Original subtitles

Perry: Leave a message.

I'll call you back.

hi, Perry, it's me,

Julia. Uh...

i-i just called to talk,

uh, obviously, ha,

but you're not there.

obviously.

uh, so...

basically, I just

wanted to say I'm sorry,

uh, about everything.

about making things

more difficult

than they needed to be.

I just, um...

I'd really like

to see you and talk.

this whole week's been...

I haven't even

been able to write.

I have to write this

stupid "tell us about

yourself" essay

for a scholarship

application.

I'm completely blocked

and-and...

can you pick up

if you're there?

ok, well, uh, mainly

I just want to know

that you're ok.

so...call me. Bye.

Bailey: Good job, buddy.

but you got some

test papers to

finish up, don't you?

for Ms. lo?

no...well, ok, I'll do it.

unh!

these 2 here?

atta boy.

oh, um, I have some

of Owen's pages here.

the-the testing center

was supposed to call

and confirm him for

this week. Did they?

no, not while I was here.

hmm.

you know what?

I should trade places

with Owen.

I'll take

his dyslexia test

and he can fill out my

scholarship application.

what is that,

the millennium thing?

yeah. They pick

5 area college students

and pay for room, board,

tuition for a year.

well, "filling out"

doesn't sound so hard.

it's an essay

on who you are,

and your philosophy

on the universe.

Bailey, it takes most

people, like, their life

to figure

that stuff out,

not 3 days and

"postmark by midnight."

you're on this thing

for 3 more days?

see, I was hoping

maybe we could...

go to the movies

or something, you know.

take Owen and claud

along with us.

not till I figure

out my entire future.

anyway, Claudia's

seeing, uh, Cody

every night, so-

she didn't tell me that.

she have to?

I mean, she's not

grounded anymore,

is she?

Bailey, maybe

you should give her

her space for a while.

yeah. Don't worry.

Claudia and I

are under control.

What did you do?!

ha. You look incredible!

really?

what did you do?!

wow! Red!

is that a rinse?

rapacious red.

oh, it was so easy.

can I have red hair?

no! No, you can't have

red hair! Claudia!

Claudia: I get I, bay.

you don't like it.

actually, you look...

what? Did Cody tell you

to do this?

did Cody tell me

to do this?

because I know you're too

smart to ruin your hair

for some idiot who's trying

to turn you into something

that you're not.

Bailey!

shut up, Bailey!

just shut up.

? Everybody wants to live ?

? like they wanna live ?

? and everybody

wants to love ?

? like they wanna love ?

? and everybody

wants to be ?

? closer to free ?

? closer to free ?

(Kirsten laughs)

that's it, Diana.

oh, I think

she's exceptional.

I think she's brilliant.

she was actually trying

to say the word "apple"

last night.

(imitates baby-talk)

"hopa"..."hopa"...

and that's "apple"

in what? Urdu?

I'm not listening

to you.

we're not listening

to him, are we?

'cause I think

you're brilliant.

if this were a nation

of one-year-olds,

you would be a leader

to your people-

like Hillary Clinton.

or Elizabeth dole.

can you tell what her

politics are just by

how she's lying there?

hey, this is your child

I'm admiring, mister.

kind of like ours,

right now.

dumb thing to say. Dumb.

no, I know.

I know that you

meant something nice,

but there's an actual

mother out there

whose baby Diana

really is.

so, yeah...

dumb thing to say.

I'm sorry. Really.

as long as you're

mine, anyway.

And she does love you.

and she feels you

loving her.

you know that, right?

I want to.

maybe a little.

Laa!

ohh.

hi.

hi.

sorry I'm late.

Thanks for calling me back.

this essay's been completely-

Julia...

I didn't come here to

talk about your essay.

right.

look, Perry, I'm sorry.

really, I am.

what happened with us was-

a mistake?

no.

I don't know.

come on, Julia,

you kissed me.

and you and I both

know that you're

not gay.

being gay has nothing

to do with it.

look, don't be

naive about this-

I'm not. I just...

look, I know I'm not gay,

but I don't think that's

what this is about.

then why'd you kiss me?

I don't know.

I just-i...

I love the way I feel

when I'm with you.

you know?

I love...Talking to you

and writing with you and...

even arguing with you

has had its moments, so...

