Original subtitles

No. No, stay with me on this.

Her birthday is today,

but the surprise party isn't until Thursday.

Thursday? Why Thursday?

Parents' idea.

No way she'll expect it.

But the point is I gotta give her something today,

and I gotta give her something Thursday,

and I'm kind of broke.

And the pressure's really on, because the best present

should come from your boyfriend, right?

So you got her a sweater?

Hey, it's cashmere.

Tasteful, elegant, figure-flattering.

Cashmere? You said you didn't have any money.

Well, it's not real cashmere.

It's like, more like a faux cashmere.

So, what did you get her for Thursday?

So far, dinner at Salinger's.

I know. I know.

But I could get her one of those snow globe thingies.

She collects them. That's kind of classy, right?

Says "I know you." Cheap.

Happy birthday to me!

Wow!

- This is yours? - Yeah.

My parents gave it to me as a birthday, belated Christmas,

"we love you even if you're not our biological child" present! What do you think?

- Wow. - This is so cool.

A little guilt goes a long way. Hop in, you have to hear the stereo!

Okay.

Wow.

For me?

Uh, yeah.

It's from Julia.

Oh. Thanks. Yeah. Buckle up.

All right.

Tomorrow, sonnets.

Get a good night's sleep

and bring me your favorite adjective.

Hey, I have to watch Owen tonight,

but you should come over. We can do some homework.

Is that what we're calling it now?

Hey, Julia, can you hang out a bit?

Uh-huh.

Catch you later.

Hey, Mr. Peck.

What's up?

Well, my dear, I wanted to talk to you about

what you handed in yesterday.

I hate to say it, but

this one's not quite up to your usual.

It's not?

"Your touch is like a feather.

"Your touch is like an arrow.

"Your touch makes me feel alive."

And so on and so forth.

Um,

it doesn't feel real.

You know, maybe you should write about something that you know.

I do

know

about this.

Listen, if you want to write about a boy,

about a man touching you,

you gotta reach down in your soul,

make me feel like... Like I'm inside your body.

What's it like when... When he puts his hands on your skin?

And when you're kissing, what's going on?

What's going on in here?

In here?

I want the goods.

Okay.

Oh, hey.

Don't get so bummed out.

It's just an assignment.

♪ Everybody wants to live ♪

♪ Like they wanna live ♪

♪ And everybody wants to love ♪

♪ Like they wanna love ♪

♪ Everybody wants to be ♪

♪ Closer to free ♪

♪ Closer to free ♪

I will pay you.

I will write you a check.

Don't tell this story!

She's just getting into the music.

She's pumping her fists like this.

You should've seen it, Jason.

And then there's this poor fool standing next to her!

I loathe you.

Boom! She smashes him right in the eye.

Gave him a shiner, I swear to God.

Is that true?

Hey, Charlie, we were just...

You gave somebody a black eye?

Oh, not on purpose.

Um... So we've got this retirement party

coming in today for lunch, right?

You wanna do, like, one big table or...

It can wait.

So, what were you at? Some concert?

Um, Atlas over on...

Oh, I know Atlas.

Yeah, let me know the next time you get tickets.

Well, actually, we've got

an extra one for tonight.

Yeah?

Great.

You don't want to go with us.

I don't?

Hanging with the help. Wouldn't that be slumming?

Anyway, it'll probably run pretty late,

and you've got that

little boy at home?

Not a problem, unless you guys don't want me to go.

Oh, no. No, no.

We just didn't know you liked to do stuff like this.

Like what?

Go out and have fun?

Believe it or not, I do.

You are not gonna eat that.

Come on. Don't be a doof.

Just do what I do, okay?

Come on, fiddle girl, I dare you.

Jody, what are you doing?

This is so disgusting.

Excuse me. Oh, gross!

Um, excuse me, sir!

There's a dead roach in my ice cream.

You didn't buy that.

Yeah, well, she, uh... She...

No, duh! My mom did.

She's outside spewing in the dumpster.

You would be too if you just ate half a cockroach.

- I don't see anything. - Of course not.

We thought it was a... A nut

until we poked at it with a spoon,

and then it got all squished up in the sauce,

and... And see?

There's his little legs.

Look, I'll get you another one.

