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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:09,302 ( Theme music playing ) 2 00:00:17,661 --> 00:00:20,497 - ( Woman crying ) - Woman #2: It's okay. Let it go. 3 00:00:20,532 --> 00:00:24,670 Let it go. This is pushing buttons, and that's all right. 4 00:00:24,704 --> 00:00:27,741 - No, you're safe, you're safe. - Uh... 5 00:00:27,775 --> 00:00:30,209 It's all right. Let it go. 6 00:00:30,244 --> 00:00:33,245 - Oh my. Oh. - Uh... 7 00:00:34,745 --> 00:00:37,244 - Oh. - I just want to get some chubby hubby. 8 00:00:37,278 --> 00:00:39,611 Sir, could you please give us a moment? 9 00:00:39,645 --> 00:00:41,944 Yeah, aw. 10 00:00:41,980 --> 00:00:43,445 Aw aw. 11 00:00:43,480 --> 00:00:45,746 Yes, aw. 12 00:00:45,781 --> 00:00:48,715 A little to the left... Or the right. 13 00:00:48,749 --> 00:00:53,949 - Separate separate. - Excuse, me. 14 00:00:53,983 --> 00:00:55,582 I'm trying to get to the chubby hubby. 15 00:00:55,617 --> 00:00:57,082 - Yes, you said that. - Yeah. 16 00:00:57,117 --> 00:01:00,283 Yes, okay, that's a good girl. 17 00:01:00,318 --> 00:01:02,920 Oh oh my. 18 00:01:02,955 --> 00:01:05,087 Poor baby. 19 00:01:05,121 --> 00:01:08,155 Sir! Excuse me. Now I've tried to be nice. 20 00:01:08,189 --> 00:01:10,657 I have asked you to give us some space. 21 00:01:10,690 --> 00:01:14,226 - What's this about? - None of your business. 22 00:01:14,261 --> 00:01:15,829 Personal-- It's a personal thing? 23 00:01:15,863 --> 00:01:19,266 - Would you please? - Okay, all right. 24 00:01:19,300 --> 00:01:21,502 Thank you. 25 00:01:21,536 --> 00:01:24,205 Don't pay attention to that jerk. 26 00:01:24,239 --> 00:01:27,607 Oh, it's okay. 27 00:01:27,642 --> 00:01:30,777 Oh, are you all right, sweetheart? 28 00:01:30,813 --> 00:01:33,346 It's gonna be-- 29 00:01:33,380 --> 00:01:35,947 Marty: You're not going to believe this. 30 00:01:35,982 --> 00:01:38,545 Richard is dating a burlesque dancer. 31 00:01:38,579 --> 00:01:40,044 - I had dinner with them. - Really? 32 00:01:40,078 --> 00:01:41,409 I don't like to sound like a pig, 33 00:01:41,444 --> 00:01:43,845 but she has magnificent breasts. 34 00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:46,048 - What's she like? - She's dumb. 35 00:01:46,082 --> 00:01:47,814 ( Snickers ) 36 00:01:47,848 --> 00:01:51,484 All she wanted to talk about was how she dances, 37 00:01:51,518 --> 00:01:53,451 how the crowd loves her and-- 38 00:01:53,486 --> 00:01:54,988 - Oh, here he is. - I'm sorry. 39 00:01:55,021 --> 00:01:57,723 - Huh? - Let me alone. Don't yell at me. 40 00:01:57,757 --> 00:02:00,324 They moved the audition. It's in 10 minutes. 41 00:02:00,359 --> 00:02:02,826 I was on the phone with an ex-girlfriend who was suicidal, 42 00:02:02,861 --> 00:02:05,996 so I couldn't exactly hang up to say I want to go to a salad bar. 43 00:02:06,030 --> 00:02:08,097 Wait, she's going to commit suicide and she calls you? 44 00:02:08,131 --> 00:02:10,300 A lot of people call me who are suicidal. 45 00:02:10,333 --> 00:02:11,966 I don't think you'd be my suicide call. 46 00:02:12,002 --> 00:02:14,003 - You're kidding me. - No, I don't think you'd be. 47 00:02:14,037 --> 00:02:15,770 What would bring you to the brink of suicide? 48 00:02:15,805 --> 00:02:17,572 Can I ask him why he wouldn't call me first? 49 00:02:17,605 --> 00:02:18,873 - What would bring you-- - Him. 50 00:02:18,907 --> 00:02:20,174 - He would? - He would. 51 00:02:20,208 --> 00:02:22,376 So you'd be calling the guy who caused you to-- Okay. 52 00:02:22,411 --> 00:02:24,544 By the way, are you dating a burlesque dancer? 53 00:02:24,579 --> 00:02:27,213 - What makes you say that? - We heard. 54 00:02:27,249 --> 00:02:29,916 I didn't say anything bad. I said she was beautiful. 55 00:02:29,950 --> 00:02:31,851 - Why do you have to blab about my personal life? - What do you mean? 56 00:02:31,885 --> 00:02:33,985 You didn't swear him to secrecy. What's the big deal? 57 00:02:34,020 --> 00:02:35,687 Hey, if it wasn't for fucking burlesque, 58 00:02:35,721 --> 00:02:37,288 we wouldn't have Chaplin or the Marx brothers. 59 00:02:37,322 --> 00:02:39,824 Oh, Chaplin was a great pole dancer. 60 00:02:39,858 --> 00:02:41,992 Admit it, the only reason you're going out with her 61 00:02:42,027 --> 00:02:43,261 is because of her ample bosom. 62 00:02:43,295 --> 00:02:45,528 That's despicable to say that to me. Of course not. 63 00:02:45,563 --> 00:02:49,666 - For her brains and her sense of worth. - Have you set a date aside 64 00:02:49,700 --> 00:02:51,901 when you're going to finally look at her face? 65 00:02:51,935 --> 00:02:53,870 ( Laughing ) 66 00:02:53,905 --> 00:02:56,173 That's-- That's really funny. 67 00:02:56,208 --> 00:02:57,441 Yeah, laugh it up. 68 00:02:57,475 --> 00:03:00,778 Listen, I have an audition now, so if you don't mind. 69 00:03:00,812 --> 00:03:02,547 - I'll see you later. - That's very funny. 70 00:03:02,581 --> 00:03:04,649 That's it? You come for two minutes? 71 00:03:04,684 --> 00:03:06,817 - I told you why I'm late. I have an audition. - All right. 72 00:03:06,852 --> 00:03:08,253 Quite frankly I'm a little offended 73 00:03:08,287 --> 00:03:10,721 by you just focusing on a woman's breasts and nipples 74 00:03:10,756 --> 00:03:12,323 when maybe I'm in love with her, all right? 75 00:03:12,358 --> 00:03:13,925 - So how does that-- - You're always in love. 76 00:03:13,959 --> 00:03:15,192 No, I'm not always in love. 77 00:03:15,227 --> 00:03:17,528 She also gives to charity and she has a great personality. 78 00:03:17,562 --> 00:03:19,062 - She gives to charity? - That's right. 79 00:03:19,096 --> 00:03:20,397 - Jeff: Milk? - Huh? 80 00:03:20,431 --> 00:03:21,966 - Jeff: She gives milk? - That's funny too? 81 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:23,266 You guys are on a fuckin' roll. 82 00:03:23,300 --> 00:03:25,433 - I'm out. - Dance for underprivileged kids. 83 00:03:25,468 --> 00:03:28,369 - Charity! - Marty: Gives to charity? 84 00:03:28,404 --> 00:03:31,339 - All right, I gotta go. - Look at the stuff that comes out of his mouth. 85 00:03:31,373 --> 00:03:33,407 - I got an idea. - Jeff: Hmm? 86 00:03:33,441 --> 00:03:37,310 Why don't the three of us, one night this week, go see her dance? 87 00:03:37,344 --> 00:03:39,645 - Hell yes. - We're not doing anything wrong. 