All language subtitles for Beverly.Hills.90210.S10E05.The.Loo-Ouch.1080p.CRAV.WEB-DL.DD5.1.H.264-playWEB_track3_[eng]

Yeah? Hello?

This is Radio 109.7,

and if you can tell us
what song we're playing,

you could win $10,000.

This is Special Agent
Kincaid with the FBI.

This call is being traced.

Shh! -Federal agents are
on their way.

We're in trouble.

Hang up.

Oh, man.

You gotta love these
phony phone calls.

Oh, it's the tenth time
this week

those juvenile delinquents
have called.

Ow, ow!

Well, since I'm up...

What, are you gonna work?

Yeah.

I've always liked
writing at night.

Well, since I'm up...

In a few moments
we'll return to our...

Uh, the reason I like writing
at night

is because it's usually quiet.

Gone With the Wind.

It's my favorite.

When I was a little girl
I dressed up like Scarlett

- for Halloween. It was great.
- Mm-hmm.

Well, I tell you what.
Why don't we--

we'll catch the second half
of this down in your room.

What, are you sending me
to my room?

No, it's just I--

you know, I want to write
and it's... late.

Look for the bright red...

We had time for sex.

Well, yeah.

No, it's okay.

Next time you want to pencil
me in, you just let me know.

Hey, you got a second?

Ice machine's down the hall.

I know, I live here.
And I've seen you

coming out of here at all hours.

- Good for you.
- Listen, if you want

a late-night shift, I got a gig.

Lot of girls who work the hotel
dance at my club.

- What?
- Strictly high rollers.

Now, why don't you do a little
tryout for me...? -Why don't you

- take your hand off my arm?
- You are making a big mistake.

Hey, I-I-I don't mean
to step on your dime.

If she's still servicing you,
I can...

Yeah.

- Now apologize to the lady.
- Why? He made me feel

the same way you do.

My parents kicked me
out of the house

when they found out
we were dating.

This is different.

Yeah, it's so much worse.

Mom, Dad.

- You know Steve.
- Hi.

You're pregnant?

Yes, I am.

All right, come on, Michelle.

Please, don't go.

We have an announcement to make.

A, uh, second announcement.

It's one that we hope
you'll be happy about.

Because we are.

We're getting married.

No problem.
I'll bring it to your table.

Well, this is all so unexpected.

Janet, you're too young
to marry.

You haven't dated enough...

Men who are Japanese?

There are so many things
you wanted to do.

Like marry the man I love.

Which is exactly what I'm gonna
do, whether you like it or not.

You're disgracing our family.

Come on, Michelle.

♪ I know that there's no time
at all ♪

♪ But I know something
you don't know ♪

♪ Yeah, I've been waiting here

♪ Far too long to fight it

♪ You'll never go it alone

♪ I won't let you

♪ You'll never go it
alone again ♪

♪ Oh, you can't deny

♪ It's true

♪ You know I don't mean
to be hard on you... ♪

My point is there is...

there's the guy you hear
on the radio, right?

There's him and then
there's me. -Mm-hmm.

Oh, the guy that I kissed.

- Exactly.
- Which is funny,

because, you know, you sound
exactly like the guy that

reviewed that kiss to thousands
of listeners. -Wait, yeah,

but that was the other guy.

Oh,
I keep forgetting.

- You're Mr. Average.
- Average?

- Mmm.
- Ow. You know, I-I--

things were going so good,

I was kinda hoping
I'd rate a notch higher,

- but I guess...
- You do. You do.

- Look, I know you hate my show.
- It's...

Okay?

Sometimes I hate my show.

Here's my suggestion to you.

All right? Listen to me.

The next time you hear
that guy...

- The jerk?
- The jerk.

Uh-huh.

Just... turn it off.

Just reach out
and turn the radio off.

- I can do that.
- Okay.

The question is,
can you do that?

Absolutely.

What?

You didn't buy it? Absolutely.

That one sound better?