Make that two.

And dead bugs are not a topping.

Hey, you.

Hi.

You headed home?

Mm-hm.

Jump in. Elvis and I will give you a lift.

There, now you know my innermost secret.

I give silly names to my cars.

That's okay, it's nice out. I'm gonna...

It's nice out? You look like you're freezing.

You're practically turning blue.

- I'm okay. - What is this?

I offer up one criticism all semester. Now you hate me.

No, of course not. I just, um...

I just wanna walk.

Will you stop playing hard to get and get in the car?

Come on.

Julia.

They could've changed my birthday, too,

just like they changed my name.

Oh, well. At least I got a convertible out of it, right?

You really think they got you a car

because they feel guilty or something?

Yeah, of course they did. Why shouldn't they? They lied to me.

Wow. You're pretty mad about this.

No, no.

I don't know. I just figured if they wanna buy me stuff

to make themselves feel better, who am I to say no?

Oh, look! Earrings.

Hey, those are nice.

The red ones.

Those are garnets. My birthstone.

Did you know that?

Really?

I just thought they kind of looked like you.

And they're 300. Yikes.

Come on. There's a bookstore down the block.

Let's go browse.

You are so adorable!

Hinting around, trying to figure out

what to get me for my birthday.

Me? No!

No. I got that covered.

All set for, like, weeks.

Sort of.

Well, not really.

Okay, yes. I am hinting.

You're so totally sweet. You really wanna get these for me?

Well, yeah, I do, but I can't, so...

Yes, you can.

You can. I'll buy them, and you can give them to me.

What?

- That's not the same thing. - Sure, it is.

Look, you thought of getting them for me.

And it's the thought that counts, right? So why not?

'Cause they're way too expensive and...

Bailey, you've got a girlfriend with a Gold card.

Vodka doesn't stain, does it?

I know it doesn't smell.

Can't take you anywhere, huh?

No.

So this was fun.

Yeah. It's still pretty early.

Yeah, we were maybe gonna go back to Parker's.

You probably prefer sitting on actual furniture.

Actual furniture's a plus.

You know what, I got a whole house full.

Couch, side chairs,

not to mention hot and cold running food.

I don't know.

We wouldn't want you to go out of your way or anything.

How's it out of my way? It's my house.

Come on. It's just 10 minutes from here.

Sure. Why not?

You wanna hear something funny?

You.

You're, like, the last person in the world

I ever thought I'd be hanging out with.

The last?

How come?

When I first came to the restaurant

for the interview,

the agency told me I was meeting some Mr. Salinger.

I expected you to be 50.

And then I see this guy, you,

and I'm thinking, "No way."

But the thing is,

you acted like you were 50!

Get out of here. I did not.

Yeah, you did.

You had the whole "wife and kids" thing going on.

Fiancee.

Ex fiancee.

Oh.

Please. I'm trying to have a good time here.

Anyway, the whole interview totally freaked me out.

"What are your qualifications?

"We require exemplary references."

I must've been trying out my new

"Hey, I'm a grown-up" personality.

So now, is this your old

"I'm just a nice, normal, fun guy" personality?

Ha-ha. I guess it is.

I like it better.

You know, just in case you're taking a survey or anything.

Hey!

Ugh.

What time is it?

I knew poli-sci was dull, but...

I wasn't drooling, was I?

No.

Oh, man, it's late.

I should cut.

No.

Don't go yet.

No?

I, um... I don't wanna do this now.

No, really? Why not?

Huh?

Justin!

When I say no, that's what it means. No!

What's with you?

Nothing.

Julia? I'm...

No one else, okay? I mean it.

All right.

Today after school, Mr. Peck gave me a ride.

And...

I got in the car.

And he put his hand on my leg,

and he tried to kiss me.

What?

I mean, I got out of there. I left.

And...

Nothing happened.

Nothing happened.

What's the name of that Jane Siberry CD you taped for me?

What are you doing?

I'm labeling tapes.

Why aren't you ready for school?

I'm not going.

You're not going?

Is there an echo in here?

Jule...

Look, I don't wanna talk about it.

Listen to me.

Hey, hey, listen to me!

Look, you're gonna get ready right now.

You're gonna come with me.

