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LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Okay, let's do this, peeps.
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00:00:03,170 --> 00:00:04,300
After breakups and make-ups, Jane the Virgin
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00:00:04,305 --> 00:00:06,335
finally got engaged to Michael.
4
00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:08,710
Will you marry me? Marry me!
Yes! Yes!
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00:00:08,709 --> 00:00:12,509
And her baby daddy Rafael, well, he said he'd try
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00:00:12,513 --> 00:00:15,513
to accept it, maybe because he had other things on his mind.
7
00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:18,416
See, his ex-wife Petra just gave birth to twins.
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Elsa and Anna.
Like in Frozen?
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No one except for you
would think of that.
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00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:23,516
Oh, and he recently learned
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00:00:23,524 --> 00:00:25,024
his mother was a crime lord.
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00:00:25,026 --> 00:00:26,786
I know, cray-cray, right?
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00:00:26,794 --> 00:00:28,464
Even crazier, he was working with Michael
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00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:30,602
to find his long-lost brother.
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Derek Ruvelle, son of Rafael's
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00:00:32,133 --> 00:00:33,603
mother Elena Di Nola.
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00:00:33,601 --> 00:00:35,071
Our buddy Derek
disappeared the day after
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00:00:35,069 --> 00:00:36,799
Mutter's identity
was discovered.
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00:00:36,804 --> 00:00:38,804
I know, straight out of a telenovela, right?
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00:00:38,806 --> 00:00:41,406
Well, imagine this-- Jane's father,
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00:00:41,409 --> 00:00:44,279
international telenovela star Rogelio de la Vega
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00:00:44,278 --> 00:00:46,078
was kidnapped by his biggest fan.
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00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:48,810
And even worse, he's in a fight with his family.
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I just think I need
some space right now.
25
00:00:51,152 --> 00:00:52,552
So they aren't even that worried!
26
00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,353
Such bad luck, right?
27
00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:56,285
And speaking of, Alba
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00:00:56,290 --> 00:00:57,720
had been corresponding with her first lover,
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00:00:57,725 --> 00:01:00,755
the notorious Pablo Alonso Segura.
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00:01:00,761 --> 00:01:02,731
And Xo invited him for a visit.
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And I got to say I really hope that's not true, don't you?
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Breaking news--
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our Jane Gloriana Villanueva always had strong opinions.
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I'm embarrassed
to be from Florida.
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00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:21,180
About politics.
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Too revealing-- change!
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Her mother's wardrobe.
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Jane, no!
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And her grandmother's superstitions.
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Stop, that's ridiculous.
Ay!
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And I don't want to mistake correlation for causation,
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but here we are today.
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Six weeks away from our Janemarrying the man of her dreams.
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I'm working on it.
I'm working on it.
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I know what you're thinking.
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That we've been here before, right?
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But this time was different.
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This time there were no reservations.
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00:02:01,755 --> 00:02:03,785
Did you make the reservations
for the chair rentals?
50
00:02:03,791 --> 00:02:05,461
No, I'm finalizing
the head count.
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00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:07,529
Michael's brother's a no,
so that's 25.
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00:02:07,528 --> 00:02:09,728
No, 26-- both his parents
are driving down.
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00:02:09,730 --> 00:02:13,270
Seriously? Aren't they, like,
archenemies or something?
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Well, they're not in a comic
book, but yes, basically.
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They haven't been
in the same room
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since Michael's
high school graduation.
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00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:20,769
He's freaking out.
Well, you never know.
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00:02:20,774 --> 00:02:22,914
I mean, engagements
bring people together.
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Michael's parents,
Alba and Pablo.
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00:02:28,549 --> 00:02:32,219
Ah, yes, Pablo Alonso Segura.
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The man,
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the myth, the legend.
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00:02:35,523 --> 00:02:37,223
Abuela, you're gonna have to,
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00:02:37,224 --> 00:02:40,694
because he's traveling
from Venezuela.
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00:02:43,531 --> 00:02:45,261
You're being ridiculous.
Now, back to the list.
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00:02:45,266 --> 00:02:47,796
The only question mark
is... Dad.
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00:02:47,801 --> 00:02:49,301
He still hasn't
gotten back to you?
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No.
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I'm calling him again.
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(phone autodials)
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LOLA:
Hello?
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Hey, Paola.
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Just trying to get in touch
with my dad.
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I'm sorry, Jane.
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He just stepped into a meeting
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with a very important
casting director.
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He'll be tied up for a while.
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00:03:07,388 --> 00:03:09,688
(sighs)
Have him call me back.
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Tell him that it's important.
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You know what?
Tell him
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I'm marrying Michael.
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You got it. I'll
give him that message.
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(beep)
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If you don't call...
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she'll know something's wrong.
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00:03:23,671 --> 00:03:24,771
No!
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You can't call!
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Stop arguing with me!
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You'll say good-bye
to them tonight...
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...when we livestream
our murder-suicide.
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00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,346
Okay, if he doesn't respond,
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00:03:37,351 --> 00:03:38,521
then there's something
definitely wrong.
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00:03:38,519 --> 00:03:39,619
Something is definitely wrong.
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00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:40,720
God, this is frustrating!
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00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:43,561
Thank you for taking Mateo.
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00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:47,227
I should go-- I don't want
to be late for my new advisor.
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Stop. She's gonna love you.
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I got to be frank-- last thing
I wanted is another advisee.
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00:04:00,341 --> 00:04:02,411
I hear you.
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00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:04,339
A-And I'm sorry
to be adding to your schedule.
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00:04:04,345 --> 00:04:05,835
Yeah, and apparently,
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00:04:05,846 --> 00:04:08,746
you wanted a new advisor
because of some complications
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00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,479
with your old one?
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00:04:10,484 --> 00:04:11,784
That's one way to put it.
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00:04:15,456 --> 00:04:16,986
Well, life is complicated.
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B-But it's all material, right?
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That's the cliché.
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00:04:20,728 --> 00:04:22,458
So, what do you write?
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Well, uh, my genre is romance.
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(quietly):
Barf.
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00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:27,733
Did she just say...
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Ex-Excuse me, what was that?
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I said "barf."
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ReEncoded By Dr.XJ | PSA
www.PSArips.com
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So, you're not a fan of romance.
Good to know. (chuckles)
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But I do hope
you keep an open mind.
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My mind is always open.
Well, I was...
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Careful, Jane, you're running out
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00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:54,433
of English Department faculty members.
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Just as long as it passes
the Bechdel test, okay?
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00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:57,363
Got it. Yes.
You've heard of it?
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No. No, I haven't.
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00:04:58,365 --> 00:04:59,825
It's a three-part question.
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Does the work feature
two female characters...
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00:05:02,703 --> 00:05:04,703
with names...
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00:05:04,705 --> 00:05:07,905
who talk about something
other than a man?
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00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:09,638
Like, for instance,
you, Jane,
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00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:11,483
talking to me,
Professor Donaldson,
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00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:13,678
about the work--
that passes the test.
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00:05:14,848 --> 00:05:17,718
But you, Jane,
talking to me, Marlene,
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about your former advisor,
Jonathan Chavez--
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that doesn't pass the test.
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Oh, yeah, well...
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00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:27,492
I mean, m-my work
certainly passes the test.
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00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:29,534
Translation: Jane will certainly check
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to make sure her work passes the test.
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00:05:31,598 --> 00:05:34,068
(laughs):
Great! Because otherwise...
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barf.
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00:05:39,473 --> 00:05:40,813
Just a little spit-up.
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00:05:40,808 --> 00:05:42,338
You're okay, Anna.
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00:05:42,343 --> 00:05:43,943
(Elsa crying)
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00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:46,914
Hey, Petra,
can you...?
Sure.
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00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:50,054
(electronic ding)
No, no, no, I meant
can you just pick her up?
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00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:51,920
Oh, no, it's fine.
I needed water.
145
00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:54,349
Hi. Elsa's
crying again.
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00:05:54,355 --> 00:05:56,615
And, um, I needed water,
room temperature.
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00:05:56,623 --> 00:05:59,393
Again, that's not
what the button is for.
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00:05:59,393 --> 00:06:01,693
But anyway,
I have some good news.
