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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,611 --> 00:00:03,829 - PREVIOUSLY ON AWKWARD... 2 00:00:03,829 --> 00:00:05,396 - I'’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR MATTY. 3 00:00:05,396 --> 00:00:07,094 HE'’S HOT, AND I'’M NOT. WHAT DO YOU SEE IN ME? 4 00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:09,444 BLESS ME, FATHER, FOR I HAVE SINNED. 5 00:00:09,444 --> 00:00:10,662 I WAS THE GIRL WHO TRIED TO KILL HERSELF. 6 00:00:10,662 --> 00:00:12,664 IT WAS WEIRD. 7 00:00:12,664 --> 00:00:15,145 MY SUICIDE STORY, WHICH MADE ME A FREAK IN MY HIGH SCHOOL, 8 00:00:15,145 --> 00:00:16,233 MADE ME A HERO IN THEIRS. 9 00:00:20,585 --> 00:00:21,282 [Leah Lou & The 2 Left Shoes'’ Come Over] 10 00:00:21,282 --> 00:00:22,979 - ♪ I'’M A MESS AT BEST ♪ 11 00:00:22,979 --> 00:00:25,286 - ONCE AGAIN, HOMECOMING PINNING WAS IN PROCESS. 12 00:00:25,286 --> 00:00:27,766 - YES! YES! [squeals] 13 00:00:27,766 --> 00:00:29,551 - IT WAS AN ANCIENT PALOS HILLS TRADITION 14 00:00:29,551 --> 00:00:32,423 THAT WAS OTHERWISE KNOWN AS BLOODY THURSDAY 15 00:00:32,423 --> 00:00:34,208 BECAUSE, WHILE IT WAS AN HONOR TO GET STUCK, 16 00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:35,731 NO ONE KNEW THEIR WAY AROUND A PIN. 17 00:00:35,731 --> 00:00:36,775 - [gasps] 18 00:00:36,775 --> 00:00:38,864 - ♪ YOU 19 00:00:38,864 --> 00:00:40,040 ♪ COME OVER 20 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:40,997 - IS IT WEIRD THAT I'’M WORRIED 21 00:00:40,997 --> 00:00:42,607 I MIGHT NOT GET ONE? 22 00:00:42,607 --> 00:00:44,740 - GIRLFRIEND, LOOSEN UP YOUR POODLE SKIRT. 23 00:00:44,740 --> 00:00:46,568 MATTY IS NOT GONNA LEAVE YOU LACKING. 24 00:00:46,568 --> 00:00:47,873 - AS OUTDATED AS THE TRADITION WAS, 25 00:00:47,873 --> 00:00:49,745 THERE WAS SOMETHING ABOUT BEING OUTED 26 00:00:49,745 --> 00:00:51,834 BY YOUR DATE THAT WAS... 27 00:00:51,834 --> 00:00:54,967 - IS JENNA HAMILTON HERE? - SWEET. 28 00:00:54,967 --> 00:00:57,100 BUT IN MY EXCITEMENT TO BE A HAVE, 29 00:00:57,100 --> 00:00:59,885 I'’D FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE GIRLS WHO WERE STILL HAVE-NOTS, 30 00:00:59,885 --> 00:01:02,236 LIKE KIKI REYNOLDS AND MIA BRADY 31 00:01:02,236 --> 00:01:04,586 AND KRISTY PATTON. 32 00:01:04,586 --> 00:01:07,545 I KNEW WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO BE BARE-CHESTED. 33 00:01:07,545 --> 00:01:11,027 - JENNA HAMILTON, WILL YOU BE... 34 00:01:11,027 --> 00:01:11,767 - [laughs] MATTY'’S GIRL? 35 00:01:11,767 --> 00:01:14,248 YES, I WILL. 36 00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:15,684 - I'’M NOT SO SOLD ON THE SAFETY OF THIS PIN. 37 00:01:15,684 --> 00:01:17,512 - I CAN SHOW YOU HOW TO STICK IT. 38 00:01:17,512 --> 00:01:18,252 - OR I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO STICK IT. 39 00:01:18,252 --> 00:01:22,691 LATER. 40 00:01:22,691 --> 00:01:24,258 BYE. 41 00:01:24,258 --> 00:01:25,563 - MAYBE MY PIN DIDN'’T NEED TO BE A TICKET 42 00:01:25,563 --> 00:01:26,695 FOR THE GUILT TRAIN. 43 00:01:26,695 --> 00:01:27,826 MAYBE IT COULD JUST REMIND ME 44 00:01:27,826 --> 00:01:29,654 THAT I WAS LUCKY I HAD A BOYFRIEND. 45 00:01:29,654 --> 00:01:31,395 BESIDES, IT WASN'’T LIKE I WAS GONNA RUB IT 46 00:01:31,395 --> 00:01:32,483 IN ANYONE'’S FACE. 47 00:01:32,483 --> 00:01:34,964 [all gasp] OH. 48 00:01:34,964 --> 00:01:37,009 SORRY. 49 00:01:37,009 --> 00:01:38,576 OR MAYBE I WAS. 50 00:01:38,576 --> 00:01:40,100 [keyboard clicking] 51 00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,363 [boom] 52 00:01:42,363 --> 00:01:44,104 - ABOUT TIME WE ALL GET TO CLICK "LIKE" 53 00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:45,322 ON THIS BIZARRO RITUAL. 54 00:01:45,322 --> 00:01:46,758 ALTHOUGH I FORGOT TO WEAR A [bleep] SHIRT. 55 00:01:46,758 --> 00:01:48,586 - I DIDN'’T. 56 00:01:48,586 --> 00:01:50,893 AS EXPECTED, MY BEARD WAS A PRO AT THE PIN STICK. 57 00:01:50,893 --> 00:01:52,895 A LITTLE BLOOD COULD'’VE GONE A LONG WAY TO JAZZ MINE UP. 58 00:01:52,895 --> 00:01:54,331 - AT LEAST YOU GOT A PIN. 59 00:01:54,331 --> 00:01:55,985 REMEMBER WHAT IT FELT LIKE LAST YEAR? 60 00:01:55,985 --> 00:01:57,726 - OR THE YEAR BEFORE? - THAT'’S WHAT I'’M SAYING. 61 00:01:57,726 --> 00:01:59,728 DON'’T YOU GUYS HAVE ANY SURVIVOR'’S GUILT? 62 00:01:59,728 --> 00:02:02,644 IT JUST FEELS OBNOXIOUS TO FLAUNT OUR GOOD FORTUNE. 63 00:02:02,644 --> 00:02:03,732 MAYBE WE SHOULD TAKE THEM OFF. 64 00:02:03,732 --> 00:02:06,038 - OH, POP A CHILLAX-ATIVE, JENNA. 65 00:02:06,038 --> 00:02:08,737 THESE PINS ARE NOT GONNA MAKE ANY GIRL'’S SPIRAL GO VIRAL. 66 00:02:08,737 --> 00:02:11,566 - WHAT'’S THE POINT OF ALL THIS, ANYWAY? 67 00:02:11,566 --> 00:02:12,697 WE'’RE JUST GONNA SPEND HOURS GETTING READY, 68 00:02:12,697 --> 00:02:14,569 ONLY TO SWEAT THROUGH OUR DRESSES, 69 00:02:14,569 --> 00:02:15,918 SITTING ON OUR BOYFRIEND'’S LAP. 70 00:02:15,918 --> 00:02:17,659 - SHE IS A TRUTH-TALKER. - WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 71 00:02:17,659 --> 00:02:22,316 - MATTY. HE DOESN'’T EVEN DANCE. 72 00:02:22,316 --> 00:02:24,666 - BIG UPS ON THE LOVE MARKS, LADIES. 73 00:02:24,666 --> 00:02:27,147 WAY TO BE DATABLE. 