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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:42,669 --> 00:01:45,036 From the looks of it, I would say that Hinterstoisser 2 00:01:45,038 --> 00:01:47,518 has just gotten some very good news. 3 00:01:51,311 --> 00:01:55,079 It's good for him, bad for the United States. 4 00:01:55,081 --> 00:01:57,148 What the devil's keeping West? 5 00:02:08,228 --> 00:02:11,463 Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner. 6 00:02:15,201 --> 00:02:17,168 And to make the presentation, 7 00:02:17,170 --> 00:02:19,203 the president of the United States, 8 00:02:19,205 --> 00:02:22,607 Ulysses S. Grant. 9 00:02:22,609 --> 00:02:24,709 Thank you, baron. Thank you. 10 00:02:24,711 --> 00:02:26,711 Well done. 11 00:02:29,215 --> 00:02:31,182 Ladies and gentlemen, 12 00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:33,217 the President's Cup was initiated 13 00:02:33,219 --> 00:02:37,188 by the honorable James Buchanan in 1857. 14 00:04:52,892 --> 00:04:54,592 By the way, Mr. President, 15 00:04:54,594 --> 00:04:57,395 I'm holding a reception tomorrow at noon, 16 00:04:57,397 --> 00:04:59,797 and it is my fondest hope that you 17 00:04:59,799 --> 00:05:02,600 and the members of your cabinet will honor my country 18 00:05:02,602 --> 00:05:04,435 once more by your attendance. 19 00:05:04,437 --> 00:05:06,571 A reception? 20 00:05:06,573 --> 00:05:09,274 A kind of entertainment. 21 00:05:09,276 --> 00:05:12,510 But I beg you not to ask me for details, sir. 22 00:05:12,512 --> 00:05:16,847 I want it to be... 23 00:05:16,849 --> 00:05:18,783 a complete surprise. 24 00:05:18,785 --> 00:05:22,353 I sent couriers to all the other embassies, 25 00:05:22,355 --> 00:05:25,122 but I wanted to invite you personally. 26 00:05:25,124 --> 00:05:28,726 I wanted to be absolutely certain that you'd attend. 27 00:05:28,728 --> 00:05:31,062 Mr. Gordon. Sir? 28 00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:33,097 I don't know what our schedule is for noon tomorrow, 29 00:05:33,099 --> 00:05:35,700 but as of now, it's cancelled. Yes, sir. 30 00:05:35,702 --> 00:05:36,934 Wonderful. 31 00:05:36,936 --> 00:05:41,306 I think you'll find it, memorable. 32 00:07:05,358 --> 00:07:07,592 You know, baron, 33 00:07:07,594 --> 00:07:10,495 Mr. Gordon here has an extraordinary facility 34 00:07:10,497 --> 00:07:12,830 for picking up errant scraps of information. 35 00:07:12,832 --> 00:07:15,099 Sir. So I have heard. 36 00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:16,434 Indeed. 37 00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:20,438 He picked up a significant piece of information tonight. 38 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:21,539 Did you? 39 00:07:21,541 --> 00:07:23,974 Well, something that probably has to do 40 00:07:23,976 --> 00:07:26,344 with the entertainment you've planned, that's all. 41 00:07:26,346 --> 00:07:28,212 And what would that be? 42 00:07:28,214 --> 00:07:31,115 Merely that your chief of international security, 43 00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,383 Count Hackmar, 44 00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:35,453 arrived in the United States late this afternoon, 45 00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,388 is on his way to Washington. 46 00:07:37,390 --> 00:07:42,193 This gentleman keeps you well-informed, Mr. President. 47 00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:44,862 And quite right, 48 00:07:44,864 --> 00:07:48,299 Count Hackmar will be our guest of honor. 49 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:49,634 Then I can assume 50 00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:51,202 it's something of extreme importance? 51 00:07:51,204 --> 00:07:52,970 You can, sir. 52 00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:55,840 So important that I want everyone here, 53 00:07:55,842 --> 00:07:57,208 including you, Mr. Gordon. 54 00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:59,143 I want you to come. 55 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:02,380 I also want you to bring your associate. 56 00:08:02,382 --> 00:08:04,462 By the way, where is Mr. West? 57 00:08:06,619 --> 00:08:08,553 Well, Gordon? 