Original subtitles

(BIRD CHIRPING)

JOSH: Okay, um, we need to get some water.

ROSE: Oh, I forgot to fill my water bottle up.

No, you don't need to. There's meant to be a tank around here.

Oh, I'm sorry, Josh. I'm just a bit nervous about everything.

No, it's all right. We'll be fine. Let's do it!

I'm just afraid we might have forgotten something, that's all.

Nope.

ROSE: One, two...

One, two, three, four.

♪ Ooh, yeah ♪

♪ Oh, I'll be fine, yeah ♪

♪ Ooooh, ooh ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Oh, the good Lord knows it ♪

♪ Oh, the good Lord knows it ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ I've left better behind I'll be fine ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ May the mummy get another one ♪

♪ Fine ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

(SINGS INDISTINCTLY)

♪ I'll be fine... ♪

Ma! Ma!

You don't... Don't feel like you need to fill in all the quiet space, okay?

There's only five days of quiet space, okay?

Sorry, just try not to be the Donkey to my Shrek, yeah?

-All right. -Okay.

JOSH: Okay.

Ma, are you okay?

There's big hills coming.

Do you want me to take some of your stuff?

Ma.

Hey, Ma!

Ma, do you need a rest?

Ma?

I'm sorry, Shrek.

Just trying to give you some quiet space.

ROSE: What are you making?

-JOSH: Macaroni and cheese. -Ooh.

♪ Macaroni and cheese Yes, please ♪

♪ Macaroni and cheese What a tease ♪

♪ Macaroni ♪

(LAUGHS)

That's... That's beautiful.

♪ Mac is back With cheese, yes, please ♪

Do you remember when you were a scout?

Yeah, of course I remember.

Did you get your mac and cheese badge?

Ma, I got my camp cooking badge, yes.

Were you ever touched?

Pardon?

By a scout master.

No.

No, I was not touched. Why?

Just thought maybe you had but nobody ever asked you about it.

No, I was never touched.

I was never touched as a kid.

People don't generally like touching me.

Here we go about Patrick again.

(LAUGHS) No, we're not going about Patrick.

♪ Patrick, Patrick ♪

♪ What a prick ♪

♪ Patrick ♪

JOSH: ♪ You're a prick teaser ♪

ROSE: Actually, that's pretty clever.

JOSH: Yep.

Joshua, can you help your mother, please?

Yep.

You know why I wanted to come on this hike, don't you?

Um... After Ginger killed herself,

you couldn't stay in that hospital 'cause that's depressing.

But it's a horrible idea for you to be home alone.

So... Here we are in a creek.

Yep.

It's getting late. Let's keep moving like a shark.

Yeah. Okay.

JOSH: Stop it!

What are you reading?

History Of Sexuality.

-You're reading an erotic book? -No.

How much have you read?

Er, about half.

What's it about?

I have no idea.

(SIGHS) I don't know why she didn't tell me.

Okay, we're talking about Ginger, yeah?

I knew this would happen. I am prepared.

I thought we were friends. I just don't know why she didn't tell me.

I don't know. You didn't tell anyone when you did it.

-It's different. -How?

I didn't plan it. She planned it.

Okay.

She left me a note.

Okay.

I haven't read it.

Well, maybe the note will tell you why she didn't tell you.

Nah, she didn't want to tell me because she knew I'd stop her.

Yeah, well, wouldn't you have stopped her?

-Yeah, of course. -Yeah, so that makes sense.

It's just I would have thought that she'd want to be stopped.

You never really wanted to be stopped.

It was different.

Okay.

You know I'm sorry about when I tried.

Yep. I know.

Okay.

Okay.

It's okay to be angry if you want.

No, I don't want to be angry, okay?

I always assumed it wasn't about me.

(SOBS SOFTLY)

Morning!

Oh, God. How are you awake?

There's a side walk we can do today to a waterfall.

It's an extra seven kilometres.

Are they all drugs?

No wonder our packs are so heavy.

(SIGHS) Do you wanna go? It's a lot of walking.

-I don't mind. Whatever you want. -I don't mind either. It's up to you.

No, I don't mind. Do you feel up to it?

Just tell me what you want, Josh.

I want whatever you want.

Why can't you just tell me what you want instead of carrying on

like everything you do for me is a big, fat favour?

-I'm just trying to be easy. -Yeah, well you're being a shit.

