All language subtitles for 800.Bullets.2002.720p.BluRay.x264-.YTS.LT

- Jump!
- What are you doing?

- Oh, my God!
- What are you doing?

Help me!

Give me your hand!

Give me your hand!

Your hand!
Give me your hand!

Where the hell
is the stunt coordinator?

I said, where the hell
is the stunt coordinator?

Juli�n!

Juli�n!

800 BULLETS

Hey, Sergio,
how are you?

No, I can't
talk to you now.

Be quiet, Carlos!

Why don't you tell
my secretary?

She can check my diary

and we'll meet
next week.

No, the week after.

No, I've got a bunch
of clumsy idiots.

They're going to wreck
all my furniture.

But, you know,
that's how it is.

What about
the Argentineans?

You know
what they're like.

Tell them
I'll call them tomorrow,

or sort it out yourself.

Carlos, stop
running around, love.

He'll poke
someone's eye out.

I said he was too young
for that toy

but as no one
ever listens to me...

Then say
something to him.

No, I'm not his mother!

Carlos, help
those gentlemen.

Yes?

I can hardly hear you.

We'll talk later.

I didn't want to come.

You've said that
20 times!

This house is shit,
it doesn't have a pool.

All that money
on private schools

and he swears
like a trooper.

Careful, that's
Bohemian crystal!

Can't you see?
It says "Fragile"!

Come here, child!

Fucking kid!

You little shit!
If I could get...!

If I catch you... If
your father were alive,

he'd give you
a good thrashing,

you little devil!

Unfaithful dog!

The little creep!

The contract says
four bathrooms, four,

not three bathrooms
and a shower room.

What? No, no,
a shower room

is always
a shower room.

It's got a shower
and a toilet.

What do you want?

This is my day off.

- We've got it.
- What have we got?

The answer
to everything.

They can't beat us now.

Is that
what I think it is?

The Belgians' offer.

It's got everything.

The launch,
merchandising,

the plan of the park,

and, most important,
the price.

Now we've really got
them by the balls!

- How did you do it?
- Easy.

I sent someone
to Belgium.

He broke
into their office,

stole this disk
and brought it to me

for 120,000 Euros.

120,000 Euros?

You're joking.

You think it's expensive
or cheap?

I think it's outrageous
to act like that.

Should I return it?

Shut up!

It's excellent.
Look at the terrain.

It's better than ours.

And cheaper.

200 million less.
Dollars, eh? Not Euros.

If we cut out
your salary...

Very funny.

But there's one thing
they can't hide.

What is it?

And the Americans
want sun.

They lost millions
in Paris

with that water-logged
EuroDisney.

That's where
we hit them!

We cut our budget
by 250 million

and sell them the sun.

A blazing sun!

Spanish sun!

Long live Islam!

Down with the West!

Laura!

You're going to die!

Carlos, come down!
He'll kill himself.

Die, grandma!

He'll be the death of us!

Can't you watch him
for five minutes?

Your child is a monster!

Carlos, come down,
darling!

You'll hurt yourself!

It's in his blood.

You know who I mean.

One day there'll be
a disaster.

Don't say that again.

Ever!

MOM

Who's this man
dressed as a cowboy?

Is your grandma asleep?

Since the film started.

Turn off the TV
and go to bed.

I've got a lot to do.

Where did you get that?

Give it to me.

And leave
my things alone.

It's daddy, isn't it?
It's dad.

Carlos...

Give me that, I said!

Why is he dressed
as a cowboy?

It was a fancy dress
party. Give it to me!

Why did you never
show it to me?

Because...
Because I didn't.

Give it to me.

If you take
anything of mine

again without asking

you'll have no holiday!

You never talk
about him.

- Because he's dead.
- I know that.

He died in an accident,
you told me 1,000 times.

But you never tell me
anything else.

It isn't a nice story
to tell.

Stories end happily, and
this one ended badly.

Go to your room.

God, I've got
my headache back.

Come here.

Give me a kiss.

I loved him very much.

Very much.

"Two Rifles
and A Grave"

That's your grandpa.

Shit, grandma,
don't do that!

Your grandpa and your
dad made westerns.

Come off it!

"I'll Go, Kill Him
and Come Back."

"Two Bullets
For Charlie."

They were all
dreadful films,

but they laughed
so much!

Anything
so as not to work.

Your grandpa
was a lazy rascal.

Like you.
Look at him.

And dad?

Your dad
was a simple soul.

He couldn't say no.

If dad hadn't died,

I'd have been born
in America.

In America?

That's Almeria.
In America, he says!

Your granddad
never went

further than Portugal.

He's probably in some

fly-ridden bar
down there.

Is he still alive?

If your mother hears me,
she'll kill me.

I swear I'll say nothing.

Is he still there,
in Almeria?

I didn't say anything.

Don't dare mention him

in front of your mother,
you hear?

May I keep the photo?

Get up, you're late
and the bus won't wait.

Have you packed
your bag?

What bag?

You'll need
spare clothes.

Give me another
five minutes.

In five seconds,

I want you downstairs
having breakfast.

- Got your cell phone?
- Yes.

I tapped in the numbers
of the house, the office,

and my secretary's
house.

If anything happens,
I'll call.

Here.

Take this.

In case you need money.

Here, the code
is in the cell phone.

It's only
for an emergency.

You shouldn't
give him that.

If it gets stolen...

It'll just make
things worse.

What use is ten Euros?

Don't drive me crazy,
Rocio, for God's sake.

You'll regret it later.

That's enough.

They're just kids
going to the snow.

- See you.
- Give me a kiss.

Behave yourself. Do
everything you're told.

If they offer you pills
or joints

or anything like that,
you know...

Say yes,
and spit it out.

Yeah, grandma.

You shouldn't have
given him that card.

You have to make a
drama of everything.

He's going to a ski
camp, not to Vietnam!

How little you love me.

You wouldn't talk
to your mother like that.

I talk to everyone
like that.

Since my son died,

I'm a nobody.

- What did you tell him?
- Me? Nothing.

Don't lie to me,
I'm not stupid.

You'll have
to tell him some day.

Think about
how you'll do it.

Drop it, or you won't

set foot
in my house again.

I won't drop it.
He's my grandson!

If you've
told him anything,

I'll send you
to an old folks home.

And there are no
sun beds there.

That's too bad.

I'm sorry
about your grandma.

Yes, she's got cancer.

I have to go
to the hospital.

Well, I hope
she gets better.

- Where are we going?
- Almeria.

Where?

To the province
of Almeria.

How much will it cost?

Fuck knows!
Let's see.

Ten years ago, it was
20,000 to go to Asturias.

Now it would be
about 70,000.

420 Euros, at least.

Is this enough?

Listen, you're not in
trouble, are you?

I don't want any hassle
because of you.

No, I'm going
to a shoot.

A film shoot?

Yes, my grandpa
is an actor. In Almeria.

