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1
00:00:01,958 --> 00:00:04,091
This one's from me.The ribboning isn't my best --
2
00:00:04,134 --> 00:00:05,527
I have carpal tunnel.
3
00:00:05,570 --> 00:00:07,311
My new company is putting me up
at The Prescott,
4
00:00:07,355 --> 00:00:09,922
a luxury residence
with full amenities.
5
00:00:09,966 --> 00:00:12,142
I admit,
this extravagant lifestyle
6
00:00:12,186 --> 00:00:13,404
can make me
a little uncomfortable.
7
00:00:13,448 --> 00:00:15,624
Gentle, Marta!
8
00:00:15,667 --> 00:00:17,756
Another candle.
Thanks, everyone.
9
00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:19,280
Gloria:Alex, you should know
10
00:00:19,323 --> 00:00:22,413
that a crook worksat the hair salon downstairs --
11
00:00:22,457 --> 00:00:25,112
Adolfo of Venice.
12
00:00:25,155 --> 00:00:26,896
Isn't he the colorist
to the stars?
13
00:00:26,939 --> 00:00:29,159
Thank you for asking
even though I know you know.
14
00:00:29,203 --> 00:00:30,465
I hate him.
15
00:00:30,508 --> 00:00:35,078
Adolfo of Venice is actuallyAlan Carpman of Bakersfield.
16
00:00:35,122 --> 00:00:37,254
We started as hairdresserstogether,
17
00:00:37,298 --> 00:00:39,952
but he stolemy hair dye formula.
18
00:00:39,996 --> 00:00:41,998
For a family
of generally lovely people,
19
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:43,304
we sure have
a lot of rivals.
20
00:00:43,347 --> 00:00:46,089
You know what, it's been fun,
but it's time to go.
21
00:00:46,133 --> 00:00:48,526
You haven't even opened the
candle that Cam and I got you.
22
00:00:48,570 --> 00:00:50,224
And don't we get
a tour of the building?
23
00:00:50,267 --> 00:00:51,442
This place
has everything.
24
00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:54,489
Um, an archery range,
a shark tank, a --
25
00:00:54,532 --> 00:00:56,360
a Westworld?
26
00:00:56,404 --> 00:00:58,493
Sorry, I've gota huge project due.
27
00:00:58,536 --> 00:01:00,190
We can always
just explore on our own.
28
00:01:00,234 --> 00:01:02,149
Actually, you can't.
29
00:01:02,192 --> 00:01:04,368
There's a strict "no
unaccompanied guests" policy.
30
00:01:04,412 --> 00:01:06,109
I violate that,
they kick me out.
31
00:01:06,153 --> 00:01:07,893
I'll have the valet
fetch your cars.
32
00:01:07,937 --> 00:01:09,112
Oh, you can do that
from here?
33
00:01:09,156 --> 00:01:10,331
Yeah,
everything's automated.
34
00:01:10,374 --> 00:01:12,202
You just need
a resident ID code.
35
00:01:12,246 --> 00:01:14,117
[ Keypad beeping ]
36
00:01:14,161 --> 00:01:16,467
[ Beeping stops ][ Indistinct talking ]
37
00:01:16,511 --> 00:01:18,121
[ Beeping resumes ]
38
00:01:18,165 --> 00:01:21,124
--Captions by VITAC--
39
00:01:21,168 --> 00:01:24,127
Captioning Provided by
20th Century Fox Television
and ABC, Inc.
40
00:01:24,171 --> 00:01:26,869
and brought to you by Ford.
Going further, so you can.
41
00:01:30,177 --> 00:01:31,743
Bye, Phil.
Bye.
42
00:01:31,787 --> 00:01:33,136
All right, well,
I parked on the street,
43
00:01:33,180 --> 00:01:34,703
so I'll just
meet you at home.
44
00:01:34,746 --> 00:01:36,313
-Bye, Claire.
-I need to run to the mall.
45
00:01:36,357 --> 00:01:38,185
Would you pick up somesteaks from the farmersmarket for tonight?
46
00:01:38,228 --> 00:01:39,969
Oh, so you did remember
it's date night.
47
00:01:40,012 --> 00:01:41,797
I was a little worried
after your response
to my Paperless Post.
48
00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:43,146
Oh, come on.
49
00:01:43,190 --> 00:01:45,409
You know my maybesalways turn into will attends.
50
00:01:45,453 --> 00:01:46,280
[ Chuckling ]
Okay.
51
00:01:46,323 --> 00:01:47,759
Aww.
52
00:01:47,803 --> 00:01:49,152
When was the last timethat you and I
53
00:01:49,196 --> 00:01:51,720
cooked a romantic dinnertogether?
54
00:01:51,763 --> 00:01:53,374
We did it last week.
55
00:01:53,417 --> 00:01:57,987
I'm not talking about sprinklinghot dog slices on a DiGiorno's.
56
00:01:58,030 --> 00:02:00,337
[ Tires squeal ]
57
00:02:00,381 --> 00:02:03,079
You couldn't bring my carbefore I got in trouble?
58
00:02:06,343 --> 00:02:07,083
[ Tires squeal ]
59
00:02:08,389 --> 00:02:10,260
Thank you.
60
00:02:10,304 --> 00:02:11,653
[ Keypad beeps,
computer chirps ]
61
00:02:13,394 --> 00:02:15,178
Phil:I've been secretly moonlightingas an online food blogger,
62
00:02:15,222 --> 00:02:16,788
"Foodie in a Hoodie" --
63
00:02:16,832 --> 00:02:18,181
it rhymes on the page.
64
00:02:18,225 --> 00:02:20,879
I've quickly developed
a huge following,
65
00:02:20,923 --> 00:02:23,360
and The Prescott is home to
the city's hottest restaurant,
66
00:02:23,404 --> 00:02:24,405
called Pardon.
67
00:02:24,448 --> 00:02:25,580
Hello.
68
00:02:25,623 --> 00:02:27,277
[ British accent ]
Ah, good day, sir.
69
00:02:27,321 --> 00:02:28,191
Forgive me.
I'm new here.
70
00:02:28,235 --> 00:02:30,062
Still getting to knoweach of the tenants.
