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1
00:00:02,524 --> 00:00:03,612
- PREVIOUSLY ON AWKWARD...
2
00:00:03,612 --> 00:00:05,092
A BARBECUE IS THE PERFECT WAY
3
00:00:05,092 --> 00:00:07,442
TO EASE THE WEIRDNESS.
- GO TO THE DAMN BARBECUE!
4
00:00:07,442 --> 00:00:09,270
- YOUR FRIENDS MIGHT NEED
SOME TIME TO ADJUST.
5
00:00:09,270 --> 00:00:10,923
- WHAT THEY NEED
IS TIME WITH YOU.
6
00:00:10,923 --> 00:00:13,230
- THEY'’RE NOT COMING.
- YOU ARE TOTALLY TAKING SIDES!
7
00:00:13,230 --> 00:00:14,797
- WE WEREN'’T TAKING SIDES,
BUT WE ARE NOW,
8
00:00:14,797 --> 00:00:16,712
AND WE ARE NOT ON YOURS.
9
00:00:21,673 --> 00:00:23,153
- POST DE-FRIENDING MY FRIENDS,
10
00:00:23,153 --> 00:00:26,852
MY LIFE HAD BECOME
A LITTLE...HAZY.
11
00:00:26,852 --> 00:00:28,506
I WAS CONSUMED WITH ANGER,
12
00:00:28,506 --> 00:00:34,469
DISAPPOINTMENT,
AND THE GIGGLES.
13
00:00:34,469 --> 00:00:35,861
- THIS STUFF IS CALLED
PARTY HARD-Y,
14
00:00:35,861 --> 00:00:37,341
BUT DON'’T LET
THE NAME FOOL YOU,
15
00:00:37,341 --> 00:00:38,951
BECAUSE IT'’S
SURPRISINGLY MELLOW.
16
00:00:41,606 --> 00:00:43,304
- I'’LL PASS.
I NEED A CLEAR HEAD.
17
00:00:43,304 --> 00:00:46,350
- FOR WHAT,
YOUR NEXT DIATRIBE
18
00:00:46,350 --> 00:00:48,831
ABOUT HOW MUCH
YOUR FRIENDS SUCK?
19
00:00:48,831 --> 00:00:51,616
- YES!
- COME ON.
20
00:00:51,616 --> 00:00:53,966
IT'’LL HELP SMOOTH YOU OUT.
21
00:00:53,966 --> 00:00:57,100
THEN WE CAN DISCUSS THE
POINTLESS NOTHINGNESS OF LIFE.
22
00:00:57,100 --> 00:00:59,363
- COLLIN WAS TRYING
TO CONVINCE ME TO MAKE THE JUMP
23
00:00:59,363 --> 00:01:01,974
FROM MY TRAUMA TRAIN
ONTO HIS GOOD TIME EXPRESS.
24
00:01:01,974 --> 00:01:05,543
SO WHAT WAS HOLDING ME BACK?
NOTHING.
25
00:01:05,543 --> 00:01:08,677
IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO EXHALE
THE HYPOCRISY OF MY FRIENDS,
26
00:01:08,677 --> 00:01:10,505
AND INHALE THE WONDERS
OF AN HERBAL LIFE.
27
00:01:10,505 --> 00:01:12,420
HIT ME.
28
00:01:17,164 --> 00:01:19,209
[coughing]
- YOU GOT IT.
29
00:01:19,209 --> 00:01:21,733
- WHILE MY ANXIETY HAD NOT YET
LEFT THE CAR,
30
00:01:21,733 --> 00:01:24,171
I WAS SUDDENLY READY
TO WAX POETIC
31
00:01:24,171 --> 00:01:26,912
ON THE TRIVIAL NATURE
OF BACKSTABBING FRIENDS.
32
00:01:26,912 --> 00:01:29,785
I WAS HOPEFULLY ABOUT
TO BE CALM, COOL, AND...
33
00:01:29,785 --> 00:01:32,962
[siren chirps]
34
00:01:32,962 --> 00:01:34,877
CONVICTED.
35
00:01:38,489 --> 00:01:40,491
- DO YOU REALIZE
HOW LUCKY YOU ARE
36
00:01:40,491 --> 00:01:42,754
THAT I WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL
WITH OFFICER MERCADO?
37
00:01:42,754 --> 00:01:45,453
AND THAT HE DROVE YOU HOME
INSTEAD OF THE STATION?
38
00:01:46,845 --> 00:01:48,760
- YES, DAD, I KNOW.
39
00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:51,415
EVIDENTLY, SOME HIGH SCHOOL
FRIENDS WERE WORTH KEEPING.
40
00:01:51,415 --> 00:01:53,200
- MM, DID YOU SAY HI
TO JERRY FOR ME?
41
00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:54,679
- LACE, I THINK KEEPING IT
SHORT AND SWEET
42
00:01:54,679 --> 00:01:56,333
WAS IN EVERYONE'’S
BEST INTERESTS.
43
00:01:56,333 --> 00:01:57,160
- SHOULD I GO TO MY ROOM NOW?
44
00:01:57,160 --> 00:01:59,684
both: NO!
45
00:01:59,684 --> 00:02:02,426
- NOW, WHAT DID YOU
LEARN TONIGHT?
46
00:02:02,426 --> 00:02:04,515
- I LEARNED TO MAKE FRIENDS
IN HIGH PLACES.
47
00:02:04,515 --> 00:02:06,735
- [laughs]
- WHAT'’S SO FUNNY?
48
00:02:06,735 --> 00:02:09,825
- SHE SAID, "HIGH PLACES."
49
00:02:09,825 --> 00:02:11,043
MM, OH, CHIPS?
50
00:02:11,043 --> 00:02:12,610
YES.
- [chuckles]
51
00:02:12,610 --> 00:02:16,701
- JENNA, DON'’T BE A SMARTASS.
52
00:02:16,701 --> 00:02:19,356
YOU WERE JUST CAUGHT
WITH AN ILLEGAL SUBSTANCE,
53
00:02:19,356 --> 00:02:20,966
WHICH YOU
SHOULD NOT BE SMOKING.
54
00:02:20,966 --> 00:02:22,925
- UNLESS YOU'’RE AT HOME.
55
00:02:22,925 --> 00:02:24,535
- I'’M CONFUSED.
56
00:02:24,535 --> 00:02:26,363
ARE YOU GUYS CONDONING
MY EXPERIMENTATION?
57
00:02:26,363 --> 00:02:27,538
- ABSOLUTELY NOT.
58
00:02:27,538 --> 00:02:29,061
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
SMART ENOUGH NOT--
59
00:02:29,061 --> 00:02:30,976
- TO GET CAUGHT.
[snorts]
60
00:02:33,065 --> 00:02:36,199
- WHAT'’S GOING ON HERE?
