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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,034 --> 00:00:04,035 ( theme music playing ) 2 00:00:51,685 --> 00:00:54,085 - HI. I'M LARRY. 3 00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:57,589 ( audience applause ) 4 00:00:57,624 --> 00:00:58,523 THIS IS MY BROTHER DARYL, 5 00:00:58,558 --> 00:01:00,525 AND THIS IS MY OTHER BROTHER DARYL. 6 00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:02,927 COULD WE BORROW 150 POUNDS OF SUGAR? 7 00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,731 - CAN YOU MAKE DO WITH A CUP OF SUGAR? 8 00:01:06,766 --> 00:01:09,867 - NO. ONE CUP AIN'T GONNA HOLD THE DOOR OPEN. 9 00:01:11,271 --> 00:01:12,737 - LARRY, YOU DON'T NEED SUGAR FOR THAT. 10 00:01:12,772 --> 00:01:17,242 HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED USING, OH, A ROCK? 11 00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:21,446 - WHOA, YOU GOT SOME KIND OF ENGINEERING BACKGROUND 12 00:01:21,481 --> 00:01:22,480 OR SOMETHING? 13 00:01:25,285 --> 00:01:27,718 - HI, EVERYBODY. I HAVE GREAT NEWS. 14 00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:29,387 I'M GONNA REDECORATE MY ROOM. 15 00:01:29,423 --> 00:01:30,455 - YOU ARE? 16 00:01:30,490 --> 00:01:32,257 - EVERY SO OFTEN I CHANGE IT AROUND 17 00:01:32,292 --> 00:01:34,192 SO I DON'T FALL INTO A RUT. 18 00:01:35,862 --> 00:01:37,094 - HOW OFTEN DO YOU DO IT? 19 00:01:37,130 --> 00:01:38,429 - EVERY 10 YEARS. 20 00:01:39,932 --> 00:01:42,233 IN APRIL. 21 00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:43,268 ON A MONDAY. 22 00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:46,471 AFTER LUNCH. 23 00:01:48,107 --> 00:01:50,408 BUT THIS TIME, I'M PRETTY MUCH OUT OF IDEAS 24 00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:52,144 SO, JOANNA, COULD YOU-- 25 00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:55,080 - OH, GEORGE, I'M NOT SURE WE HAVE THE SAME TASTE. 26 00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:58,216 - JOANNA, YOU HAVE THE BEST TASTE OF ANYBODY I KNOW. 27 00:01:58,251 --> 00:02:00,551 - THEN OBVIOUSLY YOU NEED TO GET TO KNOW DARYL BETTER. 28 00:02:02,322 --> 00:02:04,188 HE'S THE ONE THAT CAME UP WITH THAT DIRT IDEA 29 00:02:04,223 --> 00:02:05,890 FOR THE FLOOR OF OUR CABIN. 30 00:02:07,227 --> 00:02:09,994 YOU MIGHT BE ABLE TO WOO HIM AS A CONSULTANT. 31 00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:12,030 - WELL, THAT'S VERY NICE OF YOU, FELLAS, 32 00:02:12,065 --> 00:02:15,166 BUT I DID ASK JOANNA FIRST. 33 00:02:15,201 --> 00:02:16,367 - THAT'S OKAY. 34 00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:18,870 DARYL IS PRICED A LITTLE BIT OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE. 35 00:02:21,541 --> 00:02:22,841 - SO, JOANNA? 36 00:02:22,876 --> 00:02:23,841 - OKAY, GEORGE. 37 00:02:23,877 --> 00:02:26,010 I'LL COME UP IN AN HOUR AND MAKE A FEW SUGGESTIONS 38 00:02:26,045 --> 00:02:27,712 BUT THAT'S ALL. - AN HOUR? 39 00:02:27,747 --> 00:02:29,881 YOU COULD GIVE A GUY SOME NOTICE. 40 00:02:34,220 --> 00:02:36,354 - HERE'S YOUR BREAKFAST. 41 00:02:36,389 --> 00:02:38,690 - STEPHANIE, JUST A HINT. 42 00:02:38,725 --> 00:02:43,227 IT'S BACON AND EGGS. NOT BACON THEN EGGS. 43 00:02:44,798 --> 00:02:46,330 - MORNING, STRATFORD-INNITES. 44 00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:48,667 WE INTERRUPT THIS BREAKFAST FOR A MICHAEL HARRIS BULLETIN. 45 00:02:48,702 --> 00:02:49,901 I'M GOING AWAY FOR A WEEK. 46 00:02:49,937 --> 00:02:51,035 - MICHAEL. 47 00:02:51,070 --> 00:02:53,104 - SAVE THOSE BOO-HOOS, STEPH. 48 00:02:53,139 --> 00:02:55,172 I'VE GOT A BIG JOB INTERVIEW. 49 00:02:55,208 --> 00:02:56,808 - MICHAEL! 50 00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:58,409 - IN SYRACUSE. 51 00:02:59,479 --> 00:03:01,112 - MICHAEL. 