Original subtitles

? Oh, yeah, yeah ?

? I'm your basic average girl ?

? And I'm here to save the world ?

? You can't stop me 'cause I'm... ?

? Kim Possible ?

? There is nothing I can't do ?

? When danger calls ?

? Just know that I am on my way ?

? Know that I am on my way ?

? It doesn't matter where or when there's trouble ?

? If you just call my name ?

? Kim Possible ?

? Call me, beep me if you want to reach me ?

? When you want to page me, it's okay ?

? Whenever you need me, baby ?

? Call me, beep me if you want to reach me ?

? Call me, beep me if you want to reach me ?

? Doesn't matter where, doesn't matter when ?

? Doesn't matter when ?

? I will be there for you till the very end ?

? Danger or trouble, I'm there on the double ?

? You know that you always can call Kim Possible. ?

Hmm.

( Gasping breaths )

Incoming! Achoo!

Jim, say it, don't spray it.

You boys are burning up.

Can we have some more chicken soup? Please?

Ron, maybe we should bail from Sick Tweeb Central

and pick up the study fest at your house.

No fear here... I'm cold-proof.

No germ has ever successfully breached the fortress

that is the Stoppable immune system.

( Gasping breaths )

( sneezes )

MOTHER: Bless you.

Well, at least he covered.

I do not want to catch this.

How did I catch this?

We can go to the tape. What?

WADE: I've enhanced the germ trail.

Eww.

Woop, there it is.

I don't even want to know how you got that.

Hey, K.P., how we feeling today?

( Stuffed up ): I can't breathe through my nose.

Okay, yeah, no idea what you just said.

Hey, Kim, I'm patching through an elite

scientific team for a satellite briefing.

Please and thank you.

Kim, we've just put the finishing touches

on our new invention.

We call it...

Ray-X.

Ray-X?

( Sniffles ): What's it do?

Well, uh, it's a secret.

Hence, the "X."

"X" as in "the unknown."

Of course, we know.

Right. Uh, but no one else does,

so it's unknown to everyone else.

The point is, we could use some extra help

with security around here.

Just for today, until we have moved Ray-X

to a secret location.

We're calling it Location X.

Say no more. I'm on it.

( Groaning ): Oh, I got up too fast.

Uh, you really think

you're up to this?

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

It's just a cold.

All I have to do

is sit there and guard some little ray thingy.

( Kim sneezes )

( repeated sneezing )

( beeping )

I just heard a way freaky security alarm go off.

It sounded like, "Choo, choo, choo!"

That was me... I was sneezing.

Stay alert and keep your eyes open for anything suspicious.

Shego, in mere moments Ray-X will be ours.

What does this Ray-X do?

It's need-to-know. Uh-huh, uh-huh.

So you don't know?

I need to know... That's why we're here.

Kim Possible.

Not to worry,

I have just the plan to get past her.

( Sneezing )

Aw, somebody's sick.

This'll be cake.

We can't just walk in there.

What about the plan? I drew it myself.

Everyone knows it's impossible

to keep your eyes open while you're sneezing.

So if we time it right, she won't see a thing.

Okay, fine.

( Kim sneezing repeatedly )

( wheels squeaking )

KIM: I'm sorry.

Visiting hours are over.

( Stuffed up ): Rod, meet me at the bain entrance.

I got Drack-id.

"Drag Kid"? Who's he?

No! Drag-ken!

Drag Ken? Drag him where?

I have no idea what this is going to do to you,

but I'm banking it's very, very bad!

Drakken!

( Drakken grunts )

( alarm blaring )

Whoa!

I have to sneeze. What?

I need to cover my nose.

Nice try, Kimmie.

( Gasps, sneezes )

Aah! Aw! That was a low blow.

Fire escape routes activated. Security doors open.

( Gasps )

You should have stayed in bed,

Kim Possible.

Where is he?! Where's the dragon?!

DRAKKEN ( laughs ): I'm so excited!

And I just can't hide it. Ha!

What do you suppose this thing does, Shego?

( Phone rings ) Shego?

Hello?

( Stuffed up ): Dake, I'm calling in sick.

Kim Possible gave me her stupid cold.

What?! You can't call in sick!

I have to go, I... I...

( sneezes )

Ugh! That's disgusting.

( Growls )

I need a new temporary cohort

in evil ASAP.

But who? Who?

( Shuddering ): Ew!

Never again.

Killigan. He works cheap.

