Original subtitles

THERE ARE NO ROSES WITHOUT A FIRE

Mail!

Mail!

Please sign here.

Who's it from?

It's written here. The Central Film Rental.

Here you go.

And something extra.

- Good morning. - Pardon me.

It's you? I didn't recognise you.

The shaving foam makes you look like a clerk.

It's me.

I only have a postcard for your wife.

May I? Thank you.

Registered mail for you.

- Thank you. - Sign here first.

- My husband can do that. - That's against regulations.

- So what? - You know us.

- Rules are rules. - I don't have the pencil.

The rules are simpler now. A normal pencil is allowed.

- Thank you very much. - You're welcome.

Here you are.

Wait! Your mail!

"Kind regards from Jerzy".

- Throw it away. - What do you mean?

Throw away registered mail?

Wrong door.

What?

Wrong door, sir.

The Revenue Office is across from here.

It's the right door.

I remember my little bed stood here.

It was covered with a plaid blanket.

Behind that wall my mother...

- did embroidery work. - There's the bathroom.

There was a better light there. Her eyesight was bad.

Sorry, I got very emotional.

I'll introduce myself.

Malinowski.

- What? - Filikiewicz.

Nice name.

- Have a seat I'll make tea. - Coffee, please.

- Do you have a cream puff? - What?

It's a pastry.

- I don't. Sorry. - It's fine.

Easy on the water.

- Is this OK? - Yes. Thanks.

- Are you the only tenant? - Me and my wife.

- Who? - My wife.

The only private tenant. The rest are offices.

- I got a new flat. - Is it big?

It's huge.

One big room, a second big room.

- A bathroom? - Sure.

- A kitchen? - With a window.

- A bright kitchen? - Exactly.

A balcony or loggia?

Sir...

Could you live in something like this?

Are you kidding?

Here's the first room.

The second room, this way.

The balcony.

And the kitchen.

- Where's the bathroom? - Over there.

I have no choice. I have to take it.

Here's the balcony, the second room and the kitchen.

- Where's the bathroom? - Behind the kitchen.

He has to take it. No other choice.

He's nuts if he wants to change with us.

Why? I met him. He's emotional, sentimental.

His little bed stood here covered with a rug...

A plaid blanket.

Behind this wall his mother did embroidery work.

- That's the bathroom. - I know.

It was because her poor eyesight.

He recognised this door.

I don't feel bad about it. He doesn't want to live there.

- He wants to live here? - That's right.

Wait.

- Is this flat really yours? - Of course.

Here you are.

Nobody else lives here, right?

Here you are.

- It's been paid for? - Naturally.

It won't be demolished, will it?

No. Have a look.

- Listen... - Yes?

Are you...

Sorry.

- I'll be blunt. - Go ahead.

Are you fully capable of performing legal acts?

Just sign the papers. I'll take care of everything.

You have to inform the administrator.

Where can I find him?

Depends. He's on the roof or in the basement.

He's not here.

Come.

Well...

IF YOU'VE NEVER BEEN HUMAN, A HUMAN WON'T HELP YOU

Who wrote those words?

Majerówna.

It wasn't me.

What writer?

Sienkiewicz.

Not quite.

It was Mickiewicz. C minus.

Excuse me. Where can I buy some cereal?

I don't know. I'm new here.

The grocery store will open soon nearby.

Okay.

Where can I buy it now?

Go to the main street,

get on the bus number 184 and get off at the third stop.

Then go to the nearest post office and you'll have cereal around the corner.

But don't bother. You can come over to my place.

It's the flat number 416, on the fourth floor.

- You have cereal? - Yes.

- Thank you. - Knock loudly. My doorbell is broken.

- Alright. - I'll be back soon.

We'll take care of everything.

It's open!

Come in!

Help!

Help me!

- What's happening? - My tap fell off.

- Let go. - I can't.

- Let go! - I can't!

See? Isn't that better?

Well?

- You're right. Thanks. - It's nothing.

- Jerzy Dąbczak. - Jan Filikiewicz.

Don't worry. You'll make a building defects claim.

Yes, but...

But, you see... Glass shattered in this door.

It's all building defects.

That's not a problem.

It's alright.

- That's not all. - Yeah?

Windows don't shut, there's a gas leak.

- Plaster is falling off. - It's all new.

- Radiators don't work. - Really?

- Yeah. - It's temporary.

- Really? - The heat station has to create a plan.

It'll be as be warm as toast tomorrow, until 1982.

- And then? - It'll get colder with more buildings.

We'll monitor it.

- We? I can count on your help? - I deal with such things on the spot.

