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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,102 --> 00:00:04,103 [] 2 00:00:51,585 --> 00:00:53,552 - What have you got, George? 3 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:56,355 - Well, I would have had a straight 4 00:00:56,524 --> 00:01:00,992 if Chester had dealt me a 6. 5 00:01:01,162 --> 00:01:04,329 And an 8 and 9. 6 00:01:04,498 --> 00:01:09,101 The way this hand stands now, I've got garbage. 7 00:01:10,504 --> 00:01:11,537 - Two pair. 8 00:01:11,705 --> 00:01:14,273 Fours over jacks. 9 00:01:14,442 --> 00:01:15,840 - Sorry. Three deuces. 10 00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:18,777 - Keep your pants on, Dick. 11 00:01:20,448 --> 00:01:22,047 Read 'em and weep, boys. 12 00:01:22,216 --> 00:01:23,615 Four lovely ladies. 13 00:01:23,784 --> 00:01:25,617 Come to papa. 14 00:01:26,853 --> 00:01:29,188 - Jim, you don't have to act so all-fired cocky 15 00:01:29,356 --> 00:01:30,655 just because you won a few hands. 16 00:01:30,824 --> 00:01:33,158 - A few? I'm creamin' you guys! 17 00:01:37,664 --> 00:01:39,098 - Oh gumdrop! 18 00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:41,066 - Hi, Michael. How are things at the shoe store? 19 00:01:41,235 --> 00:01:42,101 - Joanna, do you know what it's like 20 00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:43,135 to spend 60 hours a week 21 00:01:44,105 --> 00:01:45,036 squatting on a stool within sniffing distance 22 00:01:45,206 --> 00:01:46,405 of strange peoples' feet? 23 00:01:48,209 --> 00:01:49,508 - Can't say that I do. 24 00:01:52,379 --> 00:01:55,280 - Ooooh, again you remembered! 25 00:01:55,449 --> 00:01:56,448 - Well, natch. 26 00:01:56,617 --> 00:01:57,682 Any suitor worth his salt 27 00:01:57,851 --> 00:02:00,919 knows that Cupcake Day comes but once a year. 28 00:02:01,122 --> 00:02:04,089 - I don't believe I've heard of Cupcake Day. 29 00:02:04,258 --> 00:02:05,657 - Michael created it for me two years ago 30 00:02:05,826 --> 00:02:07,092 to help fill that long void 31 00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:08,427 between Valentine's Day and Easter 32 00:02:08,596 --> 00:02:10,295 when I didn't get any gifts. 33 00:02:12,833 --> 00:02:14,266 - I wish I'd known. 34 00:02:14,435 --> 00:02:17,503 I haven't even begun my Cupcake Day shopping. 35 00:02:17,671 --> 00:02:19,971 - [GIGGLES] Don't worry about it. 36 00:02:20,141 --> 00:02:21,673 There's a three-day grace period. 37 00:02:23,511 --> 00:02:25,444 - Since I'm in this minimal monetary mode, 38 00:02:25,613 --> 00:02:27,279 instead of the traditional diamond trinket, 39 00:02:27,448 --> 00:02:31,283 I--I opted for something a bit more...symbolic. 40 00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:34,386 - It's a cupcake. 41 00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:39,090 - Maybe you're not picking up on the symbolism. 42 00:02:39,260 --> 00:02:40,592 - I get it, Michael, it's Cupcake Day 43 00:02:40,761 --> 00:02:43,262 and you're giving me a stupid cupcake. 44 00:02:43,430 --> 00:02:46,198 - Stephanie, Michael has been going through some hard times. 45 00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:48,300 - Well, how am I supposed to get in the holiday spirit 46 00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:49,635 when you give me something like this, 47 00:02:49,803 --> 00:02:51,836 on the second holiest day of the year? 48 00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:55,507 - I'm sorry, Stephums. 49 00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:58,310 - So this is as good as it gets? 50 00:02:58,479 --> 00:03:00,479 I guess this means no dinner either. 51 00:03:00,648 --> 00:03:03,582 - Well, pshaw! 52 00:03:03,750 --> 00:03:05,284 That'll be the icing on the cupcake. 53 00:03:05,452 --> 00:03:09,621 Tonight we dine at... Maison Hubert. 54 00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:12,057 - That's our restaurant! 55 00:03:12,226 --> 00:03:15,494 Michael, you're such a scamp on this holiday! 56 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:18,630 - George? 57 00:03:18,799 --> 00:03:20,799 - I'll stay. 58 00:03:20,967 --> 00:03:22,067 On second thought... 