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1
00:00:03,336 --> 00:00:04,704
Hey,
2
00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:07,841
you ever noticed how
it's like The Beachcombers
around here?
3
00:00:07,874 --> 00:00:11,211
Yeah, if you replace the
ocean with no ocean at all,
4
00:00:11,344 --> 00:00:13,079
the similarities are eerie.
5
00:00:13,146 --> 00:00:14,748
No, no, no,
think about it.
6
00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:16,516
Uh, The Ruby is Molly's.
7
00:00:16,649 --> 00:00:19,352
So Lacey's Molly?
She's gonna love that.
8
00:00:19,386 --> 00:00:20,854
And I could be Relic.
9
00:00:20,887 --> 00:00:24,090
You could be the deadwood that
gets hauled off at the start.
10
00:00:24,157 --> 00:00:27,560
You think The Beachcombers
was the best Canadian TV show
of all time?
11
00:00:27,627 --> 00:00:29,162
I always kinda
liked Street Legal .
12
00:00:29,195 --> 00:00:31,931
Street Legal sucked!
13
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:34,534
Okay, he should be Relic.
14
00:00:36,669 --> 00:00:40,373
♪ You can tell me that
your dog ran away ♪
15
00:00:40,407 --> 00:00:43,910
♪ Then tell me that it
took three days ♪
16
00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:49,215
♪ I've heard every joke,
I've heard every one you say ♪
17
00:00:49,349 --> 00:00:53,420
♪ You think there's
not a lot goin' on ♪
18
00:00:53,553 --> 00:00:57,190
♪ Look closer, Baby,
you're so wrong ♪
19
00:00:57,223 --> 00:01:00,560
♪ And that's why you can
stay so long ♪
20
00:01:00,593 --> 00:01:04,697
♪ Where there's not a lot
goin' on ♪♪
21
00:01:09,202 --> 00:01:11,037
Darn it!
22
00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:13,540
Did you just say "Darn it"?
23
00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:15,775
What are you, one
of the Brady Bunch?
24
00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:17,444
I thought we were
the Beachcombers.
25
00:01:17,577 --> 00:01:18,945
It's a cable van.
26
00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,614
Those jerks are comin'
to disconnect my cable.
27
00:01:21,714 --> 00:01:24,084
Ooh, this is a
tough call for me.
28
00:01:24,217 --> 00:01:25,885
Whose side should I be on?
29
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:29,322
I mean, generally I dislike
the cable companies,
30
00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:31,958
but, specifically,
I dislike Hank.
31
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:34,060
It's better to
be specific.
32
00:01:35,728 --> 00:01:37,864
Fill it up?
Please.
33
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:41,201
How about I do it next Tuesday,
sometime between 8 and 4?
34
00:01:41,234 --> 00:01:43,103
That's a good one.
35
00:01:43,236 --> 00:01:44,737
Uh, I'm not a
repairman, though.
36
00:01:44,904 --> 00:01:46,606
I'm a, uh, production
technician.
37
00:01:46,706 --> 00:01:48,608
Oh. So installing,
uninstalling?
38
00:01:48,708 --> 00:01:51,744
Uh, no. Someone complained that
Dog River wasn't getting
39
00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:54,848
local access programming, so
I'm here to help produce some.
40
00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:56,850
Someone from Dog River
complained we weren't
41
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:59,119
getting enough
local access shows?
42
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,621
OSCAR:
Why are there no
shows about Dog River,
43
00:02:01,654 --> 00:02:03,189
on this stupid channel?
44
00:02:03,256 --> 00:02:05,992
I believe we're talking
with Oscar Leroy.
45
00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,094
Oscar, I've told you before.
46
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:10,930
Your question has to
be about pets.
47
00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,866
Why is this stupid
pet show on?
48
00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:15,101
I hope you get
a good welcome here.
49
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,036
People don't always like
the cable companies.
50
00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:19,105
I don't think they
really dislike us.
51
00:02:24,277 --> 00:02:26,980
Well, you'd have a better
sense of it than me.
52
00:02:28,648 --> 00:02:31,851
Hank, when are you gonna
pay for the eggs I gave you?
53
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,053
You cut off my cable,
you get egged.
54
00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:37,290
I'm gonna to cut you off
if you don't pay your tab.
55
00:02:38,124 --> 00:02:39,659
Oh, yeah?
56
00:02:39,692 --> 00:02:42,462
Well, don't be surprised
if you get egged.
57
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,000
Hey, can I borrow
some more eggs?
58
00:02:52,038 --> 00:02:53,673
This the van
that was egged?