52 00:03:01,148 --> 00:03:02,913 - CUPCAKE, SYRACUSE IS UP AND COMING. 53 00:03:02,949 --> 00:03:05,816 IT'S OFTEN CALLED THE NEW YORK OF CENTRAL NEW YORK. 54 00:03:06,819 --> 00:03:08,620 - MICHAEL, YOU JUST CAN'T TAKE OFF FOR A WEEK. 55 00:03:08,655 --> 00:03:10,388 WHO'S GOING TO PRODUCE "VERMONT TODAY"? 56 00:03:10,423 --> 00:03:12,056 - NO PROBLEMO. 57 00:03:12,091 --> 00:03:15,827 I'VE ASKED ALMA SPROAT TO FILL MY FLOOR SHOTS. 58 00:03:17,297 --> 00:03:18,796 - THE STATION'S RECEPTIONIST? 59 00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:23,134 WELL, WHAT DOES SHE KNOW ABOUT PRODUCING A TELEVISION SHOW? 60 00:03:23,169 --> 00:03:24,769 - NOT A HELL OF A LOT. 61 00:03:24,805 --> 00:03:27,572 BUT IN CASE I DON'T GET THE JOB, WATCH MY STOCK RISE. 62 00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,607 ( laughing ) 63 00:03:29,642 --> 00:03:31,109 ALMA WILL BE FINE. 64 00:03:31,144 --> 00:03:33,411 THIS WEEK, I'VE LINED YOU UP WITH THE PERFECT GUEST, 65 00:03:33,447 --> 00:03:35,113 NAME: MR. NED NICHOLAS. 66 00:03:35,148 --> 00:03:37,515 OCCUPATION: BUILDS MODELS OF NATIONAL MONUMENTS 67 00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:39,017 OUT OF CHERRY LIFESAVERS. 68 00:03:40,253 --> 00:03:42,220 THAT'S THE SUPREME COURT BUILDING. 69 00:03:42,255 --> 00:03:44,188 - IT IS? 70 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:46,257 - C'MON, DICK, YOU'RE THE HISTORY BUFF. 71 00:03:46,292 --> 00:03:49,393 - I DON'T WANT NED NICHOLAS AND HIS CANDY MODELS. 72 00:03:49,429 --> 00:03:51,629 VERY BAD CANDY MODELS. 73 00:03:51,664 --> 00:03:53,397 I WANT DIMITRI ALEXANDOFF. 74 00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:55,700 - COME AGAIN? 75 00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:57,334 - DIMITRI ALEXANDOFF, 76 00:03:57,370 --> 00:04:00,438 THE GUY WHO SPENT 10 YEARS IN A RUSSIAN GULAG 77 00:04:00,474 --> 00:04:03,141 AND THEN ESCAPED TO THE UNITED STATES. 78 00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:05,376 - DICK, DICK, THE U.S., RUSSIA, US, THEM, 79 00:04:05,411 --> 00:04:07,078 WHAT CAN YOU SAY THAT HASN'T ALREADY BEEN SAID? 80 00:04:09,515 --> 00:04:10,548 - MICHAEL-- 81 00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:12,383 - WHOOPS, OOH, I'VE GOT A PLANE TO CATCH. 82 00:04:12,418 --> 00:04:13,618 OH, BYE, STEPH. 83 00:04:14,654 --> 00:04:16,654 WE NOW RETURN YOU TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED BREAKFAST. 84 00:04:16,723 --> 00:04:17,688 ( giggling ) 85 00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:22,894 ( music playing ) 86 00:04:23,897 --> 00:04:25,663 ( knock on door ) 87 00:04:25,698 --> 00:04:28,433 - HELLO, MR. LOUDON. I'M ALMA SPROAT. 88 00:04:28,468 --> 00:04:31,836 I'M REALLY EXCITED ABOUT PRODUCING YOUR SHOW THIS WEEK. 89 00:04:33,072 --> 00:04:36,841 - YEAH. YEAH, THIS CANDY ARCHITECT 90 00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:41,378 SHOULD REALLY BE SOMETHING. 91 00:04:41,414 --> 00:04:43,614 - OH, YES, IT'LL BE FASCINATING TO SEE 92 00:04:43,649 --> 00:04:45,383 WHAT THE WASHINGTON MONUMENT WILL LOOK LIKE 93 00:04:45,418 --> 00:04:48,186 IF IT'S RED AND ROUND. 94 00:04:49,689 --> 00:04:56,360 - YEAH, WE'LL PROBABLY WANT TO BUILD TO THAT. 95 00:04:56,395 --> 00:04:58,295 - I KNOW I'M BRAND NEW AT THIS JOB 96 00:04:58,331 --> 00:05:00,898 AND IT'S PROBABLY NOT MY PLACE TO SAY 97 00:05:00,934 --> 00:05:04,869 BUT... THIS GUEST IS REALLY STUPID. 98 00:05:06,839 --> 00:05:08,339 - OH, ALMA. 99 00:05:13,312 --> 00:05:14,779 WHAT CAN WE DO? 100 00:05:14,814 --> 00:05:15,980 HE'S ALREADY BOOKED. 101 00:05:16,015 --> 00:05:17,815 - WELL, LET'S GIVE HIM THE OLD HEAVE-HO. 102 00:05:19,686 --> 00:05:21,586 - WE CAN'T JUST CANCEL HIM, CAN WE? 103 00:05:24,357 --> 00:05:26,924 - SO, WHO SHALL WE BOOK INSTEAD? 