All language subtitles for Newhart S06E06

Good morning, George.

Oh, good.
You're finally up.

I'm thinking of doing something
kinda nuts,

and I wanted to give you guys
a chance to talk me out of it.

What is it?

Dick, Joanna,

I'm thinking of getting
a pair of regular jeans.

I'd say go for it, George.

And the-- and the hell with what
society is gonna think.

Thanks.
I'm gonna do it.

Oh, just one more thing.

Should I get the ones
with the zipper

or the button fly?

Uh, on that one, George,
you're--

you're gonna have to
follow your heart.

You know, honey,
I think we're--

witnessing the end
of an era here.

[ Sighs ]

-I'm a little sad in here.
-[ Door closing ]

Zipper, George.
Definitely zipper.

Hi, brunch bunch.

Is my birthday babe around?

Why does he always come up
to our table?

Michael!

And one to grow on.

[ Giggling ]

Hi, Dick, Joanna,
what can I get you?

How about French toast?

Me, uh-- me too.

Okay.

And you can get me

an unlimited supply
of Misty Lilac nail polish,

a credit card holder,
fully stocked...

We have copies
of your birthday list.

Okay. But just remember,

there's only three
shopping days left.

Steph's another year older
and we're all deeper in debt.

[ Giggles ]

Sor-- Sorry, Steph.

Uh, Michael,

I need to talk to you
about my birthday.

Now, don't take this
as criticism,

but what you did

for the last three years
was all wrong.

When have I failed you,
my little fajita?

Michael, one birthday,
you bought me a book.

Well, Stephanie, we just met.

For a while there, I thought
you might be deep.

This year, I promise you
a perfect birthday.

Oh, good.

Because, Michael,

I decided I want
a nice big party.

Well, Steph,
if it's a party you want

it's a party you'll get.

I'll send George out
for decorations,

I can get Dick
to put them up,

and I can get Joanna to
whomp up a birthday feast.

Oh, Michael, you'd do all that
for me?

[ Hissing ]

[ Hissing ]

How's it coming
with the balloons, honey?

Kind of in and out.

You still don't know how
to tie them off?

I know how to do it, I just--

I know how, I just can't do it.

George, you're wearing
your regular jeans.

Pretty spiffy.

Thanks.

They were inspected
and everything.

Number 21 did all right by me.

[ Chuckles ]

So you like them so far, George?

Yeah, except you have to
think a lot more wearing these.

What-- what do--
what do you mean?

Well, for one thing,
your shirt shows more,

so you gotta pay extra attention
to that.

And then...

there's whether to wear a belt
or trust your hips.

Jeans can, uh,
complicate a life.

Uh, George, you wanna help me
with the balloons?

Well, I was gonna go out
and strut, but okay.

Hi, Dick, Joanna.
Ooh la la, it's George.

Do I smell cake?

Nix that drool, handyman.

Where's Stephanie now?

She's out returning
one of my gifts.

She didn't even open it.
She just knew.

She's good.

Steph!

[ Sobs ]

Boy, one-- one of us--
must've really been flat.

Stephanie, what's wrong?

[ Sobbing ]

Don't worry, Stephanie.

I still have my overalls
up in my room.

I-- I don't think that's it,
George.

Steph, please stop.

I can't bear to see you cry.

Your eyes get all puffy and red.

Stephanie, just please try
to calm down and tell us

what's bothering you.

[ Sobs ]

Well, I went shopping...

and I tried on some clothes.

And I looked in a mirror
and realized...

[ Sobs ]

...I'm no longer blossoming.

Oh.

I don't get it, Dick.

I never minded getting older,

because... I just always kept
looking better and better.

And better and better.

But... this year,
I don't look better.

I've levelled off.

[ Sobs ]

Stephanie, you-- you haven't
lost your looks.

Well, I know that, Dick.

But... if I keep getting older
like this,

someday I will.

And then where will I be?

In a home for people
whose arms do this?

Oh, don't cry for me,
Stephantina.

I bet I can send
those tears packing

right back to their little ducts

with just two words:

plastic surgery.

When the time comes,

you oughta be able
to nip and tuck your way

to at least another 7,
8 years in my heart.

You-- you must really love her.

Stephanie, there's more to life
and relationships than looks.

Really?

Really?

Michael,

will you still love me

when I don't look like this
anymore?

Of course.

See?

