Original subtitles

I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY DON'T HAVE ONE GOOD ROCK STATION.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME, BOY? THAT'S STOMPIN' MUSIC.

THIS WILL BE OUR LAST POST. SO LET'S TOUGH IT OUT.

MORNING. SERGEANT MAJOR ZACK CAREY.

MORNING, SERGEANT MAJOR. WELCOME TO FORT CLEMMONS.

IS THIS ALL YOURS? PERSONAL BELONGINGS.

NEVER SAID I TRAVEL LIGHT.

[ MEN EXCLAIM, WHISTLE ]

PUT IT ON THAT SIDE.

SERGEANT MAJOR CAREY!

SERGEANT MAJOR CAREY! YOU CALLING ME?

SERGEANT MAJOR CAREY? YEAH.

I'M JERRY ELLIOTT FROM SOLDIER MAGAZINE.

WE'D LIKE TO INTERVIEW YOU AND TAKE PICTURES.

I JUST GOT HERE.

HOW DID YOU FIND ME SO QUICK?

YOU AREN'T EXACTLY THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER.

WHAT'S A SOLDIER'S MAGAZINE'S INTEREST IN INTERVIEWING ME?

YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE IN THE U.S. ARMY

WHO OWNS A FULLY OPERATIONAL SHERMAN TANK.

I THOUGHT EVERYBODY HAD ONE.

I KNEW A SERGEANT WHO MADE A LAMP OUT OF ONE.

HOW LONG DID IT TAKE YOU TO RESTORE IT?

CLOSE TO 15 YEARS.

SPARE PART HERE, SPARE PART THERE.

DID IT MOSTLY WITH MY SONS. HOW OLD ARE THEY?

WELL, BILLY, HE'S 16,

AND JONATHAN... WOULD BE 22.

HE'S DEAD.

I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT.

IS THIS TANK ALL ORIGINAL?

EVERYTHING EXCEPT THE LOUDSPEAKER AND TAPE DECK FOR PARADES.

THAT WAY, IT COULD BE DECLARED A PUBLIC RELATIONS ASSET.

WHY WOULD ANYBODY WANT A SHERMAN TANK?

IT'S HARD TO SHOOT YOURSELF WHILE CLEANING IT.

ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, HEY!

ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, HEY!

THIS IS THE WAY WE START OUR DAY!

THIS IS THE WAY WE START OUR DAY!

KNOCKIN' DOWN DOORS AND KICKIN' DOWN WALLS!

KNOCKIN' DOWN DOORS AND KICKIN' DOWN WALLS!

[ INTERCOM BUZZES ]

YES. GENERAL HUBIK,

SERGEANT MAJOR CAREY TO SEE YOU.

GREAT. SEND HIM IN.

REPORTING FOR DUTY, SIR.

GOOD TO SEE YOU, GENERAL.

WELL, WELL, FOR AN OLD FART, YOU LOOK GREAT.

WITH YOUR PERMISSION, I'D SAY THE SAME ABOUT YOU.

HOW'S LaDONNA?

FINE, SIR. AND YOUR WIFE?

SHE HAS HER MOMENTS. ALL SQUARED AWAY?

JUST ABOUT.

THERE'S A SERGEANT ELLIOTT LOOKING FOR YOU.

ALREADY FOUND ME, SIR.

HE GOT ME BEFORE I HAD A CHANCE TO TEST THE LATRINES.

WE'RE GOING FOR A DRIVE.

YOU'RE CREATING QUITE A STIR WITH THAT TANK OF YOURS.

I PULLED A FEW STRINGS TO LET YOU KEEP YOUR TANK HERE.

I APPRECIATE THAT, SIR. IF I MAY SAY SO,

I'M GLAD MY LAST ASSIGNMENT IS GOING TO BE UNDER YOU, SIR.

WE'RE TOO YOUNG FOR LAST ASSIGNMENTS.

YES, SIR, BUT I HAVE MADE AN OFFER ON A FISHING BOAT.

IF THEY ACCEPT IT, I'LL PUT IN MY PAPERS.

GIVE ME TWO YEARS,

AND YOU MAY BE THE NEXT SERGEANT MAJOR OF THE ARMY.

[ MAN SHOUTING COMMANDS ]

I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW MUCH I APPRECIATE THAT COMING FROM YOU,

BUT IT GETS COMPLICATED.

I ONLY HAVE ONE SON LEFT.

HE'S ONLY GOT A FEW MORE YEARS AT HOME.

THAT TIME WON'T EVER COME AGAIN. I'VE LEARNED THAT, SIR.

THERE'LL BE TIME TO TALK ABOUT THAT LATER.

PENTAGON DUTY ISN'T HALF BAD FOR A FAMILY.

NEITHER IS FISHING, SIR.

IN YOUR HAT, SERGEANT MAJOR.

YES, SIR, THREE BAGS FULL.

REAR GUARD, RECOVER!

NEXT?

KITCHEN.

I'VE TALKED WITH YOUR MOM AND DAD.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

WHAT'S IT LIKE

HAVING A COMMAND SERGEANT MAJOR FOR A FATHER?

MADE ME MORE RELIGIOUS.

REALLY? HOW'S THAT?

I'VE REALIZED THE PROBLEMS JESUS MUST HAVE HAD,

BEING THE SON OF GOD.

WHAT SORT OF FATHER IS YOUR DAD?

A CROSS BETWEEN GEORGE PATTON AND DANNY THOMAS.

LIKE HE SAYS, "SHIT ROLLS DOWNHILL.

"IF IT'S A BAD DAY AT THE POST,

IT'S THE WRONG DAY TO LOOK LIKE A RAGBAG AT HOME."

YOU CALL ABOUT THE BOAT?

YEAH.

YOU DIDN'T TELL ME. YOU DIDN'T ASK ME.

IT'S LIKE PULLING TEETH TO GET INFORMATION OUT OF YOU.

WHAT DID HE SAY? HE'LL CALL IN A COUPLE OF WEEKS.

PROBABLY WAITING TO SEE IF THEY CAN GET MORE.

I HOPE INTEREST RATES DON'T GO UP. WHAT IF THEY DO?

THEY WON'T. WHAT IF THEY DO?

DO I TELL THEM THEY CAN'T DO THAT

'CAUSE LaDONNA CAREY SAID SO?

YOU'RE AS NERVOUS ABOUT THAT BOAT AS ABOUT THAT TANK.

GO TO THE N.C.O. CLUB. SEE IF WE KNOW ANYBODY ON THIS POST.

YOU'RE A PRETTY GOOD OLD BROAD.

JUST WATCH WHO YOU'RE CALLING OLD.

JESUS, YOU'RE A NERVOUS OLD WOMAN. [ Laughs ]

* AND NOW THE LADY TAKES YOU THERE *

* AND YOU SEE SHE LETS YOU *

* FIND HER

* YOU TOUCH HER

* SHE CAN'T WALK AWAY

* SHE WANTS YOU

* YOU KNOW THE WAY

* YOU SHOW HER THE WAY *

* THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY *

* SHE PLAYS OUT HER PART *

* SHE KNOWS FROM THE START *

* THE BOY'S GOT A HOLD ON HER HEART... *

GIVE ME A BUD.

WHAT?

GIVE ME A BEER!

* BUT IF SHE GOES SOMEWHERE *

* YOU CAN'T BE FAR APART *

* THE GIRL'S GOT A HOLD ON YOUR *

* HEART...

HEY, CAREY!

CAREY!

HI, TIPPET. HOW YOU BEEN?

WHAT THEY GOT YOU DOING HERE?

I'M OPERATIONS N.C.O. WITH THE PROVOST MARSHAL.

HOW'S YOURSELF? I'M GOOD. YOU LOOK GOOD.

LOOK, I WANT YOU TO MEET MY WIFE. CHRIST, I KNOW LINDA.

UH...NO, NO. BIG MISTAKE.

LINDA IS THE OLD WIFE. NEW WIFE IS GWEN.

MUST NOT CALL HER OLD WIFE'S NAME.

SHE'LL BE UPSIDE YOUR HEAD WITH A POOL CUE.

HI. SEE ANYBODY WE KNOW?

ED TIPPET.

WAS LINDA THERE TOO?

NO. GWEN WAS. WHO'S GWEN?

NEW WIFE. LINDA IS OLD WIFE.

THEY GOT DIVORCED?

I GUESS SO.

I USED TO LOVE TO GO TO THE N.C.O. CLUB.

NOT ANYMORE.

NOT UNLESS YOU LIKE TO PLAY BINGO

OR GO TO THE DISCO AND DANCE THE FUNKY MONKEY,

WHATEVER'S BLARING IN THERE.