61
00:02:36,199 --> 00:02:38,941
- WE'’RE DISCIPLINING YOU.
62
00:02:38,941 --> 00:02:41,204
- WITHOUT BEING HYPOCRITES.
63
00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:44,990
- '’CAUSE YOU'’RE BOTH HIGH.
64
00:02:47,515 --> 00:02:49,517
- NO.
- YES.
65
00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:50,822
- WELL LISTEN, YOU DON'’T HAVE
TO WORRY ABOUT ME.
66
00:02:50,822 --> 00:02:52,868
I NEVER WANT TO BE IN THE BACK
OF A COP CAR AGAIN.
67
00:02:52,868 --> 00:02:54,913
IT WAS TRAUMATIC.
68
00:02:54,913 --> 00:02:58,178
IF I EVER DECIDE TO DO SOMETHING
DUMB, I WILL DO IT IN PRIVATE.
69
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,484
- NO! THE--
- GOOD! IT--
70
00:03:00,484 --> 00:03:03,357
- CAN I GO TO MY ROOM NOW?
both: YES.
71
00:03:03,357 --> 00:03:06,447
- BUT, UH,
LEAVE THE CHIPS.
72
00:03:06,447 --> 00:03:08,536
- AND NO TV FOR A MONTH!
73
00:03:08,536 --> 00:03:11,278
- NO TV FOR A MONTH?
- OR UNTIL I GET PREGNANT.
74
00:03:11,278 --> 00:03:14,019
I'’VE BEEN WATCHING DOCUMENTARIES
ON HOW INFRARED RADIO WAVES
75
00:03:14,019 --> 00:03:16,848
EMITTED FROM TV SCREENS
CAN INTERFERE WITH FERTILITY.
76
00:03:16,848 --> 00:03:20,678
- SO YOU'’RE WATCHING TELEVISION
ABOUT NOT WATCHING TELEVISION.
77
00:03:20,678 --> 00:03:22,202
THAT'’S REALLY SMART.
- I KNOW.
78
00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:24,421
[laughs] IT'’S SO MUCH EASIER
THAN READING A BOOK.
79
00:03:24,421 --> 00:03:26,815
- YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE A BABY.
- WHY?
80
00:03:26,815 --> 00:03:28,904
- THERE ARE A MULTITUDE
OF REASONS,
81
00:03:28,904 --> 00:03:30,340
BUT LET'’S START WITH
THE OBVIOUS.
82
00:03:30,340 --> 00:03:31,863
YOU'’RE A TRAIN WRECK.
83
00:03:31,863 --> 00:03:34,170
- [gasps]
IS THAT ANY WAY TO TALK
84
00:03:34,170 --> 00:03:37,086
TO THE WOMAN WHO IS RAISING YOU
WHILE YOUR MOM IS OUT OF TOWN?
85
00:03:37,086 --> 00:03:39,741
- UNCLE DAN IS PAYING YOU!
86
00:03:39,741 --> 00:03:42,700
- AND FOR GOOD REASON.
YOU'’RE A PAIN IN MY ASS.
87
00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:44,136
ALL YOU DO IS COMPLAIN
AND INSULT ME.
88
00:03:44,136 --> 00:03:45,529
IF YOU DON'’T WANT MY LOVE,
89
00:03:45,529 --> 00:03:47,618
THEN I'’LL JUST KEEP
THE LUNCH I MADE YOU.
90
00:03:47,618 --> 00:03:49,229
- NITRATES AND NICOTINE?
91
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:51,100
- CIGS ARE APPETITE
SUPPRESSANTS,
92
00:03:51,100 --> 00:03:52,928
AND THAT MEAT
IS PURE PROTEIN.
93
00:03:52,928 --> 00:03:55,235
PERSONALLY, I DON'’T FIND IT
ALL THAT APPETIZING,
94
00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:57,976
BUT THEN AGAIN, I'’M NOT THE ONE
WITH THE SLOW METABOLISM.
95
00:03:57,976 --> 00:04:00,936
- SLUT.
- BITCH.
96
00:04:00,936 --> 00:04:04,244
HAVE A GOOD DAY, SWEETIE!
97
00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:05,941
- AFTER MY CLOSE CALL
WITH THE LAW,
98
00:04:05,941 --> 00:04:07,290
ALL THE PROBLEMS
WITH TAMARA AND MING
99
00:04:07,290 --> 00:04:08,944
SEEMED LIKE PETTY MISDEMEANORS.
100
00:04:08,944 --> 00:04:11,294
AND EVEN THOUGH
I WANTED AN APOLOGY,
101
00:04:11,294 --> 00:04:15,603
MY BIGGER NEED WAS TO SHARE
MY NIGHTMARE WITH WEED...
102
00:04:15,603 --> 00:04:17,344
AND FIND OUT
WHO THE HELL WAS SO
103
00:04:17,344 --> 00:04:19,302
UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL
WITH MATTY.
104
00:04:21,739 --> 00:04:24,046
IS MATTY DATING SOMEONE NEW?
105
00:04:24,046 --> 00:04:25,874
- YOU DON'’T GET TO ASK
WHO MATTY IS DATING.
106
00:04:25,874 --> 00:04:28,006
- BUT HER NAME IS DEVON.
ARE YOU "DEVON-STATED"?
107
00:04:28,006 --> 00:04:29,965
- NO.
MATTY CAN DO WHATEVER HE WANTS.
108
00:04:29,965 --> 00:04:32,010
- BUT YOU CAN'’T!
109
00:04:32,010 --> 00:04:34,535
WHAT ARE YOU DOING RIGHT NOW
WITH THIS "NONCHALANT-ITUDE"?
110
00:04:34,535 --> 00:04:36,363
YOU'’RE NOT WELCOME
IN OUR WALK AND TALK.
111
00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:38,060
- LOOKIT, I ALMOST GOT ARRESTED
IN COLLINS'’S CAR LAST NIGHT,
112
00:04:38,060 --> 00:04:40,018
SO JUST GIVE ME A BREAK.
113
00:04:40,018 --> 00:04:41,846
- WHILE YOUR PARK'’N'’NARC
SOUNDS REALLY INTERESTING,
114
00:04:41,846 --> 00:04:44,109
AND SO FITTING WITH
YOUR NEW PERSONALITY--
115
00:04:44,109 --> 00:04:46,764
- WE DON'’T WANT TO HEAR IT.
- IN FACT, WE DON'’T WANT TO HEAR
116
00:04:46,764 --> 00:04:48,070
ANYTHING BUT A BIG, FAT,
"I'’M SORRY."
117
00:04:48,070 --> 00:04:49,767
BECAUSE IF YOU THINK
WE'’RE GONNA FORGET
118
00:04:49,767 --> 00:04:52,640
YOUR CRAZY-ASS AGRO-YEXTING,
YOU'’RE WRONG.