71
00:02:30,106 --> 00:02:31,412
I'm your concierge,
Higgins.
72
00:02:31,455 --> 00:02:33,762
You look so familiar.
Have we met?
73
00:02:33,805 --> 00:02:35,198
'Fraid not, no.
74
00:02:35,242 --> 00:02:36,330
I do get that a lot,
though.
75
00:02:36,373 --> 00:02:38,636
I havean everyman face and body.
76
00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:41,683
[ Whirring ]
77
00:02:41,726 --> 00:02:43,250
[ Whispering ]
They're rising.
78
00:02:43,293 --> 00:02:45,034
Ah, yes, Finley.
79
00:02:45,077 --> 00:02:46,383
Patrols the building
for non-residents
80
00:02:46,427 --> 00:02:48,820
using a motion sensorand face scanner.
81
00:02:48,864 --> 00:02:52,215
Useful, yes, but does he havethat uniquely human ability
82
00:02:52,259 --> 00:02:54,348
to anticipatea person's every need?
83
00:02:54,391 --> 00:02:55,392
Coconut water?
84
00:02:55,436 --> 00:02:57,829
I didn't even know
I wanted this!
85
00:02:57,873 --> 00:02:59,266
Finley, away![ Finley beeps ]
86
00:02:59,309 --> 00:03:00,615
Anything elseI can help you with, sir?
87
00:03:00,658 --> 00:03:02,269
Uh...no.
88
00:03:02,312 --> 00:03:04,271
I'm just headed down
to the restaurant.
89
00:03:04,314 --> 00:03:05,576
[ French accent ]
Pardon?
90
00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:07,448
Your...in-house eatery.
91
00:03:07,491 --> 00:03:08,405
Pardon?
92
00:03:08,449 --> 00:03:11,930
You know -- uh, waiters,
cutlery, daily specials.
93
00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:13,280
I think it's called
Pardon.
94
00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:14,890
Of course. My mistake.It's all right.
95
00:03:14,933 --> 00:03:16,108
Right this way.
96
00:03:16,152 --> 00:03:18,067
Avoiding the security robot
would be tricky,
97
00:03:18,110 --> 00:03:19,242
but Finley had a weakness --
98
00:03:19,286 --> 00:03:21,288
he can only detect people
if they're moving.
99
00:03:21,331 --> 00:03:22,506
And it was worth the risk --
100
00:03:22,550 --> 00:03:24,421
Pardon claimed to have
the world's best beef slider,
101
00:03:24,465 --> 00:03:26,510
and my -- my followers
are dying for a review.
102
00:03:26,554 --> 00:03:28,338
Well, all but one.
103
00:03:28,382 --> 00:03:30,471
I have a troll.
104
00:03:30,514 --> 00:03:33,865
Screen name "Close to Utlaw,"
wherever that is.
105
00:03:33,909 --> 00:03:36,520
We recently got into a --
a heated comment war.
106
00:03:36,564 --> 00:03:40,263
Insults were hurled,
mothers disparaged.
107
00:03:40,307 --> 00:03:42,352
Who knew the Internet
could be so negative?
108
00:03:42,396 --> 00:03:44,441
Table for one.
I live here.
109
00:03:44,485 --> 00:03:45,747
Something just opened up.
110
00:03:45,790 --> 00:03:48,532
Great, lead the way.I live here.
111
00:03:48,576 --> 00:03:52,319
[ Keypad beeps,
computer chirps ]
112
00:03:52,362 --> 00:03:53,711
[ Light music plays]
113
00:03:53,755 --> 00:03:55,322
Hi.
Uh, I'm new here.
114
00:03:55,365 --> 00:03:57,106
Could you lead me
to the screening room?
115
00:03:57,149 --> 00:03:58,325
I should think so.
116
00:03:58,368 --> 00:04:00,892
At the butler academy,I led my class in leading.
117
00:04:00,936 --> 00:04:02,372
This way.
118
00:04:02,416 --> 00:04:04,505
Recently, I got
a special edition Blu-ray
119
00:04:04,548 --> 00:04:07,551
of the best movie ever made,
"Lawrence of Arabia."
120
00:04:07,595 --> 00:04:09,205
Word is, The Prescott has
121
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:12,339
a state-of-the-art screening
room with surround sound.
122
00:04:12,382 --> 00:04:13,296
Know what it doesn't have?
123
00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:14,645
Manny.
124
00:04:14,689 --> 00:04:17,126
Hello! I would've gonewith a tracking shot there.
125
00:04:17,169 --> 00:04:18,910
[ Dramatic music plays]
126
00:04:18,954 --> 00:04:20,912
I sure hope he finds a plotout there in that desert.
127
00:04:23,001 --> 00:04:25,221
Behold,our famous candy wall.
128
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,441
Hey, Sugar Babies.
129
00:04:27,484 --> 00:04:29,181
Yes, honey buns?No, Sugar Babies.
130
00:04:29,225 --> 00:04:31,227
The greatest movie candy
of all time.
131
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:32,576
A thousand apologies.
132
00:04:32,620 --> 00:04:34,404
I will track some down for you
straight away.
133
00:04:34,448 --> 00:04:35,884
You wouldn't mind?
Mind? Please.
134
00:04:35,927 --> 00:04:37,189
There is no greater joy
135
00:04:37,233 --> 00:04:39,104
than fetching something
I've never heard of
136
00:04:39,148 --> 00:04:40,323
for someone
I've only just met.
137
00:04:44,588 --> 00:04:45,546
May I help you
with something?
138
00:04:45,589 --> 00:04:48,026
Oh. Uh, no, I'm just --
I'm waiting for someone.
139
00:04:48,070 --> 00:04:50,464
And his name is David Beckham.
140
00:04:50,507 --> 00:04:52,596
Resident at The Prescott.
141
00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:53,597
Okay, Mitchell hates it
when I do this,
142
00:04:53,641 --> 00:04:55,207
but every time
I meet a celebrity,
143
00:04:55,251 --> 00:04:57,427
I ask them to record
my outgoing message.
144
00:04:57,471 --> 00:05:00,125
My current one is from when
I saw Snoop Dogg at a bank.
