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1
00:00:05,271 --> 00:00:06,673
You like it?
2
00:00:06,773 --> 00:00:09,609
Like it? I love it.
This is a great column.
3
00:00:09,709 --> 00:00:11,811
Is Emma this funny
and bright in person?
4
00:00:11,911 --> 00:00:15,782
Ah, typical writer, more funny
on the page than in person.
5
00:00:15,882 --> 00:00:17,951
Well, I think it's great.
I hope she does some more.
6
00:00:18,051 --> 00:00:20,286
I think her column
would add a lot to the paper.
7
00:00:20,387 --> 00:00:23,823
See, aren't you glad I brought
the two of you together?
8
00:00:23,923 --> 00:00:25,658
Yeah. It's great.
9
00:00:31,231 --> 00:00:32,799
I know, I know.
It feels like a lot.
10
00:00:32,899 --> 00:00:34,334
Your mom moving to Arizona
for two months and all,
11
00:00:34,434 --> 00:00:37,103
but you'll handle it. Look.
12
00:00:37,203 --> 00:00:40,273
If things get a little crazy,
you still got me, right?
13
00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:42,776
That's sweet of you to say,
but you know I still haven't
14
00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:45,612
figured out
why you don't just find someone
15
00:00:45,712 --> 00:00:47,514
without all these
responsibilities in the way.
16
00:00:47,614 --> 00:00:49,115
You know,
someone you can just pick up
17
00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:50,717
and go to the beach with.
18
00:00:50,817 --> 00:00:52,652
Your responsibilities
are not in the way.
19
00:00:52,752 --> 00:00:54,521
I hardly notice them.
20
00:00:54,621 --> 00:00:55,555
Besides, I'm getting sick
of the beach.
21
00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:58,024
Hold on a second.
22
00:01:02,629 --> 00:01:07,000
Oh, yes, yes, yes!
23
00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:09,502
Oh, not this again.
24
00:01:09,602 --> 00:01:11,371
Who do you think she
has in there with her?
25
00:01:11,471 --> 00:01:15,442
Oh, David!
26
00:01:18,111 --> 00:01:19,579
David.
27
00:01:21,147 --> 00:01:22,882
Are you going
to help me out or not?
28
00:01:22,982 --> 00:01:26,186
Val, come on...
29
00:01:26,286 --> 00:01:28,088
Last night.
This morning.
30
00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:29,355
They're never going to buy this.
31
00:01:29,456 --> 00:01:30,423
This is ridiculous.
Have you lost your mind?
32
00:01:30,523 --> 00:01:32,092
Oh, yes they will, okay?
33
00:01:32,192 --> 00:01:34,194
Just we... we need people
talking, all right?
34
00:01:36,129 --> 00:01:37,464
Do you want Donna back or not?
35
00:01:45,004 --> 00:01:46,072
Okay.
Okay. Come on.
36
00:01:47,807 --> 00:01:48,775
Okay.
37
00:01:48,875 --> 00:01:51,244
Okay.
38
00:01:51,344 --> 00:01:52,378
Oh, yeah.
39
00:01:52,479 --> 00:01:54,214
Oh, yes!
Yes, yes!
40
00:01:54,314 --> 00:01:56,916
David. Who knew?
41
00:01:57,016 --> 00:01:58,518
Well, not Donna.
42
00:01:58,618 --> 00:02:00,753
I didn't think
he had it in him.
43
00:02:00,854 --> 00:02:02,655
Somehow, I knew Valerie did.
44
00:02:05,725 --> 00:02:06,926
Would I like her?
45
00:02:07,026 --> 00:02:09,629
Who?
Emma.
46
00:02:09,729 --> 00:02:11,931
I feel like I know
her from her column.
47
00:02:12,031 --> 00:02:13,133
What does she look like?
48
00:02:13,233 --> 00:02:16,202
She looks like, um...
49
00:02:16,302 --> 00:02:18,705
a girl, you know?
Just looks like a normal girl.
50
00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:22,108
Oh, a normal girl.
That's a vivid picture.
51
00:02:22,208 --> 00:02:24,644
Men never pay attention
to anything.
52
00:02:24,744 --> 00:02:26,913
She's a good writer.
That's all I care about.
53
00:02:27,013 --> 00:02:29,249
She is a great writer.
54
00:02:29,349 --> 00:02:31,184
You know, Brandon,
I would really love to meet her.
55
00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:52,498
♪ You can't see it coming ♪
56
00:03:52,599 --> 00:03:55,034
♪ Until it's too late ♪
57
00:03:55,134 --> 00:03:57,870
♪ You're struck down
by the hand of fate ♪
58
00:03:57,971 --> 00:04:03,076
♪ You don't see the difference
with or without ♪
59
00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:06,346
♪ And when you do,
it's always too late ♪
60
00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:12,852
♪ Ooh, it's all sunshine ♪
61
00:04:12,952 --> 00:04:16,356
♪ Or it's all rain ♪
62
00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:21,661
♪ Ooh, it's all sunshine ♪
63
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:23,663
♪ Or it's all rain... ♪
64
00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:25,665
Oh, there he is!
65
00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:26,899
Are you walking
bow legged?
66
00:04:30,036 --> 00:04:30,903
It wasn't like it sounded.
67
00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:32,772
No, of course not.
68
00:04:32,872 --> 00:04:34,007
If it was, you'd be dead.
69
00:04:35,308 --> 00:04:38,711
That's very funny stuff, Steve.
70
00:04:38,811 --> 00:04:40,713
You should perform at the
After Dark on comedy night.
71
00:04:40,813 --> 00:04:42,282
I'll put in a good word
with Val.
72
00:04:42,382 --> 00:04:43,750
Mmm. I'm sure
you will.
73
00:04:43,850 --> 00:04:44,951
Hey, you know,
David, I never got
74
00:04:45,051 --> 00:04:46,552
a security
deposit from Val,
75
00:04:46,653 --> 00:04:48,521
so no structural damage
to my house, okay?
76
00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:52,692
Okay, you know what? I-I can't
deal with this right now.
77
00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:53,893
I'm starting
my new career today.
78
00:04:53,993 --> 00:04:56,062
Hmm?
79
00:04:56,362 --> 00:04:59,032
Okay, it's a car wash,
but it's a job, right?
80
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:01,301
That it is.
81
00:05:01,401 --> 00:05:03,303
Waxing.
J-O-B.
82
00:05:03,403 --> 00:05:04,737
Waxing.
Wax on.
83
00:05:04,837 --> 00:05:06,739
So unsupportive in this house.
84
00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:10,810
I'll get it.
85
00:05:10,910 --> 00:05:12,111
Hey, Donna.
86
00:05:12,211 --> 00:05:13,613
Hey. I need your help.
87
00:05:13,713 --> 00:05:14,947
What?
88
00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:16,749
Okay. This afternoon I have
89
00:05:16,849 --> 00:05:18,418
probably the most important
photo shoot of my career.
90
00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:19,786
Everything is set.
91
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,587
The photographer--
Annika Ward.
92
00:05:21,688 --> 00:05:24,324
Ooh, you're working with
Annika Ward? That's awesome.
93
00:05:24,424 --> 00:05:27,593
Yeah, except my model called
this morning. She has mono.
94
00:05:27,694 --> 00:05:30,063
Oh, I'm sorry. Is there
anything I can do?
95
00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:32,298
Well, there is one thing.
96
00:05:32,398 --> 00:05:34,701
What?
Be my model.
97
00:05:34,801 --> 00:05:37,537
Donna, I haven't modeled
for years. There's no way I...
98
00:05:37,637 --> 00:05:39,038
Yes, you could.
99
00:05:39,138 --> 00:05:41,274
You'd be great. Please, I've
worked with so many models
100
00:05:41,374 --> 00:05:43,943
and you put them all to shame.
101
00:05:44,043 --> 00:05:47,313
So, what you're saying is, you
can't find anybody else, right?
102
00:05:47,413 --> 00:05:48,314
And you're desperate?
103
00:05:48,414 --> 00:05:50,650
Totally desperate. Mm-hmm.
104
00:05:50,750 --> 00:05:52,785
Well, I do have to go
in to work today,
105
00:05:52,885 --> 00:05:54,687
but I could ask
for the afternoon off.
106
00:05:54,787 --> 00:05:56,823
Oh, that would be so great.
107
00:05:56,923 --> 00:05:58,191
Okay, I just need
your portfolio.
108
00:05:58,291 --> 00:05:59,392
I just have
to show it to Annika.
109
00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,260
All right, I will go upstairs
110
00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:02,295
and try to dig out my book.
111
00:06:02,395 --> 00:06:06,699
Thank you. Thank you.
112
00:06:08,968 --> 00:06:10,169
Hey.
113
00:06:12,805 --> 00:06:14,140
Ah. You're alive.
114
00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:16,008
I was wondering,
115
00:06:16,109 --> 00:06:17,910
since you didn't come back
to the apartment last night.
116
00:06:18,010 --> 00:06:21,914
Well, we don't owe each other
any explanations anymore.
117
00:06:22,014 --> 00:06:22,982
You made that very clear.
