Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,220 --> 00:00:08,553
I understand
we all have busy lives.
2
00:00:08,637 --> 00:00:12,053
Sometimes you miss an episode
for the little things in life,
3
00:00:12,136 --> 00:00:13,303
like a heart transplant
4
00:00:13,387 --> 00:00:16,011
or a multiple murder
in the family,
5
00:00:16,095 --> 00:00:18,595
but there should
be no damn reason on Earth
6
00:00:18,679 --> 00:00:20,679
that I have to tell you
what you missed last week
7
00:00:20,762 --> 00:00:22,011
on "Shameless."
8
00:00:22,095 --> 00:00:24,011
Hmm.
9
00:00:24,095 --> 00:00:25,970
[Ian] Do we really need
a piece of paper
10
00:00:26,053 --> 00:00:27,720
from the state
to say that I'm committed?
11
00:00:27,804 --> 00:00:28,845
I'm committed.
12
00:00:28,929 --> 00:00:30,553
Maybe one day I will want
to get married,
13
00:00:30,637 --> 00:00:32,929
but in the meantime,
I love you.
14
00:00:33,011 --> 00:00:34,637
I'm not saying never.
15
00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:36,804
No, you're saying
you don't love me enough now.
16
00:00:36,887 --> 00:00:40,637
♪ rock music ♪
17
00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:45,595
♪♪♪
18
00:00:45,679 --> 00:00:47,470
[zipper opens]
19
00:00:47,553 --> 00:00:50,095
[urinating]
20
00:00:50,845 --> 00:00:52,637
Can I impose on you
to do me a favor?
21
00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:54,679
- Of course. What?
- Great.
22
00:00:54,762 --> 00:00:56,845
Um, can you pick Julia up
after school?
23
00:00:56,929 --> 00:00:59,303
- Julia?
- My kid.
24
00:00:59,387 --> 00:01:02,011
I decided you might just
be interesting after all.
25
00:01:02,095 --> 00:01:05,512
♪♪♪
26
00:01:05,595 --> 00:01:07,345
Oh, I'm sorry.
27
00:01:07,428 --> 00:01:09,053
That was not cool.
[chuckles]
28
00:01:09,136 --> 00:01:10,553
♪♪♪
29
00:01:10,637 --> 00:01:11,553
[laughs]
30
00:01:11,637 --> 00:01:14,220
♪♪♪
31
00:01:14,303 --> 00:01:16,804
Let's just say you are
overqualified for this group.
32
00:01:16,887 --> 00:01:19,220
I think I've got somewhere
better suited for your talent.
33
00:01:19,303 --> 00:01:20,345
The academy, sir?
34
00:01:20,428 --> 00:01:22,553
How do you feel about trash?
35
00:01:22,637 --> 00:01:26,136
Now that you remember exactly
how you destroyed Kyle's life,
36
00:01:26,220 --> 00:01:28,095
I can get on with
making you pay for it.
37
00:01:28,178 --> 00:01:30,178
Filling me full of Oxy?
38
00:01:30,261 --> 00:01:33,178
Mm, I need you
in an opioid coma,
39
00:01:33,261 --> 00:01:35,845
but not, you know, dead.
40
00:01:35,970 --> 00:01:40,970
♪♪♪
41
00:01:56,470 --> 00:01:59,387
♪ rock music ♪
42
00:01:59,470 --> 00:02:03,387
♪♪♪
43
00:02:03,470 --> 00:02:06,553
♪ Think of all
the luck you got ♪
44
00:02:06,637 --> 00:02:09,804
♪ Know that
it's not for naught ♪
45
00:02:09,887 --> 00:02:12,887
♪ You were beaming
once before ♪
46
00:02:12,970 --> 00:02:17,220
♪ But it's not like that
anymore ♪
47
00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:20,679
♪ What is this downside ♪
48
00:02:20,762 --> 00:02:24,053
♪ That you speak of? ♪
49
00:02:24,136 --> 00:02:26,178
♪ What is this feeling ♪
50
00:02:26,261 --> 00:02:30,845
♪ You're so sure of? ♪
51
00:02:30,929 --> 00:02:35,929
♪♪♪
52
00:02:37,679 --> 00:02:41,011
♪ Round up
the friends you got ♪
53
00:02:41,095 --> 00:02:44,095
♪ Know that
they're not for naught ♪
54
00:02:44,178 --> 00:02:47,387
♪ You were willing
once before ♪
55
00:02:47,470 --> 00:02:51,762
♪ But it's not like that
anymore ♪
56
00:02:51,845 --> 00:02:55,095
♪ What is this downside ♪
57
00:02:55,178 --> 00:02:58,637
♪ That you speak of? ♪
58
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:00,512
♪ What is this feeling ♪
59
00:03:00,595 --> 00:03:04,470
♪ You're so sure of? ♪
60
00:03:06,095 --> 00:03:09,011
[siren wails]
61
00:03:09,095 --> 00:03:12,053
♪ laidback music ♪
62
00:03:12,136 --> 00:03:13,970
♪♪♪
63
00:03:14,053 --> 00:03:17,303
[car doors open]
64
00:03:17,387 --> 00:03:21,887
♪♪♪
65
00:03:25,637 --> 00:03:27,178
[knocking on window]
66
00:03:27,261 --> 00:03:29,512
Sir, step out
of the car.
67
00:03:29,595 --> 00:03:32,762
♪♪♪
68
00:03:32,845 --> 00:03:34,053
[thud]
69
00:03:34,136 --> 00:03:36,762
[phone chiming]
70
00:03:36,845 --> 00:03:39,887
[baby crying]
71
00:03:42,178 --> 00:03:44,720
[groans]
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
72
00:03:44,804 --> 00:03:46,637
- [phone chimes]
- Hey.
73
00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:48,512
Tami.
74
00:03:48,595 --> 00:03:51,136
Tam. Tami, Tami, here,
it's your phone.
75
00:03:51,220 --> 00:03:52,178
[phone chiming]
76
00:03:52,261 --> 00:03:54,428
Hey. Hey.
77
00:03:54,512 --> 00:03:55,720
Hey, handsome.
78
00:03:55,804 --> 00:03:57,387
Oh, good morning.
79
00:03:57,470 --> 00:03:59,512
Ah.
[sniffs]
80
00:03:59,595 --> 00:04:00,845
What's the emergency?
81
00:04:00,929 --> 00:04:02,053
Salon run out
of hair dye?
82
00:04:02,136 --> 00:04:06,011
No, it's my family
group text.
83
00:04:06,095 --> 00:04:08,220
Dad wants us home
for a family meeting.
84
00:04:08,303 --> 00:04:09,845
"Us," like you
and your sisters?
85
00:04:09,929 --> 00:04:12,762
"Us," like you, too.
86
00:04:12,845 --> 00:04:15,303
You're a baby daddy,
so you're a Tamietti now.
87
00:04:15,387 --> 00:04:16,929
Oh.
88
00:04:17,011 --> 00:04:18,929
You're going.
89
00:04:21,178 --> 00:04:23,136
[quietly]
Do-do-do-do-do-do.
90
00:04:26,053 --> 00:04:27,512
Here you go.
91
00:04:27,595 --> 00:04:28,637
- An omelet with...
- Oh.
92
00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:30,428
Asparagus, mushrooms,
93
00:04:30,512 --> 00:04:31,887
and cheese from a goat.
94
00:04:31,970 --> 00:04:34,261
Sounds weird, but it's
actually pretty good.
95
00:04:34,345 --> 00:04:36,011
You're amazing.
96
00:04:36,095 --> 00:04:37,720
[scoffs]
It's just an omelet.
97
00:04:37,804 --> 00:04:39,970
It's beautiful.
98
00:04:40,053 --> 00:04:41,595
You're beautiful.
99
00:04:43,178 --> 00:04:44,887
I love having you around.
100
00:04:44,970 --> 00:04:47,553
I love being around.
101
00:04:47,637 --> 00:04:48,804
Gonna hop in the shower.
102
00:04:48,887 --> 00:04:50,220
Sounds good, honey.
103
00:04:50,303 --> 00:04:53,220
♪ devious music ♪
104
00:04:53,303 --> 00:04:54,387
♪♪♪
105
00:04:54,470 --> 00:04:55,887
Mmm.
106
00:04:55,970 --> 00:04:58,720
♪♪♪
107
00:04:58,804 --> 00:05:00,720
Uh, I'm gonna go
call home real quick,
108
00:05:00,804 --> 00:05:01,679
just to check on Franny.
109
00:05:01,762 --> 00:05:03,136
- Okay.
- Be right back.
110
00:05:03,220 --> 00:05:04,136
Okay.
111
00:05:04,220 --> 00:05:09,178
♪♪♪
112
00:05:21,345 --> 00:05:22,512
Jesus Christ.
113
00:05:22,595 --> 00:05:24,470
You're never gonna fix
the fucking thing, Byron.
114
00:05:24,553 --> 00:05:27,470
No one that rides a Vespa
can fix anything.
115
00:05:27,553 --> 00:05:30,261
Something happen to your
little bike thingy?
116
00:05:30,345 --> 00:05:31,387
Yeah.
117
00:05:31,470 --> 00:05:32,720
It's a Vespa, and...
118
00:05:32,804 --> 00:05:34,428
it stopped working
all of a sudden.
119
00:05:34,512 --> 00:05:35,512
Oh, weird.
120
00:05:35,595 --> 00:05:36,720
What the hell
are you doing here?
121
00:05:36,804 --> 00:05:38,136
I came to drop off
some of the stuff
122
00:05:38,220 --> 00:05:40,053
you left at my place.
123
00:05:40,136 --> 00:05:41,220
That it?
124
00:05:41,303 --> 00:05:42,679
And I was hoping
that we could talk.
125
00:05:43,762 --> 00:05:44,929
In private.
126
00:05:45,011 --> 00:05:46,512
You know, anything
you got to say to me,
127
00:05:46,595 --> 00:05:50,053
you can say in front of the...
love of my life, Byron.
128
00:05:53,011 --> 00:05:53,887
Mickey.
129
00:05:56,345 --> 00:05:57,387
Okay.
130
00:05:58,970 --> 00:06:00,720
- It was a mistake coming.
- Yeah.
131
00:06:02,970 --> 00:06:04,220
Hey, Ian,
132
00:06:04,303 --> 00:06:06,387
you want to come check out
a show tomorrow?
133
00:06:06,470 --> 00:06:07,637
Jesus Christ.
134
00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:09,804
Read the fucking room, Byron.
135
00:06:09,887 --> 00:06:12,011
- Show?
- Yeah.
136
00:06:12,095 --> 00:06:14,470
It's the Imperial Mammoth.
137
00:06:14,553 --> 00:06:15,887
I don't know if you've
heard about them.
138
00:06:15,970 --> 00:06:18,637
They're--they're, like,
my favorite band right now.
139
00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:21,303
Wait. Wait, yeah, yeah.
140
00:06:21,387 --> 00:06:23,887
They're the, uh,
the hipster shit
141
00:06:23,970 --> 00:06:26,303
with the suspenders
and the--the harp
142
00:06:26,387 --> 00:06:27,804
and all that, huh?
143
00:06:27,887 --> 00:06:29,220
Yeah, you're going to that?
144
00:06:29,303 --> 00:06:31,428
[Byron] I can get you
on the list, too.
145
00:06:31,512 --> 00:06:33,595
I mean, I don't know if you
need a plus-one or whatever--
146
00:06:33,679 --> 00:06:35,303
Nah, no.
He don't need a plus-one.
147
00:06:35,387 --> 00:06:38,095
Trust me, he's got a lot
of, uh, what'd you say,
148
00:06:38,178 --> 00:06:39,804
"personal work"
you needed to do
149
00:06:39,887 --> 00:06:42,428
before you'd be ready
to play the field?
150
00:06:43,428 --> 00:06:45,095
No. No.
151
00:06:45,178 --> 00:06:48,470
Uh, actually,
152
00:06:48,553 --> 00:06:50,261
I just took a page
out of your playbook
153
00:06:50,345 --> 00:06:52,595
and attached myself to
the first swinging dick I saw.
154
00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:54,804
We barely know each other,
but, pfft...
155
00:06:54,887 --> 00:06:57,053
man, it has been
a fairy tale so far.
156
00:06:57,136 --> 00:06:58,679
It's actually
why I came here
157
00:06:58,762 --> 00:06:59,845
is, uh...
158
00:06:59,929 --> 00:07:01,303
Looks like we both moved on,
159
00:07:01,387 --> 00:07:03,845
so no reason for things
to be awkward, right?
160
00:07:03,929 --> 00:07:06,261
Congrats.
161
00:07:06,345 --> 00:07:08,053
Yeah, it all happened
so fast,
162
00:07:08,136 --> 00:07:10,595
but when you know,
you know.
163
00:07:10,679 --> 00:07:11,637
Right?
164
00:07:15,804 --> 00:07:19,387
[speaking Spanish]
165
00:07:19,470 --> 00:07:20,720
Liam Gallagher.
166
00:07:20,804 --> 00:07:23,804
[indistinct chatter]
167
00:07:26,178 --> 00:07:28,095
- Sit down.
- [door closes]
168
00:07:31,720 --> 00:07:33,387
[sighs]
169
00:07:33,470 --> 00:07:36,053
We don't have current proof
of residency on file for you.
170
00:07:36,136 --> 00:07:37,720
- So?
- So...
171
00:07:37,804 --> 00:07:39,011
how are we supposed to know
you ain't committing fraud
172
00:07:39,095 --> 00:07:40,303
so you can go to this school?
173
00:07:40,387 --> 00:07:41,720
You think someone
would commit fraud
174
00:07:41,804 --> 00:07:43,303
to attend this shithole?
175
00:07:43,387 --> 00:07:45,553
My job is tied to how much
paperwork is completed
176
00:07:45,637 --> 00:07:47,053
and how many files are current,
177
00:07:47,136 --> 00:07:49,053
so if your dad,
Francis Gallagher,
178
00:07:49,136 --> 00:07:51,470
could just bring us a copy
of his valid state-issued ID.
179
00:07:51,553 --> 00:07:54,303
[scoffs] He doesn't have
a valid state ID.
180
00:07:54,387 --> 00:07:57,428
Okay, then copies of two
utility bills in his name.
