Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,355 --> 00:00:05,996
- [ Rings]
- Hello?
2
00:01:12,592 --> 00:01:17,302
I don't understand. lfwe set the clock radio
for 7:00, why are we getting up at 8:00?
3
00:01:17,364 --> 00:01:20,573
Because I set it on an F.M. station.
I'll never do that again.
4
00:01:20,634 --> 00:01:24,878
You know, it's hard to wake up
to the entire ballet of Sleeping Beauty
5
00:01:24,938 --> 00:01:29,182
For the last hour, I was dreaming a guy
on a white horse was gonna kiss me.
6
00:01:29,242 --> 00:01:33,418
- Me too.
- Yeah, but for you it's not a nightmare.
7
00:01:33,480 --> 00:01:35,551
Well, that's all the time
I have for the paper.
8
00:01:35,615 --> 00:01:38,755
- I still have time to get dressed and
still catch my train. - [Knocking]
9
00:01:38,819 --> 00:01:41,459
Oh, swell.
10
00:01:41,521 --> 00:01:43,558
Hi, Bob.
I just got back from Tokyo.
11
00:01:43,623 --> 00:01:48,163
Great. I can't wait to hear
all about it. Excuse me, Howard.
12
00:01:48,228 --> 00:01:50,834
Hi, Howard.
Back from Tokyo already?
13
00:01:50,897 --> 00:01:54,606
I just got back this minute. Surprised you didn't
hear me. I flew right over the building.
14
00:01:54,668 --> 00:01:57,046
- You know there's a Frisbee on our roof?
- No kidding?
15
00:01:57,103 --> 00:02:00,050
And a whole lot ofotherjunk. You'd think
people would take more pride in their roof.
16
00:02:00,106 --> 00:02:02,052
We have the dirtiest one
in the neighborhood.
17
00:02:02,108 --> 00:02:05,578
When it's ready, pouryourseifa cup.
Bob and I are in kind of a rush this morning.
18
00:02:05,645 --> 00:02:08,148
I just came over to pick up
my mail and newspapers.
19
00:02:08,215 --> 00:02:11,287
Pouryourselfa cup of coffee. Emily and I
are in kind of a rush this morning.
20
00:02:11,351 --> 00:02:13,456
I just came over to pick up
my mail and newspapers.
21
00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:16,933
- The papers are there. There wasn't any mail.
- Did I get any phone calls?
22
00:02:16,990 --> 00:02:20,699
- Just one. Lois Borden.
- Lois Borden. Lois Borden.
23
00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:23,400
- Your ex-wife.
- Oh.
24
00:02:24,865 --> 00:02:27,311
She wanted to know
if you could pick up your son...
25
00:02:27,367 --> 00:02:29,472
and have him tomorrow and the next day
instead of over the weekend.
26
00:02:29,536 --> 00:02:33,211
Howie! I would love to!
I'll pick him up first thing in the morning.
27
00:02:33,273 --> 00:02:36,311
Wait. How can I? I don't have anything
planned. What am I gonna do with him?
28
00:02:36,376 --> 00:02:38,322
Howard, what do you have to plan
for an eight-year-old?
29
00:02:38,378 --> 00:02:40,790
I like to make his visits interesting.
30
00:02:40,847 --> 00:02:44,260
You're an interesting person, Emily.
Can you think of anything interesting to do?
31
00:02:44,317 --> 00:02:46,263
- For who to do?
- For Howie and me.
32
00:02:46,319 --> 00:02:49,823
- What do you usually do?
- The last time I took him to the zoo...
33
00:02:49,890 --> 00:02:53,997
the Museum of Science and Industry,
to the auto show-- then we had lunch.
34
00:02:54,060 --> 00:02:56,131
You did all that before lunch?
35
00:02:56,196 --> 00:02:58,472
I had to.
The Ice Capades started at 1 :00.
36
00:02:58,531 --> 00:03:01,569
Maybe it isn't necessary
to do so much.
37
00:03:01,635 --> 00:03:06,414
Are you kidding? I have four days a month
to undo what Lois does on the other 27.
38
00:03:06,473 --> 00:03:08,419
I gotta make that kid like me.
39
00:03:08,475 --> 00:03:11,922
- Emily, do you know we're out of toothpaste?
- You're gonna have to use soap.
40
00:03:11,978 --> 00:03:14,458
I did. Blech!
41
00:03:14,514 --> 00:03:17,586
I guess it's my turn. Blech!
42
00:03:17,651 --> 00:03:21,121
Bob, do you think the circus
is too violent for an eight-year-old?
43
00:03:21,187 --> 00:03:24,259
Don't think it matters.
That's Sunday's paper. The circus closes today.
44
00:03:24,324 --> 00:03:27,328
Oh, swell. What am I
gonna do with him anyway?
45
00:03:27,394 --> 00:03:29,874
You and your son
could watch 'em tear it down.
46
00:03:29,930 --> 00:03:33,139
Dismantling?
That sounds constructive.
47
00:03:33,199 --> 00:03:35,702
I just hope his mother doesn't tell him
I did it to save money.
48
00:03:35,769 --> 00:03:37,942
- Why would she do that?
- She's still mad at me.