I guess I got confused

and I kissed you

and I'm sorry...

not that it happened,

but that things got so

weird between us afterwards,

'cause if it weren't for you,

I wouldn't be writing again.

Julia-

I wouldn't be moving

on with my life.

but I haven't

done anything.

that's all you.

yeah.

when I'm with you.

and so that's

what I want now.

I want for us

to be friends again.

I want for us to drink

too much coffee

together,

and have these impossible

conversations and...

maybe even for you

to help me

with this stupid

scholarship essay.

Let me have it.

"Convince the stranger,

in the coming

millennium,

"you will bring into

the world something

that would not have been

there without you."

they take themselves

very seriously.

yes, I know.

Claudia:

I'm serious, Charlie.

you have to do something

about Bailey.

he's out of control.

Mr. control's

out of control?

I mean, correct me

if I'm wrong here, but you

are my legal guardian.

so he has no right

to tell me what to do,

or how to live,

or what time to come home.

that bad, huh?

Charlie, he's so set on

proving that he can do it all-

you know, do us all-

he's not even Bailey anymore.

well, he's under a lot

of pressure, claud.

yeah, well, we all are.

so you can either

get him off my back or...

get your couch made out

for me,

because if I have to spend

one more second under

his fat, little thumb...

well, number one,

you're welcome anytime,

and you know that.

but number two:

be patient with him, ok?

because he actually

needs you right now.

and somebody's gotta

keep an eye on him

or he's gonna need

a bypass by the time

he's 21.

ok?

will you do that for me?

as a personal favor?

you owe me.

big time.

you got it.

and, claud...

you look great.

thanks.

ok, picture this:

mountaintops, sunrise,

sonoma heights,

me in a pup tent,

and my laptop plugged

into the camper's friend

power source at the site.

I'm picturing.

I'm confused,

but I'm picturing.

Bailey, I've got

to get away.

I mean, if I'm gonna have

to deal with all these

deep "why are you here"

type questions,

I can't do it where...

where I spend

part of every day

looking for Owen's

lost homework.

or rolling up my socks

and putting them

in a drawer.

sonoma what?

heights.

it's where I went

for that-that dig

for geology.

god, that spot

is so beautiful.

I just keep thinking,

you know,

if can get back there

for just one day,

one night,

I could blast out

this essay

and finally hear

my own voice,

you know?

I'm still waiting

for the dumb part.

everything

you've said so far

is really smart.

oh, thank you.

(doorbell rings)

there's always

something.

I'll run 'em off

the property,

whoever it is.

Hey, Bailey.

Daphne.

how you doin'?

doin' good?

is-is Charlie home?

um...

(sighs heavily)

why don't you come in

and grab a drink or something?

I'll call around and see

if I can find Charlie.

no. Why don't you just

tell me where he lives?

Sarah! Hi!

Daphne.

hi.

um, look, does he still

teach at school?

yeah, sure.

ok, good.

then I'll just, um...

yeah, I'll just-

I'll catch him there.

you know what,

Daphne? Wait.

it's really nice

to see you two.

bye.

bye.

you didn't...

tell her that

Charlie's back together

with Kirsten?

I wasn't gonna just

drop it on her like that.

that's for Charlie to do.

he's gotta tell her

the way he wants.

what did she say?

did she say why

she was here?

yes. Can I please speak

with Mr. salinger?

and even if he's with his class,

could you please interrupt him?

a field trip?

swell.

hey, jule, wait up.

you ok?

no. It's bad enough

o'Neil wants me to rewrite

the story again,

but the notes

she gave me are crazy,

like she didn't even read it.

I did. I thought

it was great.

plus,

I've got this millennium

application essay to write.

when am I supposed to sleep?

maybe I'll just give o'Neil

the same version,

let her flunk me.

yeah, right.

flunk the best writer

in class?

aside from me,

of course.

whoa. Josh,

you have just said

10 supportive things

to me in a row.

why are you still

so nice to me?

you really wanna know?

uh-huh.

it's research

for a story

I'm writing.

yeah. It's about

this guy-

sort of unprepossessing,

neurotic,

but in a good way,

guy who's got a problem.

other than being neurotic?

yeah. See,

there's this woman-

this mysterious,

haunted, beautiful-

ok.

and he just can't stop

asking her out,

no matter how many times

she says no.

so my being nice to you

is pure research.

maybe it's not him

who's being neurotic.

maybe it's her.

you think?

well, it seems

she keeps going

for the wrong people.