181
00:07:57,512 --> 00:08:00,053
All right, then he's gonna have
to come in and sign this form
182
00:08:00,136 --> 00:08:01,637
attesting to his residence.
183
00:08:03,178 --> 00:08:05,053
If we don't get this, I'll
have to remove you from school
184
00:08:05,136 --> 00:08:07,220
while we investigate this
as a fraud case.
185
00:08:07,303 --> 00:08:09,595
A vacation from this school?
186
00:08:09,679 --> 00:08:11,136
What's the downside?
187
00:08:11,220 --> 00:08:12,804
Any student removed from school
188
00:08:12,887 --> 00:08:16,053
triggers
an automatic review by CPS.
189
00:08:16,136 --> 00:08:17,261
See the downside
of a month or two
190
00:08:17,345 --> 00:08:18,345
in a state-run group home?
191
00:08:18,428 --> 00:08:21,303
♪ upbeat rock music ♪
192
00:08:21,387 --> 00:08:26,679
♪♪♪
193
00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:35,887
- You Carl?
- Yeah.
194
00:08:35,970 --> 00:08:39,303
Where are your gloves?
Jesus, rookie.
195
00:08:39,387 --> 00:08:41,887
Think you can sling trash
without protection?
196
00:08:41,970 --> 00:08:43,470
You'll tear your hands
to shreds.
197
00:08:43,553 --> 00:08:46,887
Those are just loaners, though.
I want 'em back.
198
00:08:46,970 --> 00:08:48,970
What are you doing
on a garbage route, kid?
199
00:08:49,053 --> 00:08:51,011
How'd you get this job?
200
00:08:51,095 --> 00:08:52,220
Someone recommended me.
201
00:08:52,303 --> 00:08:53,053
Ah.
202
00:08:53,136 --> 00:08:55,053
Friends in high places, huh?
203
00:08:55,136 --> 00:08:56,804
So where do we start?
204
00:08:56,887 --> 00:08:57,970
With breakfast.
205
00:08:58,053 --> 00:08:59,679
[taps on truck]
206
00:08:59,762 --> 00:09:02,679
[engine revs]
207
00:09:07,136 --> 00:09:08,428
Okay, when you get home,
208
00:09:08,512 --> 00:09:10,095
here's what you're gonna
want to do.
209
00:09:10,178 --> 00:09:11,762
You're gonna want to do
the rice method.
210
00:09:11,845 --> 00:09:13,762
That's where you take
your entire foot
211
00:09:13,845 --> 00:09:17,512
and submerge it
into a bag of rice.
212
00:09:17,595 --> 00:09:19,887
That's not it.
RICE is an acronym.
213
00:09:19,970 --> 00:09:22,011
[laughs]
214
00:09:22,095 --> 00:09:24,679
No, it's not.
215
00:09:24,762 --> 00:09:26,011
What's an acronym?
216
00:09:26,095 --> 00:09:27,804
Rest, ice, compress, elevate.
217
00:09:27,887 --> 00:09:29,178
R-I-C-E.
218
00:09:29,261 --> 00:09:31,261
One of us is a trained
medical professional,
219
00:09:31,345 --> 00:09:33,178
and one of us fucked her
ankle up running through a park
220
00:09:33,261 --> 00:09:34,845
trying to catch a Pokémon
with her phone.
221
00:09:34,929 --> 00:09:36,720
I know who I'd trust
in this situation.
222
00:09:36,804 --> 00:09:41,053
That'll be $20 for the ankle
and $20 for the abortion.
223
00:09:41,136 --> 00:09:43,595
Thank you.
Here, let me help you out.
224
00:09:43,679 --> 00:09:45,679
Thank you. Come again.
225
00:09:48,428 --> 00:09:49,720
- Kev.
- Yeah?
226
00:09:49,804 --> 00:09:51,387
The girls made it
to the next round
227
00:09:51,470 --> 00:09:54,011
of the Eldridge Academy
application process.
228
00:09:54,095 --> 00:09:56,804
We're preapproved for a full
financial aid package
229
00:09:56,887 --> 00:09:59,595
if we get in, and they invited
us to the charity auction.
230
00:09:59,679 --> 00:10:01,553
That's a good sign,
right?
231
00:10:01,637 --> 00:10:03,762
Isn't it a little early
to talk about kindergarten?
232
00:10:03,845 --> 00:10:05,178
Not at all.
233
00:10:05,261 --> 00:10:07,679
It's super competitive,
and it's only a year away.
234
00:10:07,762 --> 00:10:09,762
Plus, I thought
you wanted us to apply.
235
00:10:09,845 --> 00:10:12,970
I did, but that's because
I thought we'd be rejected...
236
00:10:13,053 --> 00:10:15,178
so the school would
be the asshole and not me.
237
00:10:15,261 --> 00:10:17,845
V, wh--our girls--
238
00:10:17,929 --> 00:10:19,762
what if they don't fit in
at Eldridge?
239
00:10:19,845 --> 00:10:21,261
There's all those rich kids.
240
00:10:21,345 --> 00:10:22,470
It's diverse,
241
00:10:22,553 --> 00:10:24,261
politically progressive,
and safe.
242
00:10:24,345 --> 00:10:26,011
You want the girls going
to Coolidge?
243
00:10:26,095 --> 00:10:27,345
A second-grader got caught
244
00:10:27,428 --> 00:10:28,679
going through
the metal detector
245
00:10:28,762 --> 00:10:29,720
with a machete last week.
246
00:10:29,804 --> 00:10:31,011
A machete, Kev.
247
00:10:31,095 --> 00:10:33,553
Maybe he had dense foliage
to clear after school.
248
00:10:33,637 --> 00:10:35,387
We're getting the girls
into Eldridge.
249
00:10:35,470 --> 00:10:37,053
Okay. How?
250
00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:39,595
By being active,
reliable, and engaged.
251
00:10:39,679 --> 00:10:41,887
That means going to everything
they invite us to,
252
00:10:41,970 --> 00:10:44,053
like this auction.
253
00:10:44,136 --> 00:10:46,261
What the hell are we gonna buy
at an auction?
254
00:10:46,345 --> 00:10:47,762
We don't have to buy
anything.
255
00:10:47,845 --> 00:10:49,387
We just need to show up.
256
00:10:49,470 --> 00:10:51,637
I'll RSVP.
257
00:10:54,428 --> 00:10:57,011
That's not mine.
258
00:10:57,095 --> 00:10:59,178
Or that.
259
00:11:00,970 --> 00:11:02,512
Or that.
260
00:11:04,970 --> 00:11:06,804
That is definitely not mine.
261
00:11:06,887 --> 00:11:08,637
Oh, come on.
262
00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:11,303
Use your common sense, fellas.
263
00:11:11,387 --> 00:11:13,929
What could I even do
with all those drugs?
264
00:11:14,011 --> 00:11:16,095
I admit I have
a healthy appetite,
265
00:11:16,178 --> 00:11:18,053
but I'm only one man.
266
00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:19,512
My guess is you
were gonna sell 'em.
267
00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:20,762
Ask around.
268
00:11:20,845 --> 00:11:24,136
Everyone'll tell you,
I'm a user, not a dealer.
269
00:11:24,220 --> 00:11:26,261
None of this is mine.
270
00:11:26,345 --> 00:11:28,053
It's a setup.
271
00:11:28,136 --> 00:11:30,053
It's not even my car.
272
00:11:30,136 --> 00:11:31,136
You don't say.
273
00:11:31,220 --> 00:11:32,470
I-I do say.
274
00:11:32,553 --> 00:11:34,053
Already ran
the plates, bub.
275
00:11:34,136 --> 00:11:36,387
Car was reported stolen
four days ago.
276
00:11:38,387 --> 00:11:39,804
♪ dramatic music ♪
277
00:11:39,887 --> 00:11:41,053
[chuckles]
278
00:11:41,136 --> 00:11:43,762
♪♪♪
279
00:11:43,845 --> 00:11:47,470
Oh, you really
did a number on me, Faye.
280
00:11:47,553 --> 00:11:52,553
♪♪♪
281
00:11:55,053 --> 00:11:56,470
You want to give us
a hand here?
282
00:11:56,553 --> 00:11:57,804
Not really.
283
00:11:58,679 --> 00:12:00,470
Breakfast is served.
284
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,053
You guys eat
out of the garbage?
285
00:12:02,136 --> 00:12:05,345
Hey, these bagels
haven't been touched.
286
00:12:05,428 --> 00:12:07,345
End of the night,
they just throw out
287
00:12:07,428 --> 00:12:09,261
whatever they didn't sell.
288
00:12:10,553 --> 00:12:12,553
Yeah, I don't know about that.
289
00:12:12,637 --> 00:12:14,011
Eat.
290
00:12:15,178 --> 00:12:17,762
We're the top garbage crew
in the city, Carl.
291
00:12:17,845 --> 00:12:19,970
There's guys who worked
sanitation ten years,
292
00:12:20,053 --> 00:12:21,720
die to get onto this route,
293
00:12:21,804 --> 00:12:23,595
and you just show up
out of nowhere,
294
00:12:23,679 --> 00:12:25,512
actin' like your shit
don't stink,
295
00:12:25,595 --> 00:12:27,553
like you're too good
to eat a Dumpster bagel.
296
00:12:27,637 --> 00:12:30,345
Strikes me
as a little suspicious.
297
00:12:30,428 --> 00:12:31,595
Eat.
298
00:12:35,595 --> 00:12:38,011
Except cinnamon raisin.
Those go to the boss man.
299
00:12:40,428 --> 00:12:42,470
Jackpot.
300
00:12:42,553 --> 00:12:44,053
Low-fat garden veggie.
301
00:12:46,387 --> 00:12:48,387
[sniffs]
302
00:12:50,428 --> 00:12:51,762
[rock music playing
over speakers]
303
00:12:51,845 --> 00:12:55,220
Hey, man, so this, uh,
Tamietti family meeting thing?
304
00:12:55,303 --> 00:12:57,887
- Yeah, we got that text, too.
- Right.
305
00:12:57,970 --> 00:13:00,512
We don't actually have to--
to go, do we?
306
00:13:00,595 --> 00:13:02,387
We absolutely have to go.
307
00:13:02,470 --> 00:13:04,387
You got a kid
with a Tamietti.
308
00:13:04,470 --> 00:13:06,470
Comes with
certain expectations.
309
00:13:06,553 --> 00:13:09,428
I got a second one on the way,
so I'm, like, doubly obligated.
310
00:13:09,512 --> 00:13:10,762
And the pain of sitting
311
00:13:10,845 --> 00:13:12,512
through a family meeting
is nothing compared
312
00:13:12,595 --> 00:13:14,470
to the passive-aggressive
ball-busting you're gonna get
313
00:13:14,553 --> 00:13:15,762
if you don't go.
314
00:13:15,845 --> 00:13:18,553
I missed a family meeting once,
like, three years ago.
315
00:13:18,637 --> 00:13:20,720
They still call me
"No Show Brad."
316
00:13:20,804 --> 00:13:22,887
So, uh...
317
00:13:22,970 --> 00:13:25,679
you know, what am I supposed
to do during this meeting?
318
00:13:25,762 --> 00:13:28,095
You know, do they expect me
to weigh in on shit?
319
00:13:28,178 --> 00:13:29,762
No, not really.
320
00:13:29,845 --> 00:13:32,053
No one expects you
to offer up your own opinions.
321
00:13:32,136 --> 00:13:33,470
So, what, I just sit there?
322
00:13:33,553 --> 00:13:35,387
No, just support your lady.
323
00:13:35,470 --> 00:13:37,220
Nod a lot when Tami's talking
324
00:13:37,303 --> 00:13:39,011
and then repeat
exactly what she says.
325
00:13:39,095 --> 00:13:40,553
Works like a charm.
326
00:13:40,637 --> 00:13:41,804
So be a yes-man.
327
00:13:41,887 --> 00:13:44,011
- Absolutely. Yes away.
- All right.
328
00:13:44,095 --> 00:13:47,220
It's the only way to survive
a Tamietti relationship.
329
00:13:47,303 --> 00:13:49,261
♪♪♪
330
00:13:49,345 --> 00:13:52,261
♪ upbeat music ♪
331
00:13:52,345 --> 00:13:57,345
♪♪♪
332
00:14:01,512 --> 00:14:02,303
[Claudia]
Debbie!
333
00:14:02,387 --> 00:14:04,470
♪♪♪
334
00:14:04,553 --> 00:14:05,470
Hey.
335
00:14:05,553 --> 00:14:08,095
I have a quick question.
336
00:14:08,178 --> 00:14:09,720
Do you want a job?
337
00:14:09,804 --> 00:14:12,553
Here, with me?
338
00:14:12,637 --> 00:14:14,220
Personal home assistant.
339
00:14:14,303 --> 00:14:16,095
You know, cooking,
running errands,
340
00:14:16,178 --> 00:14:18,178
maybe alphabetizing
hair products.
341
00:14:18,261 --> 00:14:20,804
Anything that will keep you
in my house all day.
342
00:14:20,887 --> 00:14:22,136
[chuckles]
343
00:14:22,220 --> 00:14:23,720
You don't think that'd
be kind of weird,
344
00:14:23,804 --> 00:14:25,303
me working for you?
345
00:14:25,387 --> 00:14:26,720
It doesn't have to be.
346
00:14:26,804 --> 00:14:28,095
I'll pay you $30 an hour.
347
00:14:28,178 --> 00:14:30,136
And you can drive
one of my cars.
348
00:14:30,220 --> 00:14:32,804
The Audi or the, uh,
Range Rover.
349
00:14:32,887 --> 00:14:33,887
You pick.
350
00:14:35,595 --> 00:14:36,970
If you can't tell by now,
351
00:14:37,053 --> 00:14:38,929
I'm, uh...
352
00:14:39,011 --> 00:14:40,720
crazy about you.
353
00:14:42,679 --> 00:14:44,553
How about I think about it?
354
00:14:44,637 --> 00:14:46,345
Yeah. No pressure.
355
00:14:46,428 --> 00:14:49,053
But say yes.
[laughs]
356
00:14:49,136 --> 00:14:50,845
- Bye.
- Bye.
357
00:14:50,929 --> 00:14:55,845
♪♪♪
358
00:14:57,261 --> 00:15:00,178
[camera shutter clicking]
359
00:15:00,261 --> 00:15:05,095
♪♪♪
360
00:15:05,178 --> 00:15:07,011
Shouldn't you be in school?