104 00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:28,226 - CAN WE REALLY DO THIS? 105 00:05:28,261 --> 00:05:31,162 - C'MON, WHO'S YOUR DREAM GUEST? 106 00:05:31,197 --> 00:05:33,364 IF YOU COULD HAVE ANYONE ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH, 107 00:05:33,399 --> 00:05:34,632 WHO WOULD IT BE? 108 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,333 - AT THIS MOMENT, YOU. 109 00:05:38,671 --> 00:05:42,907 BUT MY SECOND CHOICE WOULD BE DIMITRI ALEXANDOFF. 110 00:05:42,942 --> 00:05:47,312 - THE ESCAPED RUSSIAN? HE'D BE A GREAT GUEST. 111 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:50,882 - YEAH, BUT HOW WOULD WE GET A BUSY GUY LIKE THAT 112 00:05:50,917 --> 00:05:52,984 ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE? 113 00:05:53,019 --> 00:05:55,153 - EASY, I KNOW HIS SECRETARY 114 00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:58,122 AND I HAVE THE RECIPE FOR A STROGANOFF 115 00:05:58,158 --> 00:06:01,493 THAT'LL MAKE HIM HUSTLE HIS BUNSKIES RIGHT OVER HERE. 116 00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:03,594 ( music playing ) 117 00:06:05,432 --> 00:06:08,233 - SO WHAT SORT OF CHANGES DO YOU USUALLY MAKE? 118 00:06:08,268 --> 00:06:13,905 - WELL, 10 YEARS AGO, I MOVED THIS FROM OVER THERE. 119 00:06:13,940 --> 00:06:17,441 TEN YEARS BEFORE THAT, I MOVED IT FROM OVER THERE. 120 00:06:17,476 --> 00:06:21,245 TEN YEARS BEFORE THAT, IT WASN'T HERE SO I BOUGHT IT. 121 00:06:22,449 --> 00:06:23,548 - WELL, HOW DO YOU USE THE ROOM? 122 00:06:23,583 --> 00:06:27,552 TO READ, TO WATCH TELEVISION, TO WORK? 123 00:06:27,587 --> 00:06:28,552 - YES. 124 00:06:29,923 --> 00:06:30,955 - MM-HM. 125 00:06:30,991 --> 00:06:34,292 - SO NOW THAT YOU'VE GOT A HANDLE ON THE PRIVATE ME, 126 00:06:34,327 --> 00:06:36,327 WHAT SHOULD THIS PLACE LOOK LIKE? 127 00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:42,066 - THIS. 128 00:06:42,102 --> 00:06:44,468 - C'MON, THERE MUST BE SOMETHING YOU COULD DO 129 00:06:44,503 --> 00:06:46,103 TO IMPROVE THIS PLACE. 130 00:06:46,138 --> 00:06:48,739 - NOTHING REALLY. 131 00:06:48,775 --> 00:06:50,574 MAYBE I'D ADD A SPLASH OF COLOR. 132 00:06:50,609 --> 00:06:54,245 - WHOA, COLOR! 133 00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:56,013 WHAT KIND OF COLOR? 134 00:06:56,049 --> 00:06:57,582 - WELL, WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE? 135 00:06:57,617 --> 00:07:00,251 - BOY, THEY'RE ALL SO NICE, I DON'T KNOW. 136 00:07:02,154 --> 00:07:03,120 - HOW ABOUT BLUE? 137 00:07:03,155 --> 00:07:06,324 - BLUE, THAT'S MY FAVORITE! 138 00:07:06,359 --> 00:07:08,493 NO OFFENSE TO THE OTHERS. 139 00:07:08,528 --> 00:07:11,428 - WELL, YOU COULD HAVE A BLUE BEDSPREAD. 140 00:07:11,464 --> 00:07:13,831 - A BLUE BEDSPREAD. 141 00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:16,501 JOANNA, YOU'VE GOT TO DO IT. 142 00:07:16,536 --> 00:07:18,836 HAVE YOUR WAY WITH THIS ROOM. 143 00:07:18,871 --> 00:07:20,171 I'LL STAY AT THE INN. 144 00:07:20,206 --> 00:07:22,340 DON'T SHOW IT TO ME UNTIL YOU'RE DONE. 145 00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:24,075 - IT MIGHT BE KIND OF FUN. 146 00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:26,711 I DID SEE SOME NICE CURTAINS AT BENFER'S. 147 00:07:26,746 --> 00:07:28,079 - CURTAINS! 148 00:07:29,349 --> 00:07:30,614 BOY! - GEORGE, 149 00:07:30,649 --> 00:07:32,649 I'LL DO IT, OKAY? 150 00:07:33,887 --> 00:07:35,887 ( music playing ) 151 00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:40,157 - WHEN I FINALLY STEPPED OFF PLANE, 152 00:07:40,193 --> 00:07:45,129 I REALIZED AT LAST I AM FREE. 153 00:07:45,165 --> 00:07:48,899 I THREW MYSELF TO THE GROUND. 154 00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:50,201 I TOOK DIRT. 155 00:07:50,236 --> 00:07:52,203 I PUT IT IN MY MOUTH. 