All language subtitles for Bojack.horseman.S04E09.STRiFE.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

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Class, settle down. Settle down.

It's Ruthie's turn to
present her ancestor.

- Go ahead, Ruthie.
- Okay, Teach-Bot.

- Mrs. Teach-Bot.
- Ugh.

My great-great-great grandmother
was called Princess Carolyn.

She was an agent and
a manager in Hollywoo.

What's the difference between
an agent and a manager?

Both look to find
projects for their clients

but only managers can produce.

What?

My mom told me that I come from

a long line of strong female cats.

Princess Carolyn was the runt

of 12 and it made her
one of the toughest.

Mom said, "She could take
a lickin' and keep on tickin'."

This expression refers to clocks,

an old fashioned way of timekeeping

before we all universally
accepted the bean system.

"The bean system is the way."

For Ancestry Day, I'm gonna tell you

a particular story about
one particular day

on which Princess Carolyn faced

and overcame particular adversity

all the way back in the year 2017.

The day began like any other.

Princess Carolyn lived
with her boyfriend, Ralph.

She was pregnant and very happy.

Sorry I can't go with you to the doctor.

- Don't worry about it. I feel great!
- Today is crucial.

Stilton Cards has to
create its own holiday

to really be playing with the big boys.

Hallmark, American Greeting,

those chunky cards that play
music when you open them.

I just know you're gonna be
the next Joey K. Easter,

the guy who invented Arbor Day.

How about "National
Friend of a Friend Day?"

- Is that anything?
- You'll think of something.

Mm!

Give me just a sip of the coffee.

I can have a sip.

- One sip.
- Today is going to be great.

Oh...!

- Hey.
- Oh-hh!

She was wrong.

Today was gonna suck.

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- www.MY-SUBS.com -

Princess Carolyn started her day

with a call to BoJack Horseman,

her former client-slash-lover.

- Ruthie! Inappropriate!
- Sorry.

Go for BoJack!

You like that? I'm trying
out some new phone stuff.

Or is "Bo for GoJack" better?
Nah, maybe too clever.

I don't want people to think
I'm trying. Sorry, who is this?

Princess Carolyn, moron.

Oh, hey, P.C.

- So what do you think?
- About what?

"Go for BoJack!" Or maybe...

Ugh, stop! You need to get a new agent.

- I'm sick of fielding your offers.
- Offers?

Well, you tell them that I am
not doing another reality show.

So degrading. All they
had at craft services was

Kirkland snacks, P.C. Kirkland snacks.

Well, first of all, I
don't work for you,

so I'm not gonna tell anyone anything.

But, second, these are
actually good offers.

- Really? Like what?
- I'm not telling you because...

Got it. Busy, busy. I'm busy too,
so I'll call you back later.

- Bye.
- Don't call. I don't work for you!

How's this for a headline for the blog?

You write about this, quote,
"BoJack Finally Solves Mystery

"of Hollyhock's Mother",
comma, "Looks Handsome",

colon ": Is Cool." End quote.

I still don't understand your
plan, or how that's a headline.

The plan couldn't be simpler.
Go to the county courthouse,

ask to see all the birth certificates
on file, find Hollyhock's,

see what it says in the "mother" spot.

They're not just gonna give
you the birth certificates.

Well, I gotta try something.
I have this girl at my house

who came to me for help,
I want to do right by her.

I just don't know if
you've thought through...

Diane, I am a famous.

They will give me the birth certificate.

Everyone gives me everything
I want all the time.

It is an existential curse,

but a huge day-to-day convenience.

- So why do you need me?
- I don't know.

- Just wanted some company.
- You told me to use a vacation

day because this was, quote,

"a feminism-related emergency."

- I got your number!
- Why didn't you just bring Hollyhock?

I was gonna, but she got really into
counting her teeth this morning,

didn't want to leave the house.
You know how teens are.

Ruthie, this was supposed
to be about your ancestor.

Who are all these other

- "chara-ca-ters"?
- They fill out the world.

Well, can you try to keep
things focused, please?