74 00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:31,716 MISS PATTON, CAN YOU FOLLOW ME? 75 00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:33,718 - KRISTY PATTON, PRIME EXAMPLE. 76 00:02:33,718 --> 00:02:34,980 WE WERE B.F.F.s IN THE FOURTH GRADE, 77 00:02:34,980 --> 00:02:36,068 AND YES, I STOPPED BEING FRIENDS WITH HER 78 00:02:36,068 --> 00:02:37,505 WHEN SHE STARTED EATING CHALK, 79 00:02:37,505 --> 00:02:38,854 BUT I COULD JUST AS EASILY BE HER, 80 00:02:38,854 --> 00:02:40,725 HAVING A NO-DATE MELTDOWN TODAY. 81 00:02:40,725 --> 00:02:42,466 - UGH, MING, I CAN'’T HANDLE JENNA 82 00:02:42,466 --> 00:02:43,598 WHEN SHE'’S DOWN WITH A FROWN. 83 00:02:43,598 --> 00:02:46,209 HOW ABOUT A LITTLE BACKUP? 84 00:02:46,209 --> 00:02:49,517 - UH... 85 00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:51,214 - I'’M READY TO CALL IN MY FAVOR. 86 00:02:51,214 --> 00:02:52,694 - FAVOR? - DON'’T YOU REMEMBER 87 00:02:52,694 --> 00:02:54,870 WHEN I GOT YOU THE SANCTUARY TAPE LAST YEAR, 88 00:02:54,870 --> 00:02:57,220 AND YOU SAID IF THERE WAS EVER ANYTHING IN THE WORLD 89 00:02:57,220 --> 00:02:58,526 I NEEDED, YOU'’D DO IT? 90 00:02:58,526 --> 00:02:59,918 - THAT'’S NOT EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. 91 00:02:59,918 --> 00:03:01,137 - SINCE YOU'’RE ON THE HOMECOMING COMMITTEE 92 00:03:01,137 --> 00:03:02,747 FOR THE EAST MEETS WEST CLUB-- 93 00:03:02,747 --> 00:03:04,184 - ARE YOU CONFUSING ME WITH ANOTHER ASIAN? 94 00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:05,707 - YOU REPLACED THE FORMER REP, 95 00:03:05,707 --> 00:03:08,318 THE ONE WHO MYSTERIOUSLY DISAPPEARED. 96 00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:10,146 I THINK HIS NAME WAS FRED WU. 97 00:03:10,146 --> 00:03:11,974 - FRED WHO? - I DIDN'’T KNOW HIM EITHER. 98 00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:13,236 THE COMMITTEE'’S BEEN 99 00:03:13,236 --> 00:03:14,498 IN A DANCE THEME DEADLOCK FOR WEEKS. 100 00:03:14,498 --> 00:03:16,283 THE EMERGENCY VOTE IS THIS AFTERNOON. 101 00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:18,459 IT'’S DOWN TO GREAT BALL OF CHINA AND TROPIC LIKE IT'’S HOT. 102 00:03:18,459 --> 00:03:22,985 - OH, SO YOU WANT ME TO VOTE CHINA? 103 00:03:22,985 --> 00:03:24,769 - YOU SHOULDN'’T JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS. 104 00:03:24,769 --> 00:03:27,555 YOU AREN'’T VERY GOOD AT IT. 105 00:03:27,555 --> 00:03:30,253 I NEED YOU TO MAKE GREAT BALL LOSE. 106 00:03:30,253 --> 00:03:32,212 - I DON'’T UNDERSTAND. 107 00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,648 - ALL YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND 108 00:03:33,648 --> 00:03:35,693 IS THAT THERE'’S NOTHING TO UNDERSTAND. 109 00:03:35,693 --> 00:03:37,173 - SO DO I EVEN HAVE A CHOICE? 110 00:03:37,173 --> 00:03:39,828 both: [giggling] 111 00:03:39,828 --> 00:03:41,786 - DON'’T BE SILLY. OF COURSE YOU DO. 112 00:03:41,786 --> 00:03:45,181 - OH. - [giggles] 113 00:03:45,181 --> 00:03:46,791 [speaking foreign language] 114 00:03:46,791 --> 00:03:49,272 - YOU WANT TO DOUBLE-CROSS A DOUBLE-CROSSER? 115 00:03:49,272 --> 00:03:50,926 - I'’M WEIGHING MY OPTIONS. 116 00:03:50,926 --> 00:03:52,928 - OH, WELL, DROP YOUR OPTIONS BACK ON THE SCALE 117 00:03:52,928 --> 00:03:54,451 BECAUSE THE ONLY WAY THIS IS GONNA END 118 00:03:54,451 --> 00:03:55,887 IS WITH YOU ON A SLOW BOAT TO CHINA. 119 00:03:55,887 --> 00:03:57,280 - THIS MIGHT BE MY CHANCE TO GET BACK AT HER 120 00:03:57,280 --> 00:03:58,890 FOR ALL THE [bleep] SHE'’S DONE TO ME. 121 00:03:58,890 --> 00:04:01,197 JENNA! THOUGHTS? 122 00:04:01,197 --> 00:04:03,678 - HAMILTON, REIN IN THE OBSESSING STRESSING. 123 00:04:03,678 --> 00:04:05,027 KRISTY PATTON IS FINE. 124 00:04:05,027 --> 00:04:07,159 MAYBE MATTY USED TOXIC PAINT ON HER PIN. 125 00:04:07,159 --> 00:04:08,117 HOW MANY FINGERS AM I HOLDING UP? 126 00:04:08,117 --> 00:04:09,771 - TWO. AND A THUMB. 127 00:04:09,771 --> 00:04:12,730 - HEY. 128 00:04:12,730 --> 00:04:13,731 YOU DON'’T HAVE TO WEAR THE PIN. 129 00:04:13,731 --> 00:04:15,080 - WHY WOULDN'’T I? 130 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,604 - I DON'’T KNOW. IT'’S KIND OF OBNOXIOUS. 131 00:04:16,604 --> 00:04:18,301 BUT, TO MY CREDIT, NOT AS OBNOXIOUS 132 00:04:18,301 --> 00:04:19,084 AS HILLARY MATTHEWS'’. 133 00:04:19,084 --> 00:04:20,085 [cow bells jingling] 134 00:04:20,085 --> 00:04:21,696 - OBNOXIOUS. 135 00:04:21,696 --> 00:04:23,350 THAT WAS MY WORD. 136 00:04:23,350 --> 00:04:25,265 BUT I HADN'’T SHARED IT WITH MATTY, WHICH MEANT... 137 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,267 T, NEED A NAPKIN? - I GOT ONE. 138 00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:28,529 - WILL YOU WALK WITH ME TO GET ONE? 139 00:04:28,529 --> 00:04:29,791 - THERE'’S A WHOLE STACK RIGHT HERE. 140 00:04:29,791 --> 00:04:30,922 - THOSE AREN'’T SUBSTANTIAL. 141 00:04:30,922 --> 00:04:33,577 I NEED A SUBSTANTIAL NAPKIN 142 00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:37,973 AND YOUR HELP IN CARRYING IT. 143 00:04:37,973 --> 00:04:39,583 - WHAT'’S WITH THE TWITCH-SITCH? 144 00:04:39,583 --> 00:04:41,368 "NAPKIN" ISN'’T ANY OF THE CODES I KNOW. 145 00:04:41,368 --> 00:04:43,413 - WHAT ABOUT GIRL CODE? DO YOU KNOW THAT ONE? 146 00:04:43,413 --> 00:04:45,459 WHY DID YOU TELL MATTY WHAT I SAID ABOUT THE PIN? 147 00:04:45,459 --> 00:04:46,938 - I DIDN'’T TELL MATTY. 