( Phone rings )

Ron's crib. Hello? Who dis?

( Stuffed up ): Hey, Rod. It's be. Grandma?

Kib. Listen, my mom is way cranked that I went out sick.

MOTHER: Cranked is putting it mildly!

Worry not, K.P..

Rufus and I can totally handle Drakken.

Mom? Can I have some soup?

Behold, Rufus... I give you Operation Ray-X.

Okay, scuba to point A.

Suction cup to point B.

We'll bungee jump to point C.

( Groaning )

( grunts, yells )

( grunts )

( yells )

( Rufus sighs )

SCOTTISH MAN: Sidekick?! I'll nay be a sidekick!

You said equal partnership... 50/50!

Killigan, be reasonable.

Some were born to lead, and some...

And some were born to yap, yap, yap.

How about co-villain? No!

( Wheels squeaking )

Shego! Wow, you look green.

I mean, you know, greener.

( Sneezes )

Aw... Ew! Total grossness.

Like taking candy from a baby.

A sick, sneezy baby

who sprayed her germy illin' all over me.

Thank goodness for the Stoppable fortress of immunity.

( Gasps, sneezes )

Fortress of immunity, huh?

Ah, you drive a hard bargain, Dr. Drakken.

But I'm in. With the two of us

working together, nothing shall stop us!

Nothing!

Ah... ah...

( sneezes )

KILLIGAN: Need I remind you of the contract?

"Should one signee become incapacitated,

the other party shall assume all head super villain duties."

( stuffed up ): But you can't do it alone.

To get that Ray-X back, you'll need a temporary lackey.

One step ahead of you.

( Doorbell rings )

Hi. I'm Hank Perkins from the temp agency.

Ready to get to work, sir.

So tell me, laddie,

have you any previous evil experience?

No, but I'm a self-starter, and I have a law degree.

Eh, close enough.

I so don't get

this soap opera. What's not to get?

Felicia's archenemy created a machine

that swapped her brain with Brock's.

Let me see if there's any more soup.

Now, if I were soup, where would I...

Ray-X!

Gun it, Perkins!

Actually, I was wondering

if you could sign my time card.

Ay! Just go, man! Go!

( Stuffed up ): With us sick, and the Ray-X in the hands

of Killigan and Drakken, we're doobed.

We're what?

Doobed! Doobed!

Check it out... I found these plans in Ron's stuff.

Hoo-sha!

( Man sneezes )

( sneezes )

( dialing phone )

( phone rings ) Yes?

Ay, can you believe Felicia and Brock switched brains?

I know! So does that mean the wedding's off?

Check it, Rufus.

We've modified Ron's Operation Ray-X.

We parachute to point A,

drop and roll to point B.

PERKINS: I've reorganized Dr. Drakken's file system.

From A to Evil over here.

Or we can just do this.

Oh, no extra trouble... I really want to get in

on the ground floor of this whole super villainy thing.

You see, I think it could be

the growth industry of the next ten years.

In fact, I just caught my first prisoners just now.

What's that? Oh, no biggie. That's what I'm here for.

RON: Rufus?

Buddy? Where'd you go?

Missing tweebs, too.

Along with my Operation Ray-X schematics.

Wade, I need a ride.

( All grunting )

PERKINS: God, I hate to do this,

but I do need to score some points with the boss, so...

KIM ( coughing ): Who are you?

Hank Perkins. Hello!

Do you work here?

Well, I am a temp, but a little birdie

told me I might be kept on.

( Grunts )

Sorry, Hank.

( Buzzing ) ( boys grunt )

Wow, looks like somebody's

been drinking lots of fluids...

and retaining every ounce.

So not in the mood, Shego.

( Both sneeze )

Gesundheit.

Thanks.

DRAKKEN: Come on, Shego!

Show her who's boss!

Uppercut! Uppercut!

( Yells )

Snug as a flu bug in a rug.

( Growls )

Okay, I am officially resigning,

uh, so if someone could just write me

a quick letter...

BOTH: Wrong chandelier!

I'll just, uh... run!

Yes! Yes!

No!

KILLIGAN: Are you daft, man?

Just 'cause you have her brain in your head

doesn't mean you can't love her.

KIM: Okay, good news, bad news.

We managed to keep Ray-X out of the clutches of evil.

Excellent!

And, uh, uh, the bad news?

It sort of got a little crushed

on the way out of the clutches of evil.

I got to know.

