Original subtitles

I feel like you're going to handle it. You like spice.

If I remember. I like spice.

That's what I'm saying. Yeah, I like spice. You'll be fine. Cut to.

This is Hot Ones Versus.

In front of these contestants is a stack of deeply personal questions.

They can either tell the truth.

Okay, now we're getting to the win. Or suffer the wrath of the last death.

Whoever eats the most wings loses.

Artois, the official beer sponsor of Hot One.

Oh, goodness.

We've known each other for nearly our entire lives.

Yeah, that's deep.

Having first met on All That when we were both 15, you will now be shown a

number of our past looks and must rate them on a scale of 1 to 10.

Okay. We just memory lane it.

Yeah.

Amazing. I remember that.

Where were we going?

That is the Good Burger premiere.

Is that the premiere?

Yeah, that's the premiere, man. Wow. Look at us, man. Man, man.

Woo. Apparently, I wasn't aware of suiting.

I just thought like a comfy shirt would get it. You know what I'm saying? They

had a collar.

This was our movie, so we can wear whatever we want. We can wear whatever

want. That's what it was. What are we going to rate? That's like an eight.

That's an eight on me. I enjoyed that. Yeah, that was our premiere. I mean,

you're sharp, though, man. It was our first movie, man.

Just throw it on the ground.

There's somebody.

There's a chicken back there.

Oh, I remember this.

Remember that. I look like I'm part of Master P's crew. You know what I'm

saying? Right. It was kind of that era.

Yeah. Like the army era. Yeah, that's like a nine, bro. Yeah, it's a nine.

chilling. You know what I'm saying? With an actual FUBU hat.

Uh -oh.

Oh, boy.

Now, that shot.

Yeah. Come on, man. All the way shot.

Okay, you look like a vampire, and I'm taking you to a Steve Harvey event.

Two vampires going to a Steve Harvey event. Going to a Steve Harvey.

Look at that. A one, two, three. Nine, ten.

A lot of buttons.

That's about a ten. We fly. That's a ten. That's a ten for the button.

I remember when we used to have to go to events, we would hit, like, the

Crenshaw Mall here. Yeah. Or Charleston Mall. Yep. You know. Come out looking

like pimps.

This is a wild card.

That's how it started. With three exclamation points.

Thanks to the enduring love for our characters, Ed and Dexter, we've been

welcoming fans to Good Burger, home of the Good Burger, and taking their orders

for over 30 years.

That's some good wordage. It is. Whoever did that, man. And let's see if we've

picked up any fast food skills along the way. We will now face off in a burger

prep challenge.

Okay. Whoever makes the most burgers before time runs out wins.

Loser eats a death wing. Okay. Now we're getting to the wings. Oh, wow.

Okay.

I mean,

but it was made.

Get on with it.

Oh, get on with it. Shout out, though.

Got to use it. With a little bit of cheese. All right, I'm just eating with

cheese. With a little bit of cheese.

You didn't make it?

I didn't make it.

Why is it so spicy?

Why is it so spicy?

That was cool, man. I like that.

I can have it? Yeah. Okay.

That's a fun little toy.

Don't take that. Oh, God.

How was it? It's reactive.

It's hot. It's reactive.

It is a hot, chemically spicy one. Oh, man.

Damn.

Are you scared?

I'm just looking. I'm like, I'm good. I'm good. Hey, I'm ready.

I'm ready.

Oh, boy.

Oh, don't do it.

Oh, it burns.

It burns. I'm trying to save you from it. Yeah, okay.

It's crazy. Okay, I'm ready. I'm ready. It's just going on and on and on. It

hasn't stopped since I ate the wings.

So you know.

Yeah. Yeah.

But. No. You got a cough?

Uh -uh.

It gets on my lips. Oh, shoot. Are they growing?

Yeah, your lips. Like a nutty professor?

Yeah. Your bottom lip is getting a little. Your lip is. Your bottom lip.

It's getting. My lip.

Oh.

Hell yeah. That ain't nothing happening.