59
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:56,309
If I had to guess.
60
00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:58,244
I want whoever
did this caught.
61
00:02:58,311 --> 00:03:01,514
Yeah? Maybe we can do it
Tuesday, between 8 and 4?
62
00:03:04,284 --> 00:03:05,685
Good one.
63
00:03:05,818 --> 00:03:07,787
Look, I don't want
any trouble here.
64
00:03:07,820 --> 00:03:11,658
I-I'm just here to put
some local people on TV.
65
00:03:11,691 --> 00:03:13,526
We'll get on this
right away.
66
00:03:16,296 --> 00:03:18,765
Ah, here's what
we got so far.
67
00:03:18,831 --> 00:03:22,835
It's called Dog River
Crimestoppers.
68
00:03:23,002 --> 00:03:24,537
Sounds okay.
69
00:03:24,671 --> 00:03:26,706
I think as senior officer,
I should probably
70
00:03:26,806 --> 00:03:28,875
be the one on camera
describing the crime?
71
00:03:29,008 --> 00:03:30,076
Makes sense.
72
00:03:30,109 --> 00:03:32,345
It's just that I have this
commanding presence
73
00:03:32,512 --> 00:03:34,547
and I really think--
I'm fine with it.
74
00:03:34,581 --> 00:03:37,450
I wish you wouldn't make
a big deal out of this.
75
00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:39,719
Davis, you can
be the one on TV.
76
00:03:39,819 --> 00:03:43,022
Fine. But I'm not diggin' your
passive aggressiveness.
77
00:03:44,257 --> 00:03:46,726
So what kinda show
does this guy want?
78
00:03:46,826 --> 00:03:49,395
Oh, it could be anything.
It's cable access.
79
00:03:49,529 --> 00:03:52,732
A knitting show,
a cooking show,
80
00:03:52,765 --> 00:03:54,534
a-a knitting show.
81
00:03:54,567 --> 00:03:57,203
Back home on our cable
station they used to put
82
00:03:57,237 --> 00:04:00,440
this video of a burning
fire log on every winter.
83
00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:02,242
A log?
84
00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:03,743
That was the show?
85
00:04:03,843 --> 00:04:05,245
Yeah.
86
00:04:05,278 --> 00:04:07,413
Oh, it was just burning.
87
00:04:07,547 --> 00:04:09,382
It was very soothing.
88
00:04:09,582 --> 00:04:11,484
WOMAN:
Turn that stupid
log off, Lacey.
89
00:04:11,584 --> 00:04:13,152
You've been watching it
all day.
90
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:16,723
MAN:
Leave it on. At least
she's keeping quiet.
91
00:04:16,756 --> 00:04:18,791
EMMA:
Sounds boring.
92
00:04:18,891 --> 00:04:20,760
What about a
knitting show?
93
00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:23,062
Okay, you gotta
let that go.
94
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:25,732
What about a talk show,
the three of us?
95
00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:28,468
Okay, now that
is a great idea.
96
00:04:28,568 --> 00:04:31,104
Three generations
of Dog River women.
97
00:04:31,137 --> 00:04:33,106
What do you mean
three generations?
98
00:04:33,239 --> 00:04:34,741
I did--well, I-I
just meant that--
99
00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:38,611
She meant we've all lived here
for different amounts of time.
100
00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:39,779
Right?
101
00:04:39,912 --> 00:04:42,181
You read my mind.
102
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,484
Okay, what kind
of talk show?
103
00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:46,452
Well, I've always
kinda liked The View .
104
00:04:46,619 --> 00:04:48,121
We could do something like that.
105
00:04:48,254 --> 00:04:49,122
Mm-hmm.
106
00:04:49,155 --> 00:04:50,757
We can call it, um...
107
00:04:53,893 --> 00:04:55,328
The View.
108
00:04:55,428 --> 00:04:57,263
That's a good name.
109
00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:58,898
Nah, nah.
110
00:04:58,931 --> 00:05:02,969
I think the people at
The View might have something
to say about that.
111
00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:05,204
Like I'm afraid of The View .
112
00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:07,307
I'll get on it right away.
113
00:05:07,340 --> 00:05:11,844
Linda, I have to sue someplace
called... Sakatchejam.
114
00:05:11,944 --> 00:05:13,913
It's in Canada or
Minnesota or somethin'.
115
00:05:13,946 --> 00:05:16,349
Look it up and get
them on the phone.
116
00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:23,189
Ignore that.
117
00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:25,658
We can come up with
the title later.
