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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,300 --> 00:00:02,823 Previously on "Black Dynamite"... 2 00:00:02,824 --> 00:00:06,592 Black Dynamite, I'm Donald, your accountant, and as your accountant, 3 00:00:06,594 --> 00:00:09,629 I have an extremely urgent accounting matter I must discuss with ... 4 00:00:09,631 --> 00:00:13,066 I don't care if you're Merv Griffin, creator and host of "The Merv Griffin Show." 5 00:00:13,068 --> 00:00:16,702 You need to make an appointment, like everybody else, Jack. 6 00:00:16,704 --> 00:00:18,672 Damn it! 7 00:00:20,642 --> 00:00:22,242 Suey! 8 00:00:23,845 --> 00:00:27,180 Black Dynamite? 9 00:00:27,182 --> 00:00:29,182 You can't ignore this any longer. 10 00:00:29,184 --> 00:00:30,759 I tried to make an appointment like you said, but ... 11 00:00:30,810 --> 00:00:36,189 My secretary bitch is out with the shit now, don't be interrupting my kung fu! 12 00:00:36,191 --> 00:00:38,559 Suey! 13 00:00:42,763 --> 00:00:45,899 - Man, can't this wait? - No, it can't, Black Dynamite. 14 00:00:45,901 --> 00:00:47,880 - They are shooting. - Fine. Get in. 15 00:00:51,052 --> 00:00:54,774 What I've been trying to tell you is, you haven't filed income 16 00:00:54,776 --> 00:00:59,846 taxes for 8 years. You owe the I.R.S. $60,000 and now they're going to 17 00:00:59,848 --> 00:01:02,748 - fuckin' kill you! - Is that what this shit is all about? 18 00:01:04,435 --> 00:01:06,119 These motherfuckers can't be bargained with! 19 00:01:06,121 --> 00:01:10,123 They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity or remorse or fear. 20 00:01:10,125 --> 00:01:14,127 And they absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead 21 00:01:14,129 --> 00:01:21,688 or broke or in jail... or both! Incoming! 22 00:01:24,605 --> 00:01:27,707 - Donald, my accountant! - Black Dynamite, I'm not gonna 23 00:01:27,709 --> 00:01:29,642 make it... Please, promise me... 24 00:01:29,644 --> 00:01:32,011 Anything, man! Anything in the world. 25 00:01:32,013 --> 00:01:36,254 ...you'll make sure this form is postmarked by midnight on the 15th, or you... may... 26 00:01:36,301 --> 00:01:40,653 be subject to... penalties. Ahh. I'm dead. 27 00:01:44,041 --> 00:01:47,827 I'm sorry, Donald the accountant. I should have listened to you sooner. 28 00:01:47,829 --> 00:01:51,197 Looks like you're gonna need a new accountant, Black Dynamite. 29 00:01:51,232 --> 00:01:56,169 I've got until the 15th, you money-hungry bureaucratic sons of bitches! 30 00:01:56,170 --> 00:01:58,671 Scram, I say! Scram! 31 00:01:58,715 --> 00:02:01,215 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~ 32 00:02:30,193 --> 00:02:31,814 This week... 33 00:02:31,865 --> 00:02:35,158 1x03 - Taxes and Death or Get Him to the Sunset Strip 34 00:02:40,222 --> 00:02:42,886 Surprise! Right before your eyes. 35 00:02:42,887 --> 00:02:46,321 Black Dynamite, we all heard about your tax troubles 36 00:02:46,322 --> 00:02:49,756 with the I.R.S., so all the whores and the orphans in 37 00:02:49,758 --> 00:02:52,859 this here Whorephanage got together to raise you some scratch. 38 00:02:52,861 --> 00:02:56,429 These girls have already sucked every dick in a 10-mile radius. 39 00:02:56,431 --> 00:03:00,800 And me and Cream Corn planned this badass party last night to raise funds... 40 00:03:00,802 --> 00:03:04,070 and awareness for broke Black Dynamite! 41 00:03:04,072 --> 00:03:09,274 - We sold a few thousand of these ... 