What kind of lipstick is that?

All right.

I'll hold the Saturday Night Live record for most impressions performed on the

show.

Let's see how well you know my long list of characters. I will now perform a

series of Kenan Thompson character voices, and you must successfully

them. Oh, snap.

Miss one, and you got to eat a death wing.

Oh, shoot.

Okay, now.

Everybody, welcome to the show.

Oh, yeah.

Steve Hart. Okay, check.

Let's see. We got Mofongo.

Dolce de leche con biste.

Wasa caca con queso frito.

Oh, oh, oh.

Little Tony, what's his name?

Not Little Tony.

The baseball player, man.

Can I get baseball player?

Yeah, we'll give him that.

It's David Ortiz.

I know who Little Tony is.

Well, you know, I like going to Krispy Kreme, Taco Bell.

I like, you know. Yeah.

Okay.

Okay. This one is, uh. The monkey has a bump on his booty. Well, that's.

That is that from time to time. That's Pierre Escobar. Exactly. Yeah. He tried

to give you.

He tried to give you an escobar.

Oh. All right. The last one. Okay. All right. Here it comes.

Everybody, get on your feet.

Now, sit down.

on your feet. That homeboy with the scared straight. Yeah. The scared

joint. Yeah.

Come on. Come on, man.

Okay.

Friendship tip.

I'm going to write down my answer and you have to guess my response.

Oh, I'm uncomfortable.

Guess wrong and eat a death wing.

What is my love language?

What?

He ain't going to know that. He ain't going to know that. He not going to know

that. All the time. All the time. Touch.

Word. Gifts. Word. Information.

Did you like that face?

All right. I think.

Oh, shoot.

That's wrong.

Yeah. Touch.

I'm touching with. Well, that's good that we both touch, but I love it. I'll

touching.

I like getting hugs and kisses on the cheek, too.

That's nice.

Touch him.

Touch him.

You put a heart on that. I did put a heart because I think about words for

youth. I do. But they talking about love language in the relationship.

In the relationship.

Oh, you got two. I'm sorry.

You okay? Because your bottom lip.

It's doing something. I'm concerned.

Oh, my.

Oh, my.

Oh,

yeah. It makes me swell up, too.

Oh, that's your nail.

Oh, yeah. You know what? I think I'm going to get out of here. I'm going to

you a bath.

Good night. Good night. Good night.

Oh,

shoot. I'm next.

Oh, man.

Oh, this is funny.

Uh -oh.

Can't get it out? Uh -uh.

I'm trying not to laugh.

Friendship test.

Okay. I'm going to write down my answer. Oh. You got to guess my response.

You guess wrong, and you eat a deaf wing.

Okay.

While it was known for its sketch comedy, All That also featured an

roster of musical guests. Yes, okay. Who was my favorite All That musical act?

Ah, shoot.

Okay.

All right. I think I'm going to get a wing on this one.

And, oh, you wrote that? Mm -hmm.

That's my favorite group, but they wasn't on the show.

Our cast wasn't on there, right?

I knew it!

I'm sorry, because I know what's about to happen to you. I know.

No, I'm good, man. You know what I'm saying?

You know what I'm saying? Mm -hmm.

We love TLC.

What's up, y 'all?

It's Tiana Rezonda.

Yeah, man.

Y 'all got the music boom.

Why I got the little extra on the side there? You got a little extra bump on

I said it got an extra bump. You don't have to eat the whole thing. I don't got

to eat the whole thing? I didn't even do anything.

I didn't even. Oh.

Oh.

You going to burn with garlic.

How you feeling? I'm good.

Why is the first one so spicy?

My face absolutely knows it.

Am I crying? I'm crying.

My God, you're killing me.

Okay.

Okay.

Hot chicken.

Man, that's it.

That's spicy.

Right? It's real.

All right, everybody knows that Kel loves orange soda.

But can that passion save you from the last dab?

You must successfully identify various orange beverages by taste alone.

Oh, yeah. Miss one and eat it that way. Well, here we go.