145
00:05:00,169 --> 00:05:02,214
Cameron: Sorry I missed you.
As you can see --
146
00:05:02,258 --> 00:05:03,564
Snoop Dogg: I'm busy!
147
00:05:03,607 --> 00:05:04,434
And sometimes things can --
148
00:05:04,478 --> 00:05:06,131
Get away from me!
149
00:05:06,175 --> 00:05:07,698
Please leave a message,
including your phone number,
150
00:05:07,742 --> 00:05:09,439
just for -- Security!
151
00:05:09,483 --> 00:05:10,919
[ Cellphone rings ]
152
00:05:10,962 --> 00:05:12,921
Hey, sweetie, what's up?I'm -- I'm kind of busy.
153
00:05:12,964 --> 00:05:14,488
Mitchell: Cam, I'm hurt.
It's my leg.
154
00:05:14,531 --> 00:05:15,402
What?
155
00:05:15,445 --> 00:05:16,968
I slipped
in the food court,
156
00:05:17,012 --> 00:05:19,449
and I'm all sticky and tweens are laughing at me.
157
00:05:19,493 --> 00:05:20,494
You have to
come pick me up.
158
00:05:20,537 --> 00:05:22,583
Well, that sounds awful,but -- [ Sighs ]
159
00:05:22,626 --> 00:05:24,411
Isn't --Isn't Claire closer?
160
00:05:24,454 --> 00:05:26,413
Well, you're at the farmers
market right down the street.
161
00:05:26,456 --> 00:05:28,066
Okay, fine.
I'm on my way.
162
00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:29,459
[ Cellphone beeps ]
163
00:05:29,503 --> 00:05:31,287
Aww, you're the best.
164
00:05:31,331 --> 00:05:33,245
I was not gonna let Cam
ruin my chance
165
00:05:33,289 --> 00:05:37,293
to thank my wallpaper,
Victoria Beckham, one-on-one.
166
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,077
Okay, so, it was 1997.
167
00:05:39,121 --> 00:05:40,383
I was in Detroit
168
00:05:40,427 --> 00:05:42,385
for a Spice Girls concert
with my girlfriend.
169
00:05:42,429 --> 00:05:44,387
I was going to propose to her,
170
00:05:44,431 --> 00:05:46,520
had the ring in my pocket
and everything,
171
00:05:46,563 --> 00:05:50,045
when from the stage, Posh lookedright at me and said,
172
00:05:50,088 --> 00:05:52,656
[ British accent ]"Be true to yourself, Mitchell!"
173
00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:54,528
[ Normal voice ] Okay, you know,
she might've said "Michigan,"
174
00:05:54,571 --> 00:05:56,225
but she was looking right at me!
175
00:05:56,268 --> 00:05:59,315
She inspired me
to come out that night.
176
00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:01,578
I had that diamond reset
as an anklet charm,
177
00:06:01,622 --> 00:06:03,537
and I was off to the races.
[ Chuckles ]
178
00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:05,626
What kind of gym bag
is that, anyway?
179
00:06:05,669 --> 00:06:08,672
It's a satchel,you ignorant sneeze.
180
00:06:08,716 --> 00:06:10,761
You have been
so unpleasant lately.
181
00:06:10,805 --> 00:06:12,459
On a definitely related note,
182
00:06:12,502 --> 00:06:14,852
Manny hasn't gotten any action
in months.
183
00:06:14,896 --> 00:06:17,899
Well, other thanwhatever gave him carpal tunnel.
184
00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:21,076
Luckily, The Prescott has
an '80s aerobi-cise class,
185
00:06:21,119 --> 00:06:24,122
which will be
full of single older ladies.
186
00:06:24,166 --> 00:06:26,124
Women hit a sweet spot
right after 40
187
00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:27,691
where they still look great
188
00:06:27,735 --> 00:06:29,432
but their standards
have lowered.
189
00:06:29,476 --> 00:06:31,826
[ Dance music plays]
190
00:06:31,869 --> 00:06:33,436
You're in pretty good shapefor someone who's...
191
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:35,220
42? 43?
192
00:06:35,264 --> 00:06:36,570
I'm 38.
193
00:06:36,613 --> 00:06:38,310
Bye.
194
00:06:39,268 --> 00:06:40,791
Higgins.
195
00:06:40,835 --> 00:06:42,445
Oh, Mr. Beckham.
Apologies.
196
00:06:42,489 --> 00:06:44,229
Blind as a batwithout these bad boys.
197
00:06:44,273 --> 00:06:47,624
So, myself and Courteney areexpecting a bowling instructor.
198
00:06:47,668 --> 00:06:50,235
Would you have him
meet us downstairs at
the bowling alley, please?
199
00:06:50,279 --> 00:06:51,541
You and Ms. Cox
getting an edge
200
00:06:51,585 --> 00:06:52,586
for this weekend'scelebrity bowl-a-thon?
201
00:06:52,629 --> 00:06:54,152
Oh, we'll need it.
202
00:06:54,196 --> 00:06:55,937
You should've seen
the way he bowled last year.
203
00:06:55,980 --> 00:06:58,374
I mean, it isto raise money
for charity.
204
00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:01,290
Yeah, a dollar for
each of the 18 pins
that you knocked down.
205
00:07:01,333 --> 00:07:03,510
Thanks to you,
Doctors Without Borders
206
00:07:03,553 --> 00:07:05,294
are now Doctors
Without Malaria Pills.
207
00:07:05,337 --> 00:07:06,513
A bit harsh.
208
00:07:06,556 --> 00:07:08,602
[ Elevator bell dings ]
209
00:07:14,999 --> 00:07:16,697
Did you see the two friends
in the back?
210
00:07:16,740 --> 00:07:18,699
The blond one liked me, and thebrunette kept staring at you.
211
00:07:18,742 --> 00:07:19,874
Can you blame her?
212
00:07:19,917 --> 00:07:21,789
No one movesto "Caribbean Queen" like me.
213
00:07:23,181 --> 00:07:25,923
Ah, just who I was toldto be on the lookout for.
214
00:07:25,967 --> 00:07:28,404
A certain couple haveasked that you meet themin the bowling alley.