2 for $5. - Even these little nappy-headed orphans pitched in. 44 00:03:14,883 --> 00:03:18,685 but now that do need it, there ain't no way I'm gonna take it. 45 00:03:18,687 --> 00:03:22,421 Now get back out there on that block and get that money I don't need. 46 00:03:22,423 --> 00:03:25,992 Now I'm just thinkin' out loud, so this may 47 00:03:25,994 --> 00:03:28,383 sound berserk, but maybe B.D. can make some 48 00:03:28,384 --> 00:03:30,772 ends meet by puttin' in some mercenary work. 49 00:03:30,807 --> 00:03:32,598 - Now, that's a great idea, Bullhorn. - That is a good... 50 00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,600 I think it's a terrible idea. 51 00:03:34,602 --> 00:03:37,270 - Yeah, is kind of terrible. - The problem with taking 52 00:03:37,272 --> 00:03:39,973 somebody's money to do a job is that they always expect something in return. 53 00:03:39,975 --> 00:03:42,709 Well, I guess we'll just have to come up with another plan, then. 54 00:03:42,711 --> 00:03:46,412 Not necessarily, because sometimes, a terrible idea is the best idea you got. 55 00:03:46,414 --> 00:03:51,951 And if there's one thing I've learned, you always go with the best idea you got. 56 00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:03,697 Thank you for coming, Black Dynamite. 57 00:04:03,699 --> 00:04:06,733 I'm a motion-picture producer. That means that I produce motion pictures. 58 00:04:06,735 --> 00:04:10,345 - What do you know about Richard Pryor? - You mean the comedy man? 59 00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:12,305 - Yes, the comedian. - You say "tomato," 60 00:04:12,307 --> 00:04:15,341 - Black Dynamite says "toe-mah-toe." - We've already had massive 61 00:04:15,343 --> 00:04:19,012 success filming Richard Pryor live in concert, and we got Richard Pryor here and now 62 00:04:19,014 --> 00:04:22,582 without a hiccup. But for some reason, no one has been able to get Richard Pryor 63 00:04:22,584 --> 00:04:25,752 live on the Sunset Strip, and that's where you come in, Black Dynamite. 64 00:04:25,754 --> 00:04:27,958 - Take this. - What is this? 65 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:29,812 - His inspiration. - Oh fuck, 66 00:04:29,813 --> 00:04:31,624 why y'all didn't tell me the plane landed? 67 00:04:31,626 --> 00:04:34,828 I was on the toilet taking a shit you know when you're sitting on 68 00:04:34,830 --> 00:04:38,264 a plane, taking a shit and your ass get sucked down the toilet? 69 00:04:38,266 --> 00:04:42,736 I didn't think my ass was ever gonna come back, Jack. I said, "take the shit but 70 00:04:42,738 --> 00:04:45,805 - leave me shit". - Ha ha! Brilliant, Richie baby! 71 00:04:45,807 --> 00:04:49,542 - But save it for the show. - What's happenin', Jack? My main man. 72 00:04:49,544 --> 00:04:52,946 - Baddest fucker I ever met. Cocaine. - What's the matter, 73 00:04:52,948 --> 00:04:55,815 Black Dynamite? You've never seen a black entertainer get high? 74 00:04:55,817 --> 00:04:59,285 No. It's just that nobody's ever left me hangin' before. 75 00:04:59,287 --> 00:05:03,389 Oh fuck, is that all the cocaine we got? It's gonna be a long night, 76 00:05:03,391 --> 00:05:08,628 Jack. I snothrough mothafucker and this little briefcase ain't doin' shit. 77 00:05:09,940 --> 00:05:13,366 I fuck potential mothers, soon-to-be mothers, already mothers. 78 00:05:13,368 --> 00:05:16,602 I'm a mothafucker. I never got no fuck when I was your age. 79 00:05:16,604 --> 00:05:19,338 But livin' up in here? Y'all should be gettin' all of it. 80 00:05:19,340 --> 00:05:22,508 Hoe come in the house, I'm 7 years old. I'm punchin' the [bleep] out the 81 00:05:22,510 --> 00:05:24,978 [bleep] 'cause my [bleep] was too small. 