119
00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:54,294
- NOBODY LIKES A YELL TEXT.
120
00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:55,686
- I DID NOT YELL TEXT.
121
00:04:55,686 --> 00:04:57,645
- THEN EXPLAIN THIS.
122
00:04:57,645 --> 00:04:58,820
"DISLOYAL."
123
00:04:58,820 --> 00:05:00,082
- EXCLAMATION.
- "UNSUPPORTIVE."
124
00:05:00,082 --> 00:05:01,170
- EXCLAMATION.
125
00:05:01,170 --> 00:05:02,693
- "DISLOYAL" AGAIN.
126
00:05:02,693 --> 00:05:04,695
- EXCLAMATION.
- OH, AND "TRAITOR,"
127
00:05:04,695 --> 00:05:07,872
SPELLED "T-R-8-E-R."
128
00:05:07,872 --> 00:05:09,265
- '’CAUSE YOU WERE ANGRY,
AND IN A HURRY.
129
00:05:09,265 --> 00:05:12,486
- OKAY, SO MAYBE I WAS YEXTING,
BUT I WAS FEELING A LITTLE--
130
00:05:12,486 --> 00:05:14,183
both: BETRAYED!
- EXCLAMATION.
131
00:05:14,183 --> 00:05:16,533
- DID YOU EVER THINK
THAT MAYBE OUR NO-SHOW
132
00:05:16,533 --> 00:05:18,318
HAD NOTHING
TO DO WITH COLLIN,
133
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:21,059
AND MAYBE WE HAD A GOOD REASON
FOR NOT COMING TO YOUR BARBECUE?
134
00:05:21,059 --> 00:05:22,539
AND WE WERE GOING
TO EXPLAIN IT TO YOU,
135
00:05:22,539 --> 00:05:23,932
BUT YOU DIDN'’T
GIVE US A CHANCE
136
00:05:23,932 --> 00:05:25,673
BEFORE YOUR "PISS-APPOINTED"
TIRADE BEGAN?
137
00:05:25,673 --> 00:05:28,545
- TAMARA AND JAKE ALMOST BROKE
UP OVER YOUR DANGEROUS LIAISON.
138
00:05:28,545 --> 00:05:31,548
- EXCLAMATION!
JAKE WAS FURIOUS
139
00:05:31,548 --> 00:05:32,984
I DIDN'’T TELL HIM
YOU WERE HAVING AN AFFAIR.
140
00:05:32,984 --> 00:05:35,073
YOU KNOW WHY
I DIDN'’T TELL HIM?
141
00:05:35,073 --> 00:05:36,336
'’CAUSE OF GIRL CODE,
142
00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:37,946
WHICH CLEARLY
MEANS NOTHING TO YOU.
143
00:05:37,946 --> 00:05:39,251
- WELL, LUCKILY FOR YOU,
144
00:05:39,251 --> 00:05:41,123
GIRL CODE DOESN'’T APPLY
TO EX-FRIENDS.
145
00:05:41,123 --> 00:05:43,604
- GREAT! '’CAUSE IT WAS
EXHAUSTING BEING YOUR FRIEND!
146
00:05:43,604 --> 00:05:45,388
- OH, AND YOU'’RE
SUCH A DREAM?
147
00:05:45,388 --> 00:05:47,390
GOD, I AM SO GLAD I DON'’T HAVE
TO LISTEN TO YOUR ENDLESS
148
00:05:47,390 --> 00:05:49,566
AND HOPELESS QUEST
TO BE POPULAR.
149
00:05:49,566 --> 00:05:51,002
WAY TO SET
YOUR GOALS HIGH, "T."
150
00:05:51,002 --> 00:05:55,180
- DON'’T "T" ME.
YOU KNOW WHAT, JENNA?
151
00:05:55,180 --> 00:05:58,227
TAKE CARE!
152
00:05:58,227 --> 00:05:59,707
- YOU TAKE CARE!
153
00:05:59,707 --> 00:06:03,406
- SO YOU GUYS ARE BACK
ON GOOD TERMS.
154
00:06:03,406 --> 00:06:06,104
HEY, LOOK, WHY DON'’T WE GET OUT
OF DODGE AND TAKE THE EDGE OFF?
155
00:06:06,104 --> 00:06:07,454
- YOU WANT TO DITCH?
- OR SKIP.
156
00:06:07,454 --> 00:06:09,020
IT'’S ALL JUST SEMANTICS.
157
00:06:09,020 --> 00:06:10,761
- I REALLY DON'’T WANT
TO PUSH MY LUCK TODAY.
158
00:06:10,761 --> 00:06:12,546
- SPREAD '’EM!
159
00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:16,419
JENNA HAMILTON, YOU'’RE UNDER
ARREST FOR SKIPPING SCHOOL.
160
00:06:16,419 --> 00:06:20,510
YOU HAVE THE RIGHT
TO REMAIN SILENT.
161
00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:22,120
- ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME?
162
00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:24,949
- A LITTLE.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
163
00:06:24,949 --> 00:06:27,517
MAYBE WE SHOULD PICK THIS UP
AFTER SCHOOL.
164
00:06:27,517 --> 00:06:29,519
- ARE YOU AFRAID OF P.D.A.?
165
00:06:29,519 --> 00:06:31,826
- NO, I JUST...
166
00:06:31,826 --> 00:06:33,131
I JUST DON'’T THINK
IT'’S APPROPRIATE FOR ME
167
00:06:33,131 --> 00:06:35,917
TO FRISK YOU HERE IN PUBLIC.
168
00:06:35,917 --> 00:06:37,658
- WHY?
169
00:06:37,658 --> 00:06:39,921
- BECAUSE I LIKE TO DO
A THOROUGH JOB.
170
00:06:39,921 --> 00:06:43,098
- COLLIN WAS ATTEMPTING
TO DISTRACT ME FROM MY DRAMA,
171
00:06:43,098 --> 00:06:45,753
AND WITH THAT DISTRACTION,
LUCKILY CAME SOME ACTION.
172
00:06:45,753 --> 00:06:47,668
THE DAY COULD NOT END
SOON ENOUGH.
173
00:06:47,668 --> 00:06:49,104
- IT'’S OVER.
174
00:06:49,104 --> 00:06:51,498
I DON'’T HAVE ANY MORE
DOCTOR'’S VISITS.
175
00:06:51,498 --> 00:06:53,413
- BUT YOUR NECK IS CROOKED.
176
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,763
- IT'’S JUST A LITTLE KINK.
IT'’LL STRAIGHTEN OUT.
177
00:06:55,763 --> 00:06:58,243
I THINK.
- UGH, GROSS.
178
00:06:58,243 --> 00:06:59,723
- DOES IT LOOK THAT BAD?