88 00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:42,115 No, let's go. He never said we couldn't. 89 00:03:42,149 --> 00:03:43,615 We can't say anything to him. 90 00:03:43,650 --> 00:03:45,417 Who's gonna-- He doesn't need to know. 91 00:03:45,452 --> 00:03:47,853 We sit in the back. I say we go. 92 00:03:47,887 --> 00:03:50,188 - What are you doing? - I don't need to do that. 93 00:03:50,222 --> 00:03:52,557 - I did a hands in. - Please, we don't need a hands in. 94 00:03:52,592 --> 00:03:53,959 I'm gonna get going. You got lunch? 95 00:03:53,993 --> 00:03:57,195 - I got it. I got it. - Okay, thank you. 96 00:03:57,230 --> 00:03:58,898 Yeah, let's go see her. What the hell? 97 00:03:58,932 --> 00:04:01,633 Oh, you'll love it, believe me. 98 00:04:03,171 --> 00:04:05,706 Excuse me, I've just gotta run out for one second. 99 00:04:05,740 --> 00:04:07,876 Could you just keep an eye on my computer for me? 100 00:04:07,910 --> 00:04:10,046 - Sure. - Thanks. 101 00:04:27,563 --> 00:04:29,165 Excuse me. 102 00:04:29,199 --> 00:04:31,100 Would you mind keeping an eye on that computer? 103 00:04:31,135 --> 00:04:34,538 - The guy asked me, but I have to go. - Um, yeah sure, okay. 104 00:04:34,572 --> 00:04:36,674 Good, thanks. 105 00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:53,627 Aha! 106 00:04:53,662 --> 00:04:55,964 Ha ha! 107 00:04:57,034 --> 00:04:59,668 Okay, this is the dog. 108 00:04:59,702 --> 00:05:02,304 This is the dog that's been going on my lawn. 109 00:05:02,339 --> 00:05:04,374 - No bag? Where's your bag? - Well... 110 00:05:04,408 --> 00:05:06,411 You know, life-- It gets so crazy sometimes. 111 00:05:06,445 --> 00:05:07,946 - Oh, life gets crazy? - Yeah. 112 00:05:07,980 --> 00:05:09,848 If you're gonna have a dog, you have to have a bag. 113 00:05:09,882 --> 00:05:12,049 I will bring a bag. I didn't bring a bag today. 114 00:05:12,085 --> 00:05:16,020 - I'm really sorry about that. - Because the dog without the bag-- It's incomplete. 115 00:05:16,055 --> 00:05:18,923 It's a marriage. The bag and the dog, they go together. 116 00:05:18,957 --> 00:05:20,657 I just don't see why you had to yell at me. 117 00:05:20,692 --> 00:05:22,861 I'm yelling for society, for everybody. 118 00:05:22,895 --> 00:05:24,395 - It's not just me. - Got it. 119 00:05:24,429 --> 00:05:26,597 - People make mistakes. - Every day? 120 00:05:26,631 --> 00:05:28,567 Roscoe, come. 121 00:05:28,601 --> 00:05:31,970 ( Jazz music playing ) 122 00:05:32,004 --> 00:05:34,006 Marty: Don't you love this place? 123 00:05:34,041 --> 00:05:36,143 - Leon: This shit is fucking amazing. - Marty: It's great. 124 00:05:36,178 --> 00:05:37,646 - Yeah. - Do you love it? 125 00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:39,550 - What are you doing? - I'm looking for Lewis. 126 00:05:39,584 --> 00:05:41,218 Let loose. He's not here. Have a good time. 127 00:05:41,254 --> 00:05:42,920 Marty: We ought to do this more often. 128 00:05:42,955 --> 00:05:44,756 Come to disgusting strip clubs? 129 00:05:44,790 --> 00:05:47,259 - Why is it disgusting? - Disgusting? Fuckin'-- That's a harsh word. 130 00:05:47,293 --> 00:05:50,696 - Watch this shit. - ( Crowd cheering ) 131 00:05:50,730 --> 00:05:52,999 - That's her. That's her. - That's her? 132 00:05:55,536 --> 00:05:59,107 It's like jell-o pudding inside of those motherfuckers. 133 00:05:59,141 --> 00:06:01,610 She is communicating right now. You understand? 134 00:06:01,644 --> 00:06:03,377 In Hawaii they move hands and hips. 135 00:06:03,411 --> 00:06:04,847 Out here it's titties. 136 00:06:04,881 --> 00:06:06,615 The fuckin' titties are talking right now. 137 00:06:06,649 --> 00:06:08,250 And what exactly are they saying? 138 00:06:08,284 --> 00:06:10,719 Those titties are a blabbermouth, you know what I'm talking about? 139 00:06:10,754 --> 00:06:13,089 They're fuckin' just yippity-yapping right now. 140 00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:15,959 ( Crowd cheering ) 141 00:06:24,371 --> 00:06:27,473 ( Slurping ) 142 00:06:29,276 --> 00:06:31,778 - Did you have fun? - No, not really. 143 00:06:31,812 --> 00:06:34,282 - Boy, I had a blast. - You know what I think? 144 00:06:34,316 --> 00:06:36,919 - What? - I think Lewis has lost his mind. 145 00:06:36,953 --> 00:06:39,722 - Why? - I just saw his girlfriend's tits, that's why. 146 00:06:39,757 --> 00:06:42,994 So what? He's not gonna marry her. He's just having fun. 147 00:06:55,141 --> 00:06:58,309 How can you not tell me you were going to see Stella? 148 00:06:58,342 --> 00:07:00,542 - She's my girlfriend, for Christ's sakes. - Yeah, you're right. 149 00:07:00,577 --> 00:07:02,044 We probably should have told you. 150 00:07:02,079 --> 00:07:03,979 But you didn't say we shouldn't go. 151 00:07:04,014 --> 00:07:07,449 And by the way, if you're dating somebody who takes their clothes off in public, 152 00:07:07,485 --> 00:07:09,753 then what's the difference? Everybody's gonna see her. 153 00:07:09,787 --> 00:07:12,123 You went there like a pervert. 154 00:07:12,157 --> 00:07:13,624 Hey, I didn't even see that much. 155 00:07:13,658 --> 00:07:15,627 What percentage of the show did you look at her breasts? 156 00:07:15,661 --> 00:07:17,263 - I saw like-- - Hello, tiger. 157 00:07:17,297 --> 00:07:18,431 Hi, honey. Good to see you. 158 00:07:18,465 --> 00:07:19,700 Hi, sweetie. Sorry I'm late. 159 00:07:19,734 --> 00:07:21,335 This is Larry, one of my oldest friends. 160 00:07:21,369 --> 00:07:23,170 - Hi, nice to meet you. I've heard so much about you. - Hi. 161 00:07:23,205 --> 00:07:24,807 I thought you said he was old. 162 00:07:24,841 --> 00:07:27,278 - You don't seem that old. - Well-- 163 00:07:27,312 --> 00:07:29,580 - Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you. - Mrs. Cole, 164 00:07:29,615 --> 00:07:32,685 I didn't know Marilyn Monroe was on the base, sir. 165 00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:35,322 He made out like you were a granddad, you know? 166 00:07:35,357 --> 00:07:36,793 You called me old? 167 00:07:36,826 --> 00:07:38,995 You're two days older than I am. 168 00:07:39,029 --> 00:07:41,331 You're a dissipated alcoholic. How dare you? 169 00:07:41,366 --> 00:07:43,101 - Recovering alcoholic. - All right, recovering. 170 00:07:43,135 --> 00:07:45,769 Okay, listen, sorry. I didn't mean to start an argument or anything. 171 00:07:45,804 --> 00:07:49,508 That's okay. By the way, I actually did see your show last night. 