I don't know why.

maybe 'cause she doesn't

think she deserves

someone that nice.

so what-what happens

in the end?

does he ask her out again?

well, it's your story,

but if I were him,

I'd pick her up at 7:00.

Just stepped off

a bus myself.

Daphne.

hey, you.

hey.

I know, I look awful.

I've been traveling

for, like, days,

and I haven't

gotten any sleep.

you look-you look fine.

what-what

are you doing here?

uh, well, I've been

to the house.

the house?

man: Mr. salinger,

half of these

inmates are yours.

oh, um, can you take

them inside with you,

Jeffrey,

just for 2 minutes,

please?

ok. Everybody,

let's go!

so, uh,

Bailey told me

that you're not living

at the house anymore.

but he wouldn't tell me

anything else.

uh, something going on?

where's Diana?

is she-

Daphne, look-

my mother died.

that's why

I was in Texas.

god, I'm sorry.

well, a lot of things

got clearer.

what I really want

got clearer.

and how dumb I was

for giving everything up.

that got a lot clearer.

and I kept thinking

about the 3 of us

and how happy

we really were.

daph...

actually, you

weren't that happy.

Jeffrey: Mr. salinger!

you know what?

I got a free period

in half an hour,

like, 25 minutes,

actually.

then I'll come out,

and we'll sit down-

something wrong

with Diana?

no, no, no.

no, I swear.

really?

yes, she's fine,

and you'll-you'll

see her right away.

(class bell rings)

ok.

that's the second bell.

I'm sorry.

um, half an hour, ok?

all right.

I missed you...

both.

(Noisy chatter)

you look incredible.

what?

I said, I'm glad

we're doing this.

oh, me, too.

Perry.

hey, guys.

hey, what are you

doing here?

oh, I'm just here

with some friends.

what about you?

we're kinda on a date.

just having dinner.

I'm gonna go get us

something to drink.

so...

are you and Josh,

you-and-Josh?

why?

no reason.

I just, uh,

I thought you

didn't like him.

I never said

I didn't like him.

no, but I

seem to remember

a definite lack of

interest on your part,

of any interest

whatsoever.

in fact, I think

I remember you saying

something like-

what's your point?

you don't let any

moss grow, do you?

Perry, what's

that supposed-

Josh:

here you go.

I should get back

to my friends,

and, uh, you kids

have fun.

Josh: We will.

jule,

you ready?

uh, yeah, ready.

canned corn.

cannot go camping

without canned corn.

park rangers spot-check

you for it when you

enter the grounds.

ok, I don't even

have enough room

for my laptop,

and that's kinda

the whole point.

ahem. Hey,

maybe you'll have

this lightning bolt

of inspiration

and just

Polish off the whole

application,

be home

in time to watch

the 10:00 news

in bed with me.

hmm, maybe.

but you know what?

i-i definitely think

this is the answer,

don't you?

I mean, going away,

peace and quiet, you know,

no distractions.

just focusing on

the task at-oh, Bailey,

don't-don't forget

Owen's appointment

with the psychologist.

got it covered.

tomorrow at 4:15.

good. Good.

I was saying something.

what was I just saying?

you were saying how

you were gonna focus on

the task at hand.

right. Exactly.

I mean,

it's not like I haven't

written a killer essay

before.

no kidding. You've

written a few for me.

right.

the only difference

is that when I was in my

killer-essay writing prime,

you know, I could just

shut the whole world out,

except for-is that

a mouse dropping?

what?

that! That

raisin-thingy. It is!

damn it!

the exterminator guy

was supposed to stop by

and check the traps,

you know, Tim, Tom, Ted.

oh, I'll call him

in the morning.

no, I will call

in the morning.

will you remember, Bailey,

or should I write it down?

Sarah, really.

Tim, Tom, Ted,

I got it covered, ok?

I'll take care of it.

ok, good.

I feel like I'm

forgetting something.

I'm telling you:

corn.

(telephone rings)

hello?

Charlie.