82 00:05:24,980 --> 00:05:31,384 Uppercuttin' the [bleep] I'm knockin' [bleep] out daily. Say, baby, you remind me 83 00:05:31,386 --> 00:05:33,853 - of my mama. - Aw. Because I'm kind and nurturing? 84 00:05:33,855 --> 00:05:37,290 No, bitch! 'Cause you got big titties and you sells good shit. 85 00:05:37,292 --> 00:05:40,593 Man, Richard Pryor, you are on fire! 86 00:05:40,595 --> 00:05:44,798 And you got enough meat on your nose to make a ham sandwich, boy! 87 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:49,669 Rhyming all the damn time. I can't tell if it's a trick, a tick, a talent, or tourrette's. 88 00:05:49,671 --> 00:05:53,114 You're the funniest man alive or dead. 89 00:05:53,149 --> 00:05:55,942 Well, thank you, miss. 90 00:05:59,272 --> 00:06:04,750 Whores and orphans under one roof. Whose idea was this, anyway? 91 00:06:04,752 --> 00:06:10,623 - Mine. - Man, did you actually think about this shit before you 92 00:06:10,625 --> 00:06:14,260 put the children and the whores within fuckin' distance of each other? 93 00:06:14,262 --> 00:06:18,431 Hey, little kids. I'm Black Dynamite. I know you all ain't got no parents, 94 00:06:18,433 --> 00:06:22,535 so how 'bout I replace them with a lifetime supply of [bleep]. 95 00:06:22,537 --> 00:06:25,839 That is not what I silently said to myself inside my head! 96 00:06:26,011 --> 00:06:27,011 Suey! 97 00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:29,876 You may not find him funny, but you about to 98 00:06:29,878 --> 00:06:32,712 - fuck all your money. - Look here, Mr. Comedy man. 99 00:06:32,714 --> 00:06:36,282 Now, I don't get you or your comedy jokes or comedy in general, but what I am 100 00:06:36,284 --> 00:06:40,643 gonna get is you to the Sunset Strip so I can pay my damn taxes. Can you dig it? 101 00:06:40,678 --> 00:06:42,355 As a matter of fact, here goes a package from 102 00:06:42,357 --> 00:06:46,507 - the I.R.S. right now. - I.R.S.?! No! 103 00:06:47,542 --> 00:06:49,528 ♪ Dynamite! Dynamite! ♪ 104 00:06:49,530 --> 00:06:53,799 Looks like I need to get the fuck up out of here. Let's go get something to eat 105 00:06:53,801 --> 00:06:58,304 - before Black Dynamite kills us with his back taxes. - It's funny 'cause it's true. 106 00:06:59,806 --> 00:07:02,962 Man, I tell you ... the I.R.S. ain't no joke, Jack. 107 00:07:02,997 --> 00:07:05,855 Those mothafuckers will run right up in your ass to get they money. 108 00:07:05,856 --> 00:07:08,714 You ever notice when you look at your check, it says 109 00:07:08,716 --> 00:07:12,451 "F.E.C.A., F.I.C.A. fuck you out your money." and my accountant gonna tell me, 110 00:07:12,453 --> 00:07:16,522 "good news, Richard. You're in the black." and I'm like, "sucker, you say 111 00:07:16,524 --> 00:07:19,625 I got $2 million. Fuck! I want to see it ... in cash! 112 00:07:19,627 --> 00:07:23,662 - Drive it to me in the brinks truck right now!" - You mean to tell me 113 00:07:23,664 --> 00:07:27,367 Hollywood really pays you all that money for standing around and talkin' shit? 114 00:07:27,369 --> 00:07:30,836 That's right. But havin' people laugh at you all the time ain't all it's 115 00:07:30,838 --> 00:07:34,908 cracked up to be. Sometimes, I just want my [bleep] hugged. 116 00:07:34,910 --> 00:07:37,877 Can I get you something to drink, Mr. Pryor? 117 00:07:37,879 --> 00:07:41,514 Not unless you got some milk in them, titties. Big as them titties is, 118 00:07:41,516 --> 00:07:44,450 shouldn't be a starving kid nowhere in Africa. Nah, baby. 119 00:07:44,452 --> 00:07:47,653 I stopped drinking two minutes ago. 120 00:07:47,655 --> 00:07:49,806 That is some bullshit. 121 00:07:49,807 --> 00:07:53,285 Don't nobody believe you, Richard Pryor. 