148 00:04:46,938 --> 00:04:49,854 I JUST MAYBE TOLD JAKE. BUT JAKE AND I-- 149 00:04:49,854 --> 00:04:51,073 - TELL EACH OTHER EVERYTHING. I'’VE HEARD. 150 00:04:51,073 --> 00:04:54,119 BUT YOUR SHARING IS GETTING BACK TO MY RELATIONSHIP. 151 00:04:54,119 --> 00:04:56,296 PLEASE STOP TALKING TO JAKE ABOUT MATTY AND ME. 152 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:57,514 - OKAY. FINE. 153 00:04:57,514 --> 00:04:58,994 EVEN IF JAKE WANTS TO TALK 154 00:04:58,994 --> 00:05:00,952 ABOUT YOU OR MATTY, I WON'’T. - SOUNDS GOOD. 155 00:05:00,952 --> 00:05:02,084 - LIKE, EVEN IF I FIND OUT MATTY WANTS TO BUY YOU 156 00:05:02,084 --> 00:05:04,347 A STUFFED ANIMAL FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY, 157 00:05:04,347 --> 00:05:07,437 I'’LL JUST LET IT HAPPEN. 158 00:05:07,437 --> 00:05:10,179 - UH, I HAVE TO GO DO A-A THING. 159 00:05:10,179 --> 00:05:11,441 - ♪ HE SAYS HE'’S READY ♪ 160 00:05:11,441 --> 00:05:12,877 ♪ THEN HE MAKES ME WAIT 161 00:05:12,877 --> 00:05:14,401 - IF KRISTY WAS ABOUT TO GET TO SECOND BASE 162 00:05:14,401 --> 00:05:16,403 WITH A PIN, THEN I'’D BE ABLE 163 00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:19,449 TO TUCK MY GUILT TO SLEEP. 164 00:05:19,449 --> 00:05:21,582 BUT THE ACTION WAS ALL IN MY HEAD. 165 00:05:21,582 --> 00:05:22,931 KRISTY WASN'’T GETTING PINNED, 166 00:05:22,931 --> 00:05:26,326 WHICH WAS MAKING HER TOO DEPRESSED TO EAT... 167 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:29,329 - ♪ WELL, THERE'’S NO PLACE I'’D RATHER BE ♪ 168 00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:32,506 - AND CAUSING HER TO OLD-SCHOOL BLOG OUT HER FEELINGS... 169 00:05:32,506 --> 00:05:34,899 - ♪ THAN HERE WITH YOU IN FRONT OF ME ♪ 170 00:05:34,899 --> 00:05:38,599 - AND SHARE HER SOB STORY WITH VAL. 171 00:05:38,599 --> 00:05:42,298 UNFORTUNATELY, MY GUILT TRIP WASN'’T GOING ANYWHERE. 172 00:05:42,298 --> 00:05:44,692 WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT KRISTY. 173 00:05:44,692 --> 00:05:47,259 - OH, IT IS SO SWEET OF YOU TO TAKE AN INTEREST 174 00:05:47,259 --> 00:05:49,392 IN THE BOTTOM FEEDERS OF THE SOCIAL AQUARIUM, 175 00:05:49,392 --> 00:05:51,002 BUT I CANNOT DISCUSS OTHER STUDENTS'’ PROBLEMS. 176 00:05:51,002 --> 00:05:53,004 - I'’M JUST REALLY WORRIED ABOUT HER. 177 00:05:53,004 --> 00:05:55,355 - MM, WELL, 178 00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:58,358 MAYBE WE CAN DISCUSS... 179 00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:00,795 OUR MUTUAL FRIEND... 180 00:06:00,795 --> 00:06:03,275 STAPLER. 181 00:06:03,275 --> 00:06:05,756 STAPLER IS IN A DARK PLACE, J. 182 00:06:05,756 --> 00:06:08,759 HE IS JUST CAREENING DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE. 183 00:06:08,759 --> 00:06:11,327 AND IF YOU THINK LIFE TOPSIDE IS TOUGH, 184 00:06:11,327 --> 00:06:12,546 IT IS WORSE DOWN BELOW. 185 00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:15,505 YOU KNOW, STAPLER REMINDS ME A LOT 186 00:06:15,505 --> 00:06:17,855 OF WHO YOU COULD'’VE BEEN HAD OUR PATHS NEVER CROSSED. 187 00:06:17,855 --> 00:06:19,161 - ARE YOU SUGGESTING WE NEED TO START 188 00:06:19,161 --> 00:06:20,510 A KRISTY WATCH? 189 00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:21,729 - OH, I'’M WATCHING HER VERY CLOSELY, 190 00:06:21,729 --> 00:06:23,078 AND I GAVE HER MY BEST ADVICE. 191 00:06:23,078 --> 00:06:24,209 - WHICH WAS? 192 00:06:24,209 --> 00:06:26,124 - AVOID THE DANCE. 193 00:06:26,124 --> 00:06:27,561 [timer dings] 194 00:06:27,561 --> 00:06:28,692 UGH, I HATE TO KICK YOU OUT, 195 00:06:28,692 --> 00:06:30,259 BUT PIN DAY IS MY BUSIEST DAY 196 00:06:30,259 --> 00:06:31,347 OF THE YEAR, 197 00:06:31,347 --> 00:06:32,348 JUST A BIG OL'’ TRAIL OF TEARS 198 00:06:32,348 --> 00:06:34,306 TO AND FROM MY OFFICE. 199 00:06:34,306 --> 00:06:35,786 - VAL'’S ADVICE TO AVOID THE DANCE 200 00:06:35,786 --> 00:06:38,398 WASN'’T REVOLUTIONARY, 201 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:40,574 CONSIDERING KRISTY DIDN'’T HAVE A DATE. 202 00:06:40,574 --> 00:06:42,880 BUT SHE HAD A POINT, AND I SUDDENLY HAD A PLAN. 203 00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:44,578 I CAN'’T WEAR THE PIN. 204 00:06:44,578 --> 00:06:46,275 IT'’S NOT THAT I DON'’T LOVE THAT YOU MADE IT FOR ME. 205 00:06:46,275 --> 00:06:48,799 I MEAN, I REALLY AM IMPRESSED WITH YOUR CRAFTSMANSHIP. 206 00:06:48,799 --> 00:06:50,410 PIPE CLEANERS ARE TRICKY. 207 00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,542 BUT I CAN'’T SUPPORT A TRADITION 208 00:06:52,542 --> 00:06:55,327 THAT MAKES OTHER GIRLS FEEL BAD ABOUT THEMSELVES. 209 00:06:55,327 --> 00:06:57,373 BECAUSE I DON'’T THINK ANYONE SHOULD HAVE TO FEEL LESS THAN. 210 00:06:57,373 --> 00:07:00,158 - ♪ EVERY NOW AND THEN 211 00:07:00,158 --> 00:07:01,377 ♪ I WOULD TRY TO START AGAIN 212 00:07:01,377 --> 00:07:02,987 - OKAY. YOU DON'’T HAVE TO WEAR IT. 213 00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:04,380 - ♪ JUST ENOUGH TO PULL YOU 214 00:07:04,380 --> 00:07:06,382 - BUT WILL YOU STILL KEEP IT? 215 00:07:06,382 --> 00:07:08,602 - EVEN WITH THE PIN OFF MY SHIRT, 216 00:07:08,602 --> 00:07:09,994 MY CHEST WAS STILL HEAVY. 