49
00:03:38,004 --> 00:03:41,451
She thinks it's my fault the marriage didn't work
out because of my flying all the time.
50
00:03:41,508 --> 00:03:45,046
- How could it be my fault? I was never at home.
- Mm-hmm.
51
00:03:45,111 --> 00:03:47,819
You know something?
I think she's turning the kid against me.
52
00:03:47,881 --> 00:03:51,260
- You know what he did last month?
He called me “sir.“ - Who?
53
00:03:51,318 --> 00:03:54,697
- Howie. - Maybe it was because
you were wearing your uniform.
54
00:03:54,754 --> 00:03:58,031
You know something?
I never thought of that.
55
00:03:58,091 --> 00:04:00,037
I won't wear the uniform.
56
00:04:00,093 --> 00:04:03,040
Ah, but I gotta wear the hat.
57
00:04:03,096 --> 00:04:07,010
Howiejust loves that hat.
You know what he does, Emily?
58
00:04:07,067 --> 00:04:10,241
Well, he takes the hoop out,
you know.
59
00:04:10,303 --> 00:04:13,807
And, uh, well, he gets his fingerprints
all over the brim.
60
00:04:13,873 --> 00:04:17,548
I say, “You gotta pick it up
by the edges, like a record."
61
00:04:17,610 --> 00:04:21,717
But every time I get it back--
Ah, well. What the heck.
62
00:04:21,781 --> 00:04:25,729
He's my son, and I love him and he loves
the hat. Know what I mean, Bob?
63
00:04:25,785 --> 00:04:30,063
Yeah, I love my hat too, Howard.
It's getting kind of late, Howard.
64
00:04:30,123 --> 00:04:32,399
Oh, what am I doing?
65
00:04:32,459 --> 00:04:35,531
I'm sorry. I'm keeping you folks up.
It's I 1:30 at night.
66
00:04:35,595 --> 00:04:37,597
Howard, are you still
on Tokyo time?
67
00:04:37,664 --> 00:04:39,940
Of course.
It's still yesterday morning here.
68
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:43,914
Feel free to stay here and relax and enjoy it
all over again. Be sure and lock the door.
69
00:04:43,970 --> 00:04:47,076
Maybe I will. My legs are a little tired
from talking to you, folks.
70
00:04:59,819 --> 00:05:03,357
Mrs. Swan, now you just
fill out this form on both sides...
71
00:05:03,423 --> 00:05:05,869
and Dr. McGowen will be
with you in just a moment.
72
00:05:05,925 --> 00:05:09,498
And I thinkyou can disregard
“7“ where it asks...
73
00:05:09,562 --> 00:05:11,974
“What do you think is the cause
of your illness?“
74
00:05:17,037 --> 00:05:19,381
- Hi, Carol.
- HLJer.
75
00:05:19,439 --> 00:05:22,477
- Are you eating lunch here today or
are you going out? - I'm going out.
76
00:05:22,542 --> 00:05:24,886
Me too.
What time are you going?
77
00:05:24,944 --> 00:05:29,222
- 1:00.
- Me too. Uh, how much time are you gonna take?
78
00:05:29,282 --> 00:05:32,388
- About an hour.
- Me too.
79
00:05:32,452 --> 00:05:35,399
- I guess we can have lunch together then, huh?
- Fraid not,jer.
80
00:05:35,455 --> 00:05:37,731
Ah, gee. I was doing
so good until then.
81
00:05:37,791 --> 00:05:41,000
It's not personal.
lt'sjust that...
82
00:05:41,061 --> 00:05:44,008
I'm having lunch today
with a man I really care about.
83
00:05:47,667 --> 00:05:52,047
You know, Carol, someday you're really gonna
be sorry for the way you've been treating me...
84
00:05:52,105 --> 00:05:54,984
a respected member
of the dental profession and all.
85
00:05:55,041 --> 00:05:59,956
Someday you're gonna come crawling to me
on your hands and your knees with a big cavity.
86
00:06:00,013 --> 00:06:02,015
And I'm just gonna squirt
cold air on it.
87
00:06:04,818 --> 00:06:07,697
Hey, Bob.
How 'bout having some lunch?
88
00:06:07,754 --> 00:06:09,700
She turned you down again, huh?
89
00:06:09,756 --> 00:06:11,861
Yeah. That's no reason to starve.
90
00:06:13,326 --> 00:06:15,670
Howard}
Excuse me. Pardon me. Pardon me.
91
00:06:15,728 --> 00:06:18,072
Men coming out.
Men coming out. Here we are.
92
00:06:18,131 --> 00:06:20,509
Men coming out. Okay.
93
00:06:20,567 --> 00:06:23,343
- Hi, Bob. How areyou?
- H1; Howard H1; Howie.
94
00:06:23,403 --> 00:06:26,543
- Hi. -jerry, you remember Howard
Borden, junior and senior?
95
00:06:26,606 --> 00:06:28,677
- Uh-huh.
- Good seeing you again.
96
00:06:35,615 --> 00:06:38,289
- Oh, my goodness. This is terrible.
- It's not so terrible.
97
00:06:38,351 --> 00:06:41,161
It's better to have that stuff
on your shirt than on your teeth.
