All language subtitles for trailer.park.boys.s03e05.dvdrip.xvid-sfm

- I need you to do me
a huge favour.

- I can't buddy, there's no dope around.
- I'm not looking for dope

Meowenstein drank garbage
juice. He's got the shits.

I've got to get him to the vet
. But here's the problem.

Rush are coming to the Metro Centre.
- No way!

- Yessirree Bob.
- Rush are your favourite band

- I know.
I need you to go down there,

get in line and get me a ticket.
They're gonna sell out Ricky

This is all the money I have
. Just enough for one ticket

- Okay.
- Can you do that for me?

- Calm down. It's not like
it's Helix or something.

Helix was a wicked concert

I sold a lot of dope at that
concert. They had good lyrics.

Give me an R O C K! And th
e crowd yells "ROCK" really loud

Now that's a fucking concert.
- I'm not giving anyone a fucking R!

- Rush just don't do
stuff like that.

Their lyrics are about how trees
are talking to each other,

how different sides of the brain
work and outer space bullshit.

- Give me a fucking R!
- Why don't you guys get

some tickets and come with me.
We could all go.

- I'd love to but there's no
dope. I told you that.

- Who cares about dope? Alex
Lifeson, Geddy Lee, Neil Peart

I know he's gonna do
that fucking drum solo.

- Calm down buddy.
Calm down. Calm down.

Just promise me
you can do it. Just say

I promise you Bubbles that I
will get you a ticket, please.

- I promise you'll have a ticket
and I'll try to find some dope

- Alright, let's do it.

- Help me clear this stuff off
the car and we'll go get Julian.

- I'm glad I had my helmet on.
Hey Julian.

- Hey man.

- I need a couple of bucks
for gas buddy.

- What! Hey?!

- Hey! Hey! What?

Holy!

- Hi! I just got a fine
from the city

for having recyclables
in the garbage.

Do you, um, remember that little
chat we had Jim about you

doing your job and me not firing
you? Do you remember that?

- My ex-wife Barbara owns
Sunnyvale Trailer Park.

And in a way, uh, she, uh...

- Well, we gotta do
what Barbara tells us to do.

- More or less.

Uh, Randy and I have been
planning a camping trip

for a long time, Barbara.

And I promise I'm going to hav
e all this sorted out by Monday.

It's idiots like that

- Get the fuck out of my way
Lahey, you fucking idiot.

- That don't recycle.

- Maybe you should be doing your
fucking job instead of going

camping, toasting marshmallows
with fucking Randy.

Did I mention he was trying to
buy dope off me this morning

- Right. No camping trip, Jim.

Not with Randy, or drugs, or
liquor until you have sorted all

n this garbage in time for the
collection on Monday and the

you can go camping.

- Babs!

- Lahey, can you please ge
t the flying fuck out of our way

We gotta go get Rush tickets
. - Hey Ricky! Ricky!

- You hang on little buddy
. I'll be right with you.

Awesome boys.
Thanks for doing this for me

- No problem buddy. I'm goin
g to get your ticket right now

- Thanks guys.
I love you guys.

- Love you too, Bubs.
- Talk to you later buddy.

- See ya.

- What the fuck are you doin
here? Following us or something?

- Sorry I was following you,
but I have a brilliant idea.

t If we take dope and sell it
at the Rush concert we can sell i

for double the price
and make a ton of loot, man.

It works every time.
So can you hook us up?

- That's a great idea. I got a
little bit of dope here for ya

- That's cool.

- There's no fucking dope
in town you idiots.

- Julian, you've got to be abl
e to get dope.

We can take the cruise money and
double it up, man. We can do it.

- Alright boys here.
Get us all some Rush tickets

- Nice.
- Are you sure about this?

- I want the change back too
boys. Don't fuck this up.

- That's cool.

- I think I can get us
some dope man.

- Where the fuck
are you going to get dope?

- How's it going? You guys got a
package for Corey or Trevor Lahey?

- Fuck, I hate buying dope
from cops man.

They way overcharge every time.
It doesn't even feel like a pound.