217 00:07:09,994 --> 00:07:12,040 MAYBE IF I REALLY WANTED TO STAND UP 218 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:14,434 TO THIS TRADITION, I NEEDED TO SIT IT OUT. 219 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:15,739 IT'’S NOT JUST THE PIN. IT'’S THE DANCE. 220 00:07:15,739 --> 00:07:18,655 I CAN'’T GO. I'’M SORRY. 221 00:07:23,399 --> 00:07:25,357 - SILENCIO, POR FAVOR. 222 00:07:25,357 --> 00:07:27,229 I HAVE JUST TALLIED THE THIRD ROUND 223 00:07:27,229 --> 00:07:28,665 OF SILENT BALLOTS. 224 00:07:28,665 --> 00:07:30,493 - THIS ALL COULD'’VE BEEN DONE WEEKS AGO 225 00:07:30,493 --> 00:07:32,539 IF I STILL HAD UNIVERSAL POWER. 226 00:07:32,539 --> 00:07:34,149 - ON THAT NOTE, THE BALLOTS SAY 227 00:07:34,149 --> 00:07:36,412 THAT CHEERLEADERS SHOULD RUN CONCESSIONS THIS YEAR. 228 00:07:36,412 --> 00:07:37,631 I THINK YOU'’RE REALLY GONNA ROCK 229 00:07:37,631 --> 00:07:39,197 THE APRON/HAIR NET COMBO. 230 00:07:39,197 --> 00:07:40,503 - WATCH IT WITH THE '’TUDE, TWIGGY, 231 00:07:40,503 --> 00:07:42,592 OR I WILL BREAK YOU IN HALF. 232 00:07:42,592 --> 00:07:44,072 - WITH YOUR GIANT MAN HANDS? 233 00:07:44,072 --> 00:07:46,204 [all gasp] 234 00:07:46,204 --> 00:07:49,556 WE HAVE A TIE BETWEEN... 235 00:07:49,556 --> 00:07:52,384 TROPIC LIKE IT'’S HOT AND... 236 00:07:52,384 --> 00:07:54,517 GREAT BALL OF CHINA. 237 00:07:54,517 --> 00:07:57,433 REPS FROM EACH CLUB, PREPARE YOUR FINAL PITCHES. 238 00:08:02,177 --> 00:08:03,613 - HEY! 239 00:08:03,613 --> 00:08:06,007 SO. 240 00:08:06,007 --> 00:08:08,966 DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF A MANIPULATIVE BITCH? 241 00:08:08,966 --> 00:08:11,229 RIGHT. OKAY. 242 00:08:11,229 --> 00:08:14,232 UM, AS A... 243 00:08:14,232 --> 00:08:16,017 MANIPULATIVE BITCH, 244 00:08:16,017 --> 00:08:17,148 IF YOU ASK SOMEONE TO DO SOMETHING, 245 00:08:17,148 --> 00:08:18,672 DO YOU WANT THEM TO DO IT? 246 00:08:18,672 --> 00:08:20,630 OR DO YOU ASK THEM THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU WANT, 247 00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:22,414 KNOWING THEY KNOW YOU'’RE A BITCH 248 00:08:22,414 --> 00:08:23,677 AND MIGHT NOT DO IT? 249 00:08:23,677 --> 00:08:25,287 - IF I TELL SOMEONE TO DO SOMETHING, 250 00:08:25,287 --> 00:08:27,028 I WANT IT DONE, 251 00:08:27,028 --> 00:08:29,291 LIKE I WANT YOU TO TAKE YOUR DUMB-ASS QUESTIONS 252 00:08:29,291 --> 00:08:31,598 AND YOUR ANDROGYNOUS WARDROBE 253 00:08:31,598 --> 00:08:34,992 AND GO AWAY. 254 00:08:34,992 --> 00:08:38,692 - OHH. SO BECCA DOES WANT GREAT BALL TO LOSE. 255 00:08:38,692 --> 00:08:39,693 WHICH MEANS... 256 00:08:39,693 --> 00:08:43,218 1930s SHANGHAI. 257 00:08:43,218 --> 00:08:45,960 OPIUM SMOKE FILLS THE AIR. 258 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:50,530 PAPER LANTERNS DANCE ACROSS A HARVEST MOON. 259 00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,662 AND TINY TRIANGLES 260 00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:56,187 OF FOIL-WRAPPED CHICKEN. 261 00:08:56,187 --> 00:08:59,582 [Chinese string music] 262 00:09:02,150 --> 00:09:03,847 [cheers] 263 00:09:03,847 --> 00:09:06,981 BECCA CAN SUCK MY BIG FAT-- 264 00:09:06,981 --> 00:09:08,330 - WOODY. 265 00:09:08,330 --> 00:09:11,376 WOODY LOVERIDGE WOULD BE PERFECT FOR KRISTY. 266 00:09:11,376 --> 00:09:14,031 [soft rock music playing] 267 00:09:14,031 --> 00:09:16,251 - [squeals] LET ME SEE YOUR PIN. AH! 268 00:09:16,251 --> 00:09:18,993 OOH, CRAFTY. 269 00:09:18,993 --> 00:09:20,429 WHY AREN'’T YOU WEARING IT? I WANT TO SEE IT ON. 270 00:09:20,429 --> 00:09:21,691 - I'’M NOT PUTTING IT ON, 271 00:09:21,691 --> 00:09:23,432 AND I'’M NOT GOING TO THE DANCE. 272 00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:25,173 - DID YOU BREAK UP? - NO! 273 00:09:25,173 --> 00:09:27,392 - MATTY DOESN'’T WANT TO GO. - NO. I DON'’T. 274 00:09:27,392 --> 00:09:29,177 I DON'’T WANT TO BE A PART OF SOMETHING 275 00:09:29,177 --> 00:09:31,135 THAT MAKES GIRLS WITHOUT DATES FEEL BAD. 276 00:09:31,135 --> 00:09:33,181 - BUT THAT'’S PART OF WHAT'’S SO GREAT ABOUT HAVING A DATE. 277 00:09:33,181 --> 00:09:34,574 - NO, YOU DON'’T GET IT. 278 00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:35,792 I DON'’T WANT TO SINGLE OUT THE SINGLES. 279 00:09:35,792 --> 00:09:37,185 I'’VE BEEN THERE, AND IT SUCKS. 280 00:09:37,185 --> 00:09:38,752 - BUT YOU'’RE NOT THERE ANYMORE. - I KNOW. 281 00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:40,449 AND SOMEONE NEEDS TO TAKE A STAND 282 00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:41,537 BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE HURTING. 283 00:09:41,537 --> 00:09:43,017 - DOES MATTY WANT TO GO? 284 00:09:43,017 --> 00:09:45,323 - YES. - SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. 285 00:09:45,323 --> 00:09:47,064 YOU'’RE HURTING SOMEONE YOU LOVE 286 00:09:47,064 --> 00:09:49,240 TO AVOID HURTING PEOPLE YOU BARELY KNOW, 287 00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:51,852 WHO, BY THE WAY, WILL BE SITTING AT HOME 288 00:09:51,852 --> 00:09:54,202 AND WILL NEVER KNOW YOU WENT TO THE DANCE ANYWAY. 289 00:09:54,202 --> 00:09:55,290 WHO WINS HERE? 290 00:09:55,290 --> 00:09:57,466 - ME, BECAUSE I'’M TAKING A STAND. 291 00:09:57,466 --> 00:09:59,207 - WELL, IT'’S A DUMB STAND. - WELL, YOU'’RE A DUMB MOM. 292 00:09:59,207 --> 00:10:01,775 - AND YOU ARE A CRAZY TEENAGER, 293 00:10:01,775 --> 00:10:03,385 AND A SELFISH ONE AT THAT, 294 00:10:03,385 --> 00:10:05,517 BECAUSE PROTESTING THE DANCE DOESN'’T HELP ANYONE, 295 00:10:05,517 --> 00:10:06,388 AND IT HURTS MATTY. 