98
00:06:41,221 --> 00:06:43,565
Guess what we watched them
tear down all morning.
99
00:06:43,623 --> 00:06:46,661
The circus. You know, there's more
to cleaning up a circus than you think.
100
00:06:46,726 --> 00:06:50,333
Everybody pitches in-- the acrobats
and the clowns and the chimps.
101
00:06:50,396 --> 00:06:52,808
- Chimps?
- The chimps didn't do much work.
102
00:06:52,866 --> 00:06:55,472
They werejust there
to keep up the morale.
103
00:06:55,535 --> 00:06:57,515
That's very interesting.
What brings you here?
104
00:06:57,570 --> 00:07:00,574
It's lunchtime, and since lunch
is next on the agenda...
105
00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:03,678
we thought we'd askyou--
What are you doing for lunch?
106
00:07:03,743 --> 00:07:06,087
Jerry and I were
just going out to lunch.
107
00:07:06,146 --> 00:07:09,457
Well, why don't the four of us go?
just us guys.
108
00:07:09,516 --> 00:07:11,462
- You want a balloon?
- No, thank you.
109
00:07:11,518 --> 00:07:15,967
I've, uh, gotta get
this stuff off my shirt.
110
00:07:16,022 --> 00:07:18,298
- Be a good little guy till I get back, okay?
- Okay.
111
00:07:18,358 --> 00:07:21,999
Yeah. Which, uh-- Ah.
112
00:07:22,061 --> 00:07:24,007
- You want a balloon?
- Thanks.
113
00:07:24,063 --> 00:07:26,543
Okay. I'll just go change
into my civies.
114
00:07:29,335 --> 00:07:32,179
Howie, there's a trick to that.
115
00:07:37,644 --> 00:07:40,318
[Balloon Squeaking]
116
00:07:59,465 --> 00:08:02,674
You see, the trick is to do it
without hurting yourself.
117
00:08:04,604 --> 00:08:08,017
And the other trick
is to tie a knot in it...
118
00:08:08,074 --> 00:08:10,850
without getting your finger caught.
119
00:08:10,910 --> 00:08:13,481
- A lot of tricks to blowing up a balloon.
- Thank you.
120
00:08:13,546 --> 00:08:15,583
- So, where would you like to eat?
- I don't know.
121
00:08:15,648 --> 00:08:18,288
- What kind of food do you like?
- French fries.
122
00:08:18,351 --> 00:08:21,958
Well, we'll go
to a French restaurant.
123
00:08:24,224 --> 00:08:26,534
I got it all off, Bob.
124
00:08:32,198 --> 00:08:35,668
Does the stain look bad?
I don't want my son to see me stained.
125
00:08:37,337 --> 00:08:39,817
No one will ever notice, Howard.
126
00:08:39,872 --> 00:08:43,251
Howard, you got a big water spot
on your shirt there.
127
00:08:47,247 --> 00:08:49,853
Bob, is he going to keep putting me
down like that all day?
128
00:08:49,916 --> 00:08:53,159
Well, he was just trying to--
129
00:08:53,219 --> 00:08:55,597
You do have a big water stain
on your shirt.
130
00:08:55,655 --> 00:08:59,330
I know, but it might have dried
before my son noticed it.
131
00:08:59,392 --> 00:09:03,204
I've come too far to give it all up now. I can't afford
to have my son see anybody not like me.
132
00:09:03,263 --> 00:09:05,265
Howard, everyone likes you.
133
00:09:05,331 --> 00:09:08,244
Will you do me a favor
and quit trying to impress your son?
134
00:09:08,301 --> 00:09:10,338
Let's just have a nice,
relaxing lunch.
135
00:09:10,403 --> 00:09:12,610
Okay, we'll go and have
a nice relaxing lunch...
136
00:09:12,672 --> 00:09:15,118
and I won't try to impress my son.
137
00:09:15,174 --> 00:09:19,680
Okay, guys, we're all going to lunch,
and Daddy's picking up the check.
138
00:09:21,681 --> 00:09:26,687
Oh, what does the balloon say?
“I have been to my--“
139
00:09:26,753 --> 00:09:28,755
[Balloon Pops
140
00:09:35,561 --> 00:09:39,475
Well, uh, how do you like it, Son?
just us guys.
141
00:09:39,532 --> 00:09:42,570
- Real masculine, isn't it?
- Hello.
142
00:09:42,635 --> 00:09:45,775
- What's she doing here?
- I'm your waitress. Have you decided yet?
143
00:09:45,838 --> 00:09:48,250
- Yes, we've decided. I'll take it.
- You'll take what?
144
00:09:48,308 --> 00:09:51,346
- The check.
- We haven't even ordered yet, Howard.
145
00:09:51,411 --> 00:09:54,153
Oh. Well, when we do,
the check goes here.
146
00:09:54,213 --> 00:09:57,217
Yes, sir. The special today
is bouillabaisse.
147
00:09:57,283 --> 00:09:59,729
What's boola-- boola--
148
00:09:59,786 --> 00:10:02,096
That's a Yale fight song.
149
00:10:04,123 --> 00:10:06,899
I'll explain bouillabaisse to you.