- It's fine.
Let's just get out of here

Ah, man. Fuck! Aw fuck!

- We're down here
at the Metro Centre

where the tickets are going fast
for the upcoming Rush concert.

Hey, what are your names guys?
- Uh, that's Corey.

- That's Trevor.
- How goes the search for tickets, gang?

- It's okay man. We kind of have to
get tickets, we have no choice man.

Like, you know.
- That's just great guys.

Good for you guys.
- Hey man, can we do some shout outs?

- I don't think so. Just a reminder
Terry, coming up in the next half hour,

the ultimate Rush fan contest.
Coming up later.

Now Earthshine
from Vapourtrails.

- Those idiots ruined
our little camping trip Randy.

Well, we're going to ruin
their little concert.

- Alright Ricky, don't mention
anything about the dope out here man.

We'll make way more
selling it in there.

Alright?
- Okay man.

- Ready, Mr. Lahey.
- Go Randy.

- Ricky, you idiot.
You camping trip ruining dick.

Saying stuff you're
not supposed to say.

- Come on, Randy,
Randy, Randy, boys, boys.

- Yes, I'll have all the res
t of your tickets please.

Randy, that's enough boy.

- Ricky, Julian,
where's my fucking ticket.

- Sorry Bubbles,
she's all sold out.

- Oh my fuck,
are you kidding me?

- What the fuck
are you doing Lahey?

y
- These tickets are not for sale boys, but if you help Rand

and I clean up a little garbage,

then I just might give you
a couple.

- Oh my God. Come on.
- Let's go Randy.

- See you back at the park
there boys.

- You fucking dicks. You bette
r fucking watch it Randy.

- Ricky, you fucking promised me
you'd get me Rush tickets.

- It wasn't my fault Bubbles
. I'm sorry.

- It is your fault. This could
affect our friendship, you know.

- Bubbles don't talk like that

- Cocksucker!

- Boys, somebody's got can
s

and fucking bottles mixed up
in the same bag.

- This is bullshit. Can't we get
tickets from scalpers or something?

- I already tried. No go man
, so stop your fucking whining

and let's just get
this over with.

Boys, relax, we're going to make
a lot of money tonight.

- Julian this thing isn't
about money you know.

Don't you guys fucking
ever think of the music?

That's what this was about
. Remember "Closer to the Heart"

Remember how good
the fucking concert was in 87?

g
- That was awesome man. Remember we kicked out durin

"I Like to Rock", then we
wrecked the Dartmouth ferry.

That was fucking wicked.

- That was fucking April Wine,
Ricky.

But that was
a good fucking concert.

- So you wanna be
Alex Lifeson's guitar tech

Tell me, what's his real name?
Call now.

We're gonna take
the first four calls.

,
- Oh my God boys, it's Zivojinovich. Son of Life

Lifeson, that's
his fucking surname.

I'm gonna be Alex Lifeson'
s guitar tech.

- It's off to the phone line
s now to see if we have a winner

in the ultimate Rush
fan contest.

Hi, who's this?
Do you have the answer?

- Hi I'm Randy.
Yes, the answer is Zivojinovich.

- Randy, you're right.
Good for you.

Zivojinovich, which means
son of life.

Lifeson, that is his last name
. Guess what Randy, you're going

- You've got to be
fucking kidding.

- That cheeseburger
eating bastard.

- Holy fuck Mr. Lahey, we won!

- Yeah, we're still on the air
guys. Congratulations.

You and a friend are going
to attend the Rush show.

Have a great night,
but more than that...

- You're a fucking asshole
Randy.

- Ricky.

- What do you want boys?

- Mr. Lahey. Look, I know yo
probably don't like me that much

cause I hang around with these
guys, fuck you around sometimes,

and do things
that you don't like,

but that Rush concert mean
s everything to me.

Can you find it in your hear
t

to sell me one of those
tickets please?

This is all the money
I have in the world,

but I'll give it to you please

- Jim, stop being a prick
and just sell us some tickets.

- I'm sorry Julian.
I am a prick.

Boys, back to work
if you want those tickets.

