,460 --> 00:14:03,460 Nathan, 175 00:14:03,660 --> 00:14:05,460 it's all l've got to offer. 176 00:14:05,660 --> 00:14:08,460 How many men's had sex in here? 177 00:14:10,460 --> 00:14:12,660 Twenty-seven...million. 178 00:14:15,260 --> 00:14:17,260 l was just on tap. 179 00:14:17,260 --> 00:14:19,460 You don't even like me. 180 00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:23,860 - You're not so bad. - Really? 181 00:14:24,060 --> 00:14:28,660 Well, let's just say you're not the twat l thought you were. 182 00:14:28,860 --> 00:14:31,060 ls that all? 183 00:14:32,060 --> 00:14:33,460 That's all. 184 00:14:34,660 --> 00:14:36,460 Yeah, well. One day. 185 00:14:39,860 --> 00:14:42,060 Oh, yeah. 186 00:14:43,260 --> 00:14:48,460 Ten years' time, l'll be pushing 40, you'll be 25. Jesus! 187 00:14:50,660 --> 00:14:52,460 l can wait. 188 00:14:55,860 --> 00:14:57,860 l'm off. 189 00:14:58,060 --> 00:15:00,460 l've got school. 190 00:15:02,460 --> 00:15:04,860 Have a coffee. 191 00:15:04,860 --> 00:15:07,660 - What for? - l don't know. 192 00:15:07,860 --> 00:15:11,260 What does anyone ever have coffee for? lt's just coffee. 193 00:15:11,460 --> 00:15:13,660 l'd better go. 194 00:15:14,660 --> 00:15:17,460 - We could watch a video. - Not porn. 195 00:15:18,860 --> 00:15:20,660 lt's not always porn. 196 00:15:25,460 --> 00:15:29,060 - Stay for a bit. - Do you want me to? 197 00:15:36,260 --> 00:15:40,060 - Do you want me to stay? - l don't mind. 198 00:15:40,260 --> 00:15:42,660 Do you really want me to stay? 199 00:15:44,660 --> 00:15:46,460 Yeah. 200 00:15:48,860 --> 00:15:50,660 Who'd have thought? 201 00:15:50,860 --> 00:15:53,660 Stuart Alan Jones, begging me to stay. 202 00:15:54,660 --> 00:15:58,660 lf you think that's begging, you'd better never find yourself homeless. 203 00:15:59,660 --> 00:16:02,060 & But when the morning comes 204 00:16:02,260 --> 00:16:04,260 & Don't say you love me 205 00:16:04,460 --> 00:16:07,460 & Don't say you need me 206 00:16:07,460 --> 00:16:09,660 & l really don't think that's fair 207 00:16:09,860 --> 00:16:12,860 & Boy, l'm not so dumb... & 208 00:16:39,860 --> 00:16:41,660 l'm gonna be late. 209 00:16:41,860 --> 00:16:44,860 Where's that folder, the blue folder? 210 00:16:45,060 --> 00:16:47,860 Shit. The traffic this time of day. 211 00:16:48,860 --> 00:16:51,060 Right. l'm off. 212 00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:53,660 You all right? You've got the keys. 213 00:16:53,660 --> 00:16:56,860 Careful with the door, it needs pulling. See you. 214 00:16:57,060 --> 00:17:01,060 - You don't have to say anything back. - Yeah. God, l'm late. 215 00:17:01,060 --> 00:17:04,860 The door needs pulling. l've said that, haven't l? Bye! 216 00:17:20,460 --> 00:17:21,860 (Mobile phone) 217 00:17:34,260 --> 00:17:36,860 - What? - Thought l'd better say thanks. 218 00:17:37,060 --> 00:17:38,460 For K-9. 219 00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:43,260 l mean, he's great 220 00:17:43,460 --> 00:17:47,460 and l know the circumstances were a bit sort of... 221 00:17:47,660 --> 00:17:51,260 'Well, he's great. Or it's great. Whatever.' 