Hey, look who's here!

A rep from KVIB dropped off

a box of these.

"If you're gonna play,
you might as well score."

Wait, R-- that's the other guy.
All right? That's the jerk.

It's not me.

You know, I wish
I believed that.

So, wait a minute.

When her parents found out
she was pregnant,

- they didn't even sit down?
- Mm-mmm.

We're expecting a baby
in three months,

and we're trying
to plan a wedding

that includes both
our families. -Mmm.

And you got lunch
with your old man today.

Oh, yeah, the fun never ends,
does it?

How's Janet holding up?

She dragged me out to the
hardware store last night,

just to find
some color swatches...

then stays up all night

obsessing over what color
to paint the nursery.

Did you guys, uh, find a place?

Add that to the never-ending
list of things to do.

What about here?

Well, it'd be great,
but it's not big enough.

With the nursery,
we're one bedroom short.

Not if one of us moved out.

I couldn't ask you to do that.

Steve, you got enough
to deal with

without worrying about
where you're gonna live.

You'd do that?

Well, not for you,
but for Janet and the kid?

- Yeah, we'd do that.
- Hmm.

Oh, that is a huge relief!

Oh! Thanks, guys.

Seriously.

- Mm-hmm.
- All right.

Hey, don't worry about it.

Have a great day.

Yeah.

Okay.

I don't know about you,

but "no problem"
isn't exactly accurate.

No, it's not even close, man.

I'm broke.

This is bound to bring up the
whole living-together issue.

Not for me.

Donna doesn't want to,
and you know what?

I am standing alone
on this one, buddy.

- Hello.
- Hey.

Mmm.

Is this for a new display?

Uh, no. These are decorations

for Steve and Janet's
engagement party.

Hmm, well, I think you can
scratch Janet's parents

off the guest list.

She was so freaked out
after seeing them,

she stayed up all night picking
out colors for the nursery.

Nursery? What nursery?

Um... the one going
in Noah's room.

Or mine.

Somebody's moving out?

Maybe me.

I don't know.

But it raises some issues.

Or, you know, opportunities.

For us.

Excuse me.

- Do you have any handbags?
- Oh.

Yeah, right over there.

Oh, there.

Well, you get back to work,

and we can talk about this
later, okay?

- Okay.
- All right.

Did I hear Matt's voice?

Yeah.

We were just talking about
moving in together, I think.

- What?
- Well,

apparently, Steve and Janet

are gonna be staying
in the Walsh house.

What about Matt and Noah?

Somebody's gotta go.

Noah didn't mention it to you?

No.

Well, I'm sure he will.

Where's Dylan?

I don't know.

Look, I've got this month's rent
check for him.

Fine, I'll take it.

No, no, no, no, no.

I want to give it to him myself.

I want to explain why it's
a little short this month.

Oh, you didn't sell
enough Jell-O shots?

That's the lease agreement.

I do all the work, he reaps
all the benefits, you know.

Well, of course he does.

If it makes you feel any better,

that's his approach
to romance, too.

That guy gives me an idea.

What if I told you...

that we could double your money,

and you wouldn't have to share
a penny with Dylan?

- We?
- Yeah, me and you.

That's already a bad idea.

All right, well, whatever.
I was just thinking,

you know, a little side venture.

I'd plan it, you'd run it.

Just a little after-hours
business.

But it's cool.

After hours, huh?

Mm-hmm.

Strippers, lap dancing.

Rich guys plus sleazy girls
equals...

money.

Yeah, and trouble.

Yeah.

Tell me your decision
to get married

has nothing to do
with the pregnancy.

Nothing.

Shotgun weddings
don't work, son.

Dad, no one's forcing
this marriage.

Have some sparkling water
and chopsticks, please?

They love it
when you use chopsticks.

Dad, I could use your support.

You got it, son.

Married or not, you got that.

Look, why don't you order
for us, huh?

Uh, maybe a nice, uh,

spicy meat dish or something.

