Original subtitles

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Ah...

So, Ron...

you're just going to chill all summer?

Chillin', as you put it, is for amateurs, Kim.

I'm marinating.

Marinating?

Marinating... relaxation for the professional.

Ready to roll, Kimmie?

Roll? No one said anything about rolling.

A road trip to visit my Uncle Slim.

Okay. I'll be here when you get back.

In Montana.

Montana?

Okay, well, I'll be here when you get back.

Long time since we visited the Old Lazy C Ranch.

Lazy?

I'm simpatico with lazy.

Well, my mom has to work.

You want to come with?

Oh, let me consult my marination advisor.

Up for Montana, buddy?

Yee-haw!

Okay, let's get lazy.

Here you go, Ronald.

Toss these in the car.

This does not bode well for the Ronster.

Oh!

Bill, bill, bill...

What is this?

That's for me.

Hmm! Hmm...

"Dear Mr. Drakken..."

It's Dr. Drakken, you dolts!

"Thank you for your application..."

Da da da de de...

Oh, blast!

Rejected again.

( Grunting )

Shego!

"Cerebellum, Ultra-smart, Super-Genius Thinking Society"?

Are you kidding me?

Whoa, whoa... and they won't let you join?

No! And it vexes me to the bone.

They have fun singles mixers and fabulous cruises to nowhere.

And the newsletter has the most fiendishly clever word jumbles.

Oh, come on. Why do you want to join some super dorky club?

To prove that I am brillianter than a lot of them.

Brillianter?

Most smartest, whatever.

I'm a scientific genius, not an Englist.

Linguist.

Stop that.

I need to invent something so brilliant,

so irrefutably mind-bogglingly wowful...

So close.

That no one can deny me my place

at the head of the genius table.

If you sat at the doofus table, you'd have a lock.

Doofus table... Shego!

Wait... that's it!

What's it?

Ow... ooh...

The answer is not to build myself up.

It's to knock the competition down.

Ooh, ooh, ooh, stupid-idea alert.

Precisely, Shego.

Okay, kids, we're here.

The Lazy C.

Well, the lazy me should fit right in.

Oh, yeah!

Ron, Uncle Slim's ranch is a working ranch.

What? I thought it was a dude ranch.

You know, for dudes like me.

Giddyup, Dad!

We want to start roping and riding!

Hey, squirt.

Come on, Slim.

Don't call me that in front of the kids.

( Iaughing )

Squirt. Squirt.

Where's my favorite sister-in-law?

She got stuck working a double shift at the hospital,

so we brought Ronald instead.

Howdy, partner.

Howdy!

How'd your prairie dog lose his hair?

( Angry grunt )

Feisty little fella.

Where's Jos?

She emailed me right before the trip

about some big surprise.

Well, Jos is going through a phase.

What kind of phase?

She's got herself a hero that she absolutely idolizes.

Ah, it's great to have heroes.

For me, it was Vlad Lukavich

of Hydraulic Servo Actuator fame.

Man, could that guy build spacecraft.

I used to write to him when I was Jos's age.

Never wrote back.

So, who's Jos's Vlad Lukavich?

I can do anything!

( Gasps )

Your daughter.

'Cause I'm just like you, Kim.

Uh... wow.

Oh, yeah.

Can I mosey or what?

( Screams )

Are you afraid of horses?

Me, afraid?

( Panting )

Yes.

It's not a real horse.

It's just a robot.

That's the kind of horse he fears most of all.

It was ten years ago

out in front of Smarty Mart.

( Screaming )

I lost two baby teeth that day.

Changes a guy.

Ron, you've got to get past this.

Yeah, just be like Kim.

She's not afraid of nothing.

Kid, if being like Kim was that easy,

I would have done it a long time ago.

You can try.

Fine.

Nice robot horse.

Nice robot.

( Whinnying )

( screaming )

Sorry about that.

Old Tornado still has some glitches in his get-along.

Outstanding work, Slim.

Is he cybertronic?

Yep.

Runs on a solar-powered,

self-perpetuating power core.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. You know, that's exactly

what I said to Rufus, right?

Oh, yeah.

( Chattering )

Hey, Squirt, you want to hit the general store with me?

Got to get some supplies. Sure.

You boys behave while I'm gone.

Whatever you say...

Squirt.

Kimmie, you're in charge.