222 00:17:51,460 --> 00:17:54,260 He. l think Tom Baker says ''he''. 223 00:17:55,260 --> 00:17:58,060 So...thanks. 224 00:17:58,260 --> 00:18:00,660 Any time. 225 00:18:02,860 --> 00:18:04,660 Better go. 226 00:18:41,660 --> 00:18:43,860 (Rings) 227 00:18:44,860 --> 00:18:46,660 What are you doing for lunch? 228 00:18:49,460 --> 00:18:53,260 Rosalie won't say anything but l've still got to look at her. 229 00:18:53,260 --> 00:18:56,260 l've got to spend every day telling her what to do and... 230 00:18:58,860 --> 00:19:02,260 - How's Cameron? - He's great, yeah. 231 00:19:02,460 --> 00:19:05,060 Wants me to go on holiday. Melbourne. 232 00:19:05,260 --> 00:19:06,860 Sounds good. 233 00:19:07,060 --> 00:19:09,060 Poor sod. Give him six months, 234 00:19:09,060 --> 00:19:12,660 he'll be able to name all the Doctor Whos in order. 235 00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:15,660 William Hartnell, Patrick Troughton, Jon Pertwee, Tom Baker, 236 00:19:15,660 --> 00:19:17,860 Peter Davison, Colin Baker, Sylvester McCoy. 237 00:19:18,060 --> 00:19:19,260 What about Paul McGann? 238 00:19:19,460 --> 00:19:22,060 (Both) Paul McGann doesn't count. 239 00:19:27,260 --> 00:19:31,260 lt's all right, though. Me and Cameron. lt's OK. 240 00:19:31,460 --> 00:19:34,660 lt's a bit of a love job, actually. Says he loves me. 241 00:19:37,060 --> 00:19:39,860 How's things with you? How's Alfred? 242 00:19:46,660 --> 00:19:48,260 lt pisses me off, though. 243 00:19:48,260 --> 00:19:51,660 First one to say love, he's in charge, puts him in charge. 244 00:19:52,860 --> 00:19:55,260 l don't know. 245 00:19:55,460 --> 00:19:57,460 lt's all a bit grown-up. 246 00:20:00,060 --> 00:20:02,460 You're supposed to ask if l love him. 247 00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:06,060 You can't. You can't even respect him. 248 00:20:06,260 --> 00:20:08,860 He loves Vince Tyler so that makes him stupid. 249 00:20:10,460 --> 00:20:12,860 The moment he said it, it all just died. 250 00:20:12,860 --> 00:20:15,060 No. lt's nothing like that. 251 00:20:23,460 --> 00:20:25,460 Me, though? 252 00:20:25,660 --> 00:20:28,860 l can't be the best shag he's ever had. He's Australian. 253 00:20:30,260 --> 00:20:32,460 l don't even know if l'm a good kisser. 254 00:20:32,660 --> 00:20:35,060 How do you know if you're a good kisser? 255 00:20:35,060 --> 00:20:37,060 You just know. 256 00:20:38,460 --> 00:20:40,460 Fuck off. 257 00:20:41,660 --> 00:20:45,860 - lt's not as if l've ever done anything. - You've done nothing. 258 00:20:46,060 --> 00:20:48,260 You go to work, you go for a drink, 259 00:20:48,460 --> 00:20:50,460 you watch cheap science fiction. 260 00:20:50,660 --> 00:20:55,660 Small and tiny world. What's impressive about that? What is there to love? 261 00:20:57,460 --> 00:20:59,260 Yeah. 262 00:21:01,860 --> 00:21:04,260 lt was good enough for me. 263 00:21:14,260 --> 00:21:17,060 l'm late. l've gotta go. 264 00:21:17,260 --> 00:21:20,260 Tell him what you like. You're in charge, not him. 265 00:21:21,460 --> 00:21:23,460 Tell him, er... 266 00:21:23,460 --> 00:21:26,060 Tell him he's lucky. l'll see you around. 