They always keep the
best dishes a secret

for the, uh...
Chinese, not-not your people.

I know.

He needs therapy.

Sir, I'm not sure
what you'd like,

because I'm both Vietnamese
and a vegetarian.

So, I haven't tried
the meat dishes.

Could you give us
a minute, please?

Okay, here's what I think.

You have the child first.

And then you see
how it goes between you.

See how it goes?

So you're saying
don't get married?

Just so you know,

Janet and I love each other
very much.

We're not gonna
take your advice.

Let's go.

- Whoa.
- Oh, great.

You smell good.

Uh, don't, Dylan.

I just came to pick up my bag,
and here's your key.

I was gonna order some dinner.
Why don't you stay?

- I'm off the clock.
- Oh.

Gina, the living situation--

it has nothing to do
with how I feel about you.

No, Dylan, don't even tell...
You know what?

- You make me feel like a whore.
- You know I want...

- Do you know that?
- I want to be with you.

- I don't want to live with you.
- Oh. I don't even want

to hear it.
It's always about you, isn't it?

Mr. McKay, I'm Maria Alvarez.

I'm a housekeeper here
at the hotel.

Yeah.

And my sons have something
they'd like to say to you.

Uh, sorry

- about the phony phone calls.
- Me, too.

It's my fault. Ever since

the community center stopped
their programs,

I've had to bring them
to work with me.

I take it Hector caught you.

Yeah.

Yeah, Hector used
to bust me, too, all the time.

May I have a word
with the boys?

Okay.

All right, you two knuckleheads,
listen to me.

You see this joker over here,
room 701?

This guy needs a wakeup call
every, uh...

every 15 minutes
starting at 6:00 in the morning.

You guys think
you can handle it?

No problem.

Remember,

I owe you one,

and I am the best,
so when you least expect it,

expect it.

All right?

Get out of here.

Get a haircut.

Why hasn't Noah told me
he might be moving out?

Noah's moving out?

I don't know.
He hasn't mentioned it.

That's weird, right?

I'm sure there's an explanation.

Okay, um, let's get back
to party planning.

We'll just forget about Noah.

Let's forget about Janet's
parents' hostility, too, okay?

Let's forget about Steve's
father's insensitivity.

I think it's about
the hostility, don't you?

A hula skirt, anyone? Anyone?

Well, at-at least
your mom's happy about the news.

You know what? Thank God
she's out of town filming

in Toronto.
You know why?

See, she's a Caucasian,
and she's a lesbian,

which means she's a double
threat to your parents.

Have the baby,
see how it goes?

Did your father say,
"Date other women,"

or was that just the subtext?

Oh, please, Janet!

Well, we could call the florist
about the leis.

- Hey...
- Surprise!

Hi, Karen.

Hey, congratulations.

Oh.

Oh, gosh, your mom told
me about the party,

and though she couldn't make it,

I was in San Diego on business,
and she insisted I come.

- Oh, good.
- Oh, you must be Janet.

Yes, uh, Donna, Janet...

- Hi.
- ...this is Karen Lewis,

my mom's girlfriend.
Uh, partner?

Y-You're here
for the engagement party?

I'm here to represent
the healthy, loving side

of Steve's family in
your gorgeous mother's absence.

I can't wait
to meet your parents.

Huh.

Janet?

Hey, are you all right?
Is it the baby?

Something's wrong.

Call Dr. Long.

Tell her to meet us
at the hospital.

Oh, my God.

All right, so after

- the club closes...
- We open for an after party.

Right. 20 bucks a head.

No. You know what?

We can get 30. Trust me.

Really?

- Yes.
- Okay, but all

the girls negotiate
their own deals and pocket

their own money,

and they can negotiate
whatever else they want.

Okay, how do we fill the seats?

Compliments
of Kelly's publicist.

You know, it's so weird, because

she lost her contact list
of power players,

and suddenly, it ended up
in my purse.

- Finders keepers.
- Losers weepers.