179
00:06:59,723 --> 00:07:02,596
- NOT YOUR NECK.
RENTAL PROPERTIES.
180
00:07:02,596 --> 00:07:03,945
I FEEL POOR.
181
00:07:03,945 --> 00:07:06,469
- YOU ARE POOR.
182
00:07:06,469 --> 00:07:08,166
WHEN DOES YOUR MOM GET BACK
FROM EXHAUSTION CAMP?
183
00:07:08,166 --> 00:07:10,734
- TONIGHT, THANK GOD!
I DON'’T KNOW WHAT'’S WORSE,
184
00:07:10,734 --> 00:07:12,780
LIVING ON A BUDGET,
OR WITH A BITCH!
185
00:07:12,780 --> 00:07:14,259
- I'’D SAY THE BUDGET,
186
00:07:14,259 --> 00:07:17,741
'’CAUSE YOU LIVE
WITH YOURSELF EVERY DAY.
187
00:07:17,741 --> 00:07:19,569
- HEY.
- JACQUES, I'’M SORRY.
188
00:07:19,569 --> 00:07:20,962
AND I KNOW YOU'’RE SORRY,
189
00:07:20,962 --> 00:07:22,398
AND I REALLY DON'’T WANT
TO FIGHT ANYMORE.
190
00:07:22,398 --> 00:07:24,008
I SHOULD HAVE TOLD YOU
JENNA WAS A RANKSKANK,
191
00:07:24,008 --> 00:07:25,836
BUT I WAS TRYING
TO PROTECT GIRL CODE.
192
00:07:25,836 --> 00:07:28,491
I JUST CAN'’T TAKE FIGHTING WITH
YOU AND HER AT THE SAME TIME,
193
00:07:28,491 --> 00:07:30,058
SO PLEASE LET'’S NOT FIGHT.
194
00:07:30,058 --> 00:07:31,799
- I DIDN'’T REALIZE
WE WERE STILL FIGHTING.
195
00:07:35,542 --> 00:07:37,413
- HEY.
196
00:07:37,413 --> 00:07:38,849
- HEY.
HELLO, DEVON.
197
00:07:38,849 --> 00:07:40,982
- HEY.
- WHAT'’S GOING ON?
198
00:07:40,982 --> 00:07:42,244
- JUST TRYING TO GET RID
OF MY ANGER TOWARDS JENNA,
199
00:07:42,244 --> 00:07:43,680
BUT THAT'’S NOT HAPPENING.
200
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,203
- IS THAT WHY
SHE'’S SITTING BY HERSELF?
201
00:07:45,203 --> 00:07:47,858
- DON'’T FEEL BAD FOR HER.
- OKAY.
202
00:07:47,858 --> 00:07:49,991
- DON'’T, MATTY.
- BUT IT'’S JENNA.
203
00:07:49,991 --> 00:07:51,906
- "EXSQUEEZE" ME,
THAT'’S NOT JENNA.
204
00:07:51,906 --> 00:07:53,603
THAT'’S THE GIRL
THAT CHEATED ON YOU,
205
00:07:53,603 --> 00:07:55,213
NOT TO MENTION,
THAT GIRL ALMOST GOT ARRESTED.
206
00:07:55,213 --> 00:07:56,911
- SHE GOT ARRESTED?
207
00:07:56,911 --> 00:07:58,347
- SHE ALMOST DID.
SAME THING.
208
00:07:58,347 --> 00:08:00,784
- IF YOU WANT
TO TALK TO HER, GO.
209
00:08:00,784 --> 00:08:02,133
- YOU SURE?
- YOU STILL CARE ABOUT HER.
210
00:08:02,133 --> 00:08:04,222
WHICH TOTALLY MAKES SENSE.
211
00:08:04,222 --> 00:08:05,528
IF YOU DIDN'’T,
YOU WOULDN'’T BE NEARLY AS CUTE.
212
00:08:09,706 --> 00:08:10,838
- [sighs]
213
00:08:10,838 --> 00:08:12,013
both: BIG MISTAKE.
214
00:08:12,013 --> 00:08:14,755
- I AM SORRY,
BUT I HAVE TO.
215
00:08:22,893 --> 00:08:26,680
- HI.
- HI.
216
00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:28,464
- IS EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?
217
00:08:28,464 --> 00:08:31,641
HEARD YOU GOT ARRESTED.
218
00:08:31,641 --> 00:08:33,034
- BITCHES.
219
00:08:33,034 --> 00:08:34,470
- COME ON, THEY'’RE JUST
WORRIED ABOUT YOU.
220
00:08:34,470 --> 00:08:36,385
AND SO AM I.
THIS ISN'’T YOU.
221
00:08:36,385 --> 00:08:38,039
- NO, THIS IS ME.
222
00:08:38,039 --> 00:08:39,170
THEY SHOULD MIND
THEIR OWN BUSINESS,
223
00:08:39,170 --> 00:08:41,521
AND FRANKLY,
SO SHOULD YOU.
224
00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,697
SO GO BACK TO SLUMMING IT
WITH YOUR REBOUND SKANK.
225
00:08:49,485 --> 00:08:51,400
- GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT,
JENNA.
226
00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:54,055
I WAS SLUMMING IT WITH YOU.
227
00:08:54,055 --> 00:08:59,147
- ♪ WITHIN YOUR BOWL
OF WISDOM ♪
228
00:08:59,147 --> 00:09:01,105
- MY LIFE
AS I KNEW IT WAS OVER.
229
00:09:01,105 --> 00:09:03,586
SO THERE WAS ONLY
ONE THING TO DO--
230
00:09:03,586 --> 00:09:05,545
REMOVE MYSELF
FROM THE SITUATION,
231
00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:08,199
AND MY "JENN-EMIES."
232
00:09:08,199 --> 00:09:09,940
- ♪YOU THINK YOU HAVE
A KINGDOM... ♪
233
00:09:09,940 --> 00:09:11,638
- WHICH WAS EASIER SAID
THAN DONE.
234
00:09:18,993 --> 00:09:20,168
- WHAT ARE THEY DOING HERE?
235
00:09:20,168 --> 00:09:22,518
- ALLY HAD A FIGHT WITH DAN.
- AGAIN?
236
00:09:22,518 --> 00:09:24,433
DID HE FINALLY REALIZE YOU'’RE
DRAINING HIS BANK ACCOUNT?
237
00:09:24,433 --> 00:09:27,088
- NO, I'’M TRYING TO DRAIN HIM,
FOR A BABY.
238
00:09:27,088 --> 00:09:29,264
- BUT HE WISELY DOESN'’T
WANT ONE.
239
00:09:29,264 --> 00:09:31,266
- GOD, IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL
FOR YOU TO HAVE A BABY.