- Water! - Where?

- Is it coming from the hall? - From the bathroom.

- You must have clogged the drain! - What?

You must have clogged it.

- You think I did it? - Who else?

I'm sure it was you. Look!

OK. It's done.

Call me Jurek.

I'm Janek.

Go to the basement now and turn a pipe valve.

It'll shut the water off.

Hurry! Go!

- Did it work? - Yes.

There's also a problem with the floor here.

I think you should replace the stave.

- I'll deal with it. - Thank you.

- It's nothing. I'm doing it for myself. - Yeah...

- You mean... for me? - That's right. For me.

- What? - I don't want a crooked floor.

I'll go and get my things. We'll talk later.

- Can you explain? - What?

- The crooked floor. - I like even floors.

How will you take one room from us?

Take? It's mine.

I knew that guy was up to something.

What guy?

- Malinowski. He changed flats with us. - That guy!

I don't know him.

I'm registered at your flat.

What housing cooperative were you a member of?

- Elektromonter. Why? - I'd move in, anyway.

No. No way.

It's not up to you. I'm registered as a tenant in your old flat.

Wherever you go, I go with you.

I can't be homeless.

How do you know that I didn't sign you out?

Because you can't.

You could if I went somewhere

and didn't give a sign of life for six months.

- But I did regularly. - In what way?

I knew you'd throw my postcards away. That's why they were registered.

- Jerzy Dąbczak? - Your wife's first husband.

Wait. In that case I'm not moving.

- You want a lift? - No, thanks.

Great. Bye.

I'm sick of it.

Wanda, it's just five more years of waiting.

He'll move in with us anyway.

- It will change. - He never changes.

I'll think of something.

- As if! - Wanda, please.

- Janek? - Yes?

I have an idea.

We'll block the door in the night and won't let him in.

Come in! Sounds reasonable.

Yogi Baboo! Here I am.

Good evening.

You look great, baby.

- How can I help you? - Just a minute.

Janek!

Do something.

- It's alright. Thank you. - Goodnight.

Goodnight.

- I want... - It's fine.

I want to say...

I was wrong about you. I expected you'll block the door.

You'd have to let me in but just in case...

Well...

I see. No rooms were available in a hotel.

What hotel?

- You can't do this. - I can't sleep in the street.

Baby... Don't just stand there.

Baby...

- Do you have some tea? - We do.

Good.

My dressing gown...

It's ridiculous. Are you ashamed of me?

We're like family.

You didn't change much. You look curvaceous.

Say something. Is it silent treatment or what?

Jasiu!

We were so happy together.

Remember that barn by the lake? We had to seek shelter.

There was only orange vodka at the local store.

I'd rather drink poison.

Baby, did you tell him how we rolled around in the hay?

No.

Stop whistling. Go to sleep. Turn the light off.

I don't understand. You wanted to work extra hours.

I want to have fewer hours now if that's possible.

But last week you asked me for extra hours.

Then you can see that...

My wife goes to work at 11:00 a. m.

I want to have the morning off.

She has troubles with insomnia. I don't want her to be alone with...

Alone.

Good.

I understand. Alone, alone.

Yogi Baboo!

They say a dog is a man's best friend.

You want to keep a dog?

He's here for a trial period. Maybe a cat would be better.

What would you prefer? A cat or a dog?

The old boy sheds his coat.

- Jerzy? - So, a cat?

- Can I have a word with you? - Of course.

So?

- I'll move to that new flat. - I know.

- Under one condition. - Yes?

You'll stop flirting with Wanda.

- I don't flirt with her. - That's my condition.

It's a deal.

- Good. - Good.

- I'll call the movers tomorrow. - No, don't!

They will be here at 10:00 a.m.

- How did you know? - That's my profession.

What profession?

Well... it's a new profession. It doesn't have a name yet.

What's your brother-in-law's profession?

My brother-in-law?

He's got your wife's former name.

- He's her brother then. - He's her former husband.

How is it possible that he has a right to live with us?

Can you imagine it?

That's a normal thing.

Do you see this man?

- We're evicting him. - From where?

- His own wife. - Impossible.

They got divorced.

And she had to live with her ex.

She got married again.

We're evicting the second husband as her first husband refuses to register him.

Alright.

- I can't be evicted. - You're the main tenant.

You're fine and you're complaining.

Did you move in?

We're bringing our stuff today.

You'll have to put in locks. I need a coin.

Here.

- I've got locks. - I mean new locks.

Why?

Your locks can be open with any key.

Aren't you supposed to provide proper locks?