That's right.

So what's up with your sudden
change of heart, anyway?

First and last month's rent.

You moving out
of the Walsh house?

Maybe, and you know,

apartments are a lot more
expensive than I remember.

What about moving in with Donna?

She wouldn't want to,
and even if she did,

I'm not gonna freeload off her.

Yeah, well, considering
how bad it feels

for me to freeload off of Dylan,

I guess you're probably making
the right decision.

Then why are you staying here,
living off his money?

Because I'm broke,
just like you.

All right,
now, I'm just curious here.

I mean, what happened to all the
money Donna's mom forked over?

My mother spent it all.

Doesn't matter.

I'm gonna make it all back...
and then some.

I can't remember the last time

anybody asked
to use our projector.

Mm, yeah, well, video and DVD--
it's not quite the same thing.

Oh, hold on a second.

Sientense aquí, por favor.

And finish your homework.

And don't move.

Do you hear me?

Oh, yeah,
when you least expect it,

expect it.

- You're good.
- Very good.

Mm.

Homework.

Now!

I'm happy to say,
the ultrasound

images were normal,

the baby's heart rate
was normal,

and your blood work was normal.

- So she's okay?
- As far as we can tell,

mother and baby
are absolutely fine.

Thank God.

Then why did it feel like

my heart was beating
a million miles a minute?

Have you been under a lot

of stress lately?

Some.

From what you describe,

you might have had
a panic attack.

A panic attack?

We were just
sitting around talking.

I've never had one before.

Good.

Let's avoid another.

I'm reluctant

to prescribe any medication
this late in your pregnancy,

so my advice is, light exercise,

plenty of rest,

and most of all,

avoid stressful situations.

Janet.

Mom, what are you doing here?

I called her.

Are you all right?

I'm okay.

Oh, thank God.

I was so terrified.

That makes two of us.
I completely panicked.

Oh, being pregnant
can be scary.

I know. I was with you.

There have been so many times
I've wanted to call you.

Well, your health,

this child--

that's the most important thing
now.

Remember, no stress.

I'm Michelle Sosna,
Janet's mother.

I know Donna, but, uh...

Uh, Mrs. Sosna,
this is Karen.

-Hi.
- My adopted sister.

Come on, sis.

Let's get some coffee.

I'll explain.
I'll explain.

Grand Central Market
was amazing.

Yes.

And Angels Flight--
oh, that was so cool.

Shortest railway in the world.

Thank you for taking me.

Thank you for giving me
another chance.

What did I tell you, huh?

Me and the guy on the air
don't have to mix, right?

You know, I would love
to invite you in right now,

but I would feel really weird
about it.

So don't.

You don't have to.

But then you won't call.

I mean, it's your choice.
I'm just saying...

- I'll call you tomorrow.
- Come on, David.

I listen to your show.
This was our third date.

Either you're in or you're out.

We sleep together tonight,

or I'm history, right?
Isn't that your rule?

Want to hang out tomorrow night?

If you're offering me
an extension

on that deadline,
I think I'm gonna pass.

My friends Steve and Janet are
throwing an engagement party.

It's a luau.

Ah... sounds irresistible,
doesn't it?

I really want you
to meet my friends.

I'll think about it.

You do that.

Good night.

Thanks.

I saw this, uh, townhouse today,
driving back from work.

And it had two bedrooms,
an office, upper and lower deck.

Mm. Sounds big.

Well, not for two people.

Come on, let's give it a shot.

I think it'd be fun.

It-It would be fun someday.

I like living with Donna, I like

walking around with a mud mask,

knowing there are nights
when I don't have to look cute.

Oh, mud masks are cute.

I like things the way they are.

Things are good, right?

Just thought they could be
better, that's all.

I'm not saying they wouldn't be.

No. You're just talking
about living with Donna

and beauty treatments

and pretty much
everything but us, right?

I have to tell you something.

Okay, I'm listening.

I can't make the luau.