240
00:09:31,266 --> 00:09:33,094
- AND YOU,
LITTLE BITCH,
241
00:09:33,094 --> 00:09:34,574
ARE THE BEST ARGUMENT
FOR ABORTION.
242
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:37,185
- AGREED.
- I'’M GOING TO MY ROOM.
243
00:09:40,971 --> 00:09:45,628
- WHAT'’S UP HER BUTT?
- SHE'’S JUST...IN A MOOD.
244
00:09:45,628 --> 00:09:47,151
HON?
245
00:09:47,151 --> 00:09:49,632
WOULD YOU PUT YOUR HEADPHONES ON
SO THE ADULTS CAN TALK?
246
00:09:49,632 --> 00:09:52,983
- ARE YOU TWO THE ADULTS?
247
00:09:52,983 --> 00:09:54,985
- AFTER GETTING RUBBED WRONG
THROUGH THE DAY,
248
00:09:54,985 --> 00:09:57,858
I WAS FINALLY READY
TO GET RUBBED RIGHT.
249
00:10:09,043 --> 00:10:10,740
- UGH, WISH THAT COP
HADN'’T TAKEN MY STASH.
250
00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:12,742
- SORRY.
251
00:10:12,742 --> 00:10:14,788
ACTUALLY, I THINK
I MIGHT BE ABLE
252
00:10:14,788 --> 00:10:15,963
TO FIND SOMETHING
TO HOLD YOU OVER.
253
00:10:15,963 --> 00:10:17,529
- REALLY?
WHERE?
254
00:10:17,529 --> 00:10:19,967
- MY VAG!
255
00:10:19,967 --> 00:10:23,361
IT'’S A LEMON, LACE.
AND FREAKIN'’ IRONIC.
256
00:10:23,361 --> 00:10:25,842
TO THINK ABOUT ALL THE TIME
I SPENT SWEATING GETTING PREGGO.
257
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,365
- OH.
- NOT TO MENTION ALL THE MONEY
258
00:10:27,365 --> 00:10:29,541
I SHELLED OUT ON PROPECIA
WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS.
259
00:10:29,541 --> 00:10:31,282
[laughs]
260
00:10:31,282 --> 00:10:33,328
AND NOW THE DREAM IS DONE.
261
00:10:33,328 --> 00:10:35,722
- THAT IS NONSENSE.
ADOPT.
262
00:10:35,722 --> 00:10:37,941
- ADOPTING DEFEATS THE POINT.
263
00:10:37,941 --> 00:10:40,422
I ONLY WANT A KID
I CAN SCREW UP FROM THE START.
264
00:10:40,422 --> 00:10:42,250
- OH, THIS MAY BE
A BLESSING, AL.
265
00:10:42,250 --> 00:10:45,732
BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, THAT BABY
WILL HOT BOX A CAR
266
00:10:45,732 --> 00:10:47,559
AND ALMOST GET ARRESTED.
267
00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:49,083
- JENNA GOT ARRESTED?
268
00:10:49,083 --> 00:10:51,041
- [sputters]
- SADIE.
269
00:10:51,041 --> 00:10:53,435
WHY DON'’T YOU GO HANG OUT
WITH LITTLE BITCH?
270
00:10:53,435 --> 00:10:55,959
- BECAUSE SHE'’S
A BAD INFLUENCE ON ME.
271
00:10:55,959 --> 00:10:57,134
I'’M APPALLED
THAT YOU WOULD TELL ME
272
00:10:57,134 --> 00:10:59,267
TO GO HANG OUT
WITH A DELINQUENT.
273
00:10:59,267 --> 00:11:01,443
KIND OF A POOR PARENTING
DECISION, AL.
274
00:11:01,443 --> 00:11:03,445
- THEN GO DO YOUR HOMEWORK
IN MY ROOM.
275
00:11:07,188 --> 00:11:08,885
- I'’M GONNA SMOTHER HER
WITH A PILLOW TONIGHT.
276
00:11:18,068 --> 00:11:19,200
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?
277
00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:22,116
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?
278
00:11:22,116 --> 00:11:24,248
STEALING YOUR PARENTS'’
STOCKPILE.
279
00:11:24,248 --> 00:11:25,685
MUST BE A NEW LOW.
280
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:27,599
- MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
281
00:11:27,599 --> 00:11:30,646
- LOSER GIRL BECOMES
A LOSER BURNOUT.
282
00:11:30,646 --> 00:11:32,909
YOU ARE SUCH A CLICHE.
283
00:11:32,909 --> 00:11:34,389
- GIVE IT A REST.
- WHY?
284
00:11:34,389 --> 00:11:35,999
DID I HIT A NERVE?
285
00:11:35,999 --> 00:11:38,001
- NOTHING YOU SAY COULD EVER
GET UNDER MY SKIN.
286
00:11:38,001 --> 00:11:40,612
- GOOD!
THEN I'’LL LEAVE YOU WITH THIS.
287
00:11:40,612 --> 00:11:43,964
COLLIN IS GONNA LEAVE YOU
HIGH AND DRY,
288
00:11:43,964 --> 00:11:45,095
JUST LIKE YOU DID WITH MATTY,
289
00:11:45,095 --> 00:11:47,794
BECAUSE WHAT GOES AROUND,
COMES AROUND,
290
00:11:47,794 --> 00:11:49,665
AND KARMA'’S A BITCH.
291
00:11:49,665 --> 00:11:51,275
- IS THAT WHY
YOU'’RE BROKE AND HOMELESS?
292
00:11:55,453 --> 00:11:59,240
- AM I SUPPOSED TO FORBID HER
TO S--[sighs]
293
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:00,807
NEED SOMETHING?
294
00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:02,634
- NO, I JUST DIDN'’T WANT
TO GET IN JENNA'’S WAY.
295
00:12:02,634 --> 00:12:04,071
SHE SEEMS REALLY BUSY.
296
00:12:04,071 --> 00:12:05,507
- DOING WHAT?
297
00:12:05,507 --> 00:12:07,117
- SWIPING YOUR STASH.
298
00:12:10,294 --> 00:12:12,427
- SO NOW YOU'’RE STEALING?
- IT'’S MORE LIKE BORROWING.
299
00:12:12,427 --> 00:12:13,994
BESIDES, MOM SAID
IF I NEEDED TO SMOKE,
300
00:12:13,994 --> 00:12:15,909
I COULD SMOKE
INSIDE THE HOUSE.
301
00:12:15,909 --> 00:12:17,171
- I DID SAY THAT.
302
00:12:17,171 --> 00:12:19,173
[phone chirps]
303
00:12:19,173 --> 00:12:20,261
- OH, I'’M SORRY.
304
00:12:20,261 --> 00:12:21,871
ARE WE INTERRUPTING SOMETHING?
305
00:12:21,871 --> 00:12:23,830
- THAT'’S MY PHONE!