Okay, okay, okay.

Princess Carolyn had been
called to Gekko-Rabitowitz...

The agency of her nemesis,
and nemesis-slash-former lover.

- Ruthie!
- Sorry, Teach-Bot.

She had a lot of former lovers.

She was a fluid sexual
being, not a machine.

But today was all about business.

She was there because she was trying

to get her client Courtney
Portnoy cast in...

Corpse "Me If You Can-Can",

the 1940's Cannes, France-set story

of a can-can dancer who contracts cancer

but continues to can-can
as a canny cadaver

who plays the accordion with
Kevin Corrigan, Kevin Kline,

Chris Klein, Chris
Pine and Chris Kattan.

- Got it.
- Gekko.

Princess Carolyn, hi! Love the dress.

Is it new, or something I've seen

you wear literally hundreds of times?

Normally, Princess Carolyn
would've been rattled,

but that day, she realized Vanessa Gekko

no longer had any power over her.

In truth, the woman had challenged

and inspired Princess Carolyn,

not only to be a better agent,

but to be brave enough
to try and have it all.

Princess Carolyn wanted
to tell her thank you,

but instead she said...

- You look tired, "Veronica."
- Oh, I...

Amazing burn, Princess Carolyn.

Hey, Princess. We have a little snag.

Did Chris Kattan drop out?
Right before his comeback?

Right when the world is finally
ready to settle for Kattan?

- No, it's...
- You're fired.

I'm fired?

I tried to talk her out of it, but
between the gun movie misfiring

and her nuptials turning
into "nope-tials,"

and her blaming you for
both of those things...

Who knew Portnoy had so many complaints?

Oh, just give me one more chance.

I promise I can get you the lead

in that can-can cadaver movie.

What?

Oh, P.C.,

C.P. just made that whole
thing up to get you here.

You thought that was real?

The 1940's corpse who learns accordion?

It sounds so ludicrous.

You did play the
short-sighted seamstress

in "The Storm on Northern Fortress."

Well, yeah, but that was just because
I wanted to work with Ashton.

We'll talk later, right?
I'm so sorry. Bye.

Did you have a good meeting?

Did you get fired?

Aw.

Sorry you got fired. Here's a latte.

Oh, uh...

- It's decaf, ma'am.
- Thanks, Judah.

You know, one year ago,
a setback like this

would have really spun me out.

But I don't need Courtney.

Every time we fall, we get back

up stronger and better than ever.

- Can I get a hallelujah?
- Is that a sort of pressed juice?

I'll have one hallelujah
on your desk by 12:45.

Great. What's next?

I noticed your necklace was broken,

so I pushed back your appointment,

and found a reputable jeweler nearby.

Don't know what I'd do without
you, my hairy number two!

Oh, God, I'm sorry.
That came out horribly.

Not to speak above my station,

but perhaps it would
behoove us to entice

BoJack Horseman back into our stable.

- Ugh!
- I'm sorry, ma'am.

"Stable" and "behoove"
were poor word choices.

I was not trying to engage in
punnery during business hours,

but we've received 15 more inquiries

about BoJack just this morning,

and I don't think it's
wise to look a gift...

opportunity in the mouth.

BoJack is off the table.

We're a small management company.

We just need to focus
on the clients we have.

You know best.

- ♪ Who's that dog? ♪
- ♪ Mr. Peanutbutter... ♪

Mo for Gister Peanutbutter!

Hey, handsome. Heard you dropped
out of the governor's race.

Now let's get you back to work on

what really matters... show business!

- I'm going to stop you right there.
- I was done.

Can't wait to get back
in front of the camera,

but right now, I have to help my former

political rival defeat my two ex-wives.

One of whom is in the pocket
of powerful lobbyists

and the other of whom
murdered popular actor

and soundtrack artisan, Zach
Braff, and ate his burnt flesh!

Politics as usual, right?

Well, when you're ready to work again...

Gotta go. They need all hands on deck,

because Woodchuck lost
his hands underground

and they replaced them
with creepy lobster claws.

Typical politics!