267 00:21:26,260 --> 00:21:29,060 - We could do this again. - Do you think? 268 00:21:29,060 --> 00:21:31,260 Just lunch. No harm in it. 269 00:21:33,060 --> 00:21:34,860 Nah. 270 00:21:35,060 --> 00:21:37,860 Sorry, Vince, but my world is huge. 271 00:21:49,060 --> 00:21:51,260 Do you think Hazel will let me stay? 272 00:21:52,460 --> 00:21:55,060 Not permanent, just tonight. 273 00:21:55,260 --> 00:21:59,060 Gary's got his mates round. lt's like a bomb's hit Chester Zoo. 274 00:21:59,060 --> 00:22:02,260 Police cars, broken legs, lesbians screaming, 275 00:22:02,260 --> 00:22:06,260 Lance shipped out the country - your mother had a front-row seat! 276 00:22:06,460 --> 00:22:09,460 - You never said. - l don't see you any more. 277 00:22:09,660 --> 00:22:13,060 No, you're Mr Grown-Up now, it's all dinner for two. 278 00:22:13,260 --> 00:22:17,260 Don't worry about us, we're still here, still having a laugh. 279 00:22:17,460 --> 00:22:21,860 Now, don't say that about Cameron, l think he's lovely. 280 00:22:22,060 --> 00:22:24,260 That's not fair, he's a very nice man! 281 00:22:24,460 --> 00:22:26,460 Hiya, l was just coming round. 282 00:22:26,460 --> 00:22:29,660 - You're on form! - When am l not? 283 00:22:29,860 --> 00:22:31,860 There you go. 284 00:22:31,860 --> 00:22:35,060 Don't look. By the pillar, it's Christian Hobbs. 285 00:22:35,260 --> 00:22:37,460 - Who's he with? - That's Cathy Mott. 286 00:22:37,660 --> 00:22:41,660 He's done all right. She's top of the list, Year 12. 287 00:22:41,660 --> 00:22:46,060 - What are they doing here, though? - He's out to impress. 288 00:22:46,060 --> 00:22:49,660 Canal Street, it's New York to Year 12. 289 00:22:49,860 --> 00:22:52,460 Like he's so cool. Tosser! 290 00:22:53,860 --> 00:22:56,260 (& Karaoke: Should l Stay Or Should l Go? ) 291 00:22:58,460 --> 00:23:01,460 l had to see Hazel, l owed her a tenner. 292 00:23:01,660 --> 00:23:03,460 l thought you'd go to ground. 293 00:23:03,660 --> 00:23:06,260 My fault. l always get a bit heavy. 294 00:23:09,060 --> 00:23:12,060 & And if l stay it will be double 295 00:23:13,060 --> 00:23:15,860 & So you gotta let me know... & 296 00:23:17,460 --> 00:23:21,260 He smiled at me! The bastard smiled at me! 297 00:23:22,260 --> 00:23:25,660 - Do you want to go? - What's the point of staying here? 298 00:23:29,860 --> 00:23:33,660 & And if l stay it will be double... & 299 00:23:33,860 --> 00:23:38,460 - Coming, then? - What, like l've been driven out? 300 00:23:38,460 --> 00:23:41,860 What's this place for, Donna? What's it for? 301 00:23:42,060 --> 00:23:46,860 So l'm stood in Battersea Power Station in nothing but me Tommy Hilfiger pants 302 00:23:46,860 --> 00:23:48,660 when he comes back in. 303 00:23:48,860 --> 00:23:51,460 Oh, blimey! lt's little Jimmy Osmond! 304 00:23:52,860 --> 00:23:56,660 Settle down, here's a lad wants a go. Come on, give him a chance. 305 00:23:56,860 --> 00:23:59,060 (& l Should Be So Lucky) 306 00:24:08,260 --> 00:24:10,260 Cos l just wanted to say... 307 00:24:14,660 --> 00:24:20,460 Cos that boy over there. Checked shirt, white T-shirt, with the blonde girl, him. 308 00:24:20,460 --> 00:24:23,860 l'm in school with him. His name is Christian Hobbs. 