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1
00:00:18,844 --> 00:00:20,107
Previously on Call Me Fitz.
2
00:00:20,107 --> 00:00:22,326
I think with time,
you and your new cousin
3
00:00:22,326 --> 00:00:24,198
could become
quite close.
4
00:00:24,198 --> 00:00:26,069
Sounds like your
father is embracing the
5
00:00:26,069 --> 00:00:28,550
idea of bringing the
family together again.
6
00:00:28,550 --> 00:00:29,768
You should too.
7
00:00:29,768 --> 00:00:30,900
Embrace Richard?
8
00:00:30,900 --> 00:00:32,902
Get to know him.
9
00:00:32,902 --> 00:00:34,121
Oh ya.
10
00:00:34,121 --> 00:00:35,209
It's like
we're one.
11
00:00:35,209 --> 00:00:38,125
Ya, it's like I'm
fucking myself.
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00:00:38,125 --> 00:00:41,432
I think it's time we
told everyone the truth.
13
00:00:41,432 --> 00:00:43,347
I am your
real father.
14
00:00:43,347 --> 00:00:44,914
Paula is...
15
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:45,958
My sister.
16
00:00:47,917 --> 00:00:49,484
Face it, the
dealership's done.
17
00:00:49,484 --> 00:00:51,790
Everything this family
touches breaks.
18
00:00:51,790 --> 00:00:54,184
There's nothing good
about the Fitzpatricks.
19
00:00:54,184 --> 00:00:55,403
Fuck.
20
00:00:55,403 --> 00:00:57,187
You're nothing without
Fitzpatrick Motors.
21
00:00:57,187 --> 00:00:59,276
We're nothing without
Fitzpatrick Motors.
22
00:00:59,276 --> 00:01:01,061
This family wouldn't
exsist without
23
00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:03,759
Fitzpatrick
fucking Motors.
24
00:01:03,759 --> 00:01:05,761
Our father would like
to offer you a job.
25
00:01:05,761 --> 00:01:08,372
It would give us a
chance to work together
26
00:01:08,372 --> 00:01:09,721
as brother
and sister.
27
00:01:09,721 --> 00:01:11,854
Get off my property.
28
00:01:11,854 --> 00:01:13,377
Maggie Murphy.
29
00:01:14,813 --> 00:01:16,119
Let's run away
together Maggie.
30
00:01:17,947 --> 00:01:19,731
Start over.
31
00:01:19,731 --> 00:01:20,776
Fuck my family.
32
00:01:20,776 --> 00:01:22,734
But first you.
33
00:01:22,734 --> 00:01:24,084
You didn't leave
me for Elaine.
34
00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:26,825
You left me
for your family.
35
00:01:26,825 --> 00:01:28,740
For your son.
36
00:01:28,740 --> 00:01:30,960
Hey Childs,
it's Fitz.
37
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,005
Listen about
that job offer.
38
00:01:33,005 --> 00:01:35,007
We should talk.
39
00:01:38,272 --> 00:01:42,537
In the pre-owned auto industry,
we tin slingers have a saying:
40
00:01:42,537 --> 00:01:45,192
When life hands
you a lemon.
41
00:01:45,192 --> 00:01:48,847
You give that baby a fresh coat
of paint and dump it on
42
00:01:48,847 --> 00:01:50,153
the nearest sucker.
43
00:01:50,153 --> 00:01:52,416
Thanks so much
Mr. Fitzpatrick!
44
00:01:55,898 --> 00:01:58,509
Same rule applies
to people.
45
00:01:58,509 --> 00:02:00,642
Put on the right
coat of paint.
46
00:02:00,642 --> 00:02:03,035
Find yourself the
nearest sucker
47
00:02:03,035 --> 00:02:04,733
I'm Pat Childs.
48
00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:06,343
And you're good to go.
49
00:02:06,343 --> 00:02:08,519
Trust Fitzy on this one:
50
00:02:08,519 --> 00:02:12,523
It's not what's inside,
but what's outside that counts.
51
00:02:12,523 --> 00:02:14,917
Now remember Richard,
don't be nervous.
52
00:02:14,917 --> 00:02:16,832
This is going to be
just as awkward
53
00:02:16,832 --> 00:02:17,833
for your father.
54
00:02:17,833 --> 00:02:18,964
He's not my father, dipshit.
55
00:02:18,964 --> 00:02:20,923
Just 'cause he
donated some ball
56
00:02:20,923 --> 00:02:22,751
paste doesn't make
him my old man.
57
00:02:22,751 --> 00:02:24,231
But he did offer
you a job,
58
00:02:24,231 --> 00:02:25,710
and youhave accepted.
59
00:02:25,710 --> 00:02:29,018
Let's see what's on the
table for Fitzy first.
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00:02:34,893 --> 00:02:36,765
Just walking through
that door is a
61
00:02:36,765 --> 00:02:38,070
step in the right direction.
62
00:02:38,070 --> 00:02:40,551
Oh Richard, my heart is
beating so quickly.
63
00:02:40,551 --> 00:02:41,857
You're going to fit
right in!
64
00:02:41,857 --> 00:02:45,556
Oh, sorry sir.
65
00:02:45,556 --> 00:02:48,646
Argh! My eye!
66
00:02:48,646 --> 00:02:49,952
Eventually.
67
00:02:59,788 --> 00:03:06,055
♪ Without you
I'd find my smile ♪
68
00:03:06,055 --> 00:03:10,973
♪ Without you
I'd'a won by a mile ♪
69
00:03:10,973 --> 00:03:16,805
♪ Without you
Oh life would be so grand ♪
70
00:03:16,805 --> 00:03:22,245
♪ Without you
I'm half a man ♪
71
00:03:22,245 --> 00:03:25,205
♪ With out you
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00:03:27,816 --> 00:03:33,648
♪ Without youuu
73
00:03:33,648 --> 00:03:36,390
♪ Without you.
74
00:03:38,827 --> 00:03:40,568
This is exciting,
I'm getting tingles.