Okay, Dad.

Come on.

I got all kinds of stuff I want to show you.

Uh, cool.

Where'd they move them habaneros to?

If you're fixing to rustle us up

some of your famous five-alarm chow,

I'm gonna be one happy camper.

Ain't no campers out in these parts.

Uh, right. Buckaroos.

Squirt, you're the best brother

a fella could ever have,

but you are a tinhorn.

Bad as them other fellas they've been bringing in.

What other fellas?

Possible? Hamish.

I was wondering when we'd see your sorry self here.

I, of course, am being jocular when I say "sorry self."

Gotcha. This is my big brother, Slim Possible. Howdy.

Hold up there, Hamish.

Why did you expect me?

For the Wild West Science Fest, of course.

Are your partners ready?

Uh, I'm in the dark here.

Some meeting of the minds

they're having over at the Crooked D.

Only the greatest scientific minds

from around the world were invited.

I wasn't invited.

Ooh... my bad.

Well, we'd better be getting back

to the other super geniuses.

Um... toodles.

Ooh! What happened to Squirt, the happy camper?

Oh-oh, it's... it's no big deal.

I'd rather spend my time with you

than... than a bunch of tinhorns, really.

Yee-haw!

Just wish I knew why I didn't make the cut.

Are they all here?

Yes, all the Poindexters on your list are here.

So, now what?

Prepare yourself, Shego,

for soon, the so-called geniuses will be yesterday's news.

I, Dr. Drakken,

will be the most brilliant scientific mind on the planet!

Yeah. You know what?

I'm gonna go ahead and put this plan

in the failed column right now.

( Grumbling )

Jos...

I don't know what to say.

Uh, the word "obsession" comes to mind.

Isn't it spanking?

Totally.

I'm... I'm flattered.

You're a little light on the sidekick here, Jos.

I'd say Wade is a lot more than a sidekick, Mister.

He runs Kim's Web site, builds all them gadgets.

He keeps the whole operation running.

I'm talking about me.

Who?

The sidekick. Huh?

Usually acts in a support/distraction role.

Not ringing any bells.

Ron Stoppable.

Never heard of you.

But you must be awfully proud to be a friend of my cousin's.

Oh, you probably don't recognize me without my

trusty naked mole rat. Ta-dah!

Rufus!

Now it's coming back to you.

I know everything about every one of Kim's adventures,

so I know how many times you saved the day.

I'm always right there.

The guy with the pocket that Rufus comes out of.

Uh, oh, yeah.

You're the one who's always losing his drawers.

Oh, come on. It's only been six or eight times.

Sent a little bird up a couple of years ago,

so I got an eye on the whole spread.

Oh, satellite, huh?

So, I guess you could take a look at the, uh...

Crooked D?

Yeah. You know,

where all those tinhorn brainiacs are.

You know, Squirt, I'm pretty handy

with the cutting-edge tech myself,

but I'm nowhere near as smart as you.

Now, Slim, I'm... I'm not that smart.

Of course you are and you know it.

Doesn't matter who else knows it.

I'd just like to know who put together that guest list.

DR. DRAKKEN: Ladies and gentlemen, you may now put on your hats

and become official buckaroos and buckarettes.

Yippee-kai-yay!

My own ten-liter hat.

I'm most eager to rope them up and ride them out.

( High-pitched crackling )

? The farmer in the dell, the farmer in the dell ?

? Hi-ho the derry-o, the farmer in the dell. ?

I love these cowboy songs.

( Whooping, country music playing )

Wow, they're acting so... so...

Silly?

Not the word I would choose, but okay.

It's because they are wearing my new invention,

the silly hat.

( Singing gibberish )

Anyone who wears one of these hats will act as silly as...

Your outfit?

I happen to feel muy macho, thank you very much.

Anyway, with the world's most brilliant people incapacitated...

You start looking pretty smart.

I will be the greatest mind on the planet

because the rest will be reduced to babbling buffoons.

( Iaughing uncontrollably )

KIM: Well, I hate to brag,

but it was pretty exciting

that time Drakken had a giant laser drill.

Inside the world's largest cheese drill,

which was not a cheese-cutter building.

It was actually made of cheese.

Yeah, that time.

You know all about that mission, huh?

Hey! Here I am, see,

when we busted Duff Killagan in Tokyo.