Hey. So I need this clasp

replaced, 24-karat gold.

This is a priceless family heirloom.

Princess Carolyn had gotten her necklace

from her mother, who got it from
her mother, who brought it from

the old country. When our
ancestors first emigrated

to America, they were very poor.

Back in the Motherland, they had
been doctors and engineers,

but here, they struggled to find work.

Every night, they would sing
the song of the old country,

hoping to reclaim the
glory of those days.

♪ Meow-meow! Meow-meow! ♪

♪ Meow-meow Meow-meow, meow-meow! ♪

They slowly sold all their belongings

as they attempted to hang on

to a middle-class way of life.

♪ Meow-meow... ♪

♪ Meow-meow! ♪

But she never sold that necklace,

because that was the one gift
she could give her daughter.

A treasure from the past
and a symbol of the tenacity

and stick-to-itiveness that has

for generations led my family

to always land on their feet.

- You can come back in about two hours.
- Thank you.

Sorry, sorry! Wait. Sorry, sorry.

Okay, okay, okay.

I'm just looking for
something really nice.

This is for a sexy catfish
I met on the Internet.

- Charley?
- Princess Carolyn!

You work at a jewelry store now?

No, I own my own management company.

Oh, yeah. Good for you.

I'm so proud of you.

Your approval means nothing to me.

So I guess it's good you said
"no" to my offer last year.

What offer? I mean,

exactly what offer are
you talking about?

I get so many.

Last year, I reached out to your guy...

I wanna say, "Ju-do"...

- Judah.
- This guy's name was Judo.

I offered to buy VIM
and merge it with Vigor.

We would have called
the new company, VIMgor.

Oh, right. That offer.

I couldn't believe when he
said you weren't interested.

Well, yeah. Because I wasn't,

and he does what I say.

So I guess it all worked
out for everyone.

You got to start over as a manager,

and instead of buying VIM,
I bought the Utah Jazz.

They're terrible agents,
but they're getting better.

- Yeah.
- Anyway, nice bumping into...

- Oh, sorry.
- Careful, please. Ooh.

- Oopsie. Oh, boy.
- No, no.

Is that valuable? It is.

My great, great, great grandmother was

dismayed that her trusted colleague

had kept this from her.

Her mind raced, "Was Judah
capable of deception?"

She hoped what Charley
told her wasn't true,

but her instincts told her the
frog wasn't smart enough to lie.

First quarter, second quarter.
Wow, that's a lot of quarters.

Oh, excuse me. Hello.

Judah, you'll never guess
who I just ran into.

No, I won't. Very astute, ma'am.

- It was Charley Witherspoon!
- Mm-hmm.

- Char... ley...
- Hmm...? Hmm!

- Wither... spoon!
- Hmm.

- Okay.
- How does that make you feel?

That very short story
makes me feel nothing.

I don't think it's your
fault as a storyteller.

I often have trouble
engaging with narratives.

His lack of response made
her hope it wasn't true.

Could it all have been
a misunderstanding

involving an enigmatic
stranger named "Judo"?

So, what's next, then?

Ooh, I want to get the life rights
to that woman I saw on Instagram

who had a pretty coffee.

I bet we could attach Jessica Alba

and Jonathan Taylor-Thomas by lunch.

Okay, but I still don't
understand what a manager is.

Do they just say the names
of movies and actors?

How does that generate revenue?

No one knows, Torf. It's not important!

Be quiet, Torf. Take your Hush Pill.

Yes, Miss Teach...

Uh-hh...

- Continue your presentation, Ruthie.
- Thank you.

- And finally, Rob Lowe.
- Great idea, Princess Carolyn.

But is it possible you've forgotten
your doctor's appointment?

- Oh, fish!
- It's my fault.

I rescheduled it in an attempt
to make your life easier.

Thank you, Judah! I'll call you if

I think of any more actor names.

Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba...

- God, this is taking forever.
- We've been waiting for 15 minutes.

I know. Let's just go home.

No, Diane. How could
you even suggest that?

This is not about us.
This is for my daughter.