156 00:07:53,639 --> 00:07:56,707 I WANTED TO TASTE FREEDOM. 157 00:07:56,742 --> 00:07:59,010 OH, MY GOD, IT WAS SWEET. 158 00:08:01,581 --> 00:08:02,746 - WOW! 159 00:08:05,384 --> 00:08:09,020 ANOTHER THING I'D LOVE TO ASK YOU-- 160 00:08:09,055 --> 00:08:11,488 OH, DARN -- WE'RE OUT OF TIME. 161 00:08:13,126 --> 00:08:16,127 - JOIN US NEXT WEEK ON "VERMONT TODAY." 162 00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:18,729 - AND WE'RE CLEAR. 163 00:08:18,765 --> 00:08:21,432 ( applause ) 164 00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:23,100 - WELL, THAT WAS WONDERFUL. 165 00:08:23,135 --> 00:08:25,837 I GREW AS A HUMAN BEING. 166 00:08:25,872 --> 00:08:28,906 - THANK YOU, DICK. YOU MUST BUY MY BOOK. 167 00:08:28,942 --> 00:08:32,777 COULD SOMEONE HELP ME CARRY SIX QUARTS OF STROGANOFF 168 00:08:32,812 --> 00:08:35,346 TO TRUNK OF MY COUPE DEVILLE WITH LANDAU ROOF? 169 00:08:37,016 --> 00:08:39,883 - YOU MUST SAY GOODBYE TO THE LOVELY MRS. SPROAT. 170 00:08:41,621 --> 00:08:43,988 - DICK, THIS SHOW WAS GOOD. 171 00:08:45,558 --> 00:08:46,757 - THANK YOU, J.J. 172 00:08:46,792 --> 00:08:49,360 - NO, I MEAN IT. IT WAS GOOD. 173 00:08:49,395 --> 00:08:51,695 NORMALLY, I DON'T GO IN FOR THIS PUBLIC AFFAIRS STUFF 174 00:08:51,731 --> 00:08:54,265 BUT TODAY, FIVE MINUTES INTO THE SHOW, 175 00:08:54,300 --> 00:08:56,800 WE COMPLETELY FORGOT OUR TRIVIAL PURSUIT GAME. 176 00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:01,372 - YOU PLAY GAMES WHILE YOU'RE DIRECTING MY SHOW? 177 00:09:01,408 --> 00:09:04,542 - WELL, IT KEEPS THE GUYS IN THE BOOTH FROM NODDING OFF. 178 00:09:05,678 --> 00:09:10,481 BUT TODAY, THE GAME WAS ALMOST, WELL, A DISTRACTION. 179 00:09:11,684 --> 00:09:14,685 THANKS TO THIS LITTLE LADY RIGHT OVER HERE. 180 00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:16,020 - THANKS. 181 00:09:16,055 --> 00:09:19,323 OH, J.J., WOULD YOU HELP ME CLEAR THINGS OFF THE SET? 182 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:20,858 - OH, ALMA. 183 00:09:20,893 --> 00:09:23,093 - I MADE SOME BUTTERSCOTCH CHEWIES. 184 00:09:25,064 --> 00:09:27,298 - WITH PEANUT BUTTER? 185 00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:31,736 ( sighing ) 186 00:09:34,741 --> 00:09:37,709 - DICK, I THINK YOU'VE HIT YOUR STRIDE. 187 00:09:37,744 --> 00:09:39,343 THIS SHOW MOVED ME. 188 00:09:39,378 --> 00:09:42,346 WHEN HE TOLD ABOUT FINALLY GETTING A LETTER FROM HIS WIFE 189 00:09:42,381 --> 00:09:43,848 AND THEY HAD CENSORED EVERYTHING 190 00:09:43,883 --> 00:09:49,386 EXCEPT THE WORDS "CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE," I WEPT. 191 00:09:50,389 --> 00:09:51,455 - WELL, THANKS, BEV. 192 00:09:51,490 --> 00:09:54,425 I KNOW YOU'RE LOOKING FOR A REPLACEMENT 193 00:09:54,460 --> 00:09:57,028 IN CASE MICHAEL GETS THE SYRACUSE JOB 194 00:09:57,063 --> 00:10:02,733 AND I JUST WANT TO SAY I'D LIKE TO RECOMMEND THAT GIRL. 195 00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:11,375 - WELL, FROM WHAT I'VE SEEN TODAY, 196 00:10:11,410 --> 00:10:13,377 SHE'S GREAT BUT MICHAEL PHONED. 197 00:10:13,412 --> 00:10:15,513 HE DIDN'T GET THE JOB. 198 00:10:15,548 --> 00:10:20,550 - OH. SO HE'LL BE STAYING ON. 199 00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:24,522 - YOU DON'T SOUND TOO HAPPY ABOUT THAT, DICK. 200 00:10:24,557 --> 00:10:27,324 - HE'S STAYING ON. 201 00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:29,827 WHOOPEE. 202 00:10:29,863 --> 00:10:32,263 - WELL, HE DOESN'T HAVE TO STAY. 203 00:10:33,733 --> 00:10:37,535 - YOU MEAN, FIRE HIM? 204 00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:38,969 - WELL, HE WOULDN'T REALLY BE FIRED. 