THEY DON'T EVEN CALL THEM BARS ANYMORE.

I DON'T WANT TO GO TO A DISCO.

I WANT TO GO TO A BAR.

YOU'RE ACTING LIKE THE MOST CROTCHETY OLD BUGGER I'VE EVER SEEN.

I'LL SHOW YOU HOW YOUNG YOU REALLY ARE.

WHY, MISS SCARLETT, HOW YOU DO TALK.

I WANT TO GET THAT BOAT. I WANT TO FINISH THINGS UP

AND GET ON THAT BOAT, THAT'S ALL.

HEY. HEY, WHAT?

G.I. WANT A GOOD PIECE OF ASS?

I LOVE YOU.

YOU BETTER.

GENTLEMEN, THE DIVISION SERGEANT MAJOR.

AT EASE.

IS THIS SOME HARD-ASS?

HE WENT IN AT 16 PROBABLY GOT A WINO TO SIGN FOR HIM.

I GOT A WINO TO SIGN FOR ME TOO. AFTER HE DID, I SAID, "THANKS, DAD."

YOU STILL BOUGHT HIM BOOZE.

GENTLEMEN, BE SEATED.

MY NAME IS SERGEANT MAJOR ZACK CAREY.

THESE LITTLE CHATS ARE USUALLY FULL OF CRAP.

I'LL KEEP IT SHORT.

THE BOTTOM LINE IS WE'LL GET OUR COLLECTIVE SHIT TOGETHER.

WE'LL MAKE THIS OUTFIT COMBAT-READY.

COMING OVER HERE,

I SAW A COUPLE OF INDIVIDUALS LOOKING LIKE RAGBAGS.

THAT STOPS NOW.

NORMALLY, IF I WAS A BATTALION SERGEANT MAJOR,

SOME CLOWN STARTS TELLING ME HOW TO RUN MY PEOPLE,

I'M GONNA PERSONALLY TELL HIM TO KEEP HIS NOSE OUT OF MY BUSINESS.

BUT THESE ARE NOT NORMAL TIMES,

SO I WILL PARK IN YOUR POCKETS.

CONCERNING QUALITY OF TRAINING, MORE DETAILS LATER.

CONCERNING QUALITY OF LIFE,

WE WILL HANDLE OUR PEOPLE'S PROBLEMS.

WHATEVER IT TAKES TO KEEP OUR PEOPLE'S MINDS ON THEIR WORK,

THAT'S WHAT WE'LL DO.

FOR ME, AT LEAST, THE ARMY IS FAMILY.

WE WILL TAKE CARE OF OUR OWN

BY THE BOOK, BUT WITH TACT--

AND BY TACT I MEAN DON'T LET THE BULLSHIT REACH THE BRASS.

WE WILL HANDLE OUR PROBLEMS IN-HOUSE.

WHEN A PROBLEM REACHES

YOUR COMPANY OR BATTALION COMMANDER'S HANDS,

IT'LL CATCH THE ATTENTION OF THAT 600-POUND GORILLA

WITH TWO STARS ON HIS COLLAR.

AND SHIT ROLLS DOWNHILL.

KEEP THAT GORILLA OFF MY BACK,

THAT'LL KEEP ME OFF YOURS.

I WANT A BEER BAR ON THIS POST WITH A SOFT JUKEBOX

SO OLD FARTS LIKE ME CAN SIP OUR SUDS IN PEACE

AND NOT HAVE TO DANCE THE FUNKY MONKEY.

THANK YOU, GENTLEMEN.

[ BUZZ ]

YOUR DIVISION SERGEANT MAJOR

IS ALL ALONE ON THE BATTALION FIELD!

[ WHISTLE BLOWS ]

[ MAN SHOUTING COMMANDS ]

MORNING, SERGEANT MAJOR. AND A FINE ONE IT IS.

CARE TO TAKE THE AIR WITH ME?

IT WOULD BE THE HIGHLIGHT OF OUR DAY.

BATTALION!

COMPANY, RIGHT FACE!

FORWARD BATTALION, MARCH! HOO!

COLUMN LEFT, MARCH!

DOUBLE TIME!

[ MEN SHOUTING ]

[ MEN CLAPPING AND CHANTING ]

[ CHANTING APPROACHING ]

I'M GONNA ROCK THE LIVIN' DAY!

SHAKE, RATTLE, AND ROLL, EVERYBODY!

SHAKE, RATTLE, AND ROLL, EVERYBODY!

SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE A LITTLE LONGER!

SHAKE, RATTLE, AND ROLL, HEY!

PICK 'EM UP! SET 'EM DOWN!

ROCK IT! ALL RIGHT!

HERE WE GO!

BYE, MOM.

LaDONNA! LaDONNA!

BILLY! LaDONNA! WE DID IT!

HELP ME WITH THESE GROCERY BAGS.

DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO?

WE GOT THE BOAT? YOU BETTER BELIEVE WE GOT THE BOAT.

THEY TOOK OUR OFFER, LOCKED IN AT THE SAME RATE.

YAHOO!

LET'S FORGET THAT HAM IN THE OVEN

AND HAVE DINNER OUT.

I HAVE THE N.C.O. WIVES' CLUB MEETING HERE TONIGHT.

YOU SAID YOU'D EAT OUT.

SCREW THE N.C.O. WIVES.

LET'S GO CELEBRATE. I CAN'T DO THAT.

BEST NEWS IN 10 YEARS, BILLY'S OUT ON A DATE,

AND YOU'VE GOT THAT CREW OF AMAZONS!

I TOLD YOU FIVE TIMES ABOUT TONIGHT.

HAVE DINNER IN TOWN.

* MY PRETTY GIRL

* SELL ME SOME DREAMS

* MY PRETTY GIRL...

ONE OF THESE DAYS, I'LL GO TO BEAUTICIAN SCHOOL.

I DID MY GIRLFRIENDS' HAIR IN HIGH SCHOOL.

YEAH?

MAYBE I'LL GO TO CALIFORNIA.

THIS GIRL IN PLAYBOY OWNS A BARBER SHOP.

I WANT MY OWN PLACE.

NO CRAP FROM NOBODY.

I'LL DRINK TO NO MORE CRAP.

I'LL NAME MY BOAT THE NO MORE CRAP.

MAYBE I'LL NAME IT AFTER YOU. THE SARAH.

THAT'S IT. THE SARAH.

LONG MAY SHE SAIL.

THE SARAH.

I'VE BEEN IN THE ARMY ALMOST 30 YEARS.

'BOUT TIME I WENT NAVY.

LIKE TO HEAR A SONG?

ON THE JUKEBOX?

NO. I'LL GIVE YOU A RARE TREAT.

I'LL SING YOU AN OLD SEA SHANTY

IN THE KEY OF Z-FLAT.

* WHEN I WAS A LITTLE BOY *

* SO MY MOTHER TOLD ME *

* WAY, HAUL AWAY

* WE'LL HAUL AWAY, JOE

* IF I DID NOT KISS THE GIRLS *

* MY LIPS WOULD GROW ALL MOLDY *

* WAY, HAUL AWAY

* WE'LL HAUL AWAY, JOE

COME ON, SHOOT THE BALL.

HOW MUCH HAVE I WON?

* WAY, HAUL AWAY

40 BUCKS AN HOUR.

* AWAY, JOE. THEN HE GOT... *

SHOOT THE BALL.

SHIT!

JUST SHUT UP FROM HERE ON OUT.

I'LL BUST YOUR HEAD.

HEY!

CUT OUT THAT WARBLING. THERE'S A GAME GOING ON.

I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT, DEPUTY.

BAD MANNERS TO BE SINGING DURING A GAME.

I'LL BUY YOU A BEER.

DON'T NEED YOU TO BUY ME NO BEER.

SARAH, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE TURNING TRICKS.

DON'T WASTE TIME ON THIS OLD BOY.

PROBABLY COULDN'T GET IT UP ANYWAY.

GET YOUR ASS UP AND EARN SOME MONEY.

DON'T DO THAT.

SAY WHAT?

NO NEED FOR THAT.

AIN'T NO NEED FOR NO ARMY SCUMBAG

TELLING ME WHAT TO DO

IN MY TOWN, WITH MY WHORE.

YOU KNOW SOMETHING?

YOU'RE JUST AS RIGHT AS RAIN.

YOUR TOWN, YOUR WHORE.

IS THAT RIGHT?

YOU PROVED YOUR POINT.

DEPUTY, LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE SOMEONE TO--

HE'S GOT THE GUN!

WHY DID YOU DO THAT?

HE ONLY SLAPPED ME AROUND.

I COULD HAVE LOST MY JOB, ASSHOLE!