59 00:03:22,236 --> 00:03:23,535 four. 60 00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:28,507 - Did I drop a card? 61 00:03:28,676 --> 00:03:30,242 [GROANS] So I did. 62 00:03:30,411 --> 00:03:32,110 - Hey, I saw that. 63 00:03:32,279 --> 00:03:33,679 You pulled that card out of your sock! 64 00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:35,647 - You're crazy, Jim. 65 00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,649 A card fell on the floor and I merely retrieved it. 66 00:03:37,818 --> 00:03:39,685 - I know a cheater when I see one. 67 00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:42,487 There's sock fuzz all over the card... 68 00:03:42,656 --> 00:03:44,523 And look, it's an ace. 69 00:03:45,826 --> 00:03:47,526 He's nothing but a common criminal. 70 00:03:47,695 --> 00:03:48,760 - Careful. 71 00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:51,730 Jim, I wouldn't call the mayor a criminal. 72 00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:54,866 - Well, I knew he took staples and rubber bands home from work, 73 00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:57,202 but I never thought he'd cheat at cards. 74 00:03:57,371 --> 00:03:59,705 - So now I'm a cheater and a petty thief. 75 00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:01,873 - Well, at least you're man enough to admit it. 76 00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:04,643 - Guys! 77 00:04:04,811 --> 00:04:07,613 - Jim Dixon, you're pushing me to the breaking point. 78 00:04:07,781 --> 00:04:10,282 - Chester Wanamaker, you're an immoral hound! 79 00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:11,717 - Oh, merciful heavens, 80 00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:14,786 forgive me for what I'm about to do. 81 00:04:14,988 --> 00:04:16,255 - Ow! 82 00:04:19,326 --> 00:04:20,825 - Don't hit. I'm a bleeder! 83 00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:29,368 - Good evening, Hubert. 84 00:04:29,536 --> 00:04:31,403 - Monsieur Harris! 85 00:04:33,641 --> 00:04:35,807 Mademoiselle Vanderkellen. 86 00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:37,676 So nice to have you back where you belong 87 00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:39,311 here at Maison Hubert. 88 00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:40,712 - Merci, Hubert. 89 00:04:40,881 --> 00:04:43,848 - I'm afraid we, uh, we don't have a reservation. 90 00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:47,352 - Never a problem for Mr. Harris. 91 00:04:47,554 --> 00:04:49,755 - I'm so glad. It's a special day for me. 92 00:04:49,923 --> 00:04:52,991 - Sacre Bleu! Can it be Cupcake Day already? 93 00:04:55,496 --> 00:04:56,662 - Where does the time go? 94 00:04:56,830 --> 00:05:00,599 - I haven't even begun shopping for your Cupcake Day gift. 95 00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:01,700 - There's still time. 96 00:05:01,868 --> 00:05:05,570 - Thank God for that three-day grace period! 97 00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:07,806 Follow me. 98 00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:09,608 Up, up, up, up! 99 00:05:09,777 --> 00:05:10,642 Back to the bar. 100 00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,877 - But it's our 25th anniversary! 101 00:05:14,281 --> 00:05:15,614 - Michel, Richard! 102 00:05:26,627 --> 00:05:28,393 Some people! 103 00:05:37,604 --> 00:05:39,270 - Oh, no! 104 00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:42,341 What are Rollo and Fiona doing in Vermont? 105 00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:43,642 - Who? 106 00:05:43,811 --> 00:05:44,743 - The Wallingfords. 107 00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:47,379 Our families have hated each other for years, 108 00:05:47,548 --> 00:05:49,414 and they have this icky son Roscoe 109 00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:52,451 who was always trying to touch me at cotillions. 110 00:05:52,619 --> 00:05:54,219 - Steph, are you forgetting the bylaws? 111 00:05:54,421 --> 00:05:57,356 Discussing reality on Cupcake Day is forbidden. 112 00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:59,825 - [CHUCKLES] Of course! 113 00:05:59,993 --> 00:06:02,494 Well, shall we ask Henri to bring us 114 00:06:02,663 --> 00:06:04,696 our traditional bottle of Dom Perignon? 115 00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:05,831 - Uh, bully bottle of bubbly, 116 00:06:05,999 --> 00:06:08,367 but why not sample something more...more local. 