75
00:03:40,568 --> 00:03:41,873
Brother and sister.
76
00:03:41,873 --> 00:03:44,833
Father and son--
Mr. Fitzpatrick, Richard.
77
00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:46,182
No, Rick.
78
00:03:46,182 --> 00:03:47,662
Let's stick
with Fitz.
79
00:03:47,662 --> 00:03:48,837
The family united.
80
00:03:48,837 --> 00:03:50,273
The circle of life.
81
00:03:50,273 --> 00:03:53,145
Circle. O.
82
00:03:53,145 --> 00:03:54,799
It's kismet, Ricky.
83
00:03:54,799 --> 00:03:56,105
Fitz.
84
00:03:56,105 --> 00:03:57,802
I want you and your sister
to work as a pair.
85
00:03:57,802 --> 00:03:59,413
I want a fluid exchange.
86
00:03:59,413 --> 00:04:01,719
Get inside
each other.
87
00:04:01,719 --> 00:04:03,068
Way ahead of
you pops.
88
00:04:03,068 --> 00:04:05,288
You see Ricky,
we're taking the
89
00:04:05,288 --> 00:04:07,899
"car" out of
car bon emission,
90
00:04:07,899 --> 00:04:09,771
which leaves us
with "bon",
91
00:04:09,771 --> 00:04:10,989
or French
for "good".
92
00:04:10,989 --> 00:04:13,557
Now I want you two
to deliver that good
93
00:04:13,557 --> 00:04:15,690
to our next O-Mobile
focus group.
94
00:04:15,690 --> 00:04:18,388
Together, great.
95
00:04:18,388 --> 00:04:22,871
Oh, and here's a l
ittle light reading.
96
00:04:24,873 --> 00:04:26,178
Welcome aboard, son.
97
00:04:26,178 --> 00:04:31,227
You start tomorrow,
nine sharp.
98
00:04:31,227 --> 00:04:32,837
A. M.?
99
00:04:36,624 --> 00:04:38,190
Our accountant has
given us one week
100
00:04:38,190 --> 00:04:39,757
to turn our finances
around or the
101
00:04:39,757 --> 00:04:41,585
consequences
will be dire.
102
00:04:41,585 --> 00:04:42,673
The Lady?
103
00:04:42,673 --> 00:04:43,892
What does she know?
104
00:04:43,892 --> 00:04:44,849
She does not
have a penis
105
00:04:44,849 --> 00:04:47,025
with which
to think, hmmm.
106
00:04:47,025 --> 00:04:50,333
Hey! Who do I have
to blow to around
107
00:04:50,333 --> 00:04:52,814
here to get
another drink?
108
00:04:52,814 --> 00:04:53,728
It is his fault.
109
00:04:53,728 --> 00:04:54,685
The Aged One
has not paid us
110
00:04:54,685 --> 00:04:58,863
one single rupee.
111
00:05:04,913 --> 00:05:07,350
Wha? I wan' a
bottle, a glass,
112
00:05:07,350 --> 00:05:08,873
and you two
to fuck off.
113
00:05:08,873 --> 00:05:09,961
Your tab, first.
114
00:05:09,961 --> 00:05:11,267
All four thousand,
two hundred and
115
00:05:11,267 --> 00:05:14,009
thirty dollars and
eighty four cents, now.
116
00:05:14,009 --> 00:05:15,271
Okay, please.
117
00:05:15,271 --> 00:05:16,272
What's the point?
118
00:05:16,272 --> 00:05:17,752
You two cactus
crammers will only
119
00:05:17,752 --> 00:05:19,667
lose it in
this dump.
120
00:05:19,667 --> 00:05:21,582
You got no beer
nuts, your menu's
121
00:05:21,582 --> 00:05:24,498
garbage and look at
these pussy drinks.
122
00:05:24,498 --> 00:05:26,761
Pink Lady?
123
00:05:26,761 --> 00:05:29,067
Appletini?
124
00:05:29,067 --> 00:05:30,852
Gin?
125
00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:32,157
We are attempting
to increase our
126
00:05:32,157 --> 00:05:33,681
factor of hipness.
127
00:05:33,681 --> 00:05:35,204
Fuck hipness.
128
00:05:35,204 --> 00:05:36,205
You want to make
some real money?
129
00:05:36,205 --> 00:05:37,554
Get some real
men in here.
130
00:05:37,554 --> 00:05:40,688
Cousin, the wrinkled
man's breath may be
131
00:05:40,688 --> 00:05:45,693
foul but his
words are sweet.
132
00:05:45,693 --> 00:05:47,564
So? Where does one find
these "real men"
133
00:05:47,564 --> 00:05:49,740
of which you speak?
134
00:05:51,742 --> 00:05:53,396
Tell you what
I'm gonna do.
135
00:05:53,396 --> 00:05:54,832
I'll get you two
clowns back into
136
00:05:54,832 --> 00:05:57,792
black if you tear
up my bar tab,
137
00:05:57,792 --> 00:05:59,402
and let me
drink for free.
138
00:06:04,929 --> 00:06:08,193
So, when we last met
you were having
139
00:06:08,193 --> 00:06:09,804
conflicted sexual feelings
140
00:06:09,804 --> 00:06:11,109
about your cousin.
141
00:06:11,109 --> 00:06:12,197
How's that going?
142
00:06:12,197 --> 00:06:14,939
Well, I tried your
coping mechanisms--
143
00:06:14,939 --> 00:06:17,333
Oh good, nice.
144
00:06:17,333 --> 00:06:20,641
- And we slept together.
145
00:06:20,641 --> 00:06:22,599
Well good news is
first cousins are
146
00:06:22,599 --> 00:06:24,819
legally allowed
to marry.
147
00:06:24,819 --> 00:06:26,211
He's not my cousin.
148
00:06:26,211 --> 00:06:29,693
Thank god, because that
would be, you know.
149
00:06:29,693 --> 00:06:31,434
He's my brother.
