All language subtitles for Bewitched.S03E27.The.Crone.of.Cawdor.Imprint.1080p.BluRay.FLAC2.0.H.264-BTN_track5_[eng]

[Sam] Well, I'm meeting
Darrin for lunch about 1:00,

so if you got here about noon,
it'd be perfect.

Okay? Bye-bye.

Who was that, honey?
The sitter? Mmm-hmm.

Who'd you get?
My mother.

Since when do you talk to your mother
on the phone? I wasn't on the phone.

Oh. Honey,
about lunch.

I've been wondering, is it
wise to go to La Bella Donna?

The service is awfully slow.
Oh, sweetheart.

The whole point is that's where we had
lunch on our first date three years ago,

if the service had been any faster,
we might never have gotten married.

That's true.

Unless, of course,
you haven't got the time.

Well, I do have
a very heavy afternoon.

But I've only got one appointment this
morning: the Warbell Dress account.

Warbell? I thought you said he
was one of your toughest clients.

He is, but I'm meeting
with his daughter, Terry.

She's been made advertising
manager of the firm.

Look, just call me
if you have a problem.

It's wonderful you remembered. Most men don't
even remember their wedding anniversary.

They would if they were
married to you. Mmm!

Because you...
are unforgettable.

What did I ever do
to deserve you?

That's what I've been asking
ever since you married.

Endora, this day is so special that
not even you are going to spoil it.

Good-bye, sweetheart.
Good-bye, darling.

Good-bye,
Endora, dear.

I may be violently ill.

Mother?
Hmm.

You know very well you catch more
flies with honey than with vinegar.

Tell that to the Dodger
outfield.

Hi! Aren't you
Darrin Stephens?

Yes, I am.
I don't believe--

No, we haven't met. But we're
supposed to in about 20 minutes.

I'm Terry Warbell.
Oh, how do you do?

Isn't this a coincidence?
It certainly is.

I thought your folks
lived in Larchmont.

They do, but since I'm going to
be working with McMann and Tate,

I got an apartment
not far from here.

Well, how about that? I better
hurry. I'll be late for our meeting.

I have an idea. Why don't you ride
down with me, we can talk on the way.

Well, that's very sweet of you, but
I'll be needing my car later on.

That's an even better idea.
I'll go along with you.

But, uh...

You see, the sooner
we get started,

the earlier we'll finish.
Okay.

There, that's a human being
for you.

One minute he's so sweet you
have to go on a sugar-free diet.

And then he goes out and picks up
the first gorgeous face he sees.

Mother, he was just
giving her a lift.

From what I can see,
vice versa.

Any woman whose husband
remembers the date

of their first meeting
has nothing to worry about.

I'm glad you feel that way,
darling.

I do.
Good.

Do you really think
she was that gorgeous?

Oh, comme ci, comme ca.

And although I understand Warbell's interest
in a class magazine like Knickerbocker's,

my study shows that,
on a cost-per-thousand basis,

we could do much better in some
of the mass-circulation magazines.

How do you feel?
Just wonderful.

I, I mean about the
mass-circulation magazines.

The what?

Miss Warbell--

Terry.

Uh, Terry. I, uh--

I think you have something
on your mind.

I do. I was wondering
where we were going for lunch.

Lunch. Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm afraid that's impossible. I
have a very important lunch date.

Oh, and you can't break it?
Even for me?

I just couldn't.

Well, Darrin, how are you
getting along with the loveliest

advertising manager
ever to grace these offices?

Fine, fine.
Everything okay?

I think he's absolutely marvelous,
even if he won't take me to lunch.

Well, most of our clients feel that
Darrin-- Won't take you to lunch?

It's just that I have a very
important engagement I can't break.

Darrin, you must be sick, or you wouldn't even
dream of turning down this lovely young lady.

Even if she weren't the daughter of
one of our oldest and biggest accounts.

Sorry, it, it's just
one of those things.

See you a minute, old man?

Uh, certainly.
Excuse me.

Be right back.

What do you mean, you can't break
your lunch date? Who's it with?

Samantha.
Your wife?

You're putting me on.

Larry, it's
a very important lunch.

What's so important
about lunch with your wife?

Well, it's the anniversary
of our first meeting.

Big deal!
Bring her a box of candy!

Larry, I promised.

So what? Now, take it from
an older and wiser hand.

It won't be the last promise
you break.

You read me?

Larry-- Darrin, my
boy, remember this.

At McMann and Tate,
no sacrifice is too great.

You lucky son of a gun.

Now, get on the horn
and tell Sam the lunch is off.

