All language subtitles for Drop Dead Diva (2009) - S05E04 - Cheaters (1080p AMZN WEB-DL x265 Celdra)_track3_[eng]

See that aspiring
model there?

That was me, Deb,
until the day I died.

I thought I'd go
straight to heaven,

but there was
a bit of a mix-up.

And I woke up
in someone else's body.

So now, I'm Jane,

a super-busy lawyer
with my very own assistant.

I got a new life,
a new wardrobe,

and the only people
who really know
what's going on with me

are my girlfriend, Stacy
and my guardian angel, Paul.

I used to think everything
happened for a reason.

Whoo!

Now, I sure hope I was right.

* La, la, la, la-la-la-la

* La, la-la, la

Stacy in the house.

Are you okay?

I just mean
that you're
in the house.

Since you sold the pakery,
I thought you'd be home more.

Oh. I've been busy.

Busy with what?

Things...

That people do.

Okay.

Where are you
when you do these things?

Places...

Where people go.

Stace,
what's going on?

Ladies, can you
keep it down, please?

Sorry, Paul.

No, no. Do not
whisper for him.

Paul,
you are a guest!

Yeah, I know.
That's why I stopped
using your toothbrush.

And...

I started
wearing underwear.
Oh.

What else do you
want from me?

Oh, God.

It's 8:30.
I should've been
out of here at 8:24.

Now that
Owen's your boss,
you can't be late?

No, no.

I have figured out a way
to work with my ex-fiance.

Avoidance?

You bet.
Mmm.

See, he gets to the firm
at 9:15, so I arrive at 9:10.

And then I hide out
in my office till 9:20,

when he goes
into his office.

And I can pretty much
roam freely till 11:00,
when he comes out for a snack.

I wonder
if Courteney Cox
has to do this

when she works
with David Arquette.

Now it's 8:31.

Stacy, have a good day,
whatever it is you're doing.

Oh, hang on.
Jane, I'm coming with.

No, you're not.
Yes, I am.

Don't worry.
I got clothes in the car.

Okay. All right.

Now, listen. You can't
just hang out at my office.
This is a place of business.

You let your other
guardian angels up here.

But they were
working here.

You don't see Owen,
do you?

No.
Okay.

Look, Jane,
just give me a job.
I'll do anything.

I have tremendous
upper-body strength.

No. Stop.

It's Owen.

Um, um, move. Move!

Kim!

My dry cleaning.
I need a 24-hour turnaround.

Tell Nicole.
She's your new assistant.

Welcome.
I like the place
on the corner.

There's a coupon
in my desk.

And, uh,
my car needs a wash.

Sorry, but I don't do
personal errands.

Excuse me?

Well, Owen brought me
from the courthouse

to deal with
client-related business

motions,
pleadings, research.

You're serious.

Then, you're fired.

Go steal
some office supplies.
I won't tell.

Owen never
gets coffee this early.

He must've had
a late night.

Jane, about that job,

I got skills.
I can juggle.

I can speak Latin
well, pig Latin.

I can do impressions.
I mean, I can learn.

You want a job?
Follow Stacy and find out
what she's been doing all day.

You want me to spy
on your best friend?

Oh, my God, you're right.
That's a terrible idea.

It's an awesome idea.
I can be a spy.

Okay. I got
to make a run for it.

Jane.
Oh! Geez. Owen!

What... What a surprise.

You've been avoiding me.

What? No. No.
Come on.

Stop. Please.

Kim is concerned
that we can't
work together.

Well, did you tell her
that we are professionals?

I did, which is why
I'm your new co-counsel
on your Jenson pro bono.

Great.

That's great.

My SAT scores
got red-flagged
by the Testing Service.

They said his scores went up
too much after his first try.

If scores increase
more than 350 points,

it triggers an automatic
investigation for cheating.

I studied every
waking minute,

except when I was
in school or running track.

He runs track
for the Santa Monica
track club.

It's a world-class team.

She's a very proud mom.

Four years ago,
the principal
at Elmcrest Prep

handpicked my son
for their outreach program.

And now he's the first one
in our family
to go to college,

and with
a full scholarship.

If you get
my scores reinstated.

It says here you got
a 1650 the first time
and then a 2050?

Yeah. I need an 1800
for the scholarship.

Nick, a formal investigation
takes three months.

And I know it's a pain,
but why not just take
the test again?

The next test date
isn't for another month.

I need to send my scores
in to Tufts by next week.