150
00:06:35,525 --> 00:06:36,700
Listen, toots.
151
00:06:36,700 --> 00:06:38,354
You need to
reprogram your
152
00:06:38,354 --> 00:06:39,573
intimacy response.
153
00:06:39,573 --> 00:06:41,357
Next time these
feelings come on,
154
00:06:41,357 --> 00:06:43,664
try to think of
something unpleasant.
155
00:06:43,664 --> 00:06:44,969
Do you have
any phobias?
156
00:06:44,969 --> 00:06:46,797
I do have a strong
157
00:06:46,797 --> 00:06:49,409
aversion to meat and
meat by-products.
158
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:50,932
My father and
I are vegans.
159
00:06:50,932 --> 00:06:54,109
Well we'll tackle your
father another time.
160
00:06:54,109 --> 00:06:56,677
Actually, don't
tackle your father.
161
00:06:56,677 --> 00:06:58,940
In fact,
all physical contact
162
00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:04,380
with relatives is,
you know, out.
163
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,301
Larry, gimme two
ham on whites.
164
00:07:12,301 --> 00:07:14,085
Ooh, and some of
that zing sauce.
165
00:07:14,085 --> 00:07:15,173
This is so exciting;
166
00:07:15,173 --> 00:07:16,653
Richard's first day
on the job,
167
00:07:16,653 --> 00:07:17,654
Josh's work placement.
168
00:07:17,654 --> 00:07:18,916
The entire
Fitzpatrick clan
169
00:07:18,916 --> 00:07:20,657
is finally finding their
life's purpose.
170
00:07:20,657 --> 00:07:22,180
Don't forget about
me, lunch lady.
171
00:07:22,180 --> 00:07:23,747
I get a break from
this stupid ankle
172
00:07:23,747 --> 00:07:25,096
thingy to look
for a job.
173
00:07:25,096 --> 00:07:26,794
Then you too shall
be the beneficiary
174
00:07:26,794 --> 00:07:28,273
of a nutritious lunch.
175
00:07:28,273 --> 00:07:29,405
Weeee!
176
00:07:29,405 --> 00:07:30,754
I got all three food
groups represented
177
00:07:30,754 --> 00:07:32,277
right here,
ass mallet.
178
00:07:32,277 --> 00:07:33,975
Actually, there are
four food groups and
179
00:07:33,975 --> 00:07:35,716
not one of them
involve alcohol.
180
00:07:35,716 --> 00:07:37,761
In fact, drinking is
frowned upon in the
181
00:07:37,761 --> 00:07:38,762
corporate
establishment.
182
00:07:38,762 --> 00:07:39,937
That's fucking retarded.
183
00:07:39,937 --> 00:07:41,722
Nor can you say
words like F-ing,
184
00:07:41,722 --> 00:07:44,681
S-ing, or anything
in the 'tard family.
185
00:07:44,681 --> 00:07:46,161
I think I know how
to handle a bunch of
186
00:07:46,161 --> 00:07:47,423
mooks in slacks.
187
00:07:47,423 --> 00:07:48,903
No, they play by
their own rulebook.
188
00:07:48,903 --> 00:07:51,209
This is not
Fitzpatrick Motors.
189
00:07:51,209 --> 00:07:53,864
Maybe not,
but it will be.
190
00:07:56,519 --> 00:07:57,477
Welcome.
191
00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:58,521
So, where's my
corner office?
192
00:07:58,521 --> 00:08:01,655
Ah! You'll notice
we have no rooms
193
00:08:01,655 --> 00:08:04,005
here at O-mo;
we're all family.
194
00:08:04,005 --> 00:08:05,006
Mr. C.,
195
00:08:05,006 --> 00:08:06,007
still riding
the nectar?
196
00:08:06,007 --> 00:08:07,182
I sure am, friend.
197
00:08:07,182 --> 00:08:08,183
Alright.
198
00:08:08,183 --> 00:08:09,358
I have no idea
who that was.
199
00:08:09,358 --> 00:08:11,447
So I just sit in a
brown beanbag in
200
00:08:11,447 --> 00:08:12,709
the middle of the
fucking room?
201
00:08:12,709 --> 00:08:13,884
No, I do.
202
00:08:13,884 --> 00:08:15,886
The ball and
mat are yours.
203
00:08:15,886 --> 00:08:16,974
For what?
204
00:08:16,974 --> 00:08:19,803
To change the
world, Ricky.
205
00:08:19,803 --> 00:08:22,110
It's Fitz.
206
00:08:22,110 --> 00:08:24,416
Shall we?
207
00:08:28,682 --> 00:08:30,335
And this is
our test room.
208
00:08:30,335 --> 00:08:31,772
Each month,
we introduce a new
209
00:08:31,772 --> 00:08:33,730
component of the O-Mo
to a select audience,
210
00:08:33,730 --> 00:08:36,559
with hopes of growing
a viral campaign.
211
00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:38,082
This month we're
previewing the
212
00:08:38,082 --> 00:08:39,780
Ergonomic Posture Cockpit,
213
00:08:39,780 --> 00:08:40,781
which comes fully
integrated with
214
00:08:40,781 --> 00:08:42,652
social networking capability.
215
00:08:42,652 --> 00:08:44,219
For a little
downtown action
216
00:08:44,219 --> 00:08:45,568
I hear you.
217
00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:51,356
Your somewhere
you fear.
218
00:08:51,356 --> 00:08:52,662
A butcher shop,
219
00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:54,751
surrounded by ribs, and
ground beef, and tripe -
220
00:08:54,751 --> 00:08:57,188
What the fuck
are you doing?
221
00:08:57,188 --> 00:08:59,756
Sausages.
222
00:08:59,756 --> 00:09:02,629
Huge uncircumcised sausages.
223
00:09:02,629 --> 00:09:04,544
Hold on there, sister.
224
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,589
That sibling action
was a one shot deal.
225
00:09:06,589 --> 00:09:09,070
Well okay,
three shots.
226
00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:12,160
Who am I kidding.