117 00:06:10,070 --> 00:06:13,438 - Vermont Blush? 118 00:06:13,607 --> 00:06:15,640 - Truth be known, Cuppers, this current cash crunch of mine... 119 00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:17,242 - Say no more. 120 00:06:17,411 --> 00:06:20,612 Actually this Vermont Blush sounds rather tasty, 121 00:06:20,781 --> 00:06:25,083 and you know how much I love a nice...cranberry wine. 122 00:06:26,754 --> 00:06:27,853 - I can see what you're doing. 123 00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:30,321 A man with half a brain can tell you don't mean that, 124 00:06:30,491 --> 00:06:32,691 and I happen to be one of those men. 125 00:06:34,495 --> 00:06:36,661 So I'm shy a few shekels. 126 00:06:36,830 --> 00:06:39,297 So what? It's Cupcake Day, a time of giving. 127 00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:40,565 - And getting. 128 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:41,733 - Henri. 129 00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:42,768 - Oui, Monsieur Harris. 130 00:06:43,771 --> 00:06:45,270 - Bring us your finest bottle of Dom Perignon. 131 00:06:45,439 --> 00:06:46,271 - Bon. 132 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:49,007 - Tonight, we live. 133 00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:52,411 - Gustav really outdid himself tonight. 134 00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:55,647 - It takes a culinary master to mold a 5-pound lobster 135 00:06:55,816 --> 00:06:57,081 into the shape of a cupcake. 136 00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:00,385 - Excuse me, monsieur, but there seems to be some 137 00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:03,321 petit problem with your credit card. 138 00:07:03,490 --> 00:07:05,657 - Not platinum enough for you? [CHUCKLES] 139 00:07:05,826 --> 00:07:08,527 - This is no matter for chuckling. 140 00:07:08,695 --> 00:07:09,895 We called the company for credit approval, 141 00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:11,963 and you are flatly denied. 142 00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:13,932 - That can't be! 143 00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,634 - We've been asked to destroy your card. 144 00:07:15,803 --> 00:07:17,502 - You can't do that to me! It's the only card I have left. 145 00:07:17,671 --> 00:07:19,704 - Henri has kindly agreed to do the honor. 146 00:07:22,810 --> 00:07:23,842 [GASP] 147 00:07:36,523 --> 00:07:39,925 - The bill must be paid in cash. 148 00:07:40,093 --> 00:07:41,460 - $248? 149 00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:42,928 - Plus gratuity. 150 00:07:43,096 --> 00:07:45,497 - But I don't have that kind of cash! 151 00:07:45,666 --> 00:07:46,531 - I warn you, monsieur, 152 00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:48,567 do not try to run out on the tab. 153 00:07:48,735 --> 00:07:51,837 Michel and Richard are no stranger to kickboxing. 154 00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:56,708 - Help me, Steph. Cough up some cold cash. 155 00:07:56,877 --> 00:07:59,344 - You know I don't carry money on Cupcake Day. 156 00:07:59,513 --> 00:08:01,680 - We've got to change these bylaws! 157 00:08:01,849 --> 00:08:03,548 - And I can't wash dishes in this dress. 158 00:08:03,717 --> 00:08:05,617 It's a Gini Labrazizzi. 159 00:08:05,786 --> 00:08:08,854 - There's only one thing left to do...beg! 160 00:08:09,055 --> 00:08:10,355 - Who? 161 00:08:10,524 --> 00:08:11,523 - Them. 162 00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:16,361 - I can't beg the Wallingfords for money. 163 00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:18,329 - Maybe we could sell them your dress! 164 00:08:18,499 --> 00:08:20,765 [SOBS] 165 00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:24,035 - [SIGHS] All right. I'll grovel. 166 00:08:24,204 --> 00:08:25,036 - Oh, thank you, Steph. 167 00:08:25,973 --> 00:08:27,472 This time you'll be canonized for sure! 168 00:08:32,479 --> 00:08:33,645 - Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Wallingford. 169 00:08:33,814 --> 00:08:35,413 Remember me, Stephanie Vanderkellen? 170 00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:38,316 - Of course, dear. It's so good to see you. 171 00:08:38,485 --> 00:08:39,450 - Is this your young man? 172 00:08:39,620 --> 00:08:41,653 - Michael Harris. 