215
00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:29,971
Was it a blonde
and a brunette?
216
00:07:30,014 --> 00:07:32,669
Indeed, and they seemed eagerto get rolling.
217
00:07:33,627 --> 00:07:34,628
Bowling alley?
218
00:07:34,671 --> 00:07:35,933
These girls are freaky.
219
00:07:37,195 --> 00:07:38,675
Hair salon?
220
00:07:38,719 --> 00:07:40,895
Just off the courtyard
to your right.Thank you.
221
00:07:40,938 --> 00:07:42,636
I've always wanted
to dye my hair dark.
222
00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:44,551
But there's only one colorist
I would trust to do it --
223
00:07:44,594 --> 00:07:46,988
Adolfo of Venice.
224
00:07:47,031 --> 00:07:48,729
Gloria's sworn enemy.
225
00:07:48,772 --> 00:07:51,122
I just have to sneak back in
and do it without her knowing.
226
00:07:51,166 --> 00:07:52,559
[ Beep, beep ]Oh!
227
00:07:53,821 --> 00:07:55,779
[ Beep, computer chirps ]
228
00:08:02,046 --> 00:08:03,657
[ FaceTime ringing ]
229
00:08:03,700 --> 00:08:04,919
Alex: Hi, Mom.
230
00:08:04,962 --> 00:08:06,529
Hi, Alex.
Hey, honey.
231
00:08:06,573 --> 00:08:08,183
So,
how's the project going?
232
00:08:08,226 --> 00:08:10,315
I'm never gonna make this deadline.
233
00:08:10,359 --> 00:08:12,535
Oh, yeah, no, that --
that -- that's tough...
234
00:08:12,579 --> 00:08:13,797
I'm sorry --
sorry to hear that.
235
00:08:13,841 --> 00:08:15,886
Work is so stressful.[ Beep, computer chirps ]
236
00:08:15,930 --> 00:08:17,192
I'm glad you called, I'm actually --Yeah, got to go,
love you! Bye!
237
00:08:17,235 --> 00:08:18,541
[ Cellphone beeps ]
238
00:08:18,585 --> 00:08:19,542
The pool?
239
00:08:19,586 --> 00:08:21,152
Just hop on the elevator
240
00:08:21,196 --> 00:08:23,198
and press the big buttonmarked "pool."
241
00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:26,810
I am known as the fearless one
of the family.
242
00:08:26,854 --> 00:08:28,595
So, when Claire gave us all
free passes
243
00:08:28,638 --> 00:08:31,162
for the Fun Town Water Park
next week,
244
00:08:31,206 --> 00:08:34,383
I couldn't admit
that I am afraid of slides.
245
00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:38,169
They go so fast, I feel like
I'm going to fly off.
246
00:08:38,213 --> 00:08:41,825
I just need to try it once
and I am going to be fine.
247
00:08:41,869 --> 00:08:44,393
I cannot do it!
248
00:08:44,436 --> 00:08:45,568
Hey, no backsies!
249
00:08:45,612 --> 00:08:46,787
[ Groans ]
250
00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:47,701
[ Breathing heavily ]
251
00:08:47,744 --> 00:08:50,660
Okay, here I go!
252
00:08:50,704 --> 00:08:54,272
[ Screams ]
253
00:08:54,316 --> 00:08:56,710
You should have let me
do backsies!
254
00:08:58,755 --> 00:09:01,715
[ Tablet chimes ]Female voice:
Resident ID access --
hair salon.
255
00:09:01,758 --> 00:09:04,021
What? Who's using my code?!
[ Scoffs ]
256
00:09:05,849 --> 00:09:08,460
[ Bad Italian accent ] You
a-look like that a-actress...
257
00:09:08,504 --> 00:09:11,289
Audrey Hepburn.
258
00:09:11,333 --> 00:09:13,030
[ Telephone rings ]
259
00:09:14,858 --> 00:09:16,730
[ Line ringing]
260
00:09:16,773 --> 00:09:18,775
This is Phil Dunphy.
Leave a message.[ Beep]
261
00:09:18,819 --> 00:09:21,517
Phil, I have a little surprise
for you later.
262
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:24,955
Let's just say I know
how much you love brunettes.
263
00:09:24,999 --> 00:09:26,566
Here's a menu for you.Thank you.
264
00:09:27,828 --> 00:09:31,440
And for my followers...
265
00:09:31,483 --> 00:09:32,789
an Instagram tease.
266
00:09:32,833 --> 00:09:34,617
[ Camera clicks ]
267
00:09:34,661 --> 00:09:35,749
[ Footsteps approach ]
268
00:09:35,792 --> 00:09:37,098
Your Sugar Babies, sir.
269
00:09:37,141 --> 00:09:38,621
I hope it wasn't
too much trouble.
270
00:09:38,665 --> 00:09:40,405
On the contrary.
271
00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:42,016
There was a Mexican
birthday celebration
272
00:09:42,059 --> 00:09:44,061
taking place in the park
across the street.
273
00:09:44,105 --> 00:09:45,759
I waited for the crack
of the piñata,
274
00:09:45,802 --> 00:09:47,543
mixed in seamlessly
with the children,
275
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,023
and pounced.
276
00:09:50,894 --> 00:09:52,069
[ Groans ][ Cellphone chimes ]
277
00:09:54,506 --> 00:09:55,769
He's here?!
278
00:09:55,812 --> 00:09:57,901
Some moron food blogger
took a shot
279
00:09:57,945 --> 00:09:59,120
at one of my favorite spots.
280
00:09:59,163 --> 00:10:02,253
So I go after him usingmy screen name, "Closet Outlaw."
281
00:10:02,297 --> 00:10:05,909
It escalates, and he turns his
army of followers against me.
282
00:10:05,953 --> 00:10:07,868
As I wrote in my last comment --
283
00:10:07,911 --> 00:10:10,697
"Let's see how well
my fist pairs with your face."
284
00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:11,741
[ Sighs ]
285
00:10:11,785 --> 00:10:12,655
[ Tablet chimes ]
286
00:10:12,699 --> 00:10:14,309
The bowling alley?!