296 00:10:06,388 --> 00:10:10,392 IT IS HIS NIGHT TOO. 297 00:10:10,392 --> 00:10:11,959 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - CALLING MATTY. 298 00:10:11,959 --> 00:10:13,134 YOU'’RE GOING. 299 00:10:13,134 --> 00:10:14,439 TALK. 300 00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:16,616 [line rings] 301 00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,227 - HEY. - HEY. 302 00:10:19,227 --> 00:10:21,925 SORRY YOU HAD FRONT ROW SEATS TO THE FREAK SHOW EARLIER. 303 00:10:21,925 --> 00:10:24,624 DO YOU WANT TO GO TO THE DANCE? 304 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:27,148 - DO YOU WANT TO GO? - IF YOU WANT TO GO. 305 00:10:27,148 --> 00:10:28,584 - I THINK IT MIGHT BE FUN, BUT I DON'’T WANT TO MAKE YOU GO. 306 00:10:28,584 --> 00:10:30,281 - I DON'’T WANT TO MAKE YOU NOT GO. 307 00:10:30,281 --> 00:10:33,502 - THEN LET'’S GO. - GREAT, CAN'’T WAIT. 308 00:10:35,852 --> 00:10:38,812 - HMM. 309 00:10:38,812 --> 00:10:41,162 HOMECOMING'’S BACK ON. 310 00:10:41,162 --> 00:10:42,685 BUT I AM CONFUSED. 311 00:10:42,685 --> 00:10:44,992 SHE DIDN'’T WANT TO GO. NOW SHE WANTS TO GO. 312 00:10:44,992 --> 00:10:46,515 DO YOU KNOW WHAT'’S UP? 313 00:10:46,515 --> 00:10:47,516 - I KNOW NOTHING. 314 00:10:47,516 --> 00:10:49,300 - MM, YOU KNOW SOMETHING. 315 00:10:49,300 --> 00:10:50,475 - NO, I DON'’T. - WHAT DO YOU KNOW? 316 00:10:50,475 --> 00:10:53,740 - NOTHING. 317 00:10:53,740 --> 00:10:55,698 NO. 318 00:10:55,698 --> 00:10:57,178 guys: ♪ DO-DO DO-DO - NO! NO! 319 00:10:57,178 --> 00:10:59,136 NO NO NO! STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP! 320 00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:01,051 JENNA'’S UPSET MATTY DOESN'’T DANCE! 321 00:11:01,051 --> 00:11:03,010 I AM SO DEAD. 322 00:11:03,010 --> 00:11:05,012 - SO IT WAS ABOUT ME. 323 00:11:05,012 --> 00:11:06,361 - YOU SHOULD GO. 324 00:11:06,361 --> 00:11:08,624 - UH! YOU ARE JUST GONNA TICKLE AND TOSS ME? 325 00:11:08,624 --> 00:11:12,976 - I'’M SORRY. I GOTTA CALL BRO CODE. 326 00:11:12,976 --> 00:11:15,022 OKAY. 327 00:11:15,022 --> 00:11:16,153 I'’M GONNA BREAK IT DOWN FOR YOU. 328 00:11:16,153 --> 00:11:17,372 YOU GOTTA BREAK IT DOWN. 329 00:11:17,372 --> 00:11:18,678 - I CAN'’T. 330 00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:19,504 - WELL, YOU HAVE TO. 331 00:11:19,504 --> 00:11:21,245 - I REALLY CANNOT DANCE. 332 00:11:21,245 --> 00:11:22,899 I'’M--I'’M BAD. 333 00:11:22,899 --> 00:11:25,641 - AND THAT... IS WHY YOU HAVE ME. 334 00:11:25,641 --> 00:11:27,034 - NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. 335 00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:28,296 WE'’RE NOT FOOTLOOSING. 336 00:11:28,296 --> 00:11:30,472 - HA, LIKE YOU'’RE READY FOR A WAREHOUSE. 337 00:11:30,472 --> 00:11:31,386 - I DON'’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. 338 00:11:31,386 --> 00:11:33,780 - NEVER MIND. 339 00:11:33,780 --> 00:11:36,957 HELP ME MOVE THIS. 340 00:11:36,957 --> 00:11:39,960 [upbeat dance music] 341 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,049 ♪ 342 00:11:42,049 --> 00:11:44,704 - ♪ YOU NEVER SAW IT GOOD 343 00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,401 - YOU'’RE GONNA GRAPEVINE, AND GRAPEVINE, 344 00:11:46,401 --> 00:11:49,056 AND SPRINKLER, SPRINKLER, SPRINKLER, 345 00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:51,319 TWIST, TWIST, TWIST, OH, YEAH! 346 00:11:51,319 --> 00:11:53,538 LET ME SLOW IT DOWN FOR YOU, OKAY? 347 00:11:53,538 --> 00:11:54,844 GRAPEVINE. 348 00:11:54,844 --> 00:11:56,716 GRAPEVINE. 349 00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:58,848 SPRINKLER. SPRINKLER. 350 00:11:58,848 --> 00:12:00,110 - THESE ARE THE BASICS? - YEAH. 351 00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:00,807 I'’M NOT EVEN GIVING YOU AN EIGHT-COUNT. 352 00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:02,069 I'’M JUST FREESTYLING. 353 00:12:02,069 --> 00:12:03,070 - THERE IS NO WAY I CAN DO THIS. 354 00:12:03,070 --> 00:12:04,288 - OKAY, OKAY, 355 00:12:04,288 --> 00:12:05,986 MAYBE I'’M GETTING AHEAD OF MYSELF. 356 00:12:05,986 --> 00:12:07,030 LET ME LET YOU IN ON A LITTLE SECRET, 357 00:12:07,030 --> 00:12:08,118 PASSED DOWN THROUGH GENERATIONS 358 00:12:08,118 --> 00:12:09,729 OF ROSATI MEN: 359 00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:12,296 YOU JUST...GOTTA...GIVE... 360 00:12:12,296 --> 00:12:15,125 GOOD...FACE. 361 00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:16,431 WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT RIGHT NOW? 362 00:12:16,431 --> 00:12:18,215 YOU'’RE LOOKIN'’ AT MY FACE. 363 00:12:18,215 --> 00:12:20,348 - YEAH. - HA, HA, RIGHT? 364 00:12:20,348 --> 00:12:21,915 - YEAH! - YEAH. 365 00:12:21,915 --> 00:12:24,352 - YEAH. - HEY. 366 00:12:24,352 --> 00:12:25,657 ALL RIGHT. 