227
00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:13,248
Let's do it.
228
00:09:13,248 --> 00:09:14,466
Woah, Woah, Woah;
I think we need to
229
00:09:14,466 --> 00:09:15,859
lay some
ground rules.
230
00:09:15,859 --> 00:09:17,731
Cousin is one thing,
but banging my own
231
00:09:17,731 --> 00:09:22,692
sister-- that hurts
the Fitzy brand.
232
00:09:27,479 --> 00:09:29,569
Our new manly look
is sure to attract
233
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:31,440
clientele of the
burliest nature.
234
00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:32,963
Finished our new
drink menu.
235
00:09:32,963 --> 00:09:33,964
Bourbon.
236
00:09:33,964 --> 00:09:34,965
Exactly.
237
00:09:34,965 --> 00:09:36,184
What else have
you got?
238
00:09:36,184 --> 00:09:38,621
Oh, the bounty was
rich, Aged One, come.
239
00:09:38,621 --> 00:09:42,669
Giant rusty anchors
from the days of yore.
240
00:09:42,669 --> 00:09:45,106
Eye patch,
241
00:09:45,106 --> 00:09:47,064
chains,
242
00:09:47,064 --> 00:09:49,371
leather bullfighter vests.
243
00:09:49,371 --> 00:09:54,811
And this saber,
sheathed in an
244
00:09:54,811 --> 00:09:57,074
authentic Mongolian
yak scabbard.
245
00:09:57,074 --> 00:09:58,598
And let us not
forget our
246
00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:00,512
piece de resistance,
247
00:10:00,512 --> 00:10:05,169
our manliest
find yet.
248
00:10:05,169 --> 00:10:07,650
The Great Grizzly of
the high north.
249
00:10:07,650 --> 00:10:10,653
The most feared
animal of all.
250
00:10:10,653 --> 00:10:11,654
How's does this fit
in with the
251
00:10:11,654 --> 00:10:12,481
nautical theme?
252
00:10:32,196 --> 00:10:33,197
Wait!
253
00:10:40,596 --> 00:10:44,948
And the legend of
the Sea Bear begins.
254
00:10:48,386 --> 00:10:49,692
Well Lookie lookie
lookie here,
255
00:10:49,692 --> 00:10:52,564
if it isn't my
fellow O-lympians.
256
00:10:52,564 --> 00:10:53,783
Good work out there
today, boys.
257
00:10:53,783 --> 00:10:55,306
And girl-- haven't
forgotten about you.
258
00:10:55,306 --> 00:10:57,221
Alright,
see ya later.
259
00:10:58,266 --> 00:10:58,701
What up Lar?
260
00:10:58,701 --> 00:10:59,789
I dunno.
261
00:10:59,789 --> 00:11:01,051
So, how's the first
day going
262
00:11:01,051 --> 00:11:02,052
Mr. Professional?
263
00:11:02,052 --> 00:11:03,575
This is horseshit.
264
00:11:03,575 --> 00:11:05,055
Where's the fun,
where's the thrill
265
00:11:05,055 --> 00:11:06,709
of slinging tin
to some dope?
266
00:11:06,709 --> 00:11:07,841
All I've got are
blue balls,
267
00:11:07,841 --> 00:11:09,407
and a bunch of
shapes on a page.
268
00:11:09,407 --> 00:11:11,235
Well here are
some more shapes.
269
00:11:11,235 --> 00:11:13,716
And a few words.
270
00:11:13,716 --> 00:11:14,891
It's the unabridged version.
271
00:11:14,891 --> 00:11:16,588
Yeah it's full of
work place tidbits -
272
00:11:16,588 --> 00:11:17,677
like the history
of the O's Waste
273
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:19,374
Management program,
and the rules you
274
00:11:19,374 --> 00:11:20,636
need to follow so as
not to activate
275
00:11:20,636 --> 00:11:22,507
your firing clause.
276
00:11:22,507 --> 00:11:23,726
What firing clause?
277
00:11:23,726 --> 00:11:24,858
Well contractually
you need to follow a
278
00:11:24,858 --> 00:11:26,729
set of rules or you
can be expelled with
279
00:11:26,729 --> 00:11:28,688
a full severance package.
280
00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:30,298
Are you saying I get
a sweet payday
281
00:11:30,298 --> 00:11:31,734
if I get my
ass fired?
282
00:11:31,734 --> 00:11:34,519
Which means you would
miss out on your future!
283
00:11:34,519 --> 00:11:36,478
So let's review the
O-Mo rule book,
284
00:11:36,478 --> 00:11:38,045
shall we?
285
00:11:38,045 --> 00:11:39,655
Rule number one;
absolutely no
286
00:11:39,655 --> 00:11:41,570
alcohol on the premises.
287
00:11:41,570 --> 00:11:42,919
Rule number two;
employees are
288
00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:44,312
responsible
for the comfort
289
00:11:44,312 --> 00:11:47,054
of their adopted greenery.
290
00:11:47,054 --> 00:11:48,055
Rule number three;
291
00:11:48,055 --> 00:11:49,578
sexual harassment
will not be
292
00:11:49,578 --> 00:11:52,712
tolerated under any circumstances.
293
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:54,235
Richard?
294
00:11:54,235 --> 00:11:56,193
A word.
295
00:11:56,193 --> 00:11:57,717
You gonna severance
me, pops?
296
00:11:57,717 --> 00:11:59,588
The only firing
going on is the fire
297
00:11:59,588 --> 00:12:02,025
you've ignited in
me to get you help.
298
00:12:02,025 --> 00:12:03,766
What're you saying?
299
00:12:03,766 --> 00:12:06,900
Let me make it
perfectly clear.
300
00:12:06,900 --> 00:12:09,729
Does the stone lay
on the earth,
301
00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:12,035
or does the earth
cradle the stone?
302
00:12:12,035 --> 00:12:14,037
There is nothing you
could do to make
303
00:12:14,037 --> 00:12:16,692
me fire you, son.