58 00:08:08,555 --> 00:08:11,422 Well, sir, last time I saw him, 59 00:08:11,424 --> 00:08:12,824 he was heading for the garden. 60 00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:14,258 What the devil for? 61 00:08:14,260 --> 00:08:16,260 Well, sir, he said something 62 00:08:16,262 --> 00:08:17,895 about wanting to show the big dipper 63 00:08:17,897 --> 00:08:20,097 to the daughter of the Lithuanian ambassador. 64 00:08:20,099 --> 00:08:22,867 I see. 65 00:08:22,869 --> 00:08:25,870 No great tragedy, Mr. President. 66 00:08:25,872 --> 00:08:28,773 It is spring, after all. 67 00:08:28,775 --> 00:08:32,042 Gruber, see if you can rescue Mr. West 68 00:08:32,044 --> 00:08:34,512 from the young lady's clutches. 69 00:08:36,716 --> 00:08:39,316 West is missing. Find him. 70 00:08:54,517 --> 00:08:56,183 I'm sorry, sir. I was detained. 71 00:08:56,185 --> 00:08:57,418 Where was he, major? 72 00:08:57,420 --> 00:09:01,322 With the daughter of the Armenian ambassador. 73 00:09:01,324 --> 00:09:03,658 Could have sworn she was Lithuanian. 74 00:09:05,862 --> 00:09:08,128 Armenian, Lithuanian, 75 00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:09,430 it doesn't matter, 76 00:09:09,432 --> 00:09:13,768 as long as she was, attractive, ja? 77 00:09:13,770 --> 00:09:17,304 You are invited to a reception tomorrow, Mr. West. 78 00:09:17,306 --> 00:09:21,175 I was just about to show your honorable president 79 00:09:21,177 --> 00:09:24,178 something quite special. 80 00:09:24,180 --> 00:09:26,614 It's in here, gentlemen, 81 00:09:26,616 --> 00:09:28,883 the... 82 00:09:28,885 --> 00:09:31,051 essence of tomorrow's 83 00:09:31,053 --> 00:09:33,588 little entertainment. 84 00:09:37,594 --> 00:09:39,794 No. No, no. 85 00:09:39,796 --> 00:09:43,163 You'll just have to wait. 86 00:09:43,165 --> 00:09:46,934 I am sure that you'll enjoy it much more if it, 87 00:09:46,936 --> 00:09:49,336 it comes as a, 88 00:09:49,338 --> 00:09:51,472 complete surprise. 89 00:09:51,474 --> 00:09:53,508 Ja. 90 00:10:07,724 --> 00:10:11,325 So until the reception, gentlemen... 91 00:10:14,297 --> 00:10:16,898 you'll just have to wait. 92 00:10:36,519 --> 00:10:38,486 You're going to drop your hat, Mr. President. 93 00:10:38,488 --> 00:10:41,722 I am? Right now. 94 00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:44,164 I'm sorry, Mr. West. Thank you. 95 00:10:46,963 --> 00:10:48,663 Good night. 96 00:10:50,767 --> 00:10:53,668 I will repeat your orders! 97 00:10:53,670 --> 00:10:57,438 Do not let West and Gordon out of your sight. 98 00:10:57,440 --> 00:11:00,207 And if they start sniffing about, 99 00:11:00,209 --> 00:11:02,276 and they will, I promise you, 100 00:11:02,278 --> 00:11:04,479 stop them 101 00:11:04,481 --> 00:11:06,213 any way 102 00:11:06,215 --> 00:11:09,049 and by any means. 103 00:11:18,862 --> 00:11:21,328 What the devil is that? 104 00:11:21,330 --> 00:11:24,499 It's a series of sequenced photographs. 105 00:11:24,501 --> 00:11:26,066 Like the Kinetoscope shows 106 00:11:26,068 --> 00:11:28,369 they have at the penny arcades, Mr. President. 107 00:11:28,371 --> 00:11:31,539 Those seem to be on a much more highly developed scale. 108 00:11:31,541 --> 00:11:33,073 But what for? 109 00:11:33,075 --> 00:11:35,877 I have a sneaking suspicion we'll find out what for 110 00:11:35,879 --> 00:11:38,145 when we can run that off. 111 00:11:46,255 --> 00:11:49,456 - So now we know. - That's my office. 112 00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:52,459 Yes, sir, but there's one slight mistake. 113 00:11:52,461 --> 00:11:55,229 The portrait of General Washington. 114 00:11:55,231 --> 00:11:57,598 It's facing the wrong way, sir. 115 00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:08,776 By George, even I would think that was me. 116 00:12:08,778 --> 00:12:11,879 Yes, sir. I don't know where they got him, 117 00:12:11,881 --> 00:12:14,214 but he could pass as your twin brother. 118 00:12:17,854 --> 00:12:21,188 Well, enter Mr. Sumi Igo, 119 00:12:21,190 --> 00:12:24,025 foreign minister of a nation very much in the news today. 120 00:12:25,895 --> 00:12:27,327 Look at that. 121 00:12:27,329 --> 00:12:30,031 Actually, I've never even met that man. 122 00:12:30,033 --> 00:12:33,100 No, sir, but on the basis of what we're seeing, 123 00:12:33,102 --> 00:12:34,134 you'd have a difficult time 124 00:12:34,136 --> 00:12:36,470 convincing the rest of the world. 