All language subtitles for The Wild Wild West - 01x03 - The Night the Wizard Shook the Earth.Unspecified.English.updated.Addic7ed.com

A pity- he whistled
so beautifully.

My lovely mother-
the good Lord rest her-

was particularly fond
of that melody.

She worshipped
music-

a saint in a world
so imperfect.

Now, Voltaire,
put me over there,

if you would
be so good.

Did you buy me
a peashooter?

Uh-huh.

Might I see
it, please?

Oh, charming.

And now the jewel box.

So tiny and yet
so powerful.

Just imagine,
merely six of these

could destroy
a whole city block-

a pea bag full,
an entire city.

Now, hold it
gently, Voltaire.

We don't want to be
blown to kingdom come.

No, don't... don't...
don't be afraid.

Just think of it
as if it were

no more than an
ordinary pebble.

Now, watch.

In a few moments,

Professor Neilsen will be
coming down that gangplank-

too far away
for us, alas,

but he will be coming
closer with each step,

until finally he
gets into range,

and that will be the end
of Professor Neilsen.

And with this...

I can't possibly miss.

Do I look like
Professor Neilsen?

Oh, come on, Jim,

you're really not going through with this.

I think glasses give me

a rather distinguished look,
don't you, Artemus?

You're setting yourself
up as a clay pigeon,

an open target.

We can't take any chances
with the professor.

He's as hot
as his invention.

Fine, then
let's give him

a bodyguard
of armed men

until we can get
him and his papers

delivered
to Washington.

No.

We have to bring
into the open

whoever is after
the professor.

Now, if
you'll excuse me,

he's waiting for me
in his cabin.

All right, you
make your point.

But I'm not letting
you out of my sight.

Oh, yes, you are.
Uh-uh.

You've got to check out
the railroad station.

I'm going to take
the professor

and his secretary
to the hotel,

and then we're going to leave
in the morning as scheduled.

Will you at least let me
escort you to the carriage?

You worry too much, Artemus.

Now, get moving.

It's not you
I'm worried about.

I just don't like

to break in
a whole new partner.

Come on, Neilsen.

If there's anything I can't
stand, it's a dawdler.

You ready to go to shore,
Professor Neilsen?

But, Mr. West,

you're not
Professor Neilsen.

I am now, Miss Lundquist.

At least for the next few hours.

Well, why
the masquerade?

There are people who would
like to stop the professor

from working for my government.

So, Mr. West,

the Secret
Service man,

is now
Professor Neilsen,

and I am
his butler.

Shall we go?

We sent the
luggage ashore,

except for your
hatbox, Professor.

You'd better give me

a few seconds
to look around.

Yes, sir.

Now, Voltaire,
the glass pellet.

That's not Professor Neilsen.

Don't worry, I'm
not going to bite it.

Peter Piper picked a
peck of pickled peppers.

There he is
with the hatbox.

The carriage
is this way, sir.

Excuse me, Miss.

Oh...

Oh, my yarn.

Away, Voltaire, away.

That'll be all,
thank you...

for now.

Yes, sir.

You feeling all right?

Why would anyone want
to hurt the professor?

He was so kind.

You been his secretary
for long?

Five years.

I just can't
believe he's dead.

I felt so close to him.

You may be closer than you know.

Whoever killed the professor
may be itchy about you, too.

Lock your door.

You mean
I'm in danger?

Well, maybe
in more ways than one.

All I can be is killed.

That's no way to die.

Can you suggest
a better way?

Well, we could try
the restaurant downstairs.

Well, just give me
a chance to freshen up.

I'll be in the next room.

You're not to leave here
without telling me.

Nowhere without
telling you-

I promise, Mr. West.

For you.

Mr. West?

It's me, Miss Lundquist...

uh, Greta.

I'm, uh, still too
upset for dinner.

I was wondering
if, after I change,

we could take
a short walk first.

Of course,
Miss Lundquist.

A walk should be
very healthy for both of us.

What'll you do now?

Where will you go?

I don't know.

I... I have nobody,
nothing.

Oh, yes, you do.

