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1
00:00:02,611 --> 00:00:03,829
- PREVIOUSLY ON AWKWARD...
2
00:00:03,829 --> 00:00:05,396
- I'’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH
FOR MATTY.
3
00:00:05,396 --> 00:00:07,094
HE'’S HOT, AND I'’M NOT.
WHAT DO YOU SEE IN ME?
4
00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:09,444
BLESS ME, FATHER,
FOR I HAVE SINNED.
5
00:00:09,444 --> 00:00:10,662
I WAS THE GIRL WHO TRIED
TO KILL HERSELF.
6
00:00:10,662 --> 00:00:12,664
IT WAS WEIRD.
7
00:00:12,664 --> 00:00:15,145
MY SUICIDE STORY, WHICH MADE ME
A FREAK IN MY HIGH SCHOOL,
8
00:00:15,145 --> 00:00:16,233
MADE ME A HERO IN THEIRS.
9
00:00:20,585 --> 00:00:21,282
[Leah Lou & The 2 Left Shoes'’
Come Over]
10
00:00:21,282 --> 00:00:22,979
- ♪ I'’M A MESS AT BEST ♪
11
00:00:22,979 --> 00:00:25,286
- ONCE AGAIN, HOMECOMING PINNING
WAS IN PROCESS.
12
00:00:25,286 --> 00:00:27,766
- YES! YES!
[squeals]
13
00:00:27,766 --> 00:00:29,551
- IT WAS AN ANCIENT
PALOS HILLS TRADITION
14
00:00:29,551 --> 00:00:32,423
THAT WAS OTHERWISE KNOWN
AS BLOODY THURSDAY
15
00:00:32,423 --> 00:00:34,208
BECAUSE, WHILE IT WAS AN HONOR
TO GET STUCK,
16
00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:35,731
NO ONE KNEW THEIR WAY
AROUND A PIN.
17
00:00:35,731 --> 00:00:36,775
- [gasps]
18
00:00:36,775 --> 00:00:38,864
- ♪ YOU
19
00:00:38,864 --> 00:00:40,040
♪ COME OVER
20
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:40,997
- IS IT WEIRD
THAT I'’M WORRIED
21
00:00:40,997 --> 00:00:42,607
I MIGHT NOT GET ONE?
22
00:00:42,607 --> 00:00:44,740
- GIRLFRIEND, LOOSEN UP
YOUR POODLE SKIRT.
23
00:00:44,740 --> 00:00:46,568
MATTY IS NOT GONNA LEAVE
YOU LACKING.
24
00:00:46,568 --> 00:00:47,873
- AS OUTDATED
AS THE TRADITION WAS,
25
00:00:47,873 --> 00:00:49,745
THERE WAS SOMETHING
ABOUT BEING OUTED
26
00:00:49,745 --> 00:00:51,834
BY YOUR DATE THAT WAS...
27
00:00:51,834 --> 00:00:54,967
- IS JENNA HAMILTON HERE?
- SWEET.
28
00:00:54,967 --> 00:00:57,100
BUT IN MY EXCITEMENT
TO BE A HAVE,
29
00:00:57,100 --> 00:00:59,885
I'’D FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE GIRLS
WHO WERE STILL HAVE-NOTS,
30
00:00:59,885 --> 00:01:02,236
LIKE KIKI REYNOLDS
AND MIA BRADY
31
00:01:02,236 --> 00:01:04,586
AND KRISTY PATTON.
32
00:01:04,586 --> 00:01:07,545
I KNEW WHAT IT WAS LIKE
TO BE BARE-CHESTED.
33
00:01:07,545 --> 00:01:11,027
- JENNA HAMILTON,
WILL YOU BE...
34
00:01:11,027 --> 00:01:11,767
- [laughs]
MATTY'’S GIRL?
35
00:01:11,767 --> 00:01:14,248
YES, I WILL.
36
00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:15,684
- I'’M NOT SO SOLD ON THE SAFETY
OF THIS PIN.
37
00:01:15,684 --> 00:01:17,512
- I CAN SHOW YOU
HOW TO STICK IT.
38
00:01:17,512 --> 00:01:18,252
- OR I CAN SHOW YOU
WHERE TO STICK IT.
39
00:01:18,252 --> 00:01:22,691
LATER.
40
00:01:22,691 --> 00:01:24,258
BYE.
41
00:01:24,258 --> 00:01:25,563
- MAYBE MY PIN DIDN'’T NEED
TO BE A TICKET
42
00:01:25,563 --> 00:01:26,695
FOR THE GUILT TRAIN.
43
00:01:26,695 --> 00:01:27,826
MAYBE IT COULD JUST
REMIND ME
44
00:01:27,826 --> 00:01:29,654
THAT I WAS LUCKY
I HAD A BOYFRIEND.
45
00:01:29,654 --> 00:01:31,395
BESIDES, IT WASN'’T LIKE
I WAS GONNA RUB IT
46
00:01:31,395 --> 00:01:32,483
IN ANYONE'’S FACE.
47
00:01:32,483 --> 00:01:34,964
[all gasp]
OH.
48
00:01:34,964 --> 00:01:37,009
SORRY.
49
00:01:37,009 --> 00:01:38,576
OR MAYBE I WAS.
50
00:01:38,576 --> 00:01:40,100
[keyboard clicking]
51
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,363
[boom]
52
00:01:42,363 --> 00:01:44,104
- ABOUT TIME WE ALL GET
TO CLICK "LIKE"
53
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:45,322
ON THIS BIZARRO RITUAL.
54
00:01:45,322 --> 00:01:46,758
ALTHOUGH I FORGOT TO WEAR
A [bleep] SHIRT.
55
00:01:46,758 --> 00:01:48,586
- I DIDN'’T.
56
00:01:48,586 --> 00:01:50,893
AS EXPECTED, MY BEARD WAS A PRO
AT THE PIN STICK.
57
00:01:50,893 --> 00:01:52,895
A LITTLE BLOOD COULD'’VE GONE
A LONG WAY TO JAZZ MINE UP.
58
00:01:52,895 --> 00:01:54,331
- AT LEAST YOU GOT A PIN.
59
00:01:54,331 --> 00:01:55,985
REMEMBER WHAT IT FELT LIKE
LAST YEAR?
60
00:01:55,985 --> 00:01:57,726
- OR THE YEAR BEFORE?
- THAT'’S WHAT I'’M SAYING.
61
00:01:57,726 --> 00:01:59,728
DON'’T YOU GUYS HAVE
ANY SURVIVOR'’S GUILT?
62
00:01:59,728 --> 00:02:02,644
IT JUST FEELS OBNOXIOUS
TO FLAUNT OUR GOOD FORTUNE.
63
00:02:02,644 --> 00:02:03,732
MAYBE WE SHOULD TAKE THEM OFF.
64
00:02:03,732 --> 00:02:06,038
- OH, POP A CHILLAX-ATIVE,
JENNA.
65
00:02:06,038 --> 00:02:08,737
THESE PINS ARE NOT GONNA MAKE
ANY GIRL'’S SPIRAL GO VIRAL.
66
00:02:08,737 --> 00:02:11,566
- WHAT'’S THE POINT
OF ALL THIS, ANYWAY?
67
00:02:11,566 --> 00:02:12,697
WE'’RE JUST GONNA SPEND HOURS
GETTING READY,
68
00:02:12,697 --> 00:02:14,569
ONLY TO SWEAT
THROUGH OUR DRESSES,
69
00:02:14,569 --> 00:02:15,918
SITTING ON OUR BOYFRIEND'’S LAP.
70
00:02:15,918 --> 00:02:17,659
- SHE IS A TRUTH-TALKER.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
71
00:02:17,659 --> 00:02:22,316
- MATTY.
HE DOESN'’T EVEN DANCE.
72
00:02:22,316 --> 00:02:24,666
- BIG UPS ON THE LOVE MARKS,
LADIES.