125 00:12:39,341 --> 00:12:43,343 Now, what's that document supposed to be? 126 00:12:43,345 --> 00:12:46,581 It's just an idea, Mr. President. 127 00:12:46,583 --> 00:12:48,683 I'd say the United States 128 00:12:48,685 --> 00:12:52,152 and the unsavory nation of Mr. Sumi Igo 129 00:12:52,154 --> 00:12:55,790 are entering into a secret defense pact. 130 00:12:55,792 --> 00:12:59,159 All of which will cause the indignation and distrust 131 00:12:59,161 --> 00:13:01,462 of the entire civilized world, 132 00:13:01,464 --> 00:13:03,864 much to the glee of Baron Hinterstoisser. 133 00:13:03,866 --> 00:13:05,633 Whose country would then proceed 134 00:13:05,635 --> 00:13:08,836 to make political capital of it all over the world. 135 00:13:13,743 --> 00:13:15,676 The end. 136 00:13:18,447 --> 00:13:25,019 Well, they'd believe it, of course. 137 00:13:25,021 --> 00:13:26,787 I'd even believe it myself, 138 00:13:26,789 --> 00:13:29,189 if I didn't know it wasn't me. 139 00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:33,393 It was a job well done, West, 140 00:13:33,395 --> 00:13:36,764 relieving that embassy of their little peep show. 141 00:13:36,766 --> 00:13:38,198 Thank you, sir. 142 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:42,302 I'm afraid it's not quite that simple, Mr. President. 143 00:13:44,107 --> 00:13:47,108 If Hinterstoisser opens that box at the reception 144 00:13:47,110 --> 00:13:49,276 and doesn't find this, 145 00:13:49,278 --> 00:13:52,013 who do you think he'll accuse? 146 00:13:52,015 --> 00:13:56,283 Embassies are considered foreign soil, Mr. President. 147 00:13:56,285 --> 00:13:58,119 It's a very serious charge. 148 00:13:58,121 --> 00:13:59,987 Then when they show their duplicate film, 149 00:13:59,989 --> 00:14:01,255 and I'm sure they have several, 150 00:14:01,257 --> 00:14:03,024 we'll look twice as bad, sir. 151 00:14:05,461 --> 00:14:09,096 Well, what in the blue super-heated blazes 152 00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:11,498 are we going to do? 153 00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:14,669 Well, they're expecting a show. 154 00:14:14,671 --> 00:14:16,771 I see no reason to disappoint them, 155 00:14:16,773 --> 00:14:19,206 right, Jim? 156 00:14:19,208 --> 00:14:21,241 But if you do that... 157 00:14:21,243 --> 00:14:24,779 Mr. President, it may not be exactly the same show 158 00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:25,846 the baron's expecting. 159 00:14:25,848 --> 00:14:28,182 Well, the main problem right now 160 00:14:28,184 --> 00:14:31,786 is getting this back into the security chambers 161 00:14:31,788 --> 00:14:33,387 of Baron Hinterstoisser. 162 00:14:33,389 --> 00:14:35,389 We don't have much time, I'm afraid, 163 00:14:35,391 --> 00:14:39,894 so if you'll excuse us, Mr. President. 164 00:14:39,896 --> 00:14:41,696 Wait. 165 00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:47,168 Gentlemen, there's something you should know. 166 00:14:47,170 --> 00:14:48,903 In the past three months, 167 00:14:48,905 --> 00:14:51,672 seven of our personnel have gone into that embassy 168 00:14:51,674 --> 00:14:54,508 for one security errand or another. 169 00:14:54,510 --> 00:14:56,877 Not one of them has returned. 170 00:14:56,879 --> 00:14:58,312 They must be presumed dead. 171 00:15:01,984 --> 00:15:04,018 That ought to lend a certain interest 172 00:15:04,020 --> 00:15:05,020 to the proceedings, sir. 173 00:15:42,925 --> 00:15:45,559 Two, three, 174 00:15:45,561 --> 00:15:48,162 four, five... Artie. 175 00:15:48,164 --> 00:15:50,130 Six, seven... I hate to interrupt you. 176 00:15:50,132 --> 00:15:52,332 Eight, nine, 177 00:15:52,334 --> 00:15:56,036 ten, eleven, twelve, 178 00:15:56,038 --> 00:15:58,439 13, 14, 179 00:15:58,441 --> 00:16:02,309 15, 16... 180 00:16:02,311 --> 00:16:04,478 It's always the same, 16 seconds. 181 00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:06,846 Artie, what history-making demonstration is that? 182 00:16:06,848 --> 00:16:08,782 It's my newest chemical leach. 