DON'T GET SENTIMENTAL.

A SIMPLE "THANK YOU" WOULD DO.

[ DOORBELL BUZZES ]

[ BUZZ ]

ALL RIGHT, I'M COMING, I'M COMING.

WHAT THE HELL IS ALL THAT RACKET?

ZACK?

WHAT'S THE PROBLEM? IT'S 2:00 IN THE MORNING.

WE GOT TO TALK.

I DID AN EL DUMMO. I'LL ADMIT IT.

I KNOW THESE CRACKER TOWNS.

DOLLARS TO DOUGHNUTS THE LOCAL CONSTABULARY

WILL BE IN PROVOST MARSHAL'S OFFICE

LOOKING TO STICK MY ASS IN JAIL.

YOU GONNA PAY FOR THE DAMAGES?

I'LL PAY THE GUY 500 TO COOL THINGS OUT.

YOU MIGHT HAVE TO GO HIGHER.

THE SHERIFF'S A MEAN CRACKER.

MORNING, SHERIFF.

GOOD MORNING.

WOULD YOU LIKE SOME COFFEE?

THANK YOU KINDLY. I BELIEVE I WOULD.

IN MY OFFICE, PLEASE, EUCLID.

YES, SIR.

EUCLID?

YES, SIR?

WHERE IS HE?

WHO'S THAT, SHERIFF?

HE'S NOT IN OUR JAIL.

AND I DON'T SEE NO ARREST REPORT.

ON WHO, SIR?

HE IN THE HOSPITAL?

I'D LIKE TO BELIEVE THAT.

UM...SHERIFF...

I...UH...

OR IN THE MORGUE?

THERE SHOULD BE A REPORT HERE.

DON'T YOU CARE ABOUT YOUR PAPERWORK?

SHERIFF, I'M NOT, UH...

SURE I KNOW WHO YOU MEAN.

LOOK AT YOUR FACE, SON.

SOMEBODY MARKED IT UP WHEN YOU WAS ON DUTY.

WHEN ON DUTY, YOU REPRESENT ME.

YES, SIR.

WHO MARKED YOU UP WHILE YOU WAS REPRESENTING ME?

BECAUSE NOW I'VE GOT MARKS ON MY FACE.

THAT I CAN'T HAVE.

SPELL ME.

HE'S OUT THERE, BIG AS LIFE.

WELL, JESUS CHRIST!

THAT SON OF A BITCH HAS GOT NERVE.

JESUS CHRIST ON A CRUTCH!

THAT'S A BREACH OF PROFESSIONAL ETIQUETTE.

COMING WITHOUT CALLING ME?

PULLING A SURPRISE INSPECTION WITHOUT LETTING ME KNOW?

A BREACH OF ETIQUETTE.

I AIN'T AFRAID OF HIM.

I'LL GET ME A MEAT CLEAVER.

I'LL BREACH THAT MOTHER'S SKULL.

SERGEANT MAJOR CAREY?

THIS IS A BREACH OF ETIQUETTE.

I WON'T TAKE THIS.

THIS IS MY MESS HALL.

KEEP YOUR NOSE OUT.

27 YEARS I BEEN RUNNING MESS HALLS.

EISENHOWER ATE MY COOKING.

I WON'T STAND FOR NO SURPRISE INSPECTIONS.

SERGEANT, I CAME IN HERE BECAUSE THE FOOD SMELLED GOOD,

I WANTED TO EAT WITH SOLDIERS,

NOT AT THE N.C.O. COUNTRY CLUB.

THE FOOD'S EXCELLENT. IT IS EXCELLENT.

PLACE IS CLEAN. I RUN A CLEAN MESS.

NOBODY SLOPS THE FOOD.

SERVED WITH PRIDE, RESPECT.

NOBODY BETTER SLOP MY FOOD!

MY COMPLIMENTS TO YOU AND YOUR ENTIRE STAFF.

YOU TASTE THAT APPLE COBBLER?

I WAS GOING TO.

TASTE THAT, THEN YOU TALK ABOUT MY FOOD.

SERGEANT.

YEAH?

BEST FUCKING APPLE COBBLER I EVER TASTED.

GIVE THAT MAN SECONDS!

MORNING, SARAH.

MORNING, SHERIFF.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN WONDER WOMAN?

WHO?

WONDER WOMAN, LIKE ON TV. DO YOU BELIEVE IN HER?

NO, SIR.

WELL, NOW, THAT'S GOOD.

HOW ABOUT THE LONE RANGER?

IS THERE REALLY A LONE RANGER, LIKE IN THE COMICS?

SHERIFF, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION, SISTER SARAH.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE LONE RANGER?

NO, SIR.

AH, LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE!

YOU THINK THE LONE RANGER WEARS ARMY GREEN.

THAT'S DANGEROUS FOR A LADY IN YOUR POSITION.

YOU DO BUSINESS WITH THEM PEOPLE, OF COURSE.

BUT THAT'S ALL.

DON'T GET PERSONAL WITH THEM.

THEY AIN'T OUR KIND.

THAT'S A LESSON YOU'LL HAVE TO LEARN. YOU GOT TO LEARN IT GOOD.

SO...

PULL UP YOUR LITTLE SHIRT.

TAKE DOWN YOUR DRAWERS.

TURN OVER. GET TO IT.

I'M GOING TO TEACH YOU

THERE REALLY AIN'T NO LONE RANGER.

I GOT THIS ONE.

I'D LIKE TO SEE THE PROVOST MARSHAL.

HE'S NOT IN. CAN I HELP?

WELL, MAYBE YOU CAN.

I BET YOU KNOW WHO HE IS.

HE'S A MASTER SERGEANT, OR SOME SUCH THING.

FIRST NAME'S ZACK.

HE'S WANTED FOR BATTERY ON MY DEPUTY,

AND WHATEVER ELSE I CAN THINK OF.

LOOK NO FURTHER.

WE GOT HIM. I WANT HIM.

HE TURNED HIMSELF IN TO THE MPs LAST NIGHT.

HE'LL BE SORRY WHEN WE GET THROUGH.

HOW MUCH WILL HE HAVE TO PAY?

HE'LL PAY, ALL RIGHT.

FIRST, HE'LL SPEND TIME IN MY JAIL.

IT'S LUCKY WE GOT A CHANCE TO TALK.

I'LL SAVE YOU ALL KINDS OF PAPERWORK.

YOU'RE AWARE OF THE SUPREME COURT DECISION,

CLARENCE VERSUS KERN COUNTY,

RULING THAT ALL MILITARY PERSONNEL

COMMITTING A CRIME IN CIVILIAN JURISDICTION--

I DON'T WANT SUPREME COURT CRAP!

I WANT THAT SON OF A BITCH.

I WANT HIS NAME. I WANT HIM IN JAIL.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND, BOY?

YES, SIR.

I SURE DO.

THE MILITARY DON'T WANT TROUBLE WITH YOUR TOWN.

I'LL HAVE HIM IN 15 MINUTES.

THAT'S WHAT I LIKE.

IF YOU WANT HIM THAT BAD,

YOU GOT A PROBLEM WE'LL NIP IN THE BUD.

I DON'T SEE YOU LOCATING MY MAN.

I'LL HAVE HIM HERE WITH CUFFS ON.

WILL THAT DO? IF YOU DO IT.

AND BY 5:00, YOUR TOWN WILL BE OFF-LIMITS

TO ALL MILITARY PERSONNEL.

WE DON'T WANT YOU TO HAVE PROBLEMS WITH THE ARMY,

SO TAKE HIM.

AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT SOLDIERS

IN ANY OF YOUR BARS

OR YOUR RESTAURANTS OR YOUR WHOREHOUSES.

THAT SHOULD CURE YOUR PROBLEM.

OKAY, SAMBO. YOU WIN THIS ONE.

THERE'S MORE THAN ONE WAY TO SKIN A CAT.

YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT, JIM.

BY THE WAY...

YOU BEST WATCH HOW YOU DRIVE OFF THIS POST.

THIS IS FEDERAL PROPERTY.

YOU MIGHT SPEND TIME IN MY JAIL.

EUCLID!

I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT SERGEANT MAJOR.

I WANT IT ALL, AND TODAY.

[ CHILD CRYING OUT ]

HOLD HIM STILL.

IT'S GOING TO BE OK.

DADDY'S NOT MAD AT YOU ANYMORE.

IT'S OKAY, BRIAN.

[ KNOCKING ]

COME IN.

CORPORAL HARRIS REPORTING. YOU WANTED TO SEE ME?

SIT DOWN, CORPORAL.

I SAW YOUR SON AT THE HOSPITAL.