Larry, we've been through this before.
There's no sense threatening me.

Oh. Well, let's
put it this way.

You take Miss Warbell to lunch,
or you're fired.

Now I read you.

How do I look?

Too good for him.
Oh, Mother.

Now, in just a little while,
Darrin and I will be reliving

one of the most romantic
moments of our lives.

Now, can't you try to be a
little happy for us? All right.

But it's very difficult to change
the habit of a lifetime, dear.

Excuse me.

Hello. Oh, hi, sweetheart.

Uh, Samantha, something's come up. I'm
afraid I won't be able to make lunch.

Oh, sweetheart.
Business, huh? What else?

Oh, I don't know. I thought maybe Miss
Warbell had swept you off your feet.

Is that who you're
having lunch with?

Uh, that's right. Exactly. We
haven't finished our business, see.

I see. Is she as pretty as that girl I saw
getting in the car with you this morning?

They're, uh, practically
identical, if you know what I mean.

You mean
that's Miss Warbell?

That's right.

How'd she know
where you live?

I'll explain that to you
tonight... if I can.

Well, all right,
sweetheart. Bye-bye.

Well, what's the story?

Darrin's taking a client
to lunch.

You mean it's that girl he
drove off with this morning?

Oh, Mother, it's business,
pure and simple.

Don't talk to me about
being pure. I saw that girl,

and I'd like to know what
kind of business. Really!

You're my daughter, and if that
mortal means so much to you--

And I can't imagine why--

But if he does,
you've got to do something.

Like what? Well, if I were
you, I'd pop in to that office,

and I'd find out
what was going on.

Well, you're not me.

Now, you handle things your way,
and I'll handle things mine.

That's a good idea.

Oh, Mother!
That's not what I meant!

We should be back about 2:00, Betty.
Where would you like to have lunch?

Anywhere you say. You still have
a reservation at La Bella Donna,

if you'd like
to eat there.

Well, uh, the service there
is awfully slow.

Sounds perfect.
That's where I'd like to go.

Well, Betty, then we'll be back in
an hour and a half, or two hours.

Yes, Mr. Stephens.
Oh, Miss Warbell,

I'm dying to ask you
a question. What is it?

Do you think boots
will be popular next year?

I'd say that all depends on how
boots behaves herself this year.

Well, shall we go?
I'm starved. Yes.

Oh! I don't want to leave
without my notes.

I hate to rush you through lunch, but
I have a lot of notes to go through...

Oh, uh, excuse me a minute.

Oh, there you are,
Miss Warbell.

I'm Miss Krovistrod. I write the
fashion copy for Tate and McMann.

I've seen your picture
a million times.

Now, I just want to get
a little advance

on what you're planning
for next season.

Uh, are we through with those long
skirts the girls have been wearing?

I do hope so. They're so
dreary, don't you agree?

Why, yes.
Yes, I do.

Then we can look forward to
hemlines being raised next season.

Oh, definitely. I think
if a girl has something,

she should show it.

Now, I would like your opinion

about the new
polyester fabrics.

Or don't you care for
her designs?

Oh, uh, I think Polly Esther is
as good as the next designer.

Oh, I'm glad you feel
that way. Thanks much!

This time I'm gonna keep these
in my hand.

Abner! Aren't ya
ever gonna get up?

What for?
I wanna talk to you.

Talk. Well, how can you
listen when you're asleep?

Same way I listen
when I'm awake.

Yes. Yes!
I don't know.

I, I beg your pardon?

I seem to...
I don't know.

I think I'm lost.

Oh, well, don't let it bother
you. People your age often forget.

But I'm only 24.

What!
Abner! Wake up.

Wake up! Abner, there's an old hag at
the door, and she says she's only 24!

I told you sooner or later
your mother would flip.

Can you imagine a fashion
expert not knowing anything

about miniskirts or boots
or synthetic fabrics?

Well, she was probably
being funny. Don't you think?

No, phony. I tell you,
that woman's a fake.

Mother, that's ridiculous.

I can't understand you,
Samantha.

Your husband is in the clutches of
who knows what kind of impostor.

And you refuse to become
alarmed. That's right.

Because Darrin would never do anything
to hurt me. He's good and kind.

Then how is it that he took that
woman to your favorite restaurant?

You're making that up.

I tell you, I heard him say
he'd be at La Bella Donna.

Now, do you call that
good and kind?

Yes. Good for nothing,
and kind of a rat!

Hello. Oh.
Hello, Mrs. Kravitz.