- ACTUALLY, IT'’S MINE,
306
00:12:23,830 --> 00:12:25,570
BECAUSE I BOUGHT IT
AND I PAY THE BILLS.
307
00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:28,835
COLLIN WAS OVER HERE TODAY?
308
00:12:28,835 --> 00:12:29,966
- HE STOPPED BY AFTER SCHOOL.
309
00:12:29,966 --> 00:12:31,663
- THAT KID
IS A BAD INFLUENCE.
310
00:12:31,663 --> 00:12:32,664
- YOU DON'’T EVEN KNOW HIM.
311
00:12:32,664 --> 00:12:33,927
- OH, I KNOW ENOUGH!
312
00:12:33,927 --> 00:12:35,885
I DON'’T WANT YOU SEEING HIM
ANYMORE.
313
00:12:35,885 --> 00:12:37,234
- KEV, LET'’S NOT--
314
00:12:37,234 --> 00:12:39,019
- GO TO YOUR ROOM.
315
00:12:41,586 --> 00:12:43,850
NOT YOU.
316
00:12:45,982 --> 00:12:48,637
IT'’S MINE.
317
00:12:51,161 --> 00:12:53,642
[sighs]
318
00:12:53,642 --> 00:12:56,601
- MY PARENTS'’ HYPOCRISY
WAS AT AN ALL-TIME HIGH.
319
00:12:56,601 --> 00:12:58,342
NO PUN INTENDED.
320
00:12:58,342 --> 00:13:00,518
MY TOP DRAWER SCORE
HAD SENT MY DAD PACING.
321
00:13:00,518 --> 00:13:02,825
AND MY MOM, STRANGELY...
[knock at door]
322
00:13:03,913 --> 00:13:05,959
TO MY RESCUE.
323
00:13:05,959 --> 00:13:08,483
- I THOUGHT YOUR DAD WAS BEING
A LITTLE TOO HARSH.
324
00:13:08,483 --> 00:13:11,703
I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT
I KNOW YOU'’RE A GOOD KID,
325
00:13:11,703 --> 00:13:14,706
AND I TRUST YOU.
- THANK YOU.
326
00:13:14,706 --> 00:13:15,795
- CAN YOU DO ME A FAVOR?
327
00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:17,100
- SURE.
328
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:19,276
- JUST LAY LOW
ON THE COLLIN FRONT
329
00:13:19,276 --> 00:13:22,149
FOR A FEW DAYS,
TILL THIS BLOWS OVER.
330
00:13:22,149 --> 00:13:24,673
CAN YOU DO THAT?
- NOT A PROBLEM.
331
00:13:24,673 --> 00:13:27,371
- OKAY.
332
00:13:31,723 --> 00:13:34,770
[buttons clicking]
333
00:13:34,770 --> 00:13:38,469
- HEY, CAN YOU PICK ME UP?
334
00:13:38,469 --> 00:13:40,341
PERFECT.
335
00:13:40,341 --> 00:13:41,908
AND DON'’T COME
TO THE FRONT DOOR,
336
00:13:41,908 --> 00:13:43,518
JUST TEXT ME
WHEN YOU GET HERE.
337
00:13:51,221 --> 00:13:52,614
- I JUST
DON'’T UNDERSTAND, YOU KNOW?
338
00:13:52,614 --> 00:13:55,051
- MM-HMM.
339
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:56,226
- WHY DOESN'’T
MY DAD TRUST ME?
340
00:13:56,226 --> 00:13:57,488
FIRST MY FRIENDS,
AND NOW MY DAD?
341
00:13:57,488 --> 00:14:00,143
ARE ALL MY RELATIONSHIPS
CONDITIONAL NOW?
342
00:14:00,143 --> 00:14:03,712
- IT'’S NOT FAIR.
- [sighs]
343
00:14:03,712 --> 00:14:05,496
PEOPLE BREAK UP, BUT YOUR
FRIENDS ARE SUPPOSED TO STAY
344
00:14:05,496 --> 00:14:06,889
ON YOUR SIDE,
NOT START HANGING OUT
345
00:14:06,889 --> 00:14:08,499
WITH YOUR EX'’S
NEW SOCCER SLUT.
346
00:14:08,499 --> 00:14:10,893
DID I TELL YOU THAT DEVON
PLAYS SOCCER TOO?
347
00:14:10,893 --> 00:14:11,981
HE WAS PROBABLY FLIRTING
WITH HER
348
00:14:11,981 --> 00:14:13,287
WHILE WE WERE STILL TOGETHER.
349
00:14:13,287 --> 00:14:15,245
THAT WOULD EXPLAIN
WHY HE MOVED ON SO FAST.
350
00:14:15,245 --> 00:14:17,073
- HEY, THIS IS THE FIFTH TIME
351
00:14:17,073 --> 00:14:19,119
YOU'’VE BROUGHT UP MATTY
AND YOUR FRIENDS.
352
00:14:19,119 --> 00:14:20,511
YOU'’RE STARTING TO FIXATE.
353
00:14:20,511 --> 00:14:23,123
- I'’M--I'’M NOT FIXATING.
- TALK TO THEM.
354
00:14:23,123 --> 00:14:26,387
OR DON'’T TALK TO THEM, BUT...
355
00:14:26,387 --> 00:14:28,345
MAYBE YOU SHOULD
QUIT TALKING ABOUT IT.
356
00:14:28,345 --> 00:14:30,130
- I'’M NEVER TALKING
TO THEM AGAIN.
357
00:14:30,130 --> 00:14:32,654
- SO LET IT GO.
358
00:14:32,654 --> 00:14:35,004
HEY...
359
00:14:35,004 --> 00:14:39,487
HOW ABOUT WE TAKE
YOUR MIND OFF OF THIS?
360
00:14:43,230 --> 00:14:47,756
- THEY JUST DON'’T UNDERSTAND.
361
00:14:47,756 --> 00:14:50,628
- MAYBE I SHOULD TAKE YOU HOME
SO YOU CAN DEAL WITH THIS.
362
00:14:50,628 --> 00:14:53,544
- NO. NO, NO, NO.
I'’M SORRY.
363
00:14:53,544 --> 00:14:55,372
I'’LL SHUT UP NOW.
364
00:14:55,372 --> 00:14:57,940
- MOM, YOU LOOK GREAT!
- I'’M ECSTATIC.
365
00:14:57,940 --> 00:14:59,681
- BECAUSE YOU FINALLY
GOT SOME REST?
366
00:14:59,681 --> 00:15:01,378
- OH, HARDLY.
367
00:15:01,378 --> 00:15:03,903
- BUT WASN'’T THAT THE POINT
OF EXHAUSTION CAMP?
368
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:05,295
- OH, IT WAS A SPA, HONEY.