- You can keep your
fucking tickets, Lahey.

- Do you think
that's a good idea.

- Fucking right
it's a good idea.

- Ricky!

- Ricky! Ricky! That's willful
destruction of garbage. Ricky.

Sorry, Bubbles.
It's the company you keep, boy

- Why didn't you say anythin
g to us man?

We can get into Metro Centre
any time.

- Why were you sorting
garbage, then?

- Cause that's what
you guys were doing.

- Yeah man,
we were just chilling with you

- You guys are fucked, you kno
w that? You're fucking stupid.

- So what's up?

- Well man, we got in
to Aaron Carter

and Backstreet Boys,
all the time through a tunnel.

- The tunnel pops up right
in the back of the stadium

- It's a manhole.
- A sewer? You guys are fucked

I'm not crawling through
a fucking sewer.

- Don't do anything stupid
Ricky.

- Oh yeah, he probably won't d
o anything stupid, Julian.

- Welcome to the Prince Elliott.

s
- I'm Alex's personal guitar tech. I've got to take thi

to his room right away.
Can I have the key please?

Most rock stars are supposed

to be really approachable
and really fun

and easy to talk to, but for
some reason, Alex wasn't.

I need four tickets
to your concert right now.

We can do this the easy wa
y or hard way.

- I'm not a ticket agency. I
can't help you with the tickets.

- You can't get me four tickets?
- I'm sorry.

- He was just one of these guy
s that don't want to talk

to anybody, I'm a big fanc
y rock star and you can't

talk to me, so it pissed me off.
- Hang on a second, man.

Let's go. No fucking around.
You say a word about this,

I'm going to tell everyone
you sexually assaulted me.

- Come on, give me a break

- Take it easy. We're just
gonna go for a little drive.

Hotel security. This man i
s drunk as fuck, he's on drugs

- What's going on here?

- He's a male prostitute, I'
going to escort him out of here.

- That's one Ricky uses a lot.

I've seen him use that
on different people.

The cops come and Ricky's like

"This guy's a drunk
male prostitute

and he's soliciting prostitution

and he's trying to do things
to me,

and he's a drunk
male prostitute".

- I may have called him
a male prostitute,

I don't remember exactly.

Very well, he could be a mal
prostitute, you don't know that.

- But he got pissed off and wa
s saying "oh, you kidnapped me".

It wasn't kidnapping, so if he's
gonna say I kidnapped him,

I'm gonna call him
a male prostitute.

- Fuck!

- Check it out dude.
What's up Jules?

- Hey.

p
- This'll keep you pretty dr y and stuff but it's best to kee

some extra clothes
just in case you fall in.

- Yeah man, I fell in.
It's pretty bad.

- Julian, it's fucked. I don't want to
fall in the sewer with these dickweeds.

- Don't worry Bubbles. We're
not going to wear this shit man.

This is in case we have no other option.
- Where are we?

- The fucking best trailer par k in the God
- Damned world right here.

Good people, good friends and we're
gonna fucking se e a little show.

But the first thing I want to do is make
it clear that this is not kidnapping.

- This is totally kidnapping
. - It's not fucking kidnapping.

- This is fucking
totally kidnapping.

- I'm borrowing you
to play a little concert

back at the trailer park.
- I don't do that kind of stuff.

- You're fucking in a rock band.
You should be used to this

- Can I tell you something
? You're a fucking mental case

- What the fuck are you talking about? Look...
- You are crazy.

- It's not my fault you're
this big fucking

- You could go to jail
for a long time for this.

- I'm not going to jail. This
isn't kidnapping. I'm borrowing you.

- Oh, no big deal at all.

Ricky just went and stole
a human being.

- It's like a little rehearsal
. You play a couple of songs

and then you can go back
to your little dream world

Whatever the fuck it is you do
with yourself all the time

Playing your fucking big guita
r in front of people.

- Yeah dude, where's Rick?

- Shut up and listen
carefully boys.

You guys are going to go in to
the bathroom first, set up

Make sure you put an
"Out of Order" sign on the door.

And here. Just in case. That's
a change of clothes for us

- Hey buddy.