These cases can be
very difficult to expedite.

There are strict protocols.
You should know that...

We will get right on it.

We'll start by invoking
the arbitration clause,

and I'll see
if your principal will
testify on your behalf.

Thank you.
No problem.

Never cut me off again.

Sorry. It's just...

You were being
a bit negative,

and I like to give
my clients more hope.

I was trying
to give the kid a way out.

A way out of what?

He's under a lot of pressure.

Just because he says
he didn't cheat doesn't
mean he didn't cheat.

Sorry. He just doesn't
look like a cheater to me.

In my experience,
the people who appear
least likely to cheat

are the ones
you got to watch out for.

Are we done?

Yeah, we're done.

Our boy, Billy has been
accused of forcing himself
on the neighbors' girl.

Oh, my God.
Billy's been
accused of rape?

And they're claiming
that he got her pregnant.

Is he in custody?

No, Belinda
took him out to pee.

So,
the neighbors' girl is...

Stella, a Maltese.
Ah.

Charles and Pesha Van Horn
claim that Billy trespassed
in their lawn and defiled her.

Even if your neighbors'
allegations are true,

they can't be asking
for that much.

$250,000.

That's insane.

No one
in the neighborhood
can stand them.

They can't even
stand each other.

Charles is a lawyer
that loves to sue.

He sued the neighbors
across the street,

claiming that their two-story
birdhouse was an eyesore.

It is,
but who sues over that?

And now,
he's turning on us.

Today's arbitration
is to determine
whether the Testing Service

may withhold Nick Jenson's
test scores,

subject to
a cheating investigation.

We understand
their protocols,

but Nick's scores improved
because he studied.

And Principal Daly
will attest to that.

90% of my students
who retake the test
show significant increases.

400 points without cheating?
Almost impossible.

"Almost impossible"
by definition
means still possible.

Since Principal Daly
took over at Elmcrest,

they have become
one of the largest
feeders in the state

to Ivy League schools,

and they offer
their students

a comprehensive SAT
prep class.

And, Principal Daly,
do you believe
that prep class

could explain
a 400 point jump?

Absolutely.

Nick's first score
was a 1650.

That's correct.

Did you not prepare him
the first time around?

At that time, Nick
was intensely training
with his track team.

He lacked focus.

This is the answer sheet
from Nick's first attempt.

In our experience,
if he had "lacked focus,"

he would've
answered randomly.

But our analysis shows
his answers weren't arbitrary.

So, maybe the 1650
is a genuine reflection
of his abilities?

Our outreach students
have less experience
with standardized tests.

After Nick's first attempt,
he dedicated himself
to the SAT prep work,

which explains
his dramatic improvement.

Okay, then.

Unless either party
has additional evidence
to introduce...

Oh. We just ask
that you render
your decision quickly.

You'll have it
by the end of the day.

Great. Thank you.

There's no way Billy
could've gotten
into the Van Horns' yard.

There's a six-foot-high
fence and a locked gate
that separates our properties.

Billy's a large dog.
Could he have jumped?

No. Billy has hip dysplasia.
He's physically disabled.

No further questions.

Mr. Van Horn.

I'd like to enter
into evidence

this home-surveillance
video.

Can you identify
the dog defiling Stella?

Uh, your honor,
this is a bit
of an unfair surprise.

May I have a moment
to consult with my client?

You may not.

The witness
will answer the question.

Yes, that's our Billy.

I'm afraid to tell Jane.

I'm not sure
how she'll react.

You can't be afraid
of your friend.

I know, but she
might not understand.

Her opinion shouldn't
affect your life choices.

You know what?
You're right.
You're the best.

Leslie!

I feel like I've known you
my entire life.

I'm here for you
no matter what.

Mmm.

To the future.

To the future.

Kim.
Shh!

Why are you spying
on your assistant?

Well, I fired her.

But Owen rehired her.

See, you can't use her
for personal errands.

The firm's HR
manual prohibits it.

You've read
the firm's HR manual?

Of course.
Haven't you?

Yes.

Now, please tell me
you found a way to get
our dog out of the doghouse.

Not after that
X-rated video.

I think we need
to focus on damages.

No. The Morts have
been loyal to this firm.

We'll never keep
their business if we lose.

Hello? Grayson?

Yeah.

Okay. I'm gonna
need you to focus.

Attractive nuisance.

You're calling Jane
an attractive nuisance?

Yes.

No.