73
00:02:24,666 --> 00:02:27,147
WAY TO BE DATABLE.
74
00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:31,716
MISS PATTON,
CAN YOU FOLLOW ME?
75
00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:33,718
- KRISTY PATTON,
PRIME EXAMPLE.
76
00:02:33,718 --> 00:02:34,980
WE WERE B.F.F.s
IN THE FOURTH GRADE,
77
00:02:34,980 --> 00:02:36,068
AND YES, I STOPPED
BEING FRIENDS WITH HER
78
00:02:36,068 --> 00:02:37,505
WHEN SHE STARTED
EATING CHALK,
79
00:02:37,505 --> 00:02:38,854
BUT I COULD JUST
AS EASILY BE HER,
80
00:02:38,854 --> 00:02:40,725
HAVING A NO-DATE MELTDOWN
TODAY.
81
00:02:40,725 --> 00:02:42,466
- UGH, MING,
I CAN'’T HANDLE JENNA
82
00:02:42,466 --> 00:02:43,598
WHEN SHE'’S DOWN
WITH A FROWN.
83
00:02:43,598 --> 00:02:46,209
HOW ABOUT A LITTLE BACKUP?
84
00:02:46,209 --> 00:02:49,517
- UH...
85
00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:51,214
- I'’M READY TO CALL IN
MY FAVOR.
86
00:02:51,214 --> 00:02:52,694
- FAVOR?
- DON'’T YOU REMEMBER
87
00:02:52,694 --> 00:02:54,870
WHEN I GOT YOU
THE SANCTUARY TAPE LAST YEAR,
88
00:02:54,870 --> 00:02:57,220
AND YOU SAID IF THERE WAS EVER
ANYTHING IN THE WORLD
89
00:02:57,220 --> 00:02:58,526
I NEEDED,
YOU'’D DO IT?
90
00:02:58,526 --> 00:02:59,918
- THAT'’S NOT EXACTLY
WHAT HAPPENED.
91
00:02:59,918 --> 00:03:01,137
- SINCE YOU'’RE
ON THE HOMECOMING COMMITTEE
92
00:03:01,137 --> 00:03:02,747
FOR THE EAST MEETS WEST CLUB--
93
00:03:02,747 --> 00:03:04,184
- ARE YOU CONFUSING ME
WITH ANOTHER ASIAN?
94
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:05,707
- YOU REPLACED
THE FORMER REP,
95
00:03:05,707 --> 00:03:08,318
THE ONE WHO
MYSTERIOUSLY DISAPPEARED.
96
00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:10,146
I THINK HIS NAME
WAS FRED WU.
97
00:03:10,146 --> 00:03:11,974
- FRED WHO?
- I DIDN'’T KNOW HIM EITHER.
98
00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:13,236
THE COMMITTEE'’S BEEN
99
00:03:13,236 --> 00:03:14,498
IN A DANCE THEME DEADLOCK
FOR WEEKS.
100
00:03:14,498 --> 00:03:16,283
THE EMERGENCY VOTE
IS THIS AFTERNOON.
101
00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:18,459
IT'’S DOWN TO GREAT BALL OF CHINA
AND TROPIC LIKE IT'’S HOT.
102
00:03:18,459 --> 00:03:22,985
- OH, SO YOU WANT ME
TO VOTE CHINA?
103
00:03:22,985 --> 00:03:24,769
- YOU SHOULDN'’T JUMP
TO CONCLUSIONS.
104
00:03:24,769 --> 00:03:27,555
YOU AREN'’T VERY GOOD AT IT.
105
00:03:27,555 --> 00:03:30,253
I NEED YOU TO MAKE
GREAT BALL LOSE.
106
00:03:30,253 --> 00:03:32,212
- I DON'’T UNDERSTAND.
107
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,648
- ALL YOU NEED
TO UNDERSTAND
108
00:03:33,648 --> 00:03:35,693
IS THAT THERE'’S NOTHING
TO UNDERSTAND.
109
00:03:35,693 --> 00:03:37,173
- SO DO I EVEN HAVE
A CHOICE?
110
00:03:37,173 --> 00:03:39,828
both: [giggling]
111
00:03:39,828 --> 00:03:41,786
- DON'’T BE SILLY.
OF COURSE YOU DO.
112
00:03:41,786 --> 00:03:45,181
- OH.
- [giggles]
113
00:03:45,181 --> 00:03:46,791
[speaking foreign language]
114
00:03:46,791 --> 00:03:49,272
- YOU WANT TO DOUBLE-CROSS
A DOUBLE-CROSSER?
115
00:03:49,272 --> 00:03:50,926
- I'’M WEIGHING MY OPTIONS.
116
00:03:50,926 --> 00:03:52,928
- OH, WELL, DROP YOUR OPTIONS
BACK ON THE SCALE
117
00:03:52,928 --> 00:03:54,451
BECAUSE THE ONLY WAY
THIS IS GONNA END
118
00:03:54,451 --> 00:03:55,887
IS WITH YOU
ON A SLOW BOAT TO CHINA.
119
00:03:55,887 --> 00:03:57,280
- THIS MIGHT BE MY CHANCE
TO GET BACK AT HER
120
00:03:57,280 --> 00:03:58,890
FOR ALL THE [bleep]
SHE'’S DONE TO ME.
121
00:03:58,890 --> 00:04:01,197
JENNA! THOUGHTS?
122
00:04:01,197 --> 00:04:03,678
- HAMILTON, REIN IN
THE OBSESSING STRESSING.
123
00:04:03,678 --> 00:04:05,027
KRISTY PATTON IS FINE.
124
00:04:05,027 --> 00:04:07,159
MAYBE MATTY USED TOXIC PAINT
ON HER PIN.
125
00:04:07,159 --> 00:04:08,117
HOW MANY FINGERS
AM I HOLDING UP?
126
00:04:08,117 --> 00:04:09,771
- TWO. AND A THUMB.
127
00:04:09,771 --> 00:04:12,730
- HEY.
128
00:04:12,730 --> 00:04:13,731
YOU DON'’T HAVE TO WEAR
THE PIN.
129
00:04:13,731 --> 00:04:15,080
- WHY WOULDN'’T I?
130
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,604
- I DON'’T KNOW.
IT'’S KIND OF OBNOXIOUS.
131
00:04:16,604 --> 00:04:18,301
BUT, TO MY CREDIT,
NOT AS OBNOXIOUS
132
00:04:18,301 --> 00:04:19,084
AS HILLARY MATTHEWS'’.
133
00:04:19,084 --> 00:04:20,085
[cow bells jingling]
134
00:04:20,085 --> 00:04:21,696
- OBNOXIOUS.
135
00:04:21,696 --> 00:04:23,350
THAT WAS MY WORD.
136
00:04:23,350 --> 00:04:25,265
BUT I HADN'’T SHARED IT
WITH MATTY, WHICH MEANT...
137
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,267
T, NEED A NAPKIN?
- I GOT ONE.
138
00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:28,529
- WILL YOU WALK WITH ME
TO GET ONE?
139
00:04:28,529 --> 00:04:29,791
- THERE'’S A WHOLE STACK
RIGHT HERE.
140
00:04:29,791 --> 00:04:30,922
- THOSE AREN'’T SUBSTANTIAL.
141
00:04:30,922 --> 00:04:33,577
I NEED A SUBSTANTIAL NAPKIN
142
00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:37,973
AND YOUR HELP
IN CARRYING IT.
143
00:04:37,973 --> 00:04:39,583
- WHAT'’S WITH
THE TWITCH-SITCH?
144
00:04:39,583 --> 00:04:41,368
"NAPKIN" ISN'’T ANY OF THE CODES
I KNOW.
145
00:04:41,368 --> 00:04:43,413
- WHAT ABOUT GIRL CODE?
DO YOU KNOW THAT ONE?