183 00:16:08,784 --> 00:16:11,017 It has something the other leaches don't have? 184 00:16:11,019 --> 00:16:13,653 Yeah. This is made from a material 185 00:16:13,655 --> 00:16:17,057 with so highly a refined and adhesive compound 186 00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:18,425 that it can support a man's weight 187 00:16:18,427 --> 00:16:20,227 up to 200 pounds for 16 seconds. 188 00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:22,129 Here, let me show you. 189 00:16:22,131 --> 00:16:24,598 See, the material is totally malleable, 190 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:28,735 yet you slam it against a hard surface and it holds. 191 00:16:28,737 --> 00:16:30,770 That's very impressive. Thank you. 192 00:16:30,772 --> 00:16:32,606 Here's the data from Washington. 193 00:16:32,608 --> 00:16:35,442 Yeah. 194 00:16:35,444 --> 00:16:37,711 "Embassy constructed 1852. 195 00:16:37,713 --> 00:16:40,614 "Architect and builder, Jasper P. Mantis. 196 00:16:40,616 --> 00:16:43,049 "Additional subterranean improvements, 1871. 197 00:16:43,051 --> 00:16:45,719 Architect and builder Elwood R. Quincy." 198 00:16:45,721 --> 00:16:46,853 Quincy. 199 00:16:46,855 --> 00:16:48,655 Isn't that the one that built 200 00:16:48,657 --> 00:16:51,825 the vaults in the treasury building? 201 00:16:51,827 --> 00:16:53,093 Right. 202 00:16:53,095 --> 00:16:56,029 Well, three cheers for the research department. 203 00:16:56,031 --> 00:16:57,264 Have you checked on Quincy? 204 00:16:57,266 --> 00:17:00,334 Quincy's dead. 205 00:17:00,336 --> 00:17:03,003 But he had an office here in Washington. 206 00:18:22,784 --> 00:18:25,885 He must be here. Search every place. 207 00:18:49,411 --> 00:18:50,877 Bring him right over here. 208 00:18:57,253 --> 00:18:59,319 Get him up. 209 00:19:20,226 --> 00:19:22,760 Here you go, Tabby. 210 00:19:22,762 --> 00:19:26,063 Thattaboy. 211 00:19:26,065 --> 00:19:29,033 So you left the four of them in Quincy's office? 212 00:19:29,035 --> 00:19:31,301 Sleeping it off? Yeah, sort of. 213 00:19:31,303 --> 00:19:33,270 There were four security guards from the embassy. 214 00:19:33,272 --> 00:19:34,672 Artie. 215 00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:36,473 When are you gonna get rid of that cat? 216 00:19:36,475 --> 00:19:38,709 Listen, he stowed aboard in Denver. 217 00:19:38,711 --> 00:19:40,077 I'm going to see to it he gets home. 218 00:19:40,079 --> 00:19:42,746 Can I see that photo? Certainly. 219 00:19:42,748 --> 00:19:46,050 These are the boys who did the job, all right. 220 00:19:46,052 --> 00:19:47,918 Look at the date, will you? 221 00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:50,320 This must have been taken the day they finished. 222 00:19:50,322 --> 00:19:53,223 Well, from all the information that we have, 223 00:19:53,225 --> 00:19:56,927 Hinterstoisser had them deported. 224 00:19:56,929 --> 00:20:01,298 Artie, look at this. 225 00:20:01,300 --> 00:20:04,534 Well, there's proof at least part of the information's wrong. 226 00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:07,504 Five will get you ten, he's a stonemason. 227 00:20:07,506 --> 00:20:09,907 Look at the trowel in his belt. 228 00:20:09,909 --> 00:20:12,442 Yeah, that's it. 229 00:20:12,444 --> 00:20:14,111 All you gotta do is find him. 230 00:20:14,113 --> 00:20:15,245 Me? Yeah. 231 00:20:15,247 --> 00:20:16,747 I got a date with a photographer 232 00:20:16,749 --> 00:20:18,749 about a Kinetoscope. 233 00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:02,199 Move, and you die. 234 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,270 You're Dick January. 235 00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:15,472 You don't say. Who the devil are you? 236 00:21:15,474 --> 00:21:18,241 James West. I'm a secret service agent. 237 00:21:20,179 --> 00:21:21,945 Is that supposed to impress me? 238 00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:25,015 I don't care whether it impresses you or not. 239 00:21:25,017 --> 00:21:27,350 I'll settle for some small conversation. 240 00:21:27,352 --> 00:21:30,353 Well, make it real small, secret service agent, 241 00:21:30,355 --> 00:21:33,590 then get out. 242 00:21:33,592 --> 00:21:36,927 You take a good picture, Mr. January. 243 00:21:40,733 --> 00:21:42,432 You're confusing me with another guy 244 00:21:42,434 --> 00:21:44,935 who likes to mind his own business. 245 00:21:44,937 --> 00:21:49,239 I see. They must have done a first-class job on you. 246 00:21:49,241 --> 00:21:51,575 What are you talking about? 