287
00:10:14,352 --> 00:10:15,136
[ Laptop slams ]
288
00:10:17,704 --> 00:10:18,879
Alex is here?!
289
00:10:18,922 --> 00:10:20,489
If she sees us,she'll throw us out.
290
00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:23,057
Excuse me.
291
00:10:24,362 --> 00:10:26,277
If that blonde and brunette
come by,
292
00:10:26,321 --> 00:10:27,844
could you tell them
there's a new meet-up spot?
293
00:10:27,888 --> 00:10:29,498
The hot tubs
on the rooftop.
294
00:10:29,541 --> 00:10:31,848
Of course, warm things up a bitbefore your workout.
295
00:10:31,892 --> 00:10:33,284
If there's nothing else,I need to make sure
296
00:10:33,328 --> 00:10:35,156
these balls are markedwith their correct weights.
297
00:10:39,073 --> 00:10:40,204
[ Scoffs ]
298
00:10:41,728 --> 00:10:42,337
Hi.
299
00:10:42,380 --> 00:10:43,730
Size 10 for him
300
00:10:43,773 --> 00:10:46,254
and anything with a steel toe
for me.
301
00:10:46,297 --> 00:10:47,690
Someone drops his ball
a lot.
302
00:10:47,734 --> 00:10:48,735
There has been
a change of plan.
303
00:10:48,778 --> 00:10:50,562
Your bowling instructorwould now like you to meet him
304
00:10:50,606 --> 00:10:52,521
in the hot tubs
for a warmup first.
305
00:10:52,564 --> 00:10:53,740
Meet you up there?
Yep.
306
00:10:53,783 --> 00:10:56,525
If you're calling the charity
for a new partner,
307
00:10:56,568 --> 00:10:57,613
it's not gonna work.
308
00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:58,962
They already
made the posters.
309
00:10:59,006 --> 00:11:01,530
Ready to order?
Very.
310
00:11:01,573 --> 00:11:04,272
I came to this restaurant forone thing and one thing only.
311
00:11:04,315 --> 00:11:06,927
[ Finley whirring ]
312
00:11:06,970 --> 00:11:10,495
[ Scanner clicking ]
313
00:11:10,539 --> 00:11:12,149
And that thing is...?
314
00:11:12,193 --> 00:11:13,847
Sorry.Uh, one of your world fa--
315
00:11:13,890 --> 00:11:16,719
[ Whirring, clicking ]
316
00:11:16,763 --> 00:11:18,199
One of our world's
fattest hot dogs coming up.
317
00:11:18,242 --> 00:11:19,983
No!
The -- The slider.
318
00:11:20,027 --> 00:11:21,158
And how would
you like it?
319
00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:22,159
Me...
320
00:11:22,203 --> 00:11:23,987
[ Whirring, clicking ]
321
00:11:24,031 --> 00:11:26,207
Yes, you, sir....dium rare.
322
00:11:26,250 --> 00:11:27,730
And can you have it deliveredto the pool, please?
323
00:11:27,774 --> 00:11:29,166
Of course.[ Watch chimes ]
324
00:11:31,212 --> 00:11:32,779
Okay, that slider
goes to the pool,[ Watch chimes ]
325
00:11:32,822 --> 00:11:35,390
and it looks like we need one
for Mr. Beckham to the roof.
326
00:11:35,433 --> 00:11:37,131
You seen a guy
in a black hoodie?
327
00:11:37,174 --> 00:11:37,958
Just left.Thanks.
328
00:11:38,001 --> 00:11:39,655
Oh, I'll be back.
329
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:41,788
I'm dying to try one ofyour world's fattest hot dogs.
330
00:11:41,831 --> 00:11:43,964
[ Horn honks ]
331
00:11:48,403 --> 00:11:49,970
[ Line ringing]
332
00:11:50,013 --> 00:11:51,623
[ Breathlessly ] Hey, you here at the mall?
333
00:11:51,667 --> 00:11:53,843
No, not yet.
Why are you breathing so hard?
334
00:11:53,887 --> 00:11:55,976
Oh, um, a bunch of kids were vaping next to me,
335
00:11:56,019 --> 00:11:58,892
and I had to army-crawl into a-a candle store.
336
00:11:58,935 --> 00:12:00,458
Yeah. Is there anything you want while I'm here?
337
00:12:00,502 --> 00:12:02,939
Can I tell you what I want,
what I really, really want?
338
00:12:02,983 --> 00:12:05,028
You're watching me right now, aren't you?
339
00:12:05,072 --> 00:12:06,160
Oh --
340
00:12:06,203 --> 00:12:07,204
Cam, okay, look.
341
00:12:07,248 --> 00:12:08,902
I was hoping
I'd run into Posh
342
00:12:08,945 --> 00:12:11,600
here at the gym for a private moment, okay?
343
00:12:11,643 --> 00:12:13,123
Look, we're both
after the Beckhams.
344
00:12:13,167 --> 00:12:15,038
Let's come up with a plan
together --
345
00:12:15,082 --> 00:12:15,952
meet me
at the swim-up bar.
346
00:12:15,996 --> 00:12:17,562
There's a swim-up bar?!
347
00:12:17,606 --> 00:12:19,260
I know,
we should be living here
348
00:12:19,303 --> 00:12:20,914
and Alex should be living
in our stupid house.
349
00:12:20,957 --> 00:12:22,045
[ Cellphone beeps ]
350
00:12:22,089 --> 00:12:23,743
[ Light music plays]
351
00:12:27,050 --> 00:12:28,269
Jay: Hey!
352
00:12:28,312 --> 00:12:29,618
[ Elevator bell dings ]
353
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:35,450
Higgins, I need you!
354
00:12:35,493 --> 00:12:36,320
Where are you?!
355
00:12:37,713 --> 00:12:39,193
[ Grunting ]
356
00:12:39,236 --> 00:12:41,021
A spot of bother,
I see?
357
00:12:41,064 --> 00:12:42,065
I can't do it!
358
00:12:42,109 --> 00:12:43,414
Oh, of course you can.
359
00:12:43,458 --> 00:12:44,720
I'll just crawl
in front of you
360
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,374
so you can grab me
around the waist.