361
00:15:07,095 --> 00:15:09,845
Got more important stuff to do.
Got to find Frank.
362
00:15:09,929 --> 00:15:10,845
Why?
363
00:15:10,929 --> 00:15:13,053
We couldn't find him
for most of 2005.
364
00:15:13,136 --> 00:15:14,470
Then one day,
there he was,
365
00:15:14,553 --> 00:15:16,345
passed out
on the kitchen floor.
366
00:15:16,428 --> 00:15:18,178
He's like a cat.
He'll be back.
367
00:15:18,261 --> 00:15:19,553
If I don't find him soon,
368
00:15:19,637 --> 00:15:22,178
they're gonna
kick me out of school.
369
00:15:22,261 --> 00:15:23,970
What are you doing?
370
00:15:24,053 --> 00:15:26,804
Trying to find the right
Grindr profile picture.
371
00:15:26,887 --> 00:15:28,720
None of the ones I put up
got any hits.
372
00:15:28,804 --> 00:15:29,720
Grindr?
373
00:15:29,804 --> 00:15:33,053
Aren't you still in love
with Mickey?
374
00:15:33,136 --> 00:15:34,512
Yeah, I am.
375
00:15:34,595 --> 00:15:36,470
But there was the whole
half-proposal thing
376
00:15:36,553 --> 00:15:39,011
and the whole "him getting
a new boyfriend" thing
377
00:15:39,095 --> 00:15:40,303
and the promise-ring thing,
378
00:15:40,387 --> 00:15:42,428
and I'm desperate.
379
00:15:42,512 --> 00:15:44,762
Now I stupidly told him that
I have a date for tomorrow,
380
00:15:44,845 --> 00:15:46,220
and I actually
have to find one.
381
00:15:46,303 --> 00:15:47,637
Sorry I asked.
382
00:15:47,720 --> 00:15:49,887
Let me see those pictures.
383
00:15:54,845 --> 00:15:56,637
These are putting me to sleep.
384
00:15:56,720 --> 00:15:58,387
No one wants to date
their youth pastor
385
00:15:58,470 --> 00:16:00,512
from their grandma's church.
386
00:16:00,595 --> 00:16:02,470
- Jesus.
- You considered spicing it up?
387
00:16:02,553 --> 00:16:04,720
Why not take your shirt off
or something?
388
00:16:04,804 --> 00:16:06,553
I'm looking for a date,
not a hookup.
389
00:16:06,637 --> 00:16:07,720
The way you're headed,
390
00:16:07,804 --> 00:16:09,970
you're not gonna get
either one.
391
00:16:10,053 --> 00:16:11,720
Give me that.
392
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:13,428
Maybe Frank's dead.
393
00:16:13,512 --> 00:16:16,011
Better go call the morgue.
394
00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:22,303
[camera shutter clicks]
395
00:16:22,387 --> 00:16:24,303
I didn't see it coming.
396
00:16:24,387 --> 00:16:29,053
I was a fly caught in the web
the entire time,
397
00:16:29,136 --> 00:16:30,804
and I didn't realize
I was trapped
398
00:16:30,887 --> 00:16:33,762
until the spider
was already eating me.
399
00:16:33,845 --> 00:16:36,595
You know you have the right
to remain silent, right?
400
00:16:36,679 --> 00:16:39,220
Yeah, uh, I'm waiving
all of that.
401
00:16:39,303 --> 00:16:41,428
Only a woman
could've done this.
402
00:16:41,512 --> 00:16:45,136
Only a woman can lure you in,
403
00:16:45,220 --> 00:16:49,345
make you feel
like the king of the castle,
404
00:16:49,428 --> 00:16:52,345
and stab you in the back
all at the same time.
405
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,845
[shoe thuds]
406
00:16:53,929 --> 00:16:57,011
Show me your hands, please.
407
00:16:57,095 --> 00:16:58,804
No. Uh, ears.
408
00:16:58,887 --> 00:17:01,136
You got to do my ears first,
then my nose, then my mouth.
409
00:17:01,220 --> 00:17:04,303
Shit. Sorry.
I'm--I'm kind of new at this.
410
00:17:04,387 --> 00:17:05,512
Oh, that's all right, lad.
411
00:17:05,595 --> 00:17:06,970
I'll walk you through it.
412
00:17:07,053 --> 00:17:10,595
You--you want to hear the--
the real head trip, though?
413
00:17:10,679 --> 00:17:13,679
I still kind of like her.
414
00:17:13,762 --> 00:17:15,804
Her quest for revenge,
415
00:17:15,887 --> 00:17:19,053
albeit bordering
on psychopathy,
416
00:17:19,136 --> 00:17:20,470
is justified.
417
00:17:20,553 --> 00:17:25,178
How can you be angry
at justifiable revenge?
418
00:17:25,261 --> 00:17:26,637
You can't.
419
00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:29,303
And her thoroughness
420
00:17:29,387 --> 00:17:32,136
and her ruthless efficiency...
421
00:17:32,220 --> 00:17:33,553
Ah.
422
00:17:33,637 --> 00:17:37,261
...her attention to detail,
423
00:17:37,345 --> 00:17:39,720
it's impressive,
don't you think?
424
00:17:41,387 --> 00:17:43,178
What next?
425
00:17:43,261 --> 00:17:44,970
The scrotum.
426
00:17:45,053 --> 00:17:47,762
With the right testicular
configuration,
427
00:17:47,845 --> 00:17:50,679
you can hide all kinds
of things under there.
428
00:17:50,762 --> 00:17:55,595
The gooch is mankind's
marsupial pouch.
429
00:17:55,679 --> 00:17:57,136
You remember that.
430
00:17:57,220 --> 00:18:00,053
♪ upbeat music ♪
431
00:18:00,136 --> 00:18:03,637
You know, if--if we'd met
under different circumstances
432
00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:06,595
and I never got her soul mate
locked up for life,
433
00:18:06,679 --> 00:18:08,220
things could've worked out
for us.
434
00:18:08,303 --> 00:18:11,011
I think this is the part
where you spread your cheeks
435
00:18:11,095 --> 00:18:12,261
and...cough?
436
00:18:12,345 --> 00:18:13,970
Exactly right. You see?
437
00:18:14,053 --> 00:18:16,720
You remember more than
you give yourself credit for.
438
00:18:16,804 --> 00:18:19,220
[chuckles]
439
00:18:19,303 --> 00:18:23,637
♪♪♪
440
00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:25,136
[coughs]
441
00:18:25,220 --> 00:18:28,720
♪♪♪
442
00:18:28,804 --> 00:18:31,136
Oh, she's good.
443
00:18:32,887 --> 00:18:34,387
Pay attention.
444
00:18:34,470 --> 00:18:36,553
That's overflowing.
445
00:18:36,637 --> 00:18:39,303
Yo!
Car battery, paint thinner.
446
00:18:39,387 --> 00:18:42,387
Prohibited items
and an overflowing can.
447
00:18:42,470 --> 00:18:43,553
Leave it.
448
00:18:43,637 --> 00:18:45,428
[Carl]
Wait. All of it?
449
00:18:45,512 --> 00:18:46,345
I mean, it's just a few things.
450
00:18:46,428 --> 00:18:47,220
We could pick through it.
451
00:18:47,303 --> 00:18:48,679
Not our job to sort, man.
452
00:18:48,762 --> 00:18:50,428
If we did it for 'em,
how are these fucking people
453
00:18:50,512 --> 00:18:51,720
ever gonna learn?
454
00:18:51,804 --> 00:18:54,053
The only way to teach 'em--
tough love.
455
00:18:54,136 --> 00:18:55,303
Leave it.
456
00:18:55,387 --> 00:18:57,095
Got to bend
with your knees, man.
457
00:18:57,178 --> 00:19:00,428
You only get 7,000 waist-bends
in a lifetime.
458
00:19:00,512 --> 00:19:02,387
Then what happens?
459
00:19:02,470 --> 00:19:04,470
You die.
460
00:19:04,553 --> 00:19:05,929
Hey.
461
00:19:06,011 --> 00:19:08,261
My mom accidentally threw out
a bunch of sneakers--
462
00:19:08,345 --> 00:19:10,011
expensive ones
I was gonna sell online.
463
00:19:10,095 --> 00:19:11,595
Sorry to hear that, kid.
464
00:19:11,679 --> 00:19:13,220
Can you help me get them out?
465
00:19:13,303 --> 00:19:14,428
Oh, no.
466
00:19:14,512 --> 00:19:15,637
Wh--why not?
467
00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:17,387
I'm just that house
right down there.
468
00:19:17,470 --> 00:19:18,804
They're probably still
near the top.
469
00:19:18,887 --> 00:19:20,095
Safety issue.
470
00:19:20,178 --> 00:19:21,470
Come on, bro.
You're killing me.
471
00:19:21,553 --> 00:19:23,095
I'm gonna be out, like,
1,500 bucks.
472
00:19:23,178 --> 00:19:24,929
Call the sanitation department,
473
00:19:25,011 --> 00:19:28,762
tell 'em you lost something
on truck 3871.
474
00:19:28,845 --> 00:19:32,470
They'll send someone
to look for you.
475
00:19:32,553 --> 00:19:34,595
Yo.
476
00:19:34,679 --> 00:19:36,595
This isn't truck 3871.
477
00:19:36,679 --> 00:19:38,345
How slow are you, Carl?
478
00:19:38,428 --> 00:19:40,720
Like, short-bus slow, or...
479
00:19:40,804 --> 00:19:43,220
I guess regular.
480
00:19:43,303 --> 00:19:44,804
Let's go fishing.
481
00:19:48,136 --> 00:19:51,470
Chuck, step up.
Step right up.
482
00:19:51,553 --> 00:19:53,053
[sighs]
483
00:19:53,136 --> 00:19:54,303
Here you go, my friend.
484
00:19:54,387 --> 00:19:56,804
- Enjoy.
- Oh...
485
00:19:56,887 --> 00:19:58,887
[Vin]
More where that came from.
486
00:20:00,845 --> 00:20:02,887
[door closes]
487
00:20:05,220 --> 00:20:06,970
Don't think Frank's dead.
488
00:20:07,053 --> 00:20:08,553
The morgue doesn't have
any record of him.
489
00:20:08,637 --> 00:20:09,804
Well, don't be so sure.
490
00:20:09,887 --> 00:20:11,387
Bodies can spend weeks
in Lake Michigan
491
00:20:11,470 --> 00:20:13,428
before they finally
wash up on shore.
492
00:20:13,512 --> 00:20:16,637
- Maybe he's a floater.
- [phone chiming]
493
00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:18,053
What's going on?
494
00:20:18,136 --> 00:20:20,428
That shirtless picture's
getting me tons of attention.
495
00:20:20,512 --> 00:20:21,637
- You were right.
- [scoffs]
496
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:23,053
Of course I was.
497
00:20:23,136 --> 00:20:26,011
So was I.
None of these are for dates.
498
00:20:26,095 --> 00:20:27,637
Dick pic.
499
00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:28,804
Butthole pic.
500
00:20:28,887 --> 00:20:30,512
Offer to eat my ass.
501
00:20:30,595 --> 00:20:31,512
Dick pic.
502
00:20:31,595 --> 00:20:32,845
Orgy invite.
503
00:20:32,929 --> 00:20:33,929
Dick pic.
504
00:20:35,762 --> 00:20:37,345
Wait.
No idea what that one is.
505
00:20:37,428 --> 00:20:39,637
Oh, wait.
No, it's a dick.
506
00:20:39,720 --> 00:20:40,845
[phone chimes]
507
00:20:40,929 --> 00:20:42,720
Hold on.
508
00:20:42,804 --> 00:20:44,011
This guy...
509
00:20:44,095 --> 00:20:45,178
Cole,
510
00:20:45,261 --> 00:20:46,679
says he's always
looking for an excuse
511
00:20:46,762 --> 00:20:49,970
to put on his best outfit,
and he loves live music.
512
00:20:50,053 --> 00:20:52,178
He's cute.
He seems normal.
513
00:20:52,261 --> 00:20:53,470
Cool.
514
00:20:53,553 --> 00:20:54,637
[indistinct chatter]
515
00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:56,053
[Veronica] Hi.
516
00:20:56,136 --> 00:20:59,011
Kevin Ball
and Veronica Fisher.
517
00:20:59,095 --> 00:21:01,512
Uh, yep. You're all set.
518
00:21:01,595 --> 00:21:02,553
You're lot 14.
519
00:21:02,637 --> 00:21:03,595
Excuse me?
520
00:21:03,679 --> 00:21:05,178
Lot 14.
The auction.
521
00:21:05,261 --> 00:21:06,553
Lot 14?
522
00:21:06,637 --> 00:21:08,887
That's when you'll get up
onstage to be auctioned.
523
00:21:08,970 --> 00:21:10,512
- We're being auctioned?
- Mm-hmm.
524
00:21:10,595 --> 00:21:14,303
V, V, we need to get
out of here right now.
525
00:21:14,387 --> 00:21:15,804
I've seen this in movies.
526
00:21:15,887 --> 00:21:17,387
Before you know it,
we're gonna be in the woods,
527
00:21:17,470 --> 00:21:18,720
and we're gonna be chased down
by rich dudes
528
00:21:18,804 --> 00:21:19,720
that hunt humans for sport.
529
00:21:19,804 --> 00:21:20,804
Look, sweetie,
530
00:21:20,887 --> 00:21:22,261
I shouldn't have to explain
to you
531
00:21:22,345 --> 00:21:24,428
the problem of telling a woman
who looks like me
532
00:21:24,512 --> 00:21:26,220
that she's up for auction.
533
00:21:26,303 --> 00:21:27,553
Oh...
534
00:21:27,637 --> 00:21:28,762
[chuckles, stammers]
535
00:21:28,845 --> 00:21:31,053
This is a date-night
fund-raising auction.
536
00:21:31,136 --> 00:21:32,637
Applicant parents are auct--
537
00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:33,512
Did you say "African"?
538
00:21:33,595 --> 00:21:34,804
Uh, no.
[laughs]
539
00:21:34,887 --> 00:21:38,720
No, um, applicant parents
are auctioned off.