367 00:12:25,657 --> 00:12:28,748 - HA! - OH, YEAH. 368 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,053 WE'’RE GONNA HAVE YOU MAKING DANCE MAGIC IN NO TIME, MAN. 369 00:12:30,053 --> 00:12:31,794 - [exhales] 370 00:12:31,794 --> 00:12:32,795 - OH, YEAH! 371 00:12:32,795 --> 00:12:34,405 [energetic dance music] 372 00:12:34,405 --> 00:12:39,497 ♪ 373 00:12:39,497 --> 00:12:40,977 - WHAT TIME IS IT? 374 00:12:40,977 --> 00:12:42,587 I THOUGHT THEY WOULD BE HERE BY NOW. 375 00:12:42,587 --> 00:12:45,329 WHY DID THEY WANT TO MEET US? - MATTY WOULDN'’T SAY. 376 00:12:45,329 --> 00:12:47,767 ♪ 377 00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,333 DID KRISTY PATTON GET A DATE? 378 00:12:49,333 --> 00:12:50,987 - UNTIL YESTERDAY, I HADN'’T EVEN HEARD OF HER, 379 00:12:50,987 --> 00:12:53,947 SO MY INTEL ON HER DATING LIFE ISNADABOOM. 380 00:12:53,947 --> 00:12:55,383 - IF KRISTY WASN'’T A SAD SINGLE, 381 00:12:55,383 --> 00:12:57,646 I COULD FLIP OFF MY GUILT SWITCH AND FINALLY-- 382 00:12:57,646 --> 00:12:59,735 - RELAX, DUDE. 383 00:12:59,735 --> 00:13:01,171 HEY, IT'’LL BE OVER BEFORE YOU KNOW IT. 384 00:13:01,171 --> 00:13:03,434 [muffled dance music] 385 00:13:03,434 --> 00:13:05,741 LET'’S SEE THOSE FACES. 386 00:13:05,741 --> 00:13:07,134 COME ON. GIVE IT TO ME. 387 00:13:07,134 --> 00:13:09,353 - UH. OOH, OOH, OOH. 388 00:13:09,353 --> 00:13:12,530 HA. 389 00:13:12,530 --> 00:13:15,446 - YOU'’RE AS GOOD AS IT GETS. 390 00:13:15,446 --> 00:13:17,753 [upbeat dance music] 391 00:13:17,753 --> 00:13:19,886 [indistinct chatter] 392 00:13:19,886 --> 00:13:21,365 - MING. 393 00:13:21,365 --> 00:13:23,324 HONGHUI. 394 00:13:23,324 --> 00:13:25,282 - IS THAT YOUR REAL NAME? 395 00:13:25,282 --> 00:13:28,851 WHAT'’S UP WITH THE WITHHOLDING? 396 00:13:28,851 --> 00:13:30,766 - SO, GREAT BALL OF CHINA WON. 397 00:13:30,766 --> 00:13:32,812 - YEAH, CRAZY, RIGHT? 398 00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:34,204 I TALKED ABOUT FEET BINDING 399 00:13:34,204 --> 00:13:36,990 AND HOW HARD IT IS TO EAT WITH CHOPSTICKS, 400 00:13:36,990 --> 00:13:41,690 AND PEOPLE STILL THOUGHT IT SOUNDED LIKE A PARTY. 401 00:13:41,690 --> 00:13:43,692 - I KNOW WHAT YOU DID IN THE MEETING. 402 00:13:43,692 --> 00:13:44,998 BUT DON'’T WORRY. 403 00:13:44,998 --> 00:13:46,347 I WANTED GREAT BALL TO WIN. 404 00:13:46,347 --> 00:13:47,652 I GOT ALL THIS ASIAN CRAP 405 00:13:47,652 --> 00:13:49,089 FOR FIVE CENTS ON THE DOLLAR. 406 00:13:49,089 --> 00:13:50,307 NOW WE HAVE THE REST OF THE DANCE BUDGET 407 00:13:50,307 --> 00:13:52,266 TO PAY FOR OUR WINTER SKI TRIP. 408 00:13:52,266 --> 00:13:53,484 - YOU GET TO KEEP THE EXTRA MONEY? 409 00:13:53,484 --> 00:13:56,183 - WE HAVE A VERY GOOD ACCOUNTANT. 410 00:13:56,183 --> 00:13:57,749 ENJOY THE DANCE. 411 00:13:57,749 --> 00:13:59,099 [gasps] AND TRY THE DIM SUM. 412 00:13:59,099 --> 00:14:02,363 THE SOY SAUCE HAS AN EXTRA KICK. 413 00:14:02,363 --> 00:14:03,668 [speaking foreign language] 414 00:14:03,668 --> 00:14:05,279 [giggles] 415 00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:11,415 - YOUR ADVICE SUCKED. - WHAT ADVICE? 416 00:14:11,415 --> 00:14:14,027 - AT THE HOMECOMING HEARING. YOU SCREWED ME. 417 00:14:14,027 --> 00:14:16,377 - I DON'’T CARE ENOUGH ABOUT YOU TO SCREW YOU. 418 00:14:16,377 --> 00:14:18,248 - WHERE DID I GO WRONG? 419 00:14:18,248 --> 00:14:20,381 - [gasps] SORRY, SLIM SADIE. 420 00:14:20,381 --> 00:14:23,079 COULD BARELY EVEN SEE YOU THERE. 421 00:14:23,079 --> 00:14:24,689 [chuckles] KIDDING! 422 00:14:24,689 --> 00:14:26,169 WHO COULDN'’T SEE YOU? 423 00:14:26,169 --> 00:14:27,649 - BUMP ME AGAIN, AND I WILL SHOVE 424 00:14:27,649 --> 00:14:29,564 ONE OF THESE STUPID ASIAN DUMPLINGS 425 00:14:29,564 --> 00:14:30,870 SO FAR UP YOUR ASS, 426 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:34,612 YOU'’LL START SPEAKING BROKEN ENGLISH. 427 00:14:34,612 --> 00:14:36,745 - [giggling] 428 00:14:36,745 --> 00:14:39,400 - [exhales] 429 00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:42,446 - I ASKED A WHITE BITCH FOR ASIAN BITCH ADVICE. 430 00:14:42,446 --> 00:14:44,492 [bleep] ME. 431 00:14:44,492 --> 00:14:45,536 - HEY. - HEY. 432 00:14:45,536 --> 00:14:47,451 - WHAT TOOK YOU GUYS SO LONG? 433 00:14:47,451 --> 00:14:50,106 - JAKE HAD BAD TACOS. - MATTY HAD BAD TACOS. 434 00:14:50,106 --> 00:14:51,673 - WHATEVER. 435 00:14:51,673 --> 00:14:54,154 YOU CAN KEEP YOUR BROMO-EROTIC SECRETS TO YOURSELF. 436 00:14:54,154 --> 00:14:56,156 BUT, JAKE, CAN WE GO HIP-LOCK ALREADY? 437 00:14:56,156 --> 00:15:00,073 - OOH. TALK DIRTY TO ME, BABY. 438 00:15:00,073 --> 00:15:01,422 - WHILE THEY WENT TO GRIND, 439 00:15:01,422 --> 00:15:03,641 I WOULD BE LAP-LOCKED IN THREE, TWO-- 440 00:15:03,641 --> 00:15:05,469 - ONE SEC, JAKE. 441 00:15:05,469 --> 00:15:08,342 [romantic hip-hop music] 442 00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:10,779 - UGH, I WISH OUR BOYFRIENDS WOULD BREAK UP. 443 00:15:10,779 --> 00:15:12,868 - I CAN'’T DANCE TO THIS SONG. IT'’S TOO SLOW. 444 00:15:12,868 --> 00:15:14,565 I WON'’T BE ABLE TO DISTRACT PEOPLE WITH MY FACE. 445 00:15:14,565 --> 00:15:16,219 - OKAY. 446 00:15:16,219 --> 00:15:17,917 I HEARD THERE'’S A SECRET MENU AT THE DIM SUM CART 447 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,440 WHERE IF YOU ASK FOR "PLUM SURPRISE", 448 00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,616 YOU GET SOY SAUCE PACKETS FULL OF LIQUOR. 