- Ugh.
- I know what I have to do.

Excuse me, excuse me. Pardon me.

Important celebrity
doing the right thing.

Whoa, a famous guy!

And he's doing the right thing?

This is like when George Clooney
married that less famous lady!

- Wait. Don't you mean Jurj Clooners?
- Who cares?

Hello, friend.

- Yes, it's me, BoJack Hor...
- Number?

I'm sorry, I don't give out
my personal phone number.

No, your number. You need a number

or I can't help you, BoJack Hor.

Horseman. It's Horseman.

I don't look familiar to you at all?

- Eh.
- Come on, BoJack. Let's get a number.

Wait a minute. You're Diane Nguyen!

I recognize you from
your Girl Croosh avatar.

I loved "Twenty Reasons
to Try the Diva Cup."

Oh, wow, thanks!

You didn't think 20
was too many reasons?

No way. Number 14

- blew my mind!
- Didn't I say it would?

We don't have time.
Where do we get a number?

- That line.
- What?

And you'll need these... forms.

Ow, paper cut! Who still uses paper?

Can't I just swipe an app or something?

Bye, Diane! Keep up the great work!

Oh, get over yourself.

- So? What's the prognosis?
- Hmm...

I'm trying to think of
the best way to put this.

As Charles Lindbergh would say,

"Sometimes you fly an airplane,
and sometimes you lose a baby."

In this case, you didn't
fly the airplane.

Wait, what?

Your pregnancy is no longer viable.

Well, how do we make it viable again?

Mm-mm...

How did this happen?

Goodness, I don't know.

I wouldn't beat yourself up.

Miscarriages happen for so many reasons.

There's nothing medically
wrong with you.

Maybe you just wanted the baby too much.

Maybe you didn't deserve it
because you were unkind once.

Maybe you ran afoul
of a trickster God or

wood nymph who is now exacting revenge.

Oof! This is...

A lot.

Not for me. This is my job, so...

- Pretty regular day.
- What do I do next?

Well, there's a procedure.

We can do it here later this week.

You want Darlene to call
someone to drive you home?

No, I'm okay. I don't need anyone.

You're a real tough broad.

Except for, you know, the uterus area.

Pretty weak.

- Hey, is my necklace ready?
- Oh, I was going to call you.

When I was working on your
necklace, I realized something.

- Oh?
- It's not actually gold,

it's just gold plated. See?

No, it's very expensive.

It's pretty, but basically worthless.

And I'm only saying it's pretty
to make you feel better.

But, it's from the old country.

It's been in my family for generations.

No, this is costume

jewelry from J.C. Penney.

Circa 1963. Somebody
just told you a story.

- I'm sorry.
- Wha... huh?

So, do you still want

a 24-karat gold clasp on this
garbage necklace, or...?

Oh-hh!

Oh!

Ralph, hey!

Hi, honey. Just checking on how
the doctor's appointment went

and also to wish you a happy
"Acknowledge Your Gardener Day."

It's a work in progress. Don't judge.

The doctor's appointment
got pushed back.

I'm actually just walking in now.

Oh, hello. Yes, it's me,

Princess Carolyn, here
for my appointment.

I like your perfume.

There is a painting of
a lake on the wall.

You sure it's okay I'm
not there with you?

Ralph, it's fine. I'm a big girl.

Everything is so easy with
you, Princess Carolyn.

I mean, that's why I love you.

Yeah, easy.

That's what the boys in high
school liked about me, too.

Okay, I'll see you tonight.

- I love you.
- I love you, too.

Oh, I didn't realize
you were still here.

Do you need anything else before I go?

No. Thank you.

Should you be drinking that?

You don't always know
what's best for me, Judah.

Is everything okay, Princess Carolyn?

Charley Witherspoon made
you an offer to buy Vim,

and you went over my head

and turned him down without telling me.

- Oh.
- So it's true.

- You lied to me.
- Yes.

Because you didn't want
to work at a big agency.

- You don't fit in with other people.
- I...

You're weird, so you'd rather stay

here where you have all the power.