173 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:42,787 What brings you to Vermont? 174 00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:44,723 I'll bet you $300 it's not the skiing. 175 00:08:44,892 --> 00:08:47,893 [CHUCKLES] 176 00:08:49,796 --> 00:08:50,962 - We're up visiting Roscoe. 177 00:08:51,131 --> 00:08:53,865 He's studying at Bennington College. 178 00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:56,968 - Still? Isn't he like 38? 179 00:08:58,271 --> 00:09:00,071 - The lad can't settle on a major. 180 00:09:02,643 --> 00:09:06,377 - [GIGGLES] Anyway, the silliest thing just happened to Michael. 181 00:09:06,547 --> 00:09:07,412 - Oh, yes. 182 00:09:07,581 --> 00:09:10,582 We did notice the little unpleasantness 183 00:09:10,751 --> 00:09:12,517 with the credit card. 184 00:09:12,686 --> 00:09:14,485 - See, I, uh, left my other wallet, 185 00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:16,354 the one with the big roll of money in it, 186 00:09:16,523 --> 00:09:18,122 in my other Ferrari. 187 00:09:18,291 --> 00:09:20,659 - And you'd like us to take care of your... 188 00:09:20,827 --> 00:09:23,662 - Thanks! You're a lifesaver. 189 00:09:23,830 --> 00:09:26,731 - I can't help you. 190 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:28,567 - Please, Mr. Wallingford. 191 00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,436 Don't make me beg. I'm not good at it. 192 00:09:31,605 --> 00:09:33,738 - I think you're marvelous at it, dear. 193 00:09:35,609 --> 00:09:38,076 Pay the bill, Rollo. 194 00:09:38,244 --> 00:09:39,611 Imagine the fun we'll have 195 00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:41,980 telling anyone who'll listen at the club 196 00:09:42,148 --> 00:09:45,717 that a Vanderkellen begged a Wallingford for money. 197 00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:50,188 - I'll...I'll get your coat. 198 00:09:52,726 --> 00:09:54,459 - Thank you. 199 00:09:54,628 --> 00:09:59,197 - Stephanie...I'm not quite sold on this Michael of yours. 200 00:09:59,365 --> 00:10:02,433 You know, our Roscoe has always been rather smitten with you. 201 00:10:02,603 --> 00:10:03,868 - Oh-h-h-h. 202 00:10:04,037 --> 00:10:04,903 - If it's any inducement, 203 00:10:05,072 --> 00:10:06,805 he's had that lazy eye corrected. 204 00:10:11,244 --> 00:10:12,877 - Well, [SIGHS] 205 00:10:13,046 --> 00:10:15,647 I don't know if Roscoe and I are... 206 00:10:15,816 --> 00:10:20,318 - Libby Hartcourt says you clean toilets at some motel. 207 00:10:22,723 --> 00:10:24,823 - It's not a motel. 208 00:10:24,992 --> 00:10:27,058 It's an inn... and I don't care 209 00:10:27,227 --> 00:10:28,827 if Roscoe did get his eyes fixed. 210 00:10:28,996 --> 00:10:30,261 He'll always have that hump! 211 00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:37,201 [SOBS] I had the worst Cupcake Day ever! 212 00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:39,203 - Another delightful meal. Au revoir, Hubert. 213 00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:42,907 - It is not au revoir. It is goodbye, deadbeater. 214 00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:53,217 - Well, it was bound to happen. 215 00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:54,285 - What's--what's that, George? 216 00:10:55,288 --> 00:10:57,722 - Jim and Chester have officially broken up. 217 00:10:57,924 --> 00:11:00,525 - Oh, no! That's just terrible. 218 00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:03,995 Their friendship was practically legendary around here. 219 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:07,065 - Jim and Chester are going around telling everybody in town 220 00:11:07,233 --> 00:11:10,201 that if Dick hadn't forced them to play cards last night, 221 00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:13,805 they never would have had that awful squabble. 222 00:11:13,974 --> 00:11:16,641 - I never forced anybody to do anything. 223 00:11:16,810 --> 00:11:18,442 - That's not how the town sees it. 224 00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:21,245 - George, you were there. 225 00:11:21,414 --> 00:11:23,214 Y-You know I had nothing to do with it. 226 00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:24,783 - I'd like to believe you, Dick, 227 00:11:24,951 --> 00:11:28,119 but what would the town gain by lying? 