You know the ocean?
150
00:10:06,959 --> 00:10:09,371
- Uh-huh.
- Well, it's a lot of stuff from the bottom.
151
00:10:11,564 --> 00:10:13,510
Anyway, you wouldn't like it.
Nobody does.
152
00:10:13,566 --> 00:10:16,046
I'll have the bouillabaisse.
153
00:10:16,102 --> 00:10:17,911
- Thank you.
- Bob.
154
00:10:17,970 --> 00:10:21,076
Howard, don't be so touchy.
I was gonna order the same--
155
00:10:23,343 --> 00:10:25,789
All right, I'll have
the special steak sandwich meal.
156
00:10:25,845 --> 00:10:28,883
Fine. Baked or French fries?
157
00:10:28,948 --> 00:10:30,985
French fries.
158
00:10:31,050 --> 00:10:33,724
What kind of dressing
on your salad?
159
00:10:33,786 --> 00:10:35,732
French.
160
00:10:35,788 --> 00:10:39,463
- Thank you. And what'll you have, young man?
- I'll order for both of us.
161
00:10:39,525 --> 00:10:42,665
First, a hamburger, French fries...
162
00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:45,335
and a big orange soda.
163
00:10:45,398 --> 00:10:49,778
And he'll have a hot dog,
French fries and a glass of milk.
164
00:10:49,836 --> 00:10:51,907
Fine. Thank you.
165
00:10:53,906 --> 00:10:56,512
Hey, Bob, did you see what the Bulls did
to the Lakers last night?
166
00:10:56,576 --> 00:11:01,150
Yeah, that was terrific.
Bob Love got what, 32, 33 points?
167
00:11:01,214 --> 00:11:02,955
- Thirty-five.
- No kidding?
168
00:11:03,015 --> 00:11:06,895
- And he was 14 out ofl 8 from the floor.
- Wow.
169
00:11:06,953 --> 00:11:08,990
You're really a basketball fan.
Me too.
170
00:11:09,055 --> 00:11:11,831
- Sloan really gave West a fit, didn't he?
- Yeah.
171
00:11:11,891 --> 00:11:15,100
You watch the game
on TV last night, Howard?
172
00:11:15,161 --> 00:11:19,576
No, I was busy sleeping after navigating
a big jetliner back fromjapan.
173
00:11:19,632 --> 00:11:23,603
- Huh?
- Howard's a navigator on a bigjetliner.
174
00:11:23,669 --> 00:11:25,478
- Really?
- Really.
175
00:11:25,538 --> 00:11:28,951
I thought they were gonna blow it in the
third quarter. Walker couldn't buy a basket.
176
00:11:29,008 --> 00:11:31,614
That's because
he was being guarded too close.
177
00:11:31,677 --> 00:11:33,623
Oh, he could have gotten
around some of those guys.
178
00:11:33,679 --> 00:11:36,182
He should havejust driven right in him.
Laid 'em right out.
179
00:11:36,249 --> 00:11:38,195
Wow. Yeah.
180
00:11:38,251 --> 00:11:41,164
I once flew the Green Bay Packers
from Green Bay to Detroit.
181
00:11:43,689 --> 00:11:46,033
It was a big exhibition game.
182
00:11:46,092 --> 00:11:48,663
- No kidding, Howard.
- Their regular charter plane broke down...
183
00:11:48,728 --> 00:11:50,901
and we had to get in there
at the last minute and save 'em.
184
00:11:50,963 --> 00:11:53,068
It was quite exciting.
185
00:11:55,168 --> 00:11:58,445
- Who won?
- Detroit. Uh--
186
00:11:58,504 --> 00:12:01,678
Green Bay. One of them.
I'm not much on sports.
187
00:12:02,542 --> 00:12:04,180
- Daddy?
- Yes.
188
00:12:04,243 --> 00:12:06,849
- I have to go to the bathroom.
- I'll show you where it is.
189
00:12:06,913 --> 00:12:10,759
- Can he take me?
- Oh,yeah, sure, Howie.
190
00:12:12,318 --> 00:12:15,663
Anyway, Howie, Goodrich may be quick,
but I like a guy like Weiss.
191
00:12:15,721 --> 00:12:18,224
He just plops 'em right in there
from the outside.
192
00:12:18,291 --> 00:12:20,430
I used to play a little ball myself
when I was younger.
193
00:12:20,493 --> 00:12:22,700
[indistinct]
194
00:12:25,131 --> 00:12:27,577
I lost him.
195
00:12:28,768 --> 00:12:31,305
Howard, he'sjust
taking him to the bathroom.
196
00:12:34,073 --> 00:12:37,680
I know kids. They go to the bathroom
with who they like best.
197
00:12:37,743 --> 00:12:40,087
I lost my son, Bob.
198
00:12:48,688 --> 00:12:50,929
Emily, you deal with kids a lot.
199
00:12:50,990 --> 00:12:53,402
I mean, you get along
with them, right?
200
00:12:53,459 --> 00:12:55,405
Well, I didn't do so well today.
201
00:12:55,461 --> 00:12:57,463
I gave a kid a “D“
in a spelling test...
202
00:12:57,530 --> 00:13:02,275
and after school he wrote an obscene word
in the dust on my car.