205 00:10:39,004 --> 00:10:40,972 HE DOES A BUNCH OF OTHER SHOWS FOR US. 206 00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:41,939 - THAT'S TRUE. 207 00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:46,644 HE'S GOT "CARTOON LAGOON," "SEWING WITH SUZY," 208 00:10:46,679 --> 00:10:48,111 "BINKY THE CLOWN," 209 00:10:51,083 --> 00:10:52,349 "HEY, YOU, FARMER," 210 00:10:55,922 --> 00:10:58,422 THE "MR. SING WITH ME HOUR." 211 00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:05,028 - YOU WANT ALMA, DON'T YOU? 212 00:11:05,064 --> 00:11:07,965 - WELL, THIS IS MICHAEL'S MOST IMPORTANT SHOW. 213 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:09,900 I MEAN, YOU'RE THE STATION MANAGER, 214 00:11:09,936 --> 00:11:13,304 YOU MAKE UP YOUR MIND, I'LL ABIDE BY YOUR DECISION. 215 00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:15,306 - GOOD, BECAUSE I'VE DECIDED TO LET YOU DECIDE. 216 00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:17,675 MICHAEL OR ALMA, BUT JUST TELL ME BY TOMORROW. 217 00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:25,349 ( music playing ) 218 00:11:26,786 --> 00:11:29,353 - I'M READY TO SHOW GEORGE'S ROOM. 219 00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:31,589 HE IS SUCH A PACK RAT. 220 00:11:32,826 --> 00:11:34,358 I HAD TO FIND A PLACE IN THE GARAGE 221 00:11:34,393 --> 00:11:36,461 FOR 20 YEARS OF "BOY'S LIFE." 222 00:11:39,765 --> 00:11:41,198 - SOUNDS PRETTY. 223 00:11:42,569 --> 00:11:45,970 - OH, HONEY, ARE YOU STILL WORRIED ABOUT ALMA AND MI-- 224 00:11:48,675 --> 00:11:51,108 - ABOUT ALMA AND MICHAEL? 225 00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:52,843 - REMEMBER LAST NIGHT YOU SUGGESTED 226 00:11:52,878 --> 00:11:54,612 I TRY TO THINK OF ALL THE GOOD THINGS 227 00:11:54,647 --> 00:11:55,646 MICHAEL HAD DONE FOR ME? 228 00:11:55,681 --> 00:11:56,580 - YEAH. 229 00:11:56,616 --> 00:11:57,581 - ALL I COULD COME UP WITH 230 00:11:57,616 --> 00:11:59,583 WAS THE TIME I WAS WALKING IN THE DRIVEWAY 231 00:11:59,619 --> 00:12:01,485 AND HE SWERVED TO MISS ME. 232 00:12:04,590 --> 00:12:06,557 - SOUNDS LIKE YOU SHOULD GO WITH ALMA. 233 00:12:06,592 --> 00:12:08,125 - ARE YOU NUTS? THAT WOULD CRUSH-- 234 00:12:14,767 --> 00:12:16,567 - THAT WOULD CRUSH MICHAEL. 235 00:12:16,603 --> 00:12:18,168 - THEN I GUESS YOU'LL STAY WITH HIM. 236 00:12:18,204 --> 00:12:19,170 - THAT'S STUPID. 237 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:23,073 ALMA JUST PRODUCED THE BEST SHOW I EVER DID. 238 00:12:23,109 --> 00:12:27,178 I MEAN, SHOULDN'T KINDNESS, DECENCY AND SKILL BE REWARDED? 239 00:12:27,213 --> 00:12:28,713 - YES. - NO! 240 00:12:30,283 --> 00:12:31,515 I DON'T WANT TO FIRE MICHAEL. 241 00:12:31,550 --> 00:12:33,885 I DO FEEL SOMETHING FOR HIM. 242 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:38,722 THE KIND OF AFFECTION YOU FEEL FOR A PUPPY 243 00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:40,524 THAT YOU DON'T LIKE VERY MUCH. 244 00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:43,661 I MEAN, WHAT THE HELL AM I GONNA DO? 245 00:12:43,696 --> 00:12:45,329 I HAVE TO DECIDE BETWEEN MICHAEL-- 246 00:12:48,401 --> 00:12:49,399 - BETWEEN MICHAEL-- 247 00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:50,701 - STOP IT! STOP IT! 248 00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:56,307 STOP TALKING ABOUT IT BEHIND MY BACK. 249 00:12:56,342 --> 00:12:58,508 - STEPHANIE, I DIDN'T KNOW YOU KNEW. 250 00:12:58,544 --> 00:13:00,110 - HOW CAN I NOT KNOW SOMETHING 251 00:13:00,146 --> 00:13:03,581 THAT'S GOING TO DESTROY MICHAEL LIKE THIS? 252 00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,816 - THERE'S NOTHING DEFINITE ABOUT IT YET. 253 00:13:05,852 --> 00:13:07,151 - WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 254 00:13:07,186 --> 00:13:09,753 THESE ARE DEFINITELY SPLIT ENDS. 255 00:13:11,691 --> 00:13:15,092 AND IN CASE YOU DIDN'T SAY IT LOUD ENOUGH, YES, EVERYBODY, 256 00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:18,162 STEPHANIE VANDERKELLEN HAS SPLIT ENDS. 257 00:13:18,197 --> 00:13:19,329 ( sobbing ) 258 00:13:19,365 --> 00:13:22,366 ( music playing ) 259 00:13:28,308 --> 00:13:29,307 - OKAY. 260 00:13:31,377 --> 00:13:33,677 WELL? WHAT DO YOU THINK? 