228 00:11:30,057 --> 00:11:31,255 Think about that. 229 00:11:35,062 --> 00:11:35,894 - Good morning, Michael. 230 00:11:36,830 --> 00:11:36,895 - Let's pass with the pleasantries, JoJo. 231 00:11:37,731 --> 00:11:38,997 I'm pleading for my love life here. 232 00:11:39,166 --> 00:11:40,999 - Oh, muffin. - Drop dead! 233 00:11:44,370 --> 00:11:46,637 - She's a little irked that I made her beg for money 234 00:11:46,807 --> 00:11:48,306 in a restaurant. 235 00:11:48,474 --> 00:11:50,842 I come bearing an armload of gifts. 236 00:11:54,815 --> 00:11:57,682 - Well, I guess I could entertain 237 00:11:57,851 --> 00:11:58,950 the idea of accepting it. 238 00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:01,920 After all, I was publicly humiliated. 239 00:12:04,324 --> 00:12:07,826 - What happened last night will never happen again. 240 00:12:07,994 --> 00:12:09,728 They're letting me work double shifts at the shoe store, 241 00:12:09,896 --> 00:12:11,162 and for extra money, the owner said he'd train me 242 00:12:11,331 --> 00:12:12,496 to become a cobbler. 243 00:12:16,036 --> 00:12:17,235 - A cobbler? 244 00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:19,303 - It's a lost art. 245 00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:20,638 - You know, when you think of it, 246 00:12:20,807 --> 00:12:23,041 where are the young cobblers coming from? 247 00:12:24,144 --> 00:12:26,310 - Trust me, Steph, I'm going to make things better for us. 248 00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:28,179 I swear it! 249 00:12:28,348 --> 00:12:30,615 - Oh, Michael! 250 00:12:30,784 --> 00:12:32,217 What am I going to do with you? 251 00:12:32,385 --> 00:12:36,154 - [CHUCKLES] Well now, run upstairs and try that on. 252 00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:38,857 [CHUCKLES] 253 00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:46,164 Dick, I need 20 grand fast. 254 00:12:46,332 --> 00:12:47,766 - What? - Okay, 18. 255 00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:49,167 - Michael, we don't have that kind of money! 256 00:12:49,335 --> 00:12:50,935 - [SHOUTING] Don't plead poverty with me, pal. 257 00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:52,036 I'm late on my mortgage. 258 00:12:52,205 --> 00:12:53,972 I've missed my last two Turbo-Z payments. 259 00:12:54,141 --> 00:12:55,206 I've got the repo man rapping at my door 260 00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:57,175 and I just wrote a bum check to buy that gift. 261 00:12:57,343 --> 00:12:58,376 I'm drowning. 262 00:12:58,544 --> 00:13:01,479 [SOBS] 263 00:13:03,483 --> 00:13:05,650 - Michael, Michael, we'd like to help you. 264 00:13:05,819 --> 00:13:07,652 - You see, our money is tied up in the inn. 265 00:13:07,821 --> 00:13:09,220 - Then sell it! 266 00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:12,323 - We're not going to sell the inn 267 00:13:12,492 --> 00:13:14,225 to support your extravagant lifestyle. 268 00:13:14,394 --> 00:13:16,261 - And here I was thinking I could count on you 269 00:13:16,429 --> 00:13:18,263 when things got tough! 270 00:13:18,431 --> 00:13:20,165 I guess you don't know the true meaning of friendship. 271 00:13:20,333 --> 00:13:21,900 [YELLING] You should look it up sometime. 272 00:13:22,068 --> 00:13:25,069 [SOBS] 273 00:13:30,376 --> 00:13:33,011 - Michael, how did you know that I love black mink. 274 00:13:33,180 --> 00:13:34,279 You shouldn't have! 275 00:13:34,447 --> 00:13:36,447 [CHUCKLES] 276 00:13:46,559 --> 00:13:47,959 - Now before I total this up, 277 00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:50,795 you'll want some heel savers and some shoe trees 278 00:13:50,964 --> 00:13:53,097 so those wing tips don't lose their shape. 279 00:13:53,266 --> 00:13:54,098 - I don't think I need those. 280 00:13:55,302 --> 00:13:55,934 - [YELLING] Hey, I'm working on a commission here, buddy. 281 00:13:56,870 --> 00:13:57,836 You're taking food out of my baby's mouth! 282 00:13:58,004 --> 00:13:59,804 - Okay, okay. 283 00:13:59,973 --> 00:14:01,272 - That'll be 74 even. 284 00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:07,645 And next time you come back, be sure to ask for Michael. 285 00:14:07,814 --> 00:14:09,948 - You couldn't pay me to come back. 286 00:14:11,484 --> 00:14:13,651 - You don't have to shove our shoes 287 00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:15,086 down the customer's throat. 