361
00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:48,289
I apologize in advancefor any giggling.
362
00:12:48,332 --> 00:12:49,812
I'm cursedwith the tickle gene.
363
00:12:49,856 --> 00:12:51,814
What's going on?
364
00:12:51,858 --> 00:12:53,903
Someone's stuck
on the slide.
365
00:12:53,947 --> 00:12:55,252
She tried to climb
back down, but --
366
00:12:55,296 --> 00:12:57,298
No backsies, I get it.Yeah.
367
00:12:57,341 --> 00:12:58,690
Oh, oh, oh!
That's for me.
368
00:12:58,734 --> 00:13:00,692
Thank you.
369
00:13:00,736 --> 00:13:02,520
But it goes too fast!Oh, no, don't worry.
370
00:13:02,564 --> 00:13:04,914
I shall vary the flex of mybuttocks to control our speed.
371
00:13:04,958 --> 00:13:06,089
We should be --
[ Laughs ]
372
00:13:06,133 --> 00:13:07,874
No! [ Whimpers ]
373
00:13:07,917 --> 00:13:10,485
My deepest apologies!
374
00:13:13,270 --> 00:13:15,882
Oh, no!
375
00:13:15,925 --> 00:13:17,057
Okay.
376
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:21,452
[ Screaming ]
377
00:13:22,714 --> 00:13:25,239
Noooo!!
378
00:13:25,282 --> 00:13:26,240
[ Laughs ]
379
00:13:26,283 --> 00:13:27,545
That one's sorted.
380
00:13:27,589 --> 00:13:28,459
[ Watch chimes ]
381
00:13:32,115 --> 00:13:34,988
I need some sparkling watersent up to the hot tub cabanas.
382
00:13:35,031 --> 00:13:36,032
Can't say for whom,
383
00:13:36,076 --> 00:13:37,860
but let's includea glass of champagne
384
00:13:37,904 --> 00:13:40,602
in case his poshwife
joins him.
385
00:13:45,128 --> 00:13:47,870
Easy.
386
00:13:47,914 --> 00:13:48,915
Easy.
387
00:13:48,958 --> 00:13:50,090
[ Click, air whirring ]
388
00:13:50,133 --> 00:13:52,570
Come on!
389
00:13:52,614 --> 00:13:54,137
Higgins! Hey, hey.
390
00:13:54,181 --> 00:13:55,660
Um, listen...
391
00:13:55,704 --> 00:13:58,054
I need your helpgetting my hands on the slider.
392
00:13:58,098 --> 00:13:59,795
The slider?
393
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,014
Oh, of course.
394
00:14:01,057 --> 00:14:02,145
Quite a looker, that one.
395
00:14:02,189 --> 00:14:03,799
Well, that's the problem --so far,
396
00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:05,105
I've only been able to lookand not taste.
397
00:14:06,671 --> 00:14:08,891
Say no more. I shall find a wayto deliver the slider to you.
398
00:14:08,935 --> 00:14:10,110
Great!
399
00:14:10,153 --> 00:14:11,154
Um, is there
somewhere private
400
00:14:11,198 --> 00:14:13,069
where I couldenjoy the slider alone?
401
00:14:13,113 --> 00:14:14,897
Might I suggest
one of our rooftop hot tubs
402
00:14:14,941 --> 00:14:16,159
overlooking the city?
403
00:14:16,203 --> 00:14:17,247
Perfect,
I'll wait there.
404
00:14:17,291 --> 00:14:19,293
And I'll -- I'll need a bib --I can make a mess.
405
00:14:27,127 --> 00:14:28,128
[ Lettuce snaps ]
406
00:14:28,171 --> 00:14:30,565
Still crisp.
407
00:14:30,608 --> 00:14:31,958
He's close.
408
00:14:32,001 --> 00:14:33,524
[ Elevator bell dings ]
409
00:14:33,568 --> 00:14:36,527
[ Light music plays]
410
00:14:36,571 --> 00:14:37,920
How'd I get back here?
411
00:14:37,964 --> 00:14:45,275
♪♪
412
00:14:45,319 --> 00:14:46,494
Ah, Posh.
413
00:14:46,537 --> 00:14:48,061
Thank you.
414
00:14:48,104 --> 00:14:49,366
Your husband has askedthat you meet him
415
00:14:49,410 --> 00:14:52,065
up in one of the rooftophot tubs for some champagne.
416
00:14:52,108 --> 00:14:53,501
Phil.
417
00:14:53,544 --> 00:14:57,070
♪♪
418
00:14:57,113 --> 00:14:58,419
Hi.
419
00:14:59,637 --> 00:15:01,770
[ Elevator bell dings ]
420
00:15:01,813 --> 00:15:03,815
[ Sighs ]
421
00:15:03,859 --> 00:15:06,209
Higgins!
The slides aren't the enemy.
422
00:15:06,253 --> 00:15:07,732
Fear is.
423
00:15:07,776 --> 00:15:10,213
It's always a thrill to seeone of my residents grow.
424
00:15:10,257 --> 00:15:11,998
By the way,a certain mystery man
425
00:15:12,041 --> 00:15:13,129
has spotted you
around the building
426
00:15:13,173 --> 00:15:15,218
and has requested your presenceon the roof.
427
00:15:15,262 --> 00:15:16,437
[ Gasps ]
428
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:19,179
Jay's finally doing
something romantic!
429
00:15:19,222 --> 00:15:21,964
Just when I thought
he was a clueless grouch.
430
00:15:22,008 --> 00:15:24,532
♪♪
431
00:15:24,575 --> 00:15:26,447
[ Breathing heavily ]
432
00:15:26,490 --> 00:15:28,362
How many lobbies
does this place have?!
433
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:34,194
Excuse me.Where can I find a bathing suit?
434
00:15:34,237 --> 00:15:36,413
Oh, there are complimentary
suits in all of the cabanas.
435
00:15:36,457 --> 00:15:39,025
Ooh.
Worry not,
I boil them myself nightly.
436
00:15:39,068 --> 00:15:40,243
Ah.
437
00:15:40,287 --> 00:15:41,897
Let's see a robot do that.