I have a visitor here, and I
have a feeling that she's, uh,

your kind of people.

What do you mean by that?

Yes.

Yes?

Yes. Well, uh,
hold on just a moment.

Mother!
Yes, darling?

Are you expecting anyone?
No. Why?

It's Mrs. Kravitz. There's
a woman at her house,

apparently a very, very old woman,
who claims she's only 24-years-old.

Some women never
give up hope.

What's her name?
What's her name?

Do you know your name?

Of course.
Terry Warbell.

Terry Warbell!

I knew it. I knew there was
something wrong with that woman.

What is it, Mother? What's
going on? I'll explain later.

Right now you'd better pop in next
door, get that woman over here,

before Mrs. Loudmouth...
finds out anything more.

Hello, are you there,
Mrs. Stephens?

No, I'm here.

I-- I--

How could you?
I--

Abner! Abner!
This you gotta see.

I was talking to her on the
telephone, and she pops in here!

Who?
Who else? Mrs. Stephens.

Look!

You'll say anything
to get me up, won't you?

Now, just calm yourself and
try to recall what happened.

It was this morning. I was
driving along in my car.

I saw this old woman. She
waved at me, and I stopped.

And then, I don't know how it
happened, but I was the old woman,

and she was driving off
in my car!

The only thing I can remember
is my age and my name.

Oh, there's no doubt
about it.

There's no doubt about it.
She's the Crone of Cawdor.

The Crone of Cawdor?
Yes.

That does sound familiar.
Well, it should.

When you were a little girl, it was
one of your favorite bedtime stories.

Of course! She was
turned into a hag,

and had to live all alone on
a mountain peak in Carpathia.

That's right. And do you
remember the rest of it?

Well, let's see.

"When the earth turns once
around the sun,

"let the crone go forth
till the day is done.

"Another's form she'll take
and her form leave,

"from 6:00 in the morn...

"Till 6:00 in the eve.

"And in this guise, if she
can secure a willing kiss

"from a mortal pure,

"to her will pass
the mortal's youth,

"to him will pass her age,
forsooth."

Oh, no! Darrin!

Oh, yes! And if he kisses her,
he'll be 500 years older.

But no wiser.

What's the matter, darling?

I thought you trusted
your husband implicitly.

Well, of course I trust him. But
not with a 500-year-old crone.

Especially not with
a 500-year-old crone

who's gorgeous and
wants to be kissed.

Hello, Larry?

Do you happen to know where
Darrin is? I'm trying to find him.

Why, he, he's with one of our clients,
and I believe he said he was going to...

their apartment
to finish their meeting.

You mean he isn't
with Miss Warbell anymore?

Oh, he told you
about her?

Larry, whose apartment
has he gone to?

Sam, you have nothing to worry
about. Darrin is as steady as a rock.

Miss Warbell just wants to show him
some of her advertising budgets.

Will you please just give me
her address?

Sam, I know
you won't believe this.

But it's the honest truth. He
hung up before I could get it.

Hello?
Sam, are you all right?

Oh, yes.
Yes, Larry, I'm fine.

Oh, Mother, what am I
going to do?

If I don't get to Darrin in
time, he'll be 500-years-old.

Well, you know they say there are certain
advantages to being married to an older man.

Stop being frightful
and think of something.

Oh, calm down,
Samantha.

Right now we have to find out where
this reptile in women's clothes lives...

And hope to get there in time
to keep Durwood "kiss less."

Wouldn't you be
more comfortable here?

Well, I think I can
concentrate better standing up.

But I can concentrate better
if you're sitting down.

Okay.

Well-- Can't we stop talking
business for a moment?

Well, I would like to go
over these details.

But we've been
meeting all day,

and you haven't told me
a thing about yourself.

If we're going to be working together,
there are things I'd like to know.

Now, tell me about
yourself.

Well, uh, uh, what
would you like to know?

What do you do for fun?

Oh, uh, sports. Swimming,
fishing, mountain climbing.

Mountain climbing!

That's very good.

You have
the most fascinating eyes.

Well, uh, I was born with
a slight cast in the left eye.

Isn't there something
you'd like to do?

Yes! I'd like to finish
going over these notes.

"And there is a possibility that
the Warbell Dress Company

"may be interested
in some tax loss purchases,

"and toward that end,
I would appreciate...

"your giving us complete details
on sale price of your holdings...

"As well as a--"

What-- What happened
to Miss Kornblut?

It was time for her
coffee break, Mr. Warbell.

And she couldn't wait
to finish a letter?

I tell ya, nothing's the same
since the union came in.