Certainly.

If you insist, we'll do it but...

- Can't we do it unofficially? - Now you're talking.

The locksmith will be there tomorrow. Is there a doorbell?

- Yes. - But isn't working.

- I didn't check. - I'll send an electrician tonight.

He'll remove the seal, so you can use gas.

Why was it sealed?

Don't be childish. Tell him to install sockets.

There are no sockets?

They're plastered up. You wouldn't find them.

- Door handles? - There are.

- What about a sink? - It's there.

You're a lucky guy.

Excuse me!

Take my two suitcases upstairs.

Alright.

And this one.

Mr. Dąbczak said it'd be two hundred.

Here.

Can you help me carry it?

Hey!

Don't touch that pipe! Do you want this to collapse?

There's a rope puller over there! I used it already!

I'll come and help you!

See? It works.

I'll go upstairs and grab it.

What's happening?

Janek?

Janek.

What did you dream about?

- Why? - It's our first night here.

It'll come true.

Well... I hope it doesn't.

- What was it? - Him.

- Put something on. - You don't like it any more?

- The glass... - He's asleep anyway.

- I'm not! - Jesus!

Don't worry I'll go to sleep when you leave.

It's not as simple as it used to be.

Intrusive tenants were evicted.

Now we have to do paperwork, collect evidence.

We can evict anybody, but it just takes longer.

How?

The most common reasons are disturbance, vandalism, drinking.

It has to be reported by more than one person.

Five or six denunciations, or complaints would be enough.

It's good to have some anonymous letters.

How do I know people will report anything?

They will.

ORANGE VODKA

And some orange cake flavouring.

- Here you are. - I mean orange in taste.

That's the one. Thank you.

You're welcome.

- Yes? - Jerzy?

- I want to talk to you. - Yeah?

You don't have to knock. We're at home.

We should get to know each other better.

What do you mean?

Wanda will be home late. I have some vodka in the fridge.

Really?

- Come. - Let's go.

Yogi Baboo! Great!

- Orange vodka? - It's for me. Look.

- A nice supply. I'm surprised. - See?

Orange vodka is awful. I won't ever drink it again.

- Cheers! - Cheers!

- Wanda is like a rare diamond. - Of course she is.

You're a lucky guy.

- Cheers! - Cheers!

- Take it easy. - Why?

- No. - Have some more.

- I might get rowdy. - Same with me.

- Really? I didn't know. - We make a good team.

Cheers!

- Besides, I get horny. - Me too.

Yeah? I get horny.

What do you mean horny?

The building I lived in was being renovated.

One night we boozed up.

This blonde chick lived there.

I climbed up the scaffolding to find her at 4:00 a.m.

I knocked on all windows shouting: Baby?

Here you can climb up the scaffolding to the tenth floor.

- Baby? - Baby? We make a good team.

- Cheers! - Cheers!

You're out of vodka?

I'll get some more. I'll throw the bottle out.

Good.

Wanda is like a rare diamond.

I'm telling you.

Yogi Baboo!

Jasiu!

I hate mice!

- Where was it? - I kept it hidden.

You really amaze me.

You served me, I'll serve you.

- Jesus! - Wait.

It's no big deal. We have a nice supply.

Not a word! Look!

"It's no use crying over spilled milk". Remember that.

That's right. Have a shot. Cheers!

You'll get used to the taste.

Cheers!

Janek?

- Do you want milk? - Thanks.

Are you a stuntman? Yesterday you climbed up to the twelfth floor to me.

I was amazed. How did you do that?

Sorry, it won't happen again.

Why don't you come for breakfast?

I don't eat breakfast!

There was a wild party yesterday.

- I'm sorry. - Why? I like to party myself.

We have to party together some day.

Of course...

There he is.

Wanda, what is this?

- Don't talk to me, you... - Don't talk to her, you...

- Darling. - Darling!

Darling!

- What are you doing here? - Can't you see?

I'm comforting a wife whose husband is an alcoholic. Darling!

That was good. I have a file for you.

Four complaints. Very critical.

Can I take it with me?

No. It's important evidence of my community work.

It will stay here. We'll show it when necessary.

- What do you need it for? - It's about Mr. Filikiewicz.

And that's me.

It's not good.

I'll return your ID.

I'm not good with names.

- You're Filikiewicz? - That's right.

- And the guy is Dąbczak? - Yes.

Will he register his wife?

You're mistaken again. She's my wife.

I meant the other wife.

My God. He has a wife and children too?

No kids. Just a wife.

- What's her address? - What?

Where does she live?

In Łomża. Why?

