Original subtitles

and I count myself amongst them,

Win© Cannot ear to [be Iclle.

It eoule] payeal to the hation

that tne Prime Minister and his brother are implicated

in an outrageous piece of insider dealing.

Bure I think we'll let that one mature 2 little first, dont you?

On the other hand, we need to keep Charles and Henry Collingridge

im the public eye, if possible.

And the press are graterul ror anything in the silly season.

Now, the Prime Minister usually takes the precaution

of packing his embarrassment of a brother somewhere well out of sight

uniell the end of September.

Some rural Frenen slum in the Poitou-Charentes this year, I gather,

where Charlie could get peacefully bloitto

while the Prime Minister saves nis money and holidays at home,

posing as a country gentleman at Chequers.

So it WAS MOS UNrortunate when someone tloped off the tabloids

albout Charles Collingridge*s holiday acddrass.

Bastards. What tine inell has poor ole Charlie cone to deserve that?

Just nas tne bad luck to be my brother, that’s alll

families have someone like Charlie, Someone who cant make it on their own.

Ves, right,

You're right.

lif I stick by Charlie, people willl respect me all the more for ft.

Ie like to think you clic tt ror him, not just for the opinion polls, Hal.

Well, of coursel

happily coinciding.

Or ONGe.!

Arter tine silly season COMME SEUMERCOMMeNeMGeRSeaSONE

-Good morming, Mr Urquihart. morning.

Opposition clic ratiner welll this year.

Apanconed their usual tactic of squabbling in public

ane shooting themselves in the foot,

had a go at us instead. Especially tne Prime Minister, Pm sorry to say.

Most UNSpOrving.

Good morning, Tedeh

So it’s very important that our Party Chairman gets his fine-tuning right

paiore we alll sally off to Brighton.

The essential thing is to present a totally united and confident front

while avoiding any impression OMCOMPLACEMCYA

Tine natural party or government,

but at the same time, 2 listening government.

= ROGeTa -Tihnhank you, sir.

The big banner, anc that’s the spirit ane the theme of this years conference,

prompted ly tne PMs last speech,

is “Pinging the right way”.

=I dont mind “the right way”.

"Finding” Us a bit bloody silly, though, isn't i?

We should have found the way by now, soulen't we?

I mean, wnat are we, the hatural party of government

Or tne In tne bloody wood?

While taking your point, I should say

inet market research Shows US LO smug anc sure of ourselves.

So we bloody wall should bbe. People arant going to for don*t-knows.

-Pernaps “Golng tne right way"? -Rather implies that the party

or someone In the party,

is on the way ourt, dont you think, Terry? With the greatest respect.

Colng, Golng, Gone.

Trinank you, Francis. A good polit.

(leELRUINIG)}

(CHANTING)

ALL: (SHOUTING) Ourel Ounce! Ourel

He's arrived. “Wino?

-Our leader, Elizabetn. Who else? line loroken reed,

ihe Man OF straw,

“Good things or day Degin to droop and cdrowse.”

A party conirerancs can be many things.

Al snow oF Goniidenc2,

Ain AGOMSING Tay pOrAlsal.

Op, as iin tis GaSe, 2 Sanies of auditions

OY (AF ACANUAS GO tne wnrone

Wihilesgiielosimlenders WIENS OUIr Vary eyes;

Micnael Samuels, Environment,

Iinvalligent, sensitive, caring, all in the same sentence, I YOU.

Tinat doesnt fean 2 return to subsistence farming.

What it does mean Is sensitive exploitation of natural resources,

intelligent seliHinterest to motivate long-term gains

in a caring, capitalist concept,

Peer McKenzie, hlealttin.

Peed SC} eine PRESSE) on the system,

enabling our proressionals to do a batter job

for those unalole to fend for themselves financially.

So that how we can say with real contidenca,

-' Carry On, NUFSS. | =(APPLAUSE)

Goel, what an idiot that man is.

Harold Earle, Education,

We've made the schools accountable at last,

We've grasped the nettle anal taken ft on board.

it's ot always been the Tost comfortable wary.

Bue one tning i do know and time willl prove it.

it’s tine Figitt way, Iit's tne rigitt waiy.

Ane Patrick Woolton, Foreign Seeretary.

No one’s more admiring ancl enthusiastic than I am

about the amazing strides taken Dy our friends in Eastern Europe.

Burt hole on. I mean, sorry, Tovarich.

itr I'm golng into the conference chamber to have big hugs with Russian bears,

I'd ratner not leave my six-quns at tne coor, if its all the same with you.

(CHEERING)

Dear old Pawrick. Likes to sound like @ loit of a buccaneer now ana then

pur Ine’s right behing henry Collingricdge alll the way

and that’s exactly what nell tell you so himself if you ask him.

Roger, Nave you got a moment? I'm so sorry, I wont deprive you for too long.