All right, well, let's not go to the waterfall.

No! Let's not go to the bloody waterfall, then.

-Yeah, fuck the waterfall. -Yeah!

(LAUGHS)

ROSE: Have you ever wanted to try and kill yourself?

-JOSH: Oh, gosh. No, not really. -Never?

Um, there's been times where, like,

I didn't want to feel anything any more

and it seemed like a nice idea but,

all those times, they passed.

Oh, okay.

-Yeah. -So how'd they pass?

JOSH: Um, well, I don't know.

Maybe Everybody Loves Raymond came on.

Maybe someone offered me pancakes.

I love pancakes.

ROSE: But you never wanted to do any more than that?

Er, oh, once when I was 19, I wrote a suicide note.

-Oh, I'm sorry. -So...

No, I don't think that's a big deal, is it?

To want to kill yourself for an afternoon.

That's normal, as long as you don't actually try.

What did your note say?

Um, I can't remember.

Probably something very teen-angsty.

Oh, you must remember what it said.

(LAUGHS) Okay, fine, I remember, but I just, I don't want to reflect on it.

I don't really want to reflect on any of the decisions

I made as a teenager, to be honest.

What, like when you started dressing like Eminem?

(LAUGHS) Yeah.

Or that shirt. Do you remember that shirt you made?

And then you wore it.

It said, er... "Some people think that we only use 10% of our brains

"but I think we only use 10% of our hearts."

Our hearts.

Yes, insightful. It's an insightful quote.

I was an insightful teenager.

ROSE: Ooh.

(SOBS)

(FARTS AND LAUGHS)

Sorry!

I don't wanna talk about it.

Lucky we're not sharing the same sleeping bag.

-(CONTINUES LAUGHING) -I'm not listening.

JOSH: But you never have opinions on anything.

Like, I don't think I've ever heard you have an opinion on anything.

(SIGHS) There's too many opinions these days, Josh.

Everybody seems to think they have to have an opinion.

Okay, good, you have opinions on opinions.

(SIGHS) No, it's... I mean, it's fine if they want to have opinions.

And I do have opinions, by the way.

Okay.

Maybe you've just never heard them.

JOSH: Okay, well, let's play a game where I ask you about something

and you have to have an opinion on it.

-Yeah, okay. Yeah, I can do that. -Okay.

Uh... So, Mother, what's your opinion on Australian Idol?

Er, the judges are too mean.

Okay, in the first two seasons but they became, like, sickly nice.

(LAUGHS) I knew you didn't really want my opinion.

What about, er, God?

Oh, I don't believe in God but... I don't like it

when you go around telling people that he doesn't exist.

But he doesn't exist.

Why do you bother them?

Uh, well, the other day a Christian politician said that

God sent AIDS to kill gays.

I just think I'm allowed to rebut that.

Oh, well, that guy sounds like an idiot. You're allowed to bother him.

(CHUCKLES) Okay.

I just... Mostly I'm just surprised that God

couldn't come up with a better plan than AIDS, you know?

-It's not very efficient. -It doesn't just kill gays.

No, it kills a lot of Africans but, you know,

God is clumsy like that.

He's notoriously clumsy.

Also don't understand, like... They got AIDS in the '80s, you know.

It took God six days to make the universe

and that long to come up with AIDS?

Like, what was it about the '80s?

Think he saw George Michael and was like,

"No! (CHUCKLES) This shit has gone far enough. AIDS!"

I mean, not all Christians believe that.

It's just that one guy.

-Yeah. -Jesus was fine with gays.

Was he?

Yeah! Like, he hung out with all those blokes and drank wine and...

(LAUGHS) Washed...

Washed their feet.

-Is that a gay thing? -(CONTINUES LAUGHING)

Washing feet?

I've never washed a foot.

Is that what you think we do? You think we wash feet?

ROSE: Let's swim, Josh.

Oh, God, no.

It's freezing.

-I don't have any swimmers. -That doesn't matter.

You just go in your clothes. It'll clean them.

Ah, no!

That is freezing.

Come on! It'll be fun.

Nope, don't want to.

You are giving me the shits!

(SIGHS) I'm trying to have a nice time.

Yesterday, I was getting in trouble for doing activities

just because you wanted me to do them.

I just want you to want to do things.

I don't want to do the thing, you know?