The tort
of attractive nuisance...

When you're drawn
to something
that's dangerous,

like a kid
to a swimming pool.

We can argue that
Billy isn't responsible
for his actions

because Stella,
a dog in heat,
constitutes...

An attractive nuisance.

Why not?

Get right on that.

Jane! I know
what she's doing
behind your back.

Check these out.

Her name's Leslie.

She's prompt,
a good listener,

and she drinks
chai lattes with agave.

Oh, my God.

I know. What's wrong
with a little white sugar?

No, Paul.

Stacy and I
drink chai lattes
with agave at that cafe.

I mean...
I mean, we used to.

God. Do you get
what this means?

Uh, they're thirsty?

It means that I have not
been there for her,

and she found
a new best friend.

That's crazy.

You think?

No, it makes sense.
They've been inseparable.

After the cafe,
they went to the park,

and then Leslie
came back to your place,
and they talked for hours.

No. You know what?

I have been so obsessed
with my wedding
and my breakup

that I have not
been there for her.

And she stood by me
through everything
that I have been through,

including my home
waxing disaster.

God, I'm a terrible friend.
I have to fix this.

Oh, wait.
Should I keep
spying on Stacy?

I'll take that as a yes!

Teri, send Stacy flowers
tulips, her favorite

and write on the card,
"To a wonderful friend."

You never send me flowers,
and I am a wonderful friend
and an assistant.

You know what? You're right.
Send yourself flowers.

How thoughtful.
Where are you going?

My office.

The Jensons
are in the conference room.

Owen is on the phone
with the arbitrator,
and the verdict is in.

Ooh, that was fast.
Um, you know what?

I don't really want flowers.
I... I want chocolate.

Great. Okay.
Yeah. Send yourself
some chocolate.

Oh, wait. Um,
but what should
I write on the card?

I'm very sorry.

I spoke
with the arbitrator,

who sided
with the Testing Service.

They'll have three months
for their investigation.

No.

We can appeal.
We will not give up.

There's something else.

I called Principal Daly
to tell her
about the decision.

She says you took
a drug test
through the track team?

Yeah,
at the meet last week.
I peed in a cup.

You failed the test.

Nick?
It's impossible.
I don't do drugs.

They found amphetamines.

And since Elmcrest
has a zero-tolerance policy,
you've been expelled.

Boss, police.

I'm going to jail?

Marlena Jenson?
Yes?

You are under arrest
for criminal sale
of a controlled substance.

What?
What?

Mom?

Okay, okay.
Do not say a word.

We will meet you
at the station.

The DA believes
that you gave
your son drugs,

which, under the law,
constitutes a sale.

That's ridiculous.

His urine test revealed
a banned Schedule II
substance, Adderall.

Adderall?
I take Adderall.

My doctor prescribed it
for my ADHD

We know. The DA spoke
to your insurance carrier.

Adderall is a known
academic steroid,
since it helps with focus.

Now, the DA's theory
is that you gave
the pills to Nick

to help him focus
on the SAT

I would never do that.

Marlena, where do you
keep your Adderall?

In my medicine cabinet.

Is it possible
that Nick could have
taken them himself?

Attractive nuisance?
That's an insult to Stella.

Your honor,
California code
30954 states

that it is unlawful
to permit any female dog

to run at large
when the dog is in heat.

De facto
attractive nuisance,
your honor.

That's preposterous.
The code violation
doesn't sound in tort law.

I agree.

Clever argument,
but the plaintiff is right.

Unless you have
something else to argue,

we're moving on
to damages tomorrow.

Yes, I took Adderall.
I'm sorry I didn't tell you.

Because you knew
it was cheating.
No.

A buddy in my SAT
prep group told me
about the smarties.

It wasn't like I took them
to get high or anything.

Okay, Nick. Did you take
the pills from your mom?

No. I swear.

Then where did
you get them?
I don't know.

What do you mean,
you don't know?

I can show you
how I got them.

You go to this
t-shirt website.

Then you go
to the order page.

Under quantity,
you type in
your locker number.

I'll type in my friend's,
since I'm expelled.

Then you put in
your PayPal account,

and your credit card
gets charged 10 bucks
to Awesome Ts.

The next day,
you open your locker,

and you find an envelope
with two beans.

I am amazed.

So, you'll show this
to the cops,

and they'll release
my mom, right?

Well, we can't go
to the police

till we can verify
what you told us.

And I know
how to do just that.