Oh.

Okay. Is that it?

I got so much
work at the club.

Restock the shelves,
do the books,

and we are way over budget.

Anything else?

I'm crazy about you.

Come on, Noah.

I know
that you might be moving out.

Matt told Kelly, and...

- And Kelly told you?
- Yeah.

Look, it's my problem.

I'll deal with it.

It's not our problem?

I'm getting my own place.

It's no big deal.

Mm-hmm.

What? Are you kidding me?

This club is gonna make
every other club

in Los Angeles look like
a church picnic.

Yes.

Of course I'm gonna be there.

Yeah. No, just bring
whoever you want.

Okay. Yeah, hold...

Yeah? Come in!

Hey, I'll see you there.

Okay, bye.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait, wait. Excuse me.

Uh, that's... This...
You have the wrong room.

This-This is... This isn't...

That is... What...
What are you doing?

- What?
- Well, here you go.

That's for your enjoyment.

Now, take a ticket.
Take-Take two.

- What?
- So I can be your date.

Thank you very much.

Now give me that back.

Enjoy the show, miss.

Quickly, gentlemen.

We have a beautiful young woman
to impress.

Uh, it was Gone With the Wind,
was it not?

Gone With the Wind.

Oh, yeah.

And it is show time. Yeow!

You're insane.

All right, let's just... Ow.

- What are you...?
- What is that?

- Oh, wait. I'll...
- Is that your date book?

- Here, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Get that out of here.

Okay.

Yeah.

Mmm.

I hope Kelly and Donna
never come home.

Mm-hmm.

- How's that feel? Good?
- Good.

How about some
of that ice cream? -Okay.

You'll get it!

Mr. and Mrs. Sosna!

Come in, please.

- Hi.
- Hi.

We've come because now we have
an announcement to make.

I told him about your scare.

Some events can be
a blessing in disguise.

I shouldn't have
pushed you away.

You're right,
you shouldn't have.

She's your daughter,
and she needs you.

I couldn't agree
with you more.

Which is why we want you
to move back in with us.

Is that your announcement?

We want to help:
with the child,

with expenses,
with everything.

Well, thanks, but we're fine.

And I'm gonna keep working.

What about school?

You'd always talked about

a graduate program
in French literature.

But that was two years ago, Dad,

and you said that was a waste
of money.

We'll take care of it.

And the baby.

And you can have freedom,
and be a mother.

Excuse me,

but where do I fit

into this happy, well-funded
picture you're painting?

You're the child's father.

You can come visit.

Visit?

Remember how scared
you were in the emergency room?

Well, you won't be with us.

I'm fine here.

But I do need you.

Steve and I both do.

Please, Janet,

think of what's best
for the child:

raising your baby with us,
or alone with him.

She said no.

Think about it.

Hey, you two!

Thought I told you to place
those calls to room 701.

We did.

You didn't get one, did you?

Oh, did I get one? No.

I got eight.

You know what this means.

War.

Yeah.

Get your stuff.

We're leaving.

Hey, what's going on?

I got fired!

Fired? Hector, wh-why?

Because Mrs. Haverhill found
two large crabs

in her bathtub this morning.

We're just trying
to keep 'em alive.

Yeah, listen, Hector,
I put these guys up to it, okay?

I will take responsibility,

and I will take care
of old Mrs. Haverhill.

I'll send her up some schnapps.

Dylan, this is a hotel,

not a daycare center.

I know, but listen,
as a favor to me,

I'm asking you,

please don't do this.

I'm sorry,
but I have no choice.

Oh, come... Hector!

Noah said the cases
are waiting inside.

Wait! We'll help you.

Figure out what else we need
for the party.

Do roommate things. Whatever.

Roommate things?

Pedicures, collagen
treatments, mud masks.

I told him that I didn't want
to move in with him.

Well, at least
your boyfriend asked.

Noah just told me

he's gonna get his own place.
End of story.

What? Noah was the one
pushing to move in, before...