All right. You got a keyboard in front of you if you want to use it.

Yeah.

Orange soda.

Yeah, this is going to be fun. Okay. I got to put straws in. Hand it to me. I

got you. Oh, oh.

There's straws in here.

There's a straw in there at the top. There's a straw at the top. Yes. This is

weird. Okay.

Like the touch.

That was a good call back.

Okay.

Oh, what's this?

That's like Gatorade. Very good. Very good. That's one.

I'll work out.

Okay.

I feel like this is weird. There you go. There you go. Okay, it's a small

bottle. Uh -huh.

Uh -huh. I'm packaging.

Uh -huh.

Uh -huh.

That tastes a little weird.

Vitamin C. There used to be commercials with the kids.

Oh, with Mr. Miyagi.

High C.

Yeah, kind of. Not high C, but just like, oh, good morning. Like, I'm

forward to, you know, what's in the fridge, you know? What?

Remember the commercial? They'd be like, oh, we got, you know, some purple

stuff. Sonny D.

There you go. Come on. Sonny D.

Oh, good job. Oh, thank you, brother. That wasn't Mr. Miyagi?

What happened to Mr. Miyagi?

Pat, Pat, Pat. Was he doing that in the thing? That was named Pat. Oh, no, this

is one of them, because I know the bottle feel.

This is one of them Orangina. Okay, then you skip. You got it. Is that what it's

called? You want to taste it? Do you know what it tastes like? Hey, that's

that is. Yeah, that's what that is.

All right.

Uh -uh.

That had a big crack to it.

And a little sizzle.

Okay.

Ah!

What the heck is that?

That's like mineral.

Mineral. Sparkling. Yeah.

Sparkling orange soda. Yeah, there you go.

Delta water. Delta. Yeah, yeah. Well, here's the good news. My stomach is

a lot of fructose.

Here's the good news. This is the last one. Yeah, well, talk to me then. I

already know what that is.

Okay.

That's orange soda? There it is.

There it is.

Come on, boy. You better, boy.

You made it through. That boy good, ain't it? Come on, man. You know this

thing.

Now, over the years, we have rubbed shoulders with the biggest figures in

culture. We have, huh? It was like.

Now, I'm going to hold a number of cards in my forehead containing the names of

celebrities we've crossed paths with, and you need to feed me clues to help me

guess the names. And if we fail to get through all the cards before the time

runs out, we've got to both eat a death wing. I got you on this, bro.

We about to eat this death wing, ain't we? Oh, no, no. You got it.

Okay, let's go.

Oh, um, can I say something about this person? Yeah, you just can't say their

name. Okay.

That was like charades. I couldn't talk.

I couldn't talk. I had to like do like. No, no, no. I was going to do his

mannerisms. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's easy.

You both were on Ethel and he was in the Kevin Hart roast recently.

Kevin Hart roast. There you go.

You're doing good. You're doing good. Oh, yeah.

Vital information.

Lori Beth. There you go.

Hold on. Hold on.

Basketball. A lot of basketball.

A lot of basketball.

Shaq. There you go.

I love that that's your Shaq. I know that's a bad Shaq. I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry.

I just, I played a witch in the movie. I was a witch in the movie and my sister

was great. There you go.

Sean,

who do this show, we had a really romantic time.

Together. My name rhymes with Fifi.

Oh, Kiki Palmer? Oh!

Man, so many things. I could have said so many things. She's going to be like,

Kel, what is wrong with you?

Oh, it's a favorite. We were just talking about him the other day as far

comedians, clean comedians.

Sinbad. There you go. Shout out to Sinbad, man. Yeah, man, shout out to

Oh, yeah.

Crazy hair.

She in the Kel theme song. Cool, yeah.

Yep.

Always wore Hush Puppets and the same suit on our show.

When he was very young and he used to warm up the audience.

Nick. There you go.

Nick, get it. I didn't want to say the usual, bro. Hush puppies.

Hush puppies. Hush puppies. That was the word.

Hush puppies and an old beamer.

Oh, that's our brother. That's our little brother.