There is no rose without love.

I want that beautiful gul.

- There is no rose without jealousy. - Excuse me.

- Excuse me. - I want that red gul.

- Does Mrs. Dąbczak live here? - No.

- I got the wrong address. - Wait.

- Mrs. Dąbczak, you say? - Yes.

Oh, my! What is it?

It's you?

I misheard you the first time.

- Come in. - Thank you.

Oh, excuse me.

As your husband's good friend, I came to warn you.

God forbid you move into his new flat.

- You know he moved to Warsaw? - Go on...

Your poor husband is living in a tiny room.

An alcoholic is the owner. There are complaints.

Go on...

- Daddy, are you there? - Yeah!

Thank God.

- Let the dogs out! - Alright!

You can't leave now.

They are well-trained.

But why?

What's going on?

- Dąbczak's friend is here! - I'm coming.

- Mrs... - Quiet. You'll talk to daddy.

- I decided to come here selflessly. - Shut it.

- Shall I call Zenek? - He's too weak.

- Who is? - Just a moment.

- Give me the address. - What address?

He won't tell you voluntarily.

- The address! - What?

- Give us the address! - What are you talking about?

The address, the address...

My address is my business.

Silence!

- Stop pretending you're stupid! - Daddy!

- Stay calm. - The address!

We just want to know where Dąbczak is.

- So you don't know? - I don't.

- You only want his address? - Yes.

I don't quite understand.

You don't seem to like him.

I want to kill him!

Great. It means we have something in common.

In common? You're his friend.

A friend?

He moved into my flat without permission.

- Your flat? - Mine.

Where do you live?

- In a new housing estate. - Your ID.

Here.

Check it.

- Find the address. - Easy.

Now you can tell me what's going on.

Look at this.

Such small plant requires a lot of work.

I'll make eleven zlotys for it, or nine at wholesale.

How is it connected with Dąbczak?

Well...

Tell him.

- I have a fiancé. - A husband.

A fiancé. Zenek.

Zenek could get a job in Warsaw.

But none of us has residence there.

I want to get out of here.

- Dąbczak offered me a fake marriage. - What do you mean?

I marry Dąbczak who has residence in Warsaw.

I register as his wife.

Dad buys me a flat and I divorce Dąbczak.

I marry Zenek and register him as my husband.

Sounds complicated.

It's simple. Many do so. They use kids or grease palms.

Dąbczak was a cheaper option.

He tricked us and escaped. We need to find him.

Yeah.

That means he's running from you.

- Yeah. - He's running from you!

That's great.

- Which floor? - Fifth.

It's here.

- Let me... - Go ahead.

- Ladies first. - Thank you.

This is his room.

You can take your coat off. It's warm.

Thank you.

He needs to see that you feel at home here.

Do you have a nightdress?

Where would I have it?

I'll give you my wife's new nightie.

He'll think it's yours.

Just a second.

I can't tell when he's going to be back.

You can read a book.

Here. Pardon me.

Well...

It looks great!

Why don't you lie down?

Here you are.

- No TV? - Unfortunately, no.

Yogi Baboo!

That's just my wife.

Wanda, this is Luśka. My surprise.

I found her in Łomża and took her home.

I forgot about the silent treatment.

We had a little argument. That's why she's unfriendly...

I'll explain everything.

You probably won't believe it, but...

this nightie is a part of the plan to make me look...

- We borrowed it. - Explain it.

We just did. It should be clear.

Wanda!

Don't make a fuss.

I can explain.

It's your revenge for what I did this morning.

- Don't do this to me! - What?

I'm so sorry.

Break up with her. Make her go.

There's nothing between us.

- Do you swear? - I swear.

Get dressed and get out! Now!

No! Calm down!

Stay here!

Do you want Jerzy to leave?

- I do. - Good.

See?

- Thank you. - Goodbye.

Mr. Director, excuse me.

I almost forgot.

Can you give my husband extra hours?

Of course... I don't understand.

Why won't he ask for it himself?

It's because of our family situation.

Janek is too ambitious to admit it to you.

Very well. I understand.

Why there's no TV?

You don't like it? I love it.

There's a great show on tonight.

I didn't sleep all night because I went to a pop concert once.

Do you know what she sang? A beautiful lyrical song.

"There's no rose..."

Where's the bathroom?

- Over there. - Just a second.

There is no rose without love.

I want that beautiful gul.

There is no rose without jealousy.

I want that red gul.

- Do you live here? - I do.

I'll show you! Bastard!

That pop singer...

Zenek! That's not him.

Who is he?