I don't know how to want to do a thing I don't want to do.

I know how to lie about it.

You've told me not to do that.

(ROSE SHRIEKS)

-It's fucking freezing. -Mmm.

-Yeah, I said, right? -Shut up!

-I said, "It's freezing." -Shut up!

I'm really warmed up, Joshie.

Good. Good.

I'm gonna go to the other side, okay?

-Okay. -Okay.

-(SCREAMS) -What's up?

There's a snake, Joshie! There's a snake!

-Where? -Oh, God! He swam away.

Okay, good.

-Good. -No, no. It's in the water!

Yuck! Creepy.

-Well, how am I gonna get back? -I don't know.

You just have to swim. You just have to swim back.

No, I can't do that!

Joshie, can you come and get me? Please!

-How will that help? -I can't do it on my own!

Come on. Please.

If I get in there, it's just going to make a double-sized target.

Well, what do I do?

You just have to swim. You just have to swim back.

No!

Okay, uh, when I was a scout,

they told us that snakes were, like, scared of people.

So if you just make some noise you'll, like, scare it.

It'll piss off.

Go away!

-Go away, snake! Go away! -(CHUCKLES) No.

No, not like that. You need to, like... Like, on the ground.

-Jump and stomp or something. -Oh, Josh...

It's in the water!

Okay, fine.

I'll come in and scare the snake.

Oi! Snake!

Snake! Snake!

Does it help to hit it like that, Josh?

Yeah, sure. I learnt it in scouts.

(MUTTERS) Of course it doesn't fucking work.

All right, okay.

Snake's scared. Come in.

Oh, I'm too scared!

-Just fucking do it. -Don't you swear at me, Joshie!

All right.

Hey, get out of here, snake!

Snake!

Okay, what are you doing?

Keep going!

No, I can't! I'm too scared! I'm too scared!

Oh, shit! Okay.

(WHIMPERING)

-Joshie! Joshie! -Here, come on.

(LAUGHS) Let's go. Just go!

Jesus Christ!

You're my hero, you know that?

-Yeah. -You really are.

Yeah.

-Am I your hero? -Sure. Why not?

You're my hero.

ROSE: I don't understand how you never got angry with me.

I'm so angry at Ginger.

Fucking really stuck on this, yeah? Do you want me to get angry?

Do you wish I was angry?

I just wanna understand what's going through your head, Josh.

Er...

I just try and understand when you do things like this

that you're doing them because you're ill.

And then I don't get angry, the same way you wouldn't get angry

at someone with a cold for having a runny nose.

That's sort of un-feeling.

No... (SIGHS)

I mean, like, sure, sometimes I got angry.

Like, it seems like a pretty crazy way to get my attention

but also I promise my anger just never felt like a priority.

I wasn't trying to get your attention.

Really?

No, look, see, a psychiatrist I saw early on

asked me if I was trying to get attention.

That really surprised me.

What were you trying to do then?

(ROSE SIGHS)

I was trying to kill myself.

Oh, yeah. Of course.

I can't use attention if I'm dead, can I?

The third time you tried to kill yourself,

uh, there was, like, a day where we didn't know

if your stomach had been pumped in time.

If it had been pumped in time, they assured me you would be fine

but if it hadn't, you were going to die slowly over two weeks.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah...

You're my mum, yeah? Just...

Imagine if I had to watch you die slowly over two...

Watch you kill yourself over two weeks.

Of course, like, I was scared. I was fucking terrified but then,

then when I found out you were fine, then I got angry.

That was an angry day for me.

And sometimes, um, when I call you at 2:00 p.m. and you're still in bed,

not working at getting better, then I get angry then,

which I know is harsh because that's your disease.

It's very hard for you to get out of bed

but if we keep excusing it because it's your disease

then you're never gonna get better.

(WEEPING) I am trying to get better.

Sure, just don't do it again, all right?

Do you want some chilli?

Yep.

ROSE: Oops.

-I brought a little surprise. -Mmm-hmm.

-(LAUGHS) -Is that marijuana?

-Yes! I've always wanted to try it. -Where did you get that?

Tom! He rolled it for me, too.

He's such a nice boy.

I don't really smoke it.

Oh, it's all right, lovey. I don't mind.

I know you smoke it.

No, I don't. It makes me cough and it makes me scared.