Before I went
temporarily insane.

Yeah, I know.

Well, is that what he said?

Because if it isn't,
don't assume.

Uh, it's...

Getting over this hurdle
is like our first test

since we've been back together.
We're failing miserably.

We can't commit,

but the ultimate adolescent
Steve Sanders is going

to be a father and a husband.

And we're throwing his
engagement party on the beach

in less than two hours.

We're really behind.

My point exactly.

Whoo-hoo!

That's it! Last remnants
of the beach party!

Look, I explained.

The "adopted sister" thing
just kinda popped out, okay?

Can you please just run
with it for the party?

I didn't realize you were
so ashamed of us.

I am proud of my family,

but Janet's parents are
completely uptight.

They're coming here tonight
to try and get her

to change her mind and move back
in with them, all right?

So for this evening,
can we just take a deep breath

and rise above, please?!

By lying.

Exactly!

Dad.

- Hey, son.
- I'm so glad you could make it.

Come on in.

Dad, look, this is
very important, okay?

I need you to focus.

- All right.
- See the woman

over my shoulder?

I sure do.

Is she single?

Dad, that's Karen, Mom's lover.

But for tonight,
she's my adopted sister, okay?

See, Janet's parents don't know

that Mom...

Your mother... my ex-wife...

has a lover named Karen?

Yeah, Dad, she's gay.

I thought you knew.

We could talk
all about that later,

but for now,

she's my adopted sister,
your daughter, okay?

Please, I'm begging you.
Please, please, please?

Fine, son.

It's your night.

Thanks, Dad.

But no wife of mine was
ever gay!

No, listen, you know what?

I don't want you to worry
about that woman getting fired

'cause her kids,
they're total nightmares.

Come on.

They were just having
a good time.

Yeah, in a juvenile delinquent
sort of way.

Dylan, Noah really wanted
to be here tonight.

Yeah? So why isn't he?

'Cause he's running your club.

Uh, you know, I'd like
a really strong dri...

Oh, do you have any
of those little umbrella...?

Do you think you could relieve
him for once?

Yeah, Donna,
I'll think about it.

Um, actually,

I'll just have some wine.

Tonight, please?

Could you fill it

all the way up, because
I'm really thirsty, please?

I'll tell you what.
I'll see what I can do.

Just a little more. Oh!

Oh, my God,

I'm so sorry!

Uh, do you want me to help you?

Spare me.

Sorry!

Don't let her guilt-trip you.

Yeah, I'm just not in much of a
luau kind of mood, anyway.

Oh, me neither.

These people give me a headache.

How did your mother
ever marry that man?

- Hey.
- Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Sosna, hello.

Hello, everybody.

And how's my baby girl
tonight?

Oh, you must be the Sosnas.

I'm Rush Sanders,

Steve's dad.

How do you do?

My wife Michelle.

Michelle. This is Karen,
my daughter.

Uh, is Steve's mother here?

Pumpkin,

where's Mommy?

She's on location.

She's a wonderful actress.

She can fake anything.

Sis, Dad, look, poi!

I'll get it!

Hi. Can I help you?

I'm a special guest.

Is Rush Sanders here?

Trish!

- Rush, hi.
- You're here, huh?

Dad, who's your friend?

The entertainment.

What?

I thought it was
a bachelor party.

Thanks so much for coming,

but we're not gonna need
your services.

That's David Silver!

- Oh, uh...
- Hi.

I'm sorry. You are?

- This is, uh...
- Trish.

Our prospective nanny.

Promise me you'll keep looking.

David Silver, I recognize you!

Could you take this to Robyn?

I listen to your show,

and-and I've seen your face
around town.

- Yeah?
- Um, can I have your autograph?

- Yeah, yeah, sure.
- Great.

- So, how'd that third date go?
- You know,

I'm gonna need
a napkin or something.

No, no, no, sign here.

More poi, anyone?

You're not serious.

David, come on. Live a little.