288 00:14:15,255 --> 00:14:18,356 They sell themselves due to their superb workmanship 289 00:14:18,558 --> 00:14:21,392 and low, low, discount prices. 290 00:14:21,561 --> 00:14:24,395 We have a 2-1/2-year tradition to uphold, 291 00:14:24,564 --> 00:14:27,232 and your attitude is tarnishing the good name 292 00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:29,300 of Circus of Shoes. 293 00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:32,503 - I'll remember that, Mr. Rusnak. 294 00:14:35,608 --> 00:14:37,508 - Stan, we have a customer. 295 00:14:40,180 --> 00:14:42,113 - Wait on her and you're a dead man, Stan. 296 00:14:43,649 --> 00:14:45,183 How may I help you? 297 00:14:45,352 --> 00:14:47,151 - Chuck! - Dr. Kaiser. 298 00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:49,387 - In our therapy sessions, you never mentioned 299 00:14:49,555 --> 00:14:51,155 you worked in a shoe store. 300 00:14:52,325 --> 00:14:55,193 - Michael, I asked Stan to wait on this customer. 301 00:14:55,362 --> 00:14:58,529 - I know, but she's... she's my mother. 302 00:15:04,037 --> 00:15:04,869 Sorry. 303 00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:07,705 He only lets me wait on relatives. 304 00:15:07,874 --> 00:15:10,875 - I see, but he called you Michael. 305 00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:11,943 Your name is Chuck. 306 00:15:12,112 --> 00:15:14,379 - Oh, right. Actually, it's Michael Chuck. 307 00:15:15,382 --> 00:15:17,882 Some call me Michael. Some call me Chuck. 308 00:15:18,051 --> 00:15:20,051 Some call me Michael Chuck. 309 00:15:20,220 --> 00:15:21,819 - Well, Michael Chuck. 310 00:15:21,988 --> 00:15:22,954 - Yes. 311 00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:25,189 - Maybe you could show me this in a 6-1/2 C. 312 00:15:25,392 --> 00:15:26,690 - Excellent choice. 313 00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:41,806 - Are you all right? You seem a bit tense. 314 00:15:41,975 --> 00:15:44,108 - Confidentially, Dr. Kaiser, 315 00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:47,245 I've had this strain on my brain for some time. 316 00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:48,512 [CHUCKLES] 317 00:15:48,681 --> 00:15:50,315 You know my sweetie, Stephie. 318 00:15:50,483 --> 00:15:53,117 - In sessions, she said her name was Dawn. 319 00:15:53,286 --> 00:15:55,386 - Well, right. Actually it's Stephie Dawn. 320 00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:58,256 Some...some call her Stephie. Some call her... 321 00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,191 - Oh, I think I see where you're going with this, 322 00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:01,426 Michael Chuck. 323 00:16:03,296 --> 00:16:07,332 So you and Stephie Dawn are having more problems? 324 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:10,801 - Dr. Kaiser, I'm a worthless human being. 325 00:16:10,971 --> 00:16:12,437 I lost my high-profile job, 326 00:16:12,605 --> 00:16:15,306 and now I spend quantity time looking at other peoples' toes. 327 00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,508 Yours are cute though. 328 00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:19,344 - Thank you. - I've got no credit. 329 00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:22,347 My friends won't lend me a piddling 20 grand! 330 00:16:22,515 --> 00:16:24,315 And I made my Stephie go and beg for money 331 00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:26,351 like some common panhandler. 332 00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:29,387 [SOBS] 333 00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:31,122 - Well, if you'd like to make an appointment... 334 00:16:31,324 --> 00:16:34,258 - [YELLING] Oh, sure, like I can still afford you uptown shrinks! 335 00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:37,362 [SOBS] 336 00:16:39,065 --> 00:16:41,432 - Well, uh, these heels fit rather nicely. 