HE'S PRETTY BADLY BEAT UP. DID YOU DO IT?

ACCORDING TO THE ARMY, THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

I CAN CALL THE PROVOST, BUT--

NOBODY'S PRESSING CHARGES.

HEY, CORPORAL, YOU WANT TO MAKE IT HARD?

I'M TRYING TO KEEP THIS INSIDE THIS OFFICE.

FINE. LET'S KEEP IT HERE.

YOUR WIFE'S SCARED TO FILE A COMPLAINT.

SOONER OR LATER, IT'LL BLOW UP.

I'M TRYING TO AVOID THAT.

WE GOT GOOD COUNSELING HERE.

I WANT YOU TO VOLUNTEER. NOBODY WILL KNOW.

I'LL KEEP IT QUIET.

BUT YOU NEED HELP, SON. IS THAT IT?

YOU'RE NOT GOING FOR IT?

AM I DISMISSED?

LET ME PUT IT ANOTHER WAY.

THE NEXT TIME YOU'RE LOSING CONTROL

AND WANT TO HIT SOMEBODY, YOU COME HIT ME.

WE CAN PUT ON GLOVES OR DUKE IT OUT--

LOOK. MY FAMILY IS MY BUSINESS!

IT'S NOT YOUR GODDAMN--

HEAR THIS, ASSHOLE!

I'M CHECKING THAT HOSPITAL DAILY.

IF THAT BOY'S IN THERE, I'LL DESTROY YOU.

MY RETIREMENT, MY STRIPES,

THE STOCKADE WON'T MEAN SHIT.

I'LL DESTROY YOU IN A HEARTBEAT!

DO YOU BELIEVE THAT? DO YOU?

YES, SERGEANT MAJOR.

YOU WILL GET SOME COUNSELING. DISMISSED!

HI, BILL.

HI, DAD.

WHERE'S MOM? SHOPPING, I GUESS.

YOU'RE CRACKING THE BOOKS EARLY, AREN'T YOU?

I'VE GOT BASKETBALL PRACTICE AND AN EARLY DATE.

SMELLS LIKE MOM'S COOKING UP A GOOD DINNER.

DID YOU CHECK THAT EARLY DATE OUT WITH HER?

YEAH, I TOLD HER THIS MORNING.

THINK YOU'LL MISS SOME GOOD HAM, SON.

OH, CHRIST.

I'M GETTING TOO OLD FOR IT.

FOR HAM?

NO, ALL THE BULLSHIT.

I HAD A CLOWN IN MY OFFICE TODAY,

BEAT UP HIS 5-YEAR-OLD BOY.

COULD'VE BROKEN HIS NECK.

WHEN YOU RAISE A KID RIGHT, THEN HE GETS KILLED,

AND YOU SEE THAT.

TURNS YOUR STOMACH.

DAD? I WAS THINKING.

IF WE GET THAT BOAT,

MAYBE WE COULD CALL IT JOHNNY BOY.

I DON'T NEED A BOAT TO REMIND ME OF YOUR BROTHER.

I THOUGHT IT'D BE NICE, SINCE HE WAS YOUR FAVORITE.

WAIT. YOU WANT TO RUN THAT BY ME AGAIN?

NOT REALLY.

BILL... COME OVER HERE.

COME OVER AND SIT DOWN.

DO YOU EVER THINK I WISH IT WAS YOU

INSTEAD OF YOUR BROTHER THAT WAS DEAD?

THAT QUESTION SUCKS. YES, IT DOES.

IT'D BE ROTTEN IF YOU BELIEVED THAT, AND IT ISN'T TRUE.

JOHNNY WAS YOUR FIRST-BORN.

IT'S NATURAL YOU'D FEEL MORE FOR HIM.

MAKES SENSE, DOESN'T IT? NO, IT DOESN'T.

WE FELT SOMETHING DIFFERENT FOR HIM,

BUT NOT ANYTHING MORE OR BETTER.

MOM ALWAYS SAID YOU AND JOHNNY WERE ALIKE.

YOU HAD TO FEEL SOMETHING MORE.

BECAUSE WE WERE ALIKE, WHEN HE WAS LITTLE WE GOT ALONG,

BUT WHEN HE WAS A TEENAGER,

HE TRIED TO PROVE THINGS TO ME.

MAYBE THAT'S WHY HE GOT KILLED.

BUT I SWEAR, NOT FOR ONE SECOND

DID I WISH IT WAS YOU THAT GOT IT.

YOU STRAIGHT ON THAT?

YES, SIR.

I GOT TO GO.

BILL?

YOU SQUARED AWAY ON ALL THAT?

YES, SIR.

BREAK IT UP!

WILLIAM CAREY!

YES, SIR?

MR. TAYLOR WANTS TO SPEAK TO YOU.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND. WHY DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY LOCKER?

IT MIGHT BE NOTHING.

IT'S JUST SOMETHING WE WANT TO CHECK OUT.

THESE MEN ARE DEPUTY SHERIFFS.

THEY'VE GOT QUESTIONS.

THIS YOUR LOCKER?

YES, SIR.

WANT TO OPEN IT?

THAT'S NOT MY LOCK.

JUST OPEN THE LOCKER.

THAT'S NOT MY LOCK.

HONEST, THAT'S NOT MY LOCK.

WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE RECEIVED REPORTS

THAT YOU'VE BEEN SELLING MARIJUANA.

THAT'S NOT TRUE!

ASK THE JANITOR TO OPEN THAT LOCK.

GO AHEAD.

EXCUSE ME.

WELL, WELL, WELL.

LOOKEE WHAT WE GOT HERE.

I'D LIKE TO SEE THE SHERIFF, PLEASE.

WELL, RIGHT THIS WAY THERE, GENERAL.

RIGHT THIS WAY.

SOMEONE TO SEE YOU, SHERIFF.

OKAY.

SHERIFF SAYS OKAY.

WELL, SHERIFF, UH...

BUELTON.

I AM ZACK CAREY.

I DID A DUMB THING THE OTHER NIGHT,

THEN TRIED TO WEASEL OUT OF IT.

I'M SORRY. YOU WIN, I LOSE.

NOW, WHAT CAN I DO TO GET MY SON BACK?

EUCLID, BRING YOUR CAMERA IN HERE.

YOU WOULDN'T MIND POSIN' FOR A PICTURE WITH ME, WOULD YOU?

IF NOT, SERGEANT,

BACK OVER AGAINST THAT WALL.

RIGHT OVER HERE.

EUCLID'S NEVER SEEN A TALKING ASSHOLE BEFORE,

AND I'D LIKE HIM TO HAVE A SOUVENIR PHOTO OF IT.

ALL RIGHT, EUCLID.

I THINK I'LL CALL THIS,

"SHERIFF BUELTON GETS HIS MAN,"

UNLESS YOU GOT A BETTER IDEA.

WELL, LET'S SEE WHAT WE GOT HERE, SERGEANT.

"WILLIAM CAREY--

"POSSESSION OF NARCOTICS,

"POSSESSION WITH INTENT TO SELL SAME,

"ASSAULTING A PEACE OFFICER,

AND RESISTING ARREST."

IF I KNOW THE JUDGE--

AND HE'S MY BROTHER-IN-LAW--

THIS COULD GET THAT BOY OF YOURS

TWO YEARS ON THE COUNTY FARM.

ALL RIGHT, SHERIFF,

LIKE I SAID, YOU WIN.

GIVE ME A NUMBER. I'LL PAY.

YOU GET TO THE HEART OF THE MATTER.

I'M GOING TO LET YOU COME UP WITH THE NUMBER,

BUT AFTER YOU'VE VISITED OUR CORRECTIONAL FACILITY.

MOVE IT! MOVE IT!

COME ON, BOY!

MOVE IT! MOVE IT! MOVE IT!

COME ON, BOY!

COME ON, COME ON. HURRY!

WE PRACTICE A MODERN FORM OF PENOLOGY HERE.

WE TRY TO REHABILITATE THE PRISONERS

THROUGH A SYSTEM OF POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE FEEDBACK.

THE WORK HERE, THAT'S A PRIVILEGE.

AND THAT'S POSITIVE FEEDBACK.

ON THE OTHER HAND, WELL...

TRUSTEE JACKSON!

YEAH, BOSS!

SHOW US AN EXAMPLE OF NEGATIVE FEEDBACK.

RIGHT NOW, BOSS.

YOU, BOY!

YOU'RE LAZY! THAT'S WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!

I GET THE POINT.

YOU DON'T NEED TO DO THIS FOR ME.

NO, SERGEANT, THIS AIN'T THE ARMY.