We're gonna go to Principal Stickley's office.

And you're gonna tell her what happened with Mr. Peck.

I am not gonna make a thing about this.

Well, this is already a thing.

It's already a thing, or you wouldn't be sitting here

in your pajamas at 8:00 in the morning.

Look, I just don't feel like seeing him today, that's it.

Oh, and what about tomorrow?

You're gonna be late for first period.

- Julia... - Can you tell Sarah

to take good notes for me in Chem. Would you?

Oh!

Oh, I... Oh!

Shoot. I'm sorry.

I am sorry.

I'm sorry. I...

Klutz.

I know. I'm thinking about a 12-step program.

Listen, uh,

I had a great time last night.

It's been a while, you know, so thanks.

Does that mean if I asked you to do something tonight,

you'd say yes?

Odds are pretty much in your favor.

I've got this Christmas tree in my dorm room.

Thing's shedding like a dog in July.

Any chance of you helping me drag it to the recycle place?

My truck and I are at your service.

Great.

Oh, by the way...

don't serve those.

Right.

Is that the bimbo?

I don't know.

I'd have to hear her sing "La Bamba" to tell you for sure.

You want a cherry in that?

How about a shot of rum?

Jody.

Hey, it's just an idea.

Hey, you guys got any smokes back there?

- Yeah. - So get me a pack.

Come on, quick, while no one's looking.

Come on, Claud.

Do I have to do everything?

Darts Ultra-Lights okay with you?

You coming?

Justin. Good.

You wanna give me a hand here?

Oh, yeah, we had to change the number for the hotline.

Apparently it's one digit off from some Chinese takeout place.

We've been getting lots of orders for moo goo gai pan.

What?

You touch her again, your life's over.

Uh, why are we here?

We just need to pick up a few things.

We do? What kind of things?

Sweaters, for one.

Ew. Yellow is not your color.

Sweaters?

I don't need a sweater.

You will when we go skiing.

Look, my parents are making me go with them next weekend,

so I asked if I could invite you.

You're autumn, aren't you?

Green. Ooh, green is perfect.

They love the idea. Let's go look at skis.

Wait a minute. Sarah.

Sarah, slow down a second here.

I can't afford to go skiing.

Are you listening to me?

My parents said it was okay.

That means you don't have to afford anything.

We can ski all day, sit by the fire at night.

Drink hot cocoa. It'll be great.

It's... It's too much.

It's too much.

Bailey, did I tell you that the earrings

were my absolute favorite gift?

I've had, like, 15 compliments.

So now I wanna do something nice for you, okay?

Besides, it's gonna be pretty miserable if it's just me and my parents

walking around, pretending everything's okay when it isn't.

And I'm not sure I'm ready for that.

But if you come with me...

I pay for the cocoa?

Okay.

Let's try on some skis.

Do you know why I got called in?

'Cause if it's about missing classes...

Sorry. You're going to have to wait, though. She's got someone in there with her.

Ah.

I truly don't get it, Enid.

I mean, we've always had a terrific relationship.

She'd stay after class. We'd talk.

And I'd try to make her feel like I was a friend,

her not having a dad and all.

Maybe that was my mistake.

Maybe she misinterpreted that.

Oh, God.

Now that I think about it,

her work lately has been kind of sexually explicit.

I never thought it had anything to do with me.

I promise you,

we'll get to the bottom of this.

Maybe she's trying to make her boyfriend jealous. I don't know.

Julia.

Then... boom, right?

We're all headed down the slopes backwards.

That's when the guy takes the picture.

You're kidding!

No. I think I have a copy of it.

My mom saves all that stuff.

Sarah? Oh. Hi, Bailey.

Hey.

Oh, Sarah. We just got a call from American Express.

They thought maybe your card was stolen.

Stolen?

God, I hope not. I just used it.

They said there was a lot of unusual activity on the account.

Jewelry. Sporting goods.

It came to over $1000.

Oh. Yeah. Yeah, that was me.

I needed a few things for the trip.

Is that a problem?

It's just

a lot of money, sweetheart.

Well, why would you give me a charge card if you didn't want me to use it?

Well, don't you think this is

a little excessive?

Oh.

Oh, okay. I understand.

Um...

we could still take this stuff back.