337 00:16:41,601 --> 00:16:45,870 - I'm glad, and they're on sale, too. 338 00:16:46,039 --> 00:16:48,473 - Michael Chuck... Do you think 339 00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:51,342 perhaps the pressure of your current situation 340 00:16:51,511 --> 00:16:53,378 is putting a strain on your relationship 341 00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:56,080 with Stephie Dawn? 342 00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:57,515 - I can't afford her champagne tastes 343 00:16:57,683 --> 00:17:00,918 on my Dr. Pepper wages. [SOBS] 344 00:17:01,087 --> 00:17:04,389 Please help me! I've got a cupcake on my back! 345 00:17:04,590 --> 00:17:07,591 [SOBS] 346 00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:12,230 - There, there, there, there. 347 00:17:12,399 --> 00:17:15,233 Please don't cry on my skirt. It's suede. 348 00:17:15,402 --> 00:17:16,934 - Sorry. 349 00:17:17,103 --> 00:17:18,302 I don't know what's happening to me. 350 00:17:18,471 --> 00:17:21,906 I used to be... Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky. 351 00:17:22,075 --> 00:17:25,076 [CHUCKLES] 352 00:17:26,446 --> 00:17:29,613 And now I'm just like a Weeping Willie. 353 00:17:29,782 --> 00:17:32,050 [SOBS] 354 00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:36,421 I don't know... who I am anymore. 355 00:17:38,491 --> 00:17:40,291 - Well, that's... that's just the problem. 356 00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:43,461 You see, until you know who the real Michael 357 00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:46,064 or Chuck or Michael Chuck is... 358 00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:49,934 how can you expect to make any Stephie or Dawn 359 00:17:50,103 --> 00:17:51,635 or Stephie Dawn happy? 360 00:17:58,478 --> 00:18:00,911 - I'm glad you liked the shoes, Mom. 361 00:18:01,081 --> 00:18:02,480 You've given me a lot to think about. 362 00:18:02,648 --> 00:18:05,450 You're going to be canonized for sure. 363 00:18:05,618 --> 00:18:07,351 - Please take care of yourself. 364 00:18:13,659 --> 00:18:16,260 - Bye, Mom. 365 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,963 - Nice going, Michael Chuck. 366 00:18:19,132 --> 00:18:21,365 You never charged your mother for those pumps! 367 00:18:21,534 --> 00:18:23,167 Turn in your shoehorn. 368 00:18:23,336 --> 00:18:24,802 You're fired! 369 00:18:35,215 --> 00:18:37,115 - So the reason I asked both of you over here tonight 370 00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:39,083 was to just straighten out this business. 371 00:18:39,252 --> 00:18:40,451 - Dick is upset because the whole town 372 00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:42,253 is blaming him for your breakup. 373 00:18:42,422 --> 00:18:44,021 - Well, if Dick hadn't twisted our arms 374 00:18:44,190 --> 00:18:46,524 into playing cards, and allowed us to go the movies 375 00:18:46,726 --> 00:18:49,260 like we do every other second Tuesday of the month, 376 00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:51,596 Jim and I would still be friends. 377 00:18:51,764 --> 00:18:53,764 - That's what the town says. 378 00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:56,434 - I don't care what the town says. 379 00:18:56,603 --> 00:18:58,402 Y-You're throwing away a-a 40-year friendship 380 00:18:58,571 --> 00:19:01,139 over a stupid poker game. 381 00:19:01,307 --> 00:19:04,041 - Has it really been 40 years? 382 00:19:04,210 --> 00:19:06,444 - 41 this coming Lent. 383 00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:10,681 We've been through a lot together. 384 00:19:10,850 --> 00:19:13,384 - Yeah. Through heck and high water. 385 00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:19,357 Chester, it was wrong of me to accuse you of cheating. 386 00:19:19,559 --> 00:19:21,659 After all, I was cheating, too. 387 00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:26,397 - You were? 388 00:19:26,566 --> 00:19:29,200 - Well, you had every right to accuse me. 389 00:19:29,369 --> 00:19:30,768 I was cheating. 390 00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:34,472 - You were? This is nuts! 391 00:19:34,641 --> 00:19:35,606 - If truth be known, 392 00:19:36,742 --> 00:19:40,044 I had a couple of aces tucked away in my overalls, too. 393 00:19:40,213 --> 00:19:41,345 - What? 394 00:19:41,514 --> 00:19:44,248 I don't ever want to play cards w-with you lunatics again. 