203
00:13:04,337 --> 00:13:06,283
How do you know
it was the same kid?
204
00:13:06,339 --> 00:13:09,343
Because he misspelled it.
205
00:13:11,010 --> 00:13:13,581
But usually they write nice words
in the dust on your car.
206
00:13:13,646 --> 00:13:17,458
- Yeah. - I think Howard's having
a big problem with his son.
207
00:13:17,517 --> 00:13:22,193
- Howie? What's wrong with little Howie?
- His father.
208
00:13:22,255 --> 00:13:26,169
Howard got so depressed today becausejerry,
he took his son to the bathroom.
209
00:13:26,225 --> 00:13:29,434
I mean, he wants everything
to be so perfect.
210
00:13:29,495 --> 00:13:33,136
Bob, that's ridiculous.
Nobody can be that perfect.
211
00:13:33,199 --> 00:13:35,372
- [ Ringing]
- You finished, honey?
212
00:13:35,434 --> 00:13:37,436
Yeah.
213
00:13:39,438 --> 00:13:41,918
Hello?
214
00:13:41,974 --> 00:13:44,853
Oh, hello, Howard.
215
00:13:44,911 --> 00:13:47,585
Howard?
216
00:13:47,647 --> 00:13:49,593
- “Swam.
- [Knocking]
217
00:13:49,649 --> 00:13:52,220
- Come in.
- Howard!
218
00:13:52,285 --> 00:13:54,287
Hi, Bob.
219
00:13:57,823 --> 00:14:01,327
- Howard, Why'd you call me and then hang up?
- Wanted to see if you were home.
220
00:14:02,662 --> 00:14:04,801
-I am.
- I know.
221
00:14:04,864 --> 00:14:08,437
Bob, Emily, can you do me a favor?
Can you take care of Howie for a while?
222
00:14:08,501 --> 00:14:10,879
- Yeah. What's up?
- I have to fly to St. Louis tonight.
223
00:14:10,937 --> 00:14:14,248
- I have to fill in for a guy that has the Asian flu.
- That's too bad.
224
00:14:14,307 --> 00:14:16,787
I know.
St. Louis is a drag.
225
00:14:16,842 --> 00:14:18,981
I'm so upset. I don't know
what's the matter with me.
226
00:14:19,045 --> 00:14:22,049
I can't get myself together.
I can't get myself organized.
227
00:14:22,114 --> 00:14:24,094
St. Louis isn't even on
my regular run.
228
00:14:24,150 --> 00:14:27,791
I think it's down
and a little to the right, Howard.
229
00:14:33,659 --> 00:14:35,605
I sure hate to leave Howie like this.
230
00:14:35,661 --> 00:14:38,608
Do you have any idea
when Lois is gonna pick him up?
231
00:14:38,664 --> 00:14:40,735
Lois? Lois.
232
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:44,475
- Howie's mother.
- Oh. Yes. No.
233
00:14:44,537 --> 00:14:46,710
- Which is it, Howard?
- I don't know.
234
00:14:46,772 --> 00:14:51,482
I called her and she wasn't home,
sol left a message with her answering service.
235
00:14:51,544 --> 00:14:54,957
Oh, boy. I've been so upset lately.
236
00:14:55,014 --> 00:14:57,654
- Could you give me a scotch and water?
- Yeah.
237
00:14:57,717 --> 00:15:00,459
No, wait a minute. I'm flying tonight.
just give me the water.
238
00:15:02,622 --> 00:15:04,898
Where's Howie now?
239
00:15:04,957 --> 00:15:06,937
In my apartment sleeping.
240
00:15:06,993 --> 00:15:10,600
I kept trying to read him a bedtime story,
and he kept falling asleep.
241
00:15:10,663 --> 00:15:13,837
- What's the matter with that kid?
- Here's your water, Howard.
242
00:15:18,871 --> 00:15:20,817
[Exhales Loudly]
243
00:15:20,873 --> 00:15:22,819
Well, that didn't
seem to help at all.
244
00:15:24,577 --> 00:15:26,648
Howard,just try and relax.
245
00:15:26,712 --> 00:15:30,387
Now, the next time you have Howie,
I'm sure everything will go much smoother.
246
00:15:30,449 --> 00:15:32,952
There may not be a next time.
247
00:15:33,019 --> 00:15:35,295
Bob, you're a psychologist.
248
00:15:35,354 --> 00:15:38,358
They say there are a lot of psychological things
in kids' pictures.
249
00:15:38,424 --> 00:15:43,203
Howie drew this tonight, and
I would like your professional opinion.
250
00:15:43,262 --> 00:15:46,675
If you could tell me some of the hidden
meanings, some of the symbolisms.
251
00:15:46,732 --> 00:15:48,678
Tell me what the picture
really means to you.
252
00:15:48,734 --> 00:15:52,375
L-- I think it's cute.
253
00:15:52,438 --> 00:15:55,214
Cute? lfl wanted “cute,“
I would have asked Emily.
254
00:15:55,274 --> 00:15:58,744
Howard, what's wrong with it?
It's a picture of Howie holding your hand.