118
00:06:27,987 --> 00:06:31,190
I'm sorry.
I should have called.
119
00:06:31,290 --> 00:06:35,228
No, I was just worried when
you didn't come home last night.
120
00:06:36,696 --> 00:06:38,197
Well, you don't have
to worry about him, Donna.
121
00:06:39,932 --> 00:06:44,470
Actually, uh, David
did come home last night.
122
00:06:53,813 --> 00:06:56,416
Fine, it's all my fault.
123
00:06:56,516 --> 00:06:59,585
Oh, look, rationalize it
any way you want.
124
00:06:59,685 --> 00:07:01,721
Look, I am not
going through this again.
125
00:07:01,821 --> 00:07:04,090
It is over.
126
00:07:08,795 --> 00:07:12,465
I have to get back to work.
127
00:07:12,565 --> 00:07:13,900
I'm sorry to interrupt,
128
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:15,635
but we're really getting
backed up out there.
129
00:07:15,735 --> 00:07:19,405
No, no, I'm sorry. I'm the one
who should apologize. I just...
130
00:07:19,705 --> 00:07:20,807
My wife...
131
00:07:20,907 --> 00:07:22,642
Um...
132
00:07:22,742 --> 00:07:24,076
I'll be with you
in just a minute.
133
00:07:24,177 --> 00:07:26,312
Okay.
134
00:07:26,412 --> 00:07:27,914
Um...
135
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:29,482
Dr. Monahan, I was
hoping that I could
136
00:07:29,582 --> 00:07:31,417
take this afternoon off.
137
00:07:31,517 --> 00:07:33,052
We haven't been
getting along for...
138
00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:35,621
for years.
139
00:07:37,557 --> 00:07:40,560
At this point, the only option
really is separation.
140
00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:43,996
Unfortunately, my wife
doesn't see it that way.
141
00:07:44,096 --> 00:07:45,598
I'm sorry to hear that.
142
00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:48,334
I'm afraid our relationship
just isn't what it used to be.
143
00:07:48,434 --> 00:07:50,837
It's lost its magic.
144
00:07:50,937 --> 00:07:53,806
Used to be, we were, uh...
145
00:07:53,906 --> 00:07:56,375
this close.
146
00:07:59,111 --> 00:08:00,947
The patients?
Now all we've got
147
00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:03,149
is this distance-- this
horrible, horrible distance.
148
00:08:05,351 --> 00:08:07,887
Something I hope you never
have to experience, Kelly.
149
00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:15,761
Well...
150
00:08:15,862 --> 00:08:20,032
Let's, um, let's get
to those patients, shall we?
151
00:08:35,948 --> 00:08:37,950
Hey, how you doing?
152
00:08:38,050 --> 00:08:39,018
I'm David Silver. I'm supposed
to be starting today.
153
00:08:39,118 --> 00:08:41,053
Uh-huh.
154
00:08:41,153 --> 00:08:44,056
And what exactly am I supposed
to do with that information?
155
00:08:44,156 --> 00:08:47,326
Well, I was just...
156
00:08:47,426 --> 00:08:48,127
I'd punch in if I were you.
157
00:08:49,395 --> 00:08:50,429
But that's just me.
158
00:08:52,098 --> 00:08:53,466
Time clock's inside.
159
00:08:55,101 --> 00:08:56,202
In here?
160
00:08:56,302 --> 00:08:59,071
Is this the locker room?
161
00:08:59,171 --> 00:09:00,339
If you want to call it that.
162
00:09:13,185 --> 00:09:14,453
Hey, that's mine.
163
00:09:17,256 --> 00:09:20,993
Oh, sorry. I, uh...
I'm looking for the time clock.
164
00:09:26,532 --> 00:09:28,801
Thanks.
165
00:09:30,336 --> 00:09:31,337
So, you work here, huh?
166
00:09:31,437 --> 00:09:32,772
Yeah, yeah, first day.
167
00:09:32,872 --> 00:09:34,607
Bad move.
168
00:09:34,707 --> 00:09:37,510
Yeah. I know,
but it's a job.
169
00:09:38,811 --> 00:09:40,179
I'm David.
170
00:09:40,279 --> 00:09:42,381
Ben.
171
00:09:42,481 --> 00:09:45,217
How you doing, man?
Nice to meet you.
172
00:09:45,318 --> 00:09:47,587
I could never handle waiting tables.
173
00:09:47,687 --> 00:09:49,722
My last job lasted ten minutes.
174
00:09:49,822 --> 00:09:51,691
Everything was great
until I asked this lady
175
00:09:51,791 --> 00:09:54,026
if she wanted fruit or flies
with her burger.
176
00:09:55,695 --> 00:09:56,596
That's my set.
177
00:09:58,531 --> 00:10:01,601
Fruit or fries, fruit or flies?
You get it?
178
00:10:01,701 --> 00:10:02,868
I get it.
179
00:10:04,170 --> 00:10:05,438
Next.
180
00:10:10,710 --> 00:10:12,178
Okay, should I just start?
181
00:10:13,846 --> 00:10:16,549
Who's out here from L.A.?
182
00:10:16,649 --> 00:10:18,284
I mean...
183
00:10:18,384 --> 00:10:19,251
who's from L.A. out here?
184
00:10:19,352 --> 00:10:20,720
Nobody?
185
00:10:20,820 --> 00:10:22,888
Can I start again?
186
00:10:22,989 --> 00:10:25,257
Anybody here from L.A.?
187
00:10:25,358 --> 00:10:26,492
Hey, Noah.
188
00:10:26,592 --> 00:10:28,227
Valerie been
around yet today?
189
00:10:28,327 --> 00:10:29,629
She should be. Why?
190
00:10:29,729 --> 00:10:31,664
Well, I just wanted to
make sure she's all right
191
00:10:31,764 --> 00:10:32,999
after last night.
192
00:10:33,099 --> 00:10:35,334
Last night?
Why wouldn't she be?
193
00:10:35,434 --> 00:10:37,737
Well, I guess you didn't hear.
194
00:10:37,837 --> 00:10:42,742
Well, David and Valerie
kind of crashed...
195
00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:43,976
into each other.
196
00:10:45,277 --> 00:10:47,747
I'll pass along
your concern, okay?
197
00:10:47,847 --> 00:10:49,415
Well, that might not
be for a few days.
198
00:10:49,515 --> 00:10:50,983
She's probably still
with the paramedics.
199
00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:54,687
Funny man.
Yeah.
200
00:10:54,787 --> 00:10:56,789
You can tell a lot
about a person from the kind
201
00:10:56,889 --> 00:10:58,691
of pet they have.
202
00:10:58,791 --> 00:11:00,026
Dogs are like....
203
00:11:01,260 --> 00:11:02,461
"No problem by me."
204
00:11:02,561 --> 00:11:06,832
But cats, cats are....
205
00:11:06,932 --> 00:11:09,035
They're like...
206
00:11:09,135 --> 00:11:10,836
Cats are...
207
00:11:12,438 --> 00:11:14,407
They just, like, lie there.
208
00:11:18,144 --> 00:11:19,045
I'm serious.
209
00:11:19,145 --> 00:11:21,347
I'm funnier than that.
210
00:11:21,447 --> 00:11:24,684
Road kill is funnier than that.
211
00:11:24,784 --> 00:11:26,285
...mudslides and the fires.
212
00:11:26,385 --> 00:11:28,154
You could do better?
213
00:11:28,254 --> 00:11:29,822
Heck, yeah.
214
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:31,357
I was the funniest guy
in my fraternity.
215
00:11:33,459 --> 00:11:34,994
I'm curious, how
does one decide that?
216
00:11:35,094 --> 00:11:37,229
Over a lot of beer.
217
00:11:37,329 --> 00:11:40,366
How else?
Right.
218
00:11:40,466 --> 00:11:41,667
Why don't you audition
for comedy night?
219
00:11:41,767 --> 00:11:44,537
I think I just might do that.
220
00:11:44,637 --> 00:11:46,872
Dust off some of my killer
one-liners and have at it.
221
00:11:46,972 --> 00:11:48,708
Just dust 'em off in a hurry.
222
00:11:48,808 --> 00:11:51,811
This is killing me.
223
00:11:51,911 --> 00:11:54,313
I'm serious.
224
00:11:59,452 --> 00:12:02,188
I think this article's going to
strike a cord with our readers.
225
00:12:02,288 --> 00:12:04,523
Just the readers?
226
00:12:06,525 --> 00:12:08,194
You know what I'd like?
227
00:12:08,294 --> 00:12:10,329
I'd like you to write
another article for us.
228
00:12:10,429 --> 00:12:12,364
In fact, I'd like you
to write a series
229
00:12:12,465 --> 00:12:14,233
of articles for us.
230
00:12:14,333 --> 00:12:15,534
A series of them, huh?
231
00:12:15,634 --> 00:12:17,536
Well, I don't know.
232
00:12:17,636 --> 00:12:18,738
I'm really busy.
233
00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:24,110
But I'm open to persuasion.