118
00:05:25,925 --> 00:05:27,327
Hey, Brent,
119
00:05:27,460 --> 00:05:28,961
I gotta confess
something.
120
00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:30,463
Do you really?
121
00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:32,332
I egged the cable van.
122
00:05:32,465 --> 00:05:34,834
So what is it with you
and egging things?
123
00:05:34,934 --> 00:05:37,203
Why reinvent the wheel?
124
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:40,139
You know, now-now
I feel guilty.
125
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:43,176
I found out he's not here
to cut off my cable.
126
00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:46,946
I feel my heart pounding,
and he's gonna hear it.
127
00:05:46,979 --> 00:05:49,716
It's gonna be like one
of them tell-tale hearts,
128
00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:52,552
you know, like in that
Edgar Allan Poe story,
129
00:05:52,685 --> 00:05:56,656
uh, what's it's called?
130
00:05:56,689 --> 00:05:59,525
The Tell-Tale Heart?
131
00:05:59,559 --> 00:06:01,994
No, I don't--
I don't think so.
132
00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:04,497
Yeah, you're right.
I just made that name up.
133
00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:07,200
I don't know, Hank, you
might get away with it.
134
00:06:07,233 --> 00:06:08,701
Fat chance.
135
00:06:08,735 --> 00:06:10,670
Cable guys know everything.
136
00:06:10,703 --> 00:06:12,739
I don't know
about that.
137
00:06:12,872 --> 00:06:14,874
But it could work, right?
138
00:06:14,974 --> 00:06:18,177
Different views,
engaging viewpoints.
139
00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:21,180
And, it's local access, so
we could call it The View.
140
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:23,015
Oh, we will sue them.
141
00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:25,518
I just can't find the place.
142
00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:29,856
It sounds like a fine show,
but I'm not the person who
makes these things happen.
143
00:06:29,889 --> 00:06:32,058
I'm just here to
supply the equipment.
144
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:34,227
Well, who decides
what show gets made?
145
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:36,396
Well, the person who
made the complaint.
146
00:06:36,429 --> 00:06:37,897
So what do you think?
147
00:06:37,930 --> 00:06:39,732
I don't know.
Where's the gotcha?
148
00:06:39,899 --> 00:06:42,235
Where's the water cooler?
149
00:06:42,268 --> 00:06:45,238
Maybe if you
had an ostrich.
150
00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:47,774
You don't talk about it,
it's just there.
151
00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:49,909
Ostrich.
152
00:06:52,545 --> 00:06:54,247
Think about it.
153
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:02,221
Can I get some take-out
coffee, please?
154
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:03,389
Yeah.
155
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:06,092
How about sometime between
8 and 4 next Tuesday?
156
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,227
Yeah, that's a good one.
157
00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:11,063
Yeah. I have a pretty unique
sense of humour, so.
158
00:07:12,532 --> 00:07:15,067
Okay. Well, I'll get you
your coffee.
159
00:07:15,234 --> 00:07:16,936
We pitched Oscar the
Crimestoppers show
160
00:07:16,969 --> 00:07:19,505
and he wanted us to put
an ostrich in.
161
00:07:19,572 --> 00:07:22,275
Maybe we could have been
more flexible about that,
162
00:07:22,308 --> 00:07:25,545
or at least considered
some kinda large bird.
163
00:07:25,578 --> 00:07:28,514
He wanted us to do the
same thing with our show.
164
00:07:28,581 --> 00:07:31,818
And then he said we should
be wearing roller skates.
165
00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:33,920
I'll get rid of Oscar.
166
00:07:33,953 --> 00:07:37,290
I can't believe you
let the cable company
trick you like this.
167
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,826
You're doing all
the work for free.
168
00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:41,594
They think they
can trick me?
169
00:07:41,794 --> 00:07:43,529
You shouldn't have
to deal with us.
170
00:07:43,596 --> 00:07:45,164
You have your
own show ideas.
171
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:47,467
I bet they think
they can trick me!
172
00:07:47,500 --> 00:07:49,502
Let them find somebody
else to trick.
173
00:07:49,602 --> 00:07:51,671
'Cause they're not
gonna trick me!
174
00:07:51,804 --> 00:07:53,172
You tryin' to trick me?
175
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:55,107
No. I just need a point person,
176
00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:56,676
someone to represent
the community.
177
00:07:56,809 --> 00:07:58,444
Just don't add
any dumb ideas.
178
00:07:58,478 --> 00:08:00,379
Karen, be flexible.
179
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:03,115
I'm sure Brent has
a lot of good ideas.