255
00:15:58,811 --> 00:16:02,190
No. He's holdingjerrys hand
on the way to the bathroom.
256
00:16:02,248 --> 00:16:06,196
And that's me up in the little airplane
flying away from my son.
257
00:16:06,252 --> 00:16:08,789
Howard, this whole thing
is out of proportion.
258
00:16:08,854 --> 00:16:12,301
He drew it in five minutes.
You can't expect it to be perfect.
259
00:16:13,926 --> 00:16:16,600
Bob, you have to admit this thing
goes a lot deeper than cute.
260
00:16:16,662 --> 00:16:18,767
All right, I'll give you
my professional opinion.
261
00:16:20,099 --> 00:16:22,409
Howie is holding
Jerry's hand...
262
00:16:22,468 --> 00:16:26,314
and going to the bathroom because
that's what happened at lunch today.
263
00:16:26,372 --> 00:16:28,374
And you're flying away
on an airplane...
264
00:16:28,441 --> 00:16:30,751
because you're gonna be flying away
on an airplane in a little while.
265
00:16:30,810 --> 00:16:34,815
- Uh-huh.
- The only thing I can't figure out is...
266
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:39,090
who's the person with the cape
and the big red “S“ on the chest.
267
00:16:39,151 --> 00:16:41,290
Oh, that's his mother.
He thinks the world of her.
268
00:16:45,758 --> 00:16:48,762
Bob, I wonder where Howie is.
269
00:16:48,828 --> 00:16:50,432
[Giggling]
270
00:16:50,496 --> 00:16:54,069
I don't know.
He just disappeared.
271
00:16:54,133 --> 00:16:56,773
Maybe he's under the carpet.
272
00:16:56,836 --> 00:16:59,715
I don't think so. It's wall-to-wall.
He'd have to burrow under it.
273
00:16:59,772 --> 00:17:03,481
Oh. Maybe he's in the coffeepot.
274
00:17:03,542 --> 00:17:06,148
-[Giggling]
- No, he's not in there.
275
00:17:06,212 --> 00:17:08,624
[Giggling Continues]
276
00:17:08,681 --> 00:17:11,787
Bob, I think I'm gonna have to give up.
How about you?
277
00:17:11,851 --> 00:17:14,923
- Yeah, I don't know where he is.
- Here I am.
278
00:17:14,987 --> 00:17:18,025
- Oh, what a surprise.
- You fooled us.
279
00:17:18,090 --> 00:17:20,627
Let's play it again.
280
00:17:21,961 --> 00:17:24,271
Yeah, that'll be
a nice change of pace.
281
00:17:25,898 --> 00:17:28,344
No fair peeking.
282
00:17:33,038 --> 00:17:35,746
Doorbell Buzzes 1
283
00:17:35,808 --> 00:17:38,812
- How'd he get out there?
- That must be his mother.
284
00:17:40,579 --> 00:17:42,616
- Hello.
- Hi. Are you the Hartleys?
285
00:17:42,681 --> 00:17:45,787
- I'm Emily. This is Bob.
- I'm Lois Borden, Howie's mother.
286
00:17:45,851 --> 00:17:47,922
Oh, hello.
Please, come in.
287
00:17:47,987 --> 00:17:51,992
I'm sorry about all the confusion.
I do appreciate your looking after Howie.
288
00:17:52,057 --> 00:17:55,470
Don't be silly. He's so nice,
you don't even know he's around.
289
00:17:55,528 --> 00:17:57,906
I was noticing that.
Where is he?
290
00:17:57,963 --> 00:18:00,534
- I don't know.
- What?
291
00:18:00,599 --> 00:18:02,738
Oh, no. He's hiding,
but he's very easy to find.
292
00:18:02,802 --> 00:18:04,748
We werejust playing
hide-and-go-seek.
293
00:18:04,804 --> 00:18:07,978
Well, Howie loves that.
He could play it all night.
294
00:18:08,040 --> 00:18:10,042
He has been.
295
00:18:10,109 --> 00:18:14,080
- Why don't I make us some fresh coffee?
- Thank you, if it's no trouble.
296
00:18:14,146 --> 00:18:17,491
- It's no trouble at all. Please, sit down.
- Thanks.
297
00:18:19,852 --> 00:18:24,426
Well, you, uh--
you seem very nice.
298
00:18:28,994 --> 00:18:31,372
Well, uh, I am nice.
299
00:18:31,430 --> 00:18:35,378
No, no, I didn't mean that.
It's just we didn't expect--
300
00:18:35,434 --> 00:18:37,380
Howard had led us to believe--
301
00:18:37,436 --> 00:18:41,578
I know what you mean.
You were expecting the dragon lady.
302
00:18:41,640 --> 00:18:44,280
- How is Howard?
- You see him, don't you?
303
00:18:44,343 --> 00:18:47,950
Well, only to say hello and good-bye,
sort of like our marriage.
304
00:18:48,013 --> 00:18:52,018
It must be rough being married
to someone who's somewhere else.
305
00:18:52,084 --> 00:18:55,691
Well, it's not the ideal marriage
when the wife is sleeping in Chicago...
306
00:18:55,754 --> 00:18:59,133
and the husband
is sleeping in Guam.