That's not him. You idiot.

I apologise, I thought you were him.

Who?

Luśka...

We're really sorry, Zenek has a temper.

- I didn't get home for the night. - But...

You must...

You must admit...

that my wife was a bit more...

- restrained yesterday. - I was mad at that bastard.

- You never met him? - Who?

That guy you took me for.

- Yes. - What?

I never saw him.

You start a fight when you don't know what he looks like?

I didn't want him to get upset.

I'm not starting anything.

That's alright. Holding back impulses is unhealthy.

- What? - Give him a good beating.

He will.

Is there a construction site nearby?

Hold it for a minute. I'll be back.

Okay.

Thanks.

It's done.

There you go.

- Thank you. - Don't mention it.

- It'll be two hundred. - I'll get it.

- Here. - Thanks.

I thought you were him.

- No. - I know.

It's like that railwayman.

His wife came back, so he hid her in the closet.

- His wife? - I said his wife came back.

- He hid her in the closet. - His wife came back.

- He hid her... - It's Jerzy!

He doesn't have the key.

- It's his wife. She has a key. - It's Jerzy at the door.

Wait here.

Lusia. Go to bed.

To the bed!

Be careful with the door.

- Is it him? - Are you crazy?

He could have disguised himself.

We're very sorry. My boyfriend has a temper.

Where is the main tenant?

I'm here.

- Who's he? - He's not him.

- Dąbczak will come soon. - The letters are true.

- No roses without a fire. - What?

The officer said there are no roses without a fire.

Didn't you mean spikes? What is this about?

You have unregistered tenants in your flat.

They don't live here. They came to visit.

- In a nightgown? - It's not mine.

Another one.

- Come here. - Me?

I'm an impartial witness. I heard everything.

- Heard what? - I live beneath this flat.

I don't want to interfere. I'll tell you the truth.

These people have different sexual preferences.

There were two husbands here and one wife.

One wife was missing. Now, she's here.

It's called group sex.

They have...

Well...

Shall I say...

- Yuck! - It's not illegal.

That's a lie. She's the second wife of our first husband.

- I mean mine. - That's what I said.

It doesn't make sense.

Roses without smoke. It's nonsense.

You are fined. I'll see if they have moved out tomorrow.

They can't. I need them.

- You have to register them. - Naturally.

Do you have IDs?

Zenek...

- Here. - Paying now or shall we summon?

No, no. I'll pay.

Can I have the money back? I'll owe you.

- That'll be four hundred. - Right.

What?

Hurry!

- Leaded two-star? - Yes.

Pour some here.

Enough.

Pour it.

Enough. Get the candle.

Close the window. Watch out, you idiot!

- How fast does it burn? - Two centimetres per hour.

Get the curtain.

What will be here later?

I'll grow roses here.

There are no roses without a fire.

That's the way it is.

Ready?

Get out.

Neighbour?

I want you to stop interfering in my private life.

I did it in good faith.

Only the truth could have helped you in that awkward situation.

What truth? We don't do that stuff.

Don't feel ashamed. It's natural and trendy nowadays.

All kinds of girls come over to my place.

Knock three times on the floor and I'll come over to borrow salt.

I don't have any salt.

Zenek! Your guest is coming!

- It's you. - Thanks for opening.

- Is it him? - Yes.

Thanks.

Why are you doing? I told you it was him.

What?

It's Jerzy Dąbczak.

I know.

- He tricked you. - No.

- No. - He kept his promise.

Janek?

Stop nagging, will you? It's fine.

Zenek has temporary and Luśka permanent residence.

It was an honest deal. Ten grand per person.

But it's my flat.

It's between you both. Keep us out of it.

That's right.

I couldn't have registered them without your permission.

You deserve a share. I'll get two hundred.

- That'll be six hundred. - Why?

That's between us.

We should celebrate! Go and buy something.

A bottle.

The nearest store is miles away.

That's not true. There are two new stores nearby.

A souvenir shop and an off-license. Do it as the main tenant.

No.

We have guests.

- No. - Janek!

There are no roses without love.

I want that beautiful gul.

- You don't drink. - Why?

- He can't. - I don't want to.

Just like that railwayman.

- He got 50 kilos of meat for Christmas. - It's a quarter to six.

- He got a washing machine. - A fridge.

- Luśka. - Miss Luśka.

Miss Luśka...

- He got a... - Hush!

- Go on. - You'll miss your bus.

- What? Hush. - Hush.

It's late!

The red bus...

We don't want to miss the bus.

Really? You can sleep here.

- It's ten to six. - Just stay here.