540
00:21:38,804 --> 00:21:40,762
Once the parents that buy you
get to know you,
541
00:21:40,845 --> 00:21:43,178
they report back, let us know
if you're a good fit
542
00:21:43,261 --> 00:21:45,095
for the Eldridge community.
543
00:21:45,178 --> 00:21:47,637
The email explained everything.
544
00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:51,387
When you RSVP'd,
you agreed to participate.
545
00:21:51,470 --> 00:21:52,970
- Right. Got it.
- [chuckles]
546
00:21:53,053 --> 00:21:54,720
Sorry for the confusion.
547
00:21:54,804 --> 00:21:56,178
[chuckles]
548
00:21:56,261 --> 00:21:58,220
[upbeat music playing]
549
00:21:58,303 --> 00:21:59,929
[quietly]
Hi.
550
00:22:00,011 --> 00:22:03,011
We need to get out of here
while we still have a chance.
551
00:22:03,095 --> 00:22:05,970
[door closes,
indistinct chatter]
552
00:22:06,053 --> 00:22:08,512
No Show Brad showed.
553
00:22:08,595 --> 00:22:10,303
Guys, it's a Christmas miracle.
554
00:22:10,387 --> 00:22:11,595
- [light applause]
- [Brad] Thank you. Thank you.
555
00:22:11,679 --> 00:22:12,845
- [Brad] Thank you.
- All right, all right.
556
00:22:12,929 --> 00:22:14,178
Everybody quiet down.
557
00:22:14,261 --> 00:22:16,136
Let's get this meeting started.
558
00:22:16,220 --> 00:22:18,553
First, the bad news.
559
00:22:18,637 --> 00:22:21,220
Oopie and I discovered Nana
560
00:22:21,303 --> 00:22:23,095
wandering the streets
of Milwaukee.
561
00:22:23,178 --> 00:22:25,970
She was barefoot,
disoriented,
562
00:22:26,053 --> 00:22:27,720
and by the time we caught up
with her,
563
00:22:27,804 --> 00:22:29,178
she kept calling me Bing,
564
00:22:29,261 --> 00:22:32,512
and she just wanted to sing
Christmas carols with Oopie.
565
00:22:32,595 --> 00:22:34,428
We made the tough choice
566
00:22:34,512 --> 00:22:36,470
of putting her
in a nursing home.
567
00:22:36,553 --> 00:22:38,970
I told you we should've put her
in a home years ago.
568
00:22:39,053 --> 00:22:41,637
I mean, thank God
we found her when we did.
569
00:22:41,720 --> 00:22:44,136
We really should've put her
in that home five years ago.
570
00:22:44,220 --> 00:22:45,387
[Bob]
Now for the good news.
571
00:22:45,470 --> 00:22:48,011
Nana's house is empty,
no mortgage.
572
00:22:48,095 --> 00:22:49,970
We could rent it out.
573
00:22:50,053 --> 00:22:52,261
One of my clients did that
when her grandpa passed,
574
00:22:52,345 --> 00:22:54,303
and it's, like, free money
every month.
575
00:22:54,387 --> 00:22:55,762
[clears throat]
Yeah, no.
576
00:22:55,845 --> 00:22:57,345
We--we could always--
we could rent it out, you know?
577
00:22:57,428 --> 00:23:00,762
Um, Tami's client
and the client's grandfather--
578
00:23:00,845 --> 00:23:02,470
that's, you know--
you can make a lot of money.
579
00:23:02,553 --> 00:23:03,637
That way--free money.
580
00:23:03,720 --> 00:23:05,720
That's a possibility.
581
00:23:05,804 --> 00:23:09,679
Or we could walk
a more Christian path.
582
00:23:09,762 --> 00:23:13,845
Maybe we should use this turn
of events to demonstrate
583
00:23:13,929 --> 00:23:17,261
Jesus's love for us
by helping family members
584
00:23:17,345 --> 00:23:20,553
who are living
with difficult circumstances,
585
00:23:20,637 --> 00:23:25,011
like a new mom working herself
to the bone to make ends meet
586
00:23:25,095 --> 00:23:28,011
or a new dad
who has to cram his family
587
00:23:28,095 --> 00:23:31,679
into a tiny, decrepit RV
in the backyard.
588
00:23:31,762 --> 00:23:33,470
[Bob]
That's one idea,
589
00:23:33,553 --> 00:23:36,261
an idea I am in favor of.
590
00:23:36,345 --> 00:23:39,136
So, if anyone has a problem
with our suggestion,
591
00:23:39,220 --> 00:23:40,804
now's the time to speak up.
592
00:23:40,887 --> 00:23:45,011
If anyone has an issue
with us doing what's right,
593
00:23:45,095 --> 00:23:48,512
walking the path our Lord
and Savior has laid out for us,
594
00:23:48,595 --> 00:23:51,220
helping those
less fortunate than us,
595
00:23:51,303 --> 00:23:53,804
speak now.
596
00:23:53,887 --> 00:23:56,095
W--
597
00:23:56,178 --> 00:23:57,261
So you're saying that--
598
00:23:57,345 --> 00:23:59,720
We're giving you
Nana's house, sweetheart,
599
00:23:59,804 --> 00:24:02,637
while you get back
on your feet.
600
00:24:06,553 --> 00:24:08,553
So you're doing the mom
and the daughter?
601
00:24:08,637 --> 00:24:09,762
'Cause that's hot.
602
00:24:09,845 --> 00:24:11,136
No, it's not.
603
00:24:11,220 --> 00:24:14,220
- It's going south fast.
- You're going south fast.
604
00:24:14,303 --> 00:24:17,428
[scoffs] No, I'm serious.
It's stressing me out.
605
00:24:17,512 --> 00:24:19,387
I almost got busted
this morning.
606
00:24:19,470 --> 00:24:21,720
I'm starting to feel really
guilty about this whole thing.
607
00:24:21,804 --> 00:24:23,220
No way, girl!
608
00:24:23,303 --> 00:24:25,637
I hooked up with a father
and son once--it was awesome.
609
00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:28,178
One of them is the baby daddy
of my third daughter,
610
00:24:28,261 --> 00:24:30,720
and I have no clue which one.
611
00:24:30,804 --> 00:24:32,679
Why don't you just take
a paternity test?
612
00:24:32,762 --> 00:24:34,553
I just never had to,
'cause, like,
613
00:24:34,637 --> 00:24:37,095
the dad was so afraid
of the wife finding out
614
00:24:37,178 --> 00:24:38,929
that he just gave me
more child support
615
00:24:39,011 --> 00:24:40,887
than the son ever could, so...
616
00:24:40,970 --> 00:24:43,512
So is that child support
or hush money?
617
00:24:45,178 --> 00:24:46,845
I mean, what's the difference?
618
00:24:46,929 --> 00:24:48,303
Claudia, the mom,
619
00:24:48,387 --> 00:24:50,553
she wants to pay me
30 bucks an hour
620
00:24:50,637 --> 00:24:52,470
to basically just
sit around the house all day
621
00:24:52,553 --> 00:24:54,095
and cook a little, clean,
622
00:24:54,178 --> 00:24:55,804
run some errands.
623
00:24:55,887 --> 00:24:58,762
Girl, I have done way worse
for $30, okay?
624
00:24:58,845 --> 00:25:01,553
I have done...some foot stuff.
625
00:25:01,637 --> 00:25:03,804
Like, a lot of foot stuff.
626
00:25:05,178 --> 00:25:09,345
Yeah, so it's not really
just about the money for me.
627
00:25:09,428 --> 00:25:11,345
The daughter,
I don't know.
628
00:25:11,428 --> 00:25:14,470
She's really fun
and creative and smart
629
00:25:14,553 --> 00:25:16,762
and surprisingly super bendy.
630
00:25:16,845 --> 00:25:18,428
I'm so confused.
631
00:25:18,512 --> 00:25:20,303
How is this even
a conversation?
632
00:25:20,387 --> 00:25:23,595
You dump the kid,
and you stick with the money.
633
00:25:23,679 --> 00:25:26,595
[rock music playing
over speakers]
634
00:25:26,679 --> 00:25:28,804
And after that,
we'll go back to our house,
635
00:25:28,887 --> 00:25:30,261
grill up some steaks,
636
00:25:30,345 --> 00:25:32,428
watch an action movie
of your choice
637
00:25:32,512 --> 00:25:35,553
on our state-of-the-art
basement home theater.
638
00:25:35,637 --> 00:25:37,345
[male announcer]
Steaks and action movies.
639
00:25:37,428 --> 00:25:38,679
Who doesn't love that?
640
00:25:38,762 --> 00:25:40,387
All right, let's start
the bidding at $300.
641
00:25:40,470 --> 00:25:41,929
- Do we have $300?
- [man] $300.
642
00:25:42,011 --> 00:25:43,261
[announcer] $300, all right.
$400, $400?
643
00:25:43,345 --> 00:25:44,595
What about $500?
644
00:25:44,679 --> 00:25:46,220
- [woman] $500.
- $500. $500--we've got $500.
645
00:25:46,303 --> 00:25:48,095
$550.
$550 going once.
646
00:25:48,178 --> 00:25:50,136
$550 going twice.
647
00:25:50,220 --> 00:25:52,762
- Sold, $550.
- [scattered cheers]
648
00:25:52,845 --> 00:25:56,011
All right, Please welcome
the next couple up for auction,
649
00:25:56,095 --> 00:25:57,845
lot number 14,
650
00:25:57,929 --> 00:26:00,345
prospective parents
from the South Side,
651
00:26:00,428 --> 00:26:03,720
Veronica Fisher
and Kevin Ball.
652
00:26:03,804 --> 00:26:05,553
- Hi.
- [feedback squeals]
653
00:26:05,637 --> 00:26:09,345
Hi, I'm Veronica.
This is Kevin.
654
00:26:09,428 --> 00:26:13,553
We're the Balls, and, uh,
we are small-business owners,
655
00:26:13,637 --> 00:26:15,804
and we can offer you guys
656
00:26:15,887 --> 00:26:20,428
a night of free drinking
in our humble little bar.
657
00:26:22,470 --> 00:26:25,553
We also have a newly
established medical practice,
658
00:26:25,637 --> 00:26:27,387
where we could offer you
and your daughters
659
00:26:27,470 --> 00:26:28,595
unlimited abo--
660
00:26:31,595 --> 00:26:33,929
I also can provide you
with a personalized workout.
661
00:26:34,011 --> 00:26:36,970
Uh, V and I are in pretty
good shape, so...
662
00:26:37,053 --> 00:26:39,845
[crowd shouting]
663
00:26:39,929 --> 00:26:41,470
[woman]
Take it off!
664
00:26:41,553 --> 00:26:43,011
[crowd murmuring]
665
00:26:43,095 --> 00:26:44,512
[announcer]
All right, a day of drinking
666
00:26:44,595 --> 00:26:47,053
followed
by a personal workout--
667
00:26:47,136 --> 00:26:48,720
[Veronica]
Okay, Magic Mike.
668
00:26:48,804 --> 00:26:50,970
[announcer] Let's start
the bidding at $50.
669
00:26:51,053 --> 00:26:53,970
Do we have $50?
All right, $100, $100.
670
00:26:54,053 --> 00:26:57,261
- Do we have--
- $5,000.
671
00:26:57,345 --> 00:26:59,011
[crowd murmuring]
672
00:26:59,095 --> 00:27:02,178
[announcer]
$5,000? Is that what--
673
00:27:02,261 --> 00:27:03,929
♪ smooth music ♪
674
00:27:04,011 --> 00:27:07,428
$5,000.
675
00:27:07,512 --> 00:27:12,804
♪♪♪
676
00:27:29,345 --> 00:27:31,178
Can we please move away
from the truck?
677
00:27:31,261 --> 00:27:32,428
You get used to it.
678
00:27:32,512 --> 00:27:33,595
- Really?
- This?
679
00:27:33,679 --> 00:27:35,261
This is about
as good as it gets.
680
00:27:35,345 --> 00:27:37,011
It's not even hot out.
681
00:27:37,095 --> 00:27:39,178
You should smell this shit
in July. Whoo!
682
00:27:39,261 --> 00:27:40,345
Remember that time
we ate Indian food
683
00:27:40,428 --> 00:27:41,345
with the corpse in the truck?
684
00:27:41,428 --> 00:27:43,053
60% decomposed.
685
00:27:43,136 --> 00:27:44,929
When the compactor
hit it--splat!
686
00:27:45,011 --> 00:27:47,220
- Like tomatoes.
- Still finished our marsala.
687
00:27:47,303 --> 00:27:49,053
[both chuckling]
688
00:27:49,136 --> 00:27:51,637
- [horn honks]
- We're finishing up.
689
00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:54,303
Give us a second.
We'll move.
690
00:27:54,387 --> 00:27:56,053
[horn honks]
691
00:27:56,136 --> 00:27:58,428
All right, all right.
Hold your horses.
692
00:27:58,512 --> 00:27:59,679
[engine turning over]
693
00:27:59,762 --> 00:28:01,637
Move it up,
move it up.
694
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:03,595
[engine revving]
695
00:28:03,679 --> 00:28:05,845
Got a man in a hurry.
696
00:28:11,136 --> 00:28:13,178
[engine revving, truck beeping]
697
00:28:13,261 --> 00:28:16,178
[Vin] Come on back.
Cut it hard.
698
00:28:16,261 --> 00:28:19,303
[beeping continues]
699
00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:27,720
[motor whirring]
700
00:28:31,428 --> 00:28:34,011
[all chuckling]
701
00:28:34,095 --> 00:28:36,011
- [Vin] That's awesome.
- [Chuck] Oh!
702
00:28:36,095 --> 00:28:38,387
[laughs]
703
00:28:38,470 --> 00:28:40,345
[Vin]
Fuck that guy. Whoo.
704
00:28:45,261 --> 00:28:47,387
You got five minutes.
705
00:28:50,261 --> 00:28:51,762
I told them we were married.
706
00:28:51,845 --> 00:28:53,970
Slipped 'em 50
to bring you to me.
707
00:28:54,053 --> 00:28:55,845
Well, you wasted your money,
708
00:28:55,929 --> 00:28:57,720
'cause I'm not talking to you.
709
00:28:57,804 --> 00:29:00,387
This is how
it had to be, Frank.
710
00:29:02,178 --> 00:29:03,220
I need you to understand
711
00:29:03,303 --> 00:29:06,637
exactly what's
gonna happen and why.