Over ere.

Glad to be rescued. Like being

Dont get me wrong, Francis. Loving every minute of ft,

=the old cotton thrust. -flow’s it coming across?

You can see for yourself. Looks lovely on the telly

lourt tne lobby press arent buying It. They saw Patrick Woolton having a go.

"Leadership Crisis” is the story they want.

Well, we can only co our with the material they give us.

Your assisiant’s doing sterling work over there,

-Tinat girl is Uke gold, Francis. I'm sure.

She’s your mistress as welll, I take ht?

Iis that a privilege exclusive to yourself?

-I said, do you enjoy her body

on an exealusive basis or is she available to others as welll?

rt dont think that’s reallly the kind...

Dont be coy with me. You know I could have you in the gutter any time I like.

-Answer my question. “Well, me and Penny go back a long way.

I Some Ways, were more like prother anc sister,

We allow eacn other a Uttele time ot now and then for good behaviour,

if you follow me.

Now Usten, Francis, it’s not simple. She’s not a... You can’t just...

I'm sure she'd be very flatvered to tnink... If you ask her reallly nical...

Shut Up. Did you really think I wanted her?

-Oops. Sorry, my mistake. -Didn*t you lend her to Patrick Woolton?

That was research. he wanted a bright girl for a bit of research in a hurry.

Bright girls tor research? Where woul te House be without them?

If think he may wane to her again. More urgent researen needs.

Would sine be availalle, cdo you think?

itt's Mot impossilolle.

IP broach ft gently. Leave ft to me. -A\nd I have another task for you.

Just a small delivary job.

(GHAERUNS)

-Moring.

(ALARM BEEPING)

(GEERINGISTORS)

come on, Sleeping Beauty.

Bloody nell, Rog. What co you want?

and hide in your arms, darling.

Ive only just set eyes on the bloody thing because Pennington here

nas only now worked up the courage tO SHOW me.

U's vary bad, Frames,

The poll was taken before the conference, Prime Minister.

rm sure you'll turn it rounc Deirore the week's over,

We've seen ft all before, arier all

Yes, you're a good fellow, Francis. Burt 30%, it’s a hell of a lead to pulll back.

“Right, speak to You Soon. = OMCOUNSEY

Do you know, Elizabeth, I believe our leader is starting to worry.

There’s a major story breaking

and i think Greville MAU want to know abourt itt now.

ANU right, wno’s cead?

Henry Colllingridge.

bina tne nella. “Well, not literally.

Grev, Ive got holed of the secret polllJ You know, the Tories’ own one.

It’s sensational. Theyre 30% belhine

and Collingricdge is about as popular as Captain Hook.

And wno decided to make you a present of this secret Tory poll?

It dont know, itt was left outside my coor.

ANU Figint, I know it sounds weird.

K's genuine. Im Gonvingsd., -VYou've been set up, you silly cow.

Mon, con't lat me near My about ths

UMNUESS You NAVE AlasoluTEeg, stand-yo-in-court roo? it's kosher.

Ane dont you ever get me Ourt Of again

unless it’s acultary in tne Royal Rannuly with photographs!

(DIALLING TONE)

Right,

Kas}

Kas}

Kevin Spence, Central Ofiica, Researen.

(RINGING)

Come on,

Damn!

Well, lovalyy.

Nothing can yOu.

-I' wish you reallly meant that.

cLovely girl. No. NO, ROG...

Dont... On!

ORG

Got a litle surprise.

Winat? What are you up to?

Ol, Roger. You’re not taking cocaine

at 8:00 In the morning at the Conservative Party Conference?

Don’t you think I have antasuic style?

ll think you're barny. “Nonsense.

Tinis Is orilliant stunt

Know where I got i?

Ghosyenomsc lane:

This sturnr is usually only available to the CIA. Yumsyurnnl

What are you trying to co, Kill yourself or what?

Ruoosin. Not 2 lohe oF fe,

It’s just been a bit of a tense week, that’s alll.

it could kiek this stun any time I liked.

it tall you winart. Get this week over.

We'll go to a health farm ior ten cays.

No drinks

And shag ourselves silly. Flow alpourt ung?

That would! be lovely. iif only you really meant ft.

it do. Yourlll see.

= Listen, Pen. “Now win?

It’s @ lott clelicate, this.

Remember when you had that bit of a thing with Pat Woolton?

Well, Id harelly forget that, would if? What @ character!

-You Uked him, though, didnt you? “Wheat a maniac. he was all right.

“Really good fun. =fle’s still carrying a torch for you.

Toran? Js tinert winart Ine calls it now?

you'd like to have dinner with lim.

rle’s a bit shy about asking you lninnself.

re ones put his hand in my knickers when we sat at a table in Langan’s.

Yealn, welll...

it sai¢ We pass it on.