HERE I SAY THE "HAVE-TOs"

AND "DON'T HAVE-TOs."

I SAY THAT YOUNGSTER'S MALINGERING.

THAT'S ANTISOCIAL BEHAVIOR THAT CALLS FOR NEGATIVE FEEDBACK.

SHUT UP!

SHUT UP! SHUT UP!

YOU'RE JUST LAZY. THAT'S ALL THAT'S WRONG!

I HOPE YOU FOUND OUR TOUR HELPFUL.

GIVE ME A NUMBER, AND YOU GOT IT.

THAT'S THE TROUBLE WITH YOUR KIND.

YOU DON'T APPRECIATE SUBTLETY.

YOU COME DOWN HERE TO CHANGE OUR WAYS,

BECAUSE THE SUPREME COURT'S ON YOUR SIDE.

YOU'RE FINDING OUT WE AIN'T BROKEN-LEGGED.

WANT A NUMBER? $10,000.

WHAT DO YOU THINK THE ARMY PAYS?

I WOULDN'T KNOW. I'M AN IGNORANT CRACKER,

BUT SOLDIER MAGAZINE WROTE A STORY ON YOU.

SAID YOU OWNED YOUR OWN TANK

AND JUST BOUGHT A FANCY BOAT.

THAT SOUNDS LIKE A MILLIONAIRE TO A POOR BOY LIKE ME.

I BET YOU COULD SELL THAT BOAT

AND RAISE THAT MONEY.

[ GATE BUZZES ]

OH, SERGEANT...

UH...ONE MORE THING.

I THINK IT WOULD BE INADVISABLE

FOR YOU TO BRING SOME JEW LAWYER HERE

TO TALK ABOUT CIVIL RIGHTS.

I'D HAVE YOUR BOY ON THIS FARM

BEFORE YOU CAN SAY "HABEAS CORPUS."

OKAY, SHERIFF, YOU'LL GET EVERYTHING YOU WANT,

BUT REMEMBER, ANYTHING HAPPENS TO MY BOY,

NOTHING WILL PREVENT ME FROM KILLING YOU.

HE'S THE ONLY THING KEEPING YOU ALIVE.

AND VICE VERSA, SERGEANT.

YOU REMEMBER THAT.

BILLY, ARE YOU OKAY?

I DIDN'T DO WHAT THEY SAY.

SOMEBODY'S ELSE'S LOCK WAS ON MY LOCKER.

IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.

THEN WHY AM I SITTING IN THIS JAIL? NO, IT'S THE SHERIFF.

THE SHERIFF'S USING YOU TO GET ME.

I'LL DO WHAT HE WANTS, THEN YOU'RE OUT.

BUT WHY, DAD?

IT'S A LONG STORY.

ONCE YOU'RE OUT, I'LL TELL YOU EVERYTHING.

YOU'LL GET OUT, UNDERSTAND?

OKAY. CAN YOU HANG IN HERE?

YES, SIR. THAT'S THE WAY TO TALK TO THESE GUYS--

"YES, SIR" AND "NO, SIR."

IN A DAY OR TWO,

YOU'LL BE OUT OF HERE, I PROMISE.

HAVE I EVER BROKEN A PROMISE?

NO, SIR.

I'M NOT GONNA START. I PROMISE YOU

I WILL GET YOU OUT OF HERE.

THAT'S A PROMISE.

BASTARD! YOU ROTTEN, FILTHY BASTARD!

MY BABY'S IN JAIL, BECAUSE YOU WENT WHORING.

WE'LL GET BILLY BACK,

THEN YOU DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO.

OH, NO.

I'VE GOT THIS FIGURED OUT.

WE CAN CUT THOSE BILLS--

NO! WE ARE GETTING A LAWYER!

OUR SON WILL NOT BE HANDLED

BETWEEN GOOD OL' BOYS.

YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TALK.

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. THIS GUY'S EVIL.

WE'RE NOT DOING THINGS HIS WAY OR YOUR WAY.

I'M GETTING A LAWYER. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TELL ME DIFFERENT.

YOU LEFT YOUR RIGHTS ON A BARROOM FLOOR!

LaDONNA! LaDONNA!

ALL RIGHT, TALK TO A LAWYER,

BUT DON'T TAKE ANY ACTION

WITHOUT TELLING ME FIRST.

I'LL DO THE SAME. OKAY?

OKAY?

[ HORN HONKS ]

ZACK!

[ HORN HONKING ]

ZACK!

FIRST SERGEANT, TAKE OVER THE INSPECTION.

WHAT IS IT?

I TRIED, ZACK. I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEANT.

I DIDN'T BELIEVE YOU. BELIEVE ME ABOUT WHAT?

ABOUT THE SHERIFF. OH, CHRIST!

MOVE OVER.

HE'S HERE, SHERIFF.

WELL, LOOKEE WHO'S HERE-- MR. STUPID.

YOU ARE AS DUMB AS YOU CAN BE.

I TOLD HIM NOT TO BRING LAWYERS IN,

BUT HE WOULDN'T LISTEN TO ME.

WE GET SOME BIG LAWYER IN FROM OUT OF COUNTY,

WE DON'T WANT TO WASTE HIS TIME,

SO WE HELD A TRIAL. NOW YOU KNOW WHAT?

YOUR LAWYER'S IN JAIL--CONTEMPT OF COURT.

WE'LL FINISH THIS CONVERSATION IN MY OFFICE.

TAKE THE MONEY.

GIVE ME MY SON.

PLEASE.

OH, YOU DO KNOW THE MAGIC WORD.

SERGEANT, IT'S MY SAD DUTY TO REPORT

YOUR SON WAS SENTENCED

TO THREE YEARS ON THE COUNTY FARM.

I'LL TAKE THE MONEY.

IT'LL KEEP HIM ALIVE FOR A YEAR.

AFTER THAT, I'LL TAKE MORE.

WE MADE A DEAL!

ANY MORE LAWYER NOISE,

AND HE'LL BE SHOT ATTEMPTING ESCAPE.

YES, SIR.

I GOT POWER TO DO ALMOST ANYTHING ON THAT FARM,

EXCEPT STOP THE COURSE OF TRUE LOVE.

THAT I CAN'T DO.

YOU SEE, UNFORTUNATELY,

WE DO HAVE SOME DEGENERATES ON THE FARM.

UNLESS I'M MISTAKEN,

THEY'LL FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR LITTLE BOY.

OF COURSE, IT WILL BE

A LEARNIN' EXPERIENCE FOR HIM.

SHERIFF TOLD ME WHY I WAS HERE,

BEFORE HE BEAT ME.

'CAUSE OF YOU AND YOUR WHORE! BILL.

WAS SHE WORTH IT?

LOOK AT ME!

[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]

HUBIK.

ARE YOU SURE?

WELL, STOP HIM. BLOCK THE MAIN GATE.

[ MEN CLAMORING ]

[ TANK APPROACHING ]

[ POUNDING ON DOOR ]

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT! I'M COMING!

SOMEBODY BETTER HAVE A GOOD REASON FOR KNOCKING,

OR THEY'LL SPEND TIME IN JAIL!

OH, LORD.

I DO BELIEVE I GOT YOU COVERED.

OH, JESUS.

OH, LORD. UH...UH...

PLEASE, MISTER. I...

BRING MY SON OUT.

DON'T BE CUTE. I'M IN A BAD MOOD.

I WANT TO, SERGEANT, I SWEAR TO JESUS,

BUT THE SHERIFF THOUGHT YOU MIGHT PULL THAT LEGAL STUFF,

SO HE TRANSFERRED HIM TO THE COUNTY FARM.

HE'S ON THE WORK DETAIL.

WHO'S INSIDE THE JAIL?

UH...JUST A COUPLE OF DRUNKS.

HE'S LYING.

SHUT YOUR MOUTH.

YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAPPEN

IF I PULLED THIS TRIGGER?

HE'S GOT YOUR LAWYER IN THERE.

GET THE DEPUTY'S KEYS AND LET EVERYBODY OUT.

YES, SIR.

WHERE'S THE SHERIFF?

AT THE STATE CAPITOL

MEETING WITH THE GOVERNOR. IS THAT SO?

I SWEAR ON MY MAMA'S EYES.

RIP THE RADIO OUT OF THAT SQUAD CAR.

UH...UH... I CAN'T DO THAT.

THAT THERE'S A NEW RADIO. THE SHERIFF WOULD KILL ME.

YEAH. YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT.

OH, SHIT!

DO TELEPHONE CALLS GO THROUGH THOSE BOXES?

THEY SURE DO.

HOLY SHIT!

MY CAR! MY GODDAMN CAR!

OH...SHIT!

SARAH, GIVE ME THAT GUN BELT.