172 00:07:49,543 --> 00:07:53,712 - You came to see my show? - Yes, I enjoyed the presentation. 173 00:07:53,746 --> 00:07:54,914 What do you know about burlesque? 174 00:07:54,948 --> 00:07:56,716 I saw the movie "Gypsy" with Natalie Wood. 175 00:07:56,751 --> 00:07:59,553 Oh, then you should be a Professor at Ohio state and teach this. 176 00:07:59,587 --> 00:08:01,689 It sounds like you appreciate the art form. 177 00:08:01,723 --> 00:08:03,190 Well, I appreciate naked women. 178 00:08:03,224 --> 00:08:05,092 Did you like the air fucking number I did? 179 00:08:05,126 --> 00:08:07,329 - The air fucking was sensational. - You liked that? 180 00:08:07,363 --> 00:08:08,496 - Yeah, yeah? - Yes. 181 00:08:08,530 --> 00:08:10,198 But let me just say this, okay? 182 00:08:10,232 --> 00:08:12,234 Your breasts are magnificent. 183 00:08:12,269 --> 00:08:14,670 - Oh, thank you. Thank you. - What did you just say? 184 00:08:14,704 --> 00:08:17,139 You're not dissecting a frog in 12th-grade biology. 185 00:08:17,174 --> 00:08:19,877 - It's okay. I take it as a compliment. - She's not a specimen. 186 00:08:19,912 --> 00:08:23,080 By the way, I did notice in the show 187 00:08:23,115 --> 00:08:25,783 that there's a small mole 188 00:08:25,817 --> 00:08:27,485 on the underside of your right breast 189 00:08:27,520 --> 00:08:29,087 that you might want to get checked out. 190 00:08:29,121 --> 00:08:31,457 - Are you being serious? There's a mole? - Yeah yeah yeah. 191 00:08:31,492 --> 00:08:35,928 - Okay. - How did you see a small mole from where you were sitting? 192 00:08:35,963 --> 00:08:37,931 I have breast vision and that's how I'm able to-- 193 00:08:37,965 --> 00:08:39,265 - You have breast vision? - Yes. 194 00:08:39,300 --> 00:08:40,767 Why don't you go to every burlesque show 195 00:08:40,802 --> 00:08:42,536 and just stare at all the breasts? 196 00:08:42,570 --> 00:08:44,205 I could be a burlesque dermatologist. 197 00:08:44,239 --> 00:08:46,240 - We'll get it checked out. - Thank you very much. 198 00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:48,243 - For sure. - You're welcome. 199 00:08:51,447 --> 00:08:54,249 Well well well, look who's here. 200 00:08:55,486 --> 00:08:58,155 - You don't remember me? - No. 201 00:08:58,189 --> 00:08:59,923 I'm the idiot who asked you 202 00:08:59,957 --> 00:09:03,527 to look after my computer yesterday, remember? 203 00:09:03,562 --> 00:09:06,764 - Yeah. So where is it? - You didn't get that back? 204 00:09:06,799 --> 00:09:09,099 No, I didn't get it back. Why am I asking you? 205 00:09:09,134 --> 00:09:12,237 I didn't get it back and it's gone and so were you. 206 00:09:12,271 --> 00:09:13,872 You were taking such a long time. 207 00:09:13,907 --> 00:09:16,409 I had to get going and I gave it to someone. 208 00:09:16,443 --> 00:09:18,178 - Who did you give it to? - I don't know. 209 00:09:18,212 --> 00:09:21,147 - I gave it to some black guy. - You gave it to some black guy? 210 00:09:21,182 --> 00:09:23,918 - Yeah. - You gave it to a black guy?! 211 00:09:28,824 --> 00:09:32,660 Because that's-- I mean-- 212 00:09:32,696 --> 00:09:36,032 What I was about to say was 213 00:09:36,066 --> 00:09:38,834 why wouldn't you give it to a black person? 214 00:09:38,869 --> 00:09:42,038 In fact, that day when we were in there, 215 00:09:42,072 --> 00:09:44,175 I had been looking for a black person 216 00:09:44,209 --> 00:09:46,010 to leave my computer with. 217 00:09:46,044 --> 00:09:47,678 I didn't see one, so I left it with you. 218 00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:49,347 Left it with me. Good good. 219 00:09:49,381 --> 00:09:51,216 I'm sure it's gonna turn up. 220 00:09:51,251 --> 00:09:53,820 - I'll keep my eyes peeled for him. - I'm gonna go in. 221 00:09:53,853 --> 00:09:56,755 - He's probably dropped it off in there. - Probably dropped it off. 222 00:09:56,791 --> 00:09:58,458 - Take care. - Okay. 223 00:09:58,492 --> 00:10:00,661 Leon: Larry! ( Laughs ) 224 00:10:00,695 --> 00:10:02,796 What up, man? 225 00:10:02,830 --> 00:10:06,066 Oh, uh... nothing. 226 00:10:06,101 --> 00:10:09,005 - Who's that dude, man? - Well, I mean it's not a big deal. 227 00:10:09,039 --> 00:10:11,673 He gave me his computer to watch... 228 00:10:11,708 --> 00:10:13,476 - Uh-huh. - ...And I had to leave. 229 00:10:13,510 --> 00:10:15,345 And I gave it to this guy 230 00:10:15,380 --> 00:10:17,982 and he never gave the computer back. 231 00:10:18,016 --> 00:10:19,382 Who the fuck did you give it to? 232 00:10:19,417 --> 00:10:21,484 It was a guy. Not important. 233 00:10:21,519 --> 00:10:25,089 Who the fuck did you give it to? 234 00:10:25,124 --> 00:10:26,725 A black guy. 235 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:29,527 - Wow. - I'm sorry. 236 00:10:29,562 --> 00:10:31,330 - God damn. - I didn't want to tell you. 237 00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:33,365 - A fuckin' black dude in there-- - You forced it out of me. 238 00:10:33,399 --> 00:10:35,000 I feel fuckin' bad now. Know what I mean? 239 00:10:35,034 --> 00:10:36,502 You trusted that black motherfucker. 240 00:10:36,536 --> 00:10:37,903 - You know what I'm saying? - Yeah. 241 00:10:37,937 --> 00:10:39,671 I don't want you thinking that shit about me, 242 00:10:39,706 --> 00:10:40,705 you understand? 243 00:10:40,740 --> 00:10:42,207 I could've stole this motherfucker... 244 00:10:42,241 --> 00:10:43,841 Plenty of times, but I didn't. 245 00:10:43,876 --> 00:10:45,878 I know the code to the fuckin' house and shit. 246 00:10:45,912 --> 00:10:47,580 3948, right? The last four 247 00:10:47,614 --> 00:10:49,615 of your social security card number is 4938. 248 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:50,817 All you did was change it around. 249 00:10:50,851 --> 00:10:52,052 All that shit I fuckin' know. 250 00:10:52,086 --> 00:10:53,720 Remember that time you gave me the ATM card 251 00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:55,223 to get gas for the car and shit? 252 00:10:55,257 --> 00:10:56,526 And your signature-- Come on. 253 00:10:56,560 --> 00:10:58,328 It's a big L. It's real clear, right? 254 00:10:58,362 --> 00:11:00,198 Then the "arry David" is sloppy. 255 00:11:00,232 --> 00:11:03,568 Any man can do that shit. Your mom's maiden name-- Ratner. You know what I mean? 256 00:11:03,602 --> 00:11:06,038 - All they wanna know is that part. - Where are the car keys? 257 00:11:06,072 --> 00:11:08,040 - Inside the car. - I'll drive. 