You've got me.

Let's just call it
"protective custody."

How protective is
protective custody, Mr. West?

Greta?

Greta!

What do they think
this is, hunting season?

Well, you'd look pretty funny
stuffed over a mantelpiece.

Get in.

Don't touch that!

As a matter of fact,
I'd be very careful

with that whole armrest
if I were you.

Specially designed coach,

which I made just
for your use, James.

I'll brief you on it later,
if you live that long.

Now, what
about Neilsen?

When Neilsen told Washington
he had discovered

the most powerful
explosive known to man,

we thought he was the only one
that had the secret.

Obviously wrong now.

The man that killed him
must have it, too.

And he's going
to be very unhappy

unless he's the only one
that keeps it.

He's unhappy about you, James.

With you walking around,

there's always a danger
that you might foul him up.

He'd like to see you dead
before you find out who he is.

It's not my life
I'm worried about, Artemus.

With an explosive like
that in the wrong hands,

one man- just one man-

could bring a whole nation
to its knees.

What happened to you?

Oh, I was,
uh, frightened.

I ran to get help.

Like an undertaker?

No, I... I could see
you were in trouble.

I didn't want you
to get hurt.

Not to be made
a monkey of.

Oh, I'm so relieved.

That makes two of us.

Going someplace?

Yes, this place frightens me.

I just want to go
someplace and hide.

Now, hiding out
can be pretty lonely.

Remember your promise not to go
anyplace... without me?

Yes, I know, but, uh...

I think it's better
if I go alone.

What if I told you
the professor gave me his secret

before we got
off the ship?

That's not possible.

The professor
didn't tell anybody.

I've got it in a nice,
safe, comfortable place.

Well then, why come to me
with your papers?

I'm not interested in them,
your government is.

Except I don't want to share
the papers with my government.

But I might... with your friend.

What friend?

I don't have any friends here.

Too bad.

Well...

I guess I'll just
have to shop around

to the highest bidder.

France, Prussia, England
- makes no difference.

Mr. West.

It's such a foolish request.

It's like
a death wish.

My friend...
can be very angry.

He loves
his privacy.

He might even be angry
with me for bringing you.

Trust me.

He can be
very dangerous.

I can take care
of both of us.

Yes, I think you can.

Suddenly I'm being convinced,
my smavarmt.

Smavarmt?

That means a nice
little warm dish.

You know, to nibble on
before the main course.

Dinner will have to wait.

My coach is waiting.

We'll use
my driver, darling.

Your driver.

Now take me
to your killer.

It's all right,
Voltaire.

Thanks.

This is the doctor's
regular hour

at the game room,

but he should be
finished by now.

Oh, it would be
so easy.

Pop, pop.

Thank you very much.

I'm ever so grateful.

Ah, Greta,
you've done

what I was
unable to do.

You've brought
Mr. West...

but with one
serious oversight.

You've brought
him alive.

However...

Welcome, sir, welcome.

I'm Dr. Miguelito
Loveless.

Somehow I have
the feeling

you know all about me.

Oh, my, yes.

But then, I'm a man
of huge curiosity.

I love to pry into things.

I have almost
a loathing

for unanswered
questions.

And you, just
by being here, raise

the most fascinating
questions in my mind.

Oh, won't you
sit down, please?

Greta, will
you pour?

That's lovely,
Antoinette.

She has such a delicate touch,
you know, like tickling.

Milk, Mr. West?

No, thank you.

Oh, plenty of sugar
in mine, please, Greta.

You know, that's one thing
I have no hypocrisies about-

my pleasures.

No man does, darling.

You admire my music
salon, Mr. West?

Well, as much
as I can see of it.

Oh, how tactful you can be.

Well, at the risk
of my being tactless,

I don't think
Greta's charms-

considerable
though they may be-

were sufficient
to bring you here.

Greta is impulsive-

yes, passionately so-
but she's not stupid.

What wiles did you play on her?

Professor
Neilsen's secret.

Well, I admire your courage.

The way you expose
yourself to danger-

like last night,
when you put yourself

in Professor
Neilsen's place

coming
off the boat,

and the way
you've come here unarmed.