"Two Rifles
and A Grave".

With "Bob Dereck".
Fucking hell.

Your grandpa and "Bob
Dereck". Lucky devil!

He's made over 50 films.

Actors are always
getting it.

My cousin is one
and he told me.

You know the ad

for removing grease
without scrubbing?

My cousin is the grease.

The grease?

And he played
a cockroach once.

In an ad for insecticide.
What an actor!

My grandpa works
with Americans.

Shit, that must be
one hell of a life.

Orgies every other day.

You sure it's here?

Maybe they've stopped
for lunch.

See? What did I say?
Spielberg.

Yeah,
but today's Sunday.

He won't be here.

So I think I'll be off.

I want to get back
in daylight. Here, kid.

What about the extras?

No, I'm in no mood
for an orgy today.

Say hello
to your grandpa for me.

You've got my card
if you need me.

Ten Euros.

Do I have to pay?

If you want to go in,
you sure do.

When does
the show start?

- It depends.
- On what?

If there are people,

they do the show.
If not, why bother?

In any case,

I have to be here.

Whether they do it or
not, I have to be here.

Just in case.

Some Germans
have gone in,

so they'll do it today.

- So long.
- Yeah, have fun.

Kid, get out of the way!

Get out of town,
Cheyenne!

We don't want you here!

I don't talk to pigs!

Can you repeat
what you just said?

I don't talk to pigs!

I didn't hear you
properly, Cheyenne.

Say it again.

Fuck, I don't talk
to pigs.

I'm going to do it well.
I will, I will, I will.

It was all a trap.

You came here
like a friend

but you just wanted
to betray me!

That star is going
to be mine, sheriff.

It's my destiny.

Damn!

The indians!

We're alone now.

Your time has come.

Shoot,
you damn coward!

Cheyenne, you're so
ugly you made him cry.

Five little wolf cubs...

Ladies and Gentlemen!

Tomorrow,
at the same time,

a new show
in the wonderful

Texas Hollywood!

For only ten Euros,

you can experience
the real American West.

A dream come true

for the whole family!

I'm telling you,
that's the last time.

Fucking Coca-Cola
cans!

And I'd swept
the ground three times.

Get up, Manuel.

Come on, on your feet.

You all right?

Great, I didn't feel
a thing.

- Did it look realistic?
- You're terrific.

I didn't use my hands
because it looks false.

Fucking great!
That's the way I like it!

If only they all cared
as much as you do.

And some bastard
threw broken glass there.

It's no big deal.

They can drag you
the next time.

At your age, I was
doing it without a shirt.

They dragged me
from here to Almeria.

Afterwards,
I'd knock back

a few drinks
and that was that.

Hey, you bastards!
Get me down from here!

The show's over.
Come on, for crissake.

Look!

Whoever is happy
can stay.

Whoever isn't
can fuck off.

But stop
pissing me around.

I'm happy. I'm happy.

I'm happy. I'm happy.

- Give me a drink.
- Lf you pay.

Go on, and put it
on my slate.

Don Mariano says
no slate.

Give me a break
about Don Mariano.

And put on
your costume.

This looks
like a fishmonger's.

What about you?

Aren't you
working today?

Ma cazzo vuoi?

Have you started
already?

Ma va fan culo.
You tell me niente.

Were those
your Coca-Cola cans?

Juli�n,
we can't go on like this.

Nobody
comes anymore.

Yesterday,
we had two French,

today, five Germans, and
tomorrow, God knows.

There are more people

doing the show
than watching it.

Remember those
busloads of Japanese?

Madonna!

We haven't had any
Japanese in years.

They go to Seville now,
to the pirate show.

Yeah, there's a boat,
water...

Here, there's troppo
ma troppo calore.

And the food's great
in Seville.

It's not any better
than here.

I found a place
at the gas station...

No, the thing is,
they prepare their show,

they rehearse it.

They take it seriously,
they're professionals.

What do you mean,
professionals?

You know who you're
talking to?

I was double

for the two gutsiest guys
on the planet.

I drove the tank
in "Patton"

for George S. Scott

who won an Oscar
in Hollywood.

And now we'll
hear about

Clint Eastwood's
poncho.

Yeah, asshole, Clint
Eastwood's poncho.

I wore Clint Eastwood's
poncho

in "For a Few Dollars
More",

"A Fistful
Of Dollars" and

"The Good, the Bad
and the Ugly"

So don't talk
about professionals

or I'll smash your face.

I'll smash your face.

Chacho's broken
something!

Now what's wrong?

He fell badly
off the horse.

I'm not surprised. He's
fucking stoned all day.

Hang on.

It's nothing.

We should call
an ambulance.

Cut the drama. It's
nothing, for crissake.

Jacinta,
call Emergencies.

Jacinta,
you're not to move.

No ambulances.

We're not insured.

Nobody's covered,
we'd be in the shit.

Jacinta, call Don
Mariano. He's in charge.

When Don Mariano
isn't here,

I'm the one in charge.

This is a sprain,
that's all.

Well, do I call or not?

You'll all need
an ambulance

when I get down!

Shitheads!

Who's that?

I don't know, he was
with the Germans.

He got left behind.

That's all we needed.

- Sir...
- C'mere, kid.

Come up here.
Give me a hand.

Where are you going?

I'll try
to head them off.

- Sir...
- What about Chacho?

In the jail,
by my bunk

there's some
rheumatism ointment.

Give him some and see
if that sorts him out.

Sir, listen...

- Sir...
- Shut up, kid.

So long, Jos� Mar�a.

Juli�n!

Next time, he'll fucking
eat the sheriff's star!

You're all talk,
but then...

He shot at me
and you said nothin'.

- They were blanks.
- You couldn't care less.

Coochy, coochy,

who loves you
more than I do?

Coochy, my ass!

Keep your lousy hands
off me!

Someone get me down!

I'm fucking sick of this!

What do you bet
he gets something

for returning the kid?

Is this kid yours?

You left the boy behind.

I'm not German.

That's what
I've been telling you.

You're not? Then who
the hell are you?

Carlos Torralba. I think
I'm your grandson.

Sorry, I didn't
hear you properly.

I'm your grandson,
Laura's daughter!

All right, but you
don't have to shout.

Your mother isn't here,
is she?

No, she's in Madrid,
working.

But she knows
you're here.

No.

You haven't run away,
have you?

Not run away exactly.

I'm supposed to be
skiing with the school.

Fucking hell.

I just wanted
to meet you.

If it's a problem,
I'll clear off.

Yes, it is a problem,
and a big one.

If your mother finds out
she'll kill me.

She and I
don't get on very well.

She doesn't
talk much about you.

That's good.

Well, Carlos,

I'm delighted

to have met you.

Carry straight on

and you'll come
to the road.

Not this way. This leads
to the western town.

The real one is over
there, half an hour away.