258 00:11:08,074 --> 00:11:10,209 Who the fuck told you my mother's maiden name?! 259 00:11:10,244 --> 00:11:12,144 - I must've overheard it. - You're going through my shit! 260 00:11:12,179 --> 00:11:13,514 There's shit laying around the house! 261 00:11:13,548 --> 00:11:15,916 Where the fuck did you find out my mother's maiden... 262 00:11:15,950 --> 00:11:18,418 ( Doorbell rings ) 263 00:11:20,255 --> 00:11:22,857 - Oh, hi. - Hello. 264 00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:24,826 I'm your neighbor Margaret. 265 00:11:24,861 --> 00:11:26,529 Actually, I'm realizing now 266 00:11:26,562 --> 00:11:28,597 - that we've run into each other before. - The supermarket. 267 00:11:28,631 --> 00:11:31,199 Oh yeah, that was kind of an awkward thing there. 268 00:11:31,234 --> 00:11:33,035 I was just trying to get some ice cream. 269 00:11:33,069 --> 00:11:35,338 - I understand that. I understand that. - Chubby hubby. 270 00:11:35,372 --> 00:11:39,209 You wouldn't move over. It was odd. 271 00:11:39,244 --> 00:11:41,545 Well, there was a little more to it than that. 272 00:11:41,579 --> 00:11:43,580 I know the woman was crying. I saw that. 273 00:11:43,614 --> 00:11:44,882 - Right, yeah. - But still, 274 00:11:44,916 --> 00:11:47,084 she could have cried a foot or two over. 275 00:11:47,119 --> 00:11:48,586 You see, the reason she was crying 276 00:11:48,620 --> 00:11:51,656 is she's a new member of our safe house 277 00:11:51,691 --> 00:11:53,559 that I'm the housemother for. 278 00:11:53,594 --> 00:11:54,761 - Safe house? - Yes. 279 00:11:54,795 --> 00:11:56,263 Some people call them battered women. 280 00:11:56,297 --> 00:11:58,364 - I choose not to use that phrase. - Oh, they're battered. 281 00:11:58,399 --> 00:11:59,867 I think it's very pejorative. 282 00:11:59,901 --> 00:12:02,736 - So anyway-- - Oh, where's the house? 283 00:12:02,737 --> 00:12:05,305 - It's just a couple of doors down. - Seriously? 284 00:12:06,843 --> 00:12:09,044 And speaking of those women, a couple of days ago 285 00:12:09,078 --> 00:12:11,414 I think there was a little incident 286 00:12:11,449 --> 00:12:13,016 with one of our members and her dog. 287 00:12:13,050 --> 00:12:15,853 She's also part of the sorority over there? 288 00:12:15,887 --> 00:12:17,622 Well, we don't call it a sorority. 289 00:12:17,656 --> 00:12:20,225 - But yes, she is one of our members. - Oh my God. 290 00:12:20,259 --> 00:12:23,262 And Saundra was so upset when she came home. 291 00:12:23,297 --> 00:12:25,130 - She was upset? - Yes. 292 00:12:25,166 --> 00:12:27,267 Her dog pooped all over my lawn three times. 293 00:12:27,301 --> 00:12:29,336 She doesn't clean it up. She doesn't bring bag. 294 00:12:29,370 --> 00:12:32,138 What we would love as neighbors and friends-- 295 00:12:32,173 --> 00:12:35,009 To invite you in to start a discussion. 296 00:12:35,043 --> 00:12:38,480 And you can talk to Karen and you can talk to Saundra 297 00:12:38,514 --> 00:12:40,549 and you can bring up your issues 298 00:12:40,584 --> 00:12:42,451 and perhaps apologize... 299 00:12:42,485 --> 00:12:44,954 - Apologize? - .For any discomfort you caused them. 300 00:12:44,988 --> 00:12:46,388 I don't know why I would apologize. 301 00:12:46,423 --> 00:12:48,291 - I didn't really do anything. - Well-- 302 00:12:48,326 --> 00:12:50,695 - All I want to do is buy some ice cream. - I know. 303 00:12:50,729 --> 00:12:53,999 - All I want to do is have a clean lawn... - I understand. 304 00:12:54,033 --> 00:12:55,735 - ...Without poop on it. - Exactly. 305 00:12:55,769 --> 00:12:57,170 I didn't really do anything. 306 00:12:57,204 --> 00:12:59,072 And you know what would be wonderful, Larry? 307 00:12:59,107 --> 00:13:02,677 Is that so many of the women have a negative connotation 308 00:13:02,711 --> 00:13:05,814 - as far as a male perspective goes. - Of course, yes. 309 00:13:05,849 --> 00:13:07,817 So it would be so great 310 00:13:07,852 --> 00:13:11,455 to have a safe man in their midst 311 00:13:11,490 --> 00:13:13,525 that could give them a male perspective 312 00:13:13,559 --> 00:13:15,560 that they could feel good about hearing. 313 00:13:15,595 --> 00:13:18,565 So I would be representing men. 314 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:20,500 In a safe place, yes. 315 00:13:20,535 --> 00:13:23,905 - What do you say? - I'm happy to be the male representative. 316 00:13:23,939 --> 00:13:25,974 Oh my goodness, that's wonderful. 317 00:13:26,008 --> 00:13:28,145 Maybe I could drum up a date over there, huh? 318 00:13:28,179 --> 00:13:31,715 Oh, now Larry, let's remember boundaries. 319 00:13:31,750 --> 00:13:34,954 Hi. A little bit of a surprise for all of you. 320 00:13:34,988 --> 00:13:39,259 - I'd like to introduce our neighbor and friend Larry. - Hello. 321 00:13:39,293 --> 00:13:41,328 What a great pleasure to meet you all. 322 00:13:41,363 --> 00:13:44,432 By the way, very nice house, if you don't mind my saying. 323 00:13:44,467 --> 00:13:46,402 - Beautiful. - Margaret: Isn't it nice? 324 00:13:46,436 --> 00:13:48,170 I don't know where you were living before, 325 00:13:48,204 --> 00:13:50,507 but I would think this probably would be a step up. 326 00:13:50,541 --> 00:13:52,576 You hit the jackpot with this place, huh? 327 00:13:52,610 --> 00:13:55,447 You know what, Larry? Thank you for admiring our home. 328 00:13:55,481 --> 00:13:58,017 You're really hitting the cake here, huh? And donuts? 329 00:13:58,052 --> 00:13:59,986 You're welcome to help yourself. 330 00:14:00,020 --> 00:14:01,989 I hope you guys are working out eating this-- 331 00:14:02,024 --> 00:14:03,692 My father would call this crap. 332 00:14:03,726 --> 00:14:05,327 - ( Laughs ) - That's a lot of crap. 333 00:14:05,361 --> 00:14:09,199 Larry, I think you might remember our friend Saundra. 334 00:14:09,234 --> 00:14:11,101 - A pleasure. - Hi. 335 00:14:11,136 --> 00:14:13,338 Did you have anything you wanted to say to Saundra? 336 00:14:13,372 --> 00:14:15,607 I do have something I'd like to say. 337 00:14:15,642 --> 00:14:18,878 First off, I want to apologize 338 00:14:18,879 --> 00:14:22,483 if I hurt your feelings in any way 339 00:14:22,517 --> 00:14:25,119 as a result I want of the dog pooping. 340 00:14:25,154 --> 00:14:26,454 I was just going to say 341 00:14:26,488 --> 00:14:29,391 th your anger is your problem 342 00:14:29,426 --> 00:14:31,461 and it's not my problem anymore. 