So, the third date,
did you sleep with her?

Did you get some?

Come on!

Yeah, yeah, tons, all right?

Thanks.

Thanks a lot.

You could try to explain,
but what could you possibly say?

It's all just a phase.

Samantha's always trying
new things.

I can understand
your feeling of emasculation.

Mm-hmm, I bet you can.

Can you tell when
a woman fakes an orgasm?

Yes, absolutely.

That's not what Mom says.

I got something

you don't have.

Penis envy?

All right, that does it!
Come on!

You and me in bed right now!

Your father and your sister?!

Come on, Michelle.

Great.

Where's your coat?

Hold on a second.

I have a confession
to make. That woman?

She's not my sister.

It doesn't matter.
I've seen enough!

My mom's gay.

Karen is her lover.

Well, that changes everything.

We don't care
who your family is.

That is so not true.

You don't even know me,
and you judge me.

We know you run a gossip sheet.

It's garbage!

I work there, too, Dad.

You said it was temporary,
a lark.

Until you met him.

We only came here
to get you to move home.

You're wasting your time.

You're wasting our
daughter's potential.

Janet,

you're a smart girl.

You wanted grad school!

Have you noticed
that my life's gone

in a different direction, Daddy?

That I'm happy?

Do you even care?

Of course we do...

but you're throwing
your life away.

That's right, Dad,
it's my life and my choices.

Admit it,
you're not disappointed

in the man I've chosen,
you're disappointed in me.

You're right, we are.

Okay. I gotta get
to the club. Man!

Oh, um, well, don't go yet.

Wait just one second.

Now, we want stripping,
lap dancing;

anything the customer wants.

Hello.

Noah, listen, you better be done
with auditions.

Look, I need
another hour at least.

No, no, just listen to me.
Donna is guilt-tripping Dylan

about all the hours
you're putting in,

and he's on his way
down there right now.

I need another half an hour.

He's coming right now!

Well, stop him.

How?

I don't know. Use your head.

Improvise. Do something.

No, Noah, I... Hello?

Noah?

Um, my headache seems
to have disappeared.

Yeah, so did your clothes.

Oh... yeah.

Are you sure you have
to go to work?

Yeah.

Um, this looks
like a job for me.

Your parents want to send you
to grad school,

and I've got you digging
through celebrity trash.

Well, maybe I will get
my master's.

Are you afraid
that I won't be able

to take care of you
and the baby?

No, I'm not.

Well, I'm kinda scared

that if you choose me
over your family,

that you're gonna resent me.

My family's
no consolation prize.

It's my father that's making me
choose, okay?

Not you.

And then there's this culture
that I know nothing about.

You never speak Japanese.

I hardly know any.

Neither will your kid.

The worst part
about your family...

they have a point.

Well, thanks to an
anonymous donation,

we've reopened
our after-school program.

- Go on, go.
- Go!

Dylan, I got your message.

You said it was important.

Yes, it is important, Hector.

It's important for you to know

that the hotel will no longer be
functioning as a daycare center,

seeing as how this place
is open for business.

Does that mean
I could have my job back?

You know, I spoke with

old Mrs. Haverhill,

and she's, uh,
she's feeling no pain.

Please, Hector?

I suppose.

Thank you!

But I'm expecting some schnapps.

Oh, and some schnapps
you shall get.

You know, we could use
a guy like you around here.

No, I don't think so.

I'm not really very good
with kids.

Mmm, I don't know about that.

Trust me, I've been running
this place for two years now.

Kids only mess with the grownups
they like.

Well, if you'll excuse me.

Okay.

Thank you.

I won't disappoint you.

Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!

Boy, are you gonna get it.

Here we go.

Okay, we got
the answer to our problems.

Tails, I move out...

Heads, I do.

We need to talk.

Hey...

It just kills me that we're
gonna let a coin decide

what we're gonna do.

You mean what I'm gonna do.

Are we gonna talk about this?

'Cause I really want to.