Shit, don't
follow me, kid.

Grandma says
you're a lazy rascal.

Your grandma should
have died years ago.

She says that about you.

So we agree
on something.

We should both be dead.

I keep trying.

I drink whiskey,
kill Indians,

smoke three packs a day,

and I can't manage it.
I'm strong as an ox.

And that really
pisses some people.

Tell your grandma that.

Why don't they make
any more films?

There aren't any films
like in the old days.

I mean the good ones.

Now they're either
for old women

or full of
special effects rubbish.

They used to be about
Romans and submarines.

The submarine ones
were great.

The westerns were
the best.

I was number one, kid.

I made 50 films
as a stuntman,

and seven
with a line to say.

And I had to say them
in English!

I still remember.

And my father?

Your father...

Didn't I tell you
to clear off?

Will you get
the hell out of here?

Do you know
how my father died?

What did those
witches tell you?

Nothing, I swear.

Did they say
I killed him?

Grandma said
it was an accident.

I had nothing to do
with it.

- You're hurting me!
- I wasn't even there!

You're hurting me!

Christ, the German!

What's up? Did your
parents abandon you?

Get in, or the wolves
will eat you!

I've got a wooden box
in here

that's just your size.

You bastards!
Come on, get in.

Have you all worked
in films?

They say they have,

but I think
they've never seen

a camera in their lives.

Juli�n has. He was a
stuntman for the stars.

He was Clint
Eastwood's double.

They were real buddies.

Yeah, real buddies,
my ass!

He did leave his poncho.

So why are you here?

I ask myself that
every day, kid.

The gallows are more
fun than a scaffolding.

Gravedigger,
tell him your story.

Lay off, at least
I had a contract.

A contract!

He came here
to work in a

spaghetti western
and it started raining!

They cancelled the shoot

and there was
no more spaghetti!

There were floods

for the first time
in fifty years!

Porca miseria schifosa!

Hooligans!

Snacks and Meals
COWBO YS BAR

Do you hear me?

Boots off the table

or I'll unplug
the satellite dish.

Shit, she doesn't
even own the place.

God knows
what possessed you

to get into this
western business.

You'd be better
off here with me.

Juli, I'd be no good
at catering.

I'm an actor.

A what?

Falling out a window
is acting?

What I do is different,
Julita.

I've got dialogue,
a text.

Let me see.

"Give me a whiskey,
Joe."

That's dialogue?

' Watch out, the
confederates are coming.'

Look at how you said it.

If you say it
as badly as that,

even Shakespeare is shit.

For your information,

I've had offers.

What offers?

I was offered a splendid
part in a play.

I didn't tell you because
you don't approve.

So what is it?

It's a world famous
show.

It's been a hit
everywhere.

They're setting it up
now in Almeria.

The Hall of Horror?

What's wrong?

It's a very decent show.

I wouldn't do
any old thing.

You know who I'd be,
kid?

I'd be Dracula.

King Kong
would suit you better.

Let's go see a film.

I'm watching the game
with this lot.

Do you always have
to follow the others?

You don't like soccer.

I like being here
for a while,

having a beer,
the atmosphere...

Atmosphere.

We've had seven years
of atmosphere.

One of these days

I'll take my stuff
and clear out.

Can I pay with Visa?

What are you doing?
Be careful with that.

The world is full
of thieves

who'd do anything.

I bet you don't
even know the number.

What is it?

Don't you dare!

It was for the boy's
own good.

It's on the house. You
can stay here tonight,

but tomorrow
you're going home.

Your mother'll be
worried.

Don't be like that.
Tomorrow

we'll take the car
and go visit a mall.

Pass the ball, man!
Pass it!

He's a halfwit!

A halfwit!

It isn't your fault.

Your wife
and daughter-in-law

filled the boy's head
with lies.

That's right, lies.

I didn't do anything.

I'm a good person.

Don't you think
I'm a good person?

You've got
a heart of gold.

Come on,
eat your omelet.

I'd never hurt anyone,

least of all my own son.

Everyone here
knows that.

No, not everyone.

And now that kid
has turned up.

And he's scared of me.

- Your grandson?
- Yes.

He thinks

that I killed his father.

Christ Almighty!

Watch it, grandpa!

I'm not
your fucking grandpa.

Leave him, he's drunk.

I'll be whatever I want,
shithead!

Take it easy.

We're here
for a bit of fun.

At my expense!

I saw you laughing
behind my back.

You haven't a clue.

Watching the fucking
television!

You faggots
wouldn't know

what to do
with a whore!

People come here
to fuck!

And you're fucking us.

Juli�n, leave them be.

You're going to eat
your tie!

These are for real,

not like the ones
in your lousy films.

Juli�n, are you
all right?

Yeah, of course I am.
This is what I work at.

All those years
of broken ribs

and smashed teeth
were of some use.

It's nothing.
I'm a professional, see?

I'm on my feet again,
good as new.

What's your name?

Sandra.

Where have you been
hiding?

Go on, go with her. It's
on the house tonight.

You think that...?

Now that you
mention it,

I could do
with a lie-down.

Come on.

'Evening,
Don Mariano.

Have you done
the till yet?

Hurry up, I still have
to close the video club.

- They're like tourists.
- They won't run.

Why are they here?

I don't want to see them

until they've paid
their bills.

I've got everything
written down.

Goal!
Athletic! Athletic!

What's up with him?

Nothing. Now he says
he's from Bilbao.

Throwing yourself
out of windows

isn't good for the brain.

The other day
he arrived in shorts.

He said he was hot.

Forgetting to get dressed
is bad,

but saying
he's from Bilbao...

I'm not saying it. I am.

From the heart
of Bilbao,

the greatest place
in the world.

The Guggenheim,
the hanging bridge,

the "txacolin"...

Look, Manuel.

Can't you hear yourself
when you talk?

What?

You've got
an Andalusian accent.

You were born in Cadiz.

Your father
is from Chipiona.

Your mother
is from Barbate.

You like paella,
flamenco...

At fifteen, you wanted
to be a bullfighter.

No, no, that's
impossible.

I'm "abertzale",
for crissake!

Arzalluz, Julen
Guerrero, cod "pil-pil".

That's my world!

You women
are so pretty.

Christ Almighty.

Where did you say
you came from?

Logro�o.

Shit, I thought you were

Cuban or something,
but Logro�o...

No, I worked for three
years in Logro�o.

Before that,
I was in Tudela,

Laguardia,
Miranda de Ebro...

Miranda de Ebro
is beautiful.

A friend of mine in the
Legion was from there.

Andr�s...
Do you know him?

Andr�s?

It doesn't ring a bell.

- It doesn't?
- No.

That's odd, because he
liked whoring around.

He's a Civil Guard now.

Listen...

You don't mind,
do you?

It's just that
I'm feeling a bit sleepy.

No, sweetheart.

Don't worry.

You go to sleep.
I'll stay here.