Zenek, let's go!

It's ten to six.

Five to six.

What are you doing here?

Father-in-law? Hello!

Dąbczak is here?

Leave him alone He registered us as tenants.

- Where? Here? - Here.

- Permanently? - Yes.

Then bring it in!

- I say no. - What happened?

- Our house burned down. - My God!

I saved everything. All valuables and furniture.

- What about the TV? - That too.

Thank God.

Just in case, it's Luśka's dowry.

- Mine? Really? - Yes.

- What did you say? - It's my dowry.

- That's important news. - That's important news.

It's Luśka's dowry.

Did you hear that?

- Zenek. - What.

- Are you staying here? - Yes.

One more thing, I need a new house.

- Then I'll take care of you. - It's not possible.

You can't all live here!

- What? - Are you crazy?

- All? I'm not. - He's not.

I'm not. I have to go. It's urgent.

- Is it everything? - Yes, sir.

Bye!

Install the TV. The "Song Parade" is on.

I must have got the wrong floor.

It's the right one! Come in.

What is the meaning of this?

He's still here. You promised me.

His presence is nothing.

It's a piece of cake.

Just in case, it's Luśka's dowry.

We have three square metres more than in our old place.

Don't talk to me!

Turn that down!

Get out!

Come in.

- Jerzy? - Yes?

- May I? - Of course.

Good timing. A western is on.

With that actor. This one!

You see? Wait, wait...

Look.

- Jerzy? - What?

We must do something.

- About what? - About them.

- What do you mean? - You know.

I'm not going to kick out my wife.

Don't worry. She's in her own world when she watches TV.

I like Luśka. I swear. We have fun.

Sit down.

Who else is not prepared? Raise your hand.

- I don't know you. - He's new.

If you're new, you have a right to be unprepared. Only today.

I am prepared.

- Why did you raise your hand? - I know who isn't prepared.

It's Brzęczkowski, Kopytniak.

And that boy in the third desk, I don't know his name.

You're new, so I forgive you.

I don't tolerate ratting on others.

What will you become?

Whoever touches him, will get a lower grade.

- I'm sorry. - It's alright.

It's not easy to tell you this. But it's my duty.

My duty as a man.

- He was just bragging. - I saw it.

- Jerzy was pinching her. - Where?

In the room.

- I mean pinching what? - You know.

I don't.

He was pinching her bum.

I'll beat his brains out.

- You can't do that. - I can!

You'll go to jail for it.

- Where? - Jail. Prison.

Sorry.

Then he'll have his way with Luśka.

- What should I do? - I don't know.

I have to get her away from him.

We have to move out.

Good idea. Why didn't I think of it?

- Call me Janek. - Alright.

- Give me a kiss. - I don't kiss men.

I'll help you pack.

- Just a second. - I'll go.

- I'll catch up later. - Alright.

Darling?

I know you don't want to talk to me. Just listen.

They're moving out!

Yes, but Jerzy will stay.

Zenek and Luśka are moving out For sure.

Zenek went to pack.

I managed to do it. I'll tell you about it later.

I'll help him pack.

He can do it himself. Five o'clock?

It's a date. See you.

- Hi. - Hi.

What do you think?

- Who did it? - Jasiu, thanks.

It's nothing.

You sleep in the kitchen from now on.

- Why? - Just because.

No!

There are no roses without love.

I want that beautiful gul.

Come and help me.

- Jerzy? - What?

- Are you there? - No.

- Let's talk about divorce. - Finally.

Luśka... are you there?

Come over here. I have a TV magazine.

- Jerzy? - What?

I won't come to you and you won't come to me.

I get it. When is Zenek going out?

- Where? - To work.

Don't get excited. She will work, too.

Where did you get a job?

- In a TV station. - As what?

- As an errand girl. - Great!

Very good.

- Jerzy? - What?

We want to get married.

Good. Unfortunately there are new circumstances.

- What circumstances? - I fell in love with you.

You won't divorce me?

Only if I get the other half of your furniture.

I get it. It's a condition.

What do you mean by the other half?

The first is mine already.

The law doesn't say that.

The family code says: "Assets acquired during marriage is joint property".

- Jesus Christ. - Including half of the TV.

You won't cut it, will you?

I want to avoid that.

Give me the furniture and you'll be free.

Luśka, don't trust him. He wants to trick you.

You'll get a divorce on grounds of sexual relationship breakdown.

Don't listen to him.

You had a sex life?

I cheat on you with Zenek every day.

I forgive you.

What does it mean?

It means you won't get a divorce.

Congratulations! You won a gift token!