309 00:24:24,060 --> 00:24:26,860 And Christian Hobbs, do you know what he does? 310 00:24:26,860 --> 00:24:31,460 He finds a boy, and if that boy's a bit quiet, if he's a bit different, 311 00:24:31,660 --> 00:24:35,660 Christian Hobbs kicks his head in and he calls him queer. 312 00:24:35,860 --> 00:24:40,260 That boy there. He beats us up cos we're queer. 313 00:24:41,460 --> 00:24:43,860 Plenty more l could have said, Christian. 314 00:24:43,860 --> 00:24:46,060 And that's a favour. 315 00:24:46,060 --> 00:24:49,860 Oi, sonny Jim, that's your cue. Now, fuck off out. 316 00:24:50,060 --> 00:24:51,860 Piss off. 317 00:24:52,060 --> 00:24:56,060 l think that's what they call the public service announcement! 318 00:24:56,260 --> 00:24:58,260 We've had a party! 319 00:24:58,460 --> 00:25:02,060 He's here! He's queer! l'm buyin' him a beer! 320 00:25:02,060 --> 00:25:05,660 Hazel, l was thinking, it's been great and l hope you don't mind 321 00:25:05,860 --> 00:25:08,060 but l think l might move back home. 322 00:25:08,060 --> 00:25:10,260 Bugger it, that's the rent money gone! 323 00:25:10,460 --> 00:25:13,860 Ooh, look at me, l'm filling up, l'm moist. Can l have his room? 324 00:25:14,060 --> 00:25:16,060 You're dancing, you are! 325 00:25:18,460 --> 00:25:20,860 (& Ultra Nate: Found A Cure) 326 00:25:21,060 --> 00:25:23,460 & Na-na-na-na, na na na... & 327 00:25:24,260 --> 00:25:26,460 Shake a leg, Bernie, let's show 'em! 328 00:25:28,460 --> 00:25:32,060 & Feels like l'm going crazy & Na-na-na-na 329 00:25:32,060 --> 00:25:35,860 & Feels like l'm going insane & Na-na-na-na 330 00:25:39,260 --> 00:25:40,660 & Na-na-na-na... & 331 00:25:40,860 --> 00:25:43,860 See those two? That's us in 40 years! 332 00:25:44,060 --> 00:25:46,460 That's me with the moustache! 333 00:25:46,660 --> 00:25:49,260 & Feels like l'm going insane... & 334 00:25:50,660 --> 00:25:52,660 Fifteen. 335 00:25:52,660 --> 00:25:54,860 (Both) Yeah. 336 00:25:55,060 --> 00:25:56,660 Bastard. 337 00:25:56,860 --> 00:26:00,860 & Feels like l'm going crazy & Na-na-na-na 338 00:26:01,060 --> 00:26:04,660 & Feels like l'm going insane & Na-na-na-na... & 339 00:26:09,060 --> 00:26:11,860 Marcie, can you take that to wages? 340 00:26:12,060 --> 00:26:15,660 - What did your last slave die of? - A good beating. 341 00:26:15,660 --> 00:26:18,660 lt's for Simon Carter. Do you know him? 342 00:26:18,860 --> 00:26:21,260 Black hair, sort of Fox Mulder look. 343 00:26:21,460 --> 00:26:23,860 He's got the best arse in this shop. 344 00:26:25,060 --> 00:26:28,660 Will you put in a good word for me? l've always fancied him. 345 00:26:28,660 --> 00:26:30,660 Run along. 346 00:26:48,660 --> 00:26:52,260 - Someone had to get the flags out! - That's France, though. 347 00:26:52,460 --> 00:26:55,860 lt's all we had. lt came with the cheese. 348 00:26:55,860 --> 00:26:57,460 See you later. 349 00:26:57,660 --> 00:27:01,660 Maybe tomorrow. You've seen enough of him, it's my turn. 350 00:27:03,260 --> 00:27:06,260 Donna! You left that bloody door open! 351 00:27:12,460 --> 00:27:15,260 l'm still gonna go out, to the Village. 