You are unarmed, aren't you?

Would you like
to search me?

Oh, no.

I never subject my visitors
to such indignities.

It's never gentlemanly
or necessary.

Yes, I can see that.

I thought so.

Now, you were saying something

about Professor
Neilsen's secret.

Oh, there's a fly in my tea.

Oh, poor fellow.

You know, uh,
poor Professor Neilsen

really was
a second-rate chemist.

After fumbling
about for ten years,

he finally stumbled
onto the secret,

while I took three months
from my other projects,

three whole months
of my valuable time,

mind you, to invent it...

then, after all that trouble,
found that Professor Neilsen

was planning to sell it
to Washington.

Don't worry,
you're going to be all right.

So, can you blame me
for being quite peeved,

Mr. West?

I understood
that Professor Neilsen

was going to work
with the government,

perfecting it
for peaceful purposes.

Peaceful purposes!

An explosive like that

in the hands of politicians
and generals?

What kind of peace can you
expect from the likes of them?

They're vermin-
they ought to be exterminated,

every one of them.

Oh, all right, I hear you.

You'll be all right.

Oh, that was
lovely, Antoinette.

♪ Bring me
little water, Sylvie ♪

♪ Bring me little water now ♪

♪ Bring me
little water, Sylvie ♪

♪ Every little once in a while ♪

♪ Bring it in a bucket, Sylvie ♪

♪ Bring it in a bucket now ♪

♪ Bring it in a bucket, Sylvie ♪

♪ Every little once in a while ♪

♪ Bring me
little water, Sylvie ♪

♪ Bring me little water now ♪

♪ Bring me
little water, Sylvie ♪

♪ Every little once in a while ♪

♪ Bring it in a bucket, Sylvie ♪

♪ Bring it in a bucket now ♪

♪ Bring it in a bucket, Sylvie ♪

♪ Every little once in a while ♪

♪ Sylvie, Sylvie,
I'm so hot and dry ♪

♪ Sylvie, Sylvie ♪

♪ Bring me little water ♪

♪ Can't you hear me calling ♪

♪ Bring me
little water, Sylvie ♪

♪ Bring me little water now ♪

♪ Bring me
little water, Sylvie ♪

♪ Every little once in a while ♪

♪ She brought me plenty coffee ♪

♪ She brought me plenty tea ♪

♪ She brought me
almost every darn thing ♪

♪ But she didn't bring the
jailhouse key, Lord, Lord ♪

♪ Didn't bring
the jailhouse key ♪

♪ Bring me
little water, Sylvie ♪

♪ Bring me little water now ♪

♪ Bring me
little water, Sylvie ♪

♪ Every little once
in a while. ♪

Oh, that was lovely, Antoinette.

Thank you.

Miguelito is really

very
tender-hearted.

Sometimes he is
like a child.

Sometimes he is a saint.

I love to make beautiful
things, Mr. West...

with my voice, with my
hands, with my brain.

Someday
I'll show you

some of them
in my laboratory,

if you're
still around.

I'll make it a point to be.

Now, you were saying something

about the professor's
so-called secret.

I have them.

He gave me the papers.

Hmm.

At last, a small light
begins to glow

in the dark corners
of my benighted mind.

And, Mr. West?

And...

I'm not the idealist
the professor was.

Ah, a realist.

Practical.

Practicality,
my dear sir,

is the last refuge
of the mediocre, not you.

A pragmatist,
perhaps.

A pragmatist
spelled m-o-n-e-y.

Oh, of course,
and the precious document

is in the hands
of a trusted friend,

with orders to turn it over
to the proper authorities,

should anything untoward
happen to you.

That's the general
idea, mm-hmm.

James West, trusted Secret
Service man, a turncoat.

It boggles the brain!

Why?

Of course,
they do pay poorly,

and you're hoping
I can be more generous.

You or, uh, some
foreign government.

You mean you would sell
this remarkable invention

to a foreign government
for money?

I'm ashamed of you.

I'd prefer to sell
my papers to you.