343 00:14:31,495 --> 00:14:33,763 - Huh, interesting. - Okay, but it really was great 344 00:14:33,798 --> 00:14:37,803 that Larry acknowledged your feelings and apologized. 345 00:14:37,837 --> 00:14:41,509 - I guess, yeah. - Hmm, she doesn't seem to be too overwhelmed by it. 346 00:14:41,543 --> 00:14:42,977 But you know what? 347 00:14:43,011 --> 00:14:46,749 I feel very good about that interaction and-- 348 00:14:46,783 --> 00:14:49,886 It's just that dogs don't really have control of when they go. 349 00:14:49,921 --> 00:14:52,122 Yeah, but the owner has control of where the dog goes. 350 00:14:52,156 --> 00:14:54,493 - Right. You know what? - Do you want to apologize to my dog? 351 00:14:54,527 --> 00:14:56,261 Because you really yelled at my dog. 352 00:14:56,295 --> 00:14:58,665 Yeah, it's very hard to apologize to a dog 353 00:14:58,700 --> 00:15:00,768 because they're a stupid animal. 354 00:15:00,803 --> 00:15:02,471 You know, okay, ain-- 355 00:15:02,505 --> 00:15:04,840 We're going to move on down the couch. 356 00:15:04,874 --> 00:15:08,278 And I think you may also remember Karen. 357 00:15:08,312 --> 00:15:09,780 Larry: Karen! 358 00:15:09,815 --> 00:15:12,517 I would just like to apologize to you as well 359 00:15:12,551 --> 00:15:15,721 if I made you uncomfortable in any way at the market... 360 00:15:15,756 --> 00:15:17,390 You did. It's okay. 361 00:15:17,425 --> 00:15:21,228 - Wow. - ...When you were bawling in front of the refrigerator. 362 00:15:21,262 --> 00:15:24,333 I have no problem with crying in a grocery store. 363 00:15:24,366 --> 00:15:26,468 - I was very upset. - I know, I see. 364 00:15:26,502 --> 00:15:29,573 I would suggest, however, that the next time 365 00:15:29,607 --> 00:15:31,610 you feel overwhelmed by something 366 00:15:31,643 --> 00:15:33,477 to go to a different section, 367 00:15:33,513 --> 00:15:36,816 a section that's not used as much as the ice cream 368 00:15:36,850 --> 00:15:38,451 which gets a lot of action. 369 00:15:38,485 --> 00:15:41,122 I would go maybe to the-- Where the Japanese food is. 370 00:15:41,156 --> 00:15:43,058 The hoisin sauce I don't think is a big-- 371 00:15:43,092 --> 00:15:44,592 It's not like buying ice cream. 372 00:15:44,627 --> 00:15:46,929 - It's a different-- - Margaret: Again, I am going to say 373 00:15:46,964 --> 00:15:48,365 we're going to concentrate 374 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:50,567 on the positive part of what you had to say. 375 00:15:50,602 --> 00:15:52,571 - So-- - Who's that one? 376 00:15:52,605 --> 00:15:54,706 - That is Dale. She's one of our members. - Dale? 377 00:15:54,741 --> 00:15:56,174 - Yes. - Wow. 378 00:15:56,209 --> 00:15:58,077 Why don't you finish what you were saying to Karen? 379 00:15:58,111 --> 00:16:00,046 What a bovine she is, huh? 380 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:01,916 - Jesus. - Well, okay, so-- 381 00:16:01,950 --> 00:16:03,418 She's like the capo here, huh? 382 00:16:03,453 --> 00:16:05,355 No. No, she's not, Larry. 383 00:16:05,389 --> 00:16:07,088 Does she run the show? Tell me the truth. 384 00:16:07,124 --> 00:16:10,093 No, she doesn't. Nobody runs the show. 385 00:16:10,127 --> 00:16:13,864 Is this the inspirational speaker that we're getting? 386 00:16:13,898 --> 00:16:16,134 No, that's next week. 387 00:16:16,168 --> 00:16:19,038 This is our friend and neighbor Larry. 388 00:16:19,072 --> 00:16:21,674 Oh my God. What happened to you? 389 00:16:21,709 --> 00:16:24,412 We are again going to stay in the present moment, 390 00:16:24,446 --> 00:16:26,748 - being grateful and being... - Inspirational speaker? 391 00:16:26,783 --> 00:16:28,818 - ...Happy. - What in the fuck is she talking about? 392 00:16:28,852 --> 00:16:30,720 We have somebody coming in next week. 393 00:16:30,755 --> 00:16:33,723 And I think she just got confused. 394 00:16:33,758 --> 00:16:35,727 - But instead-- - Yeah, I could see that. 395 00:16:35,761 --> 00:16:38,129 - Margaret: Um, now-- - The washing machine's fucked. 396 00:16:38,165 --> 00:16:39,698 Thank you, Dale. 397 00:16:39,733 --> 00:16:42,566 That darn washing machine. I'll tell you, we-- 398 00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:45,971 We use it so much, as you can imagine, with all of our members. 399 00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,174 I'll tell you what I'll do for you. 400 00:16:48,207 --> 00:16:50,410 If you need a machine, you're welcome to come 401 00:16:50,445 --> 00:16:52,412 and use my machine anytime you want. 402 00:16:52,446 --> 00:16:53,880 - Oh my goodness. - How about that? 403 00:16:53,915 --> 00:16:56,350 - Wow. Oh, is that generous. - Huh huh? 404 00:16:56,384 --> 00:16:58,753 - That is incredible. - Isn't that a beautiful gesture? 405 00:16:58,787 --> 00:17:01,356 - That is great. - Give me a little round of applause if you want to. 406 00:17:01,390 --> 00:17:02,992 It won't kill you. Go ahead. 407 00:17:03,026 --> 00:17:05,194 Margaret: That would be fine. Sure. Why not? 408 00:17:05,229 --> 00:17:07,398 - You deserve that. - That's kind of tepid. 409 00:17:07,433 --> 00:17:10,735 - Anyway, thank you. That was very kind of you. - You're welcome. 410 00:17:10,768 --> 00:17:13,204 How about the marm here, huh? How about this marm? 411 00:17:13,238 --> 00:17:15,073 Okay, well-- That's all right, Larry. 412 00:17:15,107 --> 00:17:16,808 - How about this marm? - Okay, thank you. 413 00:17:16,843 --> 00:17:19,445 - Margaret: I think that I'm just gonna say goodbye. - Okay. 414 00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:22,381 If you touch it it's yours. 415 00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:24,650 ( Laughing ) Again, thank you, Larry. 416 00:17:24,684 --> 00:17:26,653 Thank you so much. 417 00:17:26,687 --> 00:17:29,022 Ladies, I'm just going to walk our guest to the door. 418 00:17:29,057 --> 00:17:31,391 - Mm, krispy kreme? - Oh yeah yeah. 419 00:17:31,425 --> 00:17:33,226 And thank you so much. Okay. 420 00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:35,463 - This fuckin' thing is unbelievable! - All right, okay. 421 00:17:35,497 --> 00:17:37,431 Larry, thank you again for coming by. 422 00:17:37,465 --> 00:17:39,067 Couldn't be happier. 423 00:17:40,236 --> 00:17:42,471 Did you put one of these disgusting things 424 00:17:42,505 --> 00:17:44,072 back in here after eating it? 425 00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:45,574 I might have. I have bad manners. 