712
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:08,804
They found enough
prescription pills on you
713
00:29:08,887 --> 00:29:11,428
to put you away for 30 years.
714
00:29:11,512 --> 00:29:13,470
I expect you'll spend
the rest of your life
715
00:29:13,553 --> 00:29:15,845
in a maximum-security prison,
716
00:29:15,929 --> 00:29:18,595
just like my dear,
sweet Kyle.
717
00:29:18,679 --> 00:29:20,011
Any way around it?
718
00:29:20,095 --> 00:29:21,512
Justice is justice,
719
00:29:21,595 --> 00:29:24,887
and you got what you deserve.
720
00:29:24,970 --> 00:29:26,595
[sighs]
721
00:29:26,679 --> 00:29:29,053
Will you come visit me
in the big house?
722
00:29:29,136 --> 00:29:31,136
[chuckles]
723
00:29:33,303 --> 00:29:36,720
Take care of yourself, Frank.
724
00:29:36,804 --> 00:29:38,637
I left you a little something.
725
00:29:40,387 --> 00:29:43,261
♪ rock music ♪
726
00:29:43,345 --> 00:29:48,095
♪♪♪
727
00:29:48,178 --> 00:29:50,970
[door closes]
728
00:29:57,178 --> 00:29:59,053
- Hey.
- Hey.
729
00:30:05,261 --> 00:30:07,679
My dad wanted me
to give you these.
730
00:30:10,095 --> 00:30:12,887
Oh, uh,
to your grandma's house.
731
00:30:12,970 --> 00:30:14,220
He made copies
732
00:30:14,303 --> 00:30:16,387
as soon as the hardware store
opened today.
733
00:30:16,470 --> 00:30:17,679
Cool.
734
00:30:24,512 --> 00:30:26,929
So...you want to go see it?
735
00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:30,762
What, the house?
736
00:30:30,845 --> 00:30:32,929
I mean, it's as good
a time as any.
737
00:30:34,970 --> 00:30:36,011
Yeah, no.
738
00:30:36,095 --> 00:30:38,345
I mean, I just started
working on this, so...
739
00:30:40,804 --> 00:30:43,345
Work the only thing
keeping you from going?
740
00:30:43,428 --> 00:30:45,470
Well, yeah, work and, uh...
741
00:30:45,553 --> 00:30:47,804
the fact that
it's in Wisconsin.
742
00:30:47,887 --> 00:30:50,261
You know,
"I live in Wisconsin."
743
00:30:50,345 --> 00:30:53,011
Yeah, that--that doesn't even
sound right, so...
744
00:30:54,345 --> 00:30:57,470
I'm not excited
about Milwaukee either.
745
00:30:57,553 --> 00:31:00,261
But it's a free house.
746
00:31:00,345 --> 00:31:02,720
I mean, I think we got to
at least check it out, right?
747
00:31:02,804 --> 00:31:04,637
I haven't even seen it
in years.
748
00:31:04,720 --> 00:31:06,679
Right.
749
00:31:06,762 --> 00:31:07,720
Right.
750
00:31:10,387 --> 00:31:11,637
[Kev] What's up, bro?
You good?
751
00:31:11,720 --> 00:31:13,053
Never took you
for a day drinker.
752
00:31:13,136 --> 00:31:14,053
Yeah, I'm good.
753
00:31:14,136 --> 00:31:16,261
Just waiting for my date
to get here.
754
00:31:16,345 --> 00:31:17,929
Oh, Mickey?
755
00:31:18,011 --> 00:31:20,637
No, a new guy.
Mickey and I broke up.
756
00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:22,303
Oh, no shit.
757
00:31:22,387 --> 00:31:24,720
Tired of all that
Milkovich bullshit, huh?
758
00:31:26,553 --> 00:31:28,679
Hey, what do you know
about rich people?
759
00:31:28,762 --> 00:31:31,512
I want to thank you
for showing such interest
760
00:31:31,595 --> 00:31:34,011
in our little family
and for pledging so much
761
00:31:34,095 --> 00:31:36,387
to spend the day with us--
it was very generous.
762
00:31:36,470 --> 00:31:37,804
You ever heard
of hunting groups
763
00:31:37,887 --> 00:31:39,845
that track and kill people
for sport?
764
00:31:39,929 --> 00:31:41,595
- Uh--
- Secret societies
765
00:31:41,679 --> 00:31:43,470
that reach the highest
forms of government?
766
00:31:43,553 --> 00:31:45,387
Sex cults?
Devil worshipping?
767
00:31:45,470 --> 00:31:46,595
Private islands
768
00:31:46,679 --> 00:31:48,261
that have fighting tournaments
to the death?
769
00:31:48,345 --> 00:31:49,512
Human traffic--
770
00:31:49,595 --> 00:31:52,178
Can't say I've heard
of any of that, man.
771
00:31:52,261 --> 00:31:54,428
- Holler if you need me.
- Sure.
772
00:31:56,220 --> 00:31:57,637
So a little bit
about our girls.
773
00:31:57,720 --> 00:31:59,303
They are natural learners.
774
00:31:59,387 --> 00:32:01,512
They know all of their letters
and numbers,
775
00:32:01,595 --> 00:32:03,720
and I bet they'll be reading
any day now.
776
00:32:03,804 --> 00:32:07,512
Your patrons are fascinating.
777
00:32:07,595 --> 00:32:09,095
- [Veronica] Really?
- [Lorne] Mm-hmm.
778
00:32:09,178 --> 00:32:11,929
They're just regular
workin' folk.
779
00:32:12,011 --> 00:32:13,804
- So back to the girls--
- [Delphine] Excuse me.
780
00:32:13,887 --> 00:32:15,720
But how can they be working
781
00:32:15,804 --> 00:32:19,595
if they are here in the day
at your bar, drinking?
782
00:32:20,970 --> 00:32:23,720
Night shift?
I don't know.
783
00:32:23,804 --> 00:32:25,845
You're here in the middle
of the day, right?
784
00:32:25,929 --> 00:32:29,970
Yes, of course,
but we are incredibly wealthy.
785
00:32:30,053 --> 00:32:32,178
What are we drinking?
786
00:32:32,261 --> 00:32:34,220
French 75.
787
00:32:34,303 --> 00:32:35,762
Never heard of it.
788
00:32:35,845 --> 00:32:37,387
[laughs]
789
00:32:37,470 --> 00:32:39,637
- Caipirinha.
- Cappa-what?
790
00:32:39,720 --> 00:32:42,136
Sazerac? Negroni?
Um...
791
00:32:43,887 --> 00:32:46,637
Okay.
A La Paloma, hmm?
792
00:32:47,762 --> 00:32:51,220
No-zerac, No-groni,
and La Pa-nopa.
793
00:32:51,303 --> 00:32:52,804
The only fancy thing
we got back there
794
00:32:52,887 --> 00:32:54,053
is a bottle
of "Cream de Mint,"
795
00:32:54,136 --> 00:32:55,595
but that came with the place
when we bought it.
796
00:32:55,679 --> 00:32:56,720
We got beer,
797
00:32:56,804 --> 00:32:58,220
and we got alcohol
from the bottle.
798
00:32:58,303 --> 00:33:00,095
[Lorne]
Well, here's an idea.
799
00:33:00,178 --> 00:33:01,428
Let's skip the bar
800
00:33:01,512 --> 00:33:04,762
and reconvene at your house
after the sun sets.
801
00:33:04,845 --> 00:33:06,595
That way, we can discuss
your application
802
00:33:06,679 --> 00:33:08,970
and, uh, get to know each other
803
00:33:09,053 --> 00:33:12,303
in a more...
intimate setting.
804
00:33:12,387 --> 00:33:13,428
Huh?
805
00:33:13,512 --> 00:33:16,512
[all laughing awkwardly]
806
00:33:19,804 --> 00:33:21,053
Right?
807
00:33:21,136 --> 00:33:22,220
Why are we laughing?
808
00:33:22,303 --> 00:33:23,595
I don't know.
Just go with it.
809
00:33:23,679 --> 00:33:26,679
[laughter continues]
810
00:33:34,261 --> 00:33:36,053
Where Ian Gallagher at?
811
00:33:42,804 --> 00:33:44,595
Hi.
812
00:33:44,679 --> 00:33:47,095
- Oh. Hey.
- [chuckles]
813
00:33:47,178 --> 00:33:50,387
Bitch, why are you
babysitting that drink?
814
00:33:50,470 --> 00:33:51,637
Are we gonna pregame
815
00:33:51,720 --> 00:33:54,428
before we get all musical
and shit or what?
816
00:33:54,512 --> 00:33:57,428
Bartender! Bartender!
817
00:33:57,512 --> 00:34:00,553
I'm gonna need a round
of Henny immediately,
818
00:34:00,637 --> 00:34:01,887
like, immediately.
819
00:34:01,970 --> 00:34:03,220
[gasps]
820
00:34:03,303 --> 00:34:05,136
Let's get turnt
in this motherfucker.
821
00:34:05,220 --> 00:34:06,637
[laughs]
822
00:34:08,470 --> 00:34:11,136
I know you're worried
about our age difference,
823
00:34:11,220 --> 00:34:12,804
you know, about my mom,
824
00:34:12,887 --> 00:34:15,512
but the chemistry
we have between us...
825
00:34:15,595 --> 00:34:18,303
it's crazy, right?
826
00:34:18,387 --> 00:34:19,762
[Debbie]
Yeah, it is.
827
00:34:19,845 --> 00:34:20,887
[Julia]
I-I know it's early,
828
00:34:20,970 --> 00:34:23,553
but I think this
could be the real thing,
829
00:34:23,637 --> 00:34:26,970
and if it is, just fuck
all the other stuff.
830
00:34:27,053 --> 00:34:29,261
You know?
That's just noise.
831
00:34:29,345 --> 00:34:32,261
We can't let noise get in
the way of what this could be.
832
00:34:32,345 --> 00:34:35,095
Uh, Julia, what is with
all these signs?
833
00:34:36,720 --> 00:34:38,845
Oh, my God.
834
00:34:38,929 --> 00:34:41,220
Is this a promposal?
835
00:34:41,303 --> 00:34:43,261
[laughs]
836
00:34:45,595 --> 00:34:47,470
Okay, Mr. Gallagher.
837
00:34:47,553 --> 00:34:49,720
You've heard the charges
against you.
838
00:34:49,804 --> 00:34:52,053
What's your plea?
839
00:34:52,136 --> 00:34:53,553
I plead not guilty.
840
00:34:53,637 --> 00:34:54,845
I was framed.
841
00:34:54,929 --> 00:34:57,387
Humor me, Mr. Gallagher.
842
00:34:57,470 --> 00:34:59,679
Who framed you?
843
00:34:59,762 --> 00:35:01,136
[sighs]
844
00:35:05,679 --> 00:35:06,720
Okay, then.
845
00:35:06,804 --> 00:35:08,595
Let's schedule
the preliminary hearing.
846
00:35:08,679 --> 00:35:09,762
My calendar?
847
00:35:09,845 --> 00:35:11,053
It was the drug companies.
848
00:35:11,136 --> 00:35:12,428
Excuse me?
849
00:35:12,512 --> 00:35:14,095
The companies
that made the pills--
850
00:35:14,178 --> 00:35:15,929
they're the ones
who set me up.
851
00:35:16,011 --> 00:35:18,136
A guy like me,
852
00:35:18,220 --> 00:35:21,261
a father of five--
uh, six--
853
00:35:21,345 --> 00:35:24,095
struggling with addiction
all his life?
854
00:35:24,178 --> 00:35:25,804
I never stood a chance.
855
00:35:25,887 --> 00:35:27,637
It's entrapment,
Your Honor,
856
00:35:27,720 --> 00:35:29,428
pharmaceutical entrapment.
857
00:35:29,512 --> 00:35:30,553
It's the corporations--
858
00:35:30,637 --> 00:35:31,845
Let me get this straight.
859
00:35:31,929 --> 00:35:34,011
You think that a company
that doesn't know you from Adam
860
00:35:34,095 --> 00:35:35,887
should be the one
standing here today
861
00:35:35,970 --> 00:35:39,428
instead of you,
a criminal,
862
00:35:39,512 --> 00:35:42,845
whose record dates back
to the Nixon administration?
863
00:35:44,762 --> 00:35:47,595
That's not the way I would've
phrased it, but, yes.
864
00:35:47,679 --> 00:35:49,053
More or less, yes.
865
00:35:49,136 --> 00:35:50,220
Okay.
866
00:35:50,303 --> 00:35:51,845
Well, let me elucidate you
867
00:35:51,929 --> 00:35:55,053
on the perspective of this
court, Mr. Gallagher.
868
00:35:55,136 --> 00:35:57,053
[sighs]
869
00:35:57,136 --> 00:35:58,595
I agree with you.
870
00:36:01,220 --> 00:36:03,428
I grew up on the South Side
of Chicago.
871
00:36:03,512 --> 00:36:04,762
I have friends and family
872
00:36:04,845 --> 00:36:07,011
whose whole lives
were turned upside down
873
00:36:07,095 --> 00:36:09,970
just 'cause they had a couple
of crack rocks in their pocket.
874
00:36:10,053 --> 00:36:12,303
My own brother did ten years
875
00:36:12,387 --> 00:36:14,762
on some trumped-up
possession charge.
876
00:36:14,845 --> 00:36:17,136
That is a crying shame.
877
00:36:17,220 --> 00:36:19,929
Your Honor, I don't mean
to speak out of turn,
878
00:36:20,011 --> 00:36:23,720
but what exactly
did the War on Drugs get us,
879
00:36:23,804 --> 00:36:26,303
other than generations
of locked-up parents
880
00:36:26,387 --> 00:36:28,303
away from families
who needed them?
881
00:36:28,387 --> 00:36:29,387
Mm-hmm.
882
00:36:29,470 --> 00:36:31,679
Why repeat the same cycle?
883
00:36:33,762 --> 00:36:36,553
Why tear Mr. Gallagher away
from his kids?
884
00:36:36,637 --> 00:36:40,053
Why punish a fellow citizen
who has a problem?
885
00:36:40,136 --> 00:36:42,178
An illness, Your Honor.
886
00:36:42,261 --> 00:36:45,345
An illness foisted on me
by greedy drug companies.