Yeah, we can take the car back, too, if that's what you want.

Of course not.

I completely understand if you guys

don't want me to have this stuff.

It's not that, Sarah. It's just...

Well, try to be a little bit more careful. That's all.

Okay?

Sure.

Whatever.

I don't know, there's Comet,

uh, Blitzen,

Q-Tip? Cupid?

Oh, who cares? There's eight of them.

Don't make me laugh. This sucker's heavy.

Hey, when I get a tree, I get a tree.

I could have guessed that about you.

What does that mean? Watch your step.

Just means that you don't do anything halfway.

Okay. I can accept that.

- All right. - Okay.

One...

- Two... - Two...

- Three! - Ugh.

Ooh. Ha, ha!

All right.

Oh, Charlie.

No, no.

Sorry. Wrong answer.

Hey, come... Come on.

Why not?

Just because, okay?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

What? Who asked out who tonight?

I asked you to do a favor for me.

Oh, look, maybe you got the wrong idea or something,

but I, um...

I'm not interested in this with you.

I mean, I'm just... I'm not.

I mean, you're a nice guy and everything, but...

You know what? I got it.

You made your point.

I'm gonna go dump this.

Good night.

Do you know what you did?

Do you have any idea what you did?

Hey.

You just go to him. You don't tell me. You just...

I mean, who asked you to?

This was my problem, not yours,

and I didn't want anybody else to know,

and now people do.

I'm in my house, and I get...

Jule, Jule...

Okay, I do not know what you are talking about.

Stickley.

He went to her.

Wait. He went to her?

And... And what?

And he said that I was coming on to him.

He what?

You... But you set it straight, right?

I mean, you told her?

- Right? - No, okay? No, I didn't.

I don't know, I just...

I think that maybe it wasn't 100 percent his fault.

What, are you kidding?

I don't know.

I don't know.

Julia.

I-I don't get it.

I mean, I really...

Do you remember after the wedding?

After we, um...

I ran into Nina the next morning at the lockers,

and she just looked at me, and she knew.

I mean, she came right up to me, and she said,

"You're not a virgin anymore, are you?"

I didn't see anything different about me.

But she did.

What if I'm giving off some kind of signal?

Like what?

Sexual radar?

That's nuts. You know it.

Justin, it doesn't make any sense.

I mean, he has always been so supportive

and so great.

I mean, why would it happen now?

I mean, why all of a sudden?

The only thing that has changed is me.

Hey. Hey.

I, um, just wanted to take a pulse.

Are we cool?

We're cool, and you're 10 minutes late.

Listen, you ought to check out the schedule,

'cause I had to move a couple of things around.

Moved things around?

You cut half my hours.

Yeah, look, um, I'm sorry about that,

but I'm carrying too much help on this shift.

It's not like they're banging down the doors around here.

I can't make my tuition on this.

Are you, um... cutting Parker's hours

or Jason's?

Well, Shelly, you were the last person hired.

Mmm. And the first one that wouldn't go to bed with you.

Hey. That is out of line.

I'm still your boss.

God, it is so obvious.

I won't put out,

so now you're getting back at me.

No, see, that's not true.

'Cause if I was getting back at you,

I'd tell you that you're a lousy waitress

and that the only reason I've kept you

working here this long is for the babe value.

Oh, another minute and you would've missed me.

Come on in.

I won't keep you long.

You got my message?

I left it with your homeroom teacher.

You cut classes again today?

Please don't be upset with me.

I'm not upset with you, Julia.

I'm concerned.

You're one of my best students,

and Allen is one of my best teachers.

I keep thinking

maybe I haven't heard the whole story.

Is there anything you want to say to me today?

What can we do so that I never have to think about this again?

So that it goes away?

You understand that

once you say that, the matter is closed.

I'd appreciate it if you'd let me out of his class.

It's the middle of the term, I...

You'd have to take an incomplete.

That's fine. Whatever.

Julia, you know...

Please, Ms. Stickley.

I'm sorry.

Claudia?

Claudia, have you seen the checkbook?

Oops!

What the hell?

Rum?

Rum?

Out of there. Now!

I... I'm not so sure I can walk right now.

Out.

Stop yelling.

Out! Out.

You're yelling.