180
00:08:03,282 --> 00:08:05,117
Karen's right. No dumb ideas.
181
00:08:05,284 --> 00:08:09,121
I just listen to their
yap, yap, yap and let 'em
do their dopey shows?
182
00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:10,823
I can do that for ya.
183
00:08:10,857 --> 00:08:12,992
You can all relax.
I won't play favourites.
184
00:08:13,092 --> 00:08:14,994
You'll each get
to make your show.
185
00:08:15,027 --> 00:08:17,597
Uh, actually, just one show.
186
00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:21,000
And-and you have to pick
which one gets made.
187
00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:37,383
can really make this work.
188
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:38,885
Cheers.
189
00:08:40,152 --> 00:08:41,554
Totally unreasonable!
190
00:08:41,721 --> 00:08:43,723
You wanted to ruin
this from the start!
191
00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:45,291
You're both out
of your minds!
192
00:08:45,391 --> 00:08:46,859
I'm doing my own show!
193
00:08:46,893 --> 00:08:57,136
So am I!
So am I!
194
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:59,405
Hey, I need to talk to you.
195
00:09:00,907 --> 00:09:03,910
Uh, I-I have a friend
who egged the cable van.
196
00:09:03,976 --> 00:09:05,411
I knew it!
197
00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:08,014
I knew someone in town
egged a cable van.
198
00:09:08,047 --> 00:09:10,049
They tried to
pin it on me.
199
00:09:10,182 --> 00:09:12,084
Gave me a pretty
good goin' over.
200
00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:14,153
Did you egg a cable van?
201
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:16,422
Today? No.
202
00:09:16,489 --> 00:09:18,491
Okay. Thanks.
203
00:09:18,524 --> 00:09:20,993
I don't wanna go
through that again.
204
00:09:21,027 --> 00:09:23,529
I-I need somebody
to talk to.
205
00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:26,432
Yeah? Well, good luck finding
somebody who gives a crap.
206
00:09:26,499 --> 00:09:28,634
We have another caller.
207
00:09:28,734 --> 00:09:32,438
HANK:
Yeah, I-I got this friend
who egged a cable van.
208
00:09:32,538 --> 00:09:35,975
We only take questions
about pets.
209
00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:39,579
I have this pet who
egged a cable van.
210
00:09:39,779 --> 00:09:41,113
Hey, Brent.
211
00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:44,517
I just wanted to be the
first to tell ya that, uh,
212
00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:47,019
we're not doin' a show
together anymore.
213
00:09:47,053 --> 00:09:50,456
So, if you want the rest
of the day off,
214
00:09:50,556 --> 00:09:51,991
I could cover for ya.
215
00:09:52,058 --> 00:09:53,759
Great. Okay, thanks.
216
00:09:53,793 --> 00:09:56,963
I'll just finish this
chili cheese dog Lacey
brought over for me.
217
00:09:57,029 --> 00:10:00,700
Then I'll go to my mom's.
She washed and folded
my laundry for me.
218
00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:04,570
But, hey, thanks for being
the first to tell me about
the show thing.
219
00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:10,242
Do you think free laundry,
chili cheese dogs,
220
00:10:10,276 --> 00:10:12,345
and taking time off
is really gonna help?
221
00:10:12,478 --> 00:10:13,946
Au contraire.
222
00:10:13,980 --> 00:10:16,816
And I don't say that lightly,
or with a decent accent.
223
00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:18,818
I think it could
help a lot.
224
00:10:18,851 --> 00:10:20,586
It's just puttin'
off the inevitable.
225
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,556
You gotta face your problems
head on and--wha?
226
00:10:23,589 --> 00:10:25,791
You never saw me.
227
00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:29,195
Hey, Brent, have
you seen Hank?
228
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:31,197
I was told I haven't.
229
00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:32,832
What's that mean?
230
00:10:32,965 --> 00:10:35,735
Hey, don't hassle the man,
Karen, the man who's gonna
231
00:10:35,835 --> 00:10:37,970
pick the show that
gets produced. Okay?
232
00:10:38,004 --> 00:10:39,572
Sorry for the
trouble, sir.
233
00:10:39,605 --> 00:10:43,476
Okay. But you keep that
lunatic away from me.
234
00:10:45,845 --> 00:10:47,680
Good work,
Officer Suck-Up.
235
00:10:47,813 --> 00:10:50,716
You gotta be nicer to Brent.
I'm nice enough.
236
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:54,854
Do you have to have
your top button done up
when you talk to him?