No, Princess Carolyn...

So you lied to me, and you
made me look like an idiot!

I was trying to protect you.

If you heard, you'd feel
like you had to say yes.

I don't need you to protect me.

If you had time, you could
decide what to do next

on your own terms, which you did.

Well, that's not your decision to make.

Princess Carolyn, I
understand you're upset.

- And perhaps your emotions...
- No.

If I can't trust you, then
I can't work with you.

You're fired.

Thank you for my time
here, Princess Carolyn.

It's been very pleasurable. Until now.

This part is...

Sad.

Don't forget, you have
reservations at 8:00.

- Thank you, Judah.
- Good night.

Ruthie, this story has
gotten really dark.

It has a happy ending. I promise.

Well, can we get there soon?

This assignment was supposed
to be six beans long.

You've already gone on for eight beans.

Okay. I'm almost finished.

But first, let's check in
with BoJack and Diane again.

What have they been up to?

Error. Error.

I'm not leaving without the certificate!

I danced your dance, lady.
I filled out that form.

But I will not wait
in this line anymore.

Not one person in here
offered me a Fiji water,

and I am parched from all
the yelling I've been doing!

BoJack, let's go home.

No, I would like to register
a formal complaint.

- How do I do that?
- Complaints are on the eighth floor.

But you need to fill out an application
for a complaint registration,

which you can get by waiting
in line 12-B on the third floor.

You have won this round.

So Princess Carolyn had to meet Ralph.

But she didn't know how to
tell him what had happened

or how he'd take the news.

Okay, so, what do you think about
"National Paperweight Day"?

"Thanks for keeping my papers in place.

"I love you as big as outer space."

Okay, so you'd give that
card to a paperweight?

Ah, Principessa!

And Signor Stilton. Welcome-a back.

Let's have a drink then, yes?

I'll have a glass of
Châteauneuf-Du-Pape,

the red wine inspired by Scandal.

That Kerry Washington has really

brought red wine into popularity.

It's a-funny, because I
thought that the terroir

of the Italian countryside did it.

But, a-no, it's-a Miss

- Kerry Washington.
- Ugh.

Everybody love-a Miss-a Kerry.

And my gal pal here would
love some mint tea. Right?

- You know it.
- Bene, bene.

How was the doctor?
He tell you the species?

I can't stop thinking about squeezing
little Philbert's baby feet.

- Aw-ww...
- She wanted to tell him.

But she also wanted to let him stay

in his beautiful hopeful reality,

a reality she herself had
lived in just hours before,

and to which she now longed
desperately to return.

Well, the doctor didn't have much info.

You know how doctors are.

But he did say there's
nothing wrong with me, so...

- Ah, Miss-a Carrie Underwood.
- Ooh!

- Miss-a Carey Mulligan.
- Agh!

Miss-a Carey, first name
Mariah, right this-a way!

- Ugh!
- Look at all of these Miss-a-Carries!

Are you okay?

- I have to go.
- Oh. Well, you want me to drive you?

No, it's fine.

I'll just meet you at home.

Hmm.

But when Princess Carolyn got

to the home that she and Ralph shared,

she found she didn't have
the strength to go inside.

She wanted to go some place familiar,

some place that was just hers.

Oh!

Shh!

Oh, hey, Princess Carolyn.

What is going on here?

Only the future.

This is horrifying and
it doesn't look legal,

whatever it is, you'd better
cut me in for ten percent.

I could cut you off
a lot more than that.

Whose kid is that?

Look, if you didn't want
me to turn your apartment

into a base of operations for
my new clown-dentist venture,

you should have specified
that when I moved in.

Mommy? Where's my mom?

Oh, no! He's waking up.

Hit him with the giggle gas!

Ooh!

- Oh!
- All right.

You're clearly doing
important work here.

I'm just gonna have a quick
nightcap and go to bed.

- _
- ♪ What up? Let's rock this party ♪

♪ H2 limo and a case of Bacardi... ♪

♪ Look at me, I'm a dumb cat queen ♪

♪ My baby was the size
of a kidney bean ♪

Hey, what happened to your necklace?