Pimping now, Is tt?

Jesus Christ, Roger!

Don't you care about me at alll? Dont you care what I do?

An, Pen. Or course I do. I dich*t think you'd be upset. I thought you liked lim.

That's hot tne polme. rt went with ini because I wanted to,

Not because you promised someone a javourl

An, listen, Pen, it’s not like that at aul. I wish I didnt have to ask you.

It wish I could be evarything to you, pure It Gant.

to do a thing like this

unless my arse was on the Une.

Ane iit Is.

it don"t know wnat Pin going to co ane that’s the truth.

-You do believe me, don"t you? -Yes, I do believe you.

=’s that stun, isnt i? -Partly.

I mean, t's... k's not as though you hate the man, Pen. You liked fim.

Ane you know tf tt was me, Ie cde anything in the world for you.

il love you, Pen. You know that. “Will you just shut up, Rog?

Winy/?

Winart’s the matter? lin sorry. Winart have It saicl?

On,

Never mine. here, have mine. It nate tine Stuf

Martie Storin, “me Garoniale,

“Ol, YYSS, Too -Don't pretend you recognise my name.

“Well, I do, actually. “Well, good.

Il wanted to eneck 2 couple of facts with you.

ATS YOU SUTS You Walt me? Imm in research, not the press office.

il dic say races, Kevin. -AN, Yas.

is this a genuine report irom your deparimenk?

Not a fake?

-Where did you get this? -(GJ.S. That’s you, isnt it?

IRCalmOOSSIbWACISGUSSEIMISS

Ir someone knew id leakee those Tgures, confirmed they were genuine...

“Please don"t drag me into tis.

It’s alll right, Kevin. rt dont give away my sourcas.

ike IS @ genuine report, isnt KK?

Wing's tine circulsuion?

Very United, I take itz

Just cabinet ministers and five senior people at Smith Square.

The Deputy Chairman ancl four senior cirectors.

Please cont ask me anything else.

No, I won't. Youve been very helprulJ

Stay i touan.

IG ratiner Mott...

-Franeis! =Patrick, Of you to spare the time.

Blooely nell. The Chief Whip says ne Wants an urgent word in private,

you make wine.

Since you phoned, I've been wondering what Pve done wrong.

You know, I cant think of anytning,

Bloody depressing, thet, looked at one way.

Suill, I suppose it’s better than

finding your picture in the Mews of tne World, eh?

it need to take your mine, Patrick,

And this is going to have to be one of those mestings that never took place.

AU rightt. If this ts what I think it fs, it’s come sooner than I thougiit.

We're In trouble, Patrick,

And tnere’s a view around that this is not a passing phase.

This view says that the proolem is the Prime Minister,

His unpopularity is dragging the party down. And he rafuses to see the danger.

re’s insisted on holeing the Dorset by-election at conference week

and ttt looks as tif tins is 2 loacl miscalculation.

You understand, this is not necessarily my personal view.

It’s the view Ive been askecl tO PU WO you.

Wino ny, Francis?

-One or two senior colleagues. JJUSt ONS OF two?

Three, in absolute conticlence. Three very senior colleagues.

ANUL right. Go on.

you think henry sul has Winer it takes to be Prime Minister

ane if he ware...persuaced to ratire,

would you be interesuact in taking his placa?

Bloocly nell, Francis. You dont mess about, co you?

It think you know iI prefer plain speaking and plain dealing, Patrick, as you do.

AU rigint. Lets analyse the situation.

Pirst of alll, have we really got @ problem?

Yes, tthe polls are bloody terrifying, youre quite right to take soundings.

Second, do we have to do something abourt it or will tt just go away?

yinat fs, can we ride ourt this bad paten and then swing the country round?

up to the Prime Minister.

My view is ne does not have wingit it takes

anc we vouers don't tink Ine nas.

lin my view, ti he leads us Into another general election, we'll get stuffed.

Between you and me, that’s probally the majority view on the back benches.

Burt hf we get rd of Inti as early as this,

we'll look like a bunen of colonels in a banana republic.

I dont want to go down in history as the Idi Amin of Poulton le Fylde.

Well, yes. Quite. But you are Still interested in the leadership?

in absolute conricenea, of course I bloody ann.

it stood against Henry when Margaret left.

Ana t still think If was tne best canclicdate,

And tt stood again, I'd be looking for your support, Francis.

Bure (e's early.

No, we heed a few montns

tO Get the pulblic used ‘to tthe Idea of a change of leadership.

MOV ERO ORSO OMT alnGawveMlGlookdliixekassassilnss

and the whole party will be in plecas.

rll say one thing, Francs. Wim dann glad it’s you that’s hanelling this.

rel trust witin a job like this.

Thank you, Patrick, I appreciate that.

it aporeciate your frankness as welll!

rll continue to take soundings and keep you fully informed.