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00:06:01,695 --> 00:06:04,425
Dr. Grove says you're
getting out today.
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00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:06,449
What?
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00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:06,999
I-I thought I, um,
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00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,030
I needed to stay longer
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00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:09,495
because of my platelet problem.
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00:06:09,503 --> 00:06:11,573
Things look better.
You're good to go.
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00:06:11,572 --> 00:06:12,902
The babies, too?
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00:06:12,906 --> 00:06:15,036
Yes. The babies, too.
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00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:17,512
Petra...
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00:06:17,511 --> 00:06:19,041
don't worry, we can do this.
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00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:21,006
JANE:
It's gonna be okay.
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00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:22,684
Michael, I promise.
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00:06:22,683 --> 00:06:24,983
(sighs): Oh, I don't know.
The last time my parents
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00:06:24,985 --> 00:06:26,585
were together,
it was a disaster.
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00:06:26,587 --> 00:06:28,847
There was fighting,
finger-pointing, tears--
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mostly mine, but still...
(laughs)
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00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:32,887
Come on, they are not gonna
do that in front of me.
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00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:35,133
That's because
the only thing
they can agree on
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00:06:35,129 --> 00:06:37,659
is how much they love you.
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00:06:37,664 --> 00:06:38,934
Which is why you
can't leave the room.
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00:06:38,932 --> 00:06:40,532
I won't leave.
No, I'm serious.
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00:06:40,534 --> 00:06:41,704
Not even to go
to the bathroom.
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00:06:41,702 --> 00:06:43,052
Well, I might have
to go to the bathroom.
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00:06:43,053 --> 00:06:44,403
Remember that astronaut
that put the diaper on?
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Stop it. (laughs)
Where's your commitment?
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00:06:46,173 --> 00:06:49,513
No, I'm serious.
Oh.
(doorbell rings)
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Hi, Mom.
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00:06:51,478 --> 00:06:52,908
Hi, Dad.
Hey.
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00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:54,713
Hi!
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00:06:54,715 --> 00:06:55,805
Oh, Jane. Hi.
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00:06:56,784 --> 00:06:58,524
I didn't realize
you'd be here.
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00:06:58,519 --> 00:07:00,189
Oh. W-Well, I wanted to see you.
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00:07:00,187 --> 00:07:01,587
Come on in.
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00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:04,658
Mike, we were
hoping for a...
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00:07:04,658 --> 00:07:06,658
private moment alone.
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00:07:07,728 --> 00:07:10,428
We have some
important family business
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00:07:10,431 --> 00:07:11,831
we want
to discuss.
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00:07:11,832 --> 00:07:13,802
Oh. Well, it's just Jane.
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00:07:13,801 --> 00:07:16,101
I'm just gonna tell her
whatever you say anyway.
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MRS. CORDERO:
Fine.
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00:07:17,671 --> 00:07:19,101
We think you're
making a mistake.
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00:07:19,106 --> 00:07:20,706
Don't marry her.
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00:07:20,707 --> 00:07:21,637
Barf.
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00:07:27,648 --> 00:07:30,548
You... you don't want
Michael to marry me?
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00:07:30,551 --> 00:07:32,681
You were heartbroken, Mikey.
Don't you remember?
194
00:07:32,686 --> 00:07:34,846
When we found out the two
of you were back together,
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00:07:34,855 --> 00:07:37,115
I called your father.
We got to talking.
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00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:39,094
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
At least Jane's still bringing them together.
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00:07:39,092 --> 00:07:41,232
We wanted to reach out, but
then the next thing we knew,
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00:07:41,228 --> 00:07:43,698
we were getting an evite
to an engagement party.
199
00:07:43,697 --> 00:07:46,057
That's enough.
That's enough.
Michael... it's okay.
200
00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:47,866
You guys should talk.
201
00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:50,168
Um... I'll see you later.
202
00:07:51,238 --> 00:07:53,138
(clears throat
softly)
203
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:55,140
I am so sorry.
You should not be leaving.
204
00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:57,112
They should be leaving.
I'll kick them out.
205
00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:59,850
No, no, no, don't do that.
Go back inside-- you know,
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00:07:59,847 --> 00:08:01,547
the longer you're out here,
the worse it'll be,
207
00:08:01,548 --> 00:08:03,048
because then they'll
think I'm upset.
208
00:08:03,050 --> 00:08:04,180
You are upset.
209
00:08:04,184 --> 00:08:06,184
No, no, I'm not.
210
00:08:06,186 --> 00:08:08,816
Just go back inside
and talk to them.
211
00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:10,492
Oh, yeah, and remind your mom
212
00:08:10,491 --> 00:08:11,821
about the time
we got mani-pedis,
213
00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,585
and a smoothie,
and we split an Orange Zinger,
214
00:08:13,594 --> 00:08:15,734
and she said that I felt like
the daughter that she never had,
215
00:08:15,729 --> 00:08:17,759
and make it seem like
I told you that at the time
216
00:08:17,764 --> 00:08:19,204
because I was so touched,
and not today, okay?
217
00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:20,569
Okay, go. Go.
218
00:08:20,567 --> 00:08:22,067
PETRA:
Honestly, go.
219
00:08:22,069 --> 00:08:24,569
We'll be fine.
I was planning
on staying over.
220
00:08:24,571 --> 00:08:26,241
I've got it covered.
221
00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:28,240
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Well, Helga has it covered.
222
00:08:28,242 --> 00:08:29,812
And Wilma.
223
00:08:29,810 --> 00:08:32,240
Well, I guess
you could sit in here
224
00:08:32,246 --> 00:08:34,076
with Helga and Wilma
all night.
225
00:08:35,916 --> 00:08:37,646
(laughs)
226
00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:40,521
See? They think
it's silly, too.
227
00:08:47,895 --> 00:08:50,595
Heard you've
been looking for me.
228
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:54,199
The cops send you?
229
00:08:54,201 --> 00:08:55,901
No.
230
00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:58,573
But they do want
to talk to you.
231
00:08:58,572 --> 00:09:01,042
I went to prep school
with a topflight attorney.
232
00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:03,141
I'll let him know.
Good.
233
00:09:03,143 --> 00:09:06,783
Okay, look, man, this isn't
about the cops, okay?
234
00:09:06,780 --> 00:09:08,580
Up until a few months ago,
235
00:09:08,582 --> 00:09:10,582
I didn't even know
I had a brother.
236
00:09:10,584 --> 00:09:12,124
Did-did you know?
237
00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:14,989
About me?
No.
238
00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:17,158
Okay.
239
00:09:17,157 --> 00:09:20,057
I mean, so, can... can
we at least just talk?
240
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,590
Maybe.
241
00:09:21,595 --> 00:09:23,295
I'll be in touch.
242
00:09:23,297 --> 00:09:25,297
I'm staying here, by the way.
243
00:09:25,299 --> 00:09:27,669
Mind if I send you the bill...
244
00:09:27,668 --> 00:09:29,268
brother?
245
00:09:29,269 --> 00:09:32,069
(door closes)
246
00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:33,312
You'll meet him in public.
247
00:09:33,307 --> 00:09:35,067
Don't go off with him alone.
248
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,605
Okay, I got it.
249
00:09:36,610 --> 00:09:38,640
(beeps twice)
250
00:09:38,645 --> 00:09:39,805
Oh.
251
00:09:39,813 --> 00:09:41,813
I... I should go.
252
00:09:41,815 --> 00:09:44,775
It's, uh... Jane.
253
00:09:44,785 --> 00:09:46,215
Yeah. Never not awkward.
254
00:09:46,219 --> 00:09:47,919
Maybe once Mateo's in college.
255
00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:49,221
Let me know when you see him.
256
00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:51,222
(smacks lips)
Okay.
257
00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,334
(beep)
258
00:09:53,327 --> 00:09:55,787
(sighs)
Hi.
259
00:09:55,796 --> 00:09:57,156
Jane, look, I'm so sorry.
260
00:09:57,164 --> 00:09:58,964
I don't care
what my parents say.
261
00:09:58,966 --> 00:10:00,896
No, no, no, it's not that.
Well, I mean,
262
00:10:00,901 --> 00:10:02,231
it's definitely that,
too, but...