426 00:17:45,609 --> 00:17:47,876 There's a whole side dish here for the remnants. 427 00:17:47,911 --> 00:17:50,279 - This is the remnant plate. - Hello, boys. 428 00:17:50,314 --> 00:17:51,548 - Hi, beautiful. - Hi. 429 00:17:51,582 --> 00:17:53,284 - Oh! - Oh hi. 430 00:17:53,318 --> 00:17:55,386 - Hello. - I am so happy. 431 00:17:55,420 --> 00:17:56,720 I just came from the doctor 432 00:17:56,754 --> 00:17:58,689 and the mole is absolutely fine. 433 00:17:58,725 --> 00:18:01,059 - Fantastic! You see that? - Stella: I know, I know. 434 00:18:01,093 --> 00:18:02,727 - I knew. - That's good. 435 00:18:02,762 --> 00:18:04,796 - Believe me, I knew all along. - I was so worried for a while. 436 00:18:04,830 --> 00:18:06,265 I'm very happy for you. 437 00:18:06,299 --> 00:18:08,100 Although if you told me that it wasn't fine, 438 00:18:08,134 --> 00:18:10,338 I still would have been happy because I would have said, 439 00:18:10,372 --> 00:18:12,640 "see? Good thing I told you to go to the doctor." 440 00:18:12,675 --> 00:18:15,510 And something happened when I saw the doctor. 441 00:18:15,545 --> 00:18:17,947 I started talking about how much pain 442 00:18:17,981 --> 00:18:20,584 I'm always in with my boobs... 443 00:18:20,619 --> 00:18:23,121 - What do you mean pain? - ...And that I get these backaches. 444 00:18:23,156 --> 00:18:26,125 And I've decided that I-- 445 00:18:26,159 --> 00:18:29,864 I'm going to get my breasts reduced. 446 00:18:29,898 --> 00:18:32,969 - You're going to what? - I'm going to get them reduced. 447 00:18:34,372 --> 00:18:36,239 - That's-- - ( Laughing ) What? 448 00:18:36,274 --> 00:18:37,974 - She's hilarious. - That's funny. 449 00:18:38,010 --> 00:18:39,411 - That's funny. - Stella: No. 450 00:18:39,444 --> 00:18:42,649 - That's a good joke. - I'm serious. Yeah. 451 00:18:42,682 --> 00:18:44,316 - Really? - Yeah. 452 00:18:44,352 --> 00:18:45,853 I get backaches all the time. 453 00:18:45,886 --> 00:18:47,855 It's really really painful. 454 00:18:47,889 --> 00:18:49,525 You take an advil for that stuff. 455 00:18:49,559 --> 00:18:51,560 You throw a couple of stones behind your brassiere. 456 00:18:51,595 --> 00:18:53,297 - You just even it out. - What's the big deal? 457 00:18:53,331 --> 00:18:54,499 - Oh my God. - Like a seesaw. 458 00:18:54,533 --> 00:18:56,301 Okay, boys, you obviously don't understand. 459 00:18:56,336 --> 00:18:59,039 Imagine you had huge balls. 460 00:18:59,073 --> 00:19:00,541 - Yeah? - Balls? 461 00:19:00,575 --> 00:19:02,845 Enormous, sweaty, just filled with spunk-- 462 00:19:02,879 --> 00:19:04,715 You're comparing breasts with balls? 463 00:19:04,749 --> 00:19:07,452 People hate balls. Balls are reviled. 464 00:19:07,486 --> 00:19:10,523 You can't even mention balls and breasts in the same breath. 465 00:19:10,558 --> 00:19:13,228 - Of course you can. Balls are male boobs. - What? 466 00:19:13,262 --> 00:19:14,996 Balls are disgusting they're hideous. 467 00:19:15,031 --> 00:19:17,935 Everybody wants to see those. Who wants to see balls? 468 00:19:17,970 --> 00:19:19,270 - Right. - People want to see those. 469 00:19:19,305 --> 00:19:20,739 - Sorry. - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 470 00:19:20,773 --> 00:19:23,043 Wow, I am talking to two schoolboys right now. 471 00:19:23,077 --> 00:19:25,446 - How much are you planning on taking off? - Maybe half. 472 00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:27,517 - Half? Did you say half? - I'll be able to go jogging. 473 00:19:27,551 --> 00:19:29,619 - Half? - Half, yeah. 474 00:19:29,653 --> 00:19:31,956 You don't just love me for my tits, do you? 475 00:19:31,990 --> 00:19:35,595 ( Stuttering ) Larry, please, do I have to defend myself in this? 476 00:19:35,629 --> 00:19:38,901 Hold it, hold it. There's many things you can say about this guy. 477 00:19:38,935 --> 00:19:39,901 - But not that. - Not that. 478 00:19:39,935 --> 00:19:41,236 - Thank you. - Right right right. 479 00:19:41,270 --> 00:19:43,873 How could you even suggest that I would think that? 480 00:19:43,908 --> 00:19:46,977 Look, you hurt the man. You hurt the man. 481 00:19:47,012 --> 00:19:48,647 Look at him. It's insulting. 482 00:19:48,681 --> 00:19:51,017 - As his friend I'm insulted. - Okay, sorry. 483 00:19:51,051 --> 00:19:53,087 - I just, you know-- - Listen, we'll discuss this. 484 00:19:53,121 --> 00:19:56,258 I'm there for you, regardless of what you have to do, because I love you. 485 00:19:56,292 --> 00:19:58,562 - Everything will be fine. - I'm so happy you're so supportive! 486 00:19:58,596 --> 00:20:00,498 Thank you, sweetie. I'm just going to the loo, okay? 487 00:20:00,533 --> 00:20:02,901 - Back in a sec. - You're the woman of my dreams, 488 00:20:02,935 --> 00:20:04,637 for Christ's sake. 489 00:20:04,672 --> 00:20:06,307 - You fucking idiot. - What? 490 00:20:06,341 --> 00:20:08,176 You did this. You're responsible for this. 491 00:20:08,210 --> 00:20:10,412 You looked at her mole with a goddamn telescope 492 00:20:10,446 --> 00:20:12,782 like Galileo jerking off from 40' away. 493 00:20:12,817 --> 00:20:14,452 I had breast vision, I told you. 494 00:20:14,486 --> 00:20:16,520 Because of you I'm going to lose this beautiful woman 495 00:20:16,555 --> 00:20:18,390 with that figure, with those boobs. 496 00:20:18,425 --> 00:20:21,361 - I thought you didn't care about her breasts. - All right, I lied. 497 00:20:21,396 --> 00:20:23,764 What am I supposed to do now? Go from a double D to a-- 498 00:20:23,799 --> 00:20:27,136 - What's half of double d? - B+? No, B-. 499 00:20:27,171 --> 00:20:29,405 B-. It's closer to the D, yes. 500 00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:31,142 What's closer to the D, the minus or the plus? 501 00:20:31,176 --> 00:20:32,476 I don't give a shit, quite frankly. 502 00:20:32,511 --> 00:20:34,113 This is not algebra. This is my life. 503 00:20:34,147 --> 00:20:37,217 - Life is short. How dare she? - How dare she? 504 00:20:37,251 --> 00:20:39,487 Yeah, what gives her the right? It's self-centered. 505 00:20:39,522 --> 00:20:41,057 - It really is. - It is selfish. 506 00:20:41,092 --> 00:20:42,459 - Isn't it? - Totally. 