146
00:04:43,413 --> 00:04:45,459
WHY DID YOU TELL MATTY
WHAT I SAID ABOUT THE PIN?
147
00:04:45,459 --> 00:04:46,938
- I DIDN'’T TELL MATTY.
148
00:04:46,938 --> 00:04:49,854
I JUST MAYBE TOLD JAKE.
BUT JAKE AND I--
149
00:04:49,854 --> 00:04:51,073
- TELL EACH OTHER EVERYTHING.
I'’VE HEARD.
150
00:04:51,073 --> 00:04:54,119
BUT YOUR SHARING IS GETTING
BACK TO MY RELATIONSHIP.
151
00:04:54,119 --> 00:04:56,296
PLEASE STOP TALKING TO JAKE
ABOUT MATTY AND ME.
152
00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:57,514
- OKAY. FINE.
153
00:04:57,514 --> 00:04:58,994
EVEN IF JAKE WANTS TO TALK
154
00:04:58,994 --> 00:05:00,952
ABOUT YOU OR MATTY, I WON'’T.
- SOUNDS GOOD.
155
00:05:00,952 --> 00:05:02,084
- LIKE, EVEN IF I FIND OUT
MATTY WANTS TO BUY YOU
156
00:05:02,084 --> 00:05:04,347
A STUFFED ANIMAL
FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY,
157
00:05:04,347 --> 00:05:07,437
I'’LL JUST LET IT HAPPEN.
158
00:05:07,437 --> 00:05:10,179
- UH, I HAVE TO GO DO
A-A THING.
159
00:05:10,179 --> 00:05:11,441
- ♪ HE SAYS HE'’S READY ♪
160
00:05:11,441 --> 00:05:12,877
♪ THEN HE MAKES ME WAIT
161
00:05:12,877 --> 00:05:14,401
- IF KRISTY WAS ABOUT TO GET
TO SECOND BASE
162
00:05:14,401 --> 00:05:16,403
WITH A PIN,
THEN I'’D BE ABLE
163
00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:19,449
TO TUCK MY GUILT TO SLEEP.
164
00:05:19,449 --> 00:05:21,582
BUT THE ACTION
WAS ALL IN MY HEAD.
165
00:05:21,582 --> 00:05:22,931
KRISTY WASN'’T GETTING PINNED,
166
00:05:22,931 --> 00:05:26,326
WHICH WAS MAKING HER
TOO DEPRESSED TO EAT...
167
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:29,329
- ♪ WELL, THERE'’S NO PLACE
I'’D RATHER BE ♪
168
00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:32,506
- AND CAUSING HER TO OLD-SCHOOL
BLOG OUT HER FEELINGS...
169
00:05:32,506 --> 00:05:34,899
- ♪ THAN HERE WITH YOU
IN FRONT OF ME ♪
170
00:05:34,899 --> 00:05:38,599
- AND SHARE HER SOB STORY
WITH VAL.
171
00:05:38,599 --> 00:05:42,298
UNFORTUNATELY, MY GUILT TRIP
WASN'’T GOING ANYWHERE.
172
00:05:42,298 --> 00:05:44,692
WE NEED TO TALK
ABOUT KRISTY.
173
00:05:44,692 --> 00:05:47,259
- OH, IT IS SO SWEET OF YOU
TO TAKE AN INTEREST
174
00:05:47,259 --> 00:05:49,392
IN THE BOTTOM FEEDERS
OF THE SOCIAL AQUARIUM,
175
00:05:49,392 --> 00:05:51,002
BUT I CANNOT DISCUSS
OTHER STUDENTS'’ PROBLEMS.
176
00:05:51,002 --> 00:05:53,004
- I'’M JUST REALLY WORRIED
ABOUT HER.
177
00:05:53,004 --> 00:05:55,355
- MM, WELL,
178
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:58,358
MAYBE WE CAN DISCUSS...
179
00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:00,795
OUR MUTUAL FRIEND...
180
00:06:00,795 --> 00:06:03,275
STAPLER.
181
00:06:03,275 --> 00:06:05,756
STAPLER IS
IN A DARK PLACE, J.
182
00:06:05,756 --> 00:06:08,759
HE IS JUST CAREENING
DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE.
183
00:06:08,759 --> 00:06:11,327
AND IF YOU THINK LIFE
TOPSIDE IS TOUGH,
184
00:06:11,327 --> 00:06:12,546
IT IS WORSE DOWN BELOW.
185
00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:15,505
YOU KNOW,
STAPLER REMINDS ME A LOT
186
00:06:15,505 --> 00:06:17,855
OF WHO YOU COULD'’VE BEEN
HAD OUR PATHS NEVER CROSSED.
187
00:06:17,855 --> 00:06:19,161
- ARE YOU SUGGESTING
WE NEED TO START
188
00:06:19,161 --> 00:06:20,510
A KRISTY WATCH?
189
00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:21,729
- OH, I'’M WATCHING HER
VERY CLOSELY,
190
00:06:21,729 --> 00:06:23,078
AND I GAVE HER
MY BEST ADVICE.
191
00:06:23,078 --> 00:06:24,209
- WHICH WAS?
192
00:06:24,209 --> 00:06:26,124
- AVOID THE DANCE.
193
00:06:26,124 --> 00:06:27,561
[timer dings]
194
00:06:27,561 --> 00:06:28,692
UGH, I HATE TO KICK YOU OUT,
195
00:06:28,692 --> 00:06:30,259
BUT PIN DAY
IS MY BUSIEST DAY
196
00:06:30,259 --> 00:06:31,347
OF THE YEAR,
197
00:06:31,347 --> 00:06:32,348
JUST A BIG OL'’ TRAIL
OF TEARS
198
00:06:32,348 --> 00:06:34,306
TO AND FROM MY OFFICE.
199
00:06:34,306 --> 00:06:35,786
- VAL'’S ADVICE
TO AVOID THE DANCE
200
00:06:35,786 --> 00:06:38,398
WASN'’T REVOLUTIONARY,
201
00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:40,574
CONSIDERING KRISTY
DIDN'’T HAVE A DATE.
202
00:06:40,574 --> 00:06:42,880
BUT SHE HAD A POINT,
AND I SUDDENLY HAD A PLAN.
203
00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:44,578
I CAN'’T WEAR THE PIN.
204
00:06:44,578 --> 00:06:46,275
IT'’S NOT THAT I DON'’T LOVE
THAT YOU MADE IT FOR ME.
205
00:06:46,275 --> 00:06:48,799
I MEAN, I REALLY AM IMPRESSED
WITH YOUR CRAFTSMANSHIP.
206
00:06:48,799 --> 00:06:50,410
PIPE CLEANERS ARE TRICKY.
207
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,542
BUT I CAN'’T SUPPORT
A TRADITION
208
00:06:52,542 --> 00:06:55,327
THAT MAKES OTHER GIRLS
FEEL BAD ABOUT THEMSELVES.
209
00:06:55,327 --> 00:06:57,373
BECAUSE I DON'’T THINK ANYONE
SHOULD HAVE TO FEEL LESS THAN.
210
00:06:57,373 --> 00:07:00,158
- ♪ EVERY NOW AND THEN
211
00:07:00,158 --> 00:07:01,377
♪ I WOULD TRY TO START AGAIN
212
00:07:01,377 --> 00:07:02,987
- OKAY.
YOU DON'’T HAVE TO WEAR IT.
213
00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:04,380
- ♪ JUST ENOUGH TO PULL YOU
214
00:07:04,380 --> 00:07:06,382
- BUT WILL YOU STILL KEEP IT?
215
00:07:06,382 --> 00:07:08,602
- EVEN WITH THE PIN
OFF MY SHIRT,
216
00:07:08,602 --> 00:07:09,994
MY CHEST WAS STILL HEAVY.