Good on you, Francis. As long as we keep that slimy little Samuels out.

Well, yes, quite. Alnsolurtely. Good talking to you, Patrick.

-You won't miss the party lawer? “Wild horses, Franedis. Wild horses.

it don“t suppose you've got any wild women coming?

You'd oe surprised.

Tine man’s a lou, of course. A lout,

a lecher, an anti-Semite, @ racist and a bullly.

more intelligent than he seems.

Ane ine is, we mustn't forget,

rler Majesty's Secretary or State for Foreign Affairs.

We mustn't make tne mistake of underestimating Patrick Woolton.

You call my secretary any time if You want to follow any of this up.

Thank you, I wil Well, bye for now, then.

“Oh, hello.

-You've been neglecting me. -You mean, not pestering you?

I feel slighted. Was Michael Samuels illuminating?

Oddly enough, not nearly as illuminating as you.

I’ astounced ito hear ft. -No, I dont think you are. So...

How are things going? Are we having a good conference?

Apart trom your neglect or me, very good indeed.

That's hot my inrormeation.

My inrormation ts you're in ceep trouble.

Really?

-Not you personally, of course. e[inait’s a ralict.

-Il was wondering tf we could chat? “Were you, Mattile?

Ive been getting the impression tinat this whole conference Is in cole.

That it’s alll abourt something else entirely.

I dont reel as if Ive had a reall conversation with a real person here.

Ane you think Pll decode the conference for you? Rather a tall order, Mattie.

iM seule just ror a Gna.

At least you're a real person. You are a real person, arent you?

On, yes. Irn a real person.

Som

I'd like vary much to spend some time with you, Matitie, as I think you know.

But tis evening, unioruneaely Pm otherwise engaged.

rm having a little drinks thing. Some of my guests are shy of journalists.

They dont like people to see winat theyre Uke when theyre relaxing.

Really? Ane wiho would that be?

Marttie, you can’t nme to tall you tart.

-Who’s coming? Tell me one guest. -Your proprietor, for one, Mattie.

Benjamin Landless? is he in Brighton?

Oh, we get alll the rirfratr here. You'd be surprised.

WOMAN TON ERAS Telaonone call for Matte Storin.

Dont you think you'd etter get that?

Olh, rigit. Well...

-See you latter in the week, perhaps. =I hope so, Matttie.

(GENTLY HUMMING Wide Or Vile VALK MES)

rlello, Mattie Storin here.

Jonn, sorry, tts a lott of a serum here. You got the story alll right?

“Ves, We got It. alls @ brilliam: story or want?

-Yes, it’s a brilliant story. “Ana?

-And we're hot running tt. “What? Let me speak to Preston.

ne knows alll abourt fit,

hie won't run the sory Dpecause he thinks you've been set up.

Ive enecked that survey. It’s genuine.

Cam N@ GD@AK tO YOUr SOUNCEE? Gan I speak to your SOUREE?

Dont be stupid, John, of course you can't. Let me speak to Preston.

He’s in a meeting, Marttie. Ane look, it wouldnt do any good.

We've backed the government alll the way. Anal we have to stick with them now.

altt’s not just you that’s been lat ort =Gravillle’s been fixed, hasn't he?

He’s there with you, isn’t he? Ask hin who got at him. Ask lim.

itt was Benjamin Landiless, wasn" it? Wasn't i?

Hole on a moment, Marttitie, it nave 2 call on tne otner line.

Hole on for wha? There’s nothing to talk about, is there?

-On, Gol That's all I need. I'm so sorry. Please allow me to...

Pernaps not. Only make it worse. Um...

-Oln, Lord. Oln, Lore. im trouble again. alt’s alll right. Oimitamissedk

Are you sure? It was only vodka.

Very pure. My meotner-in-law cleans silver with vodka, you know.

May I, umn, buy you a drink, Miss...

Mattie, Mattie Storin. No, let my editor buy you one, Mr Collingricdge.

Two large vodkas and tonics, please. ics anc lemon,

You know wine I arn, then? Amazing. Amazing.

al am a journalist, Mr Collingridge. -Call me Charlie. Everyone else does.

So, wnat are you doing in this cen of tinleyves?

Not alll thieves. Still a few good blokes about.

like your brother? Exactly. Salt of the earth.

That’s nica. Ia heared ine ratiner SOMMOMCISOM ME CRY OUE

No, no. fle lets people tink tat. brother in the world, Hal.

looks airter me, know wheat I mean? Likes to do good by stealitih.

Fnougin said. Ene oF svory.

-Cheers, to your very good Inealtitn.

lore, you are a prety girl Oh, NO offence.

Imve got a daugitter your age, you know. Lovely girl.

Lovely jaca. Never, never see her.

Own vault. Weaver uncer tne tningy.