YOU, COME HERE.

COME ON.

NOW, STRIP.

GO ON. STRIP.

[ CROWD LAUGHS ]

SHIT.

DON'T LET THIS TAKE ALL DAY.

HERE, SARAH.

HANDCUFF HIM TO THAT POST OVER THERE.

GO ON. GO!

CAN I GO WITH YOU?

I CAN'T STAY HERE.

JUMP ON.

YEAH.

LET'S GO.

OKAY, NOW. YOU STAY THERE.

CLOSE THE HATCH.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

YOU'RE CRAZY!

LIE DOWN, BILLY, I'M COMING TO GET YOU.

LIE DOWN.

DAMN IT, LIE DOWN!

YOU'RE CRAZY! YOU'LL GET US KILLED!

OOH!

YEA! ALL RIGHT! YEA!

HOORAY! OKAY! YEA!

WELL, WHERE IS THIS INVADING ARMY WE'RE SUPPOSED TO STOP?

HOLY SHIT!

I'D SURE LIKE TO HELP, BUT--

GOVERNOR, I GOT A CRAZY SERGEANT.

I GOT A DOPE FIEND, AND A HOOKER

IN A SHERMAN TANK!

THEY'VE DESTROYED THREE SQUAD CARS,

TWO TRUCKS, MY OFFICE, AND A '74 CHEVY!

CALL OUT THE NATIONAL GUARD

AND BLOW THAT SON OF A BITCH AWAY!

I SUPPOSE I COULD, BUT THAT WOULD TAKE A LOT OF TIME.

SEE WHAT THE ARMY CAN DO FOR YOU, BUDDY.

IN CLEMMONSVILLE TODAY,

THERE WAS AN UNUSUAL PRISON BREAK.

SERGEANT MAJOR ZACK CAREY BROKE HIS SON OUT

OF THE COUNTY CORRECTIONAL FACILITY

USING A SHERMAN TANK.

ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU, SON.

WHAT'S YOUR BIG PLAN?

WE'LL HEAD FOR THE TENNESSEE STATE LINE

OVER BACK ROADS AND BROKEN COUNTRY.

IT'LL SLOW THEM DOWN.

WHAT'S SHE DOING HERE?

BILL,

LOOK, ONCE YOU GET ACROSS THE STATE LINE,

IF THEY WANT YOU, THEY HAVE TO EXTRADITE YOU.

THAT MEANS A FAIR HEARING IN A COURT OF LAW.

WHAT'S SHE? MY LAWYER?

AT THAT HEARING, SARAH WILL TESTIFY

THAT SHE WAS FORCED INTO PROSTITUTION,

AND YOU AND I CAN TELL OUR STORY.

THEY'LL BELIEVE US OVER A SHERIFF?

THAT SHERIFF IS NOT PART OF THE SYSTEM.

IN A FAIR HEARING, A LAWYER CAN WORK.

WE'RE NOT RUNNING AWAY FROM THE LAW.

WE'RE RUNNING T THE LAW, BILL.

WE'LL WIN.

THEY'LL LOSE, GENERAL!

THEY'RE GOING DOWN IN FLAMES, AND YOU'RE GOING TO HELP.

I CAN HAVE THE GOVERNOR CALL YOUR SUPERIOR.

EITHER WAY, WANT TO SEE SOME TANKS ROLLING OUT OF HERE TO STOP THAT MANIAC.

I DON'T TAKE ORDERS FROM GOVERNORS.

SERGEANT MAJOR CAREY'S RESIGNED.

HE'S COMMITTED NO CRIME IN MY JURISDICTION.

HE STOLE A TANK! IT'S HIS TANK.

ALL HE DID WAS BUST A FENCE.

I'M THE LOCAL CIVILIAN AUTHORITY.

I'M MAKING A FORMAL REQUEST OF THE MILITARY

TO DO EVERYTHING IN ITS POWER TO ASSIST ME IN APPREHENDING--

POSSE COMITATUS, SHERIFF.

DID YOU CALL ME A PUSSY COMMUNIST?

THE U.S. ARMY IS,

BY CONGRESS' POSSE COMITATUS ACT,

PRECLUDED FROM ENFORCING CIVILIAN LAW

OUTSIDE THE MILITARY RESERVATION.

PUSSY COMMUNIST?

I CANNOT PROVIDE YOU WITH MILITARY EQUIPMENT OR PERSONNEL

WITHOUT A DIRECT ORDER FROM MY SUPERIOR OR THE PRESIDENT.

I CAN GIVE YOU HIS ADDRESS.

SHERIFF CYRUS BUELTON

HAS DEPUTIZED AN ADDITIONAL 200 MEN

TO HELP APPREHEND THE TANK

BEFORE IT REACHES THE TENNESSEE STATE LINE,

APPARENTLY ITS DESTINATION,

ACCORDING TO A CB BROADCAST FROM SERGEANT CAREY.

NOW...

A TANK IS NOT WHAT YOU WANT TO CALL

A FUEL-EFFICIENT VEHICLE.

HE AIN'T DRIVING A TOYOTA!

IT AIN'T FAR TO EMPTY ON A SHERMAN TANK.

I'M PUTTING ONE OF YOU

IN EVERY FILLING STATION BETWEEN HERE AND THE STATE LINE.

HE'LL HAVE TO PUMP HIS OWN GAS.

WHEN THAT HAPPENS, IT'LL BE MY PLEASURE

TO SHOOT THAT SERGEANT IN HIS PRIVATES.

[ DOGS BARKING ]

WHO'S THAT OUT THERE?

DON'T MAKE ANY NOISE.

I DON'T WANT TO HURT YOU.

I JUST NEED SOME GAS.

OKAY?

YOU THE ONE THEY TALKING ABOUT ON TELEVISION WITH THAT TANK?

MAYBE.

MY SISTER HAD A BOY ON THAT FARM.

HE NEVER CAME BACK. YOU'RE WELCOME TO ANYTHING YOU NEED.

[ LIQUID POURING ]

ALL RIGHT, MR. GANT.

THAT OUGHT TO DO HER.

I THANK YOU, SIR.

THANK YOUR WIFE FOR HER CHICKEN.

YOU'RE WELCOME, MA'AM.

BEST OF LUCK, SERGEANT.

THANK YOU.

SERGEANT, MY WIFE'S A CHURCH-GOING WOMAN.

SHE'S PRAYING FOR Y'ALL.

THAT'S NICE. THANK YOU.

OKAY, YOU GUYS. FINISH EATING.

WE'RE GOING TO MOVE OUT.

NOW, A FEW WORDS ABOUT MR. GANT.

HE HAS AIDED AND ABETTED ESCAPED FELONS.

NORMALLY, I WOULD ARREST HIM.

I CAN'T DO THAT

BECAUSE THOSE SAME FELONS DID DESTROY MY JAIL.

HOWEVER...

LONG ABOUT TONIGHT,

HE'LL WISH HE WAS IN A SAFE JAIL,

ESPECIALLY IF SOME OF HIS FELLOW CITIZENS SHOW UP

TO EXPRESS NEGATIVE FEEDBACK

ON ACCOUNT OF HIS HELPING ESCAPED CONVICTS,

DOPE ADDICTS, AND PROSTITUTES.

ISN'T THAT AN INVITATION TO VIOLENCE?

VIOLENCE DON'T NEED AN INVITATION FROM ME.

THAT FROM SHERIFF BUELTON,

CLEMMONS COUNTY'S CHIEF LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICER.

MEANWHILE, THE MANHUNT FOR THE TANK CONTINUES.

THIS IS KEN BILLINGS IN THE TV-9 SKYWATCH CHOPPER.

WE WERE ABLE TO OBTAIN THESE EXCLUSIVE PICTURES.

HOWEVER, WE WERE SPOTTED,

AND THE TANK DISAPPEARED INTO DENSE WOODS.

A TANK SHOULD BE EASY TO SPOT,

BUT WHEN CAREY DOESN'T WANT TO BE SEEN,

HE EVIDENTLY WILL NOT BE SEEN.

THERE YOU ARE, JIM. BILLY.

WE GOT THEM SPOTTED.

HE'S HEADED THROUGH THAT THICKET COUNTRY,

THEN INTO THEM BOGS.

HE'S HEADING FOR THE BOGS.

WE GOT US A POSSUM HUNT!

IF HE DOUBLES BACK,

NOBODY WILL GIVE HIM ANY GAS.

NOT AFTER WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN TONIGHT!

MY WIFE AND KIDS IS GONE!

YOU WANT TO TRY AND BURN ME OUT?

YOU GO TO IT!

I'LL TELL YOU,

I'LL TAKE TWO OF YOU WITH ME!