I told you, that's

all I told her,

and then she took off.

why, did she come by

the apartment or something?

here? No, I figure

she doesn't know

where here is.

no, I haven't

told her yet,

but I'm gonna

tell her right now.

ok, well, let me

know if she

gets in touch.

right.

isn't she cute,

all wet and

slippery?

let's keep you

all wet and

slippery.

let's just, like,

keep a spray can

of water

and squirt her

just so I can

towel her down.

Kirsten, listen, uh,

I don't want to make

too big a deal out of this,

but, uh...

wait, let me start over

because I think

this is a good thing.

ok, what's a good thing?

Daphne showed up today.

she's in San Francisco,

and she came to the school

looking for me.

well, what did she say?

what-what is she

doing here?

I was going to find out

everything.

I just had to drop off

my class and come back,

but she-she took off.

she does

want to see Diana.

i-i got that much.

wait, um,

see her or...

does she

want her back?

back? No.

does she

want you back?

Charlie, I have

a million questions.

this is our life we're

talking about here.

Kirsten, she doesn't

know about you and me yet.

ok, that's what I wanted

to have the time to tell her.

what did you mean,

this is a good thing?

well, just that

I did go down to L.A.

to get her back.

I mean, I always wanted

Diana to have her mother.

I mean-

you mean

her real mother.

Kirsten, no one can

take care of her-

I know what you mean

by that, Charlie.

you mean

her real mother.

why are we fighting

about this, ok?

we don't even know

what Daphne wants yet,

or even is she's

gonna stick around

or if she'll show up again.

no, we don't.

that doorbell

could ring now

or later on tonight

or a year from now,

and that's not

a good feeling, Charlie.

The tattoos come off

in, like, a week or two,

if you're hating them.

you didn't say anything

about my hair, either.

it's red.

I'm sorry. You know,

it's dark out,

I'm kinda colorblind.

you hate it, the hair

and the tattoos.

you're beautiful.

Cody, you really

like 'em?

not the hair

or the tattoos. You.

you don't have

to say that, Cody.

I can't help it.

ahem.

Cody, you didn't introduce me

to your little friend.

oh, hi.

hi, I'm Claudia.

wow, you're

all henna-handed.

big fan of Madonna's,

are ya?

our midnight set's up, Cody.

you should come watch.

please. Oh, please tell me

the midnight set's

starting early.

right on time.

ok, Bailey's gonna

actually kill me this time.

maybe if we hurry home,

I won't be that late.

ohh!

I'm...sorry.

you owe me a beer.

(knock on door)

(knock knock)

I want to know what you

meant by that statement.

oh, I'm sorry-

"you don't let any

moss grow, do you?"

that's what you said.

wait a second-

I want to know

what you meant.

look, I'm not gonna

have this conversation

out in the hallway, so...

what happened

with you and Josh?

nothing happened.

we had a fine time.

only the last hour

and a half of the date,

I wasn't even there.

I was totally in my head

wondering why you would

want to hurt me.

you think that's

what I wanted to do?

what were you thinking?

poor Julia?

poor pathetic Julia,

she's so desperate

and needy,

she'll go out with

a guy she doesn't like

just so she won't have to

spend the night on her own?

no, that is not

what I was thinking.

well, then what?

what? That I was

so freaked out

that we kissed,

that I'd throw myself at

the first available guy to

prove that I'm still straight?

no! Julia, look, what

do you want from me?

ok, because

whatever I do, I just-

I just can't seem

to get it right for you.

you want to know

what I was thinking

when I was looking

at you and Josh?

I was thinking,

"isn't that nice,"

you know?

wouldn't it be amazing,

if after all this time,

Josh and Julia might

actually be meant

for each other?

I don't think we are.

yeah, I thought

that, too.

and I also thought,

if you must know...

that Julia's in a hurry,

that's all.

in a hurry, yes,

for someone.

look, I'm not, uh,

I'm not good at this-

this people stuff.

I'm a writer, and

that's what I'm good at,

and I'm good at seeing

the writer in you,

and I do see one.

what does this

have to do-

however clueless they

are about everything else,

we know what's

inside of us.

and we know we can turn

inside of ourselves

to get what we need.

we have to.

you have to.

not to me,

not to anyone else,

but to yourself.

for a change, huh?

look...

it's not like

you don't need anybody,

like a friend or a lover,

we all do.

but just don't be

afraid of being alone.

I'm not. I'm-

because you

wouldn't be alone.

you'd be with

my friend Julia.

you can trust her.

she's the real thing.