Listen, don't tell
anyone, eh?

Tell them what?

Nothing's happened.

Precisely. And that's
what you mustn't say.

That nothing happened.

Tell those people
to go away.

I'm getting
in a bad mood.

All this fucking show.

He isn't there.

Hey, you bastards!
If we're not

going to start,
take me down!

Cheyenne!

Niente. He isn't in the
saloon, or in the bank.

I even checked
the stables.

What about the camels?

Sometimes he sleeps
in with them.

Look, he isn't here!

We have to do
something!

People are waiting!

Everyone stay calm.
We mustn't panic.

I'll see to everything.

Are you there?

What are you doing?

Someone has to take
charge.

He's here!

Do you hear?

Nobody fucking listens!

Where am I?

In Kansas City,
dickhead!

The Germans
have been waiting

for the sheriff,
so get a move on!

Didn't I tell you
to go away?

Let me stay, please.
Just for a few days.

Don't you
understand me?

I told you to disappear.
I don't want to see you.

But why?

Because I fucking say so!

Bring me a blanket!

Jacinta, get the truck
and take him into town.

He's not to miss the bus.

Now, let's see
if we can start working.

Put this on, it fell off.

Hey, I'm waiting
for the signal!

Let's try to do it right,
one thing at a time,

not all at once,
for crissake.

Bring cigarettes!

Move the fucking car!
You're ruining the show!

I'm not in the mood
for this shit.

Not now, Manuel.

Was that realistic?

Very realistic, but give
us a minute. Get lost.

You know why
I'm here.

You? To screw us up,
as usual.

The Germans are
roasting in the sun

and you come
barging in.

I've got no time
for jokes.

Just hand over the stuff
or I'll go after it.

What are you
talking about?

You asked for it.

Andr�s, where
are you going?

There's nothing
to see in there.

What's the combination?

It's made of wood,
for crissake.

El�as...

You lot, stand there
where I can see you.

Shit, a ham!

What's this?

I've never seen it
before.

What is it, anyway?

- We've given up drugs.
- Like hell you have.

Who the fuck
tipped you off?

I'm not naming names.

There are at least 15
kilos of hash in there.

It's for personal
consumption.

- With the family.
- Right.

Tell that to the judge!

Come on.

Get moving.

We haven't done
anything!

Bastard!
It's your business,

I only get a share.

I never knew that.

This doesn't happen
in Bilbao.

You shouldn't have
handcuffed me.

What'll people say?

They wanted a show,
didn't they?

You'll leave us all
without a job,

that's what you'll do.

Pay the bail.

With what?
The hash?

Find something.

Shit, the fuzz.

Holy Mary,
Mother of God,

pray for us sinners,
now and...

If I'd thumped you
in the Legion,

you wouldn't do
this to me now.

Don't start on
about the old days.

I do as I'm told.
The captain

wants to get rid
of any junkies or...

Or trippers.

Well, you've got
enough of those.

Take my picture and I'll
book you, foreign shit!

Come on, get in there.
Come on!

They've gone.

And now how the hell

do we pay
the fucking bail?

Hey! Driver!
Stop!

Stop! Stop!
Stop the bus!

Stop the bus!
Stop the bus!

You have to come
with me.

Your grandpa's been
arrested

and we have
to bail him out.

You must have dropped
it in the bar.

If we'd known
the number

we wouldn't
have bothered you.

This is my goddamn
grandson.

Let's celebrate.

Let's raise hell,
like in the old days.

What about the indians?

They're not
getting out yet.

This country
is like that.

The judge
wants to ask them

about some
radio cassettes...

Are we having the party
without them?

Listen to me.

There are some really
shitty moments in life.

A lot more
than you'd think.

Nobody can
prevent them.

You have to make

the most of the time
in between them.

Not enjoying yourself
when you can

is the greatest sin
in the world.

Hell!

I've just remembered
something.

What?

We left Jos� Mar�a
up there again.

Somebody
will let him down.

Who's Jos� Mar�a?

The hanged man.

Bastards.

- Wait a minute.
- Where are you going?

To hire some talent!

'Afternoon, gentlemen!

Good afternoon!

Would any of you
be willing to work

in the wonderful world
of show business?

What the hell's
going on?

This is what you call
an audition!

We wanted indians,
right?

Well, we've got them!

Bastards!

This is a free country.

If these gentlemen
want to play the fool,

you just shut your face.

Now, listen.

You have to learn this
off by heart.

A pair, a double pair,

three of a kind,
full house,

straight flush, poker

and royal flush.
Got that?

Aren't face cards
better than a full house?

Don't distract me.

Professionals never play
with face cards.

You don't want to play
with the queen.

Why?

She's a pain in the ass.

She wants you
home early,

she gets angry if you
play with other cards,

and you always
end up cheating,

like I did
with your grandma.

Why are you
telling the kid that?

Because it's true.

It's better
he finds out now.

Your grandma and I
had a ball together,

until it ended.

Do you never want
to see her again?

Yes, of course I do.

When I'm dead!

Don't listen to him.
Your grandpa is a flirt.

In my place,

I've got lots of clients

who are happy
with their wives.

Your father was
a good poker player.

No one saw how he hid
the cards up his sleeve.

Look, Carlos,

I never loved anyone
more than your father.

We were inseparable,

until he married
your mother.

She didn't like
him being a stuntman.

She said he could do
better. She was right.

Your father
was very smart.

He could've been

whatever the hell
he wanted.

We were going through
a bad spell here.

They'd started
with all that shit

about spaceships
and galaxies.

It seemed nobody
was going

to make a western again,

much less in Almeria.

Then that guy
they called

the Russian turned up.

Because he drank vodka,
right?

No, because he was
from Moscow.

He had money.
He swapped whores

and caviar
for porn videos

that he sold on the black
market in St. Petersburg.

Anyway, he wanted
to make a film

and he wanted the best.

So he called me.

And I called your father.

You know
what happened?

No.

Tell him.

He came back
to Almeria,

back to the west
with his father!

You just had to see
the smile on his face

to know that this
was his world.

He was very good.

Much better than me.

He was afraid
of nothing.

He was afraid
of nobody.

I don't know
what happened.

I don't know
what went wrong.

We'd rehearsed it
so often...

What the hell!

Come on!
What's going on here?

All you whores...

Start dancing,
like in the west!

What are you
looking at?

Come on.

If you want,
you can touch my tit.

No, that's not
how you do it.

That's how you call
an elevator.

Look.

You have to feel
its weight.

Just imagine

that they're little bags,

full of coins that make
a sound like this.

Now you try it.

Do it gently,
or it won't work.

Try again.

Oh, how cute.

Mom?

I'm here in the cabin.

Really?

Yeah.

No, I'm being
very good.

Don't worry.

Mom?

I can't talk now, the
monitor is calling me.

We've got a group
meeting or something.

Great.