307
00:18:59,191 --> 00:19:01,296
Actually, we probably
wouldn't have had Howie...
308
00:19:01,360 --> 00:19:04,705
if it weren't for the great
airline strike of 1963.
309
00:19:06,198 --> 00:19:08,269
But I still think Howard
is basically...
310
00:19:08,334 --> 00:19:10,644
a good person,
and I appreciate him for that.
311
00:19:10,703 --> 00:19:15,152
You know, that's very refreshing
'cause I deal with a lot of divorced couples.
312
00:19:15,207 --> 00:19:19,212
You wouldn't believe
the hatred and animosity.
313
00:19:19,278 --> 00:19:22,487
I mean, they may as well
have stayed married, you know.
314
00:19:24,250 --> 00:19:26,230
Hi, Bob. Hi, Emily.
Hi, Lois.
315
00:19:26,285 --> 00:19:28,492
Guess what just happened.
Oh, Lois.
316
00:19:28,554 --> 00:19:31,797
- Hello, Howard.
- Hi, Lois. Did you get my message?
317
00:19:31,857 --> 00:19:34,838
That's why I'm here.
How come you're here?
318
00:19:34,894 --> 00:19:36,965
I mean, aren't you supposed
to be somewhere else?
319
00:19:37,029 --> 00:19:38,975
I don't have to fly
to St. Louis after all.
320
00:19:39,031 --> 00:19:42,069
The guy I was supposed to fill in for doesn't
have the Asian flu. He has the regular flu.
321
00:19:42,134 --> 00:19:46,344
- And they let him fly.
- Come on. Sit down, Howard.
322
00:19:46,405 --> 00:19:49,682
- Well, uh--
- Sit down. I'll help Emily with the coffee.
323
00:19:55,114 --> 00:19:57,116
[Sighs]
324
00:19:58,550 --> 00:20:00,996
- Well--
_ 50..
325
00:20:02,187 --> 00:20:05,634
Uh, what's new?
326
00:20:07,192 --> 00:20:09,570
Well, uh, uh,
the deal came through...
327
00:20:09,628 --> 00:20:11,574
on the new house in Evanston.
328
00:20:11,630 --> 00:20:13,906
I'm getting my master's degree
in French.
329
00:20:13,966 --> 00:20:15,968
I'm taking tennis lessons
twice a week.
330
00:20:16,035 --> 00:20:19,847
Oh. And that cute little white sports car
in front of the building, that's mine.
331
00:20:19,905 --> 00:20:22,408
- What's new with you?
- Nothing.
332
00:20:23,409 --> 00:20:25,389
Would you like your coffee now?
333
00:20:25,444 --> 00:20:28,914
- Fine.
- I'll have some coffee too.
334
00:20:28,981 --> 00:20:32,326
Uh, better yet, I'll have the other half
of that scotch and water.
335
00:20:32,384 --> 00:20:34,330
I'll get it.
336
00:20:34,386 --> 00:20:37,265
Uh, where's Howie?
337
00:20:37,323 --> 00:20:39,462
Oh, he's hiding.
338
00:20:39,525 --> 00:20:42,062
You didn't scare him, Bob.
Howie doesn't like to be scared.
339
00:20:42,127 --> 00:20:44,232
No, he's fine.
He's enjoying himself.
340
00:20:44,296 --> 00:20:48,506
Oh, that figures. He always
enjoys himself when I'm not here.
341
00:20:48,567 --> 00:20:50,979
Howard, that's not true.
342
00:20:51,036 --> 00:20:54,745
All he does when he's home is talk about
the great times he has when you're together.
343
00:20:54,807 --> 00:20:58,311
- You don't have to lie to me, Lois.
- I'm not lying, Howard.
344
00:20:58,377 --> 00:21:00,914
I mean, he can't wait
to get away from me.
345
00:21:00,980 --> 00:21:02,926
He likes me about
as much as you do.
346
00:21:02,982 --> 00:21:07,192
Oh, that's ridiculous.
Howie likes you twice as much as I do.
347
00:21:08,721 --> 00:21:11,327
Well, that still isn't very much,
is it, Lois?
348
00:21:11,390 --> 00:21:13,700
Do you-- Do you mind
if I ask a question?
349
00:21:13,759 --> 00:21:16,399
Oh, no, no.
Bob's a psychologist...
350
00:21:16,462 --> 00:21:20,706
and he's had a lot of training in these matters,
and I think we should listen to him.
351
00:21:20,766 --> 00:21:24,373
- Go r/ght ahead Ask anything
- Do you like cream or sugar in your coffee?
352
00:21:26,605 --> 00:21:28,949
Black is fine.
353
00:21:29,008 --> 00:21:31,648
See what I mean?
He's a great psychologist.
354
00:21:31,710 --> 00:21:33,656
He knows when not to get involved.
355
00:21:33,712 --> 00:21:36,249
Howard, I didn't come up here
to argue with you.
356
00:21:36,315 --> 00:21:38,955
Believe me when I tell you
that your son loves and respects you.
357
00:21:39,018 --> 00:21:42,989
- Oh, sure he does.
- Well, he talks about you all the time.