Do miss her, though.

No, no! Absolutely not! Get the nell out. Do I make myself clear?

Lore, I cant stane that man. “Dont come ack till tomorrow,

large whisky, and be quick about [ft

It gotta Go to this goddamn champagne reception.

it need something to line my gut with.

eCharlie! how are you? -Evening, Ben.

One ror hin, too, I suppose. And you, young lady?

Whert are you staring at? is my zipper undone, or what?

-Amn I supposed to know you? “We havent met. I ann your employee.

rial the hacks in Brighton are getting wrecked at my expense tonight.

lin fact, you've just been influential in getting one of my stories spiked.

lis tina so? What was it? “Knit Your Man A Willy-Warmer For Christmas’?

No, ft was that one albourt tne Tories going 3@ points behind.

Ne

You're, ull, Minnie what’s-her-name.

Mattie Storin. =\/@8.

Damn gooe Stony.

Wrong damn paper. What do you think we are, /ne New Statesman? Cheers.

An! Thanks, young man. Keep the change. Have one yourself.

that drive chaps to drink.

Uh, could you cope with another little one, my dear?

Yes. Winy not?

Evening, my dear. Jolly good clo. “Well, thank you.

Not here yet.

it tole the bugger, “Any more off tnatt anc you're for Northern Ireland.”

It dare say that called [nis blurr.

Wasn't seen on his feet again till 1987.

rle’s Not ere yet.

-MecKenzie’s wie’s a genius with a wolk. lis that S07

It used to think the wok solved everything,

our Mow It Know otnerwwise,

You really must allow ime to give you my recipe for brill, Brill is a fish.

-Mr ONeill. And how are you?

“Never beter, Mrs Urquinar. SGOOdR

We've put the boys down for Wellington. What do you think?

it dont know. A lott dear, isnt tt? Is ft wort ft?

Miss Guy! Elizabeth Urquinart.

Really? You write the PMs speeches?

itf they Chuck me out, f’d be Uke @ lobotomy for Hal.

Ane that’s entirely confidential you understand.

excuse me. Hayrever,

-Ben! Good to see you. Never mine that,

Winart tine hell are you boys playing at?

No, I dont want any of these stupid little things.

Listen, I put the whole damn chain of papers behind your lot

and you still manage to cock ft up.

Ben, we cant talk here. Walls Ihave ears anel alll tart.

To nell with that. I didnt come AO OM SoOlmeatapess

Wihere’s tne lbathroonn?|

-Oln, it’s Over there. Great. Let's go.

EXCUSE Ime.

Irve seen that latest poll of yours.

“Girl of mine got hole or it It’s just a poll, Ben.

Bullshit, my friend. its disastrous.

Burt cont worry. it told Greville Preston to pulll ft.

Al. Tinank you, Ben.

Ie Ul leak, fourt not till after the Dorset by-election.

ine Prime Minister willl be vary grateful.

Tinart Uinnp click! Where cloes tt leave me?

i wanna buy Transglobal Newspapers.

it wanna buy two IV regions.

Uncer Maggie, I knew tne score.

Everyone facing the same way, everyone defencing freecom’s frontiers.

Everything was Up for grabs. No lame ducks and no sore losers, right?

Now my lawyers are talking Monopolies and Mergers Commission.

And this government won't back me Up because they havent got the guits.

What sort of country Is it when a man cant spend his money how ine likes?

Very true, Very true. Ane very welll put, if 2 may say so, Ben.

Serew “welll put”. What are we gonna do about it?

Dump Collingridge.

Holy sinied

You reallly mean that, dont you?

Tinis crisis of conificence isnt about policy. It’s about leadership.

I'm vary fone of henry Collingricdge.

Ane i respect hin, in many ways.

But this country needs a strong right-wing leader

with the courage to derend freedom.

nel ineraase iit

Exacily. That's the way tne whole of Europe’s going.

Tinls used to be a country fit for heroes, Ben.

Bxplonensmoolclienss merchant acventurers.

We want a leader who's prepared to let his dogs off the leash.

-Give us a little room to run, nul? Quite.

We want a leader who’s prepared

to purt himself albourt a lott, give °em some stick.

it like the things you say, Francis.

So...wino cid you have in mind?

Patrick Woolton would give us winert we wart, I think,

-You dont want ft ror yourselir? “what, me? Oh, No, NO, No.

inn just the Chief Whip, Ben. It just keep the troops in order.

Chie? Whips have mace te to the top before.

Well, If it ever cic come to that,

they didnt tie you up in tape, Ben.

Know you woul, Francis. Know you would.

OK, so let’s do ft to Colllingricdge.

Run that poll story fora start, hulh?

Irve got work to co. First edition in 4@ minurtes.

Ie betver make a phone call Nice party, Francis.