I have to hang up.

No, nothing.

All right.

I'm fine, really great.

'Bye.

'Bye.

There are over
400 children.

We can't check on
them all every day.

And this isn't a prison.

I called you
as soon as I realised.

Be quiet.

I'm trying to think.

Did he say where he is?

No.

But I've got an idea.

Listen, I'm talking
to you.

Yes, yes.

Did I tell you

that I screwed
Raquel Welch?

Yes, yes.

How could
I have told you?

We only met
this afternoon.

Fuck you.

Yes, yes.

Well, I'm going
to tell you.

Listen.

We were making a film
here in Almeria,

"100 Rifles",

and Raquel Tejada,

for that's Raquel Welch's
real name, habibi,

says to me,

"How long
do we have?"

And I say to her,

"Until the next take."

She took me
to her trailer...

Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
Oh, boy!

Twenty minutes, Habibi.

Are you listening,
asshole?

Yes, yes.
Oh boy oh boy oh boy.

You lot are the limit.
You shower of bastards.

You can understand
when you want to.

Fuck!

What time is it?

Time for the show!

Grandpa!

Three things.

One, don't call me
grandpa.

Two, don't shout
when I'm hangover.

Three, what the hell
is it?

The show!

We can give it a miss
for once.

The Japanese
are waiting.

The Japanese?

The Japanese are back?

How many are there?

A busload.

I don't know
if he's asleep

or if he's dead.

No matter.

Carlos, get dressed.

Me? What do I have
to do?

Just get on the roof,
shoot me

and that's it.
No falling.

Why not? Let me try it.

You want
to end up like him?

You want to be
from Bilbao too?

I'm going to the gallows.

Sons of bitches!
Bastards!

Get out of town,
Cheyenne!

We don't want you here!

I don't talk to pigs!

Can you repeat
what you just said?

Fuck, I don't talk
to pigs!

I can't hear you,
Cheyenne.

Say it again.

You've busted my balls!

Carlos!
I don't believe it!

Christ!

I told you not to fall.

- How did I do?
- I'm going to kill you!

You did great!
You were fantastic!

I can accuse you
of kidnapping.

He's under age, Juli�n.

You can go to jail
for this.

Mom, it was me. None
of it is Juli�n's fault.

Be quiet.

We'll talk back at home.

Let's go,
I don't want to

waste another
second here.

I'm staying.

Don't talk rubbish.
Get in the car.

Get in the car!

You've got the same
problem again, Laura.

They don't love you.

They prefer to live here
with me, in Almeria.

It's in their blood.

You're a bastard, Juli�n.

I'll do all I can to ruin

what little life
you've got left.

I swear to God!

You can't hurt me here.

This is my home.

Your home?

This is a drunkard's
nightmare.

A carnival sideshow

run by three deadbeats.

They've all gone, Juli�n.

Or they're dead.

Like your son!

You killed him.

With your lies

and with your
stinking films!

I won't let
that happen again.

I'm not angry with you.

But why are you
treating me like this?

You tricked me,

lied to me,

and did the one thing

that could really
hurt me!

You went
to your grandfather.

I didn't know him.

You still
don't know him.

All this is just a front.

It's a fa�ade, like him.

Yes, he may seem
like a legend.

An old adventurer
from the west.

But if you knew him
like I do,

you'd know
that behind that front,

there's nothing.

He's an old alcoholic

who's never done
anything for anybody.

He just wants
to enjoy himself.

That's why he needs
to be alone.

It's easy to be funny

when you don't have
to pay taxes

or school fees

or doctor's bills
for anyone.

In the real world

you have to give up
lots of things

if you really
love people.

In that case,

why did Dad leave you
and go back with him?

- Yes?
- Laura.

Scott, I'm driving.
What's up?

Valencia is screwed.

What?

They want another fifty
million for the land.

That's impossible!

I've tried everything.

Wait, I'll stop.

God!

What do we do?

We'll have to find
something else.

We need sun and land
that's worthless.

Yes.

Just a minute.

Wait.

I've got it.

Another site? Where?

Don't do anything.

Don't speak to them yet.
Give me three hours.

We filmed "Flint's
Gold" here in 1965.

This set was built

over what was once
a real mine,

from when they believed

there was gold
in Almeria.

And now,

we've come to
the cr�me de la cr�me.

The museum
of the west!

Here we have
the treasures

which the Americans left

when they came to Spain

to make
their great films.

This is the
mythical sleigh

from "Doctor Zhivago".

Omar Sharif and Julia
Christie rode in that.

This is the saddle
and the horse Babieca

which Charlton Heston
rode in "El Cid".

And these are
the saddles from

the camels in
"Lawrence of Arabia".

Stop touching things,
kid.

Ma'am, tell your son to
behave, these are relics.

This is

Clint Eastwood's
authentic poncho.

Smell it, ma'am.

It smells of Clint.

This is the poncho worn
by Clint Eastwood

in "A Fistful of
Dollars".

He never took it off
a single day

during the entire shoot.

He lost three kilos,

for not taking off
the poncho.

Here he is.

The person at his side
is your humble servant.

I did everything that my
friend Clint couldn't do.

That's the
stuntman's work.

To do what the star
can't or won't do.

Watch closely.

What do you think?

The job is badly paid

and not highly
thought of,

but it's full of honor
and grandeur.

Between us,

between the stars
and their double

there is a
splendid relationship.

We, the stuntmen, are
part of their success.

But unfortunately we
don't share their glory.

Mr. Clint Eastwood

is an international star

and nobody knows me.

That is why

the great actors

have a great respect
for us

and a great fondness
which lasts a lifetime.

This photo is a montage.

It's been cut out
and stuck on.

Of course it is, ma'am!
What do you think?

That I'd ask
my friend Clint

to have his photo taken
with me?

He'd have thought
I was doing it

for money,
not for friendship.

Right, that's it.
The visit's over.

Back into the street.

What about
the Mexican village?

Yeah,
the Mexican village.

Yeah,
the Mexican village!

Do I look
like a Mexican?

Come back another day.

You think
I'm going to show you

the Mexican village

for 10 fucking Euros?

Go on, go down
to the beach

and have a swim.
It's a great day.

Juli�n, do you hear me?
No, no fucking chance.

It wasn't now, was it?

No, it was time
for the museum.

If you read the program
you'd know.

Take it easy. Since your
grandson left, you...

I don't give a shit
about my grandson!

You hear?

I don't need anybody,
you hear?

There's Don Mariano.

Good news. Here's
this month's salary.

It's only the 15th.

Why are you being
so generous?

That's not all.

Here's another month
in advance.

What's up?

It's very simple.

We're fired.

I'm sorry, I got an offer
I couldn't refuse.

- You've sold the town?
- This afternoon.

It's impossible.

- You can't do that!
- I've done it.

You don't like it?

I can compensate you
for wrongful dismissal.