- Good morning. - Morning.

- I have a parcel for Mr. Dąbczak. - I'll get him.

He's not here. Can I take it for him?

I'll give you an advice note. Go to the post office.

- Who is it from? - The social welfare.

Jerzy Dąbczak.

Your ID, please.

My name is not Dąbczak. He's not at home.

I called him, and he begged me to pick it up for him.

- Is your name Filikiewicz? - Yes.

You know me?

Mr. Poganek talks about you.

- Who? - Your neighbour.

He said that you Mr. and Mrs. Dąbczak and others throw these...

He said he'll join you.

We are one big family. Can I take the parcel for him?

It's not possible. He has to sign.

Can we talk in private?

I'm sure you can help me.

If he authorises you, you can sign it for him.

Yes...

I authorise this man to pick up my parcel.

- Date and signature. - Yes?

Dąbczak.

Janek! What are you doing here?

- Mate! I had no idea. - This is...

That's great! Congratulations!

I'm sorry. I was just going to tell you.

It's Wanda who deserves an apology.

My aunt from Cracow sent it.

A registered letter to the courthouse in Mława,

and a regular one to Mr. Korbaczewski.

You're Mr. Dąbczak!

Why?

- What? - Nothing.

Thank you.

Attention!

The express coach for Mława is

presently leaving from bay number four.

Mothers! Remember your children are precious.

- What are you doing here? - Janek? What are you...

- You followed me? - Why would I?

- Then him? - Perhaps.

- Why? - He must have a lover.

I won't forgive him I'll get a divorce.

Jerzy obtains parcels with baby clothes.

He's a swindler. We'll put him in jail.

He's up to something in Mława. We'll follow him.

Are you dumb? I'm not going to rat on him.

Why are you taking his side?

He'll sell my furniture immediately to afford a lawyer.

I won't have that.

That's your problem, I'll do it.

Janek!

Before you rat on him, I'll rat on you to him.

- Jerzy! - What do you suggest then?

You'll help me divorce him, proving his fault.

Later we'll tattle on him.

A divorce will take forever.

Excuse me.

Which bay does the bus to Mława depart from?

- It just left. - Did it?

What about the next express bus?

- Do you know which bay? - I don't.

Maybe you know?

What's done is done. I have to go. Bye.

- A teacher and a liar! - I changed my mind.

Let the lady get in first.

- No, you don't! - Why?

Let me in. Don't be silly.

Do you think you can harass a lonely girl? Get out!

- But sir... - Don't you "sir" me.

Get out before I lose my temper!

- Luśka! Tell him! - Go away!

I'm Francik, it's a pleasure.

I hate impolite people.

What are you doing? Are you crazy?

I have eggs here!

What?

Where are your manners?

Stop it!

- Are you deaf? - It's not me!

Don't lie to me!

I'm not!

Silence! Pacify that kid!

Be quiet yourself. Leave the child alone.

Stop!

Stop that bus, will you?

It's our bike! After him!

The citizens of Warsaw have to deal with a lot of...

non comme il faut.

I understand. I work for a TV station.

Excuse me!

I've got you!

- He did it! - Did what?

Officer!

Come here!

This is an outrage! I will not have it!

The press will know!

Yes!

I caught the road hog! He ran into me!

Who saw what happened?

Zenek? What are you doing here?

- You saved my life! - It's nothing.

I let you live at my place.

- We live there anyway. - I know.

- If it weren't for him... - You'd better help me with the divorce.

Exactly.

- I've got it. - What?

Ratum non consummatum.

- Where? - An unconsummated marriage.

- That could be the reason. - What?

They didn't have any sexual intercourse.

Think of something better.

I don't want to talk about doing such things with Jerzy.

Why? What things?

We're just speculating. I'll think of something else

732.

You win!

- Try again. - 145.

You win again!

Allow me.

- I'm so sorry! - It's fine, really.

Thank you.

- Your coat number? - Matches, please.

Here you go.

- I'll give you the change back. - Keep it.

I'm looking for a woman who...

a prostitute.

- A whore? - Yes.

- Which one? - What do you mean?

Long Babi, Lolita, or the Flautist?

I'm not looking for a particular one.

- You want the thing... - It's for my friend.

Go and pick one.

My problem is that I can't tell which of them are prostitutes.

For that money it'll be two or three nights.

Definitely not a week.

Five days.

No way. Where?

A new housing estate. It's lovely.

Bonus service is for dollars only.

If you took me to Zakopane or to a foreign country or Bulgaria...

Hey!

Come here.

- I'll do it for free. - For free?