234
00:12:24,210 --> 00:12:26,445
Based on your phone call
last night,
235
00:12:26,545 --> 00:12:28,280
I'd say you're open
to a little more than that.
236
00:12:28,380 --> 00:12:29,515
I am.
237
00:12:29,615 --> 00:12:31,016
The question is:
Are you?
238
00:12:33,152 --> 00:12:35,554
About your articles...
The ones you're going
239
00:12:35,654 --> 00:12:36,589
to persuade me
to write over lunch?
240
00:12:36,689 --> 00:12:37,723
Lunch?
241
00:12:37,823 --> 00:12:40,826
Well, I have to drop off
a freelance piece
242
00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:43,262
at Buzz magazine,
shouldn't take very long.
243
00:12:43,362 --> 00:12:46,232
Shall we say half hour,
The Natural Gourmet?
244
00:12:46,332 --> 00:12:48,567
Sounds good.
245
00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:52,171
I'm feeling persuaded already.
246
00:12:54,039 --> 00:12:55,508
Hi.
247
00:12:56,475 --> 00:12:58,077
Hey, uh,
248
00:12:58,177 --> 00:13:00,446
Emma Bennett this
is Kelly Taylor.
249
00:13:00,546 --> 00:13:02,014
Oh, hi.
Hi. Nice to meet you.
250
00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:03,149
Nice to meet you.
251
00:13:03,249 --> 00:13:04,950
Brandon showed me your
column, I loved it.
252
00:13:05,050 --> 00:13:06,285
Thanks.
I'm glad you're writing for the paper.
253
00:13:06,385 --> 00:13:07,720
I hope you do more.
254
00:13:07,820 --> 00:13:10,389
Well, I'm in the
process of being
255
00:13:10,489 --> 00:13:11,657
convinced to do just that.
256
00:13:11,757 --> 00:13:12,758
Oh, you have to.
257
00:13:12,858 --> 00:13:14,260
Well, we'll see.
258
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:16,629
I'm late. It was
very nice to meet you.
259
00:13:16,862 --> 00:13:18,330
And I'll see you later.
260
00:13:18,430 --> 00:13:20,065
Bye.
Talk to you later.
261
00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:23,169
She seems so nice.
262
00:13:23,269 --> 00:13:25,337
Yeah, yeah, she's okay.
263
00:13:25,437 --> 00:13:27,072
I, um, I have some time
264
00:13:27,173 --> 00:13:28,774
before I have to go do
that thing with Donna
265
00:13:28,874 --> 00:13:30,009
and I was thinking
it would be nice
266
00:13:30,109 --> 00:13:32,411
if we had lunch.
267
00:13:34,113 --> 00:13:36,115
I'd love to, Kel.
268
00:13:36,215 --> 00:13:37,483
I would, but, uh,
269
00:13:37,583 --> 00:13:39,585
today is a nightmare.
270
00:13:39,685 --> 00:13:41,987
I'm gonna end up
eating here at my desk
271
00:13:42,087 --> 00:13:43,689
if I even get to eat at all.
272
00:13:43,789 --> 00:13:44,857
How about tomorrow?
273
00:13:44,957 --> 00:13:47,326
Okay, tomorrow.
274
00:13:48,727 --> 00:13:49,829
Bye.
275
00:13:59,171 --> 00:14:00,906
Thank you for coming through for me on this one.
276
00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:02,842
I should be thanking you.
277
00:14:02,942 --> 00:14:04,710
I haven't felt that
glamorous lately.
278
00:14:04,810 --> 00:14:06,412
To be honest with you,
279
00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:07,880
I haven't really
felt that desirable
280
00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:10,049
so I think that this is
going to be a good thing.
281
00:14:10,149 --> 00:14:11,383
How are you?
282
00:14:11,483 --> 00:14:12,952
How did things go
after this morning?
283
00:14:13,052 --> 00:14:15,888
What, seeing Val
and David together?
284
00:14:15,988 --> 00:14:18,457
Well, about a zillion things
went through my mind.
285
00:14:18,557 --> 00:14:21,193
And I thought I acted all
adult and mature and cool,
286
00:14:21,293 --> 00:14:23,963
but deep down, I just wanted
to strangle them both.
287
00:14:24,063 --> 00:14:26,599
What about Noah, have
you talked to him?
288
00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:28,100
No, but my guess is
he feels the same way.
289
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:30,202
Whatever, right?
290
00:14:30,302 --> 00:14:32,471
Anyway, um, this is
your dressing room,
291
00:14:32,571 --> 00:14:34,039
and there's
a fridge and a phone
292
00:14:34,139 --> 00:14:35,875
and someone from make-up
will come and get you
293
00:14:35,975 --> 00:14:37,309
and I'm gonna run to
wardrobe, are you okay?
294
00:14:37,409 --> 00:14:38,611
Yeah.
295
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:39,912
Thanks again, Donna.
296
00:14:40,012 --> 00:14:42,014
Thank you.
297
00:14:58,197 --> 00:15:00,900
The Beat.
298
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:03,102
Hi, Terri. It's Kelly.
Is Brandon there?
299
00:15:03,202 --> 00:15:05,137
No, he's not back
from lunch yet.
300
00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:06,772
He went to lunch?
301
00:15:06,872 --> 00:15:08,841
I thought he had
a lot of work to do.
302
00:15:08,941 --> 00:15:10,409
I'm sure.
303
00:15:10,509 --> 00:15:12,011
One of the perks of being boss
is that he just can
304
00:15:12,111 --> 00:15:13,479
dump it on me.
305
00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:15,648
Okay, bye.
306
00:15:24,023 --> 00:15:25,624
You'll have complete freedom,
307
00:15:25,724 --> 00:15:27,660
not a single word of
yours will be touched.
308
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:29,495
But if I need a sounding board
you're available, right?
309
00:15:29,595 --> 00:15:31,096
Absolutely.
310
00:15:31,196 --> 00:15:32,531
Day or night?
311
00:15:32,631 --> 00:15:35,301
I tend to get a little
inspired after hours.
312
00:15:35,401 --> 00:15:38,637
Why do I get the feeling that
every conversation we have
313
00:15:38,737 --> 00:15:40,639
is about something
neither of us is saying?
314
00:15:40,739 --> 00:15:42,775
Try something you aren't saying.
315
00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:44,610
I say what's on my mind.
316
00:15:44,710 --> 00:15:45,945
My mind's on business.
317
00:15:46,045 --> 00:15:48,314
Is that right?
318
00:15:50,149 --> 00:15:51,684
85 percent.
319
00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:56,188
75 percent?
320
00:15:58,657 --> 00:16:01,593
Would you believe 50/50?
321
00:16:03,329 --> 00:16:04,663
You're cute.
322
00:16:04,763 --> 00:16:06,865
You know what?
323
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:09,134
Something tells me you might
be able to convince me.
324
00:16:09,234 --> 00:16:11,837
Seriously?
325
00:16:14,473 --> 00:16:16,809
Well,
326
00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:19,845
having said that, the
business half of this lunch
327
00:16:19,945 --> 00:16:22,047
is now officially over.
328
00:16:24,316 --> 00:16:26,719
I would like to get on
with the other 50 percent.
329
00:16:28,187 --> 00:16:29,822
Are you free the rest
of the afternoon?
330
00:16:45,170 --> 00:16:48,540
Hey, stop that, Dougie, that's sexual harassment.
331
00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:50,242
You're right.
332
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:51,643
I'm sorry, Ben.
333
00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:53,078
How about later I
make it up to you?
334
00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:55,781
Take you shopping
for a new dress.
335
00:16:57,182 --> 00:16:58,283
Why don't you shut your mouth.
336
00:16:58,384 --> 00:17:00,052
Ooh!
Ooh!
337
00:17:02,554 --> 00:17:04,757
Boy, it didn't take you two
boys very long to bond, huh?
338
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:07,559
I guess you got
quite a bit in common.
339
00:17:07,659 --> 00:17:08,794
You queer, too, Davey?
340
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:23,976
Burger and fries on eleven,
chili dog no onions on nine.
341
00:17:24,076 --> 00:17:26,512
Come on, it'll only
take ten minutes
342
00:17:26,612 --> 00:17:27,980
and it's right next door, Carly.
343
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:29,581
Steve, no way,
we're swamped.
344
00:17:29,681 --> 00:17:31,116
But I want you to
see my audition.
345
00:17:31,216 --> 00:17:32,985
Critique it, tell me
if I'm funny or not. It's funny.
346
00:17:33,085 --> 00:17:34,520
You haven't even
heard my act.
347
00:17:34,620 --> 00:17:36,288
Well, if it's half as funny
as you asking me to leave
348
00:17:36,388 --> 00:17:37,456
Nat during the lunch rush,
349
00:17:37,556 --> 00:17:38,657
you'll have them
rolling in the aisles.
350
00:17:38,757 --> 00:17:39,792
Well, at least you
can wish me luck.
351
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:42,494
You don't need luck,
not when you got talent.
352
00:17:44,596 --> 00:17:47,766
So, uh, my girlfriend, you know,
she says that I'm selfish right,
353
00:17:47,866 --> 00:17:50,969
and I say, "No, I'm not,
like, what do you mean?"