217
00:07:09,994 --> 00:07:12,040
MAYBE IF I REALLY WANTED
TO STAND UP
218
00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:14,434
TO THIS TRADITION,
I NEEDED TO SIT IT OUT.
219
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:15,739
IT'’S NOT JUST THE PIN.
IT'’S THE DANCE.
220
00:07:15,739 --> 00:07:18,655
I CAN'’T GO.
I'’M SORRY.
221
00:07:23,399 --> 00:07:25,357
- SILENCIO, POR FAVOR.
222
00:07:25,357 --> 00:07:27,229
I HAVE JUST TALLIED
THE THIRD ROUND
223
00:07:27,229 --> 00:07:28,665
OF SILENT BALLOTS.
224
00:07:28,665 --> 00:07:30,493
- THIS ALL COULD'’VE BEEN DONE
WEEKS AGO
225
00:07:30,493 --> 00:07:32,539
IF I STILL HAD
UNIVERSAL POWER.
226
00:07:32,539 --> 00:07:34,149
- ON THAT NOTE,
THE BALLOTS SAY
227
00:07:34,149 --> 00:07:36,412
THAT CHEERLEADERS SHOULD RUN
CONCESSIONS THIS YEAR.
228
00:07:36,412 --> 00:07:37,631
I THINK YOU'’RE REALLY
GONNA ROCK
229
00:07:37,631 --> 00:07:39,197
THE APRON/HAIR NET COMBO.
230
00:07:39,197 --> 00:07:40,503
- WATCH IT WITH THE '’TUDE,
TWIGGY,
231
00:07:40,503 --> 00:07:42,592
OR I WILL BREAK YOU
IN HALF.
232
00:07:42,592 --> 00:07:44,072
- WITH YOUR GIANT MAN HANDS?
233
00:07:44,072 --> 00:07:46,204
[all gasp]
234
00:07:46,204 --> 00:07:49,556
WE HAVE A TIE BETWEEN...
235
00:07:49,556 --> 00:07:52,384
TROPIC LIKE IT'’S HOT AND...
236
00:07:52,384 --> 00:07:54,517
GREAT BALL OF CHINA.
237
00:07:54,517 --> 00:07:57,433
REPS FROM EACH CLUB,
PREPARE YOUR FINAL PITCHES.
238
00:08:02,177 --> 00:08:03,613
- HEY!
239
00:08:03,613 --> 00:08:06,007
SO.
240
00:08:06,007 --> 00:08:08,966
DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF
A MANIPULATIVE BITCH?
241
00:08:08,966 --> 00:08:11,229
RIGHT. OKAY.
242
00:08:11,229 --> 00:08:14,232
UM, AS A...
243
00:08:14,232 --> 00:08:16,017
MANIPULATIVE BITCH,
244
00:08:16,017 --> 00:08:17,148
IF YOU ASK SOMEONE
TO DO SOMETHING,
245
00:08:17,148 --> 00:08:18,672
DO YOU WANT THEM
TO DO IT?
246
00:08:18,672 --> 00:08:20,630
OR DO YOU ASK THEM
THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU WANT,
247
00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:22,414
KNOWING THEY KNOW
YOU'’RE A BITCH
248
00:08:22,414 --> 00:08:23,677
AND MIGHT NOT DO IT?
249
00:08:23,677 --> 00:08:25,287
- IF I TELL SOMEONE
TO DO SOMETHING,
250
00:08:25,287 --> 00:08:27,028
I WANT IT DONE,
251
00:08:27,028 --> 00:08:29,291
LIKE I WANT YOU TO TAKE
YOUR DUMB-ASS QUESTIONS
252
00:08:29,291 --> 00:08:31,598
AND YOUR ANDROGYNOUS WARDROBE
253
00:08:31,598 --> 00:08:34,992
AND GO AWAY.
254
00:08:34,992 --> 00:08:38,692
- OHH. SO BECCA DOES WANT
GREAT BALL TO LOSE.
255
00:08:38,692 --> 00:08:39,693
WHICH MEANS...
256
00:08:39,693 --> 00:08:43,218
1930s SHANGHAI.
257
00:08:43,218 --> 00:08:45,960
OPIUM SMOKE FILLS THE AIR.
258
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:50,530
PAPER LANTERNS DANCE
ACROSS A HARVEST MOON.
259
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,662
AND TINY TRIANGLES
260
00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:56,187
OF FOIL-WRAPPED CHICKEN.
261
00:08:56,187 --> 00:08:59,582
[Chinese string music]
262
00:09:02,150 --> 00:09:03,847
[cheers]
263
00:09:03,847 --> 00:09:06,981
BECCA CAN SUCK MY BIG FAT--
264
00:09:06,981 --> 00:09:08,330
- WOODY.
265
00:09:08,330 --> 00:09:11,376
WOODY LOVERIDGE
WOULD BE PERFECT FOR KRISTY.
266
00:09:11,376 --> 00:09:14,031
[soft rock music playing]
267
00:09:14,031 --> 00:09:16,251
- [squeals]
LET ME SEE YOUR PIN. AH!
268
00:09:16,251 --> 00:09:18,993
OOH, CRAFTY.
269
00:09:18,993 --> 00:09:20,429
WHY AREN'’T YOU WEARING IT?
I WANT TO SEE IT ON.
270
00:09:20,429 --> 00:09:21,691
- I'’M NOT PUTTING IT ON,
271
00:09:21,691 --> 00:09:23,432
AND I'’M NOT GOING
TO THE DANCE.
272
00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:25,173
- DID YOU BREAK UP?
- NO!
273
00:09:25,173 --> 00:09:27,392
- MATTY DOESN'’T WANT TO GO.
- NO. I DON'’T.
274
00:09:27,392 --> 00:09:29,177
I DON'’T WANT TO BE
A PART OF SOMETHING
275
00:09:29,177 --> 00:09:31,135
THAT MAKES GIRLS
WITHOUT DATES FEEL BAD.
276
00:09:31,135 --> 00:09:33,181
- BUT THAT'’S PART OF WHAT'’S
SO GREAT ABOUT HAVING A DATE.
277
00:09:33,181 --> 00:09:34,574
- NO, YOU DON'’T GET IT.
278
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:35,792
I DON'’T WANT
TO SINGLE OUT THE SINGLES.
279
00:09:35,792 --> 00:09:37,185
I'’VE BEEN THERE,
AND IT SUCKS.
280
00:09:37,185 --> 00:09:38,752
- BUT YOU'’RE NOT THERE ANYMORE.
- I KNOW.
281
00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:40,449
AND SOMEONE NEEDS
TO TAKE A STAND
282
00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:41,537
BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE HURTING.
283
00:09:41,537 --> 00:09:43,017
- DOES MATTY WANT TO GO?
284
00:09:43,017 --> 00:09:45,323
- YES.
- SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT.
285
00:09:45,323 --> 00:09:47,064
YOU'’RE HURTING SOMEONE
YOU LOVE
286
00:09:47,064 --> 00:09:49,240
TO AVOID HURTING PEOPLE
YOU BARELY KNOW,
287
00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:51,852
WHO, BY THE WAY,
WILL BE SITTING AT HOME
288
00:09:51,852 --> 00:09:54,202
AND WILL NEVER KNOW YOU WENT
TO THE DANCE ANYWAY.
289
00:09:54,202 --> 00:09:55,290
WHO WINS HERE?
290
00:09:55,290 --> 00:09:57,466
- ME, BECAUSE I'’M TAKING
A STAND.
291
00:09:57,466 --> 00:09:59,207
- WELL, IT'’S A DUMB STAND.
- WELL, YOU'’RE A DUMB MOM.
292
00:09:59,207 --> 00:10:01,775
- AND YOU ARE
A CRAZY TEENAGER,
293
00:10:01,775 --> 00:10:03,385
AND A SELFISH ONE AT THAT,
294
00:10:03,385 --> 00:10:05,517
BECAUSE PROTESTING THE DANCE
DOESN'’T HELP ANYONE,
295
00:10:05,517 --> 00:10:06,388
AND IT HURTS MATTY.