- Julian, I came through buddy
. Where's Bubbles?

- At the vet. Don't tell m
e you've got tickets?

- I've got better than tickets
. Check this out.

- Ricky. Ricky.
This, you're from Rush.

- Yeah, it's Alex Lifeson. Ale
this is J, uh, it's Gord Downey.

This is Alex. Hey, play
"I Like to Rock".

- That's April Wine.

- Well play that
Diane Sawyer song.

Just fucking play something.
That's why you're here.

- Ricky?
What's he doing here?

- I just borrowed him for
a couple of hours from the hotel

I was gonna put on a concert for Bubbles.
- You kidnapped him Ricky.

- It's not kidnapping.
- You don't borrow people.

- It's totally cool man.
We worked it all out.

- You? Alright. Can you stop
playing just for a second.

Alright, he uh. Alright.

I'm gonna untie you, and you'r
e not going to call the police

He's just a big fan, he made a
mistake. This isn't kidnapping.

I'm sorry man.
Like, are we cool or what?

- You untie me. You get me bac
k to my hotel. It's no problem

- What's this one?
- I don't know dude.

- Sorry about all this shit man.
- Okay. It's alright.

- Fuck that.
Don't even worry about it.

Don't shove me.

You got enough money?

Here's another dollar thirty-six
there dicktree.

- Hey man.

- I can't believe
I'm picking this stuff up.

- Just get the fuck out of here,
would you?

- You fucked up big time. Ricky,
don't be giving him the finger

- He fucking stared at me.

- You fucked up big time
this time man.

You wanna go back to jail?
Because it looks like you do

Huh?
- Julian, look.

I fucked up and I'm sorry
alright. You got a better idea

- This is fucked up Julian
- Look boys. I'm sorry, alright.

The security is a little tight
. It will be fun man.

- This is not fucking fun
Julian. This is bullshit.

- You want to see Rush Bubbles
? - Yes, I want to see Rush.

- Get down there.
You want me to go next?

- Please.
What if something gets me?

Ah! Something licked me on
the knee. Something licked me.

We did it Julian.

There's Alex Lifeson.
That's him.

- Shh! Shh!

- Sorry Randy,
I've got this T-shirt

for you to wear tonight on stage
during the guitar changes.

- No thanks Alex,
I don't wear shirts.

- Oh no, you gotta wear a shirt.
Please.

- I never do.

- He doesn't wear shirts Mr.
Lifeson. That's the way it is.

- Mr. Lahey, maybe you can tal
k him in to wearing this shirt

- He doesn't wear shirts.
Not even in the wintertime

How did you idiots get in here
? - Hi Alex.

- Don't worry about it Lahey
. - Hey, I know this guy.

n
- You see this Randy. When somebody like Alex Lifeso

gives you a fucking T-shir
t to put on,

you're putting
the fucking thing on.

I don't care if you don't
wear shirts.

- I don't wear, frig off.
- Randy doesn't wear shirts.

- Put it on Randy.

- Take the garbage downtown,
boys.

- Put it on, Randy.

- I can't fucking believe we
have to go through this again.

- Boys, it wasn't that bad

n
- I don't know what happened. I sat Corey and Trevor dow

for two hours and discusse
d this plan with them.

Take the clothes, bring them
into the Metro Centre,

we'll meet you inside.

- What are you guys wearing?

- Ah shit dude. We got these
from a road case man.

And there's lots more
so you can put it on too.

- Where in the fuck are
our clothes and the stuff?

- Well, it's funny. We wer
e worried about uh, about them

getting lost right so we too
k everything, the weed

and your clothes and we pu
t them in a Rush road case.

- And?!

- And the roadies took them away
when we went to get hot dogs

- Holy fuck!
- What did it say on the case?

- Wardrobe.

- What the fuck are you doin
g wearing my clothes?

- Not this asshole again. What
are you doing with my clothes?

I thought we had a deal here
. No cops.

- Alex, we're on in four
- Oh great.

- I'm fucking telling.
Mr. Lahey!