354
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:52,971
I said, "Didn't I buy
ribbed condoms?"
355
00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:55,040
And she says, uh, "Yeah, but
you wore them inside out."
356
00:17:56,375 --> 00:17:59,011
Okay, uh... I don't know.
357
00:17:59,111 --> 00:18:00,846
Can you believe this?
You think that was bad,
358
00:18:00,946 --> 00:18:02,147
you should've been
here this morning.
359
00:18:02,247 --> 00:18:03,449
But I understand
you needed your rest.
360
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:06,351
What's that supposed to mean?
361
00:18:06,452 --> 00:18:09,021
I heard you and David had
quite a night last night.
362
00:18:09,121 --> 00:18:12,024
I can't believe what idle
gossips people can be.
363
00:18:12,124 --> 00:18:13,559
Oh, like you didn't
sleep with him.
364
00:18:13,659 --> 00:18:16,328
As if that's any
of your business.
365
00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:20,032
Let's just say I go for the
struggling car wash type.
366
00:18:20,132 --> 00:18:21,567
He was with Donna for so long,
367
00:18:21,667 --> 00:18:25,003
David needed to burn off a
little energy, that's all.
368
00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:26,839
All I know that is if my
girlfriend was a car...
369
00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:30,375
Well, all I know that
if, if, if, if, if.
370
00:18:30,476 --> 00:18:32,544
All I know is I spend about
371
00:18:32,644 --> 00:18:34,713
$16 thousand
worth of accessories
372
00:18:34,813 --> 00:18:36,048
and about eight dollars
worth of car.
373
00:18:38,150 --> 00:18:41,053
Thanks. Uh, we'll
let you know.
374
00:18:41,153 --> 00:18:44,056
Oh, all right.
375
00:18:44,156 --> 00:18:46,225
You're up, buddy.
376
00:18:46,325 --> 00:18:48,026
Well, here goes.
377
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:49,862
Good luck.
378
00:18:54,433 --> 00:18:55,434
How's everybody
doing tonight, good?
379
00:18:55,534 --> 00:18:57,703
Great...
380
00:18:57,803 --> 00:19:02,174
So, uh, I'm taking
these self-defense classes
381
00:19:02,274 --> 00:19:06,178
and after about 10 weeks,
50 bucks a pop,
382
00:19:06,278 --> 00:19:10,115
the instructor says to me,
"Oh, Steve, by the way,
383
00:19:10,215 --> 00:19:14,620
use this only
if you get attacked."
384
00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:16,088
Yeah, right.
385
00:19:16,188 --> 00:19:17,523
Like you go to medical school
386
00:19:17,623 --> 00:19:18,924
just in case there's
an emergency, huh?
387
00:19:19,024 --> 00:19:21,026
Hell, no!
388
00:19:21,126 --> 00:19:23,462
I'm gonna use what I know,
I'm gonna kick some butt!
389
00:19:25,397 --> 00:19:29,735
I said "No tomato on my burger."
390
00:19:35,140 --> 00:19:38,243
I don't think he'll be
making that mistake again.
391
00:19:40,145 --> 00:19:41,647
It's like my grandma.
392
00:19:41,747 --> 00:19:45,817
She made me
these oatmeal cookies.
393
00:19:45,918 --> 00:19:47,920
I must've told Grandma
a hundred times.
394
00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:51,823
"Grandma, I don't like
oatmeal cookies."
395
00:19:55,827 --> 00:19:57,429
I don't think
Granny's gonna be making
396
00:19:57,529 --> 00:20:00,098
that mistake again,
right, Granny?
397
00:20:05,604 --> 00:20:07,072
Hey, they're almost
ready for you.
398
00:20:07,172 --> 00:20:09,174
I just tried the paper again.
He's still not there.
399
00:20:09,274 --> 00:20:10,409
I'm sure he's fine.
400
00:20:10,509 --> 00:20:12,945
At work, he seemed distant.
401
00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:14,947
Now he's not where
he said he would be.
402
00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:16,582
It's not his well-being
I'm worried about.
403
00:20:16,682 --> 00:20:18,984
Kel, you're not thinking...
404
00:20:19,084 --> 00:20:20,986
I don't know.
405
00:20:21,086 --> 00:20:22,454
It just seems like
he's hiding something.
406
00:20:22,554 --> 00:20:24,856
Hiding something
or are you talking about
407
00:20:24,957 --> 00:20:26,191
hiding someone?
408
00:20:26,291 --> 00:20:27,192
Am I crazy?
409
00:20:28,860 --> 00:20:30,829
You look absolutely stunning.
410
00:20:30,929 --> 00:20:32,331
You two are
completely in love,
411
00:20:32,431 --> 00:20:33,799
it makes no sense.
412
00:20:33,899 --> 00:20:35,634
I hope you're right.
413
00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:37,035
I'm sure wherever
Brandon is,
414
00:20:37,135 --> 00:20:38,604
he has a perfectly
good explanation, okay?
415
00:20:38,704 --> 00:20:39,671
Now, go have some
fun with this.
416
00:20:41,106 --> 00:20:42,841
Okay.
417
00:20:52,918 --> 00:20:54,119
I had a really great time.
418
00:20:54,219 --> 00:20:56,488
So did I.
419
00:20:56,588 --> 00:20:58,290
Shopping on Melrose,
420
00:20:58,390 --> 00:21:00,959
Botanical Gardens
in Pasadena,
421
00:21:01,059 --> 00:21:02,160
sunset on the beach.
422
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:05,063
All of which were your idea.
423
00:21:05,163 --> 00:21:08,166
Yeah, but I didn't exactly
have to twist your arm.
424
00:21:08,267 --> 00:21:10,168
No.
425
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:13,505
So, would you say that our
business to pleasure ratio
426
00:21:13,605 --> 00:21:15,607
is still 50/50?
427
00:21:20,312 --> 00:21:23,148
Maybe 70/30.
428
00:21:23,248 --> 00:21:26,184
Business?
429
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:31,290
Or pleasure?
430
00:21:37,996 --> 00:21:41,166
Sometimes business
can be a pleasure.
431
00:21:41,266 --> 00:21:43,201
Do you wanna come in?
432
00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:51,743
I do, but I'm not going to.
433
00:21:53,979 --> 00:21:56,715
Not tonight, anyway.
434
00:22:18,970 --> 00:22:20,672
What is this?
435
00:22:20,772 --> 00:22:22,841
Belgian waffles, your favorite.
436
00:22:24,376 --> 00:22:26,545
Wow, what's
the occasion?
437
00:22:26,645 --> 00:22:27,846
No occasion,
I just felt like it.
438
00:22:27,946 --> 00:22:30,449
I tried to stay up
and wait up for you last night,
439
00:22:30,549 --> 00:22:32,484
but I was tired--
I went to bed around 1:00.
440
00:22:32,584 --> 00:22:34,019
What time did
you finally get home?
441
00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:36,955
Uh, 2:30,
something like that.
442
00:22:37,055 --> 00:22:39,124
2:30? Well, you deserve
breakfast in bed.
443
00:22:39,224 --> 00:22:41,159
I hope that means
it went well.
444
00:22:41,259 --> 00:22:42,894
Yeah. Yeah, it was great.
445
00:22:42,994 --> 00:22:45,864
Except for all the calls I made
trying to find you.
446
00:22:45,964 --> 00:22:47,733
For someone so
swamped at work,
447
00:22:47,833 --> 00:22:49,801
you sure left the office early.
448
00:22:49,901 --> 00:22:53,472
Yeah, well, right after you
left, I got a lead on a story.
449
00:22:53,572 --> 00:22:55,073
I was chasing it down all day.
450
00:22:55,173 --> 00:22:56,808
Mm.
451
00:22:56,908 --> 00:22:58,276
Come on,
eat before it gets cold.
452
00:23:01,446 --> 00:23:03,081
What was the story about?
453
00:23:03,181 --> 00:23:05,183
What?
454
00:23:05,283 --> 00:23:07,419
What was the story about?
455
00:23:07,519 --> 00:23:11,156
Oh, it was about a...
civil court judge downtown
456
00:23:11,256 --> 00:23:13,191
who's allegedly
involved in some cult.
457
00:23:14,860 --> 00:23:15,927
Why?
458
00:23:16,027 --> 00:23:17,896
I just...
459
00:23:17,996 --> 00:23:20,365
I couldn't get
ahold of you, and...
460
00:23:22,300 --> 00:23:24,069
I don't want to doubt you
Brandon-- I'm sorry.
461
00:23:24,169 --> 00:23:25,237
I just...
462
00:23:25,337 --> 00:23:27,539
had this weird feeling.
463
00:23:28,974 --> 00:23:30,475
It's okay.
464
00:23:32,811 --> 00:23:34,913
What do you say we get things
back on track, huh?
465
00:23:35,013 --> 00:23:37,783
We'll go see Steve's
comedy thing tonight at the After Dark,
466
00:23:37,883 --> 00:23:39,751
and then
after that we'll go out.