They've paid me
so much

I can let you have
quite a bit.

How much is that?

At least
3,000 Euros each.

3,000 Euros?

I've never seen
that much all at once.

3,000 Euros.
Just like that?

Serve them
whatever they want.

It's on the house.

Yeah, sure.

Come on, Juli�n.
Cheer up, look.

Yeah, let's celebrate.

They're knocking
our house down

and paying us a pittance
for our lives.

That money

won't last a year.

It won't even last
six months!

You'll be back working
as a waiter in his bar.

The indians will be
picking tomatoes.

And the rest'll be
unemployed.

Let's drink to that.

That's how it's going
to be, right?

Come on, who was it?

A company from Madrid

that wants to build
a theme park.

Think about it.

They'll create jobs,

build hotels
and restaurants.

It's good for the town.

I'm talking as mayor,
not as a businessman.

You think
we're assholes?

They'll bring in
outsiders, like always.

We won't see
a cent of it.

Ma che cazzo di merda.

I'm sorry,
but I can't do anything.

And neither can you.

Juli�n,
where are you going?

What are you going
to do?

He's going to town
to buy cigarettes,

to go to the club!

Carlitos, come down
and eat!

I've made lamb,
I know you like it.

I don't want anything.

What are you going
to do?

Stay in bed
until you're 18?

Holy Mother!

What a pain!

Hello, Roc�o.

Hello,

Juli�n.

My God, you look
so old.

And you look the same
as ever.

I knew it.

I knew that some day

you'd come
and apologize.

Slow down.

I've come to talk
to Laura.

She's at work.

You've come to see me.

You've come to see me.

Don't lie.

Roc�o, please.

The last time we talked
I ended up in hospital.

I should have aimed
at your heart.

But you aimed
at my balls.

It still hurts
when I piss.

Don't pretend.

You can't live
with the anguish

that's eating you up,

and you've come

crawling back
to apologize.

But I'm sorry,

It's too late.

- Go on, call Carlos.
- Over my dead body.

Carlos, it's Juli�n!

Grandpa!

Goodbye, Roc�o.

I'm warning you.

If he isn't here when
his mother gets home,

she'll kill me.

But first,

I'll rip off whatever
is left hanging there.

Got that?

I love you too.

Let's go, Carlos.

We'll have 18 whiskies
and 4 pasties.

Give me a shot.
What do you want?

A Coca-Cola.

What's that look for?

Grandma says
you drink too much.

And she's right.

Give me another.

I didn't even
feel that one.

Leave the bottle,
and save your feet.

Christ!

- That's me!
- Who?

Wait. Don't change
the channel!

Leave it!

Do you see those tanks?

This is where I appear
now. That's me!

That's
an American actor!

No, dickhead,
I'm his double,

I'm driving the jeep.

His double.

Yeah, Patton's double.

Was it a war film?

No it was a romance.
For fuck's sake.

- Who was Patton?
- Patton?

Patton was a guy
with balls.

Look.

This

is Africa.

Rommel was here.

And Patton was here.

He was surrounded
by nazis.

But he wouldn't bow
down to Hitler

or any of his crew.

But he escaped.

And he fucking
invaded Italy.

Why are you taking
that away?

Leave Patton here
and leave Rommel here.

He was surrounded
by nazis.

But he managed it
in the end.

And do you know why?

He didn't give up?

Exactly! He didn't
give up.

That's the way.

If they chose you, you
must have been like him.

Yeah.

Yeah, years ago I was...

I was like that.

What about
the land re-zoning?

How's that
coming along?

Very well,
they'll approve the...

How are you?

- Carlos, wait outside.
- Can't I listen?

All right.

Fuck!

This is some office
they gave you.

I want you to know
I'm not here

to cause you
any problems.

Go to hell.

Listen, I...

I'm here to make peace.

I never wanted
to take your son away.

If he was with me
for a day

it was because
he wanted.

But it won't
happen again.

You come here with
Carlos to tell me that?

You think I'm stupid?

- Lola.
- Yes?

- Call a taxi.
- Right away.

Wait a minute.

I won't let Carlos
come back to Almeria.

If he does, I'll put him
on a bus to Madrid.

I don't want to interfere
in your life.

Please, don't
destroy mine.

Your western town.

Is that it?

It's all I've got.

Juli�n,

this has got nothing
to do with you.

It's just business.

The land where
we want to build

happens to be
where you work.

Bad luck.

Your show
is of no interest.

People want
something different.

I've come to apologize,

something
I've never done.

It's time you started.

All right, you win.

I won't see him again.

But, please,
don't destroy the town.

Very touching.

This company's aim
is to make money.

And this is a huge
multi-national deal.

It isn't my decision.
I'm really sorry.

Bad luck, kid.

No more playing
at cowboys and indians.

What's going on?

Here you are,
Don Juli�n.

This time
I don't want blanks.

I want the kind
that do damage.

I can't, you need
a license for that.

Like this?

Like this.

Here you are.

Going to test your aim?

Sort of.

I need more. Give
me the lot you've got.

- The lot?
- The lot.

800 bullets.

That's all I've got.

I want to update
the show.

Something modern,
you know.

Like you see nowadays.

So long, sideburns!

They had to start there.

You'll end up missing it.

It's back to sweating
under the plastic.

You think we'll last
in the greenhouses?

We'll think about that

when we've blown
the 3,000 Euros!

This letter was left
in the bar. It's for you.

- What was it?
- A letter from Jacinta.

Anything serious?

Nah, she's
left me forever.

Lord above...

She says I've got
no personality.

I always let myself
be pulled along.

You think she's right?

Well...

In a way,

she is.

What's going on?

You!

Move!

Juli�n, what the hell
are you doing?

Listen...

Take it easy.
Put down the rifle.

Andr�s, get out of town.

You've gone crazy!

Now I'm really pissed!

Hold it right there!

Now I do have bullets.

Take his gun.

Whatever you're up to,
it's crazy.

The police will be here
in an hour.

The national police.

They won't be as nice
to you as we are.

Believe me.

They can come
when they want.

I'm waiting for them.

What the hell
have you just done?

What Patton
would have done.

Who's Patton?

You know what
that excavator is worth?

- No, and I don't care.
- Shit.

I finally got
El�as's gun.

And I got Andr�s's.

We can't
give them back now.

This is
resisting authority.

Now we really
are outlaws!

Right, we're fugitives.

Legendary fugitives.
Scary, isn't it?

THEY WERE HERE

Sorry, you have
to move.

Our company
owns the land.

We want to speak to
the person in charge.

You won't talk
to anybody.

This is police business.

Attention!
This is the police.

Come out
with your hands up

and nothing will happen.

Me va fan culo, faggot!

What did he say?

They won't
surrender, sir.

All right, go ahead.
Bring them out!

Fire! Fire!

Pull back!

Pull back!

Bastards!

No one told us
they were armed!