358
00:21:43,055 --> 00:21:46,764
The truth of the matter is, Howard,
that your son looks upon you...
359
00:21:46,825 --> 00:21:49,704
as though you were
kind of a god.
360
00:21:49,762 --> 00:21:53,574
- Really?
- But I straightened him out on that.
361
00:21:55,067 --> 00:21:58,207
- Thanks a lot, Lois.
- Well, you're not, you know.
362
00:21:58,270 --> 00:22:02,980
I know. It's an identity thing
that all sons have with their fathers.
363
00:22:03,042 --> 00:22:05,386
But you wouldn't know about that,
would you, Lois?
364
00:22:05,444 --> 00:22:08,186
I hate to keep butting in--
365
00:22:08,247 --> 00:22:10,284
No. Go ahead.
Tell her, Bob.
366
00:22:10,349 --> 00:22:13,558
We have some great
banana cream pie.
367
00:22:15,087 --> 00:22:17,897
Isn't he smart to stay out of it
like this?
368
00:22:17,956 --> 00:22:20,334
No pie for me. Thanks.
369
00:22:20,392 --> 00:22:23,430
I'll have hers.
370
00:22:23,495 --> 00:22:25,441
Look. Look, Howard.
371
00:22:25,497 --> 00:22:28,034
I know you were a little shortchanged
with Howie this visit...
372
00:22:28,100 --> 00:22:30,307
so how'd you like to keep him
through the weekend?
373
00:22:30,369 --> 00:22:32,542
Really? Are you kidding?
374
00:22:32,604 --> 00:22:36,609
Wow. I'll take him to a basketball game.
He can explain it to me.
375
00:22:36,675 --> 00:22:39,155
Well, it's getting late,
and I have tennis and yoga tomorrow.
376
00:22:39,211 --> 00:22:42,749
And I have Howie tomorrow. I'll walkyou
to your car. I haven't seen it yet.
377
00:22:42,815 --> 00:22:46,592
- How much is it costing me?
- Actually, the payments are quite reasonable.
378
00:22:46,652 --> 00:22:49,098
I got a great trade-in
on your boat and your trailer.
379
00:22:49,154 --> 00:22:52,931
You're not leaving yet, are you?
We barely had a chance to sit and talk.
380
00:22:52,991 --> 00:22:56,495
I really have to go, Emily.
I'm not much of a night person.
381
00:22:56,562 --> 00:22:59,600
Yeah, she's right, you know.
She's not.
382
00:23:02,468 --> 00:23:06,678
She never was. Oh, well,
I guess we better be going.
383
00:23:06,738 --> 00:23:09,446
Listen. We loved
having Howie and all...
384
00:23:09,508 --> 00:23:13,456
but he's not rightfully ours,
so you might wanna take him along.
385
00:23:13,512 --> 00:23:16,493
- I'm sorry. I'll get him. Where is he?
- In the bedroom.
386
00:23:16,548 --> 00:23:19,461
- Excuse me.
- Well, thank you both again.
387
00:23:19,518 --> 00:23:21,520
It was really
a pleasure meeting you.
388
00:23:21,587 --> 00:23:25,057
It's nice to know Howie's in good hands
whichever parent he's with.
389
00:23:25,124 --> 00:23:28,765
- You seem to have a beautiful divorce.
- Well, thank you.
390
00:23:28,827 --> 00:23:31,398
We're trying to make it work.
391
00:23:33,966 --> 00:23:37,345
Bob, did you say Howie is in the bedroom?
Because ifhe is, I can't find him.
392
00:23:37,402 --> 00:23:39,313
- I'm sure he's there.
- But where?
393
00:23:39,371 --> 00:23:42,250
Did you try under
the giggling overcoat?
394
00:23:42,307 --> 00:23:44,844
Is that why
it was giggling? Oh.
395
00:23:55,053 --> 00:23:58,500
Nineteen.
396
00:23:58,557 --> 00:24:00,503
Twenty.
397
00:24:00,559 --> 00:24:02,505
There.
398
00:24:04,496 --> 00:24:08,911
Bob, I'm not saying anything
to you that you wouldn't say to me...
399
00:24:08,967 --> 00:24:11,709
but you ate an awful lot
of banana cream pie tonight.
400
00:24:11,770 --> 00:24:13,943
You're right.
401
00:24:19,011 --> 00:24:21,013
One.
402
00:24:22,481 --> 00:24:24,620
There.
403
00:24:28,287 --> 00:24:33,236
- Emily, is this scale right? - You may have
to adjust it. Howie was playing with it.
404
00:24:33,292 --> 00:24:37,763
For a minute there, I thought I ate
45 pounds of banana cream pie.
405
00:24:39,264 --> 00:24:41,608
It sure was nice having a little one
around today, wasn't it?
406
00:24:41,667 --> 00:24:44,273
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
407
00:24:49,374 --> 00:24:52,321
' Emily?
_ Hmm?
408
00:24:52,377 --> 00:24:54,584
I think we've got a problem.
409
00:24:56,615 --> 00:24:59,061
What problem?
410
00:24:59,117 --> 00:25:01,222
Does this belong to you?
411
00:25:36,722 --> 00:25:38,224
[ Mews]
35645
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.