You are intensely good-looking. Do you know that?

First of all, I am calling your parents.

Oh. You know what?

My mom would love you.

Where's the john?

By the kitchen.

What the hell do you...

You... You are 12, okay?

You're 12!

You know what, Char?

I'm sure you got a lot to say about this, and...

Well, it'll probably take a while,

but before you get started,

I kind of gotta throw up.

Thanks for this.

This feels more like my birthday than my actual birthday did.

Do we get cake?

Of course you're getting cake.

Good, because the other night

when they brought out the cake with all the candles

and sang "Happy Birthday"

and told me to make a wish, I didn't.

Because it just didn't feel right.

So I decided to save it for tonight.

Great. That's great.

- I wore my earrings, see? - Yes.

I was hoping you'd wear your sweater,

but I guess you're probably saving it for the trip.

Actually,

I kind of took it back.

Oh.

You didn't like it?

Just...

It just feels kind of weird.

You know, you buying me all this stuff.

No, no. I told you I want to.

I know. I know that, and that's great.

But it's starting to feel like

part of you really wants to give me these things,

and the other part of you is just doing it

to get back at your parents.

Wow.

God, I had no idea I was dating Sigmund Freud.

Come on, Sarah, you heard what they said.

And I don't know what's going on with you guys. I don't.

But do I know you're spending too much.

And I shouldn't be spending their money

because I'm not really their daughter? Is that it?

God, Bailey, you sound just like them.

No, that is...

♪ Happy birthday to you... ♪

It's just, it feels like you're using me to punish them.

For lying to you, I guess, and...

- You can shut up now. - Sarah!

No, I get it, okay?

Excuse me.

I'm thinking maybe we should talk about this.

What's to talk about?

You've obviously got it all figured out.

Your car.

Oh, man.

Wow.

I'll go call the police.

Why? Why? It's not like they can do anything.

And it's not like I care about this stuff,

because it's just stuff.

So you're right.

You know, we should take it all back.

The earrings, the skis, the stupid car.

'Cause who really cares, right?

I mean, who gives a damn about any of it?

Maybe somebody will steal it.

- Taxi! - Sarah.

Sarah, wait a second!

Sarah!

Here you go.

Drink it.

What is it?

Bitters and soda.

Pass.

Now!

I think I better move closer to the bathroom.

What were you thinking about, Claud? Huh?

Can you tell me that?

I don't know, I just...

I guess it just seemed kind of funny and...

I mean, why do you do it?

I don't have to answer that. I'm twice as old as you are.

But don't you do it for fun?

That's different.

Why?

'Cause I'm twice as old as you are. That's why.

And I'm not the one in trouble here.

You are not drinking again until you're 21.

Okay, okay, okay.

This Jody friend of yours.

She's... She's a juvenile delinquent, and I...

Charlie, she's my friend.

This girl is trouble.

You're not hanging out with her anymore. Do you understand me?

Do you?

Okay.

I won't.

Oh, man.

Just shoot me in the head.

Where did you go?

Nowhere.

I just kind of had the cab driver drive me up and down Lombard Street over and over.

He thought I was crazy,

but I used to love that when I was little.

There was a party?

Surprise. Seventy-five people.

They left about a half-hour ago.

You mean you...

Your folks put it together.

Been driving me kind of nuts about it, but

I guess they just wanted everything to be perfect.

It's just guilt, Bailey.

I don't think so.

I was just upstairs with them, and...

I definitely don't think it's guilt.

I kind of get the feeling that...

That it might actually be love.

Big time.

They're not my real parents, Bailey.

That is so weird.

You know, it's not like they have an obligation to love me or anything.

Maybe not,

but they did make this, like, huge,

huge choice a few years ago

to love you.

And so you don't have to...

You don't have to test them.

You don't have to see how much you can get away with,

and you don't have to make them prove they love you every day,

because they've already been doing that

for, like, the past 16 years.

They're always gonna love you, Sarah.

I mean, come on.

How could they possibly not love you?

I don't get it.

Why didn't you say something?

This teacher makes a pass at you, and you don't even say anything?

Please Charlie, can you just sign it and let me drop the class?

- Then what? Then he wins. - Okay.

Fine, he wins.