While we're stopped, sir, could
you please give me Terry's address?

I seem to have misplaced it.

Uh, 35 Rollins Place.
Now, can we go on? Yes, sir.

"As well as a certified copy
of all of your company's debts,

"Including those owed to the
government for corporation taxes."

Ya got that?
Got what?

Why don't you people drink coffee
for a living and take work breaks?

Now, here's our big gun.

Warbell is an odd name. You
almost want to say "warbler."

Well, why not take advantage
of it?

Now, what we had in mind
was a new dress.

We could call it
the Warbell Warbler.

When we introduce the dress, all the
department stores will take out full page ads.

We'll pick up half
of the charges, of course--

A simple "I don't care for the
idea" would have been enough.

What sort of mortal man
are you anyway?

Is business the only thing
on your mind?

Doesn't it matter to you that
you're alone with a beautiful woman?

With a warm, vibrant woman
crying out for a little love?

Kiss me.
Uh, uh, Terry--

It's nothing against
you personally.

It's just that I'm
a very happily married man--

I'm not asking you to run away with
me, I'm just asking you to kiss me.

Yeah, but-- Just
one little kiss, please.

One can't do any harm.

Oh, are you wrong!

[Darrin] Sam, what
are you doing here?

Darrin, you better
come with me. I will not!

I don't know how you found me, but this is
the most insulting thing I ever heard of!

Talk about lack of trust!
I trust you.

It's that-- That woman
I don't trust.

I beg your pardon.

Sam, I think you owe
Miss Warbell an apology.

That woman is not
Miss Warbell.

Then who is she?

The what of what?
The Crone of Cawdor.

That's the most ridiculous
story I've ever heard.

Only an insanely jealous woman
would make up something like that.

Sam, if this is your idea
of a joke, it's a bad one!

It's true, if you kiss her,
you'll be 500-years-old.

Ooh, Sam you come up
with some real beauts!

Tell him. Go ahead. Tell
him what I'm saying is true.

I'll do nothing of the
kind.

Pretend she's not here!
It'll teach her a lesson.

It might at that. I think I will
kiss you.

Any wife who spies on her husband
deserves not to be disappointed.

What do you think of that?

Be my guest.

Oh, what happened?

It's 6:00 in the eve.

What happened? The clock struck 6:00
just as I was about to strike one.

Will you tell me what
happened? Over here.

Sweetheart--

I'm sick and tired of having you say
I make things up about the Stephens.

So you're gonna take a look at the old hag,
and you're gonna ask her how old she is,

and when she says she's
only 24,

we'll see who's
making things up.

Oh, hi.
Hello.

Hello, Mrs. Stephens. Excuse me, I
just want to prove something to him.

Take a look.

Now ask her
how old she is.

How old are ya?
Twenty-four.

Well, what have you got
to say now?

Let's go home.

Is that all
you've got to say?

When we get home,
I will tell you a lot more.

Good night.

It's lucky that the neighbors
found you and brought you here.

It must be a simple case
of amnesia, don't you think?

I-- I guess so.

I'm terribly sorry
about missing our appointment.

That's perfectly all right. After a good
night's rest, I'm sure you'll be fine.

And can we meet
tomorrow instead? Of course.

Good, because I'm dying
to hear your ideas.

My father says you're
a very bright young man.

Thank you. I don't know about bright,
but my wife helps me stay young.

He means our marriage
keeps him young.

Then I'll see you tomorrow
about 10:00?

Okay. Why don't I
walk you out to the car?

Good night, Miss Warbell.
Good night, Mrs. Stephens.

Excuse me, honey.

Do you want a word
of advice, Samantha?

Not really.

Well, I'm going to give it
to you anyway.

That girl is not
to be trusted.

You don't mean to say
that she's an impostor?

No, she's the real thing.

Oh, is she real. That's
why I wouldn't trust her.

Now, if I were you, tomorrow
morning, I'd make some excuse

to pop in to that office,
and I'd just make sure that...

Mmm.

Honey,
you are the greatest.

Any other wife would've flipped
over the treatment you got today.

Oh? Well, for future reference,
I wasn't too far from flipping.

Oh, you pitched right in
and rustled up this dinner.

And you know something, this lasagne is
every bit as good as La Bella Donna's.

Well, it should be. I had it
sent from La Bella Donna.

More chianti?
Mmm-hmm.

Courtesy of
La Bella Donna?

Everything here
is from La Bella Donna.

Oh. Except this.

Happy anniversary,
darling, of our first meeting.

I'll kiss to that.