That's me, in the background there, see?

Huh, no.

Sorry.

Wh... Oh, you're right.

Yeah, it's a Japanese schoolgirl.

Here's one I usually don't talk about,

but since you're such a fan...

There was this top-secret thing called the Centurion Project...

Which Drakken and Killagan wanted, but it got stuck on you

and whenever you lied, the Centurion Battler

would grow and spread all over your body.

Boy, howdy.

I bet that's a Halloween nobody in Middleton will ever forget.

Was that Halloween?

I thought that was our big Groundhog's Day adventure.

How about when Shego...

Tutored Se�or Senior, Jr.

On how to be a bad guy?

Or when Drakken...

Stole a weather machine?

Uh, you know what?

Let's forget about me for a minute.

Let's talk about you.

Sure. What are you into?

You.

O... kay.

I'm going to mosey somewhere else.

Later.

Let's go outside and do something.

You got it!

Here's an idea.

Why don't you decide what we do?

I have got a great idea.

Excellent. What do you want to do?

Whatever you want to do.

Oh...

Just a few adjustments

to the satellite surveillance system and...

Whatcha doing, Mr. Doctor P.?

Um, uh, not spying on the Wild West.

Science Fest, I can tell you that.

Hey, isn't that your old pal,

Professor Ramish?

It is.

That is one strange square dance.

I bet it's a square-root dance.

Which is, what?

I don't know, but it's the sort of thing

the smartest people in the world would do

if they all got together.

I don't care if I wasn't invited,

I'm going over to the Crooked D.

Count me in. It's gotta be better than hanging out

with the Never-Heard of-Ron Fan Club.

I mean, I know Dr. Drakken is your archfoe,

but it seems to me, Shego's the really dangerous one.

I mean, if she put her mind to do it,

she could be the toughest villain out there.

Don't you think? Kim?

Kim?

Kim!!

Wade?

Hey, Kim. Please tell me

that someone, somewhere

needs me to do something.

What's the static?

My little cousin is my number one fan.

Aw, how sweet.

Well, at first,

but I can't take it anymore.

She won't leave me alone.

That's the price of fame.

You won't believe what it's like for me

when I go to the computer store.

I wonder where she could have got to.

KIM: I'm serious, Wade.

She's so got to get a life.

Preferably her own.

( Gasps )

Oh, no.

She heard you?

( Door slams )

She so heard me.

( Whooping )

Something's not right.

They're acting like a bunch of goofs.

Dr. P., sometimes you have

to let your hair down.

You got to get loose.

( Raspberries )

( idiotic giggling )

You know what?

Maybe some boundaries

are being crossed here.

What is wrong with you, man?

( Slurping )

What's going on down there?

Looks like trouble.

Better report it fast.

Hombre One to Drakken.

We have varmints.

DRAKKEN: We have what?

Varmints? What is a varmint?

Shego! Here... you speak Hombre.

Give me that.

Howdy, Hombre.

What in tarnation is a-goin' on?

Looks like we got us some varmints.

What does that mean?!

Hey. Um... I'm sorry.

I mean, it-it was so nice that you picked me

to be your hero, and I end up

being a total jerk.

It's not your fault.

It is. It really is.

I mean, well, you're...

Just a nobody,

stuck here in the middle of nowhere.

Jos, I was just a nobody.

I mean, not a nobody.

Nobody's a nobody.

Everybody's somebody. Right?

Is this supposed to make me feel better?

I'm just a regular person.

I'm into cheerleading and boys... sometimes.

You know, regular stuff.

You do incredible stuff.

You save the world.

Jos, I'm just, you know, me.

That's all I ever try to be,

and it turned out that sometimes being me

is enough to save the world.

Yeah, and that's why being you is so cool.

Try being you... It'll be even cooler.

Doubt it.

Kim, you'd best get down here!

BOTH: What's the sitch?

Oops. Sorry.

No big.

Ron and Dad?

Captured by Shego.

That means your archfoe is next door.

Spankin'!

Jos, it is not spankin'. It's serious.

But nothing ever happens around here.

This is major!

That's what I'm afraid of.

So!

We've got a new team here.

The genius and the lackwit.

Don't let him call you a lackwit.

Whatever your evil scheme is, Lipsky, it won't work.

Uh-huh, but it already has,

and all prisoners will refer to me as Dr. Drakken.