261 00:13:33,713 --> 00:13:37,347 - IT'S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL ROOM I EVER SAW. 262 00:13:37,382 --> 00:13:41,151 I NEVER-- WHOA, THAT WAS CLOSE. 263 00:13:41,186 --> 00:13:43,987 - GEORGE, RELAX, THE RUG IS THERE 264 00:13:44,023 --> 00:13:46,056 FOR YOU TO WALK ON AND ENJOY. 265 00:13:46,092 --> 00:13:47,557 - GREAT. 266 00:13:50,796 --> 00:13:54,164 OH, WHAT A LOVELY BEDSPREAD. 267 00:13:54,199 --> 00:13:56,166 - IT'S A 200-YEAR-OLD ANTIQUE. 268 00:13:56,201 --> 00:13:58,435 - AH-AH-AHH. 269 00:13:58,470 --> 00:14:01,705 AND WOW, LOOK AT THOSE PRETTY CUSHIONS. 270 00:14:01,741 --> 00:14:03,140 - I'M GLAD YOU LIKE THEM. 271 00:14:04,143 --> 00:14:06,410 DID YOU NOTICE THE WAY THE RASPBERRY CANDIES 272 00:14:06,445 --> 00:14:09,713 BRING OUT THE COLOR IN THOSE THROW PILLOWS? 273 00:14:09,749 --> 00:14:11,782 - I'M SORRY, I DIDN'T. 274 00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:18,755 - BOY, THIS LOOKS COMFY. 275 00:14:18,791 --> 00:14:20,090 - AREN'T YOU GONNA SIT IN IT? 276 00:14:20,126 --> 00:14:21,425 - I CAN'T, IT'LL WRINKLE. 277 00:14:21,460 --> 00:14:22,793 - NO. 278 00:14:22,828 --> 00:14:25,095 NO, IT WON'T. SIT. 279 00:14:25,131 --> 00:14:26,863 - I CAN'T. - SIT. 280 00:14:29,468 --> 00:14:32,937 - I CAN'T. - SIT! 281 00:14:32,972 --> 00:14:34,104 - SEE, IT DID WRINKLE. 282 00:14:34,140 --> 00:14:35,072 - NO, IT DIDN'T. 283 00:14:36,109 --> 00:14:39,410 WELL, GEE, IT DID WRINKLE. 284 00:14:39,445 --> 00:14:41,045 ( knocking on door ) 285 00:14:41,147 --> 00:14:42,279 - HI. 286 00:14:42,314 --> 00:14:43,581 TO BE BRIEF, IT'S US. 287 00:14:48,454 --> 00:14:50,354 WE'RE HERE TO WISH YOU A HAPPY ROOM-WARMING. 288 00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:51,588 - GET OFF THE RUG! 289 00:14:56,462 --> 00:14:57,761 - GEORGE. 290 00:14:57,797 --> 00:14:59,030 - I'M SORRY. 291 00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:02,133 WHY DON'T YOU MAKE YOURSELVES COMFORTABLE? 292 00:15:02,168 --> 00:15:04,534 - NOT ON THE BED! 293 00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:07,004 YOU THREE GUYS CAN SIT ON THE WRINKLED CHAIR. 294 00:15:15,681 --> 00:15:17,681 - DARYL LIKES WHAT YOU'VE DONE WITH THE ROOM. 295 00:15:17,717 --> 00:15:19,183 - THANK YOU. 296 00:15:19,218 --> 00:15:22,019 THAT'S VERY FLATTERING, COMING FROM A DECORATOR. 297 00:15:22,054 --> 00:15:24,255 - I'M AFRAID YOU'RE BARKING UP THE WRONG DARYL. 298 00:15:26,392 --> 00:15:27,958 THE DECORATOR DARYL FEELS 299 00:15:27,994 --> 00:15:30,727 YOU'VE MADE INEFFECTUAL USE OF YOUR SPACE. 300 00:15:34,133 --> 00:15:38,035 - NO OFFENSE, GUYS, BUT I THINK JOANNA HAS CREATED A WARM, 301 00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:40,204 COMFORTABLE, INVITING-- DON'T TOUCH THE CANDY. 302 00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:41,638 YIKES! 303 00:15:47,446 --> 00:15:50,847 - OH, DEAR, LOOK HOW LATE IT'S GOTTEN. 304 00:15:50,883 --> 00:15:52,716 C'MON, DARYL. 305 00:15:54,186 --> 00:15:56,386 WE'D LIKE TO THANK YOU FOR A LOVELY TIME. 306 00:15:56,422 --> 00:15:58,722 AND IF YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT HAVING ANY MORE PARTIES, 307 00:15:58,758 --> 00:16:01,291 WE CAN RSVP YOU RIGHT NOW. 308 00:16:01,326 --> 00:16:02,325 NO. 309 00:16:11,937 --> 00:16:14,938 - YOU HATE IT. - NO, I LOVE IT. 310 00:16:14,973 --> 00:16:19,009 I LOVE IT SO MUCH I COULD NEVER, NEVER, NEVER LIVE IN IT. 311 00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:23,914 EVERYTHING IS SO CLEAN, SO NEAT. 312 00:16:23,949 --> 00:16:27,951 - CLEAN IS THE PROBLEM? NEAT IS THE PROBLEM? 