304
00:12:16,692 --> 00:12:18,781
Nothing.
305
00:12:39,715 --> 00:12:41,673
What are you
doing here?
306
00:12:41,673 --> 00:12:42,674
And where's Richard,
307
00:12:42,674 --> 00:12:43,937
he should have
been here by now?
308
00:12:43,937 --> 00:12:44,764
What does it look like
I'm doing, dipshit.
309
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,591
I found a job.
310
00:12:46,591 --> 00:12:48,593
This is just
a test audience.
311
00:12:48,593 --> 00:12:50,204
All you get are cookies.
312
00:12:50,204 --> 00:12:52,293
And how many cookies did
you earn today, Larry?
313
00:12:52,293 --> 00:12:54,425
Oh,
zero maybe.
314
00:12:54,425 --> 00:12:55,426
Uuuh!
315
00:12:55,426 --> 00:12:56,645
Oh excuse me,
pardon me.
316
00:12:56,645 --> 00:12:58,212
Welcome to the O-mo
focus testing everyone.
317
00:12:58,212 --> 00:12:59,996
please find a seat.
318
00:12:59,996 --> 00:13:02,303
Everybody, if you
would just please
319
00:13:02,303 --> 00:13:03,304
take a seat!
320
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:03,783
Front row!
Front row!
321
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:04,305
Take a seat!
322
00:13:04,305 --> 00:13:05,262
Ok ok ok.
323
00:13:05,262 --> 00:13:07,177
Well, um, ladies
and gentlemen,
324
00:13:07,177 --> 00:13:08,700
it seems like our
esteemed host who
325
00:13:08,700 --> 00:13:10,398
is normally quite
prompt is running
326
00:13:10,398 --> 00:13:13,053
a little behind,
so let's get this
327
00:13:13,053 --> 00:13:14,097
show on the road.
328
00:13:14,097 --> 00:13:15,403
Woooo!
329
00:13:15,403 --> 00:13:20,277
Behind this curtain,
a feast for your eyeballs!
330
00:13:22,845 --> 00:13:23,803
Tah dah!
331
00:13:28,677 --> 00:13:29,939
Dinnerand
a show.
332
00:13:29,939 --> 00:13:33,073
Right? Right?
333
00:13:33,073 --> 00:13:35,989
Is that what
the o is for?
334
00:13:35,989 --> 00:13:37,642
It's one thing to
have carnal
335
00:13:37,642 --> 00:13:39,862
relations with your
first cousin,
336
00:13:39,862 --> 00:13:41,211
but with your
SISTER???
337
00:13:41,211 --> 00:13:43,039
Half-sister.
338
00:13:43,039 --> 00:13:44,388
She's also a Virgo,
339
00:13:44,388 --> 00:13:45,868
my most
bang-able sign.
340
00:13:45,868 --> 00:13:46,869
What happened to
341
00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,305
"hurting the
Fitzy brand?"
342
00:13:48,305 --> 00:13:50,612
You can't even abide
by your own rules!
343
00:13:50,612 --> 00:13:52,353
Yeah, well rule
number one:
344
00:13:52,353 --> 00:13:54,311
I get enough of the
brown happy sauce in me,
345
00:13:54,311 --> 00:13:57,140
and rules no
longer apply.
346
00:13:57,140 --> 00:13:59,839
She's your SISTER!
347
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,101
Listen, I fucked my
way into this problem,
348
00:14:01,101 --> 00:14:02,624
and I can fuck
my way out.
349
00:14:02,624 --> 00:14:04,278
And because of this,
guess who's about
350
00:14:04,278 --> 00:14:06,802
to get sacked with a
nice golden handshake.
351
00:14:06,802 --> 00:14:10,240
Pat Childs is a
good, kind,
352
00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:12,503
and decent man,
who also happens
353
00:14:12,503 --> 00:14:14,723
to be your father.
354
00:14:14,723 --> 00:14:16,594
I hope you can
stomach the pain
355
00:14:16,594 --> 00:14:18,901
in his eyes.
356
00:14:27,736 --> 00:14:31,305
Who's the man
of the hour!
357
00:14:31,305 --> 00:14:33,611
You!
358
00:14:33,611 --> 00:14:35,875
Did you not see what
happened?
359
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,180
I didn't
have to!
360
00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:40,880
But I do know you two
banged this one home!
361
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,403
This is what
it's all about.
362
00:14:42,403 --> 00:14:43,621
Getting to that
next level.
363
00:14:43,621 --> 00:14:44,927
Nice and deep.
364
00:14:44,927 --> 00:14:46,581
What the fuck you
talking about?
365
00:14:46,581 --> 00:14:48,061
Exactly,
Richard.
366
00:14:48,061 --> 00:14:49,323
Did we just
open a door,
367
00:14:49,323 --> 00:14:50,933
or did the
door open us?
368
00:14:50,933 --> 00:14:53,718
Eighteen months of
consumer tests and
369
00:14:53,718 --> 00:14:55,546
we've never had such
positive feedback.
370
00:14:55,546 --> 00:14:57,026
Just listen to this!
371
00:14:57,026 --> 00:14:59,594
"Gave me a
massive woody."
372
00:14:59,594 --> 00:15:02,249
"I came in
my pants."
373
00:15:02,249 --> 00:15:04,947
"Fast, messy, sick!"
374
00:15:04,947 --> 00:15:06,688
Wasn't that fast.
375
00:15:06,688 --> 00:15:07,819
I don't know what
you two did up
376
00:15:07,819 --> 00:15:08,951
there, but I've
never seen feedback
377
00:15:08,951 --> 00:15:10,213
like this before.
378
00:15:10,213 --> 00:15:14,130
"I could hear the
banjo playing."
379
00:15:14,130 --> 00:15:15,566
Okay, that one's a
bit confusing,
380
00:15:15,566 --> 00:15:18,526
but overall these
are off the hook.
381
00:15:18,526 --> 00:15:19,614
Wow.