887
00:36:45,428 --> 00:36:49,261
I've never heard of an illness
best cured by prison.
888
00:36:49,345 --> 00:36:51,970
Me neither.
Have you, Mr. McClatchy?
889
00:36:55,136 --> 00:36:57,929
[McClatchy sighs]
No, ma'am.
890
00:36:58,011 --> 00:37:00,261
The district attorney
and the citizens of Chicago
891
00:37:00,345 --> 00:37:02,428
agree with you, Your Honor.
892
00:37:02,512 --> 00:37:06,261
I think we all desire
a new approach.
893
00:37:06,345 --> 00:37:07,845
[Frank]
Uh, Your Honor,
894
00:37:07,929 --> 00:37:10,595
all due deference
and with respect,
895
00:37:10,679 --> 00:37:13,387
but maybe it's time for you
to be the change
896
00:37:13,470 --> 00:37:16,011
you want to see in the world.
897
00:37:16,095 --> 00:37:18,595
Don't push it, Mr. Gallagher.
898
00:37:19,929 --> 00:37:22,929
Without any objections
from the prosecution,
899
00:37:23,011 --> 00:37:27,053
I believe that a pre-trial
intervention is appropriate.
900
00:37:27,136 --> 00:37:29,679
Mr. Gallagher...
901
00:37:31,178 --> 00:37:32,595
...the Court hereby orders you
902
00:37:32,679 --> 00:37:35,512
to complete 100 hours
of community service
903
00:37:35,595 --> 00:37:36,679
and a court-approved
904
00:37:36,762 --> 00:37:39,595
residential addiction
therapy program.
905
00:37:39,679 --> 00:37:41,387
All rise.
906
00:37:41,470 --> 00:37:44,011
[Frank] Thank you, Your Honor.
Thank you.
907
00:37:44,095 --> 00:37:46,011
Hey.
908
00:37:46,095 --> 00:37:48,136
[chuckles]
909
00:37:52,428 --> 00:37:53,970
[door closes]
910
00:37:54,053 --> 00:37:56,845
[rock music playing
over speakers]
911
00:37:56,929 --> 00:37:59,053
About Lorne and Delphine
coming over tonight,
912
00:37:59,136 --> 00:38:00,261
I'm starting to think
they might be--
913
00:38:00,345 --> 00:38:01,387
They're swingers?
914
00:38:01,470 --> 00:38:03,345
Why else would they pay
$5,000 to date us
915
00:38:03,428 --> 00:38:04,970
if they didn't expect sex?
916
00:38:05,053 --> 00:38:06,762
And at this point,
the only way our daughters
917
00:38:06,845 --> 00:38:09,595
are gonna get into Eldridge
is by engaging in a night
918
00:38:09,679 --> 00:38:11,804
of extremely perverted
wife-swapping.
919
00:38:13,178 --> 00:38:14,929
So I guess
we should cancel.
920
00:38:15,011 --> 00:38:16,804
- [sighs]
- It's a shame.
921
00:38:16,887 --> 00:38:18,220
Without Eldridge, our girls
922
00:38:18,303 --> 00:38:19,720
are gonna be putting
their life on the line
923
00:38:19,804 --> 00:38:21,970
every day in public school.
924
00:38:22,053 --> 00:38:24,929
I mean, unless...
925
00:38:25,011 --> 00:38:27,136
Unless what?
926
00:38:28,178 --> 00:38:29,387
Swinging?
[chuckles]
927
00:38:29,470 --> 00:38:31,762
It wouldn't be the freakiest
thing we've ever done.
928
00:38:31,845 --> 00:38:33,136
And she's French.
929
00:38:33,220 --> 00:38:36,095
So, in Europe, it's probably
pretty normal, right?
930
00:38:36,178 --> 00:38:37,679
Are you saying
we should do it?
931
00:38:37,762 --> 00:38:39,512
I'm--no, I'm--
I'm saying maybe--
932
00:38:39,595 --> 00:38:40,595
[sighs]
933
00:38:40,679 --> 00:38:43,428
Eldridge is awesome.
934
00:38:43,512 --> 00:38:46,595
I think Scottie Pippen's kids
went to Eldridge.
935
00:38:46,679 --> 00:38:48,762
Rumor has it
Brian Urlacher's did, too.
936
00:38:48,845 --> 00:38:50,929
It doesn't get
cooler than that.
937
00:38:51,011 --> 00:38:53,261
So you would do it?
Swing with them?
938
00:38:55,220 --> 00:38:56,720
All right,
this feels like a trap.
939
00:38:56,804 --> 00:38:58,470
It's not.
940
00:38:58,553 --> 00:39:01,887
You know I would do anything
for you and the girls.
941
00:39:01,970 --> 00:39:04,512
So, if you want me to bang
some extremely hot French lady,
942
00:39:04,595 --> 00:39:06,637
I will, I guess.
943
00:39:06,720 --> 00:39:10,470
And I guess...
I could stomach
944
00:39:10,553 --> 00:39:12,512
letting some living Ken doll
clap my cakes--
945
00:39:12,595 --> 00:39:13,512
for the girls, of course.
946
00:39:13,595 --> 00:39:15,553
- Clap your what?
- I don't know.
947
00:39:16,720 --> 00:39:18,929
[Tami] I used to spend
a month each summer
948
00:39:19,011 --> 00:39:20,261
visiting Nana in Milwaukee.
949
00:39:20,345 --> 00:39:21,095
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
950
00:39:21,178 --> 00:39:22,220
When I was nine,
951
00:39:22,303 --> 00:39:24,720
this drive felt
like it took forever.
952
00:39:24,804 --> 00:39:26,804
I mean, I would've told you
that it would take all day,
953
00:39:26,887 --> 00:39:27,970
but look.
954
00:39:28,053 --> 00:39:31,011
GPS says two hours.
955
00:39:31,095 --> 00:39:33,095
It takes longer to get
across town in traffic.
956
00:39:33,178 --> 00:39:36,553
- That's not so bad, right?
- No. No, it's not bad.
957
00:39:50,720 --> 00:39:52,178
Yo, how long are we
standing around
958
00:39:52,261 --> 00:39:53,470
until you tell me
what we're doing?
959
00:39:53,553 --> 00:39:56,095
- We're waiting.
- For what?
960
00:39:56,178 --> 00:39:57,553
For that.
961
00:39:59,595 --> 00:40:00,887
[tapping]
962
00:40:00,970 --> 00:40:03,887
♪ devious music ♪
963
00:40:03,970 --> 00:40:08,053
♪♪♪
964
00:40:08,136 --> 00:40:09,428
[Vin]
Hey, boss.
965
00:40:09,512 --> 00:40:11,345
Fellas.
966
00:40:11,428 --> 00:40:14,345
So what do you guys say
we check out this open house?
967
00:40:14,428 --> 00:40:16,637
Hmm?
968
00:40:16,720 --> 00:40:18,929
You stay.
Watch the truck.
969
00:40:19,011 --> 00:40:24,053
♪♪♪
970
00:40:29,970 --> 00:40:31,679
[gate closes]
971
00:40:31,762 --> 00:40:33,887
[knocks softly]
972
00:40:33,970 --> 00:40:38,804
♪♪♪
973
00:40:38,887 --> 00:40:42,178
What the fuck?
974
00:40:42,261 --> 00:40:45,220
[Julia sobbing]
975
00:40:45,303 --> 00:40:46,720
- [Debbie] Hey.
- No, don't touch me.
976
00:40:46,804 --> 00:40:48,345
[quietly]
Okay.
977
00:40:48,428 --> 00:40:50,804
We let things
get out of hand.
978
00:40:50,887 --> 00:40:52,845
It was fun while it lasted.
979
00:40:52,929 --> 00:40:55,929
But I can't go
to a school dance with you.
980
00:40:56,011 --> 00:40:57,303
That's just not possible,
Julia.
981
00:40:57,387 --> 00:40:59,387
[sobbing]
It would be possible...
982
00:40:59,470 --> 00:41:03,053
if you liked me
as much as I like you.
983
00:41:03,136 --> 00:41:04,720
I'm sleeping
with your mom, Julia.
984
00:41:04,804 --> 00:41:06,220
So dump her!
985
00:41:06,303 --> 00:41:09,095
I can't afford that right now--
emotionally.
986
00:41:09,178 --> 00:41:11,720
[gasps]
Do you love her?
987
00:41:11,804 --> 00:41:14,136
I'm growing
to care for her.
988
00:41:14,220 --> 00:41:16,011
But she's so old!
989
00:41:16,095 --> 00:41:19,095
She watches "60 Minutes."
990
00:41:19,178 --> 00:41:22,303
She bleaches her mustache.
991
00:41:22,387 --> 00:41:24,762
She lasers the varicose veins
in her legs.
992
00:41:24,845 --> 00:41:27,011
Have you seen her calves?
993
00:41:27,095 --> 00:41:30,261
They're a fucking subway map.
994
00:41:30,345 --> 00:41:32,178
[sobs]
995
00:41:32,261 --> 00:41:34,345
What do you even see in her?
996
00:41:37,011 --> 00:41:38,804
I'm gonna threaten
to kill myself.
997
00:41:38,887 --> 00:41:40,387
[stammers]
You're gonna threaten,
998
00:41:40,470 --> 00:41:41,929
or you're gonna actually
try to kill yourself?
999
00:41:42,011 --> 00:41:44,512
I hate you!
[sobs]
1000
00:41:50,553 --> 00:41:53,095
Mr. Gallagher,
welcome to Placid Journeys.
1001
00:41:53,178 --> 00:41:55,470
I'm Mora.
I run the place.
1002
00:41:55,553 --> 00:41:58,303
Over that way is the spa
and the meditation room.
1003
00:41:58,387 --> 00:42:01,136
Down there is the kitchen
with our 24-hour onsite chef.
1004
00:42:01,220 --> 00:42:03,970
Now, she specializes
in farm-to-table.
1005
00:42:04,053 --> 00:42:05,512
It's parsnip season.
1006
00:42:05,595 --> 00:42:07,303
You like parsnips?
1007
00:42:07,387 --> 00:42:09,261
As much as the next fella,
I guess.
1008
00:42:09,345 --> 00:42:11,220
- Mm.
- So...
1009
00:42:11,303 --> 00:42:13,428
what do you guys
have on tap here?
1010
00:42:13,512 --> 00:42:14,261
Methadone?
1011
00:42:14,345 --> 00:42:17,095
This is behavioral therapy.
1012
00:42:17,178 --> 00:42:18,595
We mainly just talk.
1013
00:42:18,679 --> 00:42:20,637
Jesus. Really?
1014
00:42:20,720 --> 00:42:23,220
You like smoothies?
1015
00:42:23,303 --> 00:42:25,011
Come on.
1016
00:42:25,095 --> 00:42:27,136
I got to say,
this is nothing like
1017
00:42:27,220 --> 00:42:30,553
the rehab facility
I was sent to back in the day.
1018
00:42:30,637 --> 00:42:31,970
And I can't help but notice
1019
00:42:32,053 --> 00:42:33,720
that the demographics
have changed.
1020
00:42:33,804 --> 00:42:37,595
- Everybody here is--
- Young, white, rich.
1021
00:42:37,679 --> 00:42:39,261
It's the opioid epidemic.
1022
00:42:39,345 --> 00:42:40,804
Doctors spent years
1023
00:42:40,887 --> 00:42:43,053
under-prescribing black people
pain medication,
1024
00:42:43,136 --> 00:42:45,261
so they never had a chance
to get addicted,
1025
00:42:45,345 --> 00:42:47,178
and they don't wind up here.
1026
00:42:47,261 --> 00:42:48,970
All that oppression,
and you don't even get
1027
00:42:49,053 --> 00:42:51,345
a shot at a good
doctor-prescribed high?
1028
00:42:51,428 --> 00:42:53,345
Meanwhile...
1029
00:42:53,428 --> 00:42:55,679
a white cheerleader
sprains an ankle,
1030
00:42:55,762 --> 00:42:58,428
and she gets prescribed
a 90-day supply of Oxy
1031
00:42:58,512 --> 00:43:00,178
- with six refills.
- [chuckles]
1032
00:43:00,261 --> 00:43:01,929
- What are you gonna do?
- Hmm.
1033
00:43:20,553 --> 00:43:22,679
[car door closes]
1034
00:43:22,762 --> 00:43:26,303
[door opens, closes]
1035
00:43:29,011 --> 00:43:30,261
Well, it's clean.
1036
00:43:36,553 --> 00:43:38,887
[Tami]
It smells like my grandma.
1037
00:43:41,053 --> 00:43:43,970
[Tami] I don't see anything
falling down.
1038
00:43:45,970 --> 00:43:48,220
Yeah, I was, uh...
1039
00:43:48,303 --> 00:43:53,136
kind of expecting a crazy old
cat lady hoarder house.
1040
00:43:53,220 --> 00:43:54,887
[chuckles]
1041
00:43:54,970 --> 00:43:56,720
I mean,
this wallpaper is awful.
1042
00:43:56,804 --> 00:43:58,136
We'd take that down.
1043
00:43:58,220 --> 00:43:59,887
But I mean, I don't know.
1044
00:44:00,011 --> 00:44:01,220
Am I crazy?
1045
00:44:01,303 --> 00:44:02,887
This isn't that bad.
1046
00:44:02,970 --> 00:44:04,261
I'm gonna check out
the upstairs.
1047
00:44:04,345 --> 00:44:05,845
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1048
00:44:27,345 --> 00:44:30,428
- [Tami] Pretty big, huh?
- [Lip] Yeah.
1049
00:44:30,512 --> 00:44:33,011
If you wanted to keep
fixing bikes on the side,
1050
00:44:33,095 --> 00:44:35,428
you'd have the space.
1051
00:44:35,512 --> 00:44:38,220
And I mean, I could fit
a lift stand right here.
1052
00:44:38,303 --> 00:44:40,261
Work bench.
1053
00:44:40,345 --> 00:44:41,178
Tool cabinet.
1054
00:44:41,261 --> 00:44:43,095
I could get maybe...
1055
00:44:43,178 --> 00:44:45,887
maybe two bikes in here
at a time, three in a pinch.
1056
00:44:48,679 --> 00:44:49,428
It's nice.
1057
00:44:49,512 --> 00:44:50,887
Yeah.