So we win.

We win. I told you. I told you. I told you. I told you.

It's a tradition around here to put a little extra on the last wing. Okay.

You and your opponent can add extra dab to your final wing now.

That's the worst one. That's the worst one. Oh,

shoot.

Oh, shoot.

You put...

17 dabs. My bad.

But that was your chicken. I know, that's my chicken.

Oh, there you go.

Okay, we did the same. Three dabs. Beep, boop, beep.

Given our decades -long friendship, we see each other in ways no one else has.

Pause.

I was like, what? For our final challenge, we will draw portraits of

Whoever laughed at their opponent's work must eat it that way. Oh, man.

I can't draw at all. Got a degree in commercial arts.

Nice.

With this particular one, I'm doing like a bit of a graffiti, cartoony style.

I paint in my office. I love painting. I love art. I'm always doodling.

I do it all the time. It's just not good.

Ha!

Are you done, man?

Yeah. I can't draw.

You're going to love it. I'm done. I just did something quick.

Moment of truth. Moment of truth. And that's really good.

I win.

He won.

I'm sorry.

He won. He won. He won. I mean, is there something wrong with my mouth?

Is that a tooth?

It looked like I had a stroke.

Yeah, it's just, it's abstract.

It's just abstract.

Why are my eyes?

I got in a fight. Because I had to, I was adding, I was like, oh, I got all

these colors.

And then I started just like, you got orange ears as well. Okay.

Yeah. That's fun.

Yeah. That's a kid having a good time. Yeah, it looked like he was doing a

little something.

Oh, my face.

Oh,

that's so funny. Yeah.

That's cool. You got a little skateboard.

I should have put your name on it. Yeah. Woo.

Oh, that's funny. I got to eat that sauce, huh?

Yeah. Yeah, okay, man. Ain't no thang.

Ain't no thang but a chicken wing.

Yeah. Come on, man.

That's it. That's classic. Ain't no thang but a chicken wing. I said, ain't

thang but a chicken wing.

Oh, yeah, he getting in it.

That's right. I did. I did.

So it can't be that bad, then. No, it's not.

Wait.

That's not that bad.

It kicked in. It kicked in.

I can't talk. It kicked in later. It kicked in later.

I'm good.

That wasn't that bad.

That wasn't that bad.

I feel it in my ear.

You're handling your business. It's in your ear?

Oh, it's a tie game.

We tied? We tied, man.

Yo, why is it building up, though?

I'm trying to understand. It starts burning over time.

You want some? Get your milk. I love this. Yeah, we did a tie. No,

you did a thing. Man, I can test that. That was hot.

That was not spicy.

We have a new app.

It's a game.

We came out with a game. It's called Orange Pop. It's available.

It's free to download. It's a classic match -free game.

Thermogenic?

What is it?

Thermogenic. Don't do it. Y 'all ain't right. Don't do it.

Don't do it. Just avoid it.

Don't make no sense. Did something happen here?

Are you burnt? Because it's like, it's burning all.

You feel like your face is melting off? Yeah, I feel like, I feel like, remember

the dude in Batman that fell into the acid?

Let me try. There's just one side of his face.

Let me try mine.

Don't do that. Don't do that.

All right, there it is.

I don't want you out there, bro.

Oh, why did I do that?

I might as well pour this in, you know, and see what happens.

I'm dying to see what happens.

Just a daredevil over here. You're a madman.

That works, P.

Hey, celebs, mix it up. Mix it up. It's like a protein shake, I'm telling you.

Hot chicken.

Hey, what's going on, Hot Ones fans?

You know you can catch me every Thursday interviewing celebrities over the wings

of death.

But if you're looking for a little more Scoville -laced action, tune in Tuesdays

for Hot Ones vs.

It's the show where celebrities go head -to -head to either tell the truth or

suffer the wrath of the last dab.

So tune in Tuesdays for a front -road seat to the fiery fights and celebrity

clashes. That's Hot Ones vs.

Tuesdays on First We Feed. Don't miss it.