237
00:10:55,021 --> 00:10:56,389
What are you saying?
238
00:10:56,522 --> 00:10:59,492
I'm just saying, would it
kill you to flirt with him?
239
00:11:00,126 --> 00:11:02,294
Um, yeah.
240
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:05,031
Let's just find Hank
and get this over with.
241
00:11:05,131 --> 00:11:08,134
At least take your hat off
and let your hair down.
242
00:11:11,871 --> 00:11:14,540
So, you know the log?
243
00:11:14,573 --> 00:11:17,610
Was that fire real, or
was it added digitally?
244
00:11:17,643 --> 00:11:19,111
Oh, it's real.
245
00:11:19,145 --> 00:11:22,248
But here's the crazy
thing about that log.
246
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:25,051
It was shot in July.
247
00:11:25,151 --> 00:11:26,552
Oh, wow.
248
00:11:26,652 --> 00:11:29,321
You know a lot about TV.
249
00:11:29,355 --> 00:11:32,658
Do you have
any suggestions
for a talk show?
250
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:36,729
Well, opinion's good, um,
a strong point of view.
251
00:11:36,896 --> 00:11:39,899
Have you ever seen
Coach's Corner?
252
00:11:39,932 --> 00:11:41,901
Don Cherry. Sure.
253
00:11:42,068 --> 00:11:43,869
Like Don Cherry.
254
00:11:43,903 --> 00:11:47,406
Kind of loveable, but,
uh, uh, gruff and cranky.
255
00:11:47,573 --> 00:11:49,608
Who wants to listen to
somebody spouting off?
256
00:11:49,675 --> 00:11:52,178
Yeah. That's crappy.
257
00:11:52,211 --> 00:11:54,280
What do you know about TV?
258
00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:56,148
You come here, try
and trick people,
259
00:11:56,182 --> 00:11:58,684
and then you don't even know
what's goin' on.
260
00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:01,253
Hire talented people and
let them loose with it,
261
00:12:01,387 --> 00:12:03,222
let them have fun with it.
262
00:12:03,389 --> 00:12:05,725
It's about telling stories,
263
00:12:05,891 --> 00:12:08,294
not resorting to the
lowest common denominator
264
00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:12,665
to draw people in with their
stupid rants and opinions!
265
00:12:17,603 --> 00:12:20,072
I think Karen and
Davis are on to me.
266
00:12:20,106 --> 00:12:21,941
Yeah, you'd better
hide out in here.
267
00:12:22,108 --> 00:12:24,110
They'd never think to
look in the bar.
268
00:12:24,143 --> 00:12:26,112
It's like I got no way out,
269
00:12:26,145 --> 00:12:28,280
like that movie with,
uh, Kevin Costner?
270
00:12:28,380 --> 00:12:30,216
No Way Out?
271
00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:32,218
Dances With Wolves.
272
00:12:32,251 --> 00:12:34,720
You know, he's trapped, he's
gotta protect Whitney Houston,
273
00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,756
but he's fallen in love
with her?
274
00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:39,391
He had no way out, like me.
275
00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:40,793
Right.
276
00:12:40,826 --> 00:12:43,629
Like that movie, Running Out
of Patience , starring me.
277
00:12:46,198 --> 00:12:47,833
What are you doin' here?
278
00:12:47,967 --> 00:12:52,138
Don't tell Emma, but I've
got a proposition for you.
279
00:12:52,238 --> 00:12:54,840
Hey. Emma and I sometimes fight,
280
00:12:54,974 --> 00:12:57,443
but I take my marriage vows
seriously.
281
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,245
Not that.
282
00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:01,680
Oh, God, not that!
283
00:13:01,747 --> 00:13:04,150
I wanted you to
be in my show.
284
00:13:04,216 --> 00:13:07,887
Why would I be in your show?
I can be in my own show.
285
00:13:07,987 --> 00:13:11,757
Because a good show
needs a likeable person
and a cranky one.
286
00:13:11,757 --> 00:13:14,160
And what are you
gonna be cranky about?,
287
00:13:14,226 --> 00:13:16,028
What's going on here?
288
00:13:16,162 --> 00:13:17,997
Nothing.
289
00:13:18,130 --> 00:13:19,632
I wasn't trying--
290
00:13:19,665 --> 00:13:21,667
I wasn't even--
291
00:13:21,767 --> 00:13:23,769
You're outta your mind.
292
00:13:25,671 --> 00:13:27,106
What was that about?
293
00:13:27,173 --> 00:13:30,643
Wanda wanted me to be
in her show because
I'm so damn likeable.