296
00:10:06,388 --> 00:10:10,392
IT IS HIS NIGHT TOO.
297
00:10:10,392 --> 00:10:11,959
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
- CALLING MATTY.
298
00:10:11,959 --> 00:10:13,134
YOU'’RE GOING.
299
00:10:13,134 --> 00:10:14,439
TALK.
300
00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:16,616
[line rings]
301
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,227
- HEY.
- HEY.
302
00:10:19,227 --> 00:10:21,925
SORRY YOU HAD FRONT ROW SEATS
TO THE FREAK SHOW EARLIER.
303
00:10:21,925 --> 00:10:24,624
DO YOU WANT TO GO
TO THE DANCE?
304
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:27,148
- DO YOU WANT TO GO?
- IF YOU WANT TO GO.
305
00:10:27,148 --> 00:10:28,584
- I THINK IT MIGHT BE FUN,
BUT I DON'’T WANT TO MAKE YOU GO.
306
00:10:28,584 --> 00:10:30,281
- I DON'’T WANT
TO MAKE YOU NOT GO.
307
00:10:30,281 --> 00:10:33,502
- THEN LET'’S GO.
- GREAT, CAN'’T WAIT.
308
00:10:35,852 --> 00:10:38,812
- HMM.
309
00:10:38,812 --> 00:10:41,162
HOMECOMING'’S BACK ON.
310
00:10:41,162 --> 00:10:42,685
BUT I AM CONFUSED.
311
00:10:42,685 --> 00:10:44,992
SHE DIDN'’T WANT TO GO.
NOW SHE WANTS TO GO.
312
00:10:44,992 --> 00:10:46,515
DO YOU KNOW WHAT'’S UP?
313
00:10:46,515 --> 00:10:47,516
- I KNOW NOTHING.
314
00:10:47,516 --> 00:10:49,300
- MM, YOU KNOW SOMETHING.
315
00:10:49,300 --> 00:10:50,475
- NO, I DON'’T.
- WHAT DO YOU KNOW?
316
00:10:50,475 --> 00:10:53,740
- NOTHING.
317
00:10:53,740 --> 00:10:55,698
NO.
318
00:10:55,698 --> 00:10:57,178
guys: ♪ DO-DO DO-DO
- NO! NO!
319
00:10:57,178 --> 00:10:59,136
NO NO NO!
STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP!
320
00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:01,051
JENNA'’S UPSET
MATTY DOESN'’T DANCE!
321
00:11:01,051 --> 00:11:03,010
I AM SO DEAD.
322
00:11:03,010 --> 00:11:05,012
- SO IT WAS ABOUT ME.
323
00:11:05,012 --> 00:11:06,361
- YOU SHOULD GO.
324
00:11:06,361 --> 00:11:08,624
- UH! YOU ARE JUST GONNA TICKLE
AND TOSS ME?
325
00:11:08,624 --> 00:11:12,976
- I'’M SORRY.
I GOTTA CALL BRO CODE.
326
00:11:12,976 --> 00:11:15,022
OKAY.
327
00:11:15,022 --> 00:11:16,153
I'’M GONNA BREAK IT DOWN
FOR YOU.
328
00:11:16,153 --> 00:11:17,372
YOU GOTTA BREAK IT DOWN.
329
00:11:17,372 --> 00:11:18,678
- I CAN'’T.
330
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:19,504
- WELL, YOU HAVE TO.
331
00:11:19,504 --> 00:11:21,245
- I REALLY CANNOT DANCE.
332
00:11:21,245 --> 00:11:22,899
I'’M--I'’M BAD.
333
00:11:22,899 --> 00:11:25,641
- AND THAT...
IS WHY YOU HAVE ME.
334
00:11:25,641 --> 00:11:27,034
- NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
335
00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:28,296
WE'’RE NOT FOOTLOOSING.
336
00:11:28,296 --> 00:11:30,472
- HA, LIKE YOU'’RE READY
FOR A WAREHOUSE.
337
00:11:30,472 --> 00:11:31,386
- I DON'’T EVEN KNOW
WHAT THAT MEANS.
338
00:11:31,386 --> 00:11:33,780
- NEVER MIND.
339
00:11:33,780 --> 00:11:36,957
HELP ME MOVE THIS.
340
00:11:36,957 --> 00:11:39,960
[upbeat dance music]
341
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,049
♪
342
00:11:42,049 --> 00:11:44,704
- ♪ YOU NEVER SAW IT GOOD
343
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,401
- YOU'’RE GONNA GRAPEVINE,
AND GRAPEVINE,
344
00:11:46,401 --> 00:11:49,056
AND SPRINKLER, SPRINKLER,
SPRINKLER,
345
00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:51,319
TWIST, TWIST, TWIST,
OH, YEAH!
346
00:11:51,319 --> 00:11:53,538
LET ME SLOW IT DOWN
FOR YOU, OKAY?
347
00:11:53,538 --> 00:11:54,844
GRAPEVINE.
348
00:11:54,844 --> 00:11:56,716
GRAPEVINE.
349
00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:58,848
SPRINKLER.
SPRINKLER.
350
00:11:58,848 --> 00:12:00,110
- THESE ARE THE BASICS?
- YEAH.
351
00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:00,807
I'’M NOT EVEN GIVING YOU
AN EIGHT-COUNT.
352
00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:02,069
I'’M JUST FREESTYLING.
353
00:12:02,069 --> 00:12:03,070
- THERE IS NO WAY
I CAN DO THIS.
354
00:12:03,070 --> 00:12:04,288
- OKAY, OKAY,
355
00:12:04,288 --> 00:12:05,986
MAYBE I'’M GETTING
AHEAD OF MYSELF.
356
00:12:05,986 --> 00:12:07,030
LET ME LET YOU IN
ON A LITTLE SECRET,
357
00:12:07,030 --> 00:12:08,118
PASSED DOWN
THROUGH GENERATIONS
358
00:12:08,118 --> 00:12:09,729
OF ROSATI MEN:
359
00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:12,296
YOU JUST...GOTTA...GIVE...
360
00:12:12,296 --> 00:12:15,125
GOOD...FACE.
361
00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:16,431
WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT
RIGHT NOW?
362
00:12:16,431 --> 00:12:18,215
YOU'’RE LOOKIN'’ AT MY FACE.
363
00:12:18,215 --> 00:12:20,348
- YEAH.
- HA, HA, RIGHT?
364
00:12:20,348 --> 00:12:21,915
- YEAH!
- YEAH.
365
00:12:21,915 --> 00:12:24,352
- YEAH.
- HEY.
366
00:12:24,352 --> 00:12:25,657
ALL RIGHT.
367
00:12:25,657 --> 00:12:28,748
- HA!
- OH, YEAH.
368
00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,053
WE'’RE GONNA HAVE YOU MAKING
DANCE MAGIC IN NO TIME, MAN.
369
00:12:30,053 --> 00:12:31,794
- [exhales]
370
00:12:31,794 --> 00:12:32,795
- OH, YEAH!
371
00:12:32,795 --> 00:12:34,405
[energetic dance music]
372
00:12:34,405 --> 00:12:39,497
♪
373
00:12:39,497 --> 00:12:40,977
- WHAT TIME IS IT?
374
00:12:40,977 --> 00:12:42,587
I THOUGHT THEY WOULD BE HERE
BY NOW.
375
00:12:42,587 --> 00:12:45,329
WHY DID THEY WANT TO MEET US?
- MATTY WOULDN'’T SAY.
376
00:12:45,329 --> 00:12:47,767
♪
377
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,333
DID KRISTY PATTON
GET A DATE?