(GNEEZANS)

Tnat’s enough about me. hlow about you?

Would you be into quickies at all, Amanda?

Woulle! I [ne finto wine?)

(ORGASMIC MOANING)

So... Me Pariy’s Over.

It's a quict night. Our fortunes prosper well.

‘The Foreign Secretary tinds succour trom the harsh sivairs oF steite

In the Sore Tragrancs of a daughter of the game.

One for tne arenives|

ir Ine Gli] fount Know Mt

Ama] all tne while, Landless’s armlles are labouring for me

nrougn tne Gankmness, towanras cain,

eOMUNG tne SLORY.

A) laadar out of touan,

A man of straw GlUChINgG at SERAWS,

mis future Glosing iin front of hin UKE 2 fist

Who would be a leader iin ins wicked worked?

Sorry about this, Prime Minister.

We thought you'd better see Tt EISESOONMASHOOSSIDICS

Oh, Graham, not at breakfast, surely.

Hal was up till four working on his speed.

So were we, Mrs Collingricdge.

rm aunullly sorry put ft is vary serious.

lif you read the paragraph I've marked, Prime Minister,

It’s not just a leak. it's a personal attack.

"A leading minister commented, ‘Our basically excallent position

“is belng undermined oy the leader's lack of appeal.’

PAnother senior figure party suggested

inant henry Collingricdge would ba invite to stand cown

“ror the good of the party.”

Wino’s doling this? Who Is i?

Are they trying to destroy us alll?

it Want to know who this is, Gralham. I nave to know.

Shall i give Lore Billsborougin a call, sir?

VESHING!

No, not Billsborougin.

Get Francis Urquhart over. Have hin in my suite in hatf an hour.

Yes, Prime Minister. Erin...

in view or this report and bearing in mind the Dorset by-election today,

I you'll want to adjust your speech to conference this afternoon?

Noy

ll reallly feel that we sould... -itt was a good speech at 4:@®@ a.m.

and it’s still a good speeen

(TELEPHONE RINGING)

-Urquinart. Par are, Par Woolkion.

“Patrick, wnat can I do ror you? You lait your ease and took mine.

“Or I nope you cid, Could you Enea? -flold on, Patrick.

My dear chap. Pra trightrullly sorry.

Shall I bring tt round?

“Na, Tt on my way. Tio muinukes. -Bye.

John, winert tine hell is tt alll about? First you pull my story,

nen YOU prim it without my name on It

and a “let’s get Colllingricdge” slant. What's going on?

Inf It tall you winart I knows, do you promise not to bite my head off?

AU right. Irn sorry about last night burt I was just so bloody angry.

Ii know it’s not your raul. Come on, what happened?

Well, I don’t know exactly.

Ole Grav was on the phone for about half an our,

Tinen he came our very pleased with himself.

igh drama. “Kill the trom pagel”

Grev says lne’s been checking out your story with some of his contacts

and it stands up airter alll

“SQ, INO WHOLE Ic? He aid.

Ben Landless was here last nigint.

Urquhart had a party. landless was @ guest.

Wino else was tinere?

Allthe big boys. Woolton, Samuels, Billsborougnh.

“It’s really happening, John.

to junk Collingricge.

-So stupid of me, Patrick, =No harm clone.

-Erm, good party, Francis. =Glad you enjoyed ft.

“Seen tne papers this morning? =V/es, Bac! business.

Bac Tor some, Not so bac tor otners.

-KXeep In toucn, Patrick, “Right.

(TELEPHONE RINGING)

Ves. Of course,

Francis, tne Prime Minister would like to see you.

“Wino fs it? Who's betraying me?

(URQUHART CLEARS THROAT)

Wino?)

it''s Teddy Billsboroug)n.

Are you sure?

No one else ft coulle Ibe!

Mh terrloly Sorry.

‘inank you, rranels.

You're é) Goodin an

If the “8@s lhac! to the decade of confrontation,

rene “O@s will be seen, I think, as tine cecace of conciliation.

IiinewdecacdeRoimeoopenarionr

Tine cecade of maturity.

Stiling dissent is not going to helo us find The Right Way.

Surely events in Eastern Europe nave taught us that much, at least.

Tine British open clemocratic process

nas been an inspiration to seekers ater ireedom in Poland anc in Russia

and in hungary ane in Czechoslovakia.

And i, ror one, arn proud or wheart.

Itt ts only tnrough frank and oven exchange of views

dnat good government ks possiola,

rrank anc open excnange of views in an atmosphere of trust.

Paleface anc clearly agitated,

in his keynote address tO Conference this afternoon, comme,

tne Prime Minister gave wihiat most observers agree

was a lacklustre perrormance.

Good morning to you, Miss Storin.

Anel tO you.

iis kt a good morning? 1/83,

Naturally, the resultt is @ little disappointing.