369
00:15:05,295 --> 00:15:07,471
AND I WAS ONLY THERE
FOR A WEEK THIS TIME.
370
00:15:07,471 --> 00:15:10,039
- BUT YOU'’VE BEEN GONE
FOR ALMOST A MONTH.
371
00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:11,562
- YEAH, WHERE THE HELL
HAVE YOU BEEN?
372
00:15:11,562 --> 00:15:14,783
- SANTA FE.
- WHAT THE HELL IS IN SANTA FE?
373
00:15:14,783 --> 00:15:17,438
- MY BOYFRIEND.
- SO FOR WEEKS,
374
00:15:17,438 --> 00:15:18,395
I'’VE BEEN LEFT ALONE
WHILE YOU'’VE BEEN
375
00:15:18,395 --> 00:15:20,180
SHACKING UP WITH SOME HIPPY?
376
00:15:20,180 --> 00:15:21,746
- YOU WEREN'’T LEFT ALONE.
377
00:15:21,746 --> 00:15:25,402
YOU HAD CONSUELA, AND UNCLE DAN,
AND...ABBY.
378
00:15:25,402 --> 00:15:28,144
- ALLY.
- AND FRANCOIS IS NOT A HIPPY.
379
00:15:28,144 --> 00:15:29,711
HE'’S A HEALER.
380
00:15:29,711 --> 00:15:32,366
- WELL, HE'’S NOT LIVING WITH US.
- THAT'’S RIGHT,
381
00:15:32,366 --> 00:15:36,152
BECAUSE WE ARE GOING TO BE
LIVING WITH HIM IN SANTA FE.
382
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:39,851
- OVER MY DEAD BODY.
NO WAY!
383
00:15:39,851 --> 00:15:42,202
- ARE YOU REALLY
GONNA MAKE THIS ABOUT YOU?
384
00:15:42,202 --> 00:15:44,944
AGAIN?
CUT ME SOME SLACK.
385
00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:47,511
[sighs] I'’M THE ONE
WHO'’S LOST EVERYTHING.
386
00:15:47,511 --> 00:15:48,860
- OH, AND I LOST NOTHING?
387
00:15:48,860 --> 00:15:49,992
- ACTUALLY, YOU LOST
THREE POUNDS
388
00:15:49,992 --> 00:15:51,341
FROM THE LUNCHES I MADE YOU.
389
00:15:51,341 --> 00:15:52,821
- I THOUGHT WHEN YOU GOT BACK
390
00:15:52,821 --> 00:15:55,258
WE COULD SPEND
SOME TIME TOGETHER.
391
00:15:55,258 --> 00:15:57,130
- OF COURSE.
392
00:15:57,130 --> 00:15:59,697
IT'’S JUST GONNA BE
THE TWO OF US...
393
00:15:59,697 --> 00:16:00,960
ON THE PLANE.
394
00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,614
NOW GO GET YOUR THINGS.
395
00:16:03,614 --> 00:16:05,094
- I THINK I'’D RATHER
STAY HERE TONIGHT.
396
00:16:05,094 --> 00:16:06,400
- SADIE.
- IT'’S OKAY.
397
00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,532
I CAN TAKE HER TO SCHOOL.
398
00:16:08,532 --> 00:16:10,839
- FINE.
399
00:16:10,839 --> 00:16:13,320
SADIE, I WILL MEET YOU
AT SCHOOL TOMORROW,
400
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:17,237
AND WE CAN SIGN
THE TRANSFER PAPERS.
401
00:16:17,237 --> 00:16:20,240
- [bleep] ME.
402
00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:33,470
- ARE YOU STILL THINKING
ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS?
403
00:16:33,470 --> 00:16:35,951
- NO.
AND I WASN'’T.
404
00:16:35,951 --> 00:16:38,649
I HAD FINALLY LEFT MY HEAD
AND WAS STARTING TO PROCESS
405
00:16:38,649 --> 00:16:40,260
HOW FAR WE'’D GOTTEN
IN COLLIN'’S BED.
406
00:16:40,260 --> 00:16:42,131
- HEY, WE DON'’T HAVE TO DO THIS.
407
00:16:42,131 --> 00:16:45,613
- I DIDN'’T KNOW IF I WAS READY
TO ADD ANOTHER NOTCH TO MY BELT,
408
00:16:45,613 --> 00:16:47,745
OR IF I EVEN WANTED TO.
409
00:16:47,745 --> 00:16:49,617
- YOU DON'’T WANT TO,
410
00:16:49,617 --> 00:16:52,011
AND I DON'’T WANT TO
UNLESS YOU DO.
411
00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:53,403
SO IT'’S COOL.
412
00:16:53,403 --> 00:16:54,926
- BUT IT WASN'’T COOL,
413
00:16:54,926 --> 00:16:56,754
AND I DIDN'’T WANT
TO LOSE COLLIN.
414
00:16:56,754 --> 00:16:59,235
I COULDN'’T LOSE COLLIN.
415
00:16:59,235 --> 00:17:02,630
SO I HAD TO DO
WHAT I HAD TO DO TO KEEP HIM.
416
00:17:02,630 --> 00:17:04,545
HEY.
417
00:17:08,114 --> 00:17:11,421
DO YOU HAVE A CONDOM?
418
00:17:11,421 --> 00:17:13,641
- ARE YOU SURE?
- YEAH, I'’M SURE.
419
00:17:29,439 --> 00:17:32,268
I HAD JUST HAD MY FIRST
AFTER MY FIRST,
420
00:17:32,268 --> 00:17:34,227
AND I NEEDED TO ADDRESS
THE UNDRESSING.
421
00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:41,103
I REALLY NEED TO TALK.
422
00:17:44,063 --> 00:17:48,676
- I AM DONE TALKING.
423
00:17:48,676 --> 00:17:49,546
- MOM, PLEASE,
JUST LET ME SAY SOMETHING--
424
00:17:49,546 --> 00:17:51,331
- NO, STOP.
YOU NEED TO LISTEN.
425
00:17:51,331 --> 00:17:55,204
I DEFENDED YOU.
I TRUSTED YOU.
426
00:17:55,204 --> 00:17:57,467
AND YOU BROKE THAT TRUST.
427
00:17:57,467 --> 00:17:59,208
- I KNOW,
BUT I CAN EXPLAIN.
428
00:17:59,208 --> 00:18:01,384
- EXPLAIN IT TO YOUR DAD
WHEN YOU WAKE HIM UP
429
00:18:01,384 --> 00:18:04,909
AND YOU TELL HIM
THAT YOU SNUCK OUT!
430
00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:08,130
JENNA, GO.
NOW!
431
00:18:13,744 --> 00:18:15,006
- HONESTLY, I'’M SHOCKED...
432
00:18:15,006 --> 00:18:17,270
AND THRILLED
YOU'’RE TRANSFERRING!