378
00:12:49,333 --> 00:12:50,987
- UNTIL YESTERDAY,
I HADN'’T EVEN HEARD OF HER,
379
00:12:50,987 --> 00:12:53,947
SO MY INTEL ON HER DATING LIFE
ISNADABOOM.
380
00:12:53,947 --> 00:12:55,383
- IF KRISTY WASN'’T
A SAD SINGLE,
381
00:12:55,383 --> 00:12:57,646
I COULD FLIP OFF
MY GUILT SWITCH AND FINALLY--
382
00:12:57,646 --> 00:12:59,735
- RELAX, DUDE.
383
00:12:59,735 --> 00:13:01,171
HEY, IT'’LL BE OVER
BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.
384
00:13:01,171 --> 00:13:03,434
[muffled dance music]
385
00:13:03,434 --> 00:13:05,741
LET'’S SEE THOSE FACES.
386
00:13:05,741 --> 00:13:07,134
COME ON.
GIVE IT TO ME.
387
00:13:07,134 --> 00:13:09,353
- UH.
OOH, OOH, OOH.
388
00:13:09,353 --> 00:13:12,530
HA.
389
00:13:12,530 --> 00:13:15,446
- YOU'’RE AS GOOD AS IT GETS.
390
00:13:15,446 --> 00:13:17,753
[upbeat dance music]
391
00:13:17,753 --> 00:13:19,886
[indistinct chatter]
392
00:13:19,886 --> 00:13:21,365
- MING.
393
00:13:21,365 --> 00:13:23,324
HONGHUI.
394
00:13:23,324 --> 00:13:25,282
- IS THAT YOUR REAL NAME?
395
00:13:25,282 --> 00:13:28,851
WHAT'’S UP
WITH THE WITHHOLDING?
396
00:13:28,851 --> 00:13:30,766
- SO, GREAT BALL OF CHINA WON.
397
00:13:30,766 --> 00:13:32,812
- YEAH, CRAZY, RIGHT?
398
00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:34,204
I TALKED
ABOUT FEET BINDING
399
00:13:34,204 --> 00:13:36,990
AND HOW HARD IT IS
TO EAT WITH CHOPSTICKS,
400
00:13:36,990 --> 00:13:41,690
AND PEOPLE STILL THOUGHT
IT SOUNDED LIKE A PARTY.
401
00:13:41,690 --> 00:13:43,692
- I KNOW WHAT YOU DID
IN THE MEETING.
402
00:13:43,692 --> 00:13:44,998
BUT DON'’T WORRY.
403
00:13:44,998 --> 00:13:46,347
I WANTED GREAT BALL
TO WIN.
404
00:13:46,347 --> 00:13:47,652
I GOT ALL THIS ASIAN CRAP
405
00:13:47,652 --> 00:13:49,089
FOR FIVE CENTS
ON THE DOLLAR.
406
00:13:49,089 --> 00:13:50,307
NOW WE HAVE THE REST
OF THE DANCE BUDGET
407
00:13:50,307 --> 00:13:52,266
TO PAY FOR OUR WINTER
SKI TRIP.
408
00:13:52,266 --> 00:13:53,484
- YOU GET TO KEEP
THE EXTRA MONEY?
409
00:13:53,484 --> 00:13:56,183
- WE HAVE
A VERY GOOD ACCOUNTANT.
410
00:13:56,183 --> 00:13:57,749
ENJOY THE DANCE.
411
00:13:57,749 --> 00:13:59,099
[gasps]
AND TRY THE DIM SUM.
412
00:13:59,099 --> 00:14:02,363
THE SOY SAUCE HAS
AN EXTRA KICK.
413
00:14:02,363 --> 00:14:03,668
[speaking foreign language]
414
00:14:03,668 --> 00:14:05,279
[giggles]
415
00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:11,415
- YOUR ADVICE SUCKED.
- WHAT ADVICE?
416
00:14:11,415 --> 00:14:14,027
- AT THE HOMECOMING HEARING.
YOU SCREWED ME.
417
00:14:14,027 --> 00:14:16,377
- I DON'’T CARE ENOUGH ABOUT YOU
TO SCREW YOU.
418
00:14:16,377 --> 00:14:18,248
- WHERE DID I GO WRONG?
419
00:14:18,248 --> 00:14:20,381
- [gasps]
SORRY, SLIM SADIE.
420
00:14:20,381 --> 00:14:23,079
COULD BARELY EVEN SEE
YOU THERE.
421
00:14:23,079 --> 00:14:24,689
[chuckles]
KIDDING!
422
00:14:24,689 --> 00:14:26,169
WHO COULDN'’T SEE YOU?
423
00:14:26,169 --> 00:14:27,649
- BUMP ME AGAIN,
AND I WILL SHOVE
424
00:14:27,649 --> 00:14:29,564
ONE OF THESE STUPID
ASIAN DUMPLINGS
425
00:14:29,564 --> 00:14:30,870
SO FAR UP YOUR ASS,
426
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:34,612
YOU'’LL START SPEAKING
BROKEN ENGLISH.
427
00:14:34,612 --> 00:14:36,745
- [giggling]
428
00:14:36,745 --> 00:14:39,400
- [exhales]
429
00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:42,446
- I ASKED A WHITE BITCH
FOR ASIAN BITCH ADVICE.
430
00:14:42,446 --> 00:14:44,492
[bleep] ME.
431
00:14:44,492 --> 00:14:45,536
- HEY.
- HEY.
432
00:14:45,536 --> 00:14:47,451
- WHAT TOOK YOU GUYS
SO LONG?
433
00:14:47,451 --> 00:14:50,106
- JAKE HAD BAD TACOS.
- MATTY HAD BAD TACOS.
434
00:14:50,106 --> 00:14:51,673
- WHATEVER.
435
00:14:51,673 --> 00:14:54,154
YOU CAN KEEP YOUR BROMO-EROTIC
SECRETS TO YOURSELF.
436
00:14:54,154 --> 00:14:56,156
BUT, JAKE, CAN WE GO
HIP-LOCK ALREADY?
437
00:14:56,156 --> 00:15:00,073
- OOH.
TALK DIRTY TO ME, BABY.
438
00:15:00,073 --> 00:15:01,422
- WHILE THEY WENT TO GRIND,
439
00:15:01,422 --> 00:15:03,641
I WOULD BE LAP-LOCKED
IN THREE, TWO--
440
00:15:03,641 --> 00:15:05,469
- ONE SEC, JAKE.
441
00:15:05,469 --> 00:15:08,342
[romantic hip-hop music]
442
00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:10,779
- UGH, I WISH OUR BOYFRIENDS
WOULD BREAK UP.
443
00:15:10,779 --> 00:15:12,868
- I CAN'’T DANCE TO THIS SONG.
IT'’S TOO SLOW.
444
00:15:12,868 --> 00:15:14,565
I WON'’T BE ABLE TO DISTRACT
PEOPLE WITH MY FACE.
445
00:15:14,565 --> 00:15:16,219
- OKAY.
446
00:15:16,219 --> 00:15:17,917
I HEARD THERE'’S A SECRET MENU
AT THE DIM SUM CART
447
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,440
WHERE IF YOU ASK
FOR "PLUM SURPRISE",
448
00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,616
YOU GET SOY SAUCE PACKETS
FULL OF LIQUOR.
449
00:15:21,616 --> 00:15:23,009
WHY DON'’T WE GET A COUPLE
OF THOSE, CALM YOU DOWN?
450
00:15:23,009 --> 00:15:24,010
- YEAH, THAT SOUNDS GOOD.
451
00:15:24,010 --> 00:15:26,926
- HEY, WE'’LL BE RIGHT BACK.
452
00:15:29,450 --> 00:15:31,365
- THE DOUBLE-CROSSER
DOUBLE-CROSSED ME,
453
00:15:31,365 --> 00:15:33,193
BUT I WILL TAKE HER DOWN.