263
00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:03,665
I'm worried about my dad.
264
00:10:03,670 --> 00:10:04,970
I left him a message
this morning,
265
00:10:04,972 --> 00:10:06,242
and I told him
that we were engaged,
266
00:10:06,239 --> 00:10:07,709
and he hasn't
called me back all day.
267
00:10:07,708 --> 00:10:09,108
And we want
to go check in on him,
268
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:10,709
but he told us
to give him his space.
269
00:10:10,711 --> 00:10:12,041
Okay, I'll-I'll
swing by the condo
270
00:10:12,045 --> 00:10:13,375
and see what's
going on with him.
271
00:10:13,380 --> 00:10:15,080
Thank you. I love you.
272
00:10:15,082 --> 00:10:16,852
He's gonna go check on him.
273
00:10:16,850 --> 00:10:18,080
Good. I feel better.
274
00:10:18,085 --> 00:10:19,675
Hey, can you move
275
00:10:19,686 --> 00:10:20,986
those papers?
Pablo will be here any minute.
276
00:10:20,988 --> 00:10:24,358
Yeah, sure. Sorry.
I was just making sure
277
00:10:24,358 --> 00:10:27,188
that my chapters passed
the Bechdel test.
278
00:10:29,863 --> 00:10:31,863
Yeah, she sounds
like a hard-ass.
279
00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:34,195
Have you had any movement
with Michael's parents?
280
00:10:34,201 --> 00:10:36,401
No, and I'm
so frustrated,
281
00:10:36,403 --> 00:10:38,343
because I love him so much.
282
00:10:38,338 --> 00:10:41,138
(buzzer sounds)
But I don't know
how to prove that to them.
283
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:42,671
(groans)
284
00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:43,676
Look who it is.
285
00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:45,207
Finally.
Okay, good.
286
00:10:45,212 --> 00:10:47,212
Bechdel test, take two.
287
00:10:47,214 --> 00:10:49,154
Why aren't you dressed? Pablo's
gonna be here any minute.
288
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,949
(buzzer sounds)
Geez, this thing is tough.
289
00:10:58,859 --> 00:11:01,929
Ma, stop being
ridiculous.
290
00:11:08,835 --> 00:11:09,865
(both chuckle)
291
00:11:19,813 --> 00:11:23,383
Fine. What's
the undeniable proof?
292
00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:31,856
Afterwards, we will
consider sending him away.
293
00:11:33,794 --> 00:11:36,034
(sighs)
294
00:12:27,481 --> 00:12:29,881
JANE:
Abuela, there are, like, 100 different
295
00:12:29,883 --> 00:12:32,223
environmental factors that
go into an early frost.
296
00:12:39,059 --> 00:12:40,289
(doorbell rings)
(gasps)
297
00:12:40,293 --> 00:12:41,763
He's here!
Come on, Abuela.
298
00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:43,292
No, no, no, no, no. Dame.
299
00:12:53,774 --> 00:12:55,844
Please
come in.
300
00:12:55,842 --> 00:12:58,512
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Okay, this could totally be explained
301
00:12:58,512 --> 00:13:00,512
by a fuse blowing or a power outage.
302
00:13:00,514 --> 00:13:02,054
(gasps)
Or is it...
303
00:13:02,048 --> 00:13:04,978
the Curse of Pablo Alonso Segura?
304
00:13:10,991 --> 00:13:13,061
It's just our house. The other
houses on the street have power.
305
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,303
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Not entirely true.
306
00:13:23,403 --> 00:13:26,303
Good question.
Let me go check on her.
307
00:13:32,245 --> 00:13:33,405
Stop.
308
00:13:33,413 --> 00:13:34,883
It's not a curse.
309
00:13:34,881 --> 00:13:36,111
You're being silly.
310
00:13:37,884 --> 00:13:40,324
Yes. And you're being rude.
311
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:42,590
Now, that nice man travelled
a long way to see you
312
00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:44,589
and, yes, maybe
we shouldn't have invited him,
313
00:13:44,591 --> 00:13:46,461
but I read those chats,
314
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:49,459
and you certainly wrote
pretty vividly
315
00:13:49,462 --> 00:13:51,462
about wanting to see him.
316
00:13:51,464 --> 00:13:54,604
So I'm gonna need you to come
out of this room right now.
317
00:13:54,601 --> 00:13:57,241
And I would change
because he's fine.
318
00:14:02,442 --> 00:14:05,312
Just one more minute.
319
00:14:05,312 --> 00:14:07,912
It'll be quick,
320
00:14:07,914 --> 00:14:09,314
painless,
321
00:14:09,316 --> 00:14:12,116
and when our death goes viral,
322
00:14:12,118 --> 00:14:13,418
we'll be famous.
323
00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:15,190
And they'll make a movie
about us,
324
00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:17,458
maybe.
At this point, Rogelio's life
325
00:14:17,457 --> 00:14:20,017
actually did start to flash before him.
326
00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:22,226
¶ ¶
327
00:14:24,331 --> 00:14:27,131
His first smile.
328
00:14:27,133 --> 00:14:29,503
¶ ¶
329
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:33,444
Wait, what?
330
00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:37,610
Oh, yeah. This part is really happening.
331
00:14:37,611 --> 00:14:40,611
And now's a good time to remind you that Jane's fiancé
332
00:14:40,614 --> 00:14:42,414
is a detective.
333
00:14:42,415 --> 00:14:44,115
And remember, he was sent by Jane
334
00:14:44,117 --> 00:14:45,577
to see if Rogelio was okay.
335
00:14:45,585 --> 00:14:49,115
Huh. Since when does Rogelio not rush out
336
00:14:49,122 --> 00:14:51,462
to open his monthly Cosmetic Crate delivery?
337
00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:09,970
And here is where we left off.
338
00:15:18,652 --> 00:15:20,992
Lola, could we do this outside?
339
00:15:20,987 --> 00:15:25,117
The dramatic skyline, the
sound of the ocean behind us--
340
00:15:25,125 --> 00:15:27,385
it'll add more
production value.
341
00:15:27,394 --> 00:15:29,134
Please, please,
don't-don't let me die
342
00:15:29,129 --> 00:15:33,459
against a flat background lit
by unflattering light.
343
00:15:47,981 --> 00:15:50,281
Okay. We'll go outside...
344
00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:51,683
Drop the weapon.
Oh!
345
00:15:51,685 --> 00:15:52,415
Drop it.
Drop it.
No!
346
00:15:52,419 --> 00:15:53,349
(grunting)
347
00:15:53,353 --> 00:15:54,423
No.
348
00:15:54,421 --> 00:15:56,021
Let me go!
Calm down.
349
00:15:56,022 --> 00:15:57,162
Rogelio!
350
00:15:57,157 --> 00:15:58,417
It's over.
No!
351
00:15:58,425 --> 00:15:59,655
Rogelio!
352
00:15:59,659 --> 00:16:03,529
(shouting
indistinctly)
(exhales)
353
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:06,300
(inhales deeply)
354
00:16:08,735 --> 00:16:12,365
¶ ¶
355
00:17:06,793 --> 00:17:07,793
Jane!
(gasps)
356
00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:09,464
It's fine!
357
00:17:09,462 --> 00:17:11,262
Just the wind! Finish
what you were saying.
358
00:17:11,264 --> 00:17:12,664
(phone rings)
359
00:17:12,665 --> 00:17:15,265
Michael...
360
00:17:17,670 --> 00:17:19,740
Dad was kidnapped.
361
00:17:28,148 --> 00:17:29,408
Is there a particular concealer
you'd recommend
362
00:17:29,416 --> 00:17:31,446
for an injury of this kind?
Uh,
363
00:17:31,451 --> 00:17:32,781
concealer, like...
364
00:17:32,786 --> 00:17:35,086
Makeup. To cover up wounds.
365
00:17:35,088 --> 00:17:37,588
Surely I'm not the first
to ask this.
Dad!
366
00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:39,490
Oh, my God. Are you okay? Oh.
367
00:17:39,492 --> 00:17:40,762
Yes, I'm okay, I'm okay.
368
00:17:44,164 --> 00:17:47,604
Oh.
(exhales)
369
00:17:50,770 --> 00:17:53,670
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
And then they remembered they were broken up.