467
00:23:39,851 --> 00:23:41,052
What do you say?
468
00:23:41,153 --> 00:23:43,188
That sounds good.
469
00:23:46,792 --> 00:23:48,727
Hey, man, I want you to know,
470
00:23:48,827 --> 00:23:50,695
I really appreciate
what you did for me yesterday,
471
00:23:50,796 --> 00:23:52,798
but there's no sense
in getting involved, man.
472
00:23:52,898 --> 00:23:55,066
It's been going on a while,
and it's really not
473
00:23:55,167 --> 00:23:56,301
that big of a deal.
474
00:23:56,401 --> 00:23:58,270
Has anyone ever
said anything?
475
00:23:58,370 --> 00:23:59,304
Like... the owner?
476
00:23:59,404 --> 00:24:01,573
What, Vince?
477
00:24:01,673 --> 00:24:04,976
Yeah, Vince is too busy
dropping acid and chasing spaceships in the desert.
478
00:24:05,076 --> 00:24:07,379
No. You don't have
479
00:24:07,479 --> 00:24:09,581
to worry about those guys,
really, they're not a problem.
480
00:24:09,681 --> 00:24:12,551
I don't know, man,
you shouldn't have to deal with that crap.
481
00:24:12,651 --> 00:24:13,752
I know, but...
482
00:24:13,852 --> 00:24:15,620
those guys aren't
the problem.
483
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:17,122
It's my parents--
484
00:24:17,222 --> 00:24:19,090
they're the ones
I can't live with.
485
00:24:19,191 --> 00:24:21,193
Or actually, they won't
let me live with them.
486
00:24:23,862 --> 00:24:26,231
Don't worry about it, man,
they'll come around.
487
00:24:26,331 --> 00:24:28,099
My dad kicked me out, man.
488
00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:30,469
He said I've
destroyed his life.
489
00:24:30,569 --> 00:24:32,170
I've destroyed his life,
490
00:24:32,270 --> 00:24:35,407
and I'm the one living in
the car wash for the past month.
491
00:24:35,507 --> 00:24:38,443
What about your mom?
Didn't she...
492
00:24:38,543 --> 00:24:40,011
She didn't do anything.
493
00:24:40,111 --> 00:24:42,013
She just stood there.
494
00:24:42,113 --> 00:24:44,249
Look...
495
00:24:44,349 --> 00:24:47,586
I can deal with being gay.
496
00:24:47,686 --> 00:24:50,622
I just... can't deal
with my family not accepting me
497
00:24:50,722 --> 00:24:51,957
for who I am.
498
00:25:07,606 --> 00:25:09,307
What have we got here?
499
00:25:09,407 --> 00:25:10,876
Oh, those are just
some pictures from
500
00:25:10,976 --> 00:25:12,544
a shoot I did.
Do you mind?
501
00:25:12,644 --> 00:25:14,613
Actually...
Come on, you wouldn't have brought them to work
502
00:25:14,713 --> 00:25:16,147
it you didn't want
someone to see.
503
00:25:16,248 --> 00:25:17,782
Well, they were
in my purse.
504
00:25:17,883 --> 00:25:20,519
Hold it, hold it,
just a few more. I would like them back.
505
00:25:20,619 --> 00:25:22,354
Well, now, that's
an expression I've never seen
506
00:25:22,454 --> 00:25:25,123
on your face before.
I said I would like them back.
507
00:25:25,223 --> 00:25:27,359
Relax, Kelly-- I always knew
there was another side to you.
508
00:25:27,459 --> 00:25:29,294
Too bad you're wasting
all that beauty
509
00:25:29,394 --> 00:25:31,463
on a younger,
less experienced man.
510
00:25:31,563 --> 00:25:33,198
Mr. Evans?
511
00:25:43,675 --> 00:25:45,176
Well, looks like
my little idea
512
00:25:45,277 --> 00:25:47,846
for theme nights is gonna
work out pretty well.
513
00:25:47,946 --> 00:25:49,347
Your idea?
514
00:25:49,447 --> 00:25:51,516
All right, Noah, who
cares-- it's our idea.
515
00:25:51,616 --> 00:25:53,685
This is great-- I mean,
look at the place.
516
00:25:53,785 --> 00:25:54,986
We did it!
517
00:25:55,086 --> 00:25:57,088
Yeah, Val, we're
a great team, huh?
518
00:25:57,188 --> 00:25:58,623
Hmm. Oh!
519
00:26:00,692 --> 00:26:02,661
Hey. Mm!
520
00:26:07,265 --> 00:26:10,068
It didn't just go well--
Annika wants you to work on her campaign full-time.
521
00:26:10,168 --> 00:26:11,703
She did not.
522
00:26:11,803 --> 00:26:12,837
She did.
523
00:26:12,938 --> 00:26:14,839
Wow, that would be
a great opportunity.
524
00:26:14,940 --> 00:26:17,576
But I'm really gonna
have to give it some thought, you know?
525
00:26:17,676 --> 00:26:19,377
What'd you tell her?
526
00:26:19,477 --> 00:26:21,246
Donna?
527
00:26:22,547 --> 00:26:23,648
Oh.
528
00:26:25,951 --> 00:26:29,287
Sorry. I just wish I knew
what he was thinking, you know?
529
00:26:29,387 --> 00:26:31,523
Donna, the guy is
crazy about you.
530
00:26:31,623 --> 00:26:33,525
I mean, he bought
a $300,000 boat
531
00:26:33,625 --> 00:26:35,026
just to prove himself
to your mother.
532
00:26:35,126 --> 00:26:37,896
They were selling it,
and he needed a place to live.
533
00:26:37,996 --> 00:26:41,766
I'm sorry, you should have
seen the look on her face.
534
00:26:41,866 --> 00:26:43,768
Go talk to him.
535
00:26:43,868 --> 00:26:45,270
Okay.
536
00:26:48,573 --> 00:26:51,242
Tonight's going great--
I'm so proud of you.
537
00:26:51,343 --> 00:26:53,078
It's not bad, huh?
538
00:26:53,178 --> 00:26:56,715
What do you think
those two are trying to prove over there, huh?
539
00:26:58,817 --> 00:27:00,285
I don't know.
540
00:27:00,385 --> 00:27:02,120
It bothers you, doesn't it?
541
00:27:02,220 --> 00:27:03,455
Seeing her
with someone else?
542
00:27:03,555 --> 00:27:05,323
Does it bother you
seeing him with someone else?
543
00:27:05,423 --> 00:27:08,426
It's not good to answer
that question with a question.
544
00:27:08,526 --> 00:27:10,028
It seems to me like
545
00:27:10,128 --> 00:27:12,130
I'm not the only one
avoiding an answer here.
546
00:27:14,099 --> 00:27:15,700
Here you go, my lady.
547
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:17,335
Thanks.
548
00:27:18,870 --> 00:27:20,338
What's up?
549
00:27:22,574 --> 00:27:25,276
Dr. Monahan's been making
these comments again.
550
00:27:25,377 --> 00:27:29,280
Last you mentioned it, you
said you'd overreacted.
551
00:27:29,381 --> 00:27:32,317
I thought I had, but...
lately it's gotten worse.
552
00:27:32,417 --> 00:27:34,653
Sexual?
553
00:27:34,753 --> 00:27:36,321
Yeah.
554
00:27:36,421 --> 00:27:37,889
How much worse?
555
00:27:37,989 --> 00:27:39,524
Mm, it's nothing terrible.
556
00:27:39,624 --> 00:27:42,394
It's just I don't know
how to deal with it, you know?
557
00:27:42,494 --> 00:27:44,295
You got to call
him on it, Kel.
558
00:27:44,396 --> 00:27:45,830
You think I should report him?
559
00:27:45,930 --> 00:27:48,900
No, I think you should call him
on his behavior first,
560
00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:51,803
and then if it continues,
then, yeah, I think
561
00:27:51,903 --> 00:27:53,538
you should file
a grievance.
562
00:27:53,638 --> 00:27:55,740
I can't believe this guy.
563
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:59,010
You know what, let's not
let it ruin our night, okay?
564
00:27:59,110 --> 00:28:00,745
It's not worth it.
565
00:28:00,845 --> 00:28:02,547
You'll talk to him?
566
00:28:02,647 --> 00:28:05,884
Yes. I promise,
first thing tomorrow.
567
00:28:05,984 --> 00:28:08,987
Okay.
568
00:28:09,087 --> 00:28:12,157
Hey, I'm sorry,
I don't mean to break up the party or anything,
569
00:28:12,257 --> 00:28:14,759
but don't you think we should go over
our introductions? Yeah.
570
00:28:14,859 --> 00:28:17,395
I'll be back in
one minute, okay? Okay.
571
00:28:20,365 --> 00:28:22,000
Donna, don't worry,
he'll be back.
572
00:28:22,100 --> 00:28:25,336
I know it kills you when
he's gone for even a minute.
573
00:28:25,437 --> 00:28:29,374
I never should've let you
back in the beach apartment.
574
00:28:29,474 --> 00:28:32,577
I'm sorry, am I cramping your style with Noah?