You know, I have an enormous
amount of faith in human nature.

But then all faith must have
a little doubt mixed in,

don't you think?

Otherwise it's just
flabby sentimentality.

So you will permit me
a small doubt, Mr. West?

Go ahead.

A small test of your loyalty

and then perhaps
we can negotiate.

Agreed?

Agreed.

I want you to take a message
to the governor-

something I've had in
mind for many weeks now.

Your status as
a Secret Service man

may serve to
impress upon him

the enormous importance
of this message.

I'm beginning
to enjoy this already.

Mr. West, you may be
a godsend after all.

What's the message?

All this... once belonged
to my grandmother,

Doña María
Concepción de Vega,

and to her brothers
and to their wives.

I am the only one
of her descendants left.

The Spanish crown
took it,

and now that the state of
California owns it, I want it back.

But the state refuses
to return it- piracy.

It's mostly desert.

Even if they did
give it back to you,

what would you
want with it?

I only want
to do good-

not for myself,
for children.

I want to build a kingdom
for children to grow,

to be strong and healthy
in a world without pain.

And if the governor
refuses?

It's up to you to
convince him, Mr. West.

I already have planted
explosives in this city

that will kill 5,000
people tomorrow night

and an additional 5,000

every week after that
until he agrees.

It's in your hands,
my dear friend.

Here is the governor,
Mr. West.

Governor,
I'm sorry

to interrupt
your party, sir.

Well, the government
before state, Mr. West.

What can I do for you?

Well, what I have to tell you

isn't going to be easy
to swallow.

Try me.

5,000 people in this city
are going to be blown up.

Five thou...

Uh, Mr. West, do all Secret
Service men drink on duty?

Governor, I said 5,000 people
are going to be killed.

Governor, you forgot
your wine- our wine.

And you promised me
the next waltz.

Why, um...

Uh, uh... why...

Why don't you lovely ladies
go inside and wait for me

and I'll... I'll be along
in just a moment, huh?

Go ahead.

There's a powerful explosive
hidden somewhere in the city

timed to go off
tonight.

And who is going to perform
this miraculous deed?

A scientist named Dr. Loveless.

Why?

He feels he's been robbed of
half the state, and he wants you

to give it
back to him.

And you expect me to do this?

No.

I expect you to give me 25 men
to surround his estate,

so no one
can get out

to set off
the explosion.

Well, surround him?

Well... well, why not just
go in and take this madman?

Anyone that tried
would be blown up.

The place is mined.

Miss Piecemeal... get me
a pen and some paper, please.

Mr. West... this is
an authorization

to the commander
of the state army.

Miss Piecemeal,
will you affix

the state seal
to that, please?

Good luck.

Thank you, Governor.

Are you always this amusing?

I do the best I can.

Why don't you find me amusing?

Because you're 80% water.

Mr. West.

The good doctor calls.

My coach, gentlemen?

Marcia, lovely.

How are you?

How did you enjoy
your breakfast

this morning, darling?

Hmm?

Excuse me,
lovely.

I know the governor
is an idiot,

but I had wanted to
give him a chance,

and you, Mr. West.

But you betrayed me.

Now, whatever am I
going to do with you?

Is there any question
in your mind?

Oh, the explosive
will go off as planned.

You could have prevented it,
but you chose to betray me.

Me- of all
people, me.

Now, look about
you, Mr. West.

I promised to show you
these things one day.

This little
invention of mine

may seem
like a fairy tale to you,

but with this I can project
and receive voices and music

through the air.

Just think of the pleasure
and enlightenment

this can bring
to countless people.

And this...

To anyone else, this would seem
only like mold, bread mold.

But this is a
medicine so potent

that with it
one can begin

to conquer all
illness, Mr. West.

And over there,
a machine that one day

will travel over roads
by its own power,

and there,
a machine

that will fly
through the air.

Yes.

All these
things I built

for a better
world, Mr. West.

And you wanted
to stop all this

by trying to go
to the police.

I just can't
believe it.

Come.

My explosive.

With this I can
move mountains

and change the
course of rivers,

blast channels for the waters of
life to flow into dry deserts.