247 00:21:51,577 --> 00:21:53,858 Well, they worked you over, didn't they? 248 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:57,147 Get out. 249 00:21:57,149 --> 00:22:00,350 Why don't you keep a night-light burning? 250 00:22:00,352 --> 00:22:02,953 Maybe they won't come back for you. 251 00:22:06,258 --> 00:22:08,759 Mister, I'll let you in on a little secret. 252 00:22:08,761 --> 00:22:11,494 I've got a very special program. You know what it is? 253 00:22:11,496 --> 00:22:13,363 Why don't you tell me? 254 00:22:13,365 --> 00:22:15,332 It's to stay alive, see. 255 00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:17,567 It's not to get myself killed over something 256 00:22:17,569 --> 00:22:18,969 that don't put a penny in my pocket 257 00:22:18,971 --> 00:22:21,238 or add up to a row of beans in my sweet life. 258 00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:25,209 That's very interesting. 259 00:22:25,211 --> 00:22:28,946 Here's another interesting little item. 260 00:22:28,948 --> 00:22:30,981 Yeah, they worked me over, all right, 261 00:22:30,983 --> 00:22:34,351 came close to killing me. 262 00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:37,988 Mr. Quincy was murdered. I suppose you know that. 263 00:22:37,990 --> 00:22:39,356 Yeah, I figured that. 264 00:22:39,358 --> 00:22:42,860 He was scared all the time, he was at the embassy too. 265 00:22:42,862 --> 00:22:45,395 He must have known it was coming. 266 00:22:45,397 --> 00:22:48,632 Why'd they hire you when the rest were all foreign? 267 00:22:48,634 --> 00:22:51,334 They had a stonemason, one of their own. 268 00:22:51,336 --> 00:22:52,970 He was killed in a fall. 269 00:22:52,972 --> 00:22:54,671 Mr. Quincy came to me and asked me 270 00:22:54,673 --> 00:22:56,073 if I wanted to make some quick money. 271 00:22:56,075 --> 00:22:58,541 When I said, "sure," that's when he warned me. 272 00:22:58,543 --> 00:23:00,310 "Whatever you do," he said, 273 00:23:00,312 --> 00:23:03,180 "keep your eyes to yourself and don't ask any questions." 274 00:23:03,182 --> 00:23:06,750 Can you draw a sketch of the work you did for them? 275 00:23:06,752 --> 00:23:09,820 It wouldn't help you none. By the time I got there, 276 00:23:09,822 --> 00:23:11,454 just about all the work was finished, 277 00:23:11,456 --> 00:23:14,424 except for a big dumbwaiter I worked on in the kitchen. 278 00:23:14,426 --> 00:23:17,961 A dumbwaiter in the kitchen? 279 00:23:17,963 --> 00:23:19,797 Yeah, Artie, from the kitchen to the basement. 280 00:23:19,799 --> 00:23:22,465 They said it was for lowering garbage. 281 00:23:22,467 --> 00:23:24,968 Why would they want to lower garbage down to the basement 282 00:23:24,970 --> 00:23:27,070 when you can carry it right out the back door? 283 00:23:27,072 --> 00:23:29,106 Exactly. We can thank Mr. January 284 00:23:29,108 --> 00:23:31,775 for some very valuable information. 285 00:23:44,790 --> 00:23:46,489 How about it, Artie, you set? 286 00:23:46,491 --> 00:23:48,458 All set, Jim. 287 00:24:27,632 --> 00:24:29,266 What now, major? 288 00:24:29,268 --> 00:24:30,633 Nothing. 289 00:24:30,635 --> 00:24:34,238 As long as they're in there, everything is fine. 290 00:25:19,751 --> 00:25:23,351 Must be some kind of abandoned well. 291 00:26:40,148 --> 00:26:42,015 Who are you? 292 00:26:42,017 --> 00:26:45,651 I am the new night chef, Hans. 293 00:26:45,653 --> 00:26:49,689 You mean you have not been notified? 294 00:26:49,691 --> 00:26:53,026 They never tell me anything around here. 295 00:26:53,028 --> 00:26:55,428 Well, don't stand there like a statue. 296 00:26:55,430 --> 00:26:57,430 Count Hackmar's due at any moment. 297 00:26:57,432 --> 00:27:00,466 Madame, so I have been told. 298 00:27:00,468 --> 00:27:03,837 Rice imperatrice is his favorite dessert. 299 00:27:03,839 --> 00:27:06,072 I can only hope you know how to make it. 300 00:27:06,074 --> 00:27:09,876 Madame, rice imperatrice happens to be 301 00:27:09,878 --> 00:27:12,212 my principle specialty. 302 00:27:12,214 --> 00:27:13,412 As a matter of fact, 303 00:27:13,414 --> 00:27:16,549 I will need some rice, some flour, sugar... 304 00:27:16,551 --> 00:27:17,951 Eggs, 305 00:27:17,953 --> 00:27:20,486 some colored jellies, some heavy cream, 306 00:27:20,488 --> 00:27:22,021 and some kirschwasser. 