122 00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:56,762 I know you don't believe me, mothafucker 'cause you mothafuckers 123 00:07:56,764 --> 00:08:02,460 fuckin' say... "I'm drunk, and I'm the ugliest mothafucker up in here. I'm so ugly, 124 00:08:02,495 --> 00:08:07,574 the tears roll down the back of my neck. When I cry, they don't want to be on my face." 125 00:08:07,609 --> 00:08:10,564 Okay, that's enough drinkin' and jivin', you drunk jive turkeys! 126 00:08:10,599 --> 00:08:14,880 Oh, what you gonna do to me? Black Dynamite, I'm gonna kick 127 00:08:14,882 --> 00:08:20,686 your fuckin' nuts and ass so the mothafuckin' bone. Do you hear me? 128 00:08:20,688 --> 00:08:23,040 ♪ Dynamite! Dynamite! ♪ 129 00:08:23,116 --> 00:08:25,658 Man, did you see that? Them suckas got messed up, Jack, 130 00:08:25,660 --> 00:08:27,793 fuckin' around with me and my boy. No shit! 131 00:08:27,795 --> 00:08:31,364 Man, you got to show me how to do some of that stuff, Black Dynamite! 132 00:08:31,366 --> 00:08:33,412 We could be like Blackman and Robin. 133 00:08:33,521 --> 00:08:36,769 Richard Pryor, give me that gun before you hurt somebody. 134 00:08:41,945 --> 00:08:44,479 Mothafucker. 135 00:08:46,481 --> 00:08:49,182 We bad. We bad. That's right mothafucka ... 136 00:08:49,183 --> 00:08:51,884 We bad. This ain't Gene Wilder shit. 137 00:08:51,886 --> 00:08:56,222 This is Black Dynamite, and we will whup your ass, Jack. 138 00:08:59,902 --> 00:09:02,528 Do you know what we're in for? Puttin' a foot in a mothafucker's ass 139 00:09:02,530 --> 00:09:05,865 and makin' it come out his mouth! You ever seen that before? 140 00:09:08,634 --> 00:09:11,670 You think Richard Pryor's foot in your ass is a joke, boy?! 141 00:09:11,672 --> 00:09:15,608 You think I'm funny?! Well, I'm not! 142 00:09:18,937 --> 00:09:22,715 I'm tired of pouring my heart out to shit and all you do 143 00:09:22,717 --> 00:09:27,887 is laugh. Stop laughing at me. I'm serious. 144 00:09:45,205 --> 00:09:47,373 Shut the fuck up when groan men's is cryin'. 145 00:09:52,713 --> 00:09:56,849 Richard Pryor? This better not be one of your 146 00:09:56,851 --> 00:10:00,920 comedy jokes, because Black Dynamite don't ever hold no grown man in his arms like a 147 00:10:00,922 --> 00:10:04,857 baby when he's cryin' and weepin'... Especially a comedy man. 148 00:10:04,859 --> 00:10:08,661 Man, fuck the comedy man and his mama! I don't want to make these 149 00:10:08,663 --> 00:10:11,897 mothafuckers laugh. I got some real shit to say, man. 150 00:10:11,899 --> 00:10:16,469 I know how to cut through the bullshit, but don't nobody care when I say it. 151 00:10:16,471 --> 00:10:19,905 - It's always the same. - Did you hear what he said? 152 00:10:19,907 --> 00:10:25,545 He said, "it's always the same." He said, "it's always the same"! 153 00:10:25,547 --> 00:10:30,616 See what I mean? When you talk, people listen. They take your ass serious. 154 00:10:30,618 --> 00:10:35,688 You ain't really got shit to say, but they listen, and that's what I want. 155 00:10:35,690 --> 00:10:40,859 I want somebody to listen so I can teach them somethin'. 156 00:10:40,861 --> 00:10:45,175 Pryor, Richard! Dynamite, Black! 157 00:10:45,176 --> 00:10:47,333 You made bail! 158 00:10:47,335 --> 00:10:51,036 We bad. We bad. That's right, mothafucker, we bad. 159 00:10:51,638 --> 00:10:53,972 I just peed on myself! 160 00:10:56,091 --> 00:10:59,011 - What's this? - 'Bout 200 kilos' worth of money. 