What was this X thing designed to do, anyway?

BOTH: Cure the common cold.

I hate irony.

FATHER: Don't forget to be home early.

I'm having the entire board

of directors from the lab over for dinner, remember?

Don't worry, Dad.

It has top priority on my sched.

Honey, are these the same board members

you're always complaining about?

I don't always complain about them.

I mean, sure, Dr. Cook is a bit of a know-it-all,

and Dr. Harris's toupee looks like roadkill,

and if Dr. Kramer tells one more pointless

story about "the old country," so help me, I'll...

Maybe you should skip the coffee today, Dad.

Heh. Sorry, Kimmy.

I'm as nervous as a porcupine in a balloon factory.

Hon, you're a shoe-in for the promotion.

But we've never had the big bosses over to the house before.

Don't worry. We'll be on our best behavior.

Right, kids?

Hey, talk to the tweebs, not me.

BOTH: Hey, we heard that.

Hola, Possible clan.

Kim, ready to hit it?

I can't believe I'm going to be on the cover

of Spirit Squad Weekly.

It's the cheerleading magazine.

I am so freaking.

You'll be fine. My advice...

Just be totally and completely sincere.

Hey, that's actually good advice.

That's not something I practice myself,

but I think you can pull it off.

( Beeping )

Hey, Wade. What's the sitch?

Kim, think you can squeeze in a rescue before homeroom?

You got transportation?

Never mind.

WADE: This is Dr. Wanda Wong,

one of the country's top scientific leaders.

Drakken captured her and took her

to some kind of ice fortress.

Has he done the underwater layer yet?

See, if it was me,

I would have gone

with underwater before ice.

Ready to eject?

Yes. Good.

Cold, Dr. Wong?

Why am I sitting

on an ice cube?

So you will divulge every detail

of your top-secret projects, that's why.

You make no sense to me.

Welcome to my life.

Oh, a little more glutial discomfort

and you'll be Little Miss Busy Lips.

I still don't get the ice.

Grr. Fine, forget the ice!

You leave me no choice but to use this!

( Shrieks )

Who? What?!

Chillin' new lair, Drakken.

Kim Possible!

"We'll build a frozen fortress.

She'll never find us there."

Ice the sass, Shego.

Don't worry, we're the good guys,

here to save you, yadda, yadda.

I'm going to whip you

in Technical Merit and Artistic Impression.

Bring it.

( Gasping )

Whew!

What's she doing?

Trying to make us dizzy?

No, worse.

WOMAN: Whoo! That's going to be a great cover shot, Kim.

Now, I just need to ask you

a couple of questions for the article.

Now, I understand

in addition to cheering

and being on the honor roll,

somebody also saves the world

from time to time, hmm?

Oh, you know. No big.

Well, I know our readers

are going to want to know this:

Do you have time for a personal life?

Oh, I make time.

I'll bet you're crushing on someone right now.

Give us a hint.

His name is Bobby Johnson.

Just moved here from Upperton,

but I'm not sure if I like him because I like him

or because he asked out Bonnie first. ( Gasps )

I knew it.

Well, that's some hint!

Any cool hobbies?

Oh, nothing special.

I collect cuddle buddies. I love them.

I can't get to sleep without my pandaroo.

( Iaughing )

Cuddle buddies? Yeah...

Kim, I have to be honest with you.

We like our cover girls

to be, ooh, how shall I put this?

Um... trend-forward.

There must be some other activity that you do regularly.

I pick my nose when nobody's looking.

( Stifled mumbling )

Anyone else want to be on the cover?

Ooh-ooh! I do, I do! Me.

Okay, Kim,

just tell yourself a big, fat lie.

You can do it.

The color of my hair is greee... red.

My name is Possible.

The sky is blue.

Pro-wrestling is... fake.

No!

Wade, something's wrong with me.

I can only tell the truth and, and...

you spend too much time in your room.

It's just not healthy.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Okay, Kim, I'll disregard that until we figure out what's up.

Hold the communicator

at arm's length.

Scanning for weirdness.

Well?

Way weird.

It looks like all of your

brain inhibitors are shut down.

Meaning?

Meaning you can't lie.

You can only blurt out the truth.

Now let's look back at the last 24 hours.

The usual. Got up, went to school.

Fought Shego. Drakken zapped me

with some funky ray thing.

Whoa, whoa. What kind of ray?

Don't know. It was yellow, I think.

A truth ray.