307 00:27:22,023 --> 00:27:24,190 First the kirschwasser? 308 00:27:24,192 --> 00:27:27,160 You will find it in the wine cellar. 309 00:27:29,898 --> 00:27:32,999 I was hoping that you would bring it to me. 310 00:27:33,001 --> 00:27:36,970 Supervisors do not run errands for night chefs. 311 00:27:38,373 --> 00:27:40,039 Say that again. 312 00:27:40,041 --> 00:27:41,808 Supervisors... 313 00:27:41,810 --> 00:27:43,709 Why should I say that again? 314 00:27:43,711 --> 00:27:45,879 Because when you say "supervisors," 315 00:27:45,881 --> 00:27:48,381 your nose crinkles up in the most adorable way. 316 00:27:48,383 --> 00:27:50,316 Did you know that? 317 00:27:50,318 --> 00:27:51,484 Really? 318 00:27:52,921 --> 00:27:56,355 Well, I didn't know. I... 319 00:27:56,357 --> 00:28:00,226 And to think I resisted 320 00:28:00,228 --> 00:28:02,929 this job transfer here to America. 321 00:28:02,931 --> 00:28:04,697 Well, I tell you what, Hans. 322 00:28:04,699 --> 00:28:06,465 I will get the kirschwasser, 323 00:28:06,467 --> 00:28:08,201 you start to prepare the eggs, ja? 324 00:28:08,203 --> 00:28:10,170 Wonderful.! 325 00:28:10,172 --> 00:28:13,472 Don't forget the brandy, 326 00:28:13,474 --> 00:28:15,942 Brandy? Rice imperatrice? 327 00:28:15,944 --> 00:28:18,945 No, to toast the beginning of what I know will be 328 00:28:18,947 --> 00:28:22,282 a marvelous friendship. 329 00:28:22,284 --> 00:28:25,785 Hans, you are a devil. I can see that already. 330 00:28:42,737 --> 00:28:45,071 Liebste! 331 00:28:45,073 --> 00:28:47,974 Hans, I was thinking that we might... 332 00:28:47,976 --> 00:28:50,509 Hans? 333 00:28:50,511 --> 00:28:53,880 Liebste, where are you? 334 00:29:17,072 --> 00:29:19,472 Artie, as many times 335 00:29:19,474 --> 00:29:20,974 as you've shown me that diagram, 336 00:29:20,976 --> 00:29:23,977 I still don't understand how you expect it to work. 337 00:29:23,979 --> 00:29:27,013 Let's try it one more time, all right? 338 00:29:27,015 --> 00:29:30,016 All right. 339 00:29:30,018 --> 00:29:34,187 Now, you start by moving to the wall. 340 00:29:34,189 --> 00:29:35,821 Once you get there, 341 00:29:35,823 --> 00:29:40,326 you have these two obstacles right there. 342 00:29:40,328 --> 00:29:43,662 You mean here... 343 00:29:43,664 --> 00:29:46,665 - and here. - Right. 344 00:31:25,666 --> 00:31:28,667 Now we know what happened to the seven men who disappeared. 345 00:31:28,669 --> 00:31:31,004 Yeah. 346 00:31:31,006 --> 00:31:35,074 Lucky for us we didn't make it nine. 347 00:31:35,076 --> 00:31:37,610 Now once those are taken care of, 348 00:31:37,612 --> 00:31:40,980 try the next move, which is right over here. 349 00:31:40,982 --> 00:31:44,117 Artie, I understand all that so far. 350 00:31:44,119 --> 00:31:49,155 It's the next move that I'm not sure about. 351 00:31:49,157 --> 00:31:51,624 Well, the next move is really the most complicated. 352 00:31:51,626 --> 00:31:54,127 You see, you have to be very careful 353 00:31:54,129 --> 00:31:56,262 when you apply the pressure. 354 00:31:56,264 --> 00:31:57,830 See, you have to be careful 355 00:31:57,832 --> 00:32:00,933 with the amount of pressure you use. 356 00:32:00,935 --> 00:32:03,769 Assuming you maintain the pressure correctly, 357 00:32:03,771 --> 00:32:07,273 that still leaves you one more major problem. 358 00:32:07,275 --> 00:32:08,541 Which is? 359 00:32:08,543 --> 00:32:11,010 These swine! I'll kill them. 360 00:32:11,012 --> 00:32:12,778 It should show you everything else 361 00:32:12,780 --> 00:32:13,846 you need to know. 362 00:32:13,848 --> 00:32:15,248 Again, the whole thing depends 363 00:32:15,250 --> 00:32:17,490 on how successful you are at interpreting what... 364 00:32:41,543 --> 00:32:44,043 Blue's for the blades. 365 00:32:48,683 --> 00:32:52,085 Yellow works the wall. 366 00:32:52,087 --> 00:32:54,520 Leaves green and red. 367 00:33:01,996 --> 00:33:05,298 Very impressive. 368 00:33:08,069 --> 00:33:11,337 Did it ever occur to you that red might mean danger? 369 00:33:11,339 --> 00:33:13,506 For instance? For instance, 370 00:33:13,508 --> 00:33:16,709 red for fire, fire for explosion. 371 00:33:16,711 --> 00:33:18,444 What would they want to explode? 372 00:33:18,446 --> 00:33:21,847 People who fool around with their levers. 