161 00:10:59,013 --> 00:11:02,815 I thought all that brinks truck talk was just one of your little funnies, 162 00:11:02,817 --> 00:11:05,418 - Richard Pryor. - Man, I told your ass ... I don't joke. 163 00:11:05,420 --> 00:11:09,388 How 'bout I pay your tax bill, you look the other way, and we both get to walk away with a 164 00:11:09,390 --> 00:11:12,758 - cool little story to tell? - I can't do that, Richard Pryor. 165 00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:16,329 Black Dynamite don't ever break his words. Black Dynamite's words and 166 00:11:16,331 --> 00:11:21,934 Black Dynamite's balls is all Black Dynamite has in this life. That, plus my bitches, my car, 167 00:11:21,936 --> 00:11:26,805 an exquisite wardrobe, and a bunch of more, other shit...but my point is, Black Dynamite 168 00:11:26,807 --> 00:11:31,043 said he would get Richard Pryor live on the Sunset Strip, and that's exactly what I'm gonna do. 169 00:11:31,045 --> 00:11:35,681 A'ight, man. I can dig it. Keep your word and your balls. 170 00:11:35,683 --> 00:11:38,618 - Oh fuck! Is that the I.R.S.?! - I thought I told you 171 00:11:38,620 --> 00:11:42,588 internal revenue mothafuckers, that Black Dynamite was gonna get your money! 172 00:11:42,590 --> 00:11:45,559 I'm workin' on it! 173 00:11:46,561 --> 00:11:51,952 - What about my taxes, Richard Pryor?! - You better get you some scratch-offs, sucker! 174 00:11:52,073 --> 00:11:55,868 ♪ Dynamite! Dynamite! 175 00:12:00,012 --> 00:12:03,737 Man, crazy rich done busted loose with all of that money, and he can be 176 00:12:03,739 --> 00:12:07,441 - anywhere by now. And that shit ain't funny. - Tomorrow's the 177 00:12:07,443 --> 00:12:10,344 15th, and the I.R.S. has threatened to put a lien on this Whorephanage. 178 00:12:10,346 --> 00:12:12,713 - What we gon' do?! - Look here, Honey Bee. 179 00:12:12,715 --> 00:12:17,260 Ain't nobody leanin' on Black Dynamite's whores or his orphans. Can you dig it? 180 00:12:17,295 --> 00:12:20,175 Which reminds me, I promised to drop my mama's 1099s off at the 181 00:12:20,176 --> 00:12:23,056 post office. Hey, Black Dynamite, they didn't repossess your ride yet, did they? 182 00:12:24,354 --> 00:12:27,060 - I'll just walk. - Maybe I can get the girls to stop suckin' and 183 00:12:27,062 --> 00:12:29,696 - fuckin' for an hour, and they can find Richard Pryor. - Nah, let them 184 00:12:29,698 --> 00:12:32,666 keep suckin' and fuckin', Honey Bee. I've been to every hot spot, 185 00:12:32,668 --> 00:12:36,117 cathouse, nightclub, drug spot, and gambling den in town. 186 00:12:36,250 --> 00:12:39,072 - And...? - He's been in every last one of them. 187 00:12:39,074 --> 00:12:42,309 Wait, Black Dynamite! There's someone I know that can 188 00:12:42,311 --> 00:12:46,585 help us find Richard Pryor and get him to the show. 189 00:12:48,584 --> 00:12:50,944 Richard's not here. What do you want? 190 00:12:51,320 --> 00:12:54,087 - How did you know ... - I know you've got a Richard Pryor problem, 'cause no one 191 00:12:54,089 --> 00:12:57,424 shows up to Paul Mooney's pad unannounced unless they've got a Richard Pryor problem. 192 00:12:57,426 --> 00:13:00,427 I've been livin' in that brother's light-skinned shadow all of my life. 193 00:13:00,429 --> 00:13:04,298 - Can you help us find him? - Is a pig's shit pork? 194 00:13:06,116 --> 00:13:10,714 - Where did you last see him? - In a brinks truck filled with 2 million big ones. 195 00:13:10,749 --> 00:13:12,506 That's what I was afraid of. You were trying to get him to 196 00:13:12,508 --> 00:13:15,742 the Sunset Strip, weren't you? 197 00:13:15,744 --> 00:13:19,680 You see, Richard thinks that if he goes to the Sunset Strip, then all he'll ever be is one of 198 00:13:19,682 --> 00:13:23,049 the greatest comedians that ever lived. Richard wants more than that. 199 00:13:23,051 --> 00:13:25,135 He wants to be like Malcolm X. 200 00:13:25,136 --> 00:13:27,220 See? That's the problem. 