449 00:15:21,616 --> 00:15:23,009 WHY DON'’T WE GET A COUPLE OF THOSE, CALM YOU DOWN? 450 00:15:23,009 --> 00:15:24,010 - YEAH, THAT SOUNDS GOOD. 451 00:15:24,010 --> 00:15:26,926 - HEY, WE'’LL BE RIGHT BACK. 452 00:15:29,450 --> 00:15:31,365 - THE DOUBLE-CROSSER DOUBLE-CROSSED ME, 453 00:15:31,365 --> 00:15:33,193 BUT I WILL TAKE HER DOWN. 454 00:15:33,193 --> 00:15:34,542 - HATE TO BLOW OUT YOUR HATE-SCHEME PIPE DREAM, 455 00:15:34,542 --> 00:15:36,587 BUT BECCA'’S ALWAYS THREE STEPS AHEAD. 456 00:15:36,587 --> 00:15:38,894 ACTUALLY, SHE HAS TINY FEET. MAKE THAT FIVE. 457 00:15:38,894 --> 00:15:39,895 - T'’S RIGHT. 458 00:15:39,895 --> 00:15:40,940 SHE PROBABLY ALREADY KNOWS 459 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,158 YOU'’RE TRYING TO RETALIATE. 460 00:15:42,158 --> 00:15:44,160 - NO, SHE THINKS I'’M SCARED AGAIN. 461 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:46,641 THERE'’S NO WAY SHE KNOWS I'’M LONG-HAULING MY REVENGE. 462 00:15:46,641 --> 00:15:48,251 [cell phone blips] 463 00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:55,128 - HOLY [bleep]. 464 00:15:55,128 --> 00:15:56,738 - [chuckles weakly] HENRY. 465 00:15:56,738 --> 00:15:59,697 WE GOTTA GO. [laughs] 466 00:15:59,697 --> 00:16:03,614 DO YOUR PARENTS HAVE A FALLOUT SHELTER? 467 00:16:03,614 --> 00:16:05,355 - YOU WOULD NEVER COME TO THE DANCE ALONE, WOULD YOU? 468 00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:06,356 - LET'’S REWIND TO AN HOUR AGO, 469 00:16:06,356 --> 00:16:07,792 WHEN WE DROVE OURSELVES HERE. 470 00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:09,142 - BUT WE HAD DATES, AND WHEN WE DIDN'’T, 471 00:16:09,142 --> 00:16:10,795 WE WERE NO-SHOWS. 472 00:16:10,795 --> 00:16:12,449 - LOOP ME IN ON YOUR SPIRAL. 473 00:16:12,449 --> 00:16:14,103 - I HAVEN'’T ACTUALLY SEEN KRISTY WITH A GUY ALL NIGHT. 474 00:16:14,103 --> 00:16:17,411 - AGAIN WITH THE PATTON PATROL? 475 00:16:17,411 --> 00:16:20,631 - I'’M GONNA GO DO A DRIVE-BY. 476 00:16:20,631 --> 00:16:22,546 - THERE IS NO LIQUOR ON THIS CART. 477 00:16:22,546 --> 00:16:23,895 - WHO WOULD MAKE UP PLUM SURPRISE? 478 00:16:23,895 --> 00:16:26,942 [upbeat dance music] - NEW SONG. 479 00:16:26,942 --> 00:16:28,204 I THINK I CAN DANCE TO IT. 480 00:16:28,204 --> 00:16:29,771 - HA. YOU'’RE GONNA DANCE. - LOOK. 481 00:16:29,771 --> 00:16:31,425 JENNA HAS THE SAME IDEA. 482 00:16:31,425 --> 00:16:33,383 JUST REMEMBER, YOU'’RE NOT GONNA BE ALONE. 483 00:16:33,383 --> 00:16:34,950 YOU CAN DO THIS. 484 00:16:34,950 --> 00:16:39,650 - ♪ I DON'’T KNOW WHAT YOU'’RE WAITING FOR ♪ 485 00:16:39,650 --> 00:16:41,217 ♪ I WANNA SEE YOU PLAY 486 00:16:41,217 --> 00:16:42,784 ♪ COME ON AND MAKE MY DAY 487 00:16:42,784 --> 00:16:45,047 - I [bleep] LOVE ASIANS. 488 00:16:45,047 --> 00:16:46,570 - I WAS RIGHT. 489 00:16:46,570 --> 00:16:48,181 KRISTY DIDN'’T HAVE A DATE. 490 00:16:48,181 --> 00:16:49,356 SHE WASN'’T HAVING FUN. 491 00:16:49,356 --> 00:16:50,400 HER NIGHT WAS... 492 00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:52,141 ABOUT TO GET AWESOME. 493 00:16:52,141 --> 00:16:54,622 BRYAN JOHNSON WAS GONNA ASK HER TO DANCE. 494 00:16:54,622 --> 00:16:55,666 THEY'’D BUMP, GRIND, FALL IN LOVE, 495 00:16:55,666 --> 00:16:57,233 AND LIVE HAPPILY... 496 00:16:57,233 --> 00:16:59,801 NEVER AFTER. 497 00:16:59,801 --> 00:17:01,846 I WAS STILL LIVING IN THE HOUSE THAT GUILT BUILT, 498 00:17:01,846 --> 00:17:04,371 AND THERE WAS ONLY ONE WAY TO TEAR IT DOWN. 499 00:17:04,371 --> 00:17:07,069 ♪ 500 00:17:07,069 --> 00:17:08,244 - OH. 501 00:17:12,553 --> 00:17:13,771 - ♪ MIC CHECK, ONE TWO, ONE TWO ♪ 502 00:17:13,771 --> 00:17:15,904 - HEY, I'’LL FIND HER. KEEP MOVING. 503 00:17:15,904 --> 00:17:17,427 EYES ON THE PRIZE, OUT OF YOUR HEAD. 504 00:17:17,427 --> 00:17:18,776 - EYES ON THE PRIZE. 505 00:17:18,776 --> 00:17:20,648 - ♪ I GOTTA GET THIS PARTY STARTED ♪ 506 00:17:20,648 --> 00:17:21,997 ♪ I GOTTA GET THIS PARTY CRACKIN'’ ♪ 507 00:17:21,997 --> 00:17:23,520 ♪ I GOTTA BRING THAT BACK TO THE CLUB ♪ 508 00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:25,957 ♪ ALL RIGHT, NOW WATCH ME MAKE IT HAPPEN ♪ 509 00:17:25,957 --> 00:17:27,437 - WHERE'’S JENNA? I NEED YOU TO GET HER. 510 00:17:27,437 --> 00:17:29,004 - WHY? - I CAN'’T SAY. BRO CODE. 511 00:17:29,004 --> 00:17:31,267 - BRO CODE CAN SUCK IT. 512 00:17:31,267 --> 00:17:32,529 I'’M NOT GONNA HELP YOU UNLESS YOU TELL ME WHAT'’S GOING ON. 513 00:17:32,529 --> 00:17:34,096 - OKAY, FINE. 514 00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:37,099 MATTY'’S GONNA DANCE. 515 00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:41,364 [muffled dance music] 516 00:17:41,364 --> 00:17:42,452 - I JUST WANT TO SAY 517 00:17:42,452 --> 00:17:44,498 THESE DANCES ARE LAME. 518 00:17:44,498 --> 00:17:46,674 - OKAY. - I'’VE BEEN WHERE YOU ARE. 519 00:17:46,674 --> 00:17:48,676 AND I KNOW THAT THESE DUMB SCHOOL TRADITIONS 520 00:17:48,676 --> 00:17:51,635 CAN MAKE IT REALLY EASY FOR YOU TO FEEL UNLOVABLE. 521 00:17:51,635 --> 00:17:54,725 NOT THAT YOU ARE. THAT'’S NOT WHAT I MEANT. 522 00:17:54,725 --> 00:17:57,119 BUT I KNOW THAT YOU'’RE GOING INTO THE BATHROOM 523 00:17:57,119 --> 00:17:58,207 TO CRY RIGHT NOW. 524 00:17:58,207 --> 00:18:00,688 AND I WANT TO SAY, 525 00:18:00,688 --> 00:18:01,863 IT GETS BETTER, KRISTY. 526 00:18:01,863 --> 00:18:03,343 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 527 00:18:03,343 --> 00:18:04,909 - YOU DON'’T HAVE TO PRETEND. 