Just-- just what would you
look like?

Michael, if-- if you love
Stephanie now,

you'll love her
when she's 80, right?

Michael, I need to hear you
say it.

No problem.

Steph...

Well, how many people live to be
80 anyway?

[ Laughs ]

What-- what I-- what I mean is,
I'll-- I'll al-- I'll always...

Happy birthday, Steph.

[ Sobs ]

S--So, uh--

so what-- so what do you say
we go down to that party?

[ Sobbing ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Blows out candle ]

[ Gasps ]

Oh, George, you scared me.

Gee, I hope I didn't give you
any gray hairs.

Sorry.

It's okay.

George, are you here because
you knew I was real depressed

and might want someone
to talk to

and you have the perfect thing
to say

to cheer me up?

Uh, not exactly.

I couldn't sleep,
thinking about that cake.

Don't bother wishing on it.
It doesn't work.

[ Sighs ]

This is the worst I've ever felt
in my whole life.

You know, Stephanie,

I'm sort of older,
and it's not so bad.

There are a lot of plusses.
If you make it to 100,

that fat weather guy will
announce your name on TV.

Getting older is easy for you.

-You can be George at any age.
-Knock wood.

I am my looks.

I'm pretty.

Okay, I'm beautiful.

Dazzling people with my looks
is all I do.

I'm a single threat, George.

And maybe,

when I lose my looks,

nobody will like me anymore.

Stephanie,
you're not just pretty.

There's a lot more to you
than that.

Really?

Sure.

Like what?

Well...

You're cute.

That's still looks, George.

You know how to avoid work
better than anybody

I've ever seen.

And you like that about me?

No. Actually it's, uh,
kind of annoying.

Uh...

I'm not really cheering you up,
am I?

No.

Darn.

See, if-- if you'd said,

"No, but thanks anyway,"

I could've said you're polite.

See, that's the kind of thing
I need to go on.

I know.

Well,

thanks anyway.

I don't think I can
count that one.

Gee, I wish I could make you
feel better, Stephanie.

Would it help if I sang?

Let's guess no.

Well, good night.

Morning, everybody.

George, what happened
to your regular jeans?

Well, I took 'em
for a trial walk

through town this morning,

and I realized
they just weren't me.

I mean, if I can't feel my knee
through my pocket,

there's something wrong
with my pants.

I-- I guess I understand.

And it wasn't just that.

A lot of people in this town

aren't that used to
designer labels.

I didn't really enjoy people
squinting at my bottom.

[ Sighs ]

I-- I guess that's where
we're different, George.

Well, I'll see you later.

[ Chuckles ]

Boy, it's a great feeling

not having to back out
of a room.

[ Clears throat ]

Here's your pancakes,
here's your juice,

here's your French toast.

Thank you, Stephanie.

How does everything... look?

Stephanie, you didn't--

you didn't forget something
this morning like...

...grooming?

You noticed?

Well, um, sort-- sort of.

I just wanted to see if people
would treat me differently

if I didn't look perfect
like usual.

And you did.
You were mean.

We-- we weren't mean.

We were just a-- a little
up-- upset here, but...

now that we've had a--
a-- a time to adjust, um,

I-- I-- I think you-- you look,

uh...

Fine.

Really?

Well, uh, one-- one of us
said it, didn't we?

Well, maybe aging isn't as bad
as old people make it seem.

Honey, I know I don't say it
often enough,

but... thanks for grooming.

Hi, uh-- hi all.

Michael, do you have any idea

what a horrible thing you did
to Stephanie last night?

Look, y-- you don't have to
tell me.

I know I've been
a Dudley Do Wrong.

Now, I'm gonna make it up
to Steph.

She's-- she's gonna be seeing
a brand-new

Michael Harris today,
I'll tell you that.

And-- and you're going
to be seeing a brand--

You-- you'll see.

I want her to know even if
her frosting gets stale, I'll--

I'll always love my cupcake.

That's-- that's from one of
Shakespeare's sonnets, isn't it?

[ Clears throat ]

-Hi.
-Hi, how you doin'?

Steph?

You fiends!
What did you do to her?

Oh! No, Michael, it's just--

it's just the new me.

Or should I say the old me.

Whoa! Ghost of Steph Future.

Well,

could you live with this?

Dick, Joanna,
if you need me

I'll be locked in my room
for eternity.

Dick, you've got to talk to her.