201 00:13:27,222 --> 00:13:32,166 Well, besides being a comedy man that nobody will ever take serious, what's stopping him? 202 00:13:32,201 --> 00:13:34,866 You mean, besides the cocaine, the quaaludes, valium, white women, 203 00:13:34,867 --> 00:13:37,531 mother issues, father issues, racism, vodka, pork shit and fame? 204 00:13:37,533 --> 00:13:40,534 - That don't cover it? - Richard's got that shit 205 00:13:40,536 --> 00:13:44,471 and that shinola. You can't have shinola without the shit. 206 00:13:44,473 --> 00:13:47,307 Because the truth lives in the shit, the shit is where you find wisdom. 207 00:13:47,309 --> 00:13:49,843 The shit is what reminds you that your shit stinks. 208 00:13:49,845 --> 00:13:54,781 - It keeps your feet on the ground. - Paul Mooney, you 209 00:13:54,783 --> 00:13:59,409 might sound deep, but you look jungle fuckin' loony. 210 00:14:11,208 --> 00:14:13,729 Man, what the hell are we doing out here with... 211 00:14:13,731 --> 00:14:17,265 - Paul Mooney, anyway? - Wait, wait! 212 00:14:17,267 --> 00:14:20,703 I smell something cooking... cocaine... 213 00:14:20,705 --> 00:14:24,539 ...and a man's flesh. It's him! 214 00:14:24,541 --> 00:14:26,990 There goes Richard Pryor! 215 00:14:27,145 --> 00:14:31,598 He's naked and literally on fire! 216 00:14:34,418 --> 00:14:36,585 He went that way! 217 00:14:36,587 --> 00:14:40,411 - It's time to break out the heavy weapons. - What's that? 218 00:14:40,558 --> 00:14:44,066 All of Richard's greatest hits ... cocaine, vodka tonic, and white-woman saliva. 219 00:14:44,146 --> 00:14:47,113 He's responded well to these in the past when all else has failed. 220 00:14:47,176 --> 00:14:49,698 Oh fuck! 221 00:14:49,700 --> 00:14:53,301 Why... are... you... doing... 222 00:14:53,303 --> 00:14:56,438 - this... to... me?! - False alarm. He's not Richard Pryor. 223 00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:59,908 You think Richard Pryor's the only basehead to ever catch on fire, man? 224 00:14:59,910 --> 00:15:04,511 - Then why did you run, basehead? - I was on fire, man! I was about 225 00:15:04,546 --> 00:15:08,817 to put myself out, and then you mothafuckers started chasin' me. 226 00:15:08,819 --> 00:15:11,237 What the hell was I supposed to do? 227 00:15:11,950 --> 00:15:13,656 Oh fuck, that's my accountant. 228 00:15:13,658 --> 00:15:16,575 Did you guys know that taxes were due by midnight tonight? 229 00:15:16,639 --> 00:15:18,446 I got to fly. 230 00:15:18,513 --> 00:15:21,584 ♪ Dynamite! Dynamite! ♪ 231 00:15:24,383 --> 00:15:28,621 Donald, you were more than just an accountant. 232 00:15:28,623 --> 00:15:33,659 You were my accountant. But now, you're just a dead accountant lying in this grave. 233 00:15:33,661 --> 00:15:37,329 If I could do it all over again, I would've made time to talk to you. 234 00:15:37,331 --> 00:15:41,433 I would've filed quarterly and kept my business and personal receipts separate. 235 00:15:41,435 --> 00:15:46,705 I cannot bring you back to life, but I can come back and engrave "avenged" on your tombstone. 236 00:15:46,707 --> 00:15:50,609 30 minutes to showtime, Black Dynamite. You got your tickets. 237 00:15:50,611 --> 00:15:55,120 I've got mine. If you don't have our money, you'll be sleeping 238 00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:59,630 with the fishes, right here, beside Donald ... in the dirt. 239 00:15:59,672 --> 00:16:02,587 Black Dynamite ain't never slept with a fish or laid in a grave 240 00:16:02,588 --> 00:16:05,503 in his whole life, and he damn sure ain't gonna start now! 241 00:16:05,538 --> 00:16:09,595 Go on. Shoot, Black Dynamite. 