Christ Almighty!

How do you think they
blew up the excavator?

Those are real bullets.

We've got
one casualty already.

They're pulling back,
we held them off!

This is going
to end badly.

Think about it a bit.

Don't be such a pain!

It's a crime now.

They'll arrest all of us.

Chief!

Listen, chief!

What's going on
in there?

Promise you'll
do nothing

to harm
our company's name.

What do you mean?

You want us to get them
out? Then shut up.

This isn't a protest
by immigrants.

Those people
are professionals.

But there are
tourists here,

people are filming
everything.

This looks
like a goddamn war!

You want me to
arrest them for looking?

Medina,
call headquarters

and ask
for reinforcements.

Tell them
this is out of control.

Our spaceship computer

is suggesting
a final alternative.

What's happening
in Almeria

might seem
like a western

but this time it could
have a dramatic ending.

A group of workers

in the "Texas
Hollywood" town

where the famous
spaghetti westerns

were shot years ago,

are refusing to accept
its closure.

Carlos! Your grandpa
is on the TV!

Go back! You can't
get through!

All these
goddamn cameras!

Take a look at that!

They must have
a huge budget!

I told you my grandpa
worked on the big films.

This time I'm going to
ask if they need people.

- I don't understand it.
- Shit!

They all agreed,
except Juli�n.

We should have offered
more money.

It's a bit late for that.

Go for it!

It all seems so real!

Bastards!

Hey, you lot!
You fucking cops!

Come and get me,
you bastards!

We can't
back down now!

If we stick together,

we can hold out,
like in Numancia!

All we've got

are the potato chips
in the machine.

They'll wait
till we die of hunger

and have to come out.

We're done for,
he's hungry!

Cheyenne is right.

Are we going
to surrender

just to fill his belly?

Who mentioned
surrender?

We have to go out
tonight to find supplies.

Impossible.

We're surrounded by
all the cops in Almeria.

It's crazy, and anyway
I'm not hungry!

We could dig a tunnel.

Christ Almighty! You
should be in Madrid!

Now we've got the kid
as well!

- I'm on your side.
- Our side?

Just wait till this is
over. And get down!

Come on, get down.

Get your head down.

The kid suggested
digging a tunnel!

That would take weeks!

A tunnel!
Fucking great!

If everyone says
something stupid

we might get lucky.

Wait!

The boy's right!

Flint's mine!

It's guarded.
We're screwed.

Hold it.

Carlos, do
what I told you.

- What did you tell him?
- Will you shut up!

Why do you have
to know everything?

They'll catch him.

This is crazy!

Hey...

What are we
waiting for?

Shit!

Now!

- And the ragazzo?
- He's coming.

Come on,
what's keeping you?

Shit!

Hooligans!

Turn off that shit!

Juli! It's us!

Weren't you trapped
in the town?

Yeah, but now we're
here. Open the door.

It is open.

The door to the bar,
not the house.

What's going on?

Nothing!
Go back to sleep!

Don Mariano
has got the keys.

Hooligans!
Get out of here!

Go on,
you crowd of bastards!

Shit!

Fuck!

Weren't you
trapped in the town?

No, ma'am, we weren't.

Christ, everybody here
knows everything.

What the TV says
is all a lie,

like when they went
to the moon.

Mariano, wake up.
Wake up!

I seems Juli
hasn't got the keys.

So, come on, get up.

Fuck!

I work my whole life,
and now

you do this to me.
It isn't fair.

Do you want supplies
to survive on,

or do you want
to eat my hams?

Hello?

Operator.

I want to send
a telegram.

Leave those cigars alone.

If I can't smoke
I'll surrender.

All right, take a box,

but leave the bottles.
This isn't a party.

Jacinta Gonz�lez,
Garden Street,

- Three.
- Yes.

- Benidorm.
- Benidorm.

- The text, please.
- The text?

Go to hell,
you lousy bitch.

You're a shameless
whore.

I never want
to see you again.

- Frowzy bitch?
- No, not frowzy, lousy.

- Lousy bitch.
- That's it.

- What?
- Anything else?

No, that'll do.

You can have
another 3 words.

And it'll cost the same?

- That's right.
- OK, put...

- Slut.
- Slut.

- Slut.
- Slut.

Anything else?

- Slut.
- Slut. Is that right?

Thank you
for using our service.

Thank you.

What are you doing?

Are you robbing
the bar?

Not now, Juli.

Leave us alone
for a little while,

will you, love?

This is very serious.

Your husband's lost
his mind.

You'll get me fired!

You want us both
thrown out?

How will we pay
the mortgage?

Forget about
the mortgage for once

and get the hell
out of here.

Cheyenne, stop babbling
and do something.

And you, Juli, get out.

You're like
his lap-dog.

I thought
you were smarter.

We've got no alternative.

Take that sausage.

He's brainwashed you.

I do what I want.
I'm a free agent.

If you help me,
I'll get you out of this.

I can get out
on my own.

You think so?

This is getting nasty.

And those people
have money. Wake up!

If you help us out,
they'll look out for you.

You get what I mean?

Here.

I'll call you.

Take it, it doesn't bite!

Hell!

Throw down your guns!

What are you
doing here?

I'm off duty tonight.

Throw down your guns!

Juli, get out of the way!

Don't you touch him.
Shoot at me, if you dare!

Why are you always
in the way?

I can't take any more.

Shut up,
I'm sick of this.

You and your pals
always acting so tough.

Now what, eh?
Now what, you asshole?

That gun's
from a Playstation.

- What?
- You can see the wire.

I had to try, right?

Go on.

Go to bed.

As for you...

What are you doing?
You really hurt me.

I thought
I'd knock him out.

You nearly
split my skull.

They're hitting
the mayor!

Go to bed!

I hope they kill you
like dogs.

Tie them
to the fountain.

We have to be careful.

Don't worry, Matilde,
it won't be for long.

I saw you on the TV.

I'm going to call
the Civil Guard!

Yes, call them.

Let's get the hell
out of here!

Tie them up, quick.

Matilde, if we're
on TV again,

tell your daughter
to tape it.

This is going
to end badly!

You'll be sorry!

You'll be in jail
tomorrow.

Ma va fan culo!

Bastards!

Fire!

Free bar!

This round is on me!

Fire!

- How was that?
- Very realistic.

Flatten everything!

Go for it!

Get back!

Don't shoot!

Tell them not to shoot!
They've got my son!

Hold your fire!

I repeat, hold your fire.

This is a disaster!

Good evening
from the town

of Texas Hollywood.

The situation
is very tense

in Tabernas, Almeria,

as a result
of confrontations

between the police

and the former stuntmen
who worked in the town

and refuse to leave it.

There is a lot
of confusion

about what is happening

but we know that
at least 20 people

have been
seriously injured.

These people
in no way represent

the majority
of the town,

because we are
decent people

and the Town Council

strongly condemns
these incidents.