370
00:17:56,109 --> 00:17:57,839
And this guy.
371
00:17:57,844 --> 00:18:00,414
My hero.
My best friend.
372
00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:03,753
And now my daughter's fiancé.
I'm so happy for you two!
373
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:05,750
WOMAN:
Oh... my...
God!
374
00:18:10,223 --> 00:18:12,463
Soledad, what are
you doing here?
I heard what happened.
375
00:18:12,459 --> 00:18:13,829
The news outlet
has it now.
376
00:18:13,827 --> 00:18:15,487
It's a huge story
everywhere.
377
00:18:15,495 --> 00:18:16,855
Really?
Oh, yeah.
378
00:18:16,863 --> 00:18:18,363
I'm getting calls
from big people.
379
00:18:18,364 --> 00:18:19,734
How about...
Not yet.
380
00:18:19,732 --> 00:18:21,472
Might we...
I'm putting out
feelers.
381
00:18:21,468 --> 00:18:22,698
JANE:
Who are they
talking about?
382
00:18:22,702 --> 00:18:24,602
José Díaz-Balart
from Telemundo.
383
00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:26,604
It's your dad's dream
to be interviewed by him.
384
00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:28,866
Just don't tell the story to any
other news outlets, all right?
385
00:18:28,875 --> 00:18:31,735
Because JDB would need
an exclusive.
My lips
386
00:18:31,744 --> 00:18:35,184
are sealed.
But you can
talk to family.
387
00:18:35,181 --> 00:18:37,781
Are you okay?
What happened?
388
00:18:38,718 --> 00:18:40,718
I'm fine.
389
00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:42,890
I just want to put it behind me.
390
00:18:42,889 --> 00:18:46,219
Oh, my God.
1.3 million more
391
00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:48,456
Twitter followers.
I know.
392
00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:51,331
I know. Oh,
I can't even.
I can't even.
393
00:18:51,331 --> 00:18:54,501
I really can't even.
I can't even even can't even.
394
00:18:54,501 --> 00:18:57,571
I seriously can't even.
395
00:18:58,505 --> 00:19:00,635
Is she in there?
396
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:01,910
Thank you.
397
00:19:01,908 --> 00:19:03,638
Good morning.
398
00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:07,283
What are you doing here?
399
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:09,350
The band canceled
for the live music series.
400
00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:10,879
Weren't you copied
on the e-mails?
401
00:19:10,884 --> 00:19:12,554
I've called the agencies.
Now I have about...
402
00:19:12,552 --> 00:19:15,322
15 artists to listen to.
I can take care
of that.
403
00:19:15,321 --> 00:19:17,221
You just had twins.
404
00:19:17,223 --> 00:19:18,823
You heard what Dr. Grove said.
I'm been cleared
405
00:19:18,825 --> 00:19:21,285
to resume regular activities,
hence... (chuckles)
406
00:19:21,294 --> 00:19:23,834
Not every mother
has to stay home.
407
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:25,700
I actually feel happy here.
408
00:19:25,698 --> 00:19:28,798
But, hey, if you want
to go upstairs, by all means.
409
00:19:28,801 --> 00:19:30,671
JANE:
Well, excuse me.
410
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:32,700
Who is the most handsome boy
in the whole world?
411
00:19:32,705 --> 00:19:36,165
Is it you, Mr. Sweetface?
(chewing sounds)
412
00:19:36,176 --> 00:19:38,836
Huh? Yes?
Maybe you should come with me
413
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:40,545
to dinner
with Michael's parents later.
414
00:19:40,547 --> 00:19:42,447
Right?
'Cause nobody can resist you.
415
00:19:42,448 --> 00:19:45,778
(phone chimes)
Oh. Oh, what is this?
416
00:19:45,785 --> 00:19:48,245
An e-mail
from Professor Donaldson.
417
00:19:48,254 --> 00:19:49,454
Should we open it, Mateo?
418
00:19:49,455 --> 00:19:51,185
Should we?
419
00:19:52,492 --> 00:19:54,332
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
That's it?
420
00:19:54,327 --> 00:19:55,957
Yes. That was the whole e-mail.
421
00:19:55,962 --> 00:19:57,662
And now I have to
go meet with her.
422
00:19:57,664 --> 00:19:59,264
Which, heads up, I'm dreading.
423
00:19:59,265 --> 00:20:00,565
XIOMARA:
Relax, hon.
424
00:20:00,567 --> 00:20:02,897
She's obviously just
a really cold person.
425
00:20:05,605 --> 00:20:06,935
Keep up the good,
brave work.
426
00:20:06,940 --> 00:20:09,870
Thanks. Thanks so much.
427
00:20:14,681 --> 00:20:16,281
Come on in.
428
00:20:17,517 --> 00:20:19,877
So, I got your heads-up.
Yeah,
I never like
429
00:20:19,886 --> 00:20:21,516
you kids to be blindsided.
430
00:20:21,521 --> 00:20:23,691
Everyone's so, you know,
"sensitive" these days.
431
00:20:23,690 --> 00:20:25,560
But, yeah, not into it.
432
00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:28,758
So how can I address
your concerns?
433
00:20:28,761 --> 00:20:30,631
Because I do think, overall,
434
00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:32,630
the work passed
the Bechdel test.
435
00:20:32,632 --> 00:20:34,632
Well, yeah, big whoop.
436
00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:36,574
That's pretty baseline, right?
437
00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:38,599
Let me ask you
a question.
438
00:20:38,605 --> 00:20:40,935
What kind of a book
are you writing?
439
00:20:40,940 --> 00:20:43,470
Is it, you know, like,
a book for bored housewives?
440
00:20:43,476 --> 00:20:45,876
Or is it... about something?
441
00:20:45,878 --> 00:20:47,348
It should be noted that Jane found this
442
00:20:47,347 --> 00:20:48,547
more than slightly offensive.
443
00:20:48,548 --> 00:20:50,478
Both, I'm hoping.
444
00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:51,883
Well, then you better get back
to work.
445
00:20:51,884 --> 00:20:54,454
'Cause it's, you know, not now.
446
00:20:54,454 --> 00:20:55,724
Maybe put it
in context.
447
00:20:55,722 --> 00:20:58,462
Give it a "frame."
448
00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:03,490
DIRECTOR:
Move the frame to the left.
449
00:21:15,041 --> 00:21:16,911
Good.
450
00:21:16,909 --> 00:21:20,009
Now we go to soft focus
and reveal it's a dream.
451
00:21:20,013 --> 00:21:21,713
Cut!
452
00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:26,984
Rogelio.
Are you okay?
Mm-hmm?
453
00:21:26,986 --> 00:21:29,386
You're not kissing with
your usual passion.
454
00:21:29,389 --> 00:21:30,659
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR (coughs):
Tongue.
455
00:21:30,657 --> 00:21:32,717
Yes. I'm fine.
456
00:21:32,725 --> 00:21:34,985
I'm fine.
457
00:21:34,994 --> 00:21:37,064
Jane. Hi.
458
00:21:37,063 --> 00:21:39,003
What a surprise.
459
00:21:38,998 --> 00:21:41,628
Oh. Hey, Dad.
I just came by
460
00:21:41,634 --> 00:21:43,504
to check in,
see how you're doing.
461
00:21:43,503 --> 00:21:45,543
Incredible.
462
00:21:45,538 --> 00:21:48,808
I feel that I'm accessing this
whole new set of emotions
463
00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:51,478
and their corresponding
facial expressions.
464
00:21:51,477 --> 00:21:53,477
I'm more...
465
00:21:53,479 --> 00:21:55,549
wounded now.
466
00:21:56,416 --> 00:21:58,416
But sexy wounded.
467
00:21:58,418 --> 00:22:00,688
Probably that's what
JDB responded to.
468
00:22:00,687 --> 00:22:02,817
José Díaz-Balart?
469
00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:05,022
Fine, you pried it out of me.
470
00:22:05,024 --> 00:22:08,634
Yes, I will be sharing the
harrowing tale of my kidnapping
471
00:22:08,628 --> 00:22:10,698
with him exclusively.
472
00:22:10,697 --> 00:22:12,627
Oh, wow.