242 00:16:09,597 --> 00:16:13,265 Kill me, and two more agents will pop up in my place. And if you kill those two 243 00:16:13,267 --> 00:16:16,535 agents, four more will take over for them. Kill those 4, and you'll find 244 00:16:16,537 --> 00:16:19,706 yourself dealing with 8. Waste those 8, now you've got 16 I.R.S. 245 00:16:19,707 --> 00:16:22,875 agents following you wherever you go. Go ahead and kill those 16... 246 00:16:22,992 --> 00:16:25,306 Cream Corn? Honey Bee? Bullhorn? 247 00:16:25,307 --> 00:16:28,779 The I.R.S. honky is right. Ain't but two things certain in this world ... 248 00:16:28,814 --> 00:16:32,184 we're gonna be taxed by the I.R.S. and we're gonna be kill by the I.R.S. 249 00:16:32,186 --> 00:16:36,288 We might as well go back to the Whorephanage, board up the windows, give everybody assault 250 00:16:36,290 --> 00:16:40,492 - rifles, and wait for the final shootout. - ...4 and 64 equals 128, and 251 00:16:40,494 --> 00:16:44,110 do you know what 128 times 2 is? 256! 252 00:16:44,111 --> 00:16:49,534 All... up... in... your...ass, Black Dynamite! 253 00:16:56,897 --> 00:17:00,746 - Wait. I hear something. - That was some serious shit. 254 00:17:00,748 --> 00:17:04,850 It sounds like... shit being talked. 255 00:17:04,852 --> 00:17:08,087 It was at Hershey bar. Fuckin' around and ate 256 00:17:08,089 --> 00:17:11,790 the mothafucker smelled like I had a fuckin' sandwich for breakfast. 257 00:17:11,792 --> 00:17:14,192 Hey, baby, can I get a swig? 258 00:17:14,194 --> 00:17:20,565 You think you got problems? I had a brinks truck with $2 million 48 hours ago, 259 00:17:20,567 --> 00:17:26,171 and I bet you were sitting in the same shit you're sitting in now. 260 00:17:28,847 --> 00:17:34,146 Man, you right, Richard, man. I am sittin' in shit but you make us feel like we 261 00:17:34,148 --> 00:17:38,117 ain't sittin' in shit no matter how much shit we're sittin' in. 262 00:17:38,119 --> 00:17:41,787 - That's fuckin' crazy. - Look at him. All he's got is his dirty 263 00:17:41,789 --> 00:17:47,225 drawers, his half-skunked jug of wine, and you, Richard Pryor. Well, mothafucker that 264 00:17:47,227 --> 00:17:51,830 reminds me... a funny thing happened while I was gone. I gambled away $2 million ... 265 00:17:51,832 --> 00:17:56,434 plus 4 more in I.O.U.S ... to some kung fu gangsters from Chinatown. 266 00:17:56,436 --> 00:17:58,829 And they want to kick my ass. 267 00:17:58,894 --> 00:18:01,473 Richard Pryor! 268 00:18:01,475 --> 00:18:06,523 You in big trouble with little Chinatown gang. 269 00:18:06,558 --> 00:18:09,181 - Oh fuck! - Richard Pryor, 270 00:18:09,183 --> 00:18:14,086 I'm gonna get you live on the Sunset Strip, and then I'm gonna kill you dead. 271 00:18:14,088 --> 00:18:16,239 Mothafucker. Run, boy! 272 00:18:21,077 --> 00:18:24,040 - Oh, my god! It's Richard Pryor! - What?! 273 00:18:24,075 --> 00:18:29,401 - Richard, cut it out! - One thing I know how to do is run! 274 00:18:33,559 --> 00:18:35,238 Suey! 275 00:18:48,287 --> 00:18:50,683 - Suey! - Fuck, get me down! 276 00:18:51,684 --> 00:18:53,243 Suey! Suey! 277 00:18:53,244 --> 00:18:56,595 Suey! 278 00:18:59,699 --> 00:19:03,421 Hey, little fat troll! Oh! There you are! 279 00:19:03,534 --> 00:19:08,073 I heard you wanted Richard Pryor live on the Sunset Strip. Well, here I is. 280 00:19:08,075 --> 00:19:11,376 - You think this is funny? - Actually, I do, mothafucker. 281 00:19:11,378 --> 00:19:14,512 I took care of that gambling debt for you, Richard Pryor. 