- Guys please, give me a break
here. I've gotta get on stage,

I've gotta get out of thes
e stupid track pants

and into my clothes right now.

- What the fuck's wrong
with track pants?

- Give me my stuff back.
For Christ's sakes.

- Freeze. What's going on here

Okay boys, throw
these two idiots out.

- We paid money for tickets.
- He's a felon. Get him out.

- This fucking thing shouldn't
be about dope and swearing

and idiots with no fucking
shirts on going camping drunk.

You guys don't even give a fuc
k about Rush. I do.

t
- That's right Bubbles. I don't. But what I do give a fuck abou

is recycling and the fact
that this idiot

deliberately ruined Randy
and my camping trip.

- Shit, I didn't ruin it. Yo
u ruined it. And so did Alex

It wasn't my fault.

- This is so fucked up.
This is my dressing room.

- Sorry Alex. But those tw
o were outside scalping tickets.

He's got about twenty on him
. He wouldn't give me one.

- You scalping tickets Randy
? Contest winner?

Guys, get these two
out of here right now.

- Alex listen please, I'm
really, really sorry about this.

I mean, we weren't doing
anything wrong.

- Fuck off Randy.
- Alex. Alex.

- What do you think of that,
Randy?

- Alright Alex.
No more fucking around.

Where's my dope?
I gotta start selling here

- What this?
I found this in my DR.

- Oh, for fuck's sakes.

Big bag of dope is causing
all the problems again boys.

- Relax, relax Bubbles.
It's okay.

- You fucking smoked
some of this, didn't you.

- Ricky. Alex, listen. Bubbles
, should have won

the guitar tech contest
this afternoon.

Randy cheated
and stole his answer.

- That's right Alex.
I'm a way bigger fan than him.

You're the best guitar playe
r that ever lived.

- I appreciate that.

But I've got to get in to my
stage stuff and get on stage

- I'm not trying to be a dick, but are
you going to pay for the weed you smoked?

- Ricky. Listen Alex, I don' t
mean to be bothering you again man,

but he really got cheated toda
y on that contest.

Is there anyway he can be
your guitar tech?

- I don't know. You can't just
get up there and do it.

It's a tough gig.
- I swear to God I can do it

I know everything about your
stuff man. Everything.

- Alright, alright he can do it.

Under this condition. I don'
t want to see him any more.

- I want to ride in the limo and
I want you to pay for the dope

and then we got a deal.
That's fair.

- Ah, you don't quit.
- Ricky, I'll pay for his dope

- Alright, alright. You go
t the ride in the limo, alright.

Let's get to work.
- Thanks Alex. Have fun Bubbles.

- Holy fuck, do I have it right?
Cables in there, power's on.

She's on. Everything's on.
Here we go.

She's all tuned up, polished
. There's your pick.

- Have a good one.
- Let's do it.

[playing song "Tom Sawyer"

- I think when I saw what Rick
y and Julian did for Bubbles

and the lengths that they went
to to just, uh,

make him happy for
that one little moment.

- Here you go Alex.

- How's it going Bubbles?
You alright?

- I'm doing alright. I'm doing
alright. You're playing a good show

- Perfect. You did a great job
today. Everything sounds good.

Everything's in tune.
- Thanks Alex.

- Awesome.
- Thanks Alex.

- That was a fucking
awesome concert man.

- You're fucking right it wa
s an awesome concert.

- Alex, he still has something to say to you. Rick.
- Yeah Ricky.

- I just want to apologize for some
of the shit that went down earlier.

Even though it totally wasn'
t my fault, but it happened

and I guess I was a bit
of a dick and you were

a bit of a dick and there wa
s a lot of people being dicks.

- Everyone can be a dick sometimes,
but let's not worry about it alright.

- Can you come show me
some fucking guitar chords

- After what we've been
through today, I'd love to

- Alright.
- Alright.

- I tried to do "Closer to the
Heart" but I got it messed up.

I got the pick in hand.

- Yeah. Oh, yeah, this is easy
Just move up one position there.

There you go, try that.

[playing "Closer to the Heart"

- Should one of us sing it
? - Who did you have in mind