Okay, what do you want
to talk about?

Us moving in together?

Maybe.

I mean...

we've already been down
that road before.

You said no.

I know.

I just... I freaked out when we
were looking for places.

It's a big decision.

Yeah, it is.

You know all that stuff
I said about liking

how and where I live?

Yeah, there was something
about mud masks, if I recall.

Part of me wants
to live with you so bad.

But?

I'm confused.

Steve and Janet are
getting married,

they're having a baby...

And how does that affect us?

I feel left behind.

And I don't want to commit
to living with you

just because I feel like my life
is passing me by.

Does that make any sense?

Well, you're 25 years old.

I feel a lot older than 25.

Well, I understand.

I know you do.

That's why I love you.

And I love you, too.

Now root for me,
because I hate packing.

Come on.

You ready?

Here we go.

Let's do it.

Noah and I are
moving in together.

Huh!

See...

heads, tails...

...we win.

I want us to live together.

Are you sure?

Absolutely.

Congratulations.

Yeah, let's, uh,
let's go out and celebrate.

I have to go to work right now,

but we are gonna celebrate
when I get back.

You bet we are.

- See ya.
- All right.

Really, man?

Yeah, well...

Thank you all for coming.

Let's try this
one more time here.

We wanted to apologize

for all the mistakes we've made.

We're not proud

of the way we behaved
at the luau.

And we want you to know

we've considered your advice.

I know you think
this is a shotgun wedding.

I'm not holding a gun!

We've begged Janet
not to marry your son!

That's because you don't think
he's good enough for me, Dad.

Wait. Wait a minute.

Who are you,
the Emperor of Siam?

That's Thailand,
by the way, not Japan.

Well, you're in America
now, buddy.

Where we've lived and done
business for 43 years.

All right, stop this,
all right?!

Look, it's not
about race or class

or stupid things
that we've said and done.

It's about the fact that Steve
and I love each other

and we're getting married.

I would have proposed,
eventually.

Just so you know.

This baby... this baby's
just an added bonus.

So you can be happy for us

and be a part of
this child's life,

and you can share
all the things

that you have to offer.

Or you could sit back
and wait and see if we fail.

It's your choice.

'Cause right now,

we have our own
family to think about.

Um...

You weren't gonna tell me,
were you?

About what?

About your anonymous
contribution

to the community center.

Oh, Hector, he ratted me out.

Hector's a rat.

He's proud, though.

Kiss me.

Lift your head.

Oh! Ooh!

Mmm.

You know, you don't,
you don't have to go.

That's a switch.

I'm a little slow on the uptake,
but I learn.

You know...

despite how hard you try
to hide it,

you can be a pretty great guy.

You know that?

Some of the time.

So, stay with me.

I can't.

Hey, what's up?

I feel like a pimp.

You look like a pimp.
Give me numbers.

Three grand and change.

Your half.

Whoa. My ha... my half?

Yeah, I'm doing this
for Donna, okay?

I know. That's so romantic.

I'm doing this for me. Me.

You didn't pick up the phone,
so...

No, I'm picking up...

selectively.

You know,

I'm just talking to you right
now because I'm curious.

Did we sleep together
again tonight?

Was it good for me, David,

hmm?

Yeah, we did.

And I was great.

Yeah.

Robyn,

I don't know why I lied
about that.

Because you're David Silver.

You shoot, you score, right?

Something like that.

You know, when I was
in high school,

I wasn't like I am now.

I never would have had

a radio guy
with a three-date rule.

I fell in love

with this girl,
and I actually waited years

before I slept with her.

David,

it's been a really long time
since I found somebody

that I could trust.

I gotta be honest
with you. You scare me.

Because when I see you
standing at my door,

I don't know which guy you are
standing there.

It's me.

Robyn, it's just me.

Whoever that is.

But you know,
I gotta tell you,

that guy that you talk about
from high school...

Yeah.

That's the guy that I would have
liked to have met.