294
00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:32,678
You have no chemistry with her.
295
00:13:32,711 --> 00:13:36,916
You should do a show with
someone you obviously
have chemistry with.
296
00:13:37,016 --> 00:13:40,686
Sure. But why would I
do a show with Lacey?
297
00:13:40,753 --> 00:13:42,221
Hey, Hank.
298
00:13:42,288 --> 00:13:44,223
Karen and Davis are
lookin' for ya.
299
00:13:44,290 --> 00:13:46,225
Jeez, they're like a
couple a bloodhounds.
300
00:13:46,292 --> 00:13:47,760
I gotta get outta town.
301
00:13:47,793 --> 00:13:51,030
I'll see ya in a couple
weeks when this blows over.
Okay.
302
00:13:51,163 --> 00:13:52,765
Hank, we need to talk.
303
00:14:05,744 --> 00:14:06,846
Oh. Hmm.
304
00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:09,682
So we put two and two
together and thought
305
00:14:09,715 --> 00:14:12,284
that you would perfect to star
in our Crimestoppers video.
306
00:14:12,318 --> 00:14:13,819
Playin' the criminal.
307
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,387
In the re-enactment
of the crime.
308
00:14:15,487 --> 00:14:17,656
I'll be the on-air
spokesperson.
309
00:14:18,157 --> 00:14:19,692
Hey, Brent.
310
00:14:21,293 --> 00:14:24,330
Just wanted to apologize
for yesterday,
311
00:14:24,463 --> 00:14:28,000
trying to manipulate you
into picking my show.
312
00:14:28,033 --> 00:14:29,768
No problem.
313
00:14:29,802 --> 00:14:33,205
Okay, now I want to apologize
314
00:14:33,272 --> 00:14:34,874
for that insincere
apology just now.
315
00:14:35,007 --> 00:14:36,442
No problem.
316
00:14:36,508 --> 00:14:40,412
Hey, Brent, do you mind
if we shoot our TV thing
in your parking lot?
317
00:14:40,512 --> 00:14:42,014
No, go ahead.
318
00:14:42,047 --> 00:14:44,049
Strong decision, Brent.
319
00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:45,718
Gutsy.
320
00:14:48,287 --> 00:14:51,690
Oh, I don't mean, uh, guts
like you have a big gut.
321
00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:53,893
I mean-I meant, uh, uh,
lotsa guts,
322
00:14:54,026 --> 00:14:57,730
but not lots like a big gut.
323
00:14:59,064 --> 00:15:01,066
Have you lost weight?
324
00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:03,335
Karen, maybe now's
a good time to--
325
00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:07,840
You can take your pants off
if you want to.
326
00:15:07,873 --> 00:15:11,243
But just leave
me out of it.
327
00:15:13,078 --> 00:15:16,515
Ooo, it's getting
hot in here.
328
00:15:16,548 --> 00:15:20,352
Just, uh, let me know if there's
anything I can do for ya, Brent.
329
00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:28,394
So do I at least get points
for not creeping you out?
330
00:15:28,527 --> 00:15:30,095
Oh, yeah.
331
00:15:31,096 --> 00:15:32,598
Hey, Oscar.
332
00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:34,300
So listen, I have an idea.
333
00:15:34,366 --> 00:15:37,736
Why don't you and I team up
together and do a show?
334
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:39,271
It could be fun.
335
00:15:39,371 --> 00:15:40,706
No.
336
00:15:40,739 --> 00:15:44,276
Oh, come on, think about it. I
could make it worth your while.
337
00:15:44,343 --> 00:15:47,546
Lacey, chemistry
or no chemistry,
338
00:15:47,579 --> 00:15:49,381
I'm happily married.
339
00:15:49,415 --> 00:15:51,350
Oh, no. No.
340
00:15:51,383 --> 00:15:53,686
Oscar, that is
not what I meant.
341
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:55,387
And just for the record,
342
00:15:55,421 --> 00:15:58,958
that's never going to be
what I meant, ever.
343
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:01,961
Just to be clear,
never, ever.
344
00:16:02,094 --> 00:16:03,896
What's goin' on?
345
00:16:03,929 --> 00:16:05,397
I'm not sure.
346
00:16:05,431 --> 00:16:07,399
Getting mixed signals.
347
00:16:09,568 --> 00:16:11,470
Hey, thanks for the
chili cheese dog.
348
00:16:11,570 --> 00:16:13,605
Oh. Yeah, I wanted
to apologize for that.