Me?

But, honey, you're so good
at making people feel better.

Remember when I thought

I was gonna get fired
from my job?

You said just the right thing
to cheer me up.

I-- I asked you to marry me.

Yeah, I got fired
and I didn't even care.

All right, I'll do it, but I--
I hope I can come up

with something besides the--
that proposal thing.

Uh, Stephanie, sit-- sit down.

For, uh-- for starters,
I didn't hear any creaking.

[ Laughs ]

[ Clears throat ]

Uh, Stephanie, I--
I know you've been--

you've been worried about--
about getting older and,

uh, everyone gets older and--

and there's nothing
you can do about it.

Phew. I feel much better.

Joanna said I was good at this.

[ Sighing ]

Uh, Stephanie, you--

you wouldn't wanna marry me,
would ya?

Hi. I'm Larry.

This is my brother Darryl,

and this is my other
brother Darryl.

We was wonderin' if we could
borrow some carbon paper.

Darryl here wants to try
bangin' his fist on a table

in triplicate.

[ Clears throat ]

Hi, Miss Stephanie.

Hope you had a blissful birthday
yesterday.

Did you get our
birthday gift yet?

I don't think so, Larry.

Darryl, you and your
overnight couriers.

Well, just so you won't have to
wait any longer,

we'll go out and trap you
an even bigger present.

Guys, why are you being
so nice to me?

I think I speak for all of us
when I say, "Huh?"

Haven't you noticed
that I'm ugly?

Miss Stephanie, you could never
be ugly to us. We like you.

Yeah, but...

will you like me when I'm...

old and gray and...

[ Crying ]
sagging?

Well, how shallow
do you think we are?

There's some depth
beneath this glitz.

We know that beauty's
only skin deep.

You take the weasel.

Ain't a prettier creature
on earth.

But once you skin 'em,
they look kinda,

well, if I may quote
Mad Magazine ,

blecch.

But fortunately,
underneath the beauty,

there's still a lot to recommend
the skinned weasel.

Aside from the obvious
gross-out appeal,

they're darned good eatin'.

Larry, are you saying that...

I have something underneath
my obvious

and usually stunning beauty?

You bet your bob.

I mean, there's times when
we've come over here

feelin' bluer than a whale,

and you would say
something nice.

Not necessarily to us.

But still it cheer us up
like nobody's business.

Really?

I do that for you?

Well, I could do that
even with flappy arms.

Oh, thank you, Larry.

All of you.

[ Kisses, laughs ]

Oh, guys, here's
the carbon paper.

I, uh-- I got four for ya.

Go for the record.

Oh, boy, thanks.

Oh, and, Miss Stephanie,
remember,

when you're 80 or 90,
you'll still have us as friends.

We like old people.

We enjoy playin'

What Do You See
in the Wrinkles.

Bye, guys.

Steph-- Stephanie, you're--
you're better.

[ Chuckles ]

[ Clears throat ]

You, uh-- you thought
about what I said, huh?

No, about what Larry said.

What-- what Larry said?

What did-- what did--
what did Larry say?

Well, I don't wanna get into
all the details, but...

it had to do with
skinning weasels.

I had that.

I-- I was--
I was gonna get to that.

Stephanie,
I've gotta talk to you.

Me too.

Michael, I found out

I have qualities
underneath my looks.

-That's great, Steph!
-[ Chuckles ]

What are they?

Well, I'm not sure.

I think one of them
is I can be nice and,

well, maybe we could find
the other ones together.

You know, Steph, I think
you're onto something here,

because I had an amazing
revelation too.

Are you ready?

Steph, you're not the most
beautiful girl in the world.

Michael,
say something else fast.

Steph, don't you see?

You're still the only one
for me.

Which means I must love you
not only for your looks,

but for something
besides your looks too.

What besides my looks?

Well, like you said, Steph,
we'll find those.

You know what else, Michael?

I'm the only who has realized

that I'm not blossoming
anymore.

So I won't actually
have to be kind

or find those other traits

until other people start
noticing I'm not blossoming.

And that won't be for years yet.

That's my Steph.

Forever and ever?

That's what we found out.

That I'll be able to love you
no matter what you look like.

Oh, Michael.

Give me a hug.

Oh, wait a minute, Steph.

Let's go through this together.

Meet you back here in an hour
looking perfect?

Deal.

Meow.