382
00:15:19,614 --> 00:15:20,658
I've been trying to
turn the heads
383
00:15:20,658 --> 00:15:22,051
of the Kobayashi
investment group
384
00:15:22,051 --> 00:15:23,183
for months.
385
00:15:23,183 --> 00:15:24,575
Guess who contacted
the O-Mo after
386
00:15:24,575 --> 00:15:25,663
reading these
comments?
387
00:15:25,663 --> 00:15:27,404
If we get these
gentlemen to climb
388
00:15:27,404 --> 00:15:29,580
on the O-Mo train,
we'll have the last
389
00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:31,321
piece of our
financial puzzle.
390
00:15:31,321 --> 00:15:33,541
Oh, Father!
391
00:15:33,541 --> 00:15:34,803
They're flying in
tomorrow, and
392
00:15:34,803 --> 00:15:37,066
Richard is going to
get them on board.
393
00:15:37,066 --> 00:15:39,939
Wait, why would
Richard be getting
394
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:41,244
them on board?
395
00:15:41,244 --> 00:15:42,332
Because,
tiger lily,
396
00:15:42,332 --> 00:15:43,812
he's our ace
in the hole.
397
00:15:43,812 --> 00:15:45,814
All these months we
we've had the vision,
398
00:15:45,814 --> 00:15:46,989
we've had the team,
399
00:15:46,989 --> 00:15:49,470
but we were
lacking edge.
400
00:15:49,470 --> 00:15:52,299
With Richard, we
finally have that.
401
00:15:54,562 --> 00:15:56,564
Wait, my chair,
what are you doing?
402
00:15:56,564 --> 00:15:59,828
Giving my newest
protégé a throne,
403
00:15:59,828 --> 00:16:01,264
honeysuckle.
404
00:16:01,264 --> 00:16:02,744
You always loved
your bouncy ball,
405
00:16:02,744 --> 00:16:07,314
didn't you my little
milk thistle?
406
00:16:07,314 --> 00:16:09,751
Giddyup.
407
00:16:16,627 --> 00:16:18,020
Who else do I have
to fuck around here
408
00:16:18,020 --> 00:16:20,544
to get my research?
409
00:16:23,069 --> 00:16:25,985
Here you go,
Mr. Fitzpatrick.
410
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,074
Just like our
father ordered.
411
00:16:28,074 --> 00:16:29,945
Easy there, sister.
412
00:16:29,945 --> 00:16:32,861
Wait am I sensing
a little 'tude?
413
00:16:32,861 --> 00:16:35,298
Nonsense,
brother dearest.
414
00:16:35,298 --> 00:16:36,691
In fact,
I spoke to father
415
00:16:36,691 --> 00:16:37,953
and told him that
you were the one
416
00:16:37,953 --> 00:16:39,172
behind our
"focus group."
417
00:16:39,172 --> 00:16:40,216
You told our father
I took you from
418
00:16:40,216 --> 00:16:43,089
behind in the
focus group?
419
00:16:43,089 --> 00:16:44,090
Listen,
'Fitz.'
420
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:45,091
I'm an Oxford
graduate who
421
00:16:45,091 --> 00:16:46,440
doesn't touch alcohol.
422
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:47,571
I speak four languages,
423
00:16:47,571 --> 00:16:49,573
and have a double
M.B.A. with honours.
424
00:16:49,573 --> 00:16:54,491
You, on the other
hand, are a drunk.
425
00:16:54,491 --> 00:16:59,627
You say that like
it's a bad thing.
426
00:16:59,627 --> 00:17:01,585
I have not worked my
entire life to have
427
00:17:01,585 --> 00:17:03,587
my legacy stolen by
a degenerate inbred
428
00:17:03,587 --> 00:17:06,460
who takes advantage
of his own sister.
429
00:17:06,460 --> 00:17:07,504
If that isn't the
pot calling the
430
00:17:07,504 --> 00:17:09,506
kettle a hypocrite.
431
00:17:09,506 --> 00:17:11,073
Long as I've got
my research,
432
00:17:11,073 --> 00:17:12,944
Fizzy'll
get er done.
433
00:17:12,944 --> 00:17:13,945
Good.
434
00:17:13,945 --> 00:17:15,295
Because you're
on your own.
435
00:17:15,295 --> 00:17:17,340
Bro.
436
00:17:36,011 --> 00:17:37,578
Well played
Wise One.
437
00:17:37,578 --> 00:17:39,406
It looks as if your
plan might work.
438
00:17:39,406 --> 00:17:40,407
What'd I tell you?
439
00:17:40,407 --> 00:17:41,669
Not a pussy
in sight.
440
00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:49,677
When did this place
turn into
441
00:17:49,677 --> 00:17:51,200
a queer palace?
442
00:17:54,116 --> 00:17:58,599
We don't need his
kind here.
443
00:18:01,210 --> 00:18:02,385
What the hell does
she know,
444
00:18:02,385 --> 00:18:04,561
calling me a drunk.
445
00:18:11,046 --> 00:18:13,179
Oh, Hi!
446
00:18:15,746 --> 00:18:16,921
What the fuck's
up your ass?
447
00:18:16,921 --> 00:18:17,966
Oh what?
448
00:18:17,966 --> 00:18:18,967
Nothing.
449
00:18:18,967 --> 00:18:20,142
Just hanging out.
450
00:18:20,142 --> 00:18:21,448
Oh sandwiches, look.
451
00:18:21,448 --> 00:18:24,451
Ooops! Dropped
something.
452
00:18:24,451 --> 00:18:26,627
Are you trying to make
me toss my cookies?
453
00:18:26,627 --> 00:18:27,628
What?
454
00:18:27,628 --> 00:18:29,412
No, I'm trying to
sleep my way to
455
00:18:29,412 --> 00:18:31,240
the top, asshole.
456
00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:33,590
I need you to put in
a good word for me
457
00:18:33,590 --> 00:18:34,896
with Pat Childs.
458
00:18:34,896 --> 00:18:37,899
I'll make it worth
your while.