282 00:19:14,514 --> 00:19:17,850 Those kung fu gangsters from Chinatown won't be bothering you no more. 283 00:19:17,852 --> 00:19:21,253 I'm not paying you to deal with kung fu gangsters from Chinatown. 284 00:19:21,255 --> 00:19:25,323 If you ever want to work in Hollywood again, Black Dynamite, I advise you to do your job! 285 00:19:25,325 --> 00:19:29,494 - You're my mercenary ... all mine! - Now, you wait a minute, Mr. Movie producer. 286 00:19:29,496 --> 00:19:33,098 I got Richard here, just like I said I would. Whether he gets up on stage is 287 00:19:33,100 --> 00:19:36,736 up to him and his cocaine. So I suggest you give him a break, 'cause 288 00:19:36,737 --> 00:19:40,372 he's been dealin' with a lot of heavy on his mind. Can you dig? 289 00:19:40,373 --> 00:19:43,021 Look, Richard! We got your inspiration! 290 00:19:43,056 --> 00:19:46,845 - Come and get it! - My main man! 291 00:19:46,847 --> 00:19:51,516 No! Cocaine is not your main man, Richard Pryor! 292 00:19:51,518 --> 00:19:55,520 Fine! So be it. You think you're the first incredibly talented person of 293 00:19:55,522 --> 00:20:00,292 color to take show business by storm, only to be driven insane by the pressures of a system 294 00:20:00,294 --> 00:20:04,263 that's designed to suck them dry and leave them dead in a heap of cocaine?! 295 00:20:04,265 --> 00:20:08,300 - Well, you won't be the last! - He's right! Man, it's hopeless, man. 296 00:20:08,302 --> 00:20:10,769 - I'm-a jump! - Don't jump, man! 297 00:20:10,771 --> 00:20:14,965 Oh fuck, fuck what I just said, Richard Pryor! 298 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:17,375 - Jump! Jump!! - What? 299 00:20:17,377 --> 00:20:21,446 Oh fuck! Why didn't somebody tell me I was on fire?! 300 00:20:21,448 --> 00:20:22,873 Suey! 301 00:20:22,912 --> 00:20:25,539 ♪ Dynamite! Dynamite! 302 00:20:25,921 --> 00:20:28,429 Very dramatic. Very touching. If you don't get 303 00:20:28,430 --> 00:20:32,191 on that stage now, I swear to god I will personally see to it that you 304 00:20:32,193 --> 00:20:37,930 and everything you ever worked for comes crashing down! 305 00:20:39,850 --> 00:20:42,652 Burn, Hollywood! Burn! Ha ha! 306 00:20:42,687 --> 00:20:45,470 Get it? Burn! Ha ha! 307 00:20:45,472 --> 00:20:49,407 - Hy-sterical. - Smashed honky is not hy-sterical. 308 00:20:49,409 --> 00:20:51,810 But it is funny. 309 00:20:51,811 --> 00:20:56,448 Look, Richard Pryor, at first, I didn't get you or your comedy jokes. 310 00:20:56,450 --> 00:21:00,552 Even though the whole world is laughin' at you, just know that Black Dynamite 311 00:21:00,554 --> 00:21:03,322 - takes you seriously. - Here. You earned this, Black Dynamite. 312 00:21:03,324 --> 00:21:07,525 - That's why it's called mercenary work. - Thank you, Black Dynamite. 313 00:21:07,527 --> 00:21:12,197 That takes care of your federal, but the city and state will be by this afternoon to get theirs, 314 00:21:12,199 --> 00:21:16,668 - and they're not as nice as us! - No, that's hy-sterical. 315 00:21:16,670 --> 00:21:20,339 Mothafuckers thanks, y'all. Maybe I should be grateful for 316 00:21:20,341 --> 00:21:22,574 my blessin's. Maybe big muscles aren't everything. 317 00:21:22,576 --> 00:21:26,644 Well, now you're just talkin' crazy, Richard Pryor. 318 00:21:29,507 --> 00:21:32,617 I have a feeling that little comedy man's gonna inspire 319 00:21:32,619 --> 00:21:36,688 a whole generation of nobodies to be somebodies. And when that happens... 320 00:21:36,690 --> 00:21:39,224 My main man! Cocaine! 321 00:21:40,421 --> 00:21:43,289 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~ 30954

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