349
00:16:13,772 --> 00:16:16,275
I know you have a
lot on your plate.
350
00:16:16,308 --> 00:16:19,979
Okay, I know. I eat too much,
I have a bit of a gut.
351
00:16:20,112 --> 00:16:22,348
What? Oh, Brent,
you listen
like your dad.
352
00:16:22,381 --> 00:16:24,817
I don't think
you have a gut.
353
00:16:24,917 --> 00:16:26,819
You comin' onto me?
354
00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:31,423
I'm Sergeant Davis Quinton.
355
00:16:31,457 --> 00:16:34,893
And welcome to Dog River
Crimestoppers.
356
00:16:34,927 --> 00:16:39,798
We're asking for your assistance
in the solving of a crime.
357
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:42,634
Take a look at this
dramatic re-enactment.
358
00:16:45,304 --> 00:16:47,339
Okay, go Hank!
359
00:16:53,479 --> 00:16:55,647
Okay, come on, put
the camera on me.
360
00:16:58,650 --> 00:17:01,153
Thanks for agreeing
to meet with me.
361
00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:02,821
What I wanted to say is,
362
00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:05,190
what's the big deal about
a cable access show?
363
00:17:05,324 --> 00:17:07,192
Last week you couldn't
have cared less.
364
00:17:07,226 --> 00:17:09,561
You guys have been fighting
and arguing so much,
365
00:17:09,661 --> 00:17:12,431
you haven't even figured out
what the show's gonna be.
366
00:17:12,464 --> 00:17:14,933
Look, TV is hard,
from what I've read,
367
00:17:14,967 --> 00:17:18,370
and seen on TV when people
talk about how hard it is.
368
00:17:18,437 --> 00:17:20,172
So what do you say?
369
00:17:20,205 --> 00:17:23,709
Can ya find a way to
work this out, please?
370
00:17:23,842 --> 00:17:26,445
I'm asking as someone who
deeply didn't even want to
371
00:17:26,478 --> 00:17:28,981
get involved in
the first place.
372
00:17:29,181 --> 00:17:30,983
Think about it.
373
00:17:35,187 --> 00:17:36,855
I'm a little embarrassed.
374
00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:38,424
Me too.
375
00:17:38,490 --> 00:17:39,858
Yeah.
376
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:41,760
Brent really has no clue.
377
00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:43,996
He can't handle talent.
378
00:17:45,998 --> 00:17:47,399
You're both goin' down.
379
00:17:47,499 --> 00:17:48,901
He's pickin' my show.
380
00:17:49,001 --> 00:17:50,702
You're outta your mind.
381
00:17:54,973 --> 00:17:57,009
Okay, Hank, I think
we got it.
382
00:17:57,042 --> 00:17:59,411
Yeah, that felt
pretty good.
383
00:17:59,445 --> 00:18:01,013
I can do better, though.
384
00:18:04,283 --> 00:18:06,185
Come on, put the
camera on me.
385
00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:08,720
Just let me
get the egging.
386
00:18:08,887 --> 00:18:12,024
Put the camera on me now,
and that's an order, rookie.
387
00:18:13,559 --> 00:18:15,961
I've been a cop
for five years.
388
00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:18,931
I meant rookie cameraman.
389
00:18:20,732 --> 00:18:22,901
KAREN:
Do it yourself, then.
390
00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:26,405
DAVIS:
Come on, Karen. Karen!
391
00:18:26,438 --> 00:18:28,640
I'll keep practicin'.
392
00:18:32,544 --> 00:18:34,446
Hi, there.
393
00:18:34,513 --> 00:18:36,448
I'm Lacey Burrows.
394
00:18:36,482 --> 00:18:38,050
I'm Wanda Dollard.
395
00:18:39,284 --> 00:18:40,752
Hello.
396
00:18:42,287 --> 00:18:44,356
I'm Emma Leroy.
397
00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:47,759
Welcome to A View
From Dog River.
398
00:18:47,926 --> 00:18:50,796
The View, Dog River Style.
399
00:18:50,929 --> 00:18:53,265
A Dog River Point of View.
400
00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:55,968
And the show would be
about me talking, uh--
401
00:18:56,001 --> 00:18:58,504
Sort of me talking to people.
402
00:18:58,570 --> 00:19:00,772
Things that have
a Dog River angle.
403
00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:02,307
And guests.
404
00:19:02,474 --> 00:19:04,109
There'd be
some questions.
405
00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:06,311
I'd make it sort of
interesting.
406
00:19:06,345 --> 00:19:08,514
Don't have any for
this presentation.