575
00:28:32,677 --> 00:28:35,513
No. Actually, you have
no effect whatsoever
576
00:28:35,613 --> 00:28:36,948
on my relationship
with Noah.
577
00:28:37,048 --> 00:28:38,917
Trust me on
that one, David.
578
00:28:39,017 --> 00:28:41,019
You know what, as long as
you're back in Valerie's bed,
579
00:28:41,119 --> 00:28:42,353
maybe you should
go live there.
580
00:28:43,988 --> 00:28:46,324
No problem.
Fine.
581
00:28:48,793 --> 00:28:50,562
Ooh, hey...
582
00:28:50,662 --> 00:28:52,397
Watch out.
Hey, hey!
583
00:28:52,497 --> 00:28:54,199
There they are,
right on time!
584
00:28:54,299 --> 00:28:55,800
What do you
say, Zach?
585
00:28:55,900 --> 00:28:57,469
Hi, Nat.
Hi. Thanks, Nat.
586
00:28:57,569 --> 00:28:59,471
You're an
absolute lifesaver.
587
00:28:59,571 --> 00:29:01,406
Okay, so, um,
I won't be long--
588
00:29:01,506 --> 00:29:03,308
15 minutes,
half hour, tops?
589
00:29:03,408 --> 00:29:05,376
No problem-- we're
open till midnight,
590
00:29:05,477 --> 00:29:08,213
and, you know,
they're not exactly breaking the doors down.
591
00:29:08,313 --> 00:29:10,448
Best behavior for Nat, right?
592
00:29:10,548 --> 00:29:11,916
Right.
Okay.
593
00:29:12,016 --> 00:29:13,084
One for the mom.
594
00:29:13,184 --> 00:29:14,452
Thank you.
595
00:29:16,888 --> 00:29:18,389
Hey, Steve, Steve, my man,
596
00:29:18,490 --> 00:29:20,225
you got to relax,
you got to relax.
597
00:29:20,325 --> 00:29:22,494
You're gonna be great.
No, I feel like I'm gonna throw up.
598
00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:24,295
Nah.
Listen, can I ask your opinion on something?
599
00:29:24,395 --> 00:29:26,297
Yeah, you bet, you bet--
I'm here for you, man.
600
00:29:26,397 --> 00:29:28,433
I am here for you.
You are why I'm here.
601
00:29:28,533 --> 00:29:29,667
Good, good, because,
quite frankly,
602
00:29:29,768 --> 00:29:31,102
I've got
these jokes...
603
00:29:31,202 --> 00:29:32,137
I got to go.
604
00:29:32,237 --> 00:29:33,004
What? What?
605
00:29:33,104 --> 00:29:34,506
Oh, great.
606
00:29:34,606 --> 00:29:37,142
Emma, what are
you doing here? Surprised?
607
00:29:37,242 --> 00:29:39,778
Steve asked me the other day
when I was at the paper.
608
00:29:39,878 --> 00:29:41,880
Mm.
609
00:29:45,717 --> 00:29:47,886
I'll be right back, okay?
610
00:29:49,521 --> 00:29:51,656
"Emma, this is Kelly,
my girlfriend."
611
00:29:51,756 --> 00:29:54,192
You must have overlooked
that one minor detail, huh?
612
00:29:54,292 --> 00:29:55,827
Hey, Emma.
Hi.
613
00:29:55,927 --> 00:29:57,762
They're about to start--
Steve's up first.
614
00:29:57,862 --> 00:30:00,632
Emma, we have a great
table over there, if you wanna join us.
615
00:30:00,732 --> 00:30:02,300
I'd love to.
Great.
616
00:30:17,615 --> 00:30:19,784
Could I have
your attention, please?
617
00:30:19,884 --> 00:30:22,420
Welcome to the After Dark's
Comedy Night.
618
00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:23,721
Thank you all
for coming tonight.
619
00:30:23,822 --> 00:30:24,956
Are you guys
in the mood to laugh?
620
00:30:25,056 --> 00:30:26,791
Yeah!
621
00:30:26,891 --> 00:30:28,793
So, uh, let's get the show on the road.
622
00:30:28,893 --> 00:30:31,529
Please have a huge warm
welcome for Steve Sanders!
623
00:30:34,465 --> 00:30:36,234
Break a leg.
624
00:30:40,138 --> 00:30:42,807
All right! All righty!
625
00:30:42,907 --> 00:30:44,776
How you doing?
How's everybody tonight, good?
626
00:30:44,876 --> 00:30:46,611
Yeah!
627
00:30:46,711 --> 00:30:48,246
That's great.
628
00:30:48,346 --> 00:30:50,582
You know, I'm taking
these self-defense classes.
629
00:30:50,682 --> 00:30:54,085
And after about ten weeks
at 50 bucks a pop,
630
00:30:54,185 --> 00:30:56,721
the instructor says to me,
"Steve, by the way,
631
00:30:56,821 --> 00:31:00,558
you only use this
in case you're attacked."
632
00:31:00,658 --> 00:31:02,594
Yeah, right, you only go
633
00:31:02,694 --> 00:31:04,963
to medical school just in case
there's an emergency, huh?
634
00:31:05,063 --> 00:31:06,931
Uh-uh, not me.
I'm gonna go out there
635
00:31:07,031 --> 00:31:08,800
and I am gonna kick some butt.
636
00:31:08,900 --> 00:31:10,602
It's, like,
637
00:31:10,702 --> 00:31:13,972
I said no tomato on my hamburger.
638
00:31:25,683 --> 00:31:28,620
My grandma...
639
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:31,589
she made these oatmeal cookies
for me, and I...
640
00:31:31,689 --> 00:31:36,961
and I told her, "Grandma,
I don't like oatmeal cookies."
641
00:31:48,973 --> 00:31:50,708
Um...
642
00:31:50,808 --> 00:31:54,479
did you ever notice that
when little kids get embarrassed
643
00:31:54,579 --> 00:31:56,781
they always lift up whatever
they have over there head?
644
00:31:56,881 --> 00:31:59,717
Like, little boys
will pick up their jackets,
645
00:31:59,817 --> 00:32:02,687
and little girls will lift their
dresses way up over their head.
646
00:32:04,455 --> 00:32:07,125
I don't think we ever should've
stopped this behavior as adults.
647
00:32:08,593 --> 00:32:09,961
Say you're a chick looking
648
00:32:10,061 --> 00:32:11,829
for a job,
you go into the interview,
649
00:32:11,930 --> 00:32:13,698
just lift the dress
up over your head
650
00:32:13,798 --> 00:32:16,834
and say, "I want this job,
I need this job."
651
00:32:16,935 --> 00:32:18,403
Yeah!
652
00:32:18,503 --> 00:32:20,038
It's just a theory.
653
00:32:20,138 --> 00:32:21,506
May not be true.
654
00:32:21,606 --> 00:32:24,309
But don't blame me if it works.
655
00:32:24,409 --> 00:32:27,245
I was in New York City recently.
656
00:32:27,345 --> 00:32:29,914
Man, the cops
sure are different there.
657
00:32:30,014 --> 00:32:32,717
I mean, they don't care
how fast you drive in New York.
658
00:32:32,817 --> 00:32:34,686
You could be doing
50 miles an hour
659
00:32:34,786 --> 00:32:37,221
down 5th Avenue
with a beer between your legs,
660
00:32:37,322 --> 00:32:39,090
the seat belt
hanging out the window,
661
00:32:39,190 --> 00:32:41,693
running all these red lights.
662
00:32:41,793 --> 00:32:43,394
The cops sees that,
he's gonna say,
663
00:32:43,494 --> 00:32:46,030
"Bring me a doughnut
on your way back, would ya?"
664
00:32:47,999 --> 00:32:50,368
It's much different
here in California.
665
00:32:50,468 --> 00:32:53,504
I got stopped the other day
in Beverly Hills,
666
00:32:53,604 --> 00:32:58,076
and I said, "Wh-What's
the problem, Officer?"
667
00:32:58,176 --> 00:33:00,211
"Your right speaker's out."
668
00:33:05,717 --> 00:33:07,051
Whoo!
669
00:33:18,963 --> 00:33:20,732
Yes, can I help you?
670
00:33:20,832 --> 00:33:22,600
Uh, Mrs. Wester?
671
00:33:22,700 --> 00:33:23,735
Yes.
672
00:33:23,835 --> 00:33:24,969
You don't know me.
673
00:33:25,069 --> 00:33:27,205
My name is David.
I work with your son, Ben,
674
00:33:27,305 --> 00:33:28,206
at the car wash.
675
00:33:28,306 --> 00:33:29,374
Who is it honey?
676
00:33:29,474 --> 00:33:30,742
Is something wrong?
677
00:33:30,842 --> 00:33:33,444
Is Ben all right?
678
00:33:33,544 --> 00:33:34,712
Well, um...
679
00:33:34,812 --> 00:33:36,147
Who is this?
680
00:33:36,247 --> 00:33:37,982
He works with Ben
at a car wash.
681
00:33:38,082 --> 00:33:38,983
Something's happened
to Ben.