-Aw, don't be such a pussy. -A pussy?

Yeah!

No, it's just, I'm worried we'll eat all the food, Mum.

We have rations.

Ha, extra chocolate. I thought ahead.

(SIGHS)

I don't know how that's gonna mix with your medication.

Jesus fucking Christ, Joshua.

I am trying to build a fucking bonding moment here.

It's just already so scary here.

All right, all right. We're gonna need some water.

(COUGHING)

What?

(LAUGHS) Nothing. It's nothing.

Here, don't hog it. Don't hog it.

So when do I start feeling high?

Er, nowish.

Oh, yeah!

Yeah! Mmm, that's good.

That's good.

All righty, no worries. Sudden, wasn't it?

I'm having fun, this is really fun.

Peer-pressured into doing drugs by my mum.

(LAUGHS) This really is fun, Josh.

Why did you and Patrick split up?

I don't wanna go over it again.

But you really liked him.

Yeah, I was so happy. My tummy felt so nice.

Sun was shining, you know?

Like, flowers were doing, like, flowery-type stuff.

Bluebirds were giving each other handjobs. It was good.

I don't get that.

What?

Um, why were they giving each other handjobs?

-It was a joke. -I don't get your jokes, Josh.

Yeah, I know.

You know, I can sort of see it from Patrick's point of view.

What?

Well, it's hard to imagine you having sex.

Yeah, good, you shouldn't be imagining it.

You're so bad at interacting with people when you feel self-conscious, that's all.

Suddenly, she has opinions. Lots of opinions.

You're always questioning things and...

And seeking approval.

I don't do those things when I'm having sex.

Wh... Once, I had to apologise but that was...

That was warranted.

What'd you do?

No... No, I'm not telling you.

Oh, I'm so sad, Joshie.

No! I'm just not gonna talk about it.

Oh, don't be such a baby.

I'm not a baby.

(MIMICKING JOSH) "I'm not a baby."

-I'm not a baby. -(MIMICKING) "I'm not a baby."

-I'm not a baby! -(MIMICKING) "I'm not a baby!"

-You're the fucking baby. -(MIMICKING) "You're the fucking baby."

ROSE: It's our last day tomorrow.

JOSH: Yeah, and we didn't see a Tasmanian devil or a wombat or nothing.

I'm really looking forward to the boat.

I'm looking forward to moving not with my legs.

ROSE: I'm gonna read Ginger's note tomorrow.

JOSH: What do you reckon it'll say?

ROSE: I don't know. It could be anything.

JOSH: Hope it's a treasure map.

Are you maybe bisexual?

No! Gosh, you've really kept your hopes up.

ROSE: Well, it's just that I never understood.

You dated Claire for so long.

-I just... Didn't know I was gay yet. -Well, what changed?

Um, I got older, you know? I got bored with girls.

And also at the time, I didn't want to be gay.

No one wants to be gay.

Geoffrey was so pretty.

He forced me to come to terms with it.

Well, did you enjoy having sex with girls?

Yeah, at the time.

Well, doesn't that make you bisexual, then?

No, that's a teenager.

Putting your penis anywhere when you're a teenager is fun.

Once, I tried to have sex with a watermelon.

-I wasn't fussy. -(LAUGHS)

I'm gonna go back to the mental home and get better.

Yeah, you have to.

Otherwise, they're gonna force you to stay in a public hospital.

Oh, okay. Yeah, that's a point.

-No, I want to. -Great.

That's... That's great.

I wasn't trying to hurt you when I attempted.

I didn't... It wasn't like Ginger. It wasn't planned.

Okay.

I hadn't been out of bed for two weeks.

I hated myself so much.

I just thought everybody would be happier if I was dead.

I was trying to do you a favour.

Oh, yes, that's... (SIGHS) Quite selfless of you.

(SCOFFS)

Ginger's note.

Okay.

Let's do it.

I thought we'd have a little ritual.

Like, I'll read it out and then we can burn it and just let it go

and keep moving like a shark.

Okay.

(SIGHS)

"Rose, you fat bitch...

(LAUGHS)

"Thanks for keeping me company. Take care of yourself, Ginger."

That's it?

-Yeah. -That is hardly closure, is it?

Nope.

No treasure map?

-Nope. -No.

We're not gonna get anything out of this.

ROSE: Hmm.

JOSH: All right.