473
00:22:12,632 --> 00:22:14,832
It means that I'll be late to
your engagement party, though.
474
00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:16,104
Is that okay?
475
00:22:16,102 --> 00:22:18,702
Don't even think about it.
But, Dad,
476
00:22:18,705 --> 00:22:21,105
I haven't even
heard what happened.
477
00:22:21,107 --> 00:22:22,707
D-Do you want to tell me, maybe?
478
00:22:22,709 --> 00:22:25,639
I do.
479
00:22:27,847 --> 00:22:29,747
Bu-But I also
want it to be fresh,
480
00:22:29,749 --> 00:22:31,749
so I don't seem rehearsed,
you know?
481
00:22:31,751 --> 00:22:34,621
Is that it? Because
we haven't even talked.
482
00:22:34,620 --> 00:22:36,750
I-I'm sorry that I was late
to your premiere.
483
00:22:36,756 --> 00:22:38,616
Oh, stop it. No, I'm fine.
484
00:22:38,624 --> 00:22:41,034
I just want to move forward.
485
00:22:41,027 --> 00:22:43,387
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Which Jane understood, after all.
486
00:22:43,396 --> 00:22:46,126
Which brings us here, now.
487
00:22:46,132 --> 00:22:47,872
So, I-I just wanted
to say thank you
488
00:22:47,867 --> 00:22:49,127
for agreeing to come to dinner.
489
00:22:49,135 --> 00:22:50,765
And honestly,
490
00:22:50,770 --> 00:22:52,540
I understand
where you're coming from,
491
00:22:52,538 --> 00:22:54,138
how it looks...
It looks like
492
00:22:54,140 --> 00:22:57,040
you fell in love with someone
else and dumped our son.
493
00:22:57,043 --> 00:22:59,083
Right.
494
00:22:59,078 --> 00:23:01,378
And I know
it seems like that,
495
00:23:01,381 --> 00:23:03,611
but just to explain myself
a little,
496
00:23:03,616 --> 00:23:06,516
I was accidentally
artificially inseminated.
497
00:23:06,519 --> 00:23:08,489
My whole life
was upside down.
498
00:23:08,488 --> 00:23:10,448
And so you left the one person
who stood beside you.
499
00:23:10,456 --> 00:23:12,016
You threw him out like a...
500
00:23:12,024 --> 00:23:14,134
Dirty tissue.
Exactly.
501
00:23:14,127 --> 00:23:15,827
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
On the bright side,
502
00:23:15,828 --> 00:23:18,028
these two are really getting along.
503
00:23:18,030 --> 00:23:19,930
How do we know
you won't do it again?
504
00:23:19,932 --> 00:23:22,032
Guys, go easy.
505
00:23:22,034 --> 00:23:23,904
It's okay.
It's fine.
506
00:23:23,903 --> 00:23:25,773
You can ask me
anything you want.
507
00:23:25,772 --> 00:23:28,042
And yes,
I left Michael.
508
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:29,410
And I regret it.
509
00:23:29,409 --> 00:23:32,709
And I would
never do it again.
510
00:23:32,712 --> 00:23:35,812
Were you dating them both
at the same time?
511
00:23:35,815 --> 00:23:36,845
As soon as I realized
I had feelings
512
00:23:36,849 --> 00:23:38,519
for Rafael, I told Michael.
513
00:23:38,518 --> 00:23:40,578
Yeah, and then threw him aside,
no second thoughts.
514
00:23:40,586 --> 00:23:41,846
Well, I-I didn't
want to lead him on.
515
00:23:41,854 --> 00:23:43,054
How long did you wait
516
00:23:43,055 --> 00:23:44,655
before getting together
with Rafael?
517
00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:46,117
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Whoa. This must be
518
00:23:46,125 --> 00:23:47,925
where Michael gets his interrogation skills.
519
00:23:50,596 --> 00:23:52,956
Well, that isn't the point,
I told him...
520
00:23:52,965 --> 00:23:53,995
How long, Jane?
521
00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,430
That same night.
522
00:23:57,203 --> 00:23:58,803
That same night?
523
00:23:58,805 --> 00:24:00,135
And now you want my son
524
00:24:00,139 --> 00:24:01,739
to help raise
this other guy's kid?
525
00:24:01,741 --> 00:24:03,041
Enough.
526
00:24:03,042 --> 00:24:04,782
This is not
some other guy's kid.
527
00:24:04,777 --> 00:24:06,477
This is Mateo. And I love him,
528
00:24:06,479 --> 00:24:08,509
and I love Jane. Way too much
529
00:24:08,514 --> 00:24:10,214
to be putting up
with this disrespect.
530
00:24:10,216 --> 00:24:11,876
Come on,
we're leaving.
531
00:24:29,735 --> 00:24:32,165
Abuela, enough. (sighs)
What am I supposed to do?
532
00:24:32,171 --> 00:24:33,971
Michael's parents don't like me.
533
00:24:36,976 --> 00:24:38,106
Ma, come on, it's Jane.
534
00:24:38,110 --> 00:24:39,580
What?
Nothing.
535
00:24:39,579 --> 00:24:41,049
Just that...
536
00:24:41,047 --> 00:24:42,877
you have a compulsive need
to be liked.
537
00:24:42,882 --> 00:24:44,012
I do not.
538
00:24:44,016 --> 00:24:45,176
Jane.
539
00:24:46,152 --> 00:24:47,752
I don't.
540
00:24:47,753 --> 00:24:49,793
I just want my freaking
in-laws to like me.
541
00:24:49,789 --> 00:24:53,659
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
And her freakin' advisor.
542
00:24:53,659 --> 00:24:57,529
MARLENE:
What's the context? What's the frame?
543
00:25:17,250 --> 00:25:18,650
RAFAEL:
So, was it any good?
544
00:25:18,651 --> 00:25:20,621
Ugh. No idea.
545
00:25:20,620 --> 00:25:21,990
Honestly, my brain is fried,
546
00:25:21,988 --> 00:25:24,888
but there's a frame.
They are
547
00:25:24,891 --> 00:25:27,121
beautiful, Raf.
Thank you.
548
00:25:27,126 --> 00:25:29,226
Are you ready to have a playdate
with your sisters? (whooshes)
549
00:25:29,228 --> 00:25:30,958
Oh. (chuckles)
550
00:25:30,963 --> 00:25:33,903
I'll leave you to it.
I got to go grade papers.
551
00:25:33,900 --> 00:25:36,170
Oh, um, can I ask you
a question, actually?
552
00:25:36,168 --> 00:25:38,968
It's about Petra.
553
00:25:38,971 --> 00:25:41,571
I'm worried she's not really
bonding with the babies.
554
00:25:41,574 --> 00:25:43,774
What do you mean?
Well, she's not
holding them, really.
555
00:25:43,776 --> 00:25:46,276
And she's working already,
and I can't bring it up
556
00:25:46,279 --> 00:25:48,009
without her accusing me
of treating her
557
00:25:48,014 --> 00:25:49,714
like a 1950s housewife.
558
00:25:49,715 --> 00:25:51,075
Is that normal?
559
00:25:51,083 --> 00:25:52,723
I don't know.
I mean, everybody's
560
00:25:52,718 --> 00:25:54,288
experience is different, right?
561
00:25:54,287 --> 00:25:56,717
I mean, I became a shut-in.
M-My mom had to basically
562
00:25:56,722 --> 00:25:58,192
force me out of the house.
563
00:25:58,190 --> 00:26:00,790
Yeah, well, the mom thing
isn't really an option.
564
00:26:00,793 --> 00:26:02,893
So, um...
565
00:26:02,895 --> 00:26:05,595
maybe you'll
have to give her the push?
566
00:26:05,598 --> 00:26:06,958
It'll happen.
567
00:26:06,966 --> 00:26:08,266
And when they bond-- I mean,
568
00:26:08,267 --> 00:26:10,067
that mother-child
thing is intense.
569
00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:12,599
Isn't it? Isn't it, Mateo?
570
00:26:14,607 --> 00:26:16,667
(phone dings)
Say "Bye, Mommy."
571
00:26:18,678 --> 00:26:21,348
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Yup. It sure is.