438
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:45,161
Hi, Higgins. We havea bit of an unusual request.
439
00:15:45,205 --> 00:15:47,076
Now, we know you need to be
discreet, but...
440
00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:49,122
we are hoping
to have a rendezvous
441
00:15:49,165 --> 00:15:50,253
with a certain
distinguished Brit.
442
00:15:50,297 --> 00:15:51,254
Hmm?
443
00:15:51,298 --> 00:15:52,560
Consider it arranged.
444
00:15:52,603 --> 00:15:54,518
Okay.
Okay.
445
00:16:00,046 --> 00:16:01,221
Still no sign
of the ladies.
446
00:16:01,264 --> 00:16:02,962
Maybe they're in
a different cabana.
447
00:16:05,834 --> 00:16:06,878
Mine's here.
448
00:16:06,922 --> 00:16:08,141
Let's wait for the blonde.
449
00:16:08,184 --> 00:16:09,838
I only know how to do thiswith even numbers.
450
00:16:09,881 --> 00:16:12,101
Hello, Mr. Robot!
451
00:16:12,145 --> 00:16:14,886
Can you tell me where to gofor my romantic surprise?
452
00:16:14,930 --> 00:16:16,236
Gloria?!
453
00:16:16,279 --> 00:16:17,498
[ Inhales deeply ]
454
00:16:23,678 --> 00:16:25,114
Now mine's here,
but yours is gone.
455
00:16:29,684 --> 00:16:30,902
Now they're bothgone!
456
00:16:30,946 --> 00:16:32,165
They'll be back.
457
00:16:32,208 --> 00:16:33,862
Maybe one of them
had a nanny emergency.
458
00:16:33,905 --> 00:16:35,211
Let's wait for them
in there.
459
00:16:35,255 --> 00:16:36,908
Slider?
460
00:16:36,952 --> 00:16:38,301
Arriving shortly.
Cabana 3.
461
00:16:38,345 --> 00:16:39,433
Thank you.
462
00:16:39,476 --> 00:16:40,651
[ Curtain opens ]
463
00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:42,001
Here we are, then.
464
00:16:45,656 --> 00:16:47,180
Higgins,what are you doing?!
465
00:16:47,223 --> 00:16:48,746
Oh, role play.
466
00:16:48,790 --> 00:16:51,532
[ Cockney accent ] I know I am
but a lowly stable boy,
467
00:16:51,575 --> 00:16:53,534
unwanted in the master's
quarters, but --
468
00:16:53,577 --> 00:16:56,711
Perhaps you'd like to
teach me a lesson?
469
00:16:56,754 --> 00:16:58,060
Just stay away
from the face.
470
00:16:58,104 --> 00:17:00,280
Uh, obviously there's been
some sort of misunderstanding.
471
00:17:00,323 --> 00:17:02,195
Yeah, do we look likethe kind of people
472
00:17:02,238 --> 00:17:04,414
that would be intosome sort of weird role play
473
00:17:04,458 --> 00:17:06,112
involving a stable boy?
474
00:17:06,155 --> 00:17:07,765
I'm assuming
he's been naughty
475
00:17:07,809 --> 00:17:10,116
and would do anythingto keep his job.
476
00:17:10,159 --> 00:17:11,291
Cam -- Cam?
477
00:17:11,334 --> 00:17:13,902
In my defense, I do get
this request quite often.
478
00:17:13,945 --> 00:17:15,338
Particularly
around the holidays.
479
00:17:15,382 --> 00:17:17,079
Actually, um...
480
00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:20,126
we were hoping to meet
a certain celebrity couple.
481
00:17:20,169 --> 00:17:21,127
Yeah.Say no more.
482
00:17:21,170 --> 00:17:23,172
I make no promises,
but let me just
483
00:17:23,216 --> 00:17:25,305
wriggle back into my shorts
and make some inquiries.
484
00:17:26,567 --> 00:17:28,264
[ Water splashing ]
485
00:17:32,268 --> 00:17:34,357
Ah,
wonderful timing!
486
00:17:34,401 --> 00:17:36,794
Please step into Cabana 3 --
your mystery man awaits.
487
00:17:36,838 --> 00:17:38,274
[ Giggles ]
488
00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:40,668
[ Curtain opens ]
489
00:17:40,711 --> 00:17:42,104
[ Sighs ] Hi.
490
00:17:42,148 --> 00:17:45,368
I know that you and Iaren't supposed to be here,
491
00:17:45,412 --> 00:17:50,373
but after today, I am tiredof living a life of fear.
492
00:17:50,417 --> 00:17:53,463
Was Gloria
Claire's brunette surprise?
493
00:17:53,507 --> 00:17:58,294
It all started when Clairegave me a free pass to Fun Town.
494
00:17:58,338 --> 00:18:02,168
I thought,
just try it today.
495
00:18:02,211 --> 00:18:06,302
Take a ride,
see how it feels.
496
00:18:06,346 --> 00:18:10,219
Oh. I never noticedhow sexy your feet are.
497
00:18:10,263 --> 00:18:12,830
Thank you, but this isn'thappening, Gloria!
[ Screams ]
498
00:18:13,875 --> 00:18:15,920
[ Curtain opens ]
499
00:18:15,964 --> 00:18:18,358
Oh, there you are.
Sorry we missed you
at the bowling alley.
500
00:18:18,401 --> 00:18:20,360
She looked differentwith a headband on.
501
00:18:20,403 --> 00:18:22,492
Warming up
in a hot tub first --
502
00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:25,408
unconventional, but, hey,
anything to loosen up Becks.
503
00:18:25,452 --> 00:18:26,931
Did we meet a Becky?
504
00:18:26,975 --> 00:18:29,238
Maybe.There were so many of them.
505
00:18:29,282 --> 00:18:31,545
So, how old
is this Becks?
506
00:18:31,588 --> 00:18:32,720
44.
507
00:18:32,763 --> 00:18:33,721
It's on.
508
00:18:33,764 --> 00:18:35,897
Oh, there you are.
509
00:18:38,900 --> 00:18:41,250
Wait...you're Becks?
510
00:18:41,294 --> 00:18:44,079
Yep,and I'm eager to learn.