395 00:19:44,417 --> 00:19:46,284 All right. E-Everybody, go home! 396 00:19:46,452 --> 00:19:47,418 - I live here. 397 00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:49,320 - I don't care! Just get out of here! 398 00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:52,756 - Say, let's head on over to my place 399 00:19:52,958 --> 00:19:55,326 for a friendly game of seven-card stud. 400 00:19:55,495 --> 00:19:57,261 - Yeah, let's play clean for a change. 401 00:19:57,430 --> 00:19:58,762 GEORGE: Do we have to? 402 00:20:00,766 --> 00:20:01,732 - I mean, this is ridiculous! 403 00:20:01,901 --> 00:20:04,502 All my friends are cardsharks. 404 00:20:04,671 --> 00:20:07,771 At least when we play cards, it's on the up and up. 405 00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:09,973 - Boy, could I use a cup of coffee. 406 00:20:11,944 --> 00:20:13,944 - It is on the up and up, isn't it? 407 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,524 - Oh, Michael. 408 00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:28,125 I'm so glad you're here. 409 00:20:28,294 --> 00:20:30,794 I just finished ironing your work shirts for you, 410 00:20:30,963 --> 00:20:32,396 but you'll have to keep your jacket on 411 00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:33,831 because I only did the fronts. 412 00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:37,735 - Thanks, Steph, but you didn't have to bother. 413 00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:41,739 They're no longer work shirts. They're out-of-work shirts. 414 00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:43,674 - You lost your job? 415 00:20:44,677 --> 00:20:46,577 Well, what will we do now? 416 00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:49,480 How can you sink any lower? 417 00:20:52,518 --> 00:20:54,352 - Don't underestimate me. 418 00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:57,255 I've got momentum on my side. 419 00:20:57,423 --> 00:20:59,790 This is only the tip of my top, 420 00:20:59,992 --> 00:21:02,727 but I'm not going to drag you down with me. 421 00:21:04,797 --> 00:21:06,697 - What are you saying? 422 00:21:06,866 --> 00:21:08,733 - I'm on the bottom rung of that Steph-ladder. 423 00:21:08,901 --> 00:21:10,501 [GIGGLES] 424 00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:14,104 - You're not breaking up with me! 425 00:21:14,274 --> 00:21:17,475 - I can't stand being a loser in your eyes. 426 00:21:17,644 --> 00:21:19,744 Dammit! I want to be who I used to be... 427 00:21:19,912 --> 00:21:22,012 your knight in shining cashmere. 428 00:21:24,984 --> 00:21:27,318 - Okay, who is she? - Huh? 429 00:21:27,487 --> 00:21:28,786 - The one you're trading me in for, what is she? 430 00:21:28,954 --> 00:21:30,488 A dizzy brunette? 431 00:21:31,824 --> 00:21:33,758 - There's no one, Steph. I swear. 432 00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,961 - You're... dumping me for no one? 433 00:21:39,031 --> 00:21:40,898 You mean, I've been doing all this supportive woman crap 434 00:21:41,066 --> 00:21:42,866 for nothing? 435 00:21:43,035 --> 00:21:44,669 [SOBS] 436 00:21:44,837 --> 00:21:47,004 - And you're honestly willing to give up this? 437 00:21:51,444 --> 00:21:53,377 [SOBS] 438 00:21:54,380 --> 00:21:56,514 - Well, Michael, you do have problems! 439 00:21:56,683 --> 00:21:57,615 - No kidding! 440 00:21:57,784 --> 00:21:59,350 [SOBS] 441 00:22:02,689 --> 00:22:06,824 And uh, I...I have to, uh... 442 00:22:07,026 --> 00:22:09,627 I have to take back the mink, too. 443 00:22:09,796 --> 00:22:11,696 [SOBS] 444 00:22:26,412 --> 00:22:28,011 - [YELLING] Michael, I forbid you to dump me! 445 00:22:39,525 --> 00:22:40,658 [YELLING] Michael! 446 00:22:50,570 --> 00:22:52,102 - What happened? Where--where's your mink? 447 00:22:53,740 --> 00:22:55,138 - Michael repossessed it. 448 00:22:57,543 --> 00:22:58,576 - Why? 449 00:22:59,779 --> 00:23:02,312 - You don't give a mink to someone you've broken up with. 450 00:23:02,482 --> 00:23:03,781 - You mean, you and Michael... 451 00:23:06,719 --> 00:23:08,051 Are you going to be all right? 452 00:23:09,756 --> 00:23:11,789 - Dick, I'm a big girl. 453 00:23:11,957 --> 00:23:13,491 Worse things have happened. 454 00:23:13,693 --> 00:23:16,627 I certainly don't need any Michael Harris in my life. 455 00:23:23,002 --> 00:23:24,968 [CRYING] 456 00:23:26,105 --> 00:23:28,539 - It's going to be a long, long winter. 457 00:23:34,881 --> 00:23:37,882 [] 458 00:24:03,576 --> 00:24:04,575 - Meow. 36098

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