459
00:18:37,899 --> 00:18:40,641
Ugh! You're his
sister!
460
00:18:40,641 --> 00:18:42,469
Half-sister,
dick-cheese!
461
00:18:42,469 --> 00:18:43,557
Just like what's-
her-tits!
462
00:18:43,557 --> 00:18:45,472
What's good for the
goose is good for
463
00:18:45,472 --> 00:18:47,343
the other goose.
464
00:18:47,343 --> 00:18:50,477
It's the mother-
fucking principal.
465
00:18:54,698 --> 00:18:57,179
You know, Richard
you're not angry
466
00:18:57,179 --> 00:19:00,182
at Paula,
or Meghan, or me.
467
00:19:00,182 --> 00:19:02,576
You are angry at yourself.
468
00:19:02,576 --> 00:19:03,707
Yeah,
469
00:19:03,707 --> 00:19:05,535
for letting you in
my fucking house.
470
00:19:05,535 --> 00:19:07,624
Look, the O-mo has
quarterly profit
471
00:19:07,624 --> 00:19:09,496
projections in
the millions.
472
00:19:09,496 --> 00:19:11,106
And you,
Richard Fitzpatrick,
473
00:19:11,106 --> 00:19:13,064
are not giving it
your all.
474
00:19:13,064 --> 00:19:15,284
She knows that place
from the inside out.
475
00:19:15,284 --> 00:19:17,243
What the fuck am I
supposed to do?
476
00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:18,896
You Stop drinking!
477
00:19:18,896 --> 00:19:20,550
Hey! Hey! Hey!
478
00:19:20,550 --> 00:19:21,725
Booze has gotten
me through
479
00:19:21,725 --> 00:19:22,857
some pretty
hard times.
480
00:19:22,857 --> 00:19:23,858
Booze.
481
00:19:23,858 --> 00:19:24,902
Hard times.
482
00:19:24,902 --> 00:19:27,427
Did you even see
the connection?
483
00:19:27,427 --> 00:19:30,691
You have a chance to
make billions,
484
00:19:30,691 --> 00:19:32,562
to do something
really special.
485
00:19:32,562 --> 00:19:33,563
Look, you want to
make good on this
486
00:19:33,563 --> 00:19:35,478
presentation, Mr.?
487
00:19:35,478 --> 00:19:37,828
You need to face
the music sober.
488
00:19:37,828 --> 00:19:40,091
Even if I do lay
off the sauce
489
00:19:40,091 --> 00:19:41,963
for a few hours,
how am I gonna pull
490
00:19:41,963 --> 00:19:43,878
a fast-one on those
won-ton investors??
491
00:19:43,878 --> 00:19:45,314
Neither one
of us know
492
00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:47,490
a god-damned
thing about the O.
493
00:19:47,490 --> 00:19:48,491
No.
494
00:19:48,491 --> 00:19:52,408
But we know someone
who does.
495
00:19:52,408 --> 00:19:53,801
The O-Mobile.
496
00:19:53,801 --> 00:19:55,803
The O-Mobile is
based on a unique
497
00:19:55,803 --> 00:19:58,197
heliocentric design
that enables a full
498
00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:01,069
range of dynamic motion.
499
00:20:01,069 --> 00:20:05,334
Can we say poly-
gyrational gimbles?
500
00:20:05,334 --> 00:20:06,335
No.
501
00:20:06,335 --> 00:20:09,512
Oh, but yes we can.
502
00:20:09,512 --> 00:20:12,036
Now-- Hey,
pay attention.
503
00:20:12,036 --> 00:20:13,386
I worked hard.
504
00:20:13,386 --> 00:20:15,301
Now if you will
flip to Figure 30
505
00:20:15,301 --> 00:20:16,780
in Appendix C,
we will take a quick
506
00:20:16,780 --> 00:20:17,912
look at the O's
507
00:20:17,912 --> 00:20:19,609
patented wheel tread construction.
508
00:20:19,609 --> 00:20:21,916
which of course
mimics the foot pads
509
00:20:21,916 --> 00:20:24,527
of the Amazonian
tree lizard.
510
00:20:24,527 --> 00:20:27,835
Oh My God!
Oh his right -
511
00:20:31,055 --> 00:20:32,492
Well played, cousin.
512
00:20:32,492 --> 00:20:34,276
You have honored our
makeover with flags
513
00:20:34,276 --> 00:20:36,626
of the two manliest
nations on earth.
514
00:20:36,626 --> 00:20:37,671
Guinea.
515
00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:39,063
Who trade women
like cattle.
516
00:20:39,063 --> 00:20:40,151
And Chad.
517
00:20:40,151 --> 00:20:41,544
Who have wisely kept
the vaginal ones
518
00:20:41,544 --> 00:20:43,503
from accessing its
education system.
519
00:20:43,503 --> 00:20:44,504
Cousin,
is it just me,
520
00:20:44,504 --> 00:20:45,592
or does our bastion
of manliness
521
00:20:45,592 --> 00:20:47,681
seem too cluttered?
522
00:20:47,681 --> 00:20:49,422
Your instincts are
sound, cousin.
523
00:20:49,422 --> 00:20:51,859
We must unite these
stripes of honour
524
00:20:51,859 --> 00:20:54,296
into a single flag
that we can
525
00:20:54,296 --> 00:20:57,517
call our own.
526
00:21:14,925 --> 00:21:15,970
At last, cousin.
527
00:21:15,970 --> 00:21:17,667
The natural order
has returned.
528
00:21:17,667 --> 00:21:19,147
Not a single woman
in sight.
529
00:21:19,147 --> 00:21:21,323
Their feminine
agenda cowers in the
530
00:21:21,323 --> 00:21:23,456
face of our stout-
hearted virility.
531
00:21:23,456 --> 00:21:25,414
This is no longer a
bar, Cousin,
532
00:21:25,414 --> 00:21:26,676
it is a cave.