373 00:33:21,849 --> 00:33:25,251 You're absolutely right, Artie. 374 00:33:29,424 --> 00:33:33,759 Red doesn't mean that. It means security chamber. 375 00:33:37,965 --> 00:33:39,798 Where is everyone out here? 376 00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:43,102 Don't we have anyone to open the door? 377 00:33:48,543 --> 00:33:50,943 Didn't you hear the door? 378 00:33:52,747 --> 00:33:54,747 Count Hackmar. 379 00:33:54,749 --> 00:33:57,416 Welcome to the United States. 380 00:34:22,743 --> 00:34:25,044 Psst. 381 00:34:41,729 --> 00:34:45,130 Artie, why would they put the heating plant 382 00:34:45,132 --> 00:34:46,666 in the middle of the security chamber? 383 00:34:46,668 --> 00:34:48,334 Doesn't make sense, does it? 384 00:34:48,336 --> 00:34:49,935 No. 385 00:35:01,115 --> 00:35:03,583 It's the end of the line for the elevator. 386 00:35:03,585 --> 00:35:05,184 Yeah. 387 00:35:05,186 --> 00:35:08,153 Now all we need is the box. 388 00:35:14,229 --> 00:35:17,697 This will warm your blood. 389 00:35:17,699 --> 00:35:20,999 I don't like journeys, Hinterstoisser. 390 00:35:21,001 --> 00:35:23,302 Your reception had better be worth 391 00:35:23,304 --> 00:35:25,204 3,000 miles of travel. 392 00:35:25,206 --> 00:35:28,374 It will be. I stake my life on it. 393 00:35:32,113 --> 00:35:34,280 To your health, Excellency, 394 00:35:34,282 --> 00:35:36,215 and to the long-awaited expansion 395 00:35:36,217 --> 00:35:37,457 of our sovereign nation. 396 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:48,093 You should know, Hinterstoisser, 397 00:35:48,095 --> 00:35:50,496 that I have been instructed to tell you 398 00:35:50,498 --> 00:35:53,999 if things turn out as well as anticipated, 399 00:35:54,001 --> 00:35:58,571 you can expect a significant promotion. 400 00:35:58,573 --> 00:36:00,773 That comes straight from the emperor himself. 401 00:36:02,644 --> 00:36:05,278 It's incredible, 402 00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:07,079 absolutely incredible. 403 00:36:07,081 --> 00:36:09,915 I've never seen a safe like this before in my life. 404 00:36:09,917 --> 00:36:11,250 Neither have I. 405 00:36:11,252 --> 00:36:13,619 The whole thing is held locked by this, 406 00:36:13,621 --> 00:36:15,254 tons of pressure. 407 00:36:15,256 --> 00:36:16,922 That explains the boilers. 408 00:36:16,924 --> 00:36:19,625 Yeah. We got problems, Jim. 409 00:36:19,627 --> 00:36:21,294 I don't think we could pry this open 410 00:36:21,296 --> 00:36:23,362 with an elephant. 411 00:36:37,178 --> 00:36:39,612 Tons of steam pressure, Jim, 412 00:36:39,614 --> 00:36:42,414 forcing that piston against the safe. 413 00:36:42,416 --> 00:36:45,618 No steam, no pressure, right, Artie? 414 00:36:47,221 --> 00:36:49,155 Good luck. 415 00:36:49,157 --> 00:36:52,058 Come in. 416 00:36:54,696 --> 00:36:57,396 Mr. President, it's time to dress for the reception. 417 00:36:57,398 --> 00:36:59,165 Is there any word from West or Gordon? 418 00:36:59,167 --> 00:37:00,599 No, sir. None. 419 00:37:00,601 --> 00:37:02,969 Thank you. 420 00:37:13,181 --> 00:37:15,014 Open up. 421 00:39:41,495 --> 00:39:43,329 Let go. 422 00:41:36,210 --> 00:41:38,376 The reception's going to start any minute. 423 00:41:38,378 --> 00:41:39,878 We got to be there with the president. 424 00:41:39,880 --> 00:41:41,346 We can't go through the kitchen. 425 00:41:41,348 --> 00:41:43,716 There's no telling who we might run into there. 426 00:42:05,806 --> 00:42:07,706 Jim. 427 00:42:17,551 --> 00:42:19,384 The pipe. 428 00:42:39,306 --> 00:42:41,006 You all set? 429 00:42:41,008 --> 00:42:42,775 Yeah, Artie. 430 00:42:45,279 --> 00:42:47,746 It's all yours, Jim. 431 00:44:00,721 --> 00:44:03,021 Welcome to the embassy, gentlemen. 432 00:44:03,023 --> 00:44:06,859 You just leave your hats here and take a seat in that room. 433 00:44:08,963 --> 00:44:12,131 Mr. President, gentlemen. 434 00:44:12,133 --> 00:44:14,900 I was just about ready to give you up. 435 00:44:19,339 --> 00:44:20,705 Please. 436 00:44:20,707 --> 00:44:24,243 Gentlemen, please be seated. 437 00:44:24,245 --> 00:44:28,346 You know what this is all about? 438 00:44:35,422 --> 00:44:39,258 You and I are about to change the course of history. 439 00:44:40,661 --> 00:44:42,795 Guard. 