572
00:26:21,347 --> 00:26:24,207
Slight change of plans:
I'm on my way to Fort Myers.
573
00:26:24,216 --> 00:26:25,616
What?
574
00:26:25,618 --> 00:26:26,918
Michael's parents left.
575
00:26:26,919 --> 00:26:28,349
They said that
they weren't coming
576
00:26:28,354 --> 00:26:29,954
to the engagement party,
so I'm going there.
577
00:26:29,956 --> 00:26:31,086
Jane.
578
00:26:32,091 --> 00:26:33,291
What?
579
00:26:33,292 --> 00:26:35,362
It's only 112 more miles.
580
00:26:35,361 --> 00:26:38,761
This is crazy.
So they don't like you.
581
00:26:38,764 --> 00:26:40,034
It's not about them liking me!
582
00:26:41,334 --> 00:26:42,774
Okay, well, it kind of is,
583
00:26:42,768 --> 00:26:44,298
but it's about Michael, too.
584
00:26:44,303 --> 00:26:47,103
I mean, he wants
his family there.
585
00:26:47,106 --> 00:26:49,706
And plus, you know, I-I get
why they're protective.
586
00:26:49,709 --> 00:26:51,909
I get the parent-child bond.
587
00:26:51,911 --> 00:26:54,781
So I just want to appeal
to Mrs. Cordero as a mother.
588
00:26:56,248 --> 00:26:57,978
MRS. CORDERO:
Jane, really,
589
00:26:57,984 --> 00:26:59,654
this isn't a good time.
No, no, no, please,
590
00:26:59,652 --> 00:27:01,252
l-let me just say one thing.
Please.
591
00:27:01,253 --> 00:27:05,223
I am so sorry. And you know
what, I know how you feel.
592
00:27:05,224 --> 00:27:08,994
If anyone broke Mateo's heart,
oh, my God. Oh, my God.
593
00:27:08,995 --> 00:27:11,655
Right now...
I just-I just want one more
chance to prove to you
594
00:27:11,664 --> 00:27:14,304
how much I love your son.
And I do. That's why I'm here.
595
00:27:14,300 --> 00:27:16,630
Because if you don't
come, you'll hurt him.
596
00:27:16,636 --> 00:27:20,896
And I know you don't want
that. No mother wants that.
597
00:27:20,906 --> 00:27:23,266
I'll think about it.
598
00:27:23,275 --> 00:27:25,735
And if you'll excuse me...
599
00:27:25,745 --> 00:27:27,805
I really should
get back to my book club.
600
00:27:28,748 --> 00:27:30,208
Your...
601
00:27:33,886 --> 00:27:37,046
Sorry about that.
602
00:27:37,056 --> 00:27:41,086
I-If it makes any difference,
I loved that book, too.
603
00:27:44,096 --> 00:27:46,026
Okay.
604
00:27:46,032 --> 00:27:47,302
(knocking)
605
00:27:47,299 --> 00:27:49,369
Hey.
606
00:27:49,368 --> 00:27:52,298
Hi. (giggles)
607
00:27:52,304 --> 00:27:55,444
I heard you paid a little
visit to my mom's book club.
608
00:27:55,441 --> 00:27:57,441
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
609
00:27:57,443 --> 00:27:59,443
I didn't know they were
all gonna be sitting there.
610
00:27:59,445 --> 00:28:01,305
No, don't apologize.
It worked.
611
00:28:01,313 --> 00:28:02,783
My parents are coming
to the party.
612
00:28:02,782 --> 00:28:05,082
Apparently
613
00:28:05,084 --> 00:28:07,454
the, uh, book club ladies
were really feeling you.
614
00:28:07,453 --> 00:28:09,723
Yeah, well, I mean,
those are my people.
615
00:28:09,722 --> 00:28:11,792
Thank you for doing that.
616
00:28:11,791 --> 00:28:14,161
Of course. Family matters.
617
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:16,160
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Ah, yes, Family Matters.
618
00:28:16,162 --> 00:28:19,232
It wasn't just a terrific Friday night TV staple.
619
00:28:19,231 --> 00:28:23,101
It was also a mantra Rafael was leaning on in this moment.
620
00:28:23,102 --> 00:28:24,302
So...
621
00:28:24,303 --> 00:28:25,373
tell me about yourself.
622
00:28:25,371 --> 00:28:27,001
I'm not talkative.
623
00:28:27,006 --> 00:28:29,106
Anything else?
624
00:28:29,108 --> 00:28:30,208
Nope.
625
00:28:30,209 --> 00:28:32,279
How's the food?
626
00:28:32,278 --> 00:28:34,038
Mm.
627
00:28:34,046 --> 00:28:35,306
Okay, man, come on,
628
00:28:35,314 --> 00:28:36,984
I'm just trying
to get to know you.
629
00:28:38,851 --> 00:28:41,051
Then ask the question
you really want to know.
630
00:28:43,289 --> 00:28:45,119
Did you know our mother
was a crime lord?
631
00:28:45,124 --> 00:28:46,924
No. Did you?
632
00:28:46,926 --> 00:28:49,126
No. But I'm not the one
who disappeared
633
00:28:49,128 --> 00:28:51,398
after she was exposed.
634
00:28:51,397 --> 00:28:53,157
And I didn't have tunnels
under my hotel
635
00:28:53,165 --> 00:28:54,795
where people did
illegal surgeries.
636
00:28:57,770 --> 00:28:59,170
Where were you?
637
00:28:59,171 --> 00:29:00,771
You really want to know?
638
00:29:00,773 --> 00:29:02,373
I do.
639
00:29:02,374 --> 00:29:04,144
Fine.
640
00:29:04,143 --> 00:29:06,213
Let's go.
641
00:29:09,115 --> 00:29:11,775
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Wait. No. What did Michael say?
642
00:29:11,784 --> 00:29:14,124
Don't follow him anywhere.
643
00:29:15,187 --> 00:29:18,057
And yet, there he goes.
644
00:29:18,057 --> 00:29:20,357
Right this way.
So, you can prepare here.
645
00:29:20,359 --> 00:29:22,289
Sorry there's not more room.
646
00:29:22,294 --> 00:29:25,234
Are you kidding? It's like
four cubano trucks in here.
647
00:29:27,099 --> 00:29:28,969
(gasps) Ooh,
648
00:29:28,968 --> 00:29:31,028
sexy, Ma.
649
00:29:34,173 --> 00:29:36,513
And you sure it's not
for your date after?
650
00:29:36,509 --> 00:29:38,509
Hmm?
You're gonna lose
651
00:29:38,511 --> 00:29:41,381
that sweater, right? And show
Pablo that hot little bod?
652
00:29:41,380 --> 00:29:43,180
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
It's safe to say this
653
00:29:43,182 --> 00:29:45,922
conversation fails the Bechdel test miserably.
654
00:29:45,918 --> 00:29:48,188
(phone buzzes)
655
00:29:48,187 --> 00:29:50,347
Hello?
656
00:29:50,356 --> 00:29:51,956
What?
657
00:29:51,957 --> 00:29:53,917
Oh, no.
658
00:29:53,926 --> 00:29:56,456
Yeah, I'll be there.
659
00:29:56,462 --> 00:29:59,002
Be there? Where are you going?
The party's gonna start.
660
00:29:58,998 --> 00:30:02,028
And I'll be back as soon as
I can, but that was Dad's agent.
661
00:30:05,805 --> 00:30:08,235
What-what are you doing here?
662
00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:10,810
I heard you were
having a hard time.
663
00:30:12,211 --> 00:30:15,251
What's going on?
664
00:30:15,247 --> 00:30:18,247
I just...
665
00:30:18,250 --> 00:30:20,420
I don't think
I can do this interview.
666
00:30:20,419 --> 00:30:22,989
And you don't have to
if you don't want to.
667
00:30:22,988 --> 00:30:25,388
No, but I do want to,
that's the point.
668
00:30:25,391 --> 00:30:27,391
It's one of my #LifeGoals.
669
00:30:27,393 --> 00:30:29,263
I always wanted
to open my heart and soul
670
00:30:29,261 --> 00:30:30,891
to José Díaz-Balart.
671
00:30:30,896 --> 00:30:32,226
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Who doesn't?