You'll register me in your flat as your cousin.

Impossible. I have no spare rooms.

You think...

I can't afford to buy my own flat? I'd be crazy to move in with you.

No, no, no...

- It's not for me anyway. - So what?

- What if he kicks her out? - No way. She's my cousin.

- What if he wasn't in? - She would have been back.

How will we know when to go upstairs?

If everything goes well, she'll put a vase in the window.

- That one? - That one.

Bastard!

Good, but a bit louder.

- We had a ceremony. - A ceremony?

- I got off work when. - Really?

- A pop singer performed. - A pop singer?

Luśka...

Zenek...

How could you do this to me?

What's going on? You said his wife knows.

Hi, Jerzy.

What are you doing here?

- I live here. - Me too.

This is Mrs. Korbaczewska.

Excuse my contestants. Some of them are a bit undressed.

You'll get used to it.

Have a seat. Zenek, get dressed.

- Sure. - Excuse me.

She's so cute!

- Is she yours? - For the past two hours.

- The father disowned it. - Really?

I said it was mine and I'm a father now.

- By court decision. - In Mława.

That's right.

You'll register the baby as a tenant.

Yes.

Children are our greatest wealth.

Please register the baby and her feeding mother.

Of course.

Your fatherly love will suddenly falter, once they're registered.

It can happen.

Mr. Korbaczewski will adopt his own baby

to move from Mława and register as a tenant here.

- That's the point. - You're right!

Exactly!

I can divorce now! He has a baby, so he cheated on me!

We had a ceremony...

Wait a second. How old is this baby?

- Three months. - We have March now. Right?

What was in March last year?

March.

I didn't cheat on you because we didn't meet yet.

I cheated on somebody else.

- The baby wet itself! - It did.

Come here.

Don't leave me now with a baby.

- Poor thing. - Exactly.

You'd have to pay child support, you know?

Everything he does is legal. It's amazing.

Isn't it?

Here come the new tenants of this flat.

Except me.

Hello.

It turned out you cannot change your flats.

Really?

Our lawyer said that it cannot be done.

Mr. Malinowski will live here and you'll all go to your old flat.

Hello.

A railwayman played checkers with his boss.

The loser had to be on duty on Christmas.

The railwayman won.

And his boss had to work on Christmas.

But he told the railwayman that he couldn't accept his win.

Just because playing checkers was not allowed at the station.

- Where is it allowed? - He didn't say.

- The railwayman had to work. - It's unjust.

That's what the railroad man thought.

His boss told him that he can go work in a courthouse

because there's justice. The station is ruled by regulations first.

That's right.

You have to move out.

Here is an eviction warrant.

This is a warrant for you for the requisition.

It's immediate.

Hurry!

It's me. I heard you knocking.

- When do we start? - What?

- What? You know... - Now.

That's great.

Let's start.

- Why didn't we start earlier? - Exactly.

Let's do it.

Back off!

Janek, please!

- Be careful! - My God!

Calm down!

What a waste!

I beg you! Don't!

You're free to go.

I'll stay here.

- Somebody's waiting for you. - No, no. Thank you.

Where are we going?

You'll find out soon. Try to stay calm.

Well, I'm calm.

- We're going to our house. - I see.

That's where we'll live with all the others.

- Not quite. - Really? Nice.

Don't get emotional. It's bad for you.

Of course.

Go on.

I'll tell you everything.

That guy who changed flats wanted to trick us.

- Wait. Who? - Malinowski.

He knew that the offices would be closed,

and that there would be private flats instead.

The ground floor will go to a diplomat.

The first floor to its current tenant, to him.

- Yes. - You know...

A flat like that for a government price is dirt cheap.

I understand.

- How are you feeling? - Me?

- Yes. - I'm fine.

This is a crucial moment. Just stay calm.

It's repainted.

Malinowski changed flats with us.

As the only private tenant he had the right to buy...

- The second room! Where? - Next to the bathroom.

- Are you pleased? - I'm so happy!

- Can I go on? - There's more?

Come.

No, no...

Yes.

- Ours? - Yes.

We have three rooms!

- You want some fresh air? - Come on.

I'm calm and ready to hear that the fourth room is ours.

- It's ours. - Cool.

Janek! Janek!

- Are you okay? - I overestimated how much I can take.

If this room and that one are ours, don't say it.

At least not now!

Only this one is ours!

Thank God.

Whose is it?

Yogi Baboo!

Great to see you. Are you alright?

I'm glad. I have to go now.

If there's a call from Mława,

please tell Korbaczewski that everything is on track.