1058
00:44:52,553 --> 00:44:54,053
- Pension?
- Yeah.
1059
00:44:54,136 --> 00:44:57,053
Pension, holiday,
health benefits,
1060
00:44:57,136 --> 00:44:59,136
maternity leave.
1061
00:44:59,220 --> 00:45:01,303
Well, I don't really
see maternity leave
1062
00:45:01,387 --> 00:45:02,387
being an issue,
1063
00:45:02,470 --> 00:45:04,970
so long as you and I
are exclusive.
1064
00:45:05,053 --> 00:45:07,345
- But everything else...
- [refrigerator door opens]
1065
00:45:07,428 --> 00:45:09,470
I'm sure we can
work something out.
1066
00:45:09,553 --> 00:45:12,303
[refrigerator door closes]
1067
00:45:12,387 --> 00:45:14,720
I thought we were
watching our carbs.
1068
00:45:15,970 --> 00:45:19,053
So is that a yes
to my offer?
1069
00:45:20,887 --> 00:45:23,845
Julia, honey, you'd like
to have Debbie around more,
1070
00:45:23,929 --> 00:45:24,762
wouldn't you?
1071
00:45:31,512 --> 00:45:32,929
All right, well,
1072
00:45:33,011 --> 00:45:34,136
don't mind her.
1073
00:45:34,220 --> 00:45:36,720
She's just mad
because some boy at school
1074
00:45:36,804 --> 00:45:38,887
wouldn't go to the school dance
with her.
1075
00:45:38,970 --> 00:45:41,470
Then she comes home,
and she orders pizza,
1076
00:45:41,553 --> 00:45:45,095
and it's like, the only thing
more unforgiving than a scale
1077
00:45:45,178 --> 00:45:47,512
is a shallow teenage boy.
1078
00:45:47,595 --> 00:45:50,011
- Am I right?
- [scoffs] Yeah.
1079
00:45:50,095 --> 00:45:52,095
- Boys. Heartbreakers.
- [sighs]
1080
00:45:57,095 --> 00:45:57,970
Hey, Berto.
1081
00:45:58,053 --> 00:45:59,679
[sighs]
1082
00:45:59,762 --> 00:46:01,845
- Trying to find my dad.
- Yeah, good luck.
1083
00:46:03,220 --> 00:46:04,387
I was hoping you could help.
1084
00:46:06,804 --> 00:46:07,720
How?
1085
00:46:07,804 --> 00:46:09,261
He was hanging out
with a Latina lady
1086
00:46:09,345 --> 00:46:11,470
named Faye
who owns a Rolls Royce.
1087
00:46:11,553 --> 00:46:12,804
Maybe you could
look her up for me?
1088
00:46:12,887 --> 00:46:13,970
You sure this can't wait?
1089
00:46:14,053 --> 00:46:15,512
I literally just
bought this pizza,
1090
00:46:15,595 --> 00:46:17,303
and it's only getting colder
by the second.
1091
00:46:17,387 --> 00:46:19,428
I'm desperate.
1092
00:46:19,512 --> 00:46:21,387
All right,
step into my office.
1093
00:46:26,720 --> 00:46:29,595
♪ ominous music ♪
1094
00:46:29,679 --> 00:46:34,970
♪♪♪
1095
00:46:41,178 --> 00:46:42,595
[blow landing]
1096
00:46:42,679 --> 00:46:44,095
[objects clattering]
1097
00:46:44,178 --> 00:46:46,637
♪♪♪
1098
00:46:46,720 --> 00:46:48,053
[man grunts]
1099
00:46:48,136 --> 00:46:50,970
[Otis] We ain't got
no free services, you heard?
1100
00:46:51,053 --> 00:46:52,595
So give us what you owe,
1101
00:46:52,679 --> 00:46:55,136
or we gonna be
at every open house you got.
1102
00:46:55,220 --> 00:46:56,345
- [man grunts]
- Jesus.
1103
00:46:56,428 --> 00:46:59,095
♪♪♪
1104
00:46:59,178 --> 00:47:00,178
[Alex]
I was high.
1105
00:47:01,679 --> 00:47:03,720
I was on another planet, man.
1106
00:47:03,804 --> 00:47:05,845
I never should've been
behind the wheel, but...
1107
00:47:07,220 --> 00:47:08,261
...there I was.
1108
00:47:08,345 --> 00:47:09,929
One second,
I'm going the wrong way
1109
00:47:10,011 --> 00:47:11,261
through a Taco Bell
drive-through.
1110
00:47:11,345 --> 00:47:12,970
[sniffles]
1111
00:47:13,053 --> 00:47:14,303
Next second,
1112
00:47:14,387 --> 00:47:15,929
I'm in a field in Indiana
1113
00:47:16,011 --> 00:47:18,178
drinking milk directly
from a cow's udder.
1114
00:47:19,679 --> 00:47:21,762
And my dad's all like,
1115
00:47:21,845 --> 00:47:24,387
"Well, that's the second
Mercedes you've lost."
1116
00:47:24,470 --> 00:47:25,845
And I'm like,
"Well, I'm fine, Dad.
1117
00:47:25,929 --> 00:47:28,053
Thanks for asking.
1118
00:47:28,136 --> 00:47:30,512
The salmonella's
finally cleared up."
1119
00:47:32,553 --> 00:47:35,679
And then he brought me
here again.
1120
00:47:35,762 --> 00:47:38,136
I just think he wanted me
out of the picture....
1121
00:47:38,220 --> 00:47:39,470
[breathing shakily]
1122
00:47:39,553 --> 00:47:43,637
...so I didn't embarrass him
in front of his...
1123
00:47:43,720 --> 00:47:45,303
Can't you do something
for this poor kid?
1124
00:47:45,387 --> 00:47:46,887
He's obviously dope sick.
1125
00:47:46,970 --> 00:47:48,387
[Mora]
No, I can't.
1126
00:47:48,470 --> 00:47:50,553
But since you took it upon
yourself to interrupt him,
1127
00:47:50,637 --> 00:47:52,428
perhaps you'd like
to share next.
1128
00:47:52,512 --> 00:47:53,512
Share what?
1129
00:47:53,595 --> 00:47:55,887
Most people use
their initial share
1130
00:47:55,970 --> 00:47:57,762
to recount their
addiction journey.
1131
00:47:57,845 --> 00:47:59,011
[laughs]
1132
00:47:59,095 --> 00:48:00,679
How long is this session?
1133
00:48:00,762 --> 00:48:02,345
We have two hours left, Frank.
1134
00:48:02,428 --> 00:48:04,053
Just two hours,
and you're wasting your time
1135
00:48:04,136 --> 00:48:05,595
on amateur stuff?
1136
00:48:05,679 --> 00:48:07,095
Sorry.
1137
00:48:07,178 --> 00:48:09,011
Okay.
1138
00:48:09,095 --> 00:48:12,512
How many here have mixed
a bottle of fentanyl nose spray
1139
00:48:12,595 --> 00:48:14,303
with a half-gallon
of orange juice
1140
00:48:14,387 --> 00:48:15,512
and hidden in the wheel well
1141
00:48:15,595 --> 00:48:18,637
of an American Airlines flight
to Rio de Janeiro?
1142
00:48:18,720 --> 00:48:19,762
Hands?
1143
00:48:21,178 --> 00:48:22,679
No one?
1144
00:48:22,762 --> 00:48:25,053
Really?
[laughs]
1145
00:48:25,136 --> 00:48:27,095
Okay, I think I'll start there.
1146
00:48:27,178 --> 00:48:28,053
♪ Would you rescue me? ♪
1147
00:48:28,136 --> 00:48:29,595
♪ Would you get my back? ♪
1148
00:48:29,679 --> 00:48:31,220
♪ Would you take my call
when I start to crack? ♪
1149
00:48:31,303 --> 00:48:32,220
♪ Would you rescue me? ♪
1150
00:48:32,303 --> 00:48:33,136
♪ Uh ♪
1151
00:48:33,220 --> 00:48:35,220
♪ Would you rescue me? ♪
1152
00:48:35,303 --> 00:48:37,095
♪ Would you rescue me
when I'm by myself ♪
1153
00:48:37,178 --> 00:48:39,136
♪ When I need your love,
if I need your help? ♪
1154
00:48:39,220 --> 00:48:40,220
[Cole]
Yes, bitch,
1155
00:48:40,303 --> 00:48:42,220
I got the card-duplication
machine thingy,
1156
00:48:42,303 --> 00:48:44,011
but if you got the number
and the expiration date,
1157
00:48:44,095 --> 00:48:45,345
then you're good to go.
1158
00:48:45,428 --> 00:48:47,428
[chuckles]
Yes, spend, girl,
1159
00:48:47,512 --> 00:48:48,720
before they realize
you took it.
1160
00:48:48,804 --> 00:48:50,178
And get me some boots, too.
1161
00:48:50,261 --> 00:48:51,845
Not Uggs, bitch, okay?
1162
00:48:51,970 --> 00:48:53,679
I'm not trying to look
basic this fall.
1163
00:48:53,762 --> 00:48:55,178
[laughs]
1164
00:48:55,261 --> 00:48:58,095
Yes, the thievery of it all.
1165
00:48:58,178 --> 00:48:59,470
Oh, yeah. Okay.
1166
00:48:59,553 --> 00:49:01,136
I'm on a date, so I got to go.
1167
00:49:01,220 --> 00:49:03,929
[laughs]
1168
00:49:04,011 --> 00:49:05,720
You want a show?
1169
00:49:05,804 --> 00:49:07,553
Watch me walk away.
1170
00:49:07,637 --> 00:49:10,095
♪ If I'm... ♪
1171
00:49:10,178 --> 00:49:12,053
[Cole]
Ooh. [laughs]
1172
00:49:12,136 --> 00:49:15,720
♪ ...slipping under, under ♪
1173
00:49:15,804 --> 00:49:17,762
What the fuck is that?
1174
00:49:17,845 --> 00:49:19,261
That is Cole.
1175
00:49:19,345 --> 00:49:21,053
He's my date.
1176
00:49:21,136 --> 00:49:23,220
Uh-huh.
1177
00:49:23,303 --> 00:49:25,053
What's he doing?
1178
00:49:25,136 --> 00:49:27,387
♪ When I need your love,
if I need your help ♪
1179
00:49:27,470 --> 00:49:29,136
He's getting us drinks.
1180
00:49:29,220 --> 00:49:30,428
♪ Would you rescue me? ♪
1181
00:49:30,512 --> 00:49:31,720
[knock on door]
1182
00:49:31,804 --> 00:49:34,929
♪ Slow flame
is what we got ♪
1183
00:49:35,011 --> 00:49:36,387
♪♪♪
1184
00:49:36,470 --> 00:49:38,929
♪ It doesn't own us ♪
1185
00:49:39,011 --> 00:49:42,428
♪ But I like it a lot,
a lot ♪
1186
00:49:42,512 --> 00:49:45,011
♪ Slow flame... ♪
1187
00:49:45,095 --> 00:49:46,470
Can I help you?
1188
00:49:46,553 --> 00:49:48,637
♪♪♪
1189
00:49:48,720 --> 00:49:49,679
Hiya.
1190
00:49:49,762 --> 00:49:52,220
Thanks for having us.
1191
00:49:52,303 --> 00:49:53,929
Oh, this is our boy, Simon.
1192
00:49:54,011 --> 00:49:55,595
- [door closes]
- Bonsoir.
1193
00:49:55,679 --> 00:49:56,553
♪♪♪
1194
00:49:56,637 --> 00:49:57,428
[Lorne]
Bonsoir.
1195
00:49:57,512 --> 00:49:59,095
C'est magnifique.
1196
00:49:59,178 --> 00:50:00,970
♪♪♪
1197
00:50:01,053 --> 00:50:03,345
Can I offer you guys
something to drink?
1198
00:50:03,428 --> 00:50:04,929
Soda, water?
1199
00:50:05,011 --> 00:50:06,762
[speaking French]
1200
00:50:06,845 --> 00:50:08,387
[chuckles]
1201
00:50:08,470 --> 00:50:10,595
♪ I'll be here
when you're ready ♪
1202
00:50:10,679 --> 00:50:13,929
♪ If my pride
don't get in the way ♪
1203
00:50:14,011 --> 00:50:16,136
What are
these strange papers, Papa?
1204
00:50:16,220 --> 00:50:17,970
Um...
1205
00:50:18,053 --> 00:50:19,762
good question, Simon.
1206
00:50:19,845 --> 00:50:21,011
This is, uh...
1207
00:50:21,095 --> 00:50:22,887
It's not organic.
1208
00:50:22,970 --> 00:50:24,512
I thought this
was gonna be about sex.
1209
00:50:24,595 --> 00:50:26,470
Me too. I waxed.
1210
00:50:26,553 --> 00:50:29,095
But we just need to play nice
and be good hosts.
1211
00:50:29,178 --> 00:50:30,637
These guys are reporting back
1212
00:50:30,720 --> 00:50:32,303
to the admissions committee,
remember?
1213
00:50:32,387 --> 00:50:33,720
♪ Different rains ♪
1214
00:50:33,804 --> 00:50:35,303
♪ Different winds ♪
1215
00:50:35,387 --> 00:50:37,595
What is wrong,
mon petite étoile?
1216
00:50:37,679 --> 00:50:41,011
You said this place would
be filthy and falling apart.
1217
00:50:41,095 --> 00:50:43,929
You said there'd
be insects and rats.
1218
00:50:44,011 --> 00:50:45,804
I want a rat.
1219
00:50:45,887 --> 00:50:47,136
Excuse me.
1220
00:50:47,220 --> 00:50:49,470
Where are your roaches
and other vermin?
1221
00:50:49,553 --> 00:50:51,970
Yes.
Can we please see them?
1222
00:50:52,053 --> 00:50:53,178
Time-out.
1223
00:50:53,261 --> 00:50:55,679
Um...
1224
00:50:55,762 --> 00:50:58,512
I thought we were gonna be...
1225
00:50:58,595 --> 00:50:59,720
you know what I mean?
1226
00:50:59,804 --> 00:51:01,512
♪♪♪
1227
00:51:01,595 --> 00:51:04,387
Can you please explain to us
what's going on here?
1228
00:51:04,470 --> 00:51:05,970
♪♪♪
1229
00:51:06,053 --> 00:51:07,136
Well...