313 00:16:58,918 --> 00:17:01,385 - CAN YOU LIVE IN IT NOW? 314 00:17:01,420 --> 00:17:02,419 - I GUESS SO. 315 00:17:04,090 --> 00:17:06,323 IF THE BOARD OF HEALTH SAYS IT'S OKAY. 316 00:17:11,931 --> 00:17:13,931 ( music playing ) 317 00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:16,300 ( knocking on door ) 318 00:17:16,335 --> 00:17:17,467 Dick: COME IN. 319 00:17:17,503 --> 00:17:18,568 - HI, DICK. 320 00:17:18,604 --> 00:17:20,604 YOUR PRODIGAL PRODUCER HAS RETURNED. 321 00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:23,840 - MICHAEL, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU. 322 00:17:23,876 --> 00:17:27,177 - SURE THING. OH, BETWEEN YOU, ME AND THE LAMP POST, 323 00:17:27,213 --> 00:17:30,147 HOW DID ALMA DO? 324 00:17:30,182 --> 00:17:32,215 - ALMA WAS TERRIFIC. 325 00:17:32,250 --> 00:17:33,717 - SWELL. I MUST REMEMBER TO GIVE HER 326 00:17:33,752 --> 00:17:35,719 ONE OF MY PATENTED WELL-DONES. 327 00:17:37,923 --> 00:17:39,890 - MICHAEL, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU. 328 00:17:39,925 --> 00:17:41,691 - SAY NO MORE, DICK. 329 00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:45,129 I KNOW YOU WANT TO OFFER YOUR CONDOLENCES 330 00:17:45,164 --> 00:17:46,397 ABOUT THE SYRACUSE JOB. 331 00:17:46,432 --> 00:17:48,065 WELL, FORGET IT. 332 00:17:48,100 --> 00:17:49,699 ( sniggering ) 333 00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,701 I REALIZE THAT THAT WAS NOT THE JOB 334 00:17:51,737 --> 00:17:52,903 FOR THIS UP-AND-COMER. 335 00:17:52,939 --> 00:17:54,571 I'D RATHER BE HERE AROUND PEOPLE I TRUST 336 00:17:54,606 --> 00:17:57,607 AND, PARDON MY MUSH, REALLY GET OFF ON. 337 00:18:01,180 --> 00:18:02,213 - MICHAEL-- - BESIDES, 338 00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:04,314 IT'S HARDER TO BURST ON THE SCENE FROM SYRACUSE. 339 00:18:04,349 --> 00:18:05,515 THERE HAVE BEEN STUDIES. 340 00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:09,352 OH, BY THE WAY, NOW, THE WORD I'M GIVING THE UNDERLINGS HERE 341 00:18:09,388 --> 00:18:12,222 IS THAT I'M THE ONE WHO TURNED THEM DOWN. 342 00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:13,657 IT'S IMPORTANT TO HAVE THE RESPECT OF THE PEOPLE 343 00:18:13,692 --> 00:18:15,625 YOU WORK WITH, NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU HAVE TO LIE. 344 00:18:18,197 --> 00:18:26,336 - MICHAEL, SOMETIMES WE GO AWAY AND WHEN WE COME BACK, 345 00:18:26,372 --> 00:18:29,840 THINGS AREN'T THE SAME AS THEY USED TO BE. 346 00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:32,142 - WOW, THAT'S PROFOUND. 347 00:18:32,177 --> 00:18:33,343 UP FOR LUNCH? 348 00:18:34,847 --> 00:18:36,113 - MICHAEL, YOU'RE-- 349 00:18:41,186 --> 00:18:44,822 YOU'RE AN OKAY PRODUCER. 350 00:18:44,857 --> 00:18:47,157 BUT ALMA IS BETTER 351 00:18:47,192 --> 00:18:50,394 AND THAT'S WHY I'M HIRING HER FOR "VERMONT TODAY" AND -- 352 00:18:53,032 --> 00:18:56,534 AND REVERSING THE PROCESS FOR YOU. 353 00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:02,005 - COULDN'T HEAR YOU, DICK. 354 00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:05,643 - YOU'RE SORT OF FIRED. 355 00:19:07,045 --> 00:19:08,412 - WHAT? 356 00:19:08,447 --> 00:19:10,414 - I'M SORRY. 357 00:19:10,449 --> 00:19:11,348 - FIRED? 358 00:19:11,383 --> 00:19:12,850 Dick: BUT ONLY FROM "VERMONT TODAY." 359 00:19:12,885 --> 00:19:17,220 I MEAN, YOU STILL HAVE ALL THOSE OTHER SHOWS. 360 00:19:17,256 --> 00:19:18,655 MICHAEL, I-- - NO, DON'T TOUCH ME. 361 00:19:22,728 --> 00:19:26,931 - I WASN'T GOING TO TOUCH YOU. 362 00:19:26,966 --> 00:19:30,100 - "VERMONT TODAY" WAS MY SHOW. 363 00:19:30,136 --> 00:19:32,202 I CREATED IT. I CREATED YOU. 364 00:19:32,238 --> 00:19:34,972 I MADE YOU WHAT YOU ARE TODAY, 365 00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:37,041 YOU BACK STABBER. 