682
00:33:39,083 --> 00:33:40,551
No, it's nothing like that.
683
00:33:40,651 --> 00:33:42,286
He hasn't been in an accident
or anything.
684
00:33:42,387 --> 00:33:44,789
What specifically
are you here for?
685
00:33:44,889 --> 00:33:47,392
Well, um...
686
00:33:48,893 --> 00:33:51,562
I came tell you
that Ben needs....
687
00:33:51,662 --> 00:33:52,797
Benjamin needs
688
00:33:52,897 --> 00:33:54,265
a great many things,
I'm afraid.
689
00:33:54,365 --> 00:33:59,337
Most of which you might be
better suited to help him with.
690
00:33:59,437 --> 00:34:02,673
Hey, wait a sec.
Wait. Don't close the door.
691
00:34:02,774 --> 00:34:05,076
Look, I only, I only met Ben
yesterday, all right?
692
00:34:05,176 --> 00:34:06,077
I work with him,
693
00:34:06,177 --> 00:34:07,178
but that was long enough
694
00:34:07,278 --> 00:34:09,147
to realize that
he's in real trouble.
695
00:34:09,247 --> 00:34:11,349
I mean, he has
nowhere to go
696
00:34:11,449 --> 00:34:12,984
and no one to turn to.
697
00:34:13,084 --> 00:34:15,553
Your son is in pain.
He's in real pain.
698
00:34:19,424 --> 00:34:21,626
I don't have a son.
699
00:34:33,704 --> 00:34:35,173
Listen to this review.
700
00:34:35,273 --> 00:34:37,375
"Sanders has a presence
and an innate talent
701
00:34:37,475 --> 00:34:39,844
"for the one-liner
that you rarely see
702
00:34:39,944 --> 00:34:41,879
in the comedic talents
of today." Rave.
703
00:34:41,979 --> 00:34:43,281
Brandon, we can't
print that.
704
00:34:43,381 --> 00:34:45,016
Why not?
705
00:34:45,116 --> 00:34:46,851
Because it's embarrassing.
It's too much, Brandon.
706
00:34:46,951 --> 00:34:48,486
Besides this is our paper.
707
00:34:48,586 --> 00:34:49,954
We can't be objective with that.
708
00:34:50,054 --> 00:34:51,689
The guy's an independent
reviewer, Steve!
709
00:34:51,789 --> 00:34:52,857
He doesn't work for us.
710
00:34:52,957 --> 00:34:55,159
It's not right.
711
00:34:55,259 --> 00:34:57,061
Trust me. I'm the editor.
712
00:34:57,161 --> 00:34:58,463
And I'm the publisher.
713
00:34:58,563 --> 00:34:59,897
We're not printing that.
714
00:34:59,997 --> 00:35:02,166
Is there something going on here
you're not telling me?
715
00:35:02,266 --> 00:35:03,835
No, nothing.
716
00:35:13,811 --> 00:35:15,680
So it's true what they say
about really good comics.
717
00:35:15,780 --> 00:35:18,015
What do they say
about really good comics?
718
00:35:18,116 --> 00:35:19,851
They're extremely self-loathing.
719
00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:23,488
Hey, guys.
720
00:35:23,588 --> 00:35:25,323
Emma,
721
00:35:25,423 --> 00:35:27,892
we're just, uh, dealing
with a little situation here.
722
00:35:27,992 --> 00:35:29,660
20 minutes to press and
20 inches of blank space?
723
00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:31,262
That's a little situation?
724
00:35:31,362 --> 00:35:33,097
Brandon, what are
we gonna run?
725
00:35:33,197 --> 00:35:34,699
How about that?
726
00:35:37,435 --> 00:35:39,203
What's this?
727
00:35:39,303 --> 00:35:40,638
My column.
728
00:35:45,943 --> 00:35:48,079
Terri, would you give us
a minute?
729
00:35:48,179 --> 00:35:50,081
Sure.
730
00:35:53,618 --> 00:35:55,520
After our conversation
last night,
731
00:35:55,620 --> 00:35:58,122
I figured your days as
a columnist here were over.
732
00:35:58,222 --> 00:36:00,758
Well, I can separate
business from pleasure. Can you?
733
00:36:00,858 --> 00:36:02,860
What's it about?
734
00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:04,595
Something I've been
lucky enough
735
00:36:04,695 --> 00:36:06,197
to have very little
experience with
736
00:36:06,297 --> 00:36:10,101
till just recently:
two-timing men.
737
00:36:16,374 --> 00:36:17,275
Hi.
738
00:36:17,375 --> 00:36:18,543
Hi.
739
00:36:18,643 --> 00:36:20,244
How are we today, Kelly?
740
00:36:20,344 --> 00:36:22,947
Fine.
741
00:36:23,047 --> 00:36:27,485
No, actually I'm not.
742
00:36:27,585 --> 00:36:29,487
Oh, I'm sorry.
Anything I can do?
743
00:36:29,587 --> 00:36:31,055
As a matter of
fact, there is.
744
00:36:31,155 --> 00:36:35,226
While I find your work here
admirable,
745
00:36:35,326 --> 00:36:37,161
I have very little respect
for you as a person.
746
00:36:37,261 --> 00:36:40,131
I will not stand
for anymore references,
747
00:36:40,231 --> 00:36:42,767
however subtle, to my sexuality.
748
00:36:42,867 --> 00:36:45,336
I know that you're
having problems at home,
749
00:36:45,436 --> 00:36:47,238
but I don't think
that I'm the person
750
00:36:47,338 --> 00:36:48,906
you should be sharing
these things with.
751
00:36:49,006 --> 00:36:50,441
I find it very inappropriate,
752
00:36:50,541 --> 00:36:52,810
and it makes me
very uncomfortable.
753
00:36:57,081 --> 00:36:59,517
Are you accusing me
of sexual harassment?
754
00:36:59,617 --> 00:37:02,653
I'm just telling you...
755
00:37:02,753 --> 00:37:05,489
"Inappropriate"? What a joke.
756
00:37:05,590 --> 00:37:07,592
Do you have a problem
working with men,
757
00:37:07,692 --> 00:37:09,827
Miss Taylor?
758
00:37:09,927 --> 00:37:11,262
Since you are so easily offended
759
00:37:11,362 --> 00:37:13,998
by what is obviously
adult conversation,
760
00:37:14,098 --> 00:37:16,667
I suggest you go get a job
at a nursery school
761
00:37:16,767 --> 00:37:18,970
instead of a street clinic.
762
00:37:33,084 --> 00:37:35,286
Richard, uh, Belzer?
763
00:37:35,386 --> 00:37:36,320
Yeah.
764
00:37:36,420 --> 00:37:38,122
The guy from that
show Homicide?
765
00:37:38,222 --> 00:37:41,125
Yeah, he's a comedian, too.
766
00:37:41,225 --> 00:37:44,328
And I'm sure
a very funny one.
767
00:37:44,428 --> 00:37:46,797
But right now, we have
the house all to ourselves,
768
00:37:46,897 --> 00:37:48,633
and your success
to celebrate.
769
00:37:48,733 --> 00:37:50,868
Which is why
I think you should listen
770
00:37:50,968 --> 00:37:53,070
to this comedy CD again.
771
00:37:53,170 --> 00:37:54,272
Again? I've never
heard it before.
772
00:37:54,372 --> 00:37:57,375
Yeah, you did.
773
00:37:57,675 --> 00:37:59,844
No.
774
00:37:59,944 --> 00:38:00,878
No, I haven't.
775
00:38:00,978 --> 00:38:02,046
Uh, yeah, you have.
776
00:38:02,146 --> 00:38:06,384
I, uh, I did his act
on stage at the club.
777
00:38:07,485 --> 00:38:09,453
You did his act?
778
00:38:09,553 --> 00:38:12,790
Well, no, not at first.
779
00:38:12,890 --> 00:38:15,926
Just, you know, the parts where
people actually were laughing.
780
00:38:16,027 --> 00:38:18,362
You stole his jokes?
781
00:38:18,462 --> 00:38:20,264
Stole?
782
00:38:20,364 --> 00:38:21,632
No, I didn't steal.
783
00:38:21,732 --> 00:38:23,100
I-I borrowed.
784
00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:25,369
He can have his jokes back
whenever he wants them.
785
00:38:27,305 --> 00:38:28,439
Look, imagine
what it was like for me.
786
00:38:28,539 --> 00:38:30,107
I'm up on the stage
in the spotlight in front
787
00:38:30,207 --> 00:38:31,609
of all these people,
788
00:38:31,709 --> 00:38:35,212
and suddenly I realize that
I can't be funny on command.
789
00:38:35,313 --> 00:38:36,781
The only thing in my head
is Belzer's act,
790
00:38:36,881 --> 00:38:38,149
so I figure, "What the heck?"
791
00:38:38,249 --> 00:38:40,384
I can't believe you did this.
792
00:38:40,484 --> 00:38:42,253
Believe it.
793
00:38:42,353 --> 00:38:43,621
You know, when
794
00:38:43,721 --> 00:38:45,156
I-I was in college once,
795
00:38:45,256 --> 00:38:46,957
I ripped off
one of Brandon's term papers.