Burt it’s hardly cheering news for Labour, either, is it?

By-elections are the cnanee ror Tolk to let off steann a it,

-Funny things happen in Dorset. -VYou're not worried, then?

Oln, we shall be taking fe VE WESCHIOUSIVA

It may be we're hot geting our message across in the right wary.

-Can I quote you on wnat? Yes, I think you may, Miss Storin.

Mr very glad It bumped into you, Martie.

Because tnere’s anouner piece of news that’s going to break.

Ane i know youll handle tt responsilaly.

lord Billsboroughy

(RERORGERSES HOU MMN GTO UW ESTHONS)

No commenncl

“In What was cdeseriloed Dy a senior government spokesman

Pas a fit of pique and a fit of panic,

Fine Prime Minister toils afrrernoon

"sacxed his Party Chairman Lore Billsborough,

Pune greatly loved and longest-serving member of his government.”

Pique anc panic.

On, yes, Inn sure tt was.

Bure I thougiit that girl of yours

handling things with responsibility?

Pin sure sine clic, Elizabeth. I'm sure sine clic.

rin very much atraid soneone must have been getting at her eclitor.

She's proving to be rather a treasure, isnt she?

You could say that.

-Aned you trust ner? =/es.

Up to a polnt.

iif you wanted to be quite certain of her loyaltty,

DerNaDpS One Hight when you're In town and I'm here in the country...

Well, I should quite understand, Francis.

Pll leave that up to you entirely.

Thank you, Elizalbetin. (TELEPHONE RINGS)

Urquinare.

Yes, of course, Prime Minister.

Ves, yas, of course. At once.

=Wwell, welll, well =I hope he isn’t going to sack you?

He'd batter not bloody welll try.

(CAR HORN HONTGING)

ine Ooservar rang tine Press Orifice today

about a story they say they re going to run tomorrow.

What swor? all Still cant oelieve it.

They say my brother Charlie's Deen buying shares in companies

just before they benefit trom government decisions and making a killing on them.

It mean, you know Charlie. He hasnt the wit to do a thing Uke that.

Charlie? OF course Ine hasnt)

Amel... Well, Ine has his weaknesses, hlall I know you won't mind my saying that.

Burt he'd never do anything criminal

‘inank you, rranels.

God, it’s such a relief to talk to someone witin 2 loft oF...

Francis, you do believe that rt know nothing whatever about this?

Aosolurtelly, Hall. Without the slightest reservation.

You're a good man. Well, they say they've got documentary evidence.

-Bank statements, brokers’ recalpts. -But nothing that connects it with you?

Not as far as I know, put what else would they assume?

it? he’s been getting inside invrormetion, who else would give tt to him?

Goel, Francis, What an I going to do?

You're know you're innocent. Go on the offensive.

Tell them you'll sue and go ahead and do itl

Set your solicitor onto it today. Where’s your brother now?

I told hin to take the phone Off the nook anal not answer the coor,

Well have to clo pstier tam tert,

When Jie Qoservar litts the streets, he'll be under siege.

Listen, there’s a place we use in Kent for the dipsos and druggies

on the back benenes, sort of sae house eum clinic cum asylum.

Iii SOFFY (Ulta. oll know,

rll get Tin Stamper to fix it

Can someone who knows lim De there, too? Not you, of course.

-Anne willl go, he’s fond of liner. Ig] ratiner it wasnt ner.

Praneis, we're alll Ine has now.

Right. She'd better get going straight away.

Dont worry about tinis placa, hall Theyre very kind.

Aosolutely ciserest. Dr Christian’s a very sound man.

itt may be a blessing In disguise jor Cnarlie.

rrancis, you're a tower or strengtn. T dont know how to thank you.

Dont embarrass me, Hall. rm just doing my job.

(ALL TALKING At ONCE)

it con't know winatt’s happening)

No! Get away!

=GoO on! Go on! “Get away, you people!

-A commen for the press, Charlie? Get out] Get ourttl

Where are they taking you, Charlie?

(GENTLY HUMMING Wide Or Vile VALK MES)

(ALL CALLING OU)

flow load is tt, Franeis? =I"ve seen Worse.

Oh, Gome on. No one’s ever been this low iin the polls

ane come back to win an election

Ne TFS, Give em something to ary about.

however this comes out, ru make sure the world knows

what € hell of a man you are to have in your corner,

“Right. What are we up agains? “The Ooserver doesn't implicate you.

IN Ul blow over, hal.

Tinese things always cdo. What else?

There's a run on the pound. Doesnt mean a thing.

Itt may bother the teenagers in the City witin tine Porsches ana the Filovaxes

out the average voter couldnt care less,

Leadership erisis? That cratinous chwart Bairsted

says It’s going to rores @ leadership contest.

DO You want me to lean on inim?