Oh, fish! Fish, fish, fish, fish.

It must have fallen off!

Princess Carolyn? Are you in there?

Yeah, just a second!

- Todd, get these clowns outta here!
- Go, go, go, go.

Scatter, clowns!

Into the night! Go! Go!

Go, scamper! Everybody, out!

Ugh!

Okay.

- Oh, hello, handsome.
- Oh, thank God!

You didn't come home, didn't
answer your phone. I was worried.

Aw, you was worried?

Judah told me you might be here.

- Did you fire him?
- That hipster Chewbacca,

always getting in my personal biz-natch.

I didn't know you still had this place.

Why do you still have this place?

Okay, what? Third degree much?

- Have you been drinking?
- It's fine, okay?

- I get to drink because baby went gone!
- What?

"Gone, baby, gone."
Like that Ben Affleck movie.

That could be a sequel.

"Gone, Baby, Never Was."
Write that down.

- Oh, my God, Princess Carolyn.
- It's okay! You know me.

I always land on my feet.

Take a lickin', keep tickin'.

Like a lollipop with Tourette's.
Write that down.

So you were lying earlier at dinner?

Is that what you're upset about?

That I lied?

About losing the baby?
About keeping my apartment?

I lied? That's the big
sad thing that happened?

Trying to process what you threw at me.

It's gonna be fine. I'll be
pregnant again in no time.

I'm so sorry. Let me take you home.

- When you're ready to try again...
- I'm ready!

- I said I was ready.
- Okay.

So we'll go back to the doctor,
maybe talk about other options.

I don't need other options.
My mother had 12 kids.

My body was made for this.

We just gotta keep tick-tick-tickin'.

Princess Carolyn, I know you
wanna do this on your own,

but you've had two
miscarriages now, and...

- Five!
- What?

I've had five miscarriages.

One last year, now one,
and three others before.

- But it's whatever. It's okay.
- Why didn't you tell me?

Are you kidding? I don't want
you looking at me like that.

Like that! I know I can do this.

You can't keep stuff like
this from me. It's not okay.

- It's not about you.
- It is. This is about us.

You're not allowed to be mad at me.

- This is my bad day.
- It's our bad day.

It's so easy for you...

- To love me when everything's good.
- Princess Carolyn, I...

- Let me take you home.
- No.

You need to live in this.
You need to get used to this,

because if you're serious about having a

baby with me, this could happen again.

Are you prepared for that?

This could happen five more times.
But I'm ready for that.

Because I want this.
Do you want it that bad?

I just think

we should maybe talk
about other options.

Okay. Here's another option.

- Get out of my apartment!
- I'm sorry.

Get out! Save it for
your next girlfriend.

The one you can take
home to your parents.

The one who's easy.

Goodbye, Princess Carolyn.

What is it?

I'm calling about the offers.
I don't want to do 'em.

What's the point of being
famous if you wait in line?

If you could politely
decline on my behalf...

I do not work for you, BoJack!

I'm sorry. I started this all wrong.

How was your day?

- Well...
- Because mine was awful.

I mean, truly, one for the books.

Because I'm a good guy
trying to do the right thing.

First, I go for my breakfast Pinkberry,

which I had earned because I
had good intentions for today,

they're out of my favorite toppings!

So I go across the street to
Menchie's, like some kind of hobo.

Mm-hmm.

At Menchie's, the stupid teen that

worked there raised her eyebrows at me.

"You kidding me?
You're trying to judge me?

You have very uneven eyebrows
and you work at a Menchie's."

And don't even get me started
on the rancid internment camp

that is the L.A. County Courthouse.

Hey, you wanna know what I do

when I have a really bad,
awful, terrible day?

- What?
- I imagine my great

great-great granddaughter in the future

talking to her class about me.

She's poised and funny,
and tells people about me

and how everything
worked out in the end.

And when I think about that,

I think about how everything's
going to work out.

Because how else could she tell people?

But it's...

Fake.

Yeah, well...

It makes me feel better.

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