That's got to be it. ( Gasps )

If I was hit, I'll bet Ron was hit, too.

There's no telling what kind of trouble

he's getting himself into.

All right, people.

I assume you all read

and are prepared to discuss the classic novella,

"Lo, The Plow Shall Till the Soil of Redemption."

I did not and I am not!

Wait. No.

What I meant to say is that I read...

only the first three pages!

I almost dislocated my jaw from yawning!

Stoppable!

Explain yourself.

This book is snobby, pompous, overwritten,

and the pictures were in black and white.

Excuse me, Mr. Barken,

but I agree with Ron's criticism.

Yeah. Me too. Um...

I just didn't have the guts to slam your favorite book.

Uh-huh. Yeah. That's right.

That's it! I've had it with this book.

I've despised "Lo, the Plow Shall Till

"the Soil of Redemption" ever since I had to suffer through it

back in military school.

KIDS: Yeah! Yeah!

Ron! Ron! Ron!

Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron!

And you know what else?

I've never kissed a girl.

Well, except for the CPR dummy in health class.

Now, I know it's not the coolest thing to admit,

but, hey, the truth sets you free.

Dude,

you tell it straight up.

Ron, listen. We were both hit with a truth ray and...

No diggity. Isn't it great?

Great? Hey, Penny.

You have the most beautilicious eyes in school.

Gosh, thanks, Ron.

That's so sweet.

Hey, I'll see you around, okay?

I tell it like it is.

Ain't no shame in my game.

This rules.

( Tonal beeping )

What's the truth sitch, Wade?

According to my research,

the effects of the truth ray should wear off

in about a day.

( School bell ringing )

This is so my worst nightmare.

My worst nightmare is the one

where I'm in school in my underwear. Ron,

you've actually done that.

I have to get home and tell Mom and Dad

before his big-shot bosses get there.

Mom, Dad.

I gotta talk to you before...

Dr. Cook, Dr. Harris, Dr. Kramer.

You've met the twins.

This is my Kimmy Cup.

I hate it when he calls me that.

( Gasps )

( gasps )

Aren't you just the prettiest thing?

I have split ends and I'm trying to cover

a mountain-size zit on my cheek that you just touched.

Teenagers. Always playing us squares.

Why don't we adjourn to the living room

while we wait for the chairman of the board to arrive, hmm?

( Sighs )

And after churning and churning and churning,

my great-great grandpapa

finally made the first goat butter

his village had ever seen.

Wow. What a captivating story.

Wasn't it guys?

Oh, very.

( Yawns ): Cool.

Yeah.

( Muffled mumbling )

Kim?

Uh-uh.

We'll get it.

Kimmy, What is wrong with you?

KIM: I'm trying not to tell Dr. Kramer

that you were right.

His stories about the old country...

They're pointless snore fests.

Goat butter is not pointless.

It is delicious.

Interestingly, in ancient Syria,

they would use a goatskin sack.

Dad, you were right about Dr. Cook, too.

He is a know-it-all.

Oh, my hair!

Don't worry. My father already spilled

about your bad piece, even if he didn't...

Trust me, aliens could spot that thing from space.

Kim! Kim!

She's funnier without the pillow.

Hoo-sha!

That's it. Grab your coats.

We are leaving this instant.

Dr. Possible, see me in my office

first thing tomorrow.

We need to discuss your future at the lab,

or lack thereof.

Wait. You can't do that.

It's not my dad's fault.

I got hit with a truth ray.

I'm sorry.

Ha! Truth ray.

Absurd.

The board chairman.

Now my career is completely over.

Dr. Wong?

Kim! I can't thank you enough

for your help today.

Thanks to you,

I narrowly escaped that nasty Drakken

and his truth ray.

There really was a truth ray?

I saved her. I save lots of people.

Of course you do.

You were brilliant.

Like daughter, like father, right doctors?

Oh, of course.

I couldn't agree more.

It's an entire family

of geniuses.

Now, let's get inside and discuss

your promotion, shall we?

RON: So everything worked out?

KIM: Totally. I apologized to the board members

and, like, a zillion other people.

How about you?

I'm still mourning the loss of my truth mojo.

You could just be honest on your own.

Believe me, I'm trying.

Hi, Ron.

Hey, Penny.

You-you have, you have the most,

the most, um, you got

the most cans in the school's

charity can drive.

Keep up the good work, Tiger.

Wait! I didn't hear

any complaints from the CPR dummy.

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