454
00:15:33,193 --> 00:15:34,542
- HATE TO BLOW OUT
YOUR HATE-SCHEME PIPE DREAM,
455
00:15:34,542 --> 00:15:36,587
BUT BECCA'’S ALWAYS
THREE STEPS AHEAD.
456
00:15:36,587 --> 00:15:38,894
ACTUALLY, SHE HAS TINY FEET.
MAKE THAT FIVE.
457
00:15:38,894 --> 00:15:39,895
- T'’S RIGHT.
458
00:15:39,895 --> 00:15:40,940
SHE PROBABLY ALREADY KNOWS
459
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,158
YOU'’RE TRYING TO RETALIATE.
460
00:15:42,158 --> 00:15:44,160
- NO, SHE THINKS
I'’M SCARED AGAIN.
461
00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:46,641
THERE'’S NO WAY SHE KNOWS
I'’M LONG-HAULING MY REVENGE.
462
00:15:46,641 --> 00:15:48,251
[cell phone blips]
463
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:55,128
- HOLY [bleep].
464
00:15:55,128 --> 00:15:56,738
- [chuckles weakly]
HENRY.
465
00:15:56,738 --> 00:15:59,697
WE GOTTA GO.
[laughs]
466
00:15:59,697 --> 00:16:03,614
DO YOUR PARENTS HAVE
A FALLOUT SHELTER?
467
00:16:03,614 --> 00:16:05,355
- YOU WOULD NEVER COME
TO THE DANCE ALONE, WOULD YOU?
468
00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:06,356
- LET'’S REWIND
TO AN HOUR AGO,
469
00:16:06,356 --> 00:16:07,792
WHEN WE DROVE
OURSELVES HERE.
470
00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:09,142
- BUT WE HAD DATES,
AND WHEN WE DIDN'’T,
471
00:16:09,142 --> 00:16:10,795
WE WERE NO-SHOWS.
472
00:16:10,795 --> 00:16:12,449
- LOOP ME IN ON YOUR SPIRAL.
473
00:16:12,449 --> 00:16:14,103
- I HAVEN'’T ACTUALLY SEEN KRISTY
WITH A GUY ALL NIGHT.
474
00:16:14,103 --> 00:16:17,411
- AGAIN WITH THE PATTON PATROL?
475
00:16:17,411 --> 00:16:20,631
- I'’M GONNA GO DO
A DRIVE-BY.
476
00:16:20,631 --> 00:16:22,546
- THERE IS NO LIQUOR
ON THIS CART.
477
00:16:22,546 --> 00:16:23,895
- WHO WOULD MAKE UP
PLUM SURPRISE?
478
00:16:23,895 --> 00:16:26,942
[upbeat dance music]
- NEW SONG.
479
00:16:26,942 --> 00:16:28,204
I THINK I CAN DANCE TO IT.
480
00:16:28,204 --> 00:16:29,771
- HA. YOU'’RE GONNA DANCE.
- LOOK.
481
00:16:29,771 --> 00:16:31,425
JENNA HAS THE SAME IDEA.
482
00:16:31,425 --> 00:16:33,383
JUST REMEMBER,
YOU'’RE NOT GONNA BE ALONE.
483
00:16:33,383 --> 00:16:34,950
YOU CAN DO THIS.
484
00:16:34,950 --> 00:16:39,650
- ♪ I DON'’T KNOW
WHAT YOU'’RE WAITING FOR ♪
485
00:16:39,650 --> 00:16:41,217
♪ I WANNA SEE YOU PLAY
486
00:16:41,217 --> 00:16:42,784
♪ COME ON AND MAKE MY DAY
487
00:16:42,784 --> 00:16:45,047
- I [bleep] LOVE ASIANS.
488
00:16:45,047 --> 00:16:46,570
- I WAS RIGHT.
489
00:16:46,570 --> 00:16:48,181
KRISTY DIDN'’T HAVE A DATE.
490
00:16:48,181 --> 00:16:49,356
SHE WASN'’T HAVING FUN.
491
00:16:49,356 --> 00:16:50,400
HER NIGHT WAS...
492
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:52,141
ABOUT TO GET AWESOME.
493
00:16:52,141 --> 00:16:54,622
BRYAN JOHNSON WAS GONNA ASK
HER TO DANCE.
494
00:16:54,622 --> 00:16:55,666
THEY'’D BUMP, GRIND,
FALL IN LOVE,
495
00:16:55,666 --> 00:16:57,233
AND LIVE HAPPILY...
496
00:16:57,233 --> 00:16:59,801
NEVER AFTER.
497
00:16:59,801 --> 00:17:01,846
I WAS STILL LIVING IN THE HOUSE
THAT GUILT BUILT,
498
00:17:01,846 --> 00:17:04,371
AND THERE WAS ONLY ONE WAY
TO TEAR IT DOWN.
499
00:17:04,371 --> 00:17:07,069
♪
500
00:17:07,069 --> 00:17:08,244
- OH.
501
00:17:12,553 --> 00:17:13,771
- ♪ MIC CHECK,
ONE TWO, ONE TWO ♪
502
00:17:13,771 --> 00:17:15,904
- HEY, I'’LL FIND HER.
KEEP MOVING.
503
00:17:15,904 --> 00:17:17,427
EYES ON THE PRIZE,
OUT OF YOUR HEAD.
504
00:17:17,427 --> 00:17:18,776
- EYES ON THE PRIZE.
505
00:17:18,776 --> 00:17:20,648
- ♪ I GOTTA GET
THIS PARTY STARTED ♪
506
00:17:20,648 --> 00:17:21,997
♪ I GOTTA GET
THIS PARTY CRACKIN'’ ♪
507
00:17:21,997 --> 00:17:23,520
♪ I GOTTA BRING THAT BACK
TO THE CLUB ♪
508
00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:25,957
♪ ALL RIGHT,
NOW WATCH ME MAKE IT HAPPEN ♪
509
00:17:25,957 --> 00:17:27,437
- WHERE'’S JENNA?
I NEED YOU TO GET HER.
510
00:17:27,437 --> 00:17:29,004
- WHY?
- I CAN'’T SAY. BRO CODE.
511
00:17:29,004 --> 00:17:31,267
- BRO CODE CAN SUCK IT.
512
00:17:31,267 --> 00:17:32,529
I'’M NOT GONNA HELP YOU UNLESS
YOU TELL ME WHAT'’S GOING ON.
513
00:17:32,529 --> 00:17:34,096
- OKAY, FINE.
514
00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:37,099
MATTY'’S GONNA DANCE.
515
00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:41,364
[muffled dance music]
516
00:17:41,364 --> 00:17:42,452
- I JUST WANT TO SAY
517
00:17:42,452 --> 00:17:44,498
THESE DANCES ARE LAME.
518
00:17:44,498 --> 00:17:46,674
- OKAY.
- I'’VE BEEN WHERE YOU ARE.
519
00:17:46,674 --> 00:17:48,676
AND I KNOW THAT
THESE DUMB SCHOOL TRADITIONS
520
00:17:48,676 --> 00:17:51,635
CAN MAKE IT REALLY EASY
FOR YOU TO FEEL UNLOVABLE.
521
00:17:51,635 --> 00:17:54,725
NOT THAT YOU ARE.
THAT'’S NOT WHAT I MEANT.
522
00:17:54,725 --> 00:17:57,119
BUT I KNOW THAT YOU'’RE GOING
INTO THE BATHROOM
523
00:17:57,119 --> 00:17:58,207
TO CRY RIGHT NOW.
524
00:17:58,207 --> 00:18:00,688
AND I WANT TO SAY,
525
00:18:00,688 --> 00:18:01,863
IT GETS BETTER, KRISTY.
526
00:18:01,863 --> 00:18:03,343
- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
527
00:18:03,343 --> 00:18:04,909
- YOU DON'’T HAVE TO PRETEND.