Are you gonna sign it or not?

I don't know. I have to think about it.

Well, get back to me when you've made up your mind.

Why are you letting some creep get away with this?

Because maybe it was my fault.

Something I did

or said or wore.

I mean, maybe I caused this.

You throwing yourself at a teacher?

No way in hell.

It... It's not who you are.

Then why?

Probably he's one of those jerks

who sees a pretty girl and thinks, "I'm entitled,"

you know?

"That's for me."

Never mind what the girl thinks or wants.

I know plenty of those guys.

And the fact that he's, what, twice your age?

More?

And he's got that authority thing going on.

He knows he can hold stuff over you.

That just makes it so much worse.

Trying to...

Trying to take advantage of...

Of someone like that. It's just...

Guys do that sometimes. We just...

It's such a lousy thing to do.

Such a lousy thing to do to you.

Yeah.

Do you want me to go up to school, talk to anybody?

Mm-mm. No.

Want me to beat him up?

I'm your big brother.

It's in the job description.

This is "Geo" pardy.

Geography meets Jeopardy.

Well, Claudia, are you feeling all right?

I'm feeling kind of ragged.

I, uh...

I have this note from my brother.

Well, you wanna go see the school nurse?

I'm thinking that might be a good idea.

Let's blow this funeral parlor.

Got any smokes?

Man, I'm jonesin'.

You crack me up.

Hey.

Hey.

I, uh...

I brought your last check.

Um, actually, I hope that it won't be your last check.

I'd like you to come back to work. Full-time, you name it.

I know that I was horrible to you

and that I owe you this huge apology.

Yeah, I was definitely attracted,

but you said no, and that should've been it.

I couldn't even tell you why I went off on you.

Who are you so mad at?

What?

It's in your eyes. You're like this

angry guy.

- I'm not. - Yeah.

Yeah, you are.

Come on, I can't be the first girl

that's ever said no to you.

I mean, big deal, but you just...

It's no excuse.

There's... There's no excuse for the way you treated me.

See, it has magic repellent powers.

Oh. Hmm.

Yeah, and if anybody comes near you who's creepy or weird,

it'll zap them with invisible shock rays.

- I'm dead serious. - You're crazy.

It will.

Justin, um,

I'm gonna...

Unfinished business.

Okay.

I don't know what's worse.

What you did to me

or that you lied about it, or that you made me doubt myself.

I don't think this is such a good idea,

under the circumstances, your being here.

You're worried.

You should be.

Maybe you thought that I was just gonna go away.

I thought that, too, but I'm not.

I'm gonna go talk to Ms. Stickley, and

I'm not gonna let you get away with what you did to me.

Julia, I don't know what you think happened, but...

Do you have any idea how much I loved it here, in your class?

I mean, this stupid, ugly room

was one of my favorite places.

Ever.

But you ruined that.

Because the truth is, there really isn't anything that I would want to learn from you anymore.

Hi, I can't come to the phone right now,

but I wanna talk to you.

Please leave a message after the beep.

Hi.

Uh...

God.

Um, I wasn't gonna...

I kind of just wanted to hear your voice on the machine,

and, uh... I forgot to hang up.

Um...

I hope you're okay.

I'm, uh...

I'm kind of a mess, if that makes you feel any better.

I'm sorry.

This is, uh...

I shouldn't have...

Okay.

Okay, okay. It's right over here.

Careful.

Oh!

Okay.

Where are we going?

Right over here.

Okay. Close your eyes.

- Right over here. - Okay.

Okay. Open your eyes.

Happy belated birthday.

Wow.

Well, it's beautiful,

but I don't get it.

Look straight up.

No, no, wait.

Wait a second.

Here, this way.

It's right between...

Gemini and Orion.

What am I looking for?

Your star.

My what?

It's my birthday gift to you.

I sent in this form and everything.

And I mean, it's not the most expensive

birthday gift in the world, but, anyway,

there's this star up there

named Sarah.

And that's not gonna change,

and that's not gonna go away

'cause I have a certificate.

So...

no matter what happens,

it's gonna be there for, like, millions and millions of years.

Right up there.

You can't see it, but it's there.

I promise.

Wow.

Wow.

Go ahead.

You never got to make your wish.

Okay.