672
00:30:32,231 --> 00:30:34,001
But I don't know.
673
00:30:33,999 --> 00:30:36,269
It's just,
every time I think about
674
00:30:36,268 --> 00:30:40,098
saying it out loud...
675
00:30:40,105 --> 00:30:41,565
I get choked up.
676
00:30:41,574 --> 00:30:44,014
And not like a single tear
677
00:30:44,009 --> 00:30:46,139
glistening down my cheek thing,
678
00:30:46,145 --> 00:30:47,875
but like...
679
00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:51,010
Oh, Dad, of course
you're going to cry.
680
00:30:51,016 --> 00:30:53,546
It's a really traumatic thing
that happened.
681
00:30:53,552 --> 00:30:56,422
I don't want people
to see me as a victim.
682
00:30:56,422 --> 00:30:59,892
I want to seem like a powerful,
extraordinary actor.
683
00:30:59,892 --> 00:31:01,192
You can be both.
684
00:31:01,193 --> 00:31:03,033
But what if people
make fun of me--
685
00:31:03,028 --> 00:31:05,298
memes, GIFs?
686
00:31:05,297 --> 00:31:06,857
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Or is it JIFs?
687
00:31:06,866 --> 00:31:08,866
Well, not everybody's
gonna like you.
688
00:31:08,868 --> 00:31:10,868
Which is a lesson
I've been learning.
689
00:31:10,870 --> 00:31:12,640
Well, that's not
too helpful to me,
690
00:31:12,638 --> 00:31:15,608
because I'm trying to build
a social media dynasty.
691
00:31:15,608 --> 00:31:20,638
Well, personally, I don't think
anybody's gonna make fun of you
692
00:31:20,646 --> 00:31:23,576
if you're honest and vulnerable,
and that's all you can do.
693
00:31:23,582 --> 00:31:25,922
What if I can't
get through it?
694
00:31:25,918 --> 00:31:28,418
You want to practice with me?
695
00:31:28,420 --> 00:31:31,220
No. You have to go
to your engagement party.
696
00:31:31,223 --> 00:31:33,393
This is more important.
697
00:31:35,661 --> 00:31:37,591
Now what happened?
698
00:31:37,596 --> 00:31:40,056
(sniffles)
699
00:31:40,065 --> 00:31:43,125
I thought
I was going to die, Jane.
700
00:31:43,135 --> 00:31:45,465
Oh, Dad.
701
00:31:45,471 --> 00:31:47,441
Oh.
702
00:31:49,375 --> 00:31:52,175
Yes. Say good-bye.
703
00:31:52,177 --> 00:31:54,537
Good night.
704
00:31:57,683 --> 00:32:00,523
She's still with her dad.
705
00:32:00,519 --> 00:32:02,319
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Let's move on, shall we?
706
00:32:02,321 --> 00:32:05,421
I could use a breather from all this tension.
707
00:32:09,161 --> 00:32:11,561
So much for taking a breather.
708
00:32:16,969 --> 00:32:19,299
Don't bother. No service.
709
00:32:19,305 --> 00:32:22,335
Come on.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: You really shouldn't go, Rafael.
710
00:32:22,341 --> 00:32:24,641
You heard what Michael said. Not alone!
You coming?
711
00:32:24,643 --> 00:32:27,343
And with Michael's words ringing in his ears,
712
00:32:27,346 --> 00:32:29,206
Rafael refused to get on the boat!
713
00:32:29,214 --> 00:32:31,054
Let's go.
714
00:32:32,985 --> 00:32:35,045
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Ugh. Well, it was worth a try.
715
00:32:40,392 --> 00:32:42,492
Tonight, we're here with
international telenovela star
716
00:32:42,494 --> 00:32:46,134
Rogelio de la Vega, and the
story you're about to hear,
717
00:32:46,131 --> 00:32:50,631
well, it's straight out
of a telenovela, honestly.
718
00:32:50,636 --> 00:32:53,196
I know. It-it really is.
719
00:32:53,205 --> 00:32:54,395
But then again, you know,
720
00:32:54,406 --> 00:32:56,736
sometimes truth is
stranger than fiction.
721
00:32:56,742 --> 00:32:59,212
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
I'll say.
722
00:32:59,211 --> 00:33:01,351
DEREK: Be up in a second.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
You'll recall,
723
00:33:01,347 --> 00:33:04,077
we left Rafael on a boat alone with his brother.
724
00:33:04,083 --> 00:33:05,983
No problem.
725
00:33:07,619 --> 00:33:10,419
(creaking, thud)
726
00:33:13,392 --> 00:33:15,692
Did you think it was a gun?
727
00:33:15,694 --> 00:33:18,304
No.
728
00:33:22,001 --> 00:33:24,371
So...
729
00:33:24,370 --> 00:33:26,000
where were you?
730
00:33:26,005 --> 00:33:27,365
Right here
731
00:33:27,373 --> 00:33:29,143
on this boat.
732
00:33:29,141 --> 00:33:31,511
In the middle of the ocean.
733
00:33:33,012 --> 00:33:35,712
I heard about my mom...
734
00:33:35,714 --> 00:33:37,784
our mom.
735
00:33:37,783 --> 00:33:40,783
They were seizing assets.
736
00:33:42,121 --> 00:33:43,691
I freaked out.
737
00:33:43,689 --> 00:33:45,519
I didn't know what to do.
738
00:33:45,524 --> 00:33:49,064
They were taking everything.
739
00:33:49,061 --> 00:33:51,401
Okay. And?
740
00:33:51,397 --> 00:33:54,027
And I sat out here, man.
741
00:33:54,033 --> 00:33:56,803
Thought about things.
742
00:33:56,802 --> 00:33:58,472
My dad, for instance.
743
00:33:58,470 --> 00:34:00,700
Ran half marathons
twice a year,
744
00:34:00,706 --> 00:34:02,706
died of a heart attack
out of the blue.
745
00:34:02,708 --> 00:34:05,808
Did she kill him?
746
00:34:05,811 --> 00:34:08,051
Things like that.
747
00:34:08,047 --> 00:34:11,647
Thought about taking the plunge
myself, briefly.
748
00:34:11,650 --> 00:34:15,790
'Cause I suddenly
had no family.
749
00:34:17,489 --> 00:34:20,589
But then I punked out
750
00:34:20,592 --> 00:34:24,062
and headed back
to good old Miami.
751
00:34:28,133 --> 00:34:30,773
But you do, though.
752
00:34:33,338 --> 00:34:34,768
Have family.
753
00:34:39,745 --> 00:34:43,575
So, you gonna pour that Scotch,
or what?
754
00:34:43,582 --> 00:34:45,352
Yeah.
755
00:34:46,485 --> 00:34:48,515
JANE:
Hi.
756
00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:50,150
Hi! Hi! Oh, I love you.
757
00:34:50,155 --> 00:34:51,785
I'm so sorry.
Thank you for coming.
758
00:34:51,790 --> 00:34:53,560
Thank you. Thank
you. Thank you.
759
00:34:53,559 --> 00:34:55,159
Michael, hi.
Hi.
760
00:34:55,160 --> 00:34:57,360
I'm sorry I'm late.
761
00:34:57,362 --> 00:34:59,562
Oh.
Me, too.
762
00:34:59,565 --> 00:35:01,595
(laughs)
763
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,600
I'll go inside. I'll give you
guys some privacy. I'll just...
764
00:35:06,705 --> 00:35:08,135
How are your parents?
765
00:35:08,140 --> 00:35:10,870
My mom is not as mad
as when she found out
766
00:35:10,876 --> 00:35:12,776
my dad slept
with his dental hygienist.
767
00:35:12,778 --> 00:35:14,338
But it's a point
of reference?
768
00:35:14,346 --> 00:35:15,706
It's definitely
a point of reference.
769
00:35:15,714 --> 00:35:17,314
Oh. Okay.
770
00:35:17,316 --> 00:35:19,676
I'm going in.
Okay.
771
00:35:22,321 --> 00:35:24,221
Michael, Patricia, hi.
772
00:35:24,223 --> 00:35:26,223
I am so sorry
I missed the party.
773
00:35:26,225 --> 00:35:28,655
My dad had
an emergency.
We heard.