366 00:19:39,111 --> 00:19:42,579 I'M SORRY, DICK, BUT AFTER THIS SLAP IN THE FACE, 367 00:19:42,614 --> 00:19:46,250 I DON'T THINK I CAN WORK WITH YOU AGAIN. 368 00:19:46,285 --> 00:19:48,519 - WELL, THAT'S KIND OF GOOD. 369 00:19:53,959 --> 00:19:57,361 BECAUSE, AS I SAID, YOU WON'T. 370 00:19:59,298 --> 00:20:00,330 ( knocking on door ) 371 00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:01,398 - DICK, GUESS WHAT? 372 00:20:01,433 --> 00:20:02,432 OH, HI, MICHAEL. 373 00:20:02,467 --> 00:20:04,100 I JUST GOT A CALL FROM SYRACUSE. 374 00:20:04,136 --> 00:20:05,536 THEY SAW SUNDAY'S "VERMONT TODAY" 375 00:20:05,571 --> 00:20:06,770 AND OFFERED ME A JOB, 376 00:20:06,805 --> 00:20:08,304 THE ONE YOU SAID THEY COULD SHOVE. 377 00:20:09,642 --> 00:20:11,909 AND SYRACUSE IS CLOSE TO MY DAUGHTER. 378 00:20:11,944 --> 00:20:14,477 OH, I OWE ALL THIS TO BOTH OF YOU. 379 00:20:14,513 --> 00:20:15,913 MWAH! 380 00:20:15,948 --> 00:20:17,581 MWAH! 381 00:20:17,616 --> 00:20:19,883 IS THIS A HAPPY DAY OR WHAT? 382 00:20:31,797 --> 00:20:37,934 - WELL, DICK, LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE OUT OF A PRODUCER. 383 00:20:39,137 --> 00:20:42,873 AND YOU CAN JUST FORGET THIS GUY. 384 00:20:46,279 --> 00:20:47,844 BEG AND WEEP ALL YOU WANT. 385 00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:52,115 THE FACT IS I COULD NEVER COME BACK TO "VERMONT TODAY." 386 00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:57,921 - I UNDERSTAND, MICHAEL, AND MAYBE IT'S BEST 387 00:20:57,956 --> 00:21:01,591 IF WE BOTH PART COMPANY 388 00:21:01,627 --> 00:21:04,628 AND START FRESH. 389 00:21:04,664 --> 00:21:09,366 - PLEASE, DICK, PLEASE, PLEASE, I WANT TO COME BACK. 390 00:21:09,401 --> 00:21:12,202 PLEASE, PLEASE, I'LL BEG IF I HAVE TO. 391 00:21:17,542 --> 00:21:19,843 - MICHAEL, BEFORE YOU LOSE YOUR PRIDE-- 392 00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:22,846 - I'LL DO ANYTHING YOU WANT, 393 00:21:22,882 --> 00:21:25,148 ANYTHING JUST TO GET MY JOB BACK. 394 00:21:25,183 --> 00:21:26,583 - WE HAVE DIFFERENT TASTES. 395 00:21:26,652 --> 00:21:29,553 WE'VE NEVER AGREED ON A GUEST FOR THE SHOW. 396 00:21:29,588 --> 00:21:37,360 - JUST TELL ME WHO YOU WANT AND I'LL WRITE IT ON THE FORM. 397 00:21:37,396 --> 00:21:40,897 - DR. RAOUL FINCH, THE PALEONTOLOGIST. 398 00:21:44,370 --> 00:21:45,836 - HOW ABOUT IF HE CAME IN ON THE ARMS OF SOME 399 00:21:45,871 --> 00:21:47,604 LOCAL CHEERLEADERS? 400 00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:48,638 - MICHAEL. 401 00:21:48,674 --> 00:21:50,174 - HE COULD TALK ABOUT HOW THEIR BONES DIFFER 402 00:21:50,209 --> 00:21:53,843 FROM THOSE OF CRO-MAGNON CHEERLEADERS, HM? 403 00:21:53,879 --> 00:21:55,445 - MICHAEL. 404 00:21:55,481 --> 00:21:56,446 - ALL RIGHT. 405 00:21:56,481 --> 00:21:58,382 YOU PICK THE GUESTS. 406 00:21:58,417 --> 00:21:59,850 NO ARGUMENTS. 407 00:21:59,885 --> 00:22:02,252 SO WHAT DO YOU SAY? 408 00:22:02,287 --> 00:22:07,658 AM I STILL YOUR PRODUCER? 409 00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:12,129 - I KNOW I'M GONNA REGRET THIS MORE THAN I ALREADY DO, 410 00:22:13,999 --> 00:22:14,965 ( sighing ) 411 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,232 OKAY. 412 00:22:20,973 --> 00:22:23,606 - THAT'S THE FINEST THING-- 413 00:22:23,642 --> 00:22:25,075 ( sighing ) 414 00:22:25,110 --> 00:22:28,979 THAT'S THE FINEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN A HUMAN BEING DO. 415 00:22:29,982 --> 00:22:33,984 WELL, FROM NOW ON, IT'S GONNA BE A WHOLE NEW SHOW. 416 00:22:36,155 --> 00:22:37,720 AND A WHOLE NEW ME. 417 00:22:56,975 --> 00:22:59,910 ( theme music playing ) 418 00:23:26,271 --> 00:23:27,336 - MEOW! 29509

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