I can make a world
without blemish,

where children
can grow up in beauty.

Oh, how I hate
any twisted thing, Mr. West.

I've lived so long with pain,
I no longer feel it.

It's time to go into the city.

I'll have Greta
bring you some supper.

What's to stop me from
just walking out of here?

I do admire
your courage.

By 12:00 tonight,

5,000 people will be dead
because you betrayed me.

The blood of 5,000 people
on your hands.

I want you to realize this
terrible thing you've done.

I want you to suffer.

After you've suffered enough,
you will beg me for death.

I brought you some supper.

I can't use my hands.

Are you going to
let me out of here?

No.

I'm going to feed you.

Like this.

Excuse my fingers.

They're beautiful fingers.

Nice little warm dish
before the main course.

Naughty.

More, please.

You like my smavarmt?

Mmm...

I love your smavarmt.

It's been lonely here
with Miguelito.

It's going to be
a lot lonelier

after I'm dead.

I know.

It isn't fair

to a beautiful
woman like you.

You know some women die
early from being unloved?

I know what
you're trying to do.

You want me
to let you out.

But even if I wanted to,
I couldn't-

I don't have a key.

There's a pencil
in my coat pocket.

Get it.

No.

After I'm dead, it
may be a long time

before another man
comes along.

Get it, Greta,
get the pencil.

No.

I'm the lucky
one, Greta-

he's going
to kill me,

but you still have
to go on living here.

Beautiful face
will wrinkle,

those lovely hands
will wither,

and your heart will
shrink from loneliness.

Poor Greta...

an old woman...
and unloved.

This is your only
chance for love, Greta.

That's what you
want, isn't it?

Just turn it.

That's it...

Now, put the drill
right here.

Right here, Greta.

That's it.

The guards are watching.

Keep drilling
and feed me.

Where did Dr. Loveless
hide the explosive?

In the, uh, clock tower
in a church

next to the governor's mansion.

Where are the stables?

Near the east wing.

I'm almost finished.

There... it's cut.

Take the tray
and leave.

Don't worry,
you'll be all right;

I'll come back for you.

The great Jim West.

Pretty, isn't he?

Yeah.

You?

Now, that bullet will go
right through me

and detonate these bottles.

Besides, you don't
have the heart

for killing someone like me.

I don't.

But if it's a choice

between you and
5,000 people,

I'll pull this trigger.

Now, don't be
a fool, Mr. West.

I can go right
through that window

and down
the rain gutter.

There are only
a few minutes left.

You go near that window
and I'll shoot you.

Take the wires
off those bottles.

No.

I said take the wires
off those bottles.

You can't make me.

Then we'll wait here together.

Oh, I, for one,
am not afraid

to die, Mr. West,
not in the very least.

That's my walking stick.

Now, you leave that alone!

Only a minute
to go, Mr. West.

Oh, careful you
don't fall, Mr. West.

Less than a minute
to go, Mr. West.

That's the striking
mechanism of the clock

you hear
winding up now.

Less than a minute to go now.

On the 12th stroke
of midnight,

everything goes.

Darn you!

Come on!

Oh, start.

Start!

Drat it! Start!

Oh, start.

Start!

Seven...

Eight...

You meddler!

You interfering
meddler!

You...

vile... egregious...

Secret Service man!

Oh, Artemus,
there you are.

Yes.

We were just about
to have a late supper.

Yes, so I notice.

Everything go
all right?

Oh, fine, fine.

He's in jail.

Strange, little,
sensitive man.

You know, he walked
into that cell

carrying just
one thing-

this oddly shaped
glass tube.

Couldn't get it
out of his hands.

Oh, yes, that's another
of his inventions.

What was it?

I don't know.

Kept saying that,
given enough time,

he could send pictures
through the air,

catch them in that tube.

Have you ever heard
of anything that silly?

Supper.

Oh, good.

What is it?

Smorgasbord.

Smorgasbord...

My favorite food.

Wonderful.

You know...

the one thing
about smorgasbord...

it's marvelous...