1230
00:51:07,220 --> 00:51:11,345
We have not been
around the poor before,
1231
00:51:11,428 --> 00:51:14,220
and we wanted Simon
to see how...
1232
00:51:14,303 --> 00:51:17,512
you people live.
1233
00:51:17,595 --> 00:51:19,512
We were hoping
you would demonstrate to him
1234
00:51:19,595 --> 00:51:21,887
destitution and suffering.
1235
00:51:21,970 --> 00:51:23,762
To motivate him
to work harder in school.
1236
00:51:23,845 --> 00:51:25,053
Mm.
1237
00:51:25,136 --> 00:51:27,178
Yes, so he will not end up
in a place like this.
1238
00:51:27,261 --> 00:51:30,095
♪♪♪
1239
00:51:32,053 --> 00:51:34,011
[knock on door]
1240
00:51:38,970 --> 00:51:40,804
Hi.
1241
00:51:40,887 --> 00:51:42,220
Sure, come on in.
1242
00:51:42,303 --> 00:51:43,887
[door closes]
1243
00:51:43,970 --> 00:51:46,804
- How'd you know where I live?
- Uh, you took the Audi.
1244
00:51:46,887 --> 00:51:49,345
I tracked the GPS.
1245
00:51:49,428 --> 00:51:52,303
[chuckles]
This place is a dump.
1246
00:51:52,387 --> 00:51:54,303
No wonder you're taking
my mom's handouts.
1247
00:51:54,387 --> 00:51:55,470
You come here to insult me?
1248
00:51:55,553 --> 00:51:57,053
No, I've given it some thought.
1249
00:51:57,136 --> 00:51:58,220
Given what some thought?
1250
00:51:58,303 --> 00:51:59,553
I've decided
1251
00:51:59,637 --> 00:52:02,095
we are going to the homecoming
dance together.
1252
00:52:02,178 --> 00:52:04,720
Julia, I thought I made myself
clear the first time.
1253
00:52:04,804 --> 00:52:06,387
Oh, no, you did.
1254
00:52:06,470 --> 00:52:08,887
But like I said,
I've given it some thought,
1255
00:52:08,970 --> 00:52:11,679
and I've decided we're going.
1256
00:52:11,762 --> 00:52:12,929
Okay.
1257
00:52:13,011 --> 00:52:14,136
No.
1258
00:52:14,220 --> 00:52:16,136
There is literally no way
1259
00:52:16,220 --> 00:52:18,011
I'm going to the homecoming
dance with you.
1260
00:52:18,095 --> 00:52:19,553
And you barging in here
like this,
1261
00:52:19,637 --> 00:52:21,303
it's kind of psycho, Julia.
1262
00:52:21,387 --> 00:52:22,929
It's a free country,
1263
00:52:23,011 --> 00:52:24,845
so you don't have to go.
1264
00:52:24,929 --> 00:52:26,345
But if you don't,
1265
00:52:26,428 --> 00:52:28,428
I am definitely
gonna tell my mom
1266
00:52:28,512 --> 00:52:30,178
that you went down on me.
1267
00:52:30,261 --> 00:52:33,428
Three--
no, four times.
1268
00:52:33,512 --> 00:52:35,845
[scoffs]
Is that psycho?
1269
00:52:42,136 --> 00:52:44,136
[gear shifter clacking]
1270
00:52:44,220 --> 00:52:46,345
[car door opens, closes]
1271
00:52:46,428 --> 00:52:49,303
Well, I can see--
1272
00:52:49,387 --> 00:52:51,053
ooh, and smell--
1273
00:52:51,136 --> 00:52:53,553
that you have been working hard
at sanitation.
1274
00:52:53,637 --> 00:52:54,720
Yes, sir.
1275
00:52:54,804 --> 00:52:55,970
You got five minutes.
1276
00:52:56,053 --> 00:52:58,136
My wife and I like
watching that singing show
1277
00:52:58,220 --> 00:52:59,261
with the spinny chairs.
1278
00:52:59,345 --> 00:53:01,303
It's getting ready to start.
1279
00:53:01,387 --> 00:53:03,261
Sir...
1280
00:53:03,345 --> 00:53:05,470
garbage is dirty.
1281
00:53:05,553 --> 00:53:07,845
♪ All the good things
about you ♪
1282
00:53:07,929 --> 00:53:10,428
♪ All the good things ♪
1283
00:53:10,512 --> 00:53:11,720
♪ About you ♪
1284
00:53:11,804 --> 00:53:15,303
♪ All the good things
about you ♪
1285
00:53:15,387 --> 00:53:18,470
♪♪♪
1286
00:53:18,553 --> 00:53:21,261
[cheers and applause]
1287
00:53:21,345 --> 00:53:22,553
We're Imperial Mammoth.
1288
00:53:22,637 --> 00:53:24,303
We're gonna take a break,
but we'll be back in ten.
1289
00:53:24,387 --> 00:53:26,011
[cheers and applause]
1290
00:53:26,095 --> 00:53:28,261
[Cole] That's some Beethoven
shit, am I right?
1291
00:53:28,345 --> 00:53:30,220
All right, sir, can I have
another one, please?
1292
00:53:30,303 --> 00:53:32,136
I'm gonna need, like,
ten more of these bitches.
1293
00:53:32,220 --> 00:53:33,970
Yes. Hey!
1294
00:53:34,053 --> 00:53:36,804
Look, I hooked up with him
once, and he moved in.
1295
00:53:36,887 --> 00:53:37,929
I didn't have a choice.
1296
00:53:38,011 --> 00:53:39,387
Now he won't go.
1297
00:53:39,470 --> 00:53:41,387
I was hoping,
since I got his ex here,
1298
00:53:41,470 --> 00:53:43,303
that maybe he'd
take him off my hands.
1299
00:53:43,387 --> 00:53:45,261
- Please, God.
- [laughter]
1300
00:53:45,345 --> 00:53:47,136
So, no, he's not my boyfriend.
1301
00:53:47,220 --> 00:53:50,178
He's dumb, he's rude,
he's politically ignorant,
1302
00:53:50,261 --> 00:53:52,512
he's violent,
he's socially inept.
1303
00:53:52,595 --> 00:53:54,095
I don't even think he can read.
1304
00:53:54,178 --> 00:53:55,887
And he's way too aggressive
in bed
1305
00:53:55,970 --> 00:53:57,011
and not in a good way.
1306
00:53:57,095 --> 00:53:58,929
All right.
1307
00:53:59,011 --> 00:54:00,303
You convinced me.
1308
00:54:00,387 --> 00:54:02,720
I'll take him off your hands.
1309
00:54:04,136 --> 00:54:05,970
Is this, uh...
1310
00:54:06,053 --> 00:54:07,929
this what you do when
you don't like somebody?
1311
00:54:08,011 --> 00:54:10,387
You bash 'em
behind their backs?
1312
00:54:10,470 --> 00:54:11,762
Get a good laugh
at their expense
1313
00:54:11,845 --> 00:54:13,178
with your fucking friends?
1314
00:54:13,261 --> 00:54:15,178
[Vampire Weekend's "This Life"
playing over speakers]
1315
00:54:15,261 --> 00:54:17,261
Try to pawn 'em off
to some other guy?
1316
00:54:17,345 --> 00:54:20,178
No, I--uh, I-I didn't--
I didn't m-mean that--
1317
00:54:20,261 --> 00:54:23,011
Byron.
Byron, come on.
1318
00:54:23,095 --> 00:54:25,720
I know exactly what you meant.
1319
00:54:25,804 --> 00:54:27,679
Unfortunately for you,
1320
00:54:27,762 --> 00:54:29,303
I'm not the kind of guy
who lets people
1321
00:54:29,387 --> 00:54:30,887
talk shit
about the man he loves,
1322
00:54:30,970 --> 00:54:33,220
so, uh--hey,
can you hold these for me?
1323
00:54:33,303 --> 00:54:34,804
- Sure.
- Thanks.
1324
00:54:34,887 --> 00:54:36,095
[grunts]
1325
00:54:36,178 --> 00:54:39,470
[blows landing,
people shouting]
1326
00:54:39,553 --> 00:54:40,887
Look at my man.
1327
00:54:40,970 --> 00:54:42,762
- Don't take no shit.
- Calm down.
1328
00:54:45,136 --> 00:54:47,720
I'm gonna do gymnastics
on that dick tonight.
1329
00:54:47,804 --> 00:54:50,804
I'm gonna Simone Biles that
dick, you know what I'm saying?
1330
00:54:52,428 --> 00:54:55,303
[blows landing,
shouting continues]
1331
00:54:55,387 --> 00:54:57,345
Hey.
1332
00:54:57,428 --> 00:55:00,345
[Ian grunting, panting]
1333
00:55:00,428 --> 00:55:01,679
[sniffs]
1334
00:55:01,762 --> 00:55:04,053
♪♪♪
1335
00:55:04,136 --> 00:55:05,387
♪ Oh, Christ ♪
1336
00:55:05,470 --> 00:55:08,804
♪♪♪
1337
00:55:08,887 --> 00:55:11,428
♪ Am I good for nothing? ♪
1338
00:55:11,512 --> 00:55:13,053
I love you,
1339
00:55:13,136 --> 00:55:14,470
Mickey Milkovich...
1340
00:55:14,553 --> 00:55:16,428
♪♪♪
1341
00:55:16,512 --> 00:55:17,845
...more than anything.
1342
00:55:17,929 --> 00:55:20,095
♪ Is always waiting
at the gate ♪
1343
00:55:20,178 --> 00:55:21,845
And if you'll let me,
1344
00:55:21,929 --> 00:55:23,679
I-I'd like to spend
the rest of my life--
1345
00:55:23,762 --> 00:55:26,470
Jesus Christ, save the fucking
speech, you pussy.
1346
00:55:26,553 --> 00:55:28,053
♪ And I was told ♪
1347
00:55:28,136 --> 00:55:30,804
I'll marry you.
1348
00:55:30,887 --> 00:55:32,345
Of course
I'll fucking marry you.
1349
00:55:32,428 --> 00:55:33,845
[grunts]
1350
00:55:33,929 --> 00:55:37,428
♪ The drums of war
beat louder warnings ♪
1351
00:55:37,512 --> 00:55:38,428
[door opens]
1352
00:55:38,512 --> 00:55:39,470
You're late.
1353
00:55:39,553 --> 00:55:40,762
You're early.
1354
00:55:40,845 --> 00:55:43,387
Just doing my part
to break stereotypes.
1355
00:55:43,470 --> 00:55:44,887
What's that smell?
1356
00:55:44,970 --> 00:55:46,845
The smell of a man saving
the city from corruption.
1357
00:55:46,929 --> 00:55:48,178
Ugh.
1358
00:55:48,261 --> 00:55:50,679
Since when does Lip
call family meetings?
1359
00:55:50,762 --> 00:55:52,387
Does anyone know
what two lesbians do
1360
00:55:52,470 --> 00:55:53,762
when they go to homecoming?
1361
00:55:53,845 --> 00:55:56,637
Do they both wear dresses?
Do neither wear dresses?
1362
00:55:56,720 --> 00:55:58,387
[Mickey]
Come on, man.
1363
00:55:58,470 --> 00:55:59,762
- Come on.
- Come on.
1364
00:55:59,845 --> 00:56:01,845
Yeah, that's go--
that's gonna help you a lot.
1365
00:56:04,136 --> 00:56:06,428
- [door opens, closes]
- what the fuck is that smell?
1366
00:56:06,512 --> 00:56:09,011
Carl's trying
to save the city.
1367
00:56:09,095 --> 00:56:13,095
Hey, everybody.
Uh, thanks for coming.
1368
00:56:13,178 --> 00:56:15,804
I wanted to tell you all this
in person.
1369
00:56:15,887 --> 00:56:17,053
What, you fall off the wagon?
1370
00:56:17,136 --> 00:56:18,470
- No.
- You going to prison?
1371
00:56:18,553 --> 00:56:19,804
What? No.
1372
00:56:19,887 --> 00:56:21,053
[Debbie]
Tami dumped you.
1373
00:56:21,136 --> 00:56:22,428
She's pregnant again?
1374
00:56:22,512 --> 00:56:24,178
Oh, she definitely dumped you.
1375
00:56:24,261 --> 00:56:25,970
No, will everybody
just shut the fuck up?
1376
00:56:26,053 --> 00:56:28,011
Listen, please.
1377
00:56:32,428 --> 00:56:34,303
Me, Tami, and Fred
are moving to Milwaukee.
1378
00:56:34,387 --> 00:56:35,970
♪ soft rock music ♪
1379
00:56:36,053 --> 00:56:40,011
Uh, her family gave us
an old house up there,
1380
00:56:40,095 --> 00:56:42,095
and, uh, it's--it's nice.
1381
00:56:42,178 --> 00:56:47,178
♪♪♪
1382
00:56:51,428 --> 00:56:54,053
It's only two hours away,
you know, and it's big,
1383
00:56:54,136 --> 00:56:56,970
so you guys can all come up
and visit.
1384
00:56:57,053 --> 00:56:59,512
And I'll still be around,
you know, on weekends
1385
00:56:59,595 --> 00:57:04,178
and, uh, holidays
and stuff like that, so...
1386
00:57:04,261 --> 00:57:09,595
♪♪♪
1387
00:57:11,345 --> 00:57:12,512
Anyway, that's it.
1388
00:57:12,595 --> 00:57:15,387
[quietly]
That's, uh...
1389
00:57:15,470 --> 00:57:17,303
[normal voice]
That's all I got, so...
1390
00:57:17,387 --> 00:57:22,637
♪♪♪
1391
00:57:38,178 --> 00:57:39,261
Who are you?
1392
00:57:39,345 --> 00:57:41,303
I'm your Uncle Frank,
1393
00:57:41,387 --> 00:57:43,887
and I'm gonna take care of you.
1394
00:57:46,053 --> 00:57:47,637
All I need in return
1395
00:57:47,720 --> 00:57:49,011
is for your parents
to make sure
1396
00:57:49,095 --> 00:57:52,303
Uncle Frank's commissary
account is nice and full.
1397
00:57:52,387 --> 00:57:53,762
I wouldn't smell it.
1398
00:57:53,845 --> 00:57:55,595
Just swallow.
1399
00:57:55,679 --> 00:57:59,512
♪♪♪
96462
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.