433
00:18:19,185 --> 00:18:21,012
WE ARE REALLY
GONNA MISS YOU.
434
00:18:21,012 --> 00:18:23,841
- I WANT TO EMANCIPATE.
435
00:18:23,841 --> 00:18:26,496
- SORRY TO INTERRUPT.
SADIE, YOU FORGOT YOUR LUNCH
436
00:18:26,496 --> 00:18:28,846
AND YOUR ANXIETY MEDS.
- KEEP IT.
437
00:18:28,846 --> 00:18:31,022
- EMANCIPATING ISN'’T ACTUALLY
AS EASY AS IT SOUNDS.
438
00:18:31,022 --> 00:18:33,155
YOU CAN'’T JUST MAKE
A PROCLAMATION.
439
00:18:33,155 --> 00:18:34,678
YOU STILL NEED
SOMEWHERE TO STAY.
440
00:18:34,678 --> 00:18:35,810
- I'’LL STAY AT LISSA'’S.
441
00:18:35,810 --> 00:18:37,681
- SORRY, ALMOST OUT OF HERE,
442
00:18:37,681 --> 00:18:39,074
BUT I NEED CLARITY--
443
00:18:39,074 --> 00:18:41,598
DO YOU WANT ME TO KEEP
YOUR LUNCH OR YOUR MEDS?
444
00:18:41,598 --> 00:18:43,774
- BOTH.
445
00:18:43,774 --> 00:18:45,863
- YOU HAVE TO HAVE
A GUARDIAN OVER 18,
446
00:18:45,863 --> 00:18:47,778
AND YOU CAN'’T JUST HAVE
ANY GUARDIAN.
447
00:18:47,778 --> 00:18:48,779
I MEAN, IF WE'’RE GONNA
DO THIS RIGHT,
448
00:18:48,779 --> 00:18:51,130
YOU'’LL NEED
SOMEONE SUPERFICIAL,
449
00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:55,395
BRUTALLY HONEST, BITCHY,
WEALTHY, FEARLESS--
450
00:18:55,395 --> 00:18:57,484
- WAIT A SECOND.
THAT'’S ME.
451
00:18:57,484 --> 00:19:00,704
THAT'’S EXACTLY HOW I DESCRIBE
MYSELF ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE.
452
00:19:00,704 --> 00:19:03,620
- DO YOU WANT HER?
453
00:19:03,620 --> 00:19:05,492
- OH, I DON'’T KNOW.
454
00:19:08,799 --> 00:19:11,846
MAYBE.
455
00:19:11,846 --> 00:19:13,804
YES!
[laughs]
456
00:19:13,804 --> 00:19:15,066
YOU SEE, I'’VE BEEN TRYING
TO HAVE A BABY...
457
00:19:15,066 --> 00:19:16,329
- OH.
- GOD, NO.
458
00:19:16,329 --> 00:19:18,287
- BUT BABIES ARE
A LOT OF WORK,
459
00:19:18,287 --> 00:19:21,638
AND SADIE CAN
WIPE HER OWN ASS.
460
00:19:21,638 --> 00:19:25,555
- GOING ONCE, GOING TWICE...
461
00:19:25,555 --> 00:19:27,340
SOLD!
SADIE IS YOUR NEW BABY.
462
00:19:31,431 --> 00:19:33,607
- WELL, THIS SEEMS LIKE
A FINE IDEA.
463
00:19:33,607 --> 00:19:35,652
CALL ME WHEN YOU GET SETTLED.
464
00:19:35,652 --> 00:19:37,393
- I'’M SETTLED.
465
00:19:37,393 --> 00:19:40,831
- WELL, THEN, UM--
[chuckles]
466
00:19:40,831 --> 00:19:43,486
YOU LET ME KNOW
WHAT YOU NEED.
467
00:19:43,486 --> 00:19:45,967
- I TRIED.
468
00:19:45,967 --> 00:19:48,230
- WHAT?
469
00:19:48,230 --> 00:19:50,972
- NOTHING.
470
00:19:50,972 --> 00:19:54,018
- ♪ NEVER WEAR IT OUT
471
00:19:54,018 --> 00:19:56,499
♪ NEVER SHAKE IT OFF
472
00:19:56,499 --> 00:19:58,545
- IF I THOUGHT
ALMOST BEING ARRESTED
473
00:19:58,545 --> 00:20:01,374
WAS THE LOWLIGHT OF MY WEEK,
I WAS WRONG,
474
00:20:01,374 --> 00:20:04,507
BECAUSE MY REALITY FELT
LIKE SOLITARY CONFINEMENT.
475
00:20:04,507 --> 00:20:06,901
AND THE ONLY WAY
TO BREAK OUT OF MY PRISON
476
00:20:06,901 --> 00:20:09,643
WAS TO DO THE ONE THING
I DIDN'’T WANT TO DO--
477
00:20:09,643 --> 00:20:14,300
- HEAD'’S UP.
- APOLOGIZE.
478
00:20:14,300 --> 00:20:17,825
UNFORTUNATELY, THEY WEREN'’T
EXACTLY AIDING OR ABETTING.
479
00:20:21,394 --> 00:20:23,657
HEY, LET'’S JUST
GET OUT OF HERE.
480
00:20:23,657 --> 00:20:26,355
- ARE YOU SURE?
- YES.
481
00:20:26,355 --> 00:20:28,836
I JUST NEED
TO TAKE THE EDGE OFF.
482
00:20:28,836 --> 00:20:32,361
- ♪ IN THE DARKNESS
483
00:20:32,361 --> 00:20:36,931
♪ MAYBE I WON'’T EVEN
GO TO WORK THAT DAY ♪
484
00:20:36,931 --> 00:20:41,414
♪ I DON'’T CARE
IF I'’M IN TROUBLE AT ALL ♪
485
00:20:46,375 --> 00:20:47,898
- NEXT, ON AWKWARD...
- I TRIED TO STAY OUT OF IT,
486
00:20:47,898 --> 00:20:48,986
BUT I CAN'’T JUST SIT BACK
AND WATCH JENNA DRIFT
487
00:20:48,986 --> 00:20:50,553
INTO AMANDA BYNES-VILLE.
488
00:20:50,553 --> 00:20:51,598
- SO WHAT ARE
WE GONNA DO?
489
00:20:51,598 --> 00:20:53,556
- MY AFTERSCHOOL SPECIAL
VIDEO.
490
00:20:53,556 --> 00:20:58,082
- AN UBER-TRAGIC TALE ABOUT
A LOSER GIRL WHO WANTS TO DIE,
491
00:20:58,082 --> 00:21:01,695
CALLED WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO
ABOUT JENNY?
492
00:21:01,695 --> 00:21:03,436
- YOU'’VE GOT TO BE
[bleep] KIDDING ME.
36379
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