352 00:27:15,460 --> 00:27:17,660 Not on school nights you're not. 353 00:27:20,260 --> 00:27:23,460 And l'm not gonna change. You know that, don't you? 354 00:27:23,460 --> 00:27:26,660 Cos it isn't a phase. l'm not gonna grow out of it. 355 00:27:28,860 --> 00:27:31,060 l'm gonna be gay forever. 356 00:27:32,660 --> 00:27:36,660 You've made your mind up. lt's obvious there's no stopping you. 357 00:27:39,860 --> 00:27:43,660 lt's Helen l'm worried about. She's ten years old. 358 00:27:43,860 --> 00:27:47,660 She's a child. l don't want her head filled with notions. 359 00:27:50,460 --> 00:27:52,260 Like what? 360 00:27:54,860 --> 00:27:56,860 As far as Helen's concerned, 361 00:27:57,060 --> 00:27:58,860 the anus is for shit. 362 00:28:02,060 --> 00:28:04,060 Got that? 363 00:28:08,660 --> 00:28:11,860 Knock, knock. Your sister's been saying... 364 00:28:30,660 --> 00:28:32,660 No. She's not in her room. 365 00:28:42,660 --> 00:28:44,460 Me bloody wallet's gone. 366 00:28:44,660 --> 00:28:47,260 - Will that get us to London? - Should do. 367 00:28:55,060 --> 00:28:57,460 Are you coming? 368 00:28:57,460 --> 00:29:00,060 This had better be good. 369 00:29:02,260 --> 00:29:04,260 (Nathan) Get in. 370 00:29:08,860 --> 00:29:12,060 & Deeper love, l've got a deeper love 371 00:29:12,660 --> 00:29:15,860 & Deeper love, l've got a deeper love 372 00:29:16,460 --> 00:29:19,260 & Deeper love, l've got a deeper love 373 00:29:19,860 --> 00:29:23,060 & Deeper love, l've got a deeper love... & 374 00:29:24,660 --> 00:29:27,060 Hello, sugarface, you all right? 375 00:29:27,260 --> 00:29:30,060 My world's so fucking huge! 376 00:29:32,060 --> 00:29:36,060 Yeah. l know l'm late but l had to buy them a drink at work. 377 00:29:36,060 --> 00:29:38,860 - (Cameron) 'Never mind them.' - (Door creaks) 378 00:29:39,060 --> 00:29:41,660 Christ! You heard the door on this? 379 00:29:41,660 --> 00:29:45,060 l'll get it fixed. Get a move on or we'll lose the table. 380 00:29:45,260 --> 00:29:47,060 - (Creaking) - Listen to that. 381 00:29:47,260 --> 00:29:50,060 'l know. Just leave it, just hurry up.' 382 00:29:50,060 --> 00:29:52,260 l'll get Bernie to fix it. 383 00:29:52,260 --> 00:29:55,660 'l wouldn't trust Bernie. l'll take it to the garage.' 384 00:29:55,660 --> 00:29:58,860 - l'll do it. - Like you'll fix the door in your flat? 385 00:30:00,860 --> 00:30:02,660 l will. 386 00:30:02,660 --> 00:30:08,260 'lt's like waiting for a kid to tidy his room. l paid for the thing, l'll take charge.' 387 00:30:09,860 --> 00:30:12,460 Vince? Are you there? 388 00:30:13,860 --> 00:30:15,860 'Vince? Are you still there?' 389 00:30:17,660 --> 00:30:20,060 How many Doctor Whos can you name? 390 00:30:20,060 --> 00:30:21,660 'What do you mean?' 391 00:30:21,860 --> 00:30:24,660 All the actors who played Doctor Who. Name them. 392 00:30:24,860 --> 00:30:28,060 - 'l don't know.' - Just try. 393 00:30:28,060 --> 00:30:32,060 'Well... Jon Pertwee, Tom Baker, um...' 394 00:30:32,060 --> 00:30:34,660 - ls that it? - 'What does it matter?' 