Well, good night,

I guess.

sorry about all this.

hey, I'm the one

who took you out

for a date in

a parking lot.

so...

no, it was great.

I mean, I got to

meet your friends

and hang out with you.

and you gave me

the most amazing present.

I did?

well, you're about to.

Oh, no!

do you have any idea

what time it is?

you have any idea what

you sound like when you

speak to me that way?

what's the point of even

given you a curfew if you're

not gonna respect it, huh?

I couldn't have said it

better myself.

are you drunk?

are you high?

you are.

I can smell it.

did you get

her drunk, huh?

hey, man, look-

and you were driving.

how many did you have, huh?

leave him alone,

Bailey.

Claudia, go inside.

go inside!

I don't drink,

all right?

I can't,

so just back off.

just go home, Cody,

please.

I'll see you

tomorrow, ok?

you will not see him

tomorrow, Claudia.

Claudia, please listen to me.

I just don't think

you need to be making

a habit out drinking, ok?

no, it's not ok, Bailey.

just because you have

a problem with alcohol

doesn't mean I do.

yes, it does,

Claudia.

it runs

in our family.

Charlie's not an alcoholic,

Julia's not an alcoholic,

only you.

what is happening

to you, Claudia?

I don't even recognize

you anymore.

and out of all of us,

you and me...

you used to tell me

everything.

I was a good little girl,

wasn't I?

so what, so you

get your hair dyed

and you get tattooed

and-and all of a sudden

you think that makes

you a grownup?

because I got

to tell you, claud,

it's just the opposite.

you can tell me whatever

you want, Bailey,

but it's my life.

even at 16, there's nothing

you can do about it.

no, see, that's

where you're wrong.

don't threaten me, Bailey.

you're not my dad.

you're not even Charlie,

so stop trying to be.

I can take care of myself.

I've been doing that

for a while now.

Oh, excuse me. Hi. Can

I get a soda, please?

something very,

very caffeinated.

uh-oh! Curvy roads

got you dozing?

uh, I'm just

a passenger.

then I say kick-back

and take a snooze.

yeah, you wouldn't

say that if you had a

500-word essay to write.

look, the bus driver

said that I had to

transfer to another bus

in order to get within

walking distance of

the camper's station.

yeah, the grafton bus

will get you there.

it's gassing up

in the alley.

that'll be a dollar even.

oh, there you go.

do I have time for

a phone call?

mm-hmm.

thanks.

When did he say he

wanted to see Owen again?

ok, well, why don't you

wait till I get home to

make the appointment?

no, Bailey, it's just that

I know everybody's schedules

better than you do.

I am, too,

focused on my work.

in fact, I'm halfway

through my essay.

in fact, I am more

than halfway through.

hey, did you call

the exterminator?

Bailey...

oh! Yikes,

my bus is leaving.

yes, me, too.

I love you, too. Bye.

Hey.

oh, it's you.

hold on. I made a note

to myself about you.

I just want to make sure

I get this right.

uh, ok, here it is.

"note to self: Uh, don't

be a jerk about last night.

"ok, maybe she

cut it a little short,

"but the main thing is

you had a good time

and, uh,

she had a good time?"

yes, she did, very.

so the plan was,

when I saw you again,

I wouldn't complain

about the early hour.

I'd just say thanks,

and how about we do it

again tonight?

I'd like to, Josh.

I'm sensing a "but"

in there, a "but"

or a "however."

could we just-

could we keep it vague?

vague, like,

uh, tomorrow,

or vague

like the next day?

no, vague, more like, um...

septemberish?

uh-huh, I get it.

no, Josh, you don't

'cause you're angry.

and if you understood-

you did this to me

once before, Julia.

no, it's different.

really? It sure doesn't

feel different.

ok, well, maybe

the end result

is the same,

but this time,

it is not me

choosing another guy,

it's me choosing me.

wait, you're not gonna,

like, break into song

or something, are you?

you know how they say you

have to embrace the things

that you fear most?

what, like spiders?

well, for me,

it's being alone.

that's what I fear most.