PU irighiian the wits Out Of tine little soa

with the greatest pleasure, if you like.

Well, ne’s pulblicly declared now.

Get him to publicly retract. Mumiliate the little bastarcl.

But no. I think you're right, Prime Minister.

Let hi Gomme onto tne pune. Knock him down anc trample him.

Ane cdo the television interview on Wednesday?

Mel Say SO, Yes.

insist they leave this Mencdox shares nonsense till the last five minutes.

By then, everyone willl be rooting for you.

ott of irrelevance, which is what it is.

Yes, damm*it. Thank you, Francis. We're not finished yet.

Right, stand by, Siucla, (ease. Counting Vi iin tam seconds.

Vary guise, Vary quiet, joleasa, mou, FIA, TOUP 2.

PAUL right? Ves, fine,

Prime Minister, for the last few minutes of this interview,

could we turn to the allegations printed in this week’s Oaservar

aloout possible improper share dealing by your brother, Mr Charles Collingridge?

-Withn pleasure. -Earlier you issued a statement

denying any connection of your family witn the matter

and suggesting that there might have been a case of mistaken identity.

That's Correct. Quite obviously, it’s not for me to explain

Vine Observer's extraordinary mistake.

AUT cam tell you ks tat Oi my reamily has anything to co vaio fe

You nave my word of honour on tae (LAUGHTER)

‘The family’s solicitors have Initiated proceedings against Zine

and will cdo so against anyone

who repeats these false anc malicious statemenrs.

eTinank you. We'll bear that in mind. -That would be vary wise of you.

Now, you and your brother deny

that efther of you opened an accommodation address

=A PACMNGCON MEWSAGOMEST SI aeSHCOMEGIA

But on Monday of tks week,

Jane Haréston of our stair Yisiiad] ine aofass

enna alle to pnotograpn a numnoer of anvallanes LO Your orounen.

Now, (OOK NECK.

ne wirse Clearly marked ane Oirtroman Union Bank,

ne bank that bought and sole) ine Mando snares,

ine secone is addressed to your brother

from tine Conservative Party sales and literature offica in Smith Square.

Well, I really cannot see any relevance in this at alll.

Quite clearly this Is a casa of mistaken identity.

-And I co have to WarN YOU... -Prime Minster, like you,

we thought that Charles Collingridge might well be a common name,

rtinat there migiit be some other Charles Collingridge

Wino was able to take Improper advantage of secret government decisions.

Bur oddly enough, there’s only one Charles Collingridge

listed im the London telephone directory.

Your orotner.

Prime Minister, we've almost come to the end of the programme.

lis there anything else that you would like to say?

Well, witihn the Prime Minister declining to comment any further

on his alleged involvement in the Mencox shares sean¢al

that’s alll from Us at Worla, Tonigune, might.

(TELEPHONE RINGING)

Urquinare.

it hag a feeling it migint be you.

IM Sorry to disturb you at home.

Burt I'd be very graterul if you'd give me a few minutes before we go to prass.

Not on tne telepnone. You can come here, tf you like.

Id prefer it tf you cidmt tell your colleagues where youre going.

rll sae you lin ten minutes.

re cant survive this, can ne?

it shall be spencing the next few days

rallying all the support ior the Prime Minister that I can get.

Of the racorel, Mearttie, e's NOt going to be easy.

Do you think he tloped his brother off alDourt those shares?

It cant believe that henry Collingridge could do a thing like that.

IMve always considered nim @ totally honourable man.

=|Uney “Burt, Mattie?

Not quite up to lis job. -Mattie, you might very well think that.

You know I couldnt possibly commen¢t.

I reallly Uke talking to you. -Of course you do.

You love trying to tempt me Into Incliscretions.

It know, lourt it’s more than that.

With Samuels and Earle I get the party Une.

You talk to me like another intelligent human being.

It like talking to you.

Min interested! Im you.

You fine that strange?

It fine it vary flakrering.

Because I happen to tink you're ly Tar the ablest man in this qovernment.

Ol, No, Ho, no. Youre too kine, Marttie.

It think you underestimate yourself ana that’s a shame.

Underestimeae myseli? In what way?

You underestimate your ability anc your capacity for power, I think.

Ane f think you uncderestimerte your personal attractiveness.

Now, that is alosurel, Martttie. You cant expect me to fall for that.

irr ole enougl to be your fatiner.

Pernaps that’s something to co with tt!

Oddly enough, I always wanted! a daughter.

My witre and I have no children.

What a very unusual interview tis as turmec! Out to (oe.

Pernaps we should... No, I must just say this.

You musin*t uncerestineate your abilities.

Really.

You know you could go mucn further than you have done, dont you?

Do you think so?

If YoU put your mine to it,

it tink you could achieve anything you wanted.

You fnigiie think that, Martie.

rin afraid I couldn't possibly comment.