528 00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:06,259 I KNOW YOU'’VE BEEN TOO DEPRESSED TO EAT. 529 00:18:06,259 --> 00:18:07,869 I SAW YOU THROW AWAY YOUR LUNCH. 530 00:18:07,869 --> 00:18:10,089 - YOU SAW THAT? 531 00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:13,788 THAT WASN'’T MY LUNCH. THAT WAS A DROP. 532 00:18:13,788 --> 00:18:17,008 [eerie music] 533 00:18:17,008 --> 00:18:19,315 - IT-- 534 00:18:19,315 --> 00:18:20,838 BUT YOU WERE JOURNALING ABOUT YOUR HEARTACHE ON THE QUAD. 535 00:18:20,838 --> 00:18:22,144 - I DON'’T HAVE A JOURNAL. 536 00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:24,668 [eerie music] 537 00:18:24,668 --> 00:18:27,018 - OKAY, WHAT ABOUT IN VAL'’S OFFICE? 538 00:18:27,018 --> 00:18:29,282 YOUR EYES WERE BLOODSHOT. 539 00:18:29,282 --> 00:18:30,413 - I WAS HIGH-BALLS, JENNA. 540 00:18:30,413 --> 00:18:34,156 [eerie music] 541 00:18:34,156 --> 00:18:36,332 LISTEN, I APPRECIATE YOUR CONCERN, 542 00:18:36,332 --> 00:18:37,725 BUT I'’M NOT HERE FOR THE MEMORIES. 543 00:18:37,725 --> 00:18:39,509 I CAME TO MAKE A TRANSACTION, 544 00:18:39,509 --> 00:18:42,251 AND HONESTLY, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU COULD REALLY USE SOMETHING 545 00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:43,731 TO TAKE THE EDGE OFF. 546 00:18:43,731 --> 00:18:45,080 HERE. 547 00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:46,603 THE FIRST ONE'’S FREE. 548 00:18:46,603 --> 00:18:48,953 - PUT YOUR HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM. 549 00:18:48,953 --> 00:18:50,477 - YOU'’RE A COP, DYLAN? 550 00:18:50,477 --> 00:18:52,043 - IT'’S LEONARD, AND I'’M D.E.A. 551 00:18:52,043 --> 00:18:54,263 YOU'’RE GOING DOWN. 552 00:18:54,263 --> 00:18:55,090 YOU'’RE FREE TO BOOGIE. 553 00:18:55,090 --> 00:18:57,048 - SUDDENLY, I WAS HIGH-- 554 00:18:57,048 --> 00:18:58,224 WITHOUT THE DRUGS. 555 00:18:58,224 --> 00:19:00,139 KRISTY WASN'’T SAD OR LONELY 556 00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:01,314 OR A HAVE-NOT, 557 00:19:01,314 --> 00:19:02,793 BECAUSE SHE WAS ABOUT TO HAVE-- 558 00:19:02,793 --> 00:19:04,099 A RECORD. 559 00:19:04,099 --> 00:19:05,448 - JENNA, COME. NOW. 560 00:19:05,448 --> 00:19:07,407 MATTY'’S GONNA DANCE. 561 00:19:11,802 --> 00:19:13,195 - ♪ BEFORE WE TOUCH 562 00:19:13,195 --> 00:19:14,501 - MORE FACES! 563 00:19:14,501 --> 00:19:15,676 - ♪ COME A LITTLE CLOSER 564 00:19:15,676 --> 00:19:18,940 - WOO-HOO-HOO-HOO! 565 00:19:18,940 --> 00:19:19,984 both: OH, MY GOD. 566 00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:21,638 - MATTY WAS DANCING, 567 00:19:21,638 --> 00:19:23,553 AND HE WASN'’T THE ONLY ONE. 568 00:19:23,553 --> 00:19:25,816 APPARENTLY, I DIDN'’T HAVE TO FEEL SORRY FOR ANYONE 569 00:19:25,816 --> 00:19:28,950 EXCEPT MYSELF, BECAUSE I WASN'’T ON THE DANCE FLOOR. 570 00:19:28,950 --> 00:19:30,343 - I TOLD MATTY YOU WERE UPSET HE DOESN'’T DANCE, 571 00:19:30,343 --> 00:19:32,519 BUT I DIDN'’T KNOW HE WAS GONNA BE SUCH A SPAZ-HOLE. 572 00:19:32,519 --> 00:19:33,824 I'’M SORRY I BROKE GIRL CODE. 573 00:19:33,824 --> 00:19:36,175 - I'’M NOT. 574 00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:39,874 - ♪ I WON'’T TREAT YOU LIKE YOU'’RE OH SO TYPICAL ♪ 575 00:19:39,874 --> 00:19:43,182 ♪ 576 00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,096 ♪ I WON'’T TREAT YOU LIKE YOU'’RE OH SO TYPICAL ♪ 577 00:19:45,096 --> 00:19:46,359 - I DON'’T WANT TO DO THIS. 578 00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:47,882 - COME ON, I DIDN'’T GET TO SEE ALL OF IT 579 00:19:47,882 --> 00:19:49,318 '’CAUSE I COULDN'’T GET PAST YOUR POSSE. 580 00:19:49,318 --> 00:19:51,102 - WHAT CAN I SAY? THE LADIES LOVE MY MOVES. 581 00:19:51,102 --> 00:19:53,757 - SO LET'’S SEE SOME. 582 00:19:53,757 --> 00:19:55,933 - OKAY. [clears throat] 583 00:19:55,933 --> 00:19:57,892 HIT IT. 584 00:19:57,892 --> 00:19:59,546 - ♪JUST ALL PHYSICAL ♪ 585 00:19:59,546 --> 00:20:03,463 ♪ I'’M THE TYPE WHO WON'’T GET OH SO CRITICAL ♪ 586 00:20:03,463 --> 00:20:07,641 ♪ SO LET'’S MAKE THINGS PHYSICAL ♪ 587 00:20:07,641 --> 00:20:09,382 - COME ON, J-TOWN, DON'’T LEAVE ME HANGING AGAIN! 588 00:20:09,382 --> 00:20:11,210 - [laughing] 589 00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:13,647 - ♪ I WANT YOU CLOSE, I WANT YOU ♪ 590 00:20:13,647 --> 00:20:17,433 ♪ I WON'’T TREAT YOU LIKE YOU'’RE TYPICAL ♪ 591 00:20:17,433 --> 00:20:19,000 ♪ I WANT YOU CLOSE 592 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,916 ♪ I WANT YOU 593 00:20:26,268 --> 00:20:27,443 - NEXT ON AWKWARD... I HAVE TO GO READ 594 00:20:27,443 --> 00:20:28,531 AT THE STUPID COFFEE HOUSE TONIGHT. 595 00:20:28,531 --> 00:20:30,272 - SHE'’S GOT A PERFORMANCE TONIGHT, 596 00:20:30,272 --> 00:20:31,621 WHICH SHE IS NOW SHUTTING ME OUT OF. 597 00:20:31,621 --> 00:20:32,883 - MY NAME IS JENNA. 598 00:20:32,883 --> 00:20:34,972 THIS IS THE STORY OF HOW I LOST MY VIRGINITY. 599 00:20:34,972 --> 00:20:35,973 - I'’LL BE IN THE CAR. 600 00:20:35,973 --> 00:20:37,061 - YOU WERE CLASSIC. 601 00:20:37,061 --> 00:20:38,454 - WHY'’D YOU COME TONIGHT? 602 00:20:38,454 --> 00:20:40,630 [cell phone vibrates] - HOLD ON A SEC. 603 00:20:40,630 --> 00:20:42,066 - SO WHO IS THE GUY YOU STAYED WITH? 604 00:20:42,066 --> 00:20:44,504 - COLLIN? HE'’S IN MY CLASS. 42959

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