THIS IS THE TANK. YOU ASSHOLES BETTER MOVE!

THANKS, MR. GANT. YOU'RE WELCOME, HONEY.

HELP YOURSELF TO ANYTHING YOU NEED NOW.

BILLY, HERE. TAKE THIS.

I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT ME.

NOTHING HAPPENED BETWEEN YOUR FATHER AND ME.

WE SAT AT THE BAR, THAT'S ALL.

LOOKS LIKE THAT WAS ENOUGH.

NOTHING HAPPENED BECAUSE OF HIM. HE JUST WANTED TO TALK.

IF HE HADN'T BEEN THERE, THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED.

IF HE TOOK ME OUT BACK,

NOTHING WOULD'VE HAPPENED EITHER.

IF HE WOULD'VE BEEN LIKE ANY OTHER GUY WITH $20

THAT WOULD'VE BEEN THE END OF IT.

YOU SHOULD HATE HIM FOR NOT TAKING ME BACK THERE,

OR HATE ME FOR NOT BEING SEXY ENOUGH TO GET HIM THERE.

YOU CAN THINK OF MANY REASONS TO HATE,

BUT YOUR FATHER DESERVES BETTER.

THAT'S WHERE THE SHERIFF THINKS YOU ARE NOW.

THAT'S WHERE WE WOULD'VE BEEN.

YOU'D HAVE BEEN STUCK.

HE'S GOT 10 MACK TRUCKS BLOCKING THE ROAD.

HOW CAN WE GET AROUND THEM?

SEE THAT HOLLER? THAT'LL TAKE YOU OUT.

THAT'S STUMP COUNTRY, BUT THAT WON'T HURT THAT THING YOU DRIVIN'.

THEY'RE NOT IN THE BOGS.

THEY MUST'VE DOUBLED BACK.

THAT PUSSY COMMUNIST.

HOLD ON, YOU TWO.

WE'RE GOING FOR A ROUGH RIDE.

[ ENGINE STOPS ]

WOULDN'T THAT JUST FROST THEM?

WHAT IS IT?

I DO BELIEVE WE THREW A TRACK.

START UP THE TANK.

WHEN SARAH SAYS, INCH IT FORWARD.

ALL RIGHT.

SARAH, GET BACK.

WHEN I SAY IT'S OKAY,

TELL BILLY TO MOVE IT FORWARD. RIGHT.

DAMN IT!

ALL RIGHT...

OKAY!

NO!

BILLY, HE'S HURT!

I THINK I'VE BROKEN SOME RIBS.

DON'T MOVE, DAD. OH, IT'S MY FAULT.

NO, IT ISN'T.

GET THE FIRST AID KIT OUT OF THE TANK.

SARAH, PUT THIS STUFF BACK IN THE TANK.

I'M GETTING A DOCTOR. YOU'RE COUGHING UP BLOOD.

YOU TWO SET OUT ON FOOT.

GET ME OFF TO THE SIDE. I'M NOT LEAVING.

BILLY, LOOK, IT'S LIKE A WAR.

YOU LICK YOUR WOUNDS AFTER THE BATTLE.

HORSESHIT. I'M NOT LEAVING YOU.

I'M NOT ASKING YOU, I'M ORDERING YOU.

YOU ORDER SOLDIERS. I'M YOUR SON. I'M GETTING A DOCTOR.

NO, BILLY. LOOK, THE SHERIFF WILL GET ALL OF US.

WE DON'T HAVE ANY CHOICE. THEN WE'RE ALL GETTING OUT OF HERE.

I CAN DRIVE THIS TANK AS GOOD AS YOU.

I'LL GET US ACROSS THAT STATE LINE.

BILLY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO PROVE ANYTHING TO ME.

I'M NOT PROVING ANYTHING.

THAT'S YOU AND JOHNNY.

I'M LIKE MOM.

PRACTICAL.

I LOVE YOU...

MORE THAN ANYONE ON EARTH.

CAN YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?

YOU PUT YOUR LIFE ON THE LINE FOR ME

FOR SOMETHING THAT WASN'T YOUR FAULT.

NOW YOU CAN LEAN ON ME.

I LOVE YOU, SON.

I JUST WANT YOU SAFE. THAT'S ALL.

I KNOW.

LET'S GET ON WITH IT.

LET'S GET GOING.

YOU OKAY?

YOU SURE YOU CAN RUN THIS THING?

HE HELPED BUILD IT. YOU BETTER BELIEVE HE CAN DRIVE IT.

WE'RE NOT GOING TO MOVE BY NIGHT.

WE'LL GO ON THE MAIN ROAD.

SEE THAT CRACKER STOP A TANK.

[ ENGINE STARTS ]

16-YEAR-OLD WILLIAM CAREY BROADCAST AN S.O.S.

HIS FATHER WAS INJURED FIXING A THROWN TRACK.

WILLIAM REQUESTED FIRST AID INSTRUCTIONS.

SINCE THE BATTLE OF GANT'S FARM,

THE TANK'S CREW ARE BECOMING FOLK HEROES,

ESPECIALLY TO SCHOOL CHILDREN.

HIGH SCHOOL CHILDREN ARE HOLDING UP SIGNS

THAT READ, "RIGHT ON, TANK."

AND WHAT DOES SHERIFF BUELTON SAY?

THESE MEN ARE CRIMINALS.

WE'RE TALKING ABOUT AN ESCAPED CONVICT

AND A MAN WANTED FOR ASSAULT

AND A KNOWN-- EXCUSE THE EXPRESSION--

PROSTITUTE.

THESE PEOPLE IN THAT TANK AREN'T HEROES.

BUT THEY DO HAVE A TANK.

THE BIBLE SAYS, "MIGHT DOES NOT MAKE RIGHT."

THAT BOY MADE A SERIOUS MISTAKE

WHEN HE CAME BACK UP ON THIS ROAD.

WE'RE GONNA STOP HIM.

WE KNOW WHERE, WHEN AND HOW WE'RE GONNA DO IT.

THIS IS FORT CLEMMONS.

WE HAVE MRS. CAREY ON THE LINE.

HOW BAD'S HE HURT?

BILLY? BILLY!

YOU HAVE TO RELEASE THE BUTTON TO HEAR HIM.

MOM, HE'S GOT SOME INTERNAL BLEEDING.

YOU TELL YOUR DAD...

YOU TELL HIM I'M SORRY FOR THE STUFF I SAID.

AND I LOVE HIM.

AND I LOVE YOU.

YOU'RE A PRETTY GOOD OLD BROAD.

DON'T YOU DIE ON ME, YOU SON OF A BITCH.

DON'T YOU DARE DIE ON ME.

THIS IS JASON PRICE FROM THE GEORGIA STATE LINE,

WHERE HUNDREDS ARE GATHERED WITH MORE EVERY MINUTE

AT WHAT WILL BE THE FINISH LINE

OF THE MOST BIZARRE RACE EVER RUN

I THE TANK CAN MAKE IT.

WE'RE WITH LaDONNA CAREY

AT THE TENNESSEE STATE CAPITOL.

WHY DIDN'T THE GOVERNOR SEE YOU?

THE GOVERNOR SAID HE COULDN'T SPARE FIVE MINUTES.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

I'D LIKE TO ASK EVERY WOMAN

TO IMAGINE THAT IT WERE HER SON AND HUSBAND,

AND PHONE THE GOVERNOR.

ASK HIM TO SPARE FIVE MINUTES

JUST FIVE MINUTES

TO A WOMAN WHO'S TRYING TO SAVE HER FAMILY.

I'M GOING TO STAY HERE UNTIL HE DOES.

STATE CAPITOL.

STATE CAPITOL.

YES, HE'LL GET THE MESSAGE.

STATE CAPITOL.

300 CALLS SO FAR.

WHO NEEDS THIS SHIT?

I SAY YES, I'M HARBORING AN ESCAPED CONVICT.

I SAY NO, THEN I SHOT JESSE JAMES.

[ INTERCOM BUZZES ] WHO NEEDS IT?

YEAH?

DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO. AND KEEP ME ADVISED.

STATE TROOPERS OFFICE.

1,000 PEOPLE HAVE GATHERED

ON OUR SIDE OF THE STATE LINE.

SENATORS DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS SHIT!

TELL MRS. CAREY I'LL MEET WITH HER.

BILLY! BILLY CAREY!

THIS IS KEN BILLINGS OF WGAZ-TV 9.

WE'RE ABOVE YOU. YOU READ ME?

LOUD AND CLEAR.

HOW'S IT GOING? HOW'S YOUR DAD?

NOT TOO HOT.