796
00:38:47,058 --> 00:38:48,592
Now that
797
00:38:48,693 --> 00:38:50,995
was the mother
of all screw-ups.
798
00:38:51,095 --> 00:38:52,463
This is just a little one.
799
00:38:52,563 --> 00:38:56,334
So you're kind of slow to learn,
I'd say.
800
00:38:56,434 --> 00:38:58,736
The evidence speaks for itself.
801
00:38:58,836 --> 00:39:02,840
I'm not just slow,
802
00:39:02,940 --> 00:39:04,508
sometimes I'm
downright dumb.
803
00:39:04,608 --> 00:39:08,479
I'm so stupid I actually once
had a crush on Ellen DeGeneres.
804
00:39:08,579 --> 00:39:10,247
I thought
escort services
805
00:39:10,348 --> 00:39:12,683
were for guys who needed dates.
806
00:39:12,783 --> 00:39:15,986
Nobody's that dumb.
807
00:39:16,087 --> 00:39:18,022
Oh, yeah, does this look like
the face of a member of Mensa?
808
00:39:18,122 --> 00:39:19,023
I don't think.
809
00:39:20,224 --> 00:39:21,826
You tell me the check's
in the mail,
810
00:39:21,926 --> 00:39:22,927
and I'm checking the mailbox
every day.
811
00:39:23,027 --> 00:39:26,030
Steve, look at me!
812
00:39:26,130 --> 00:39:27,365
What?
813
00:39:27,465 --> 00:39:29,166
Am I laughing?
814
00:39:29,266 --> 00:39:30,601
Have you made me
laugh?
815
00:39:30,701 --> 00:39:32,136
Is this a trick question?
816
00:39:32,236 --> 00:39:34,338
No.
817
00:39:34,438 --> 00:39:37,274
Look, you don't need Belzer.
818
00:39:37,375 --> 00:39:39,310
You really are funny
all by yourself.
819
00:39:39,410 --> 00:39:43,114
You know, I'm just dumb enough
to believe that.
820
00:39:51,889 --> 00:39:53,391
If we did this well
mid-week with comedy,
821
00:39:53,491 --> 00:39:55,493
can you imagine what the
weekends are gonna do?
822
00:39:55,593 --> 00:39:57,361
Easy boy. Any giddier
and people are gonna start
823
00:39:57,461 --> 00:39:58,662
thinking that you're
a trust-fund baby
824
00:39:58,763 --> 00:40:00,398
who's never made
a hard-earned dollar.
825
00:40:00,498 --> 00:40:02,032
And you're not happy
that we're doing well?
826
00:40:02,133 --> 00:40:04,235
I'm gonna take my ten percent
to the piggy bank.
827
00:40:04,335 --> 00:40:06,170
So what are you gonna do
with your share?
828
00:40:06,270 --> 00:40:08,005
Romantic vacation
with Donna
829
00:40:08,105 --> 00:40:09,173
or are you gonna spend
some quiet time
830
00:40:09,273 --> 00:40:10,174
at the beach apartment
now that
831
00:40:10,274 --> 00:40:11,142
David's not there?
832
00:40:12,810 --> 00:40:13,711
David moved out?
833
00:40:13,811 --> 00:40:15,646
She kicked him out again.
834
00:40:15,746 --> 00:40:17,348
Where's he gonna live?
835
00:40:17,448 --> 00:40:19,316
My place.
836
00:40:19,417 --> 00:40:21,318
There can't be many rooms
left over there.
837
00:40:21,419 --> 00:40:22,853
Oh, I'll squeeze him in.
838
00:40:24,321 --> 00:40:26,157
Speak of the devil.
839
00:40:26,257 --> 00:40:27,525
Hey, Donna.
840
00:40:27,625 --> 00:40:30,761
Hey. Sorry. Am I interrupting?
841
00:40:30,861 --> 00:40:32,830
Oh, don't be silly.
I'm late.
842
00:40:32,930 --> 00:40:34,098
I promised David
I would help him
843
00:40:34,198 --> 00:40:36,267
with him being
in transition and all.
844
00:40:36,367 --> 00:40:38,836
You guys want to be alone,
I'm sure. Bye.
845
00:40:40,438 --> 00:40:42,173
What is her deal?
846
00:40:42,273 --> 00:40:45,242
I don't know, but whatever
it is, it's her deal.
847
00:40:45,342 --> 00:40:47,011
So, I heard you asked
David to move out.
848
00:40:47,111 --> 00:40:49,013
Val tell you that?
849
00:40:49,113 --> 00:40:51,115
She might've
mentioned it, yeah.
850
00:40:51,215 --> 00:40:52,349
Why'd you do that?
851
00:40:52,450 --> 00:40:53,451
Why'd I do that?
852
00:40:53,551 --> 00:40:55,052
I thought you'd be happy
with the fact
853
00:40:55,152 --> 00:40:56,353
that I'm no longer
living with my ex.
854
00:40:56,454 --> 00:40:58,689
It's not that,
it's just, you know...
855
00:40:58,789 --> 00:41:00,090
What? More unhappy
about the fact
856
00:41:00,191 --> 00:41:01,725
that he's gonna be living
with your ex?
857
00:41:01,826 --> 00:41:03,961
We went out a few times.
She's not my ex okay?
858
00:41:04,061 --> 00:41:07,231
You still have
feelings for David.
859
00:41:07,331 --> 00:41:10,134
You guys went out for seven
years. That's history.
860
00:41:10,234 --> 00:41:12,770
Yeah, I do still care for David,
861
00:41:12,870 --> 00:41:14,738
I probably always will.
862
00:41:14,839 --> 00:41:16,474
But those feelings
don't stop me from moving
863
00:41:16,574 --> 00:41:17,541
into another relationship.
864
00:41:17,641 --> 00:41:19,710
Hey,
865
00:41:19,810 --> 00:41:21,111
do you feel the same way?
866
00:41:22,213 --> 00:41:23,781
I mean, I guess
that's what
867
00:41:23,881 --> 00:41:26,717
I was asking last night,
'cause I need to know.
868
00:41:30,354 --> 00:41:32,189
Let me see if I can answer
that question.
869
00:41:41,198 --> 00:41:43,634
I decided not to take the modeling job.
870
00:41:43,734 --> 00:41:46,770
This whole ordeal with Monahan
has really made me realize
871
00:41:46,871 --> 00:41:49,440
that I don't ever want
to trade on my looks.
872
00:41:49,540 --> 00:41:52,076
I'm proud of the way
you stood up to him, Kel.
873
00:41:52,176 --> 00:41:54,645
Me, too. I don't think
it's gonna do any good,
874
00:41:54,745 --> 00:41:56,380
but I'm glad I did it.
875
00:42:00,217 --> 00:42:01,485
What's that?
876
00:42:01,585 --> 00:42:03,454
It's a copy
of Emma's column.
877
00:42:03,554 --> 00:42:06,023
How did you get it?
878
00:42:06,123 --> 00:42:07,191
Steve brought it home.
879
00:42:07,291 --> 00:42:09,493
This one is even better
than the last.
880
00:42:09,593 --> 00:42:11,495
You want to know what
I found interesting?
881
00:42:11,595 --> 00:42:12,530
What?
882
00:42:12,630 --> 00:42:13,797
Even after the girl
883
00:42:14,098 --> 00:42:15,666
that Emma's writing
about found out
884
00:42:15,766 --> 00:42:17,768
that the guy she fell for
had a girlfriend,
885
00:42:17,868 --> 00:42:19,336
she still wanted
to pursue him.
886
00:42:19,436 --> 00:42:23,707
That makes her kind of a home
wrecker, don't you think?
887
00:42:23,807 --> 00:42:25,175
I don't know.
888
00:42:25,276 --> 00:42:27,511
Maybe she and
this guy really have something.
889
00:42:27,611 --> 00:42:29,947
Something that he and his
girlfriend don't have,
890
00:42:30,047 --> 00:42:31,615
and maybe they shouldn't be
together.
891
00:42:31,715 --> 00:42:34,618
How do you suppose the guy
and his girlfriend know
892
00:42:34,718 --> 00:42:36,620
if they actually
have something or not?
893
00:42:36,720 --> 00:42:38,322
How do you know?
894
00:42:38,422 --> 00:42:41,692
I don't know. I just know.
895
00:42:41,792 --> 00:42:43,994
Well, there's your answer.
896
00:42:54,138 --> 00:42:55,306
Hello?
897
00:42:55,406 --> 00:42:57,308
I miss you.
898
00:43:00,411 --> 00:43:01,645
Hello?
899
00:43:01,745 --> 00:43:04,415
Kelly's there, isn't she?
900
00:43:04,515 --> 00:43:05,649
Lying right next to you?
901
00:43:05,749 --> 00:43:07,718
Hello?
902
00:43:07,818 --> 00:43:09,486
Right where I want to be.
903
00:43:15,459 --> 00:43:16,427
Crank?
904
00:43:16,527 --> 00:43:18,295
Must've been.
63919
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