I've never really

completely been by myself.

maybe it's got something

to do with my parents dying

and feeling so alone

and the only answer

was just to never be alone.

makes sense, I guess.

yeah. And that pattern

started and it never stopped.

look, each guy

I've been with

has sorta been the answer

to the one who came before.

it wasn't me choosing

so much as ricocheting.

and it could go

on and on like that

if I don't stop and say,

"hey, where am I in this?

"Julie. Me. Who-

who am I without all

these people around me?

who am I on my own?"

and I'm sorry, I really am

'cause I like you a lot.

yeah, well...

I want you to know

I'm not gonna...

I don't think

I'll be able to,

like, wait

around for you

to figure

all this stuff out.

no, I know.

I know that's a risk.

and what if I give up

someone really great

and let them slip away?

and the old me would

and the new me-

or the trying-to-be

new me kinda thinks

I have to.

ok.

I'll see ya.

(Knock on door)

I'm coming.

Uh, Charlie

lives here with you.

yeah. Um...

did he, uh...

um...

uh, come in.

uh, no, actually,

I got the, uh,

got the number

from the school.

and I had to make up

a bunch of stuff

just to get it

from them.

it's kinda

sneaky, I know, but

sometimes, you know,

you got

to improvise.

well, you left yesterday,

and Charlie wanted to

tell you.

that he'd

gone back to you,

is that what he

wanted to say?

Daphne, he didn't think

you were coming back.

she's so beautiful,

isn't she?

Charlie said,

but I had no idea.

I couldn't even picture.

um, do you

want to hold her?

um, you still

married to Paul?

no.

that happened fast.

um, Charlie told me

about your mother,

and, um, I'm sorry.

is that all he said?

just "Daphne showed up,

her mother died.

what do you

think about that?"

no, he thinks it's really

good that you're here

for Diana,

he does.

he's always wanted Diana's

mother to be around.

4 people.

that's how many there

were at the funeral,

and that's including me

and her idiot boyfriend.

imagine a life

that lonely, kirst.

I am not, um, entirely

comfortable here, you know.

I know. And you know,

i-i think that there's

a lot of things that

we should talk about.

that-that is what I remember

about being around you all.

everybody's talking

all the time.

you know, Charlie actually

had a psychiatrist for me

to talk to.

he just wanted

to help you.

you know what?

tell Mr. helpful...

(sighs)

ahem.

tell him that

I will be staying at

my friend Nick and Tina's.

it's a couple of friends of

mine that Charlie really hates.

I want to cry

when I look at her.

hey.

Daphne...

she's yours.

and I never,

for one second,

pretended that

she was mine.

who said anything

about that?

hey.

Here.

thanks.

(door closes)

I can't believe

how stupid I am.

ok, so you lost your laptop.

I don't wanna say

big daddy bigbucks

will buy you a new one,

but isn't that the truth?

that is so

not the point, Claudia.

I'd spent days and days

trying to figure out

what I was gonna

write about myself,

and I make a start-

no, more than a start.

I practically finish

the whole damn thing,

and then I lost it.

Sarah, you're gonna

start over.

you're gonna do what I do

when my computer crashes.

no! It is too late, ok?

I should just take it

as a sign,

a sign that I am not

supposed to apply for

the stupid scholarship.

Bailey: Hey, guys.

look what I got.

what did I tell you?

Mr. moneybags to the rescue.

Bailey, did you buy me

a new computer?

well, actually-

I told you not to do that.

I told you

it was not gonna help.

I lost everything.

I can't just go back

and remember it

when it took me all that

time to figure it out

in the first place.

did you not hear anything

that I said?

Claudia:

highly doubtful.

hey, will you

stay out of this,

please?

like you stay out of stuff

that has nothing to do

with you?

I'll see you later,

Sarah.

that's...

Bailey, that's

my old laptop.

yup. I made

some phone calls,

and they tracked it down

at that diner

next to the bus stop.

ta-da!

you're welcome.

Sarah, let me

label this for you:

joyous occasion.

what was lost

has now been found.

you just have to

hook this baby up

to a printer

and shazzam.

I can't do that.

you can't? Sure, you can.

where's the printer cable?

wait. Bailey...

I didn't write it.

I didn't write

anything.

but you said-

I know what I said,

ok? I lied.

I wasn't almost

through it.

I didn't write a word.

I couldn't.

well, ok, but you didn't

even have a chance.

by the time you'd arrived,

you lost your computer

so you had to

turn right around.