533
00:21:26,676 --> 00:21:28,417
are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
534
00:21:28,417 --> 00:21:30,898
Yes! We will rename
our bar "The Cave."
535
00:21:30,898 --> 00:21:34,205
Oh, I will go you
one further.
536
00:21:34,205 --> 00:21:36,643
The Bear Cave!
537
00:21:36,643 --> 00:21:37,339
Yes!
538
00:21:39,515 --> 00:21:41,082
It's a full range of
dynamic motion
539
00:21:41,082 --> 00:21:44,738
thanks to it's
patented Gy - "
540
00:21:44,738 --> 00:21:46,392
It's a full range of
dynamic motion
541
00:21:46,392 --> 00:21:49,569
thanks to it's
patented Poly -
542
00:21:49,569 --> 00:21:51,353
Richard, the mountain
before you steep.
543
00:21:51,353 --> 00:21:53,312
You can still return
to base camp.
544
00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:54,356
Back off,
pan-flute.
545
00:21:54,356 --> 00:21:56,532
I've got this.
546
00:21:56,532 --> 00:21:58,969
I know that.
547
00:21:58,969 --> 00:22:01,363
You're my son.
548
00:22:01,363 --> 00:22:05,106
I have complete
faith in you.
549
00:22:13,027 --> 00:22:15,595
Ah. Konnichiwa
please come in.
550
00:22:17,597 --> 00:22:20,730
Konnichiwa, thank you,
please have a seat.
551
00:22:20,730 --> 00:22:21,775
Konnichiwa
552
00:22:23,124 --> 00:22:24,386
Whatever the case, Richard.
553
00:22:24,386 --> 00:22:26,170
I'm your ballast.
554
00:22:26,170 --> 00:22:29,391
Your bastion of calm.
555
00:22:29,391 --> 00:22:31,001
Please.
556
00:22:37,268 --> 00:22:40,968
Ring-a-ding ding, baby.
557
00:22:40,968 --> 00:22:42,317
Good afternoon.
558
00:22:42,317 --> 00:22:44,275
My name is Richard Fitzpatrick,
559
00:22:44,275 --> 00:22:46,147
and I'm here
to tell you about
560
00:22:46,147 --> 00:22:48,715
O-Mobile
Incorporated .
561
00:22:57,898 --> 00:23:02,337
What's the matter,
Larry?
562
00:23:02,337 --> 00:23:04,861
You don't like the
horror show?
563
00:23:04,861 --> 00:23:08,430
Shouldn't you be
with your father?
564
00:23:08,430 --> 00:23:13,217
Don't you mean
Fitz' father?
565
00:23:13,217 --> 00:23:16,612
I thought you
didn't drink.
566
00:23:16,612 --> 00:23:20,442
All these years of
herbal tea this and
567
00:23:20,442 --> 00:23:21,617
hormone-free that.
568
00:23:21,617 --> 00:23:22,618
What's the point?
The world is going
569
00:23:22,618 --> 00:23:25,882
to hell in a hand
basket anyway.
570
00:23:25,882 --> 00:23:28,058
But your father
will save it.
571
00:23:31,801 --> 00:23:38,634
Father's not who
you think he is.
572
00:23:38,634 --> 00:23:40,680
You wanna see
something, Larry?
573
00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:42,159
Uh-uh.
574
00:23:58,262 --> 00:24:01,788
Okay, the 0-mo,
inspired by
575
00:24:01,788 --> 00:24:04,138
paleolithic
engineers,
576
00:24:04,138 --> 00:24:05,705
is based on a unique heliocentric,
577
00:24:05,705 --> 00:24:09,665
single track design,
enjoying a full
578
00:24:09,665 --> 00:24:14,235
range of poly-
gyrational gimbles.
579
00:24:14,235 --> 00:24:17,934
The O-mo is impact absorbent,
580
00:24:17,934 --> 00:24:20,546
and of course,
fully-integrated
581
00:24:20,546 --> 00:24:23,810
with social networking capability.
582
00:24:27,117 --> 00:24:29,076
Introducing a
revolutionary new
583
00:24:29,076 --> 00:24:31,557
phase in personal
transit for the
584
00:24:31,557 --> 00:24:33,341
modern urbanist.
585
00:24:33,341 --> 00:24:35,212
The O-mo,
designed for the
586
00:24:35,212 --> 00:24:37,737
world of tomorrow.
587
00:24:40,174 --> 00:24:43,917
Oh My!
588
00:24:43,917 --> 00:24:48,487
Elaine?
589
00:24:48,487 --> 00:24:53,274
The Sniper!
590
00:24:53,274 --> 00:24:54,928
The fire!
591
00:24:54,928 --> 00:24:57,539
Every bad thing that
has ever happened to
592
00:24:57,539 --> 00:25:00,063
the Fitzpatricks.
593
00:25:00,063 --> 00:25:02,762
All father.
594
00:25:04,633 --> 00:25:08,202
And in conclusion,
the O is infinite.
595
00:25:08,202 --> 00:25:11,074
The O is eternal.
596
00:25:11,074 --> 00:25:14,730
The O is the Future.
597
00:25:14,730 --> 00:25:17,080
Thank you.
598
00:25:27,438 --> 00:25:28,875
These came
in for you.
599
00:25:28,875 --> 00:25:30,790
Son.
600
00:26:00,254 --> 00:26:01,908
WHO NEEDS WOMEN!
601
00:26:04,084 --> 00:26:05,564
Oh, the Pasty,
Aged One has
602
00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:07,304
delivered his end
of the bargain.
603
00:26:07,304 --> 00:26:10,569
And so, cousin,
shall we.
604
00:26:57,485 --> 00:26:59,487
"You are a drunk."
605
00:27:02,708 --> 00:27:07,538
"You need to face
the music sober"
606
00:27:37,133 --> 00:27:39,179
"You're my son,
607
00:27:39,179 --> 00:27:42,573
I have complete
faith in you"
608
00:28:15,084 --> 00:28:16,129
Oh no!
40467
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