You'll always just be Drew Lipsky,

the science student who couldn't make the grade.

I will now.

You see, Possible,

I've adjusted the curve.

You gathered the greatest minds on the planet here,

so you could alter their intelligence

and make yourself seem smarter.

Aha!

How's he doing that?

That's for me to know and you to find out.

It's obviously those cowboy hats.

They probably contain some hidden circuitry

that alters brain wave efficacy.

You Possibles take the fun out of everything.

Yeah, well, it runs in the family.

There's a Possible posse heading into town.

( Horses whinnying )

Looks like they're expecting us.

Oh, that's a passel of hombres.

Can we take them?

Got to remember, Jos...

BOTH: Anything's possible for a Possible.

Let's ride.

( Whistles )

( whinnying )

Hick-a-bick-a-boo!

Yee-haw!

You know what's nice about robot horses, partner?

Magna hooves.

Oh!

( Grunts )

( growls )

( whinnies )

( grunts )

( growls )

Hang on, Jos.

I'll bust out Dad and Ron.

( Whinnies )

So not the drama. Oh!

Thanks, kid.

Couldn't have done it better myself.

Oh, this is all my fault.

Well, little darling,

now, you can't just go imitating

everything you see Cousin Kim doing.

Don't blame yourself, Jos.

It's my fault for being such a nosy Parker.

Dad.

Kim, the man is a nosy Parker.

Ron. Fear not.

We've got this escape in the pocket.

Gotcha.

( Groans ) Rufus.

Kangaroo rat.

He did it!

( Alarm blaring )

( all groan )

( alarm stops )

You actually fell for the old

key-near-the-cell-door ruse?

And you're not even wearing the silly hats.

Good hustle anyway, buddy.

I just want to know one thing

about your evil plan, Lipsky.

Well, I do like to gloat about the nuances of my schemes.

Fire away.

If you gathered

the greatest minds on the planet,

why did you leave me out?

Because you're a Possible.

You people are such pests!

Yep. (beeping)

What was that?

What? That boop, boop.

Oh, that. 'Tweren't nothing.

That was just me activating Old Tornado.

Is that all?

Well, never mind that... Wait.

Who is Old Tornado?

( Whinnies )

That's my big brother.

Good horsey.

What's he doing?

( Panicked yelling )

See, the little pony outside Smarty Mart

could never do that.

Yep, Old Tornado

is one of a kind.

Come on. Let's get Drakken.

Oh, I'll take that.

Whoa!

Hang on, Ron.

( Ron yelling )

Horsey, come back!

This is good-time fun.

Give me the remote, Shego.

I don't think so, and if you come any closer,

your sidekick gets bucked into the next county.

Can you do anything?

Nope. Afraid of that.

Now! Now!

What? I...

( straining )

No fair.

( Ron yelling )

Uh-uh-uh.

Oh, no.

That's original.

Whoa!

That was radical.

Thanks. Just doing the Jos thing.

Whoa-whoa, whoa, whoa.

( Whinny halts )

Huh?

Huh? I'll take that.

What did you say to it?

Oh, nothing. I just knew there was

an off switch back here.

See? I couldn't have done that.

Dr. D.,

I'd say it's about time to vamoose.

We need something big to cover our escape.

I've got it!

Stampede!

( Gibbering )

No, seriously, fellows.

A stampede would be very helpful here.

Allow me.

Huh. That there is dang weird.

Dad!

Possible?

What's this all about?

Silly hat.

( High-pitched crackling )

Well, Squirt, did you

work up an appetite?

Yes, I am hankering for some grub,

I'll tell you what.

Maybe you're not such a tinhorn after all.

Hey, where's Jos?

Haven't seen her in a while.

Me neither.

She was bending Ronald's ear

about something.

Are you guys ready to eat?

Oh, boy.

Kim, I just figured out

who the real hero is around here.

Ron? Totally.

It's hard to argue.

Ron here is afraid of practically everything.

But does he let his fears keep him from sidekicking?

I do not.

Attaboy.

Let's face it, Kim,

you can do anything,

so facing all those dangers and villains,

well, it's just like you say... no big.

Well, uh, I guess.

A fellow filled with that much fear

always charging into action with you?

Seems to me that's a true hero.

I can tell she's a Possible.

Mm-hmm! Smart as a whip, this kid.

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