Bailey,

listen to me.

I can't write

this thing.

I have to answer

one simple question,

right?

who am I?

but if I have to

leave town and you

and my life

to figure that out,

what does that say?

that it's

really crazy here.

you needed some space.

you needed some time

to yourself.

do I? I mean,

is that what I want?

'cause I don't know

anymore.

I mean, I cant go

3 hours without

calling to check in

and make sure

that Owen's doctor's

appointment went ok

or that you

remembered to call

the exterminator.

that's because you love him

and you love me

and you take care of us.

so is that who I am?

sort of a mother,

but not really?

maybe a wife,

but not quite?

I mean, is that me?

'cause I don't know.

you know, maybe

I'm running away

from that.

maybe I'm afraid

to feel happy

in that role

because I'm 19,

and I feel like

I should want more

for myself.

Bailey...

maybe I can't

write this essay

because I know

exactly who I am,

and I'm just afraid

to say it out loud.

When I was in Texas,

I had this picture

in my head

about what was going on

back here.

you weren't living alone

and, uh,

still teaching,

and, uh...

happy enough, you know?

and I was thinking,

I was thinking

I can go back there

and I can make him

even happier

when I'm strong enough

and when I'm ready.

and that's why

you came back.

I know. What was I

thinking, right?

how totally off-base

of me that me coming

back here

would actually

make you happy.

daph...

time passed and,

you know, when it does,

stuff changes.

it's not that much time,

Charlie,

when you really

think about it.

ok, listen, you...

you gotta hear this, ok?

'cause, uh, Kirsten and me,

we're together.

and that's changed

too many times,

and it's not changing

anymore.

ok? That's it.

and I'm not telling you this

to hurt you.

I just...

I just want you

to know.

fine.

well, let's talk

about Diana.

good, good.

I want to because she-

because that is

the one thing

that I can look at,

and I can say,

"I did that."

and I haven't lost it,

and I haven't

screwed it up,

even though

I almost did.

but, um...

I'm back now and, uh...

and if it can't be

for the both of you,

then I am back for her.

and I'm glad, daph,

because I wanted her

to have her mother then,

and I want it now.

so however much

you want to be around her,

just tell us,

and...

us? Meaning

you and Kirsten.

Listen, just start by

coming by and spending

some time with her.

ok? Maybe tonight...

if tonight's good.

hey.

being helpful, huh?

might as well be.

writing, huh?

mmm. Failing to.

pretending to.

I just pushed the help key

to help me solve

my identity crisis.

sorry.

Claud.

what are you

doing here?

well, you see,

my boyfriend,

he's the bass player

in the doom patrol,

and I never miss

a doom patrol gig.

yeah, but

what about Bailey?

I thought

you were grounded

until...

I don't want you

to worry about Bailey, ok?

I'm not.

Julia: "You asked me

what I wanted from you,

"and the truth is,

you were right.

"I wanted too much,

"more than I had any right

to ask for.

"but somehow, you still

managed to give me

what I needed.

"you believed in me,

and more importantly,

"you made me want

to believe in myself.

"and for that,

I can't thank you enough.

your friend, Julia."

(cooing)

Daphne:

what is that? Shh...

(Diana fidgets)

Daphne: Is-is she hungry?

what time did she eat last?

I don't know.

Kirsten will know.

Kirsten?

Charlie: When did you

feed her last?

after dinner or...

same as always.

but that new

squash compote,

I don't think

it fills her up.

she wouldn't take

very much.

if you want to give her

a bottle...

you going out?

uh, to a movie, yeah.

have a good time.

Kirsten,

wait a minute.

a movie would be

a really good thing

right now, Charlie.

well...

don't see anything

we were gonna see

together.

together?

yes. Together.

I see what I see,

Charlie.

that's a family

up there,

you and Daphne

and your baby.

no. Listen to me.

I know

what you're feeling,

and I understand it,

but don't do it, ok?

because we talked,

and Daphne,

Daphne gets it about us,

all right? This is...

that is definitely not

what she's here for.

she is here for Diana,

and that is it.

I know you've talked.

then you know

that there's nothing

to worry about, right?

please. Please say

that you know that.

I can't say what

I don't feel, Charlie.

really, I just...

it's best if I go

for a while, ok?

I'll be back

in a couple hours.

ok.

ok.

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