395 00:30:34,860 --> 00:30:36,660 Any more? 396 00:30:36,860 --> 00:30:40,260 - 'Er, the bloke with white hair.' - William Hartnell. 397 00:30:40,460 --> 00:30:42,260 Any more? 398 00:30:42,460 --> 00:30:45,060 'The vet. What the hell does it matter? 399 00:30:47,060 --> 00:30:49,460 'Vince?' 400 00:30:49,460 --> 00:30:52,860 Sorry? What? lt's breaking up. 401 00:30:53,060 --> 00:30:55,460 We're breaking up. Sorry. 402 00:31:10,460 --> 00:31:13,060 & Santa Maria 403 00:31:13,060 --> 00:31:15,060 & Rhyme to the rhythm, come on feel the rhythm 404 00:31:15,060 --> 00:31:17,660 & lt's a rhythm, a rhyme that rocks the whole time 405 00:31:17,660 --> 00:31:21,060 & Santa Maria 406 00:31:25,460 --> 00:31:28,660 & And l only want to be with you, baby 407 00:31:28,860 --> 00:31:33,460 & Yes, you know it's gonna be heaven here with me... & 408 00:31:34,460 --> 00:31:36,660 Taxi! Taxi! 409 00:31:38,060 --> 00:31:40,860 & Santa Maria 410 00:31:40,860 --> 00:31:42,860 & Rhyme to the rhythm, come on feel the rhythm 411 00:31:43,060 --> 00:31:46,660 & lt's a rhythm, a rhyme that rocks the whole time... & 412 00:31:48,260 --> 00:31:50,060 Taxi! 413 00:31:53,060 --> 00:31:55,260 - Big lssue? - Yes, it is. 414 00:32:09,660 --> 00:32:12,060 Unrequited love, it's fantastic 415 00:32:12,060 --> 00:32:16,660 cos it never has to change, it never has to grow up and it never has to die! 416 00:32:16,860 --> 00:32:19,460 & Santa Maria 417 00:32:19,460 --> 00:32:21,260 & Rhyme to the rhythm, come on feel the rhythm 418 00:32:21,260 --> 00:32:23,660 & lt's a rhythm, a rhyme that rocks the whole time... & 419 00:32:26,460 --> 00:32:27,660 Taxi! 420 00:32:27,860 --> 00:32:30,060 (& The Weather Girls: lt's Raining Men) 421 00:32:44,260 --> 00:32:46,260 (lnaudible) 422 00:32:53,060 --> 00:32:55,460 & Humidity is rising 423 00:32:56,460 --> 00:32:59,860 & Barometer's getting low 424 00:32:59,860 --> 00:33:03,860 & According to all sources 425 00:33:04,060 --> 00:33:06,660 & The street's the place to go 426 00:33:06,860 --> 00:33:10,660 & Cos tonight for the first time 427 00:33:10,660 --> 00:33:13,460 & Just about half past ten 428 00:33:13,660 --> 00:33:17,660 & For the first time in history 429 00:33:17,660 --> 00:33:21,260 & lt's gonna start raining men 430 00:33:22,060 --> 00:33:24,260 & lt's raining men 431 00:33:24,460 --> 00:33:27,660 & Hallelujah! lt's raining men 432 00:33:27,660 --> 00:33:29,660 & Amen 433 00:33:29,860 --> 00:33:33,860 & l'm gonna go out, l'm gonna let myself get 434 00:33:33,860 --> 00:33:37,860 & Absolutely soaking wet 435 00:33:38,060 --> 00:33:40,260 & lt's raining men 436 00:33:40,460 --> 00:33:42,860 & Hallelujah! lt's raining men 437 00:33:44,060 --> 00:33:46,260 & Every specimen 438 00:33:46,460 --> 00:33:49,860 & Tall, blond, dark and lean 439 00:33:50,060 --> 00:33:54,260 & Rough and tough and strong and mean 440 00:33:55,260 --> 00:33:58,860 & God bless Mother Nature 441 00:33:58,860 --> 00:34:02,460 & She's a single woman too 442 00:34:02,660 --> 00:34:05,260 & She took over heaven... &31786

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