HE'S GOT SOME INTERNAL BLEEDING.

WILL HE MAKE IT ACROSS THE STATE LINE?

WE'LL MAKE IT ACROSS.

WHAT WILL YOU DO THEN? WILL YOU SURRENDER?

I WON'T LET THE SHERIFF TAKE MY DAD.

THAT'S SOME KID. THAT'S SOME OLD MAN.

IF HE WANTS TO MAKE THIS THE LAST STAND AT THE ALAMO, THEN THAT'S WHAT WE'LL DO.

BECAUSE WE'VE GOT A LOAD OF FIREPOWER.

WE'LL GET TO THE REAL LAW.

FOR A LONG TIME, LIKE EVERY OTHER KID,

I THOUGHT MY DAD WAS WRONG ABOUT MANY THINGS,

BUT NOT ANYMORE.

HE DOESN'T HAVE TO PROVE ANYTHING TO ME.

THE BOTTOM LINE IS, HE'S MY FATHER AND I LOVE HIM.

IF THAT SHERIFF TRIES HURTING HIM,

I'LL BLOW HIM AWAY.

[ CHEERING ]

THAT LITTLE SHIT'S RUNNING FOR GOVERNOR.

I HAVE SYMPATHY FOR YOUR PLIGHT,

BUT THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER.

I'M ASKING THEY GET A FAIR HEARING

BEFORE YOU HAND THEM OVER TO BUELTON.

IT'S NOT QUITE THAT SIMPLE. THERE ARE OTHER CONSIDERATIONS.

WHAT CONSIDERATIONS?

THIS IS A VERY CHURCH-CONSCIOUS STATE.

I'M TALKING ABOUT A CHRISTIAN ACT OF JUSTICE.

IN ALL CANDOR, I'D FIND IT DIFFICULT

TO PUT THE PRESTIGE OF THE GOVERNORSHIP

BEHIND TWO MEN IN A TANK

WITH A 20-YEAR-OLD PROSTITUTE.

GOVERNOR, THAT'S MY HUSBAND AND SON

IN THAT TANK WITH THAT PROSTITUTE.

IF I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH THAT, WHY SHOULD YOU?

WE LOOK AT IT FROM DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES.

WELL, MY PERSPECTIVE HAS A DOZEN REPORTERS

FROM EVERY TV, RADIO STATION AND NEWSPAPER YOU CAN THINK OF,

WAITING FOR ME TO MAKE A STATEMENT.

I'LL EITHER TELL THEM

THEY HAVE A GOVERNOR TO BE PROUD OF

WHO'S WILLING TO SEE JUSTICE DONE,

NO MORE, NO LESS.

OR I'LL SAY THEIR GOVERNOR IS AN ASSHOLE!

WHICH IS IT GOING TO BE?

ARE YOU THREATENING THE GOVERNOR WITH BLACKMAIL?

YES, SIR, I AM!

EUCLID!

EUCLID!

EUCLID, WILL YOU COME HERE?

YES, SIR.

WHERE'S AAVERY?

HE'S COMING RIGHT NOW.

YOU AAVERY?

YES, SIR.

WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?

SHERIFF BUCKS LOANED IT TO ME.

HE HAD IT UP ON HIS WALL.

THEY TELL ME YOU CAN SHOOT THIS. IS THAT RIGHT?

THAT'S ALL I DID IN THE ARMY.

HERE'S THE PLAN.

THE TANK WILL COME UP THIS ROAD.

HE CAN'T GET OVER THOSE TRUCKS.

HE'LL VEER OFF THIS ROAD

INTO THIS FIELD.

HE'LL GET STUCK IN THE MUD.

THAT'LL HAPPEN.

THAT'S WHAT I SAID!

WHEN THAT HAPPENS,

YOU FIRE TO IMMOBILIZE THE TANK.

I DON'T CARE IF HE CAN SHOOT.

I DON'T WANT HIM TO MOVE.

PIECE OF CAKE.

HIT HIM IN THE TRACK, BLOW THAT TRACK.

THAT'LL STOP HIM FOR SURE.

GOVERNOR, HAVE YOU TALKED TO MRS. CAREY?

YES, WE HAVE.

HAVE YOU MADE A DECISION?

YES, WE HAVE MADE A DECISION.

IF MRS. CAREY'S HUSBAND AND SON REACH OUR JURISDICTION,

A COMPLETE HEARING WILL OCCUR

IN WHICH WE'LL EXAMINE THE FACTS

BEFORE EXTRADITION IS GRANTED.

WHERE IS MRS. CAREY?

SHE'S ON HER WAY TO THE STATE LINE.

WHERE I'LL JOIN HER WITHIN THE HOUR.

HANG IN THERE, DAD. I THINK WE'RE HOME FREE.

THE GOVERNOR WILL FIGHT THE EXTRADITION.

ZACK, BILLY, YOU'VE WON!

ALL RIGHT! WE ARE READY!

EUCLID, GET THEM WATER TRUCKS OUT OF HERE.

EVERYBODY, GET BEHIND THIS DIRT RAMP.

THE ROAD'S BLOCKED WITH TRUCKS.

I'M GOING AROUND.

GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!

GO! GO!

GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!

HOLD HIM THERE.

HOLD HIM.

NOW GET HIM!

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

DON'T BE NERVOUS, SQUEEZE THE TRIGGER.

BUT IF YOU MISS AGAIN, IT'S YOUR ASS!

KEEP GOING, SON.

WE DID IT! WE GOT HIM!

I'M HAPPY AS A PIG IN SHIT!

MAYBE YOU AIN'T A FAGGOT AFTER ALL.

ALL RIGHT. THE GAME IS OVER.

COME OUT AND SURRENDER.

NO! NO! NO!

DROP ON IT, SHERIFF.

GET DOWN, BOYS! DOWN!

THAT BETRAYS A NEGATIVE ATTITUDE, BILLY BOY.

BUT THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

WE GOT ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD

AND WE CAN WAIT.

[ GUNFIRE ]

FIRE AWAY, BILLY BOY.

WE GOT A LONG DAY AHEAD OF US.

JUST SIT THERE AND ENJOY THE AFTERNOON SUN.

[ HELICOPTER APPROACHING ]

MOVE THOSE PEOPLE BACK.

ISN'T THERE ANYTHING THEY CAN DO?

THEY'VE GOT NO ENGINE. THEY GOTTA BE PULLED OUT.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

STEALIN'.

WHEN IT GETS DARK,

YOU TWO GO OUT THROUGH THE HATCH

AND SLIP ACROSS THE LINE.

I WON'T LET YOU DIE.

I'M STAYING WITH YOU.

BILL...

SHERIFF.

IF I SURRENDER,

WILL YOU GET MEDICAL ATTENTION TO MY FATHER?

I HEAR YOU, BILLY.

YES, SIR. YOU GIVE UP NOW,

I'LL SEE YOUR DADDY GETS TO THE HOSPITAL.

YOU GOT SHERIFF BUELTON'S WORD.

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?

COVER ME.

SHOOT THAT HIPPIE!

LET THE GOVERNOR THROUGH.

GOOD OLD SON OF A BITCH!

GODDAMN!

PULL! EVERYBODY, PULL!

PULL! PULL IT! PULL!

PULL! PULL! PULL! PULL!

SHOOT INTO THAT CROWD!

YOU SHOOT, AND WE'LL TURN THIS INTO LITTLE BIG HORN.

STOP THEM OUT THERE!

COME ON!

GRAB THAT CABLE! HAUL THAT CABLE IN!

PULL! PULL!

COME ON, GOVERNOR! PULL!

WE'VE GOT TO TRY SOMETHING ELSE.

FOLLOW ME.

[ CHEERING ]

GET THOSE TABLES OUT OF THE WAY!

MOVE IT!

I GOT YOU, YOU SON OF A BITCH.

COME OUT OF THAT TANK OR I'LL BURN YOU OUT!

I'LL FRY YOU ALIVE! YOU HEAR ME?

I'LL POUR GASOLINE DOWN THAT HATCH,

'CAUSE YOU HAVE LOST, SERGEANT, AND I WON!

HOOK HER UP. HOOK HER UP!

WE STOPPED A SHERMAN TANK!

WE DIDN'T GET NO HELP FROM THE GOVERNOR, ARMY--

[ CROWD CHEERING ]

PULL! PULL!

I'M COMING, SHERIFF!

SHERIFF--

YOU SYPHILITIC BOLSHEVIK!

YOU PERVERT!

YOU PUSSY COMMUNIST!

PULL! PULL! COME ON!

PULL! PULL!

PULL! PULL! PULL! PULL!

YOU DID REAL GOOD, OLD GIRL.