440 00:44:42,797 --> 00:44:45,297 Gentlemen, I'm very happy 441 00:44:45,299 --> 00:44:47,632 that you could attend this afternoon. 442 00:44:47,634 --> 00:44:49,734 I have something to impart to you 443 00:44:49,736 --> 00:44:54,106 that I think will be of great interest. 444 00:44:54,108 --> 00:44:57,042 As you know, my country has maintained 445 00:44:57,044 --> 00:44:58,911 diplomatic relations with the United States 446 00:44:58,913 --> 00:45:00,345 for over 30 years. 447 00:45:00,347 --> 00:45:03,882 This has not been altogether easy. 448 00:45:03,884 --> 00:45:06,218 On more than one occasion, 449 00:45:06,220 --> 00:45:08,753 our patience has been stretched 450 00:45:08,755 --> 00:45:11,589 to the limits of endurance. 451 00:45:11,591 --> 00:45:14,359 Only maturity and great understanding 452 00:45:14,361 --> 00:45:16,829 has kept us from severing all ties. 453 00:45:18,732 --> 00:45:20,632 Last week, however, 454 00:45:20,634 --> 00:45:24,336 President Ulysses S. Grant committed a deed 455 00:45:24,338 --> 00:45:26,004 of such shocking magnitude 456 00:45:26,006 --> 00:45:29,241 that we can no longer forgive, 457 00:45:29,243 --> 00:45:30,775 we can no longer tolerate, 458 00:45:30,777 --> 00:45:33,111 we can no longer endure. 459 00:45:33,113 --> 00:45:35,647 Fortunately, our agents were able 460 00:45:35,649 --> 00:45:37,850 to catch General Grant in the act. 461 00:45:39,353 --> 00:45:41,920 And due to the revolutionary advances 462 00:45:41,922 --> 00:45:44,256 of our scientists and technicians, 463 00:45:44,258 --> 00:45:47,625 were able to capture his unforgivable deed 464 00:45:47,627 --> 00:45:50,562 and record it for the archives of history. 465 00:45:53,700 --> 00:45:56,268 I'll show it to you now. 466 00:46:06,546 --> 00:46:08,413 Gruber. 467 00:46:54,861 --> 00:46:56,828 I need hardly point out 468 00:46:56,830 --> 00:46:58,730 that the document Mr. Igo is holding 469 00:46:58,732 --> 00:47:00,165 is a secret agreement. 470 00:47:19,119 --> 00:47:20,399 Something is wrong. 471 00:47:25,960 --> 00:47:27,759 Stop it! Stop it at once! 472 00:47:27,761 --> 00:47:29,995 Don't bother. 473 00:47:29,997 --> 00:47:32,164 You've gone this far, let them see the rest 474 00:47:32,166 --> 00:47:34,666 of your little comedy. 475 00:48:12,439 --> 00:48:14,572 Well, well, baron. 476 00:48:14,574 --> 00:48:16,408 I want to congratulate you 477 00:48:16,410 --> 00:48:18,743 on a marvelously funny piece of entertainment. 478 00:48:18,745 --> 00:48:21,113 Now, I'm only sorry my cabinet members 479 00:48:21,115 --> 00:48:22,714 weren't here to see it. 480 00:48:27,954 --> 00:48:30,455 You have provided the world 481 00:48:30,457 --> 00:48:33,591 with some very charming amusement. 482 00:48:35,262 --> 00:48:38,263 Perhaps I can do the same for you 483 00:48:38,265 --> 00:48:40,765 when we return to the homeland. 484 00:48:49,976 --> 00:48:52,411 I'm just glad it's over. 485 00:48:52,413 --> 00:48:55,213 To the good Baron Hinterstoisser. 486 00:48:55,215 --> 00:48:57,349 Wherever he is. 487 00:49:00,320 --> 00:49:01,920 Artie, you know, that reminds me. 488 00:49:01,922 --> 00:49:03,088 I never did congratulate you 489 00:49:03,090 --> 00:49:04,923 on the marvelous Kinetoscope performance. 490 00:49:04,925 --> 00:49:06,058 Thank you. Listen, 491 00:49:06,060 --> 00:49:09,161 I've been giving that a lot of thought. 492 00:49:09,163 --> 00:49:11,296 Yeah, you know, 493 00:49:11,298 --> 00:49:13,031 you remember how everybody was laughing 494 00:49:13,033 --> 00:49:14,533 when I pretended to be the president? 495 00:49:14,535 --> 00:49:17,436 Even I thought it was funny. It was funny. So? 496 00:49:17,438 --> 00:49:18,437 Well, I've been thinking. 497 00:49:18,439 --> 00:49:20,605 Suppose now, just suppose, 498 00:49:20,607 --> 00:49:22,407 that I made another Kinetoscope, 499 00:49:22,409 --> 00:49:26,244 only longer this time, and we rented a hall. 500 00:49:26,246 --> 00:49:28,947 I bet you people would pay money to see that. 501 00:49:28,949 --> 00:49:31,883 Pay money to see it? Come on, Artie. 502 00:49:31,885 --> 00:49:33,485 A dime? A nickel? 503 00:49:33,487 --> 00:49:37,122 Artie. Here, Have another champagne. 504 00:49:37,124 --> 00:49:39,624 It was just a thought. 505 00:49:41,895 --> 00:49:44,862 I'm glad it was just a thought, Artie. 36169

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