It's been part
of the town for years,

they shouldn't
knock it down.

The western town is
typical of this area.

Don't take it away.

Look at what they did
to my taxi.

Who's going
to pay for that?

Spielberg?
Or Garci?

Who the hell's going
to pay?

This tough guy
from the north!

Look at that!

I'd like to send
this message

to the workers
in the town.

I appreciate
your situation.

You've been fired

and you're worried that

the old town
will disappear.

But I want
to make it clear

that our company's
intention

is not to forget
the past

but to create a better
future for everyone

by building a new
western town.

- What did she say?
- She said a new town.

In this new town,

more modern
and better equipped,

all the former workers

will be guaranteed
a new job

and better wages.

We don't know
why your representative

refused our offer
of continuity.

Our representative?

But I can tell you this.

The offer still stands.

Thank you.

It's a trap.
Don't you see?

We'll be arrested
and that offer

will be forgotten.

That's a lie!

You met with her
in Madrid.

Everyone knows
you're related.

She's the kid's mother.

You knew
about the offer

and you said nothing.

Is that true, Juli�n?

Did you see them
in Madrid?

Yes.

But there was no offer.

It's a trap.

She wants us
to come out

and this is
the first step.

Making us doubt
each other.

And it worked,

because I don't
understand anything.

It's obvious.

They offered Juli�n
a solution

and he kept it quiet.

Juli�n, please,
say it isn't true.

You spoke to them and
didn't tell us anything?

It didn't concern you.

It was between her
and me.

It didn't concern us?

We've worked our guts
out here!

Who do we believe?

A company that
offers us work, or you,

who goes around
pretending

you've worked
with the big actors.

I worked
with the Americans.

I've never seen you
in any films.

Because I'm a stuntman,
idiot.

My job is not
to be seen.

Yeah, and we have
to believe you.

Like always.

Like with your son.

What do you mean?

That's a different
matter.

You know exactly
what I'm talking about.

It isn't the time
to talk about that.

Why not?

It happened years ago,

but you lied
to everyone, like now.

I said this isn't
the time.

You were drunk
and you blew it.

Shut up!

The truth hurts,
doesn't it?

You weren't there.

Everybody knows.

You weren't there

to back him up
when he jumped.

You were supposed
to help him

and you didn't.

He jumped on his own

and died under
the horses' hooves.

I'd had a drink,

but I wasn't drunk!

I didn't kill him.

I didn't kill him.

So why were you
thrown off the film?

Go on.

Tell your grandson
about the trial,

and how you spent
two years in jail.

He said he was guilty.

The lawyer said
it was best.

Since then, all you've
done is get drunk!

Now that your grandson
is here

and you can't look him
in the eye,

you prefer to destroy
everything

and be a hero.

You want to die
with your boots on

so he'll think
you're great.

All right.

But what does all of that
have to do with us?

Why do we have to get
screwed because of you?

Yes.

It's for you.
They're asking

for our representative.

Yes.

All right.

They're waiting outside.
You can go if you want.

Let's go.

I feel as stupid as ever.

Come on!

I'm staying.

I said you're to go,
all of you.

Va fan culo.

I've always been late
for everything.

This time,
I won't miss it.

Even if it kills me.

I'm staying, maestro.

I always told you
the truth.

You said you weren't
there when it happened.

Well, it was a manner of
speaking. I thought that

you wouldn't
understand.

You lied to me!

All right, I lied!

I said anything just to
get you to shut you up.

Happy?

Now you can
clear off too.

Get out, all of you!

I don't need anyone,
much less a goddamn kid

who's fucked up my life!

No, Carlos, don't go.

I didn't mean that!

I was somebody.

I rode with the greatest.
That isn't a lie.

Show him the napkin.
Carlos!

That's right!
The napkin!

Wait! Look!

What's that?

It's Clint Eastwood's
phone number.

He gave it to me
40 years ago.

Shall I call him?

I'll call him.

Juli�n, don't bother now,
call him another day.

After all these years,

he's probably
moved house.

Be quiet.

They said that

he isn't at home now.

It's nighttime there.
He'll be out for dinner.

Who are you?

- Sandra, she's a friend.
- A friend.

Juli�n and the
gravedigger aren't here.

Your plan was no use.

We have to take
tougher action!

- What's your idea?
- To solve the problem.

What did you
promise him?

Nothing, it was
all his idea.

Don't lie to me.
I know your methods.

What about yours?

Didn't you promise
them a new town

that we're not going
to build?

I lied, but I don't
want to kill anyone.

This is getting out
of control.

The time has come.

He's capable
of anything.

Of killing me
or killing himself.

But I know him.

We've worked together
for a long time

and with God's help

- maybe I can prevent it.
- Don't listen, he's mad!

What are you
doing here?

You're not going
in there!

Juli, for God's sake.

And take off
those things!

Not in front of the TV!

I don't care
about the TV!

Fuck it, Juli!

Let me do something
on my own

for once in my life!

He knows
what he's doing.

He's lost his mind!

He's worse
than the other one.

Get out of here.

Leave me alone!
Take your hands off me!

It's me!

I'm coming in!

They're going
to kill each other.

It's what they've
always wanted.

Was it all lies?

What are you going
to do to grandpa?

Let's go.

Let go of me!
Put me down!

Come on!

It's

the dust from the desert.

It got in my eyes.

The two of you
are scared shitless!

Why don't you
come out

and show your faces?

Is this the town
you want to preserve?

A heap of old wood,
just like you?

Come out of there.
You're pitiful.

I don't talk to pigs.

Now you're the one
acting the fool.

I thought
you were going

to make it harder
for me.

Bastard!

You want me
to kill you too,

dickhead?

Now you know

who your goddamn
coffin was for.

Give me that toy pistol,
you'll hurt yourselves.

Juli�n, stop
messing around.

Andr�s, you're
an interfering bastard.

I don't need help to
deal with a lousy waiter.

I don't need
anyone's help.

Is this sun driving you
all mad?

I'm going to get
a few years

and I'm too old
to go back to jail.

Maybe, but I don't want
you to kill each other.

Drop your gun.

I hope we're in time.

I've knocked him out
all right.

Now we'll see
who's scared shitless.

It was all a trap.

You came here
like a friend,

but you just wanted

to betray me.

You're a second-rater,
kid.

You'll never be able
to replace me.

You're too fat.

Did you hear that, fatso?

Shut up!

Go away.

Turn round and
leave town, Cheyenne.

We don't want you here.

Tell the TV people
whatever you want.

You can still
sell popcorn

when they pull
this down.

What is it?

Aren't you going
to shoot?

Or do
your chubby fingers

not fit
around the trigger?

You want me
to come closer?

Come on, bastard.

Do a favor for a friend.

For once in your life.

Aren't you going
to shoot,

son of a bitch?

I was a friend
of your grandpa.

I know.