407
00:19:08,580 --> 00:19:09,581
Um...
408
00:19:09,615 --> 00:19:11,216
There could even be
an ostrich.
409
00:19:11,316 --> 00:19:13,152
Riding around on an ostrich.
410
00:19:13,285 --> 00:19:16,155
And something ostrichy,
I was thinking.
411
00:19:16,288 --> 00:19:18,957
Okay, so none of those.
412
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:21,493
It's like they
didn't even try.
413
00:19:22,027 --> 00:19:24,630
Maybe if they had all
have been on one show.
414
00:19:24,663 --> 00:19:26,131
I don't know.
415
00:19:26,298 --> 00:19:28,033
My dad made this one.
416
00:19:28,100 --> 00:19:30,102
God help us.
417
00:19:32,771 --> 00:19:35,140
Hi. I'm Oscar Leroy,
and my show is called
418
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:37,843
Not Peggy's Stupid Pets.
419
00:19:37,976 --> 00:19:39,845
BRENT:
So what's your show about?
420
00:19:39,978 --> 00:19:42,047
Well, I'll tell ya
what it's not about.
421
00:19:42,114 --> 00:19:44,516
It's not about Peggy and
it's not about pets,
422
00:19:44,616 --> 00:19:46,318
and it's not stupid.
423
00:19:46,351 --> 00:19:49,154
Got that, Jackass?
424
00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:52,824
I don't think that the Comedy
Network would air these.
425
00:19:54,493 --> 00:19:56,028
What was that?
426
00:19:58,397 --> 00:20:00,999
Oh, hey, I didn't know
you were in there.
427
00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:04,536
Heh, just, uh, just practicing
in case of re-shoots.
428
00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:19,418
Well, I guess all's
well that ends well.
Yeah.
429
00:20:19,484 --> 00:20:23,021
Hey, that reminds me of
that Shakespeare play, um--
430
00:20:23,121 --> 00:20:24,489
Meatballs?
431
00:20:24,623 --> 00:20:27,025
Yeah, somethin' like that.
432
00:20:27,159 --> 00:20:28,694
Is it on yet?
Not yet.
433
00:20:28,860 --> 00:20:31,063
Pipe down, everyone.
I can't see what I'm watchin.
434
00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:33,498
I wish Brent told us
which one he picked.
435
00:20:33,532 --> 00:20:35,901
I think he wanted
it to be a surprise.
436
00:20:36,001 --> 00:20:38,136
I think he was too
chicken to say.
437
00:20:38,170 --> 00:20:40,872
Whatever he chose, I, for one,
will respect his opinion.
438
00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:44,876
I sent him a bottle of wine as a
thank you for his hard work.
439
00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:48,113
Oh, I think this is it.
Everyone put a sock in it.
440
00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:51,883
ANNOUNCER:
And now, Cable Sask 10 presents
A View From Dog River.
441
00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:54,086
It's one of ours.
442
00:20:54,152 --> 00:20:56,121
What the hell is this?
443
00:20:56,188 --> 00:20:59,424
Is it yours?
It sure ain't mine.
444
00:21:02,694 --> 00:21:04,630
Okay, this is just stupid.
445
00:21:04,696 --> 00:21:07,532
I don't know.
It's kinda soothing.
446
00:21:07,566 --> 00:21:10,202
Yeah, peaceful.
447
00:21:10,435 --> 00:21:13,405
LACEY:
Well, it's no fire log,
that's for sure.
448
00:21:13,438 --> 00:21:15,440
EVERYONE:
Be quiet!
449
00:21:16,908 --> 00:21:22,180
Captioning by VerticalSync
www.verticalsync.com
450
00:21:22,214 --> 00:21:26,218
♪ I don't know the same things
you don't know ♪
451
00:21:29,454 --> 00:21:33,725
♪ I don't know
I just don't know ♪
452
00:21:39,531 --> 00:21:42,801
♪ It's a great big place ♪
453
00:21:42,968 --> 00:21:46,505
♪ full of nothin' but space ♪
454
00:21:46,571 --> 00:21:48,674
♪ and it's my happy place ♪
455
00:21:48,740 --> 00:21:52,110
♪ I don't know
Yes you do ♪
456
00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:55,847
♪ You just won't admit it ♪
457
00:21:55,981 --> 00:21:59,484
Want to have a gas online?
Visit us at cornergas.com
458
00:22:01,620 --> 00:22:04,623
♪ I don't know ♪
459
00:22:04,756 --> 00:22:08,226
♪ I just don't know ♪♪
33651
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