511
00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:47,648
A warning -- my form is clumsy,but I'm great on my feet.
512
00:18:50,607 --> 00:18:51,608
[ Curtain opens ]
513
00:18:51,652 --> 00:18:54,394
[ Sighs ]
Okay, who gets the dude?
514
00:18:54,437 --> 00:18:55,873
This never happened.
515
00:18:59,442 --> 00:19:01,444
Fine, I'll take him.
516
00:19:01,488 --> 00:19:03,142
But we're just gonna hang out
and see where it goes.
517
00:19:06,710 --> 00:19:07,929
Mmm!
518
00:19:13,848 --> 00:19:15,197
Pardon the interruption.
519
00:19:15,241 --> 00:19:16,677
It looks like you're finished
with the slider?
520
00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:19,288
I am, and can I be honest?I prefer bigger buns.
521
00:19:19,332 --> 00:19:21,551
It's wonderful to just talk
like men sometimes, isn't it?
522
00:19:21,595 --> 00:19:22,378
It is.
523
00:19:27,035 --> 00:19:28,210
Jay,what are you doing here?
524
00:19:28,254 --> 00:19:30,169
I've spent the whole day
looking for that miserable --
525
00:19:33,259 --> 00:19:34,477
You're the Foodie
in a Who-dy?!
526
00:19:34,521 --> 00:19:36,218
W-Why would you
say that?
527
00:19:36,262 --> 00:19:37,654
[ Sniffs ]
528
00:19:37,698 --> 00:19:39,221
Ketchup!
529
00:19:39,265 --> 00:19:40,788
I'm trying,
but I'm lost!
530
00:19:40,831 --> 00:19:42,224
You insulted my mother!
531
00:19:42,268 --> 00:19:45,009
Oh, my God.You're Close to Utlaw?!
532
00:19:45,053 --> 00:19:46,489
It's Closet Outlaw!
533
00:19:46,533 --> 00:19:48,056
Jay, I don't blame youfor being mad.
534
00:19:48,099 --> 00:19:50,841
I-I turned my legions of fansagainst you, and, uh...
535
00:19:50,885 --> 00:19:52,626
it's Foodie in a Hoodie,by -- by the way.
536
00:19:52,669 --> 00:19:54,628
But you got a bigger problemat home that I just heard about,
537
00:19:54,671 --> 00:19:56,325
and I thinkI can help you with it.
538
00:19:56,369 --> 00:19:58,109
Claire?Oh! Gloria.
539
00:19:58,153 --> 00:19:59,459
I can't believe
you recognized me.
540
00:19:59,502 --> 00:20:01,461
I'm so sorry
about my hair.
541
00:20:01,504 --> 00:20:05,160
I'm so glad that we canfinally talk about it.
542
00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:08,381
Grow it out,let yourself be a girl.
543
00:20:08,424 --> 00:20:10,513
Higgins: Okay,final set of instructions
544
00:20:10,557 --> 00:20:12,428
on a day that will no doubtbe a memorable chapter
545
00:20:12,472 --> 00:20:14,604
in my forthcoming memoir,
"You Rang?"
546
00:20:14,648 --> 00:20:15,823
You, Cabana 2.
547
00:20:15,866 --> 00:20:16,824
You, Cabana 3.
548
00:20:16,867 --> 00:20:17,999
[ Giggles ]
Oh.
549
00:20:19,479 --> 00:20:20,523
[ Gasps ]
550
00:20:20,567 --> 00:20:23,222
You areromantic.
551
00:20:24,571 --> 00:20:26,747
Honey, if you don't like
my hair, I can change it.
552
00:20:26,790 --> 00:20:28,314
What? I love it.
553
00:20:28,357 --> 00:20:29,532
Maybe next week
I can arrange
554
00:20:29,576 --> 00:20:31,752
a little rendezvous
with a redhead.
555
00:20:31,795 --> 00:20:33,101
[ Chuckles ]
556
00:20:33,144 --> 00:20:35,277
O-Okay.
557
00:20:35,321 --> 00:20:37,105
I'm glad
we cleared that up.
558
00:20:37,148 --> 00:20:38,976
I can't waitfor my bowling lesson with you.
559
00:20:39,020 --> 00:20:40,717
Oh, my God.
560
00:20:40,761 --> 00:20:42,328
Foot-y in a Hoodie
was here today.
561
00:20:42,371 --> 00:20:44,721
Ah, you're great.
562
00:20:44,765 --> 00:20:46,157
When does Posh get here?
563
00:20:46,201 --> 00:20:47,724
And I apologize
for being late.
564
00:20:47,768 --> 00:20:49,291
You know,
I-I left a message.
565
00:20:49,335 --> 00:20:50,553
I'm sorryI missed your call.
566
00:20:50,597 --> 00:20:51,685
Can you say that
one more time?[ Cellphone beeps ]
567
00:20:51,728 --> 00:20:52,816
Um...
568
00:20:55,428 --> 00:20:58,213
So, I got a few incidental
charges from yesterday.
569
00:20:58,257 --> 00:21:00,302
$200 for
Sugar Baby procurement?
570
00:21:00,346 --> 00:21:01,738
Sorry.
571
00:21:01,782 --> 00:21:04,350
Eight sliders
and one coconut water?
572
00:21:04,393 --> 00:21:05,481
He charged me
for that?
573
00:21:05,525 --> 00:21:08,136
$300 for a slide rescue.
574
00:21:08,179 --> 00:21:11,095
$40 fine for the non-wiping
of stationary bike.
575
00:21:11,139 --> 00:21:12,227
I barely sweat.
576
00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:13,707
You're sweating
right now.
577
00:21:13,750 --> 00:21:17,406
A $150 fine for the non-return
of leg warmers.
578
00:21:17,450 --> 00:21:20,191
And eight
$100 Westworld entry fees?
579
00:21:22,193 --> 00:21:24,370
[ Gasps ] Oh, my God.
We left Cam there!
580
00:21:24,413 --> 00:21:25,980
Oh, no!
581
00:21:26,023 --> 00:21:27,503
♪♪
582
00:21:29,026 --> 00:21:31,420
♪♪
41269
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