507 00:20:42,493 --> 00:20:44,661 Larry: She's getting half of it taken off. 508 00:20:44,696 --> 00:20:46,029 Reduce them by half. 509 00:20:46,064 --> 00:20:47,998 There shouldn't be a motherfucker cutting titties down. 510 00:20:48,033 --> 00:20:49,865 You don't fuckin' wanna reduce your titties by half 511 00:20:49,900 --> 00:20:51,567 and expect a motherfucker to be happy with that shit. 512 00:20:51,601 --> 00:20:54,066 - You know what I'm saying? - I do. 513 00:20:54,100 --> 00:20:56,601 - I do know what you're saying. - You know what I'm saying? 514 00:20:56,636 --> 00:20:58,470 Why do you keep asking me that? I know what you're saying. 515 00:20:58,505 --> 00:20:59,937 Sometimes you don't know what the fuck I'm saying. 516 00:20:59,972 --> 00:21:01,172 I know what the fuck you're saying. 517 00:21:01,206 --> 00:21:02,773 I explain it to you and you don't fucking get it. 518 00:21:02,807 --> 00:21:04,640 I get it. You want to give me a test on it? 519 00:21:04,674 --> 00:21:06,174 You like fucking full titties or half titties? 520 00:21:06,208 --> 00:21:07,842 You got two half titties, right? 521 00:21:07,876 --> 00:21:09,777 - Know no better. - All right, you know what? 522 00:21:09,812 --> 00:21:11,546 We could talk till we're blue in the face. 523 00:21:11,581 --> 00:21:13,347 I don't mean that as a racial thing either. 524 00:21:13,382 --> 00:21:15,247 Would I ever turn fucking blue? 525 00:21:15,282 --> 00:21:16,982 - It's an expression. - Who turns fuckin' blue? 526 00:21:17,016 --> 00:21:19,318 You say that to white people too. You can't turn blue? 527 00:21:19,352 --> 00:21:22,153 - Hell no I can't turn blue. - Blacks blush. You blush? 528 00:21:22,187 --> 00:21:24,321 - Blacks don't fuckin' blush. - You never saw a black blush. 529 00:21:24,356 --> 00:21:26,322 Never seen a black blush in my fuckin' life. 530 00:21:26,357 --> 00:21:27,991 Blacks don't fuckin' blush. 531 00:21:29,793 --> 00:21:32,496 - Hey, Laura. - Hey, Larry. 532 00:21:32,531 --> 00:21:35,032 - Thank you so much. We really appreciate it. - You're very welcome. 533 00:21:35,066 --> 00:21:36,699 - Did you use the downey? - Yes, I did. 534 00:21:36,733 --> 00:21:39,702 - Hi, Dale. - Hey. 535 00:21:43,140 --> 00:21:44,941 - Wow. - Huh? 536 00:21:44,975 --> 00:21:46,810 - Whew. - Did you get a load of that one? 537 00:21:46,844 --> 00:21:48,579 - Yo, she's something else, man. - Isn't she? 538 00:21:48,614 --> 00:21:49,880 - Who could fuck her up? - I know. 539 00:21:49,915 --> 00:21:51,348 Me and you couldn't take that bitch. 540 00:21:51,383 --> 00:21:53,519 She must have made up a story or something to get in there. 541 00:21:53,553 --> 00:21:56,055 I bet she heard about it from a friend in there. 542 00:21:56,090 --> 00:21:58,758 And my guess is she's living in some dump 543 00:21:58,792 --> 00:22:00,192 and decided to move over. 544 00:22:00,227 --> 00:22:02,296 Gotta find out what the fuck the story is. 545 00:22:02,330 --> 00:22:04,197 I'm going to find out right now. 546 00:22:05,401 --> 00:22:07,403 Shit. 547 00:22:09,305 --> 00:22:12,075 - ( Knocks ) - Yoohoo! 548 00:22:12,109 --> 00:22:14,811 - How's the laundry coming along? - It's coming along. 549 00:22:14,845 --> 00:22:16,781 - Huh? Coming along? - Yeah. 550 00:22:16,816 --> 00:22:20,384 - You ever ice skate? - No. 551 00:22:20,419 --> 00:22:22,755 Maybe I'll take you ice skating sometime. 552 00:22:22,789 --> 00:22:25,726 - That'd be fun. - I guess. 553 00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:28,728 So, Dale, if you don't mind my saying, 554 00:22:28,763 --> 00:22:32,734 with all due respect, I was just wondering 555 00:22:32,768 --> 00:22:36,105 how you kind of... 556 00:22:36,139 --> 00:22:38,741 You know, wound up over there. 557 00:22:38,776 --> 00:22:42,279 Because it looks like you could... 558 00:22:42,313 --> 00:22:43,747 Take care of yourself. 559 00:22:43,782 --> 00:22:47,553 - It's none of your business. - Ah, okay. 560 00:22:48,655 --> 00:22:51,857 Because the thing about it is that 561 00:22:51,892 --> 00:22:55,662 I just don't see anybody taking you down. 562 00:22:56,597 --> 00:22:57,631 Ahh! 563 00:22:57,665 --> 00:22:59,800 ( Thuds ) 564 00:23:02,504 --> 00:23:04,138 That is some shiner you got there. 565 00:23:04,172 --> 00:23:05,306 Can you tell me how it happened? 566 00:23:05,341 --> 00:23:10,378 I was home and I was talking to somebody. 567 00:23:10,412 --> 00:23:15,885 And... I said something I shouldn't have said. 568 00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:18,354 So this person struck you? 569 00:23:18,388 --> 00:23:22,159 No. I fell. 570 00:23:22,193 --> 00:23:24,629 Yeah, I fell. I'm clumsy. 571 00:23:24,663 --> 00:23:27,431 I'm really clumsy. I trip all the time. 572 00:23:27,465 --> 00:23:30,336 But, you know, I kind of-- 573 00:23:30,370 --> 00:23:32,237 I deserved it actually. 574 00:23:32,271 --> 00:23:34,072 - I was wrong. - Leon: Larry. 575 00:23:34,106 --> 00:23:38,177 - Excuse me, we're-- - I need some money. 576 00:23:38,211 --> 00:23:40,346 You need money? I gave you $40 yesterday. 577 00:23:40,381 --> 00:23:42,215 - What for? - I'm fuckin' hungry waiting around 578 00:23:42,250 --> 00:23:43,416 all this fuckin' time and shit. 579 00:23:43,451 --> 00:23:45,219 Can't you see I'm in pain here? 580 00:23:45,253 --> 00:23:46,821 I know. I'm sorry. 581 00:23:46,855 --> 00:23:48,322 But I'm fuckin' hungry right now. 582 00:23:48,357 --> 00:23:50,292 - What are you going to get? - Fuckin' fruit chews. 583 00:23:50,326 --> 00:23:52,094 Fruit chews? You know how bad those are for your teeth? 584 00:23:52,128 --> 00:23:53,829 You want to spend the winter in the dentist's office? 585 00:23:53,863 --> 00:23:55,564 - Put this shit on my fuckin' tab. - On your tab? 586 00:23:55,598 --> 00:23:57,233 - Yeah. - Like you're going to pay me back. 587 00:23:57,267 --> 00:23:59,569 You know I got you. Give me a few dollars. 588 00:23:59,603 --> 00:24:01,605 All right. I'll give you some. 589 00:24:01,639 --> 00:24:04,642 - I love you, Larry. - Yeah, I love you too. 590 00:24:04,676 --> 00:24:07,645 - I'm sorry, you know him? - Yeah, he lives with me. 591 00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:09,783 - You live together? - Yeah, we live together. 592 00:24:09,818 --> 00:24:11,952 Uh-huh. 593 00:24:11,987 --> 00:24:13,121 ( Pounding ) 594 00:24:15,125 --> 00:24:16,893 You know, I didn't even ask him to move in. 595 00:24:16,927 --> 00:24:18,727 He just moved in, doesn't pay any rent 596 00:24:18,761 --> 00:24:20,395 and he eats all my food. 597 00:24:20,429 --> 00:24:23,030 He knows all about me. He knows my mother's maiden name. 598 00:24:23,064 --> 00:24:24,731 I've got to get this guy out of my house. 