774
00:35:28,660 --> 00:35:30,390
The point is,
you missed it.
775
00:35:30,395 --> 00:35:31,725
After you made
a real big deal
776
00:35:31,730 --> 00:35:33,200
about how important
it was to Michael.
777
00:35:33,198 --> 00:35:34,498
MICHAEL SR.:
And once again,
778
00:35:34,500 --> 00:35:36,200
someone else comes in first.
779
00:35:36,201 --> 00:35:37,371
I told you both not
to say anything.
780
00:35:37,369 --> 00:35:39,899
Michael, it's fine. It's fine.
781
00:35:39,905 --> 00:35:42,665
I know, but my dad really
needed me tonight.
782
00:35:44,376 --> 00:35:48,146
Okay. Forget it.
783
00:35:48,147 --> 00:35:49,907
I'm sorry you don't like me,
but you know what?
784
00:35:49,915 --> 00:35:52,675
Your son understands
why I wasn't here,
785
00:35:52,684 --> 00:35:54,524
so I'm cool.
786
00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:56,550
And I really hope that
you'll learn to live with me,
787
00:35:56,555 --> 00:35:58,185
because I'm not going anywhere.
788
00:36:00,559 --> 00:36:02,159
If we do attend
the wedding,
789
00:36:02,161 --> 00:36:03,761
it'll be for his
sake, not yours.
790
00:36:03,762 --> 00:36:05,662
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
It should be noted
791
00:36:05,664 --> 00:36:07,804
that the people-pleasing side of Jane wanted to attempt
792
00:36:07,799 --> 00:36:09,929
one last ditch charm offensive, but instead, she said...
793
00:36:09,935 --> 00:36:12,395
Noted.
794
00:36:12,404 --> 00:36:16,414
You know,
I'm turning over a new leaf.
795
00:36:16,408 --> 00:36:18,678
Who cares if
people like me?
796
00:36:18,677 --> 00:36:20,407
Cheers to that!
797
00:36:20,412 --> 00:36:21,912
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
798
00:36:21,914 --> 00:36:24,514
That's what I'm talking
about. 100% over it.
799
00:36:24,516 --> 00:36:26,946
My new motto--
take me or leave me.
800
00:36:26,952 --> 00:36:29,722
(phone chimes)
Mm.
801
00:36:29,721 --> 00:36:32,191
(gasps)
Oh, my God, oh,
my God, my advisor.
802
00:36:32,191 --> 00:36:34,521
She just e-mailed
me, "Heads up."
803
00:36:35,827 --> 00:36:37,387
"I liked your material."
804
00:36:37,396 --> 00:36:39,356
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
805
00:36:39,364 --> 00:36:40,864
She liked my material!
806
00:36:40,866 --> 00:36:43,566
Yeah. Get it. Work, work.
807
00:36:43,569 --> 00:36:45,839
But you don't care?
Mom, baby steps.
808
00:36:45,837 --> 00:36:47,867
(phone chimes, Jane gasps)
Oh.
809
00:36:47,873 --> 00:36:51,413
What?
810
00:36:51,410 --> 00:36:52,780
Oh, yeah, well,
you know what?
811
00:36:52,778 --> 00:36:54,808
I'll take it. Yeah. Uh.
812
00:36:54,813 --> 00:36:57,213
(phone buzzing)
813
00:36:57,216 --> 00:36:58,816
Oh, be right back.
It's Rafael.
814
00:36:58,817 --> 00:37:00,447
He was meeting
his brother. Sorry.
815
00:37:00,452 --> 00:37:01,992
Look, I think
Derek's telling the truth.
816
00:37:01,987 --> 00:37:03,517
I don't think he knew.
817
00:37:03,522 --> 00:37:04,892
Wait. What are you
talking about?
818
00:37:04,890 --> 00:37:06,490
You can't know that already.
819
00:37:06,491 --> 00:37:07,861
Well, I do.
820
00:37:07,859 --> 00:37:09,429
What?! Stop.
821
00:37:09,428 --> 00:37:10,988
You are being played.
822
00:37:10,996 --> 00:37:13,396
And you are entitled
to your own opinion,
823
00:37:13,398 --> 00:37:16,368
but this... this is my family.
824
00:37:17,469 --> 00:37:19,699
So investigate
all you want, man.
825
00:37:19,705 --> 00:37:21,835
I'm done.
826
00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:23,970
Thanks, man.
827
00:37:23,976 --> 00:37:25,576
Well, I meant it.
828
00:37:25,577 --> 00:37:27,007
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Hmm.
829
00:37:27,012 --> 00:37:28,882
I don't know if I like this.
830
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:30,550
I got to run.
831
00:37:32,851 --> 00:37:35,291
This, on the other hand, I'm all for.
832
00:37:35,287 --> 00:37:37,487
Hi.
Hi.
833
00:37:37,489 --> 00:37:40,019
Where are Wilma and Helga?
834
00:37:40,025 --> 00:37:41,755
I let them go,
835
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:43,760
just for a night.
836
00:37:43,762 --> 00:37:47,002
I thought it would be good
to have a bonding night.
837
00:37:46,999 --> 00:37:48,599
Just us.
838
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:50,570
As a family.
839
00:37:50,569 --> 00:37:52,769
And you don't have
to change a single diaper.
840
00:37:52,771 --> 00:37:54,771
Come here.
841
00:37:54,773 --> 00:37:56,773
Come here.
842
00:37:56,775 --> 00:37:58,635
Here, hold Elsa.
843
00:37:58,644 --> 00:38:00,784
You want to go
to your mommy.
844
00:38:00,779 --> 00:38:02,479
Come here.
845
00:38:02,481 --> 00:38:04,711
That.
846
00:38:08,320 --> 00:38:10,050
How can you even tell
which is which?
847
00:38:10,055 --> 00:38:12,555
Had Helga put an
"X" on her foot.
848
00:38:12,557 --> 00:38:15,057
(baby cooing)
849
00:38:15,060 --> 00:38:17,690
I've been having
a little trouble.
850
00:38:17,696 --> 00:38:19,656
I'm not sure this is for me.
851
00:38:19,665 --> 00:38:20,925
It is.
852
00:38:20,932 --> 00:38:22,802
I just think
part of the problem is
853
00:38:22,801 --> 00:38:24,531
that you've been avoiding them.
854
00:38:24,536 --> 00:38:26,436
(baby crying)
855
00:38:26,438 --> 00:38:30,468
Uh-oh. Someone's got
to get a diaper changed.
856
00:38:58,870 --> 00:39:02,770
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Well, there's really no way to sugarcoat it.
857
00:39:10,716 --> 00:39:12,776
Ah.
858
00:39:24,563 --> 00:39:26,933
Ah.
859
00:39:42,581 --> 00:39:44,451
Oh.
860
00:39:47,386 --> 00:39:49,516
(violin plays)
Ah.
861
00:40:07,506 --> 00:40:09,536
(tango music plays)
862
00:40:23,989 --> 00:40:26,159
Michael left?
863
00:40:26,158 --> 00:40:27,988
Yeah, he has
an early morning.
864
00:40:27,993 --> 00:40:29,493
Where's Abuela?
865
00:40:29,494 --> 00:40:32,504
Still out with Pablo.
Ooh! Nice.
866
00:40:32,497 --> 00:40:33,957
(creaking)
867
00:40:33,965 --> 00:40:36,565
Hey, did you hear that?
868
00:40:36,568 --> 00:40:39,698
(tango music playing)
869
00:40:52,851 --> 00:40:54,721
(creaking)
Wait. I hear it now.
870
00:40:54,719 --> 00:40:55,989
Is that what they mean
when they say
871
00:40:55,987 --> 00:40:57,187
that a house is settling
or whatever?
872
00:40:57,189 --> 00:40:59,959
¶ ¶
873
00:41:05,197 --> 00:41:07,697
Maybe it's the air conditioning?
(rattling)
874
00:41:07,699 --> 00:41:11,599
¶ ¶
875
00:41:15,841 --> 00:41:17,741
Oh!
876
00:41:17,742 --> 00:41:19,682
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR:
Oh, dear.
877
00:41:19,678 --> 00:41:21,738
Maybe there is something to this curse business after all.
62994
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