528
00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:06,259
I KNOW YOU'’VE BEEN
TOO DEPRESSED TO EAT.
529
00:18:06,259 --> 00:18:07,869
I SAW YOU
THROW AWAY YOUR LUNCH.
530
00:18:07,869 --> 00:18:10,089
- YOU SAW THAT?
531
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:13,788
THAT WASN'’T MY LUNCH.
THAT WAS A DROP.
532
00:18:13,788 --> 00:18:17,008
[eerie music]
533
00:18:17,008 --> 00:18:19,315
- IT--
534
00:18:19,315 --> 00:18:20,838
BUT YOU WERE JOURNALING ABOUT
YOUR HEARTACHE ON THE QUAD.
535
00:18:20,838 --> 00:18:22,144
- I DON'’T HAVE A JOURNAL.
536
00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:24,668
[eerie music]
537
00:18:24,668 --> 00:18:27,018
- OKAY, WHAT ABOUT
IN VAL'’S OFFICE?
538
00:18:27,018 --> 00:18:29,282
YOUR EYES WERE BLOODSHOT.
539
00:18:29,282 --> 00:18:30,413
- I WAS HIGH-BALLS, JENNA.
540
00:18:30,413 --> 00:18:34,156
[eerie music]
541
00:18:34,156 --> 00:18:36,332
LISTEN, I APPRECIATE
YOUR CONCERN,
542
00:18:36,332 --> 00:18:37,725
BUT I'’M NOT HERE
FOR THE MEMORIES.
543
00:18:37,725 --> 00:18:39,509
I CAME TO MAKE
A TRANSACTION,
544
00:18:39,509 --> 00:18:42,251
AND HONESTLY, IT LOOKS LIKE
YOU COULD REALLY USE SOMETHING
545
00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:43,731
TO TAKE THE EDGE OFF.
546
00:18:43,731 --> 00:18:45,080
HERE.
547
00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:46,603
THE FIRST ONE'’S FREE.
548
00:18:46,603 --> 00:18:48,953
- PUT YOUR HANDS
WHERE I CAN SEE THEM.
549
00:18:48,953 --> 00:18:50,477
- YOU'’RE A COP, DYLAN?
550
00:18:50,477 --> 00:18:52,043
- IT'’S LEONARD,
AND I'’M D.E.A.
551
00:18:52,043 --> 00:18:54,263
YOU'’RE GOING DOWN.
552
00:18:54,263 --> 00:18:55,090
YOU'’RE FREE TO BOOGIE.
553
00:18:55,090 --> 00:18:57,048
- SUDDENLY, I WAS HIGH--
554
00:18:57,048 --> 00:18:58,224
WITHOUT THE DRUGS.
555
00:18:58,224 --> 00:19:00,139
KRISTY WASN'’T SAD
OR LONELY
556
00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:01,314
OR A HAVE-NOT,
557
00:19:01,314 --> 00:19:02,793
BECAUSE SHE WAS
ABOUT TO HAVE--
558
00:19:02,793 --> 00:19:04,099
A RECORD.
559
00:19:04,099 --> 00:19:05,448
- JENNA, COME. NOW.
560
00:19:05,448 --> 00:19:07,407
MATTY'’S GONNA DANCE.
561
00:19:11,802 --> 00:19:13,195
- ♪ BEFORE WE TOUCH
562
00:19:13,195 --> 00:19:14,501
- MORE FACES!
563
00:19:14,501 --> 00:19:15,676
- ♪ COME A LITTLE CLOSER
564
00:19:15,676 --> 00:19:18,940
- WOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!
565
00:19:18,940 --> 00:19:19,984
both: OH, MY GOD.
566
00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:21,638
- MATTY WAS DANCING,
567
00:19:21,638 --> 00:19:23,553
AND HE WASN'’T
THE ONLY ONE.
568
00:19:23,553 --> 00:19:25,816
APPARENTLY, I DIDN'’T HAVE
TO FEEL SORRY FOR ANYONE
569
00:19:25,816 --> 00:19:28,950
EXCEPT MYSELF, BECAUSE I WASN'’T
ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
570
00:19:28,950 --> 00:19:30,343
- I TOLD MATTY YOU WERE UPSET
HE DOESN'’T DANCE,
571
00:19:30,343 --> 00:19:32,519
BUT I DIDN'’T KNOW HE WAS GONNA
BE SUCH A SPAZ-HOLE.
572
00:19:32,519 --> 00:19:33,824
I'’M SORRY I BROKE GIRL CODE.
573
00:19:33,824 --> 00:19:36,175
- I'’M NOT.
574
00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:39,874
- ♪ I WON'’T TREAT YOU
LIKE YOU'’RE OH SO TYPICAL ♪
575
00:19:39,874 --> 00:19:43,182
♪
576
00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,096
♪ I WON'’T TREAT YOU
LIKE YOU'’RE OH SO TYPICAL ♪
577
00:19:45,096 --> 00:19:46,359
- I DON'’T WANT TO DO THIS.
578
00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:47,882
- COME ON, I DIDN'’T GET
TO SEE ALL OF IT
579
00:19:47,882 --> 00:19:49,318
'’CAUSE I COULDN'’T GET PAST
YOUR POSSE.
580
00:19:49,318 --> 00:19:51,102
- WHAT CAN I SAY?
THE LADIES LOVE MY MOVES.
581
00:19:51,102 --> 00:19:53,757
- SO LET'’S SEE SOME.
582
00:19:53,757 --> 00:19:55,933
- OKAY.
[clears throat]
583
00:19:55,933 --> 00:19:57,892
HIT IT.
584
00:19:57,892 --> 00:19:59,546
- ♪JUST ALL PHYSICAL ♪
585
00:19:59,546 --> 00:20:03,463
♪ I'’M THE TYPE WHO WON'’T GET
OH SO CRITICAL ♪
586
00:20:03,463 --> 00:20:07,641
♪ SO LET'’S MAKE
THINGS PHYSICAL ♪
587
00:20:07,641 --> 00:20:09,382
- COME ON, J-TOWN,
DON'’T LEAVE ME HANGING AGAIN!
588
00:20:09,382 --> 00:20:11,210
- [laughing]
589
00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:13,647
- ♪ I WANT YOU CLOSE,
I WANT YOU ♪
590
00:20:13,647 --> 00:20:17,433
♪ I WON'’T TREAT YOU
LIKE YOU'’RE TYPICAL ♪
591
00:20:17,433 --> 00:20:19,000
♪ I WANT YOU CLOSE
592
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,916
♪ I WANT YOU
593
00:20:26,268 --> 00:20:27,443
- NEXT ON AWKWARD...
I HAVE TO GO READ
594
00:20:27,443 --> 00:20:28,531
AT THE STUPID
COFFEE HOUSE TONIGHT.
595
00:20:28,531 --> 00:20:30,272
- SHE'’S GOT
A PERFORMANCE TONIGHT,
596
00:20:30,272 --> 00:20:31,621
WHICH SHE IS NOW
SHUTTING ME OUT OF.
597
00:20:31,621 --> 00:20:32,883
- MY NAME IS JENNA.
598
00:20:32,883 --> 00:20:34,972
THIS IS THE STORY OF HOW
I LOST MY VIRGINITY.
599
00:20:34,972 --> 00:20:35,973
- I'’LL BE IN THE CAR.
600
00:20:35,973 --> 00:20:37,061
- YOU WERE CLASSIC.
601
00:20:37,061 --> 00:20:38,454
- WHY'’D YOU COME TONIGHT?
602
00:20:38,454 --> 00:20:40,630
[cell phone vibrates]
- HOLD ON A SEC.
603
00:20:40,630 --> 00:20:42,066
- SO WHO IS THE GUY
YOU STAYED WITH?
604
00:20:42,066 --> 00:20:44,504
- COLLIN?
HE'’S IN MY CLASS.
42959
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