599 00:24:24,765 --> 00:24:27,801 - It's driving me crazy. - Mr. David, is there anything 600 00:24:27,835 --> 00:24:30,470 that you'd like to tell me about this accident? 601 00:24:30,505 --> 00:24:32,606 This is completely in confidence. 602 00:24:32,641 --> 00:24:35,109 ( Banging ) 603 00:24:36,279 --> 00:24:39,614 - No, mm-mm. - Are you sure? 604 00:24:39,649 --> 00:24:42,852 - Yeah. - Okay. 605 00:24:51,535 --> 00:24:54,006 - Hello? - Larry. Lewis. 606 00:24:54,041 --> 00:24:55,877 - Hey! - Hey, how are you doing? 607 00:24:55,910 --> 00:24:57,380 Good. What's happening? 608 00:24:57,414 --> 00:25:00,719 Stella is going through with the breast reduction on Friday. 609 00:25:00,753 --> 00:25:03,591 - Oh, I am so sorry. - So on Thursday 610 00:25:03,625 --> 00:25:07,398 I'm going to throw myself and those breasts a farewell party 611 00:25:07,432 --> 00:25:09,167 like they've never seen in their lives. 612 00:25:09,201 --> 00:25:12,172 - A breast blowout. - A breast blowout. Exactly right. 613 00:25:12,206 --> 00:25:14,610 Because I'm going to go to the Biltmore downtown. 614 00:25:14,645 --> 00:25:16,180 I'm going to have all their favorite 615 00:25:16,215 --> 00:25:18,284 frozen margaritas and put flowers there. 616 00:25:18,319 --> 00:25:20,021 It's like the last time you're going to see them, 617 00:25:20,055 --> 00:25:21,756 - like going off to war. - Absolutely. 618 00:25:21,791 --> 00:25:24,496 I never went to 'nam and I feel like this is sort of like-- In a way 619 00:25:24,530 --> 00:25:26,766 - sort of the same thing for me. - All right, good luck. 620 00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:28,802 - I'll speak to you soon. - Okay. 621 00:25:35,381 --> 00:25:37,717 Oh my God, so I asked you to watch this computer for two minutes. 622 00:25:37,752 --> 00:25:40,321 I told you to give it to the guy when he comes back in, and what? 623 00:25:40,355 --> 00:25:42,458 You-- You-- 624 00:25:47,430 --> 00:25:48,797 ( snaps fingers ) 625 00:25:48,831 --> 00:25:50,898 You're not the guy. 626 00:25:50,933 --> 00:25:52,567 All right, I made a mistake. 627 00:25:52,602 --> 00:25:54,069 I thought you were somebody else. 628 00:25:54,104 --> 00:25:55,539 - Sorry. - Who did you think I was? 629 00:25:55,573 --> 00:25:58,743 I thought you were this guy who I told to watch 630 00:25:58,776 --> 00:26:01,445 this computer and... He stole it. 631 00:26:01,479 --> 00:26:04,549 Oh. So was this guy black or white? 632 00:26:04,583 --> 00:26:08,053 Pfft, happened to be black. 633 00:26:08,087 --> 00:26:11,391 So you think that all black people look alike? 634 00:26:12,559 --> 00:26:16,963 I think all computers look alike. 635 00:26:16,997 --> 00:26:19,132 ( Clicks tongue ) 636 00:26:19,167 --> 00:26:20,901 Have a nice day. 637 00:26:22,403 --> 00:26:23,770 Saundra: ...One statement. 638 00:26:23,804 --> 00:26:25,940 It's hard to make decisions in the moment. 639 00:26:25,975 --> 00:26:27,609 So buy a bunch of one thing 640 00:26:27,643 --> 00:26:29,846 and then we have a lot of one things to choose-- 641 00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,882 - Excuse me, I gotta get in here. - Sir, don't ever touch me. 642 00:26:32,917 --> 00:26:35,185 Sorry, we're from a battered women's shelter. 643 00:26:35,220 --> 00:26:39,025 Well, it looks like you could take care of yourself, honestly. 644 00:26:40,227 --> 00:26:42,395 - ( Crunches ) - Ahh! 645 00:26:48,637 --> 00:26:50,537 - Oh my God. - Hey. I know. 646 00:26:50,572 --> 00:26:52,040 It's me, Bob, from the restaurant, 647 00:26:52,074 --> 00:26:53,774 - your neighbor. - Oh my God, are you serious? 648 00:26:53,809 --> 00:26:55,710 Yes. I'm so sorry. I had to take off. 649 00:26:55,745 --> 00:26:57,479 I know you asked me to watch the computer, 650 00:26:57,514 --> 00:26:59,082 but nobody else looked trustworthy. 651 00:26:59,116 --> 00:27:00,783 I couldn't leave it there, so I took it with me 652 00:27:00,818 --> 00:27:02,219 and I figured I'd track you down. 653 00:27:02,253 --> 00:27:03,753 And now we can find the rightful owner. 654 00:27:03,787 --> 00:27:05,955 Nobody else looked trustworthy. And I thought you took it! 655 00:27:05,989 --> 00:27:08,725 - Well, I did, but I'm bringing it back. - Yeah, right. 656 00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:11,528 You know what? I gotta return some laundry to some neighbors. 657 00:27:11,562 --> 00:27:13,063 - Okay. - You got two minutes? 658 00:27:13,097 --> 00:27:15,266 - Can you wait in the house for me? - Yeah yeah, sure. 659 00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:19,537 - Make yourself at home and I'll be right back. - Okay. 660 00:27:23,542 --> 00:27:25,477 ( Knocking at door ) 661 00:27:29,215 --> 00:27:32,452 Hi, sir. We're responding to a domestic battery call. 662 00:27:32,486 --> 00:27:34,623 I don't live here. 663 00:27:34,657 --> 00:27:37,092 The owner of the house, he just left. 664 00:27:37,126 --> 00:27:39,395 Sir, you match the description of somebody who's been reported 665 00:27:39,429 --> 00:27:41,832 - for domestic battery at this address. - No no no no no. 666 00:27:41,866 --> 00:27:43,934 See, the owner, he just walked out. He'll be right back. 667 00:27:43,969 --> 00:27:45,803 Apparently you've been living here with Mr. David 668 00:27:45,838 --> 00:27:47,139 and he's been trying to get rid of you. 669 00:27:47,173 --> 00:27:48,774 It's all in the doctor's statement. 670 00:27:48,808 --> 00:27:50,977 No no no no no. Look, we can just talk to Mr. David. 671 00:27:51,012 --> 00:27:53,313 - He'll explain everything. - You won't be speaking to Mr. David. 672 00:27:53,347 --> 00:27:55,350 - He's being moved to a safe house. - What?! 673 00:27:55,385 --> 00:27:58,153 - No no! I was just returning a computer. - You're going to jail now. 674 00:27:58,188 --> 00:28:00,290 A computer. I don't live here. You're making a mistake. 675 00:28:00,324 --> 00:28:03,728 Wait for the guy to come back. He'll tell-- God damn it! 676 00:28:11,472 --> 00:28:14,874 ( Touch tones beeping ) 677 00:28:14,908 --> 00:28:16,774 - ( Ringing ) - Hello. 678 00:28:16,809 --> 00:28:18,478 Hey, Richie boy! 679 00:28:18,512 --> 00:28:21,016 How's it going? Having fun? 680 00:28:21,050 --> 00:28:24,855 ( Theme music playing ) 54815

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