You want me to pretend
to be his mother?

Step-mother.

Dad is 80,
you're his hot
trophy wife,

and Paul is your step-son
who wants to go
to Elmcrest Prep.

We are setting up
a sting to find out
who's selling drugs.

Like 21 Jump Street.
I'm Channing Tatum,

though there is something
special about Jonah Hill.

Great.
You're going on a tour
later this afternoon.

When you pass locker 781,
hide this camera
across from it.

I will stream it
to my laptop.

Okay, Paul,
if you don't mind,
can I speak to Stacy?

Sure.

Alone.

Ah.

Sweetie...

Um...

I just want
to say thank you
for doing this for me.

Of course.
No problem.

And I know that lately
I have been
all about me, me, me,

and I haven't been there
for you, you, you,

but I'm here now.

And you are
my best friend.

Thank you.

Okay, look. I just...

I get a sense
that there's something
you're not telling me.

Are you upset?

We've never had secrets.

Jane, I'm not ready
to have this conversation.

So there is a conversation.
See? I knew it.

Look, we will talk
about this later, okay?

Right now I need
to get into character.

Elmcrest Prep's
computer facilities
are state-of-the-art.

Yes?
How's your
cheerleading squad?

Your son's interested
in cheerleading?

Uh, I'm a tumbler
with a booming voice.

I'd be crazy
not to use my talents.

Our squad is top-notch,
and we'd be crazy
not to sign you up.

Do you have students
from same-sex parents?

We welcome students
from all types of families.

Diversity's important
at Elmcrest.

Oh, good. Paul comes
from a diverse family.

I'm young, and my husband
is very, very old.

Let me show you
the science lab.

Okay.

How goes your
sting operation?

About an hour ago,
two kids were making out.

It got so steamy,
I swear to God,
I had to turn away.

Are you
keeping me company?

My case, too.

So, how do you like
being a lawyer again?

I'm sure you don't miss
those judges' robes.

You always said
that they were itchy.

I'm really trying
to get up to speed

on the firm's
operating procedures,

so,
if you don't mind...
Sorry.

Okay.

I will be quiet.

Promise.

Hey, Owen.
Jane!

No, something
is actually happening.

Oh, sorry.

Sorry.
It's just the janitor.

Sorry.

Oh, my God, Owen.
It's the janitor.

Proof positive
that Nick Jenson

didn't get the Adderall
from his mother.

And this envelope
was recovered
from the locker.

We demand
that the DA release
Miss Jenson from custody.

Who's selling the drugs?
Who's the blurred-out guy?

We're not revealing
that information
at this time.

Then I'll charge
the two of you
with obstruction of justice.

Owen.

Before you
charge an ex-judge
with obstruction,

you might want to run it
by your boss first.

I expect to see
Marlena Jenson freed,

the charges dismissed
immediately.

Thank you.

While I admit
your scare tactics
were masterful,

why are you
protecting the janitor?

Our first responsibility
is to our client.

I'm well aware.

Well, it would be a shame
if we gave up that footage

and didn't use it
to our advantage.

What advantage?

The principal expelled Nick.
We need to get him readmitted.

That footage
is our ace in the hole.

Hey.
Jane's not home.

I know.
I came to see you.

Me?

If you need undercover work
on a legal case,

I'm gonna have
to start charging.

I need your advice.

Stacy, I'm...

I'm in love with Jane.

Hold up.

I can't talk
with you about her.
It's not right.

You have to tell me
if I have a chance.

If it's all in my head,
I need to know,

and I'll try to move on.

Go talk to her.
Tell her how you feel.

I've tried.
She pushes me away.

She barely even
talks to me at work.
I...

Here's all
I can say to you.

Jane pictured
a life with Owen.

And if you want
to win her over,

maybe she needs
to see a life with you.

That's what
I needed to hear.

Wait. I didn't
really say anything.

Thank you, Stacy.
Thank you.

'Kay.

Well,
you are absolutely right.

This is an outrage.
I will terminate
the janitor immediately.

We're here
because we want you
to re-admit Nick,

wipe his record clean.

Absolutely not.

I have a zero-tolerance
drug policy.

Really?
I mean, drugs seem
pretty tolerated to me.

Nick did get the Adderall
on your campus,
from your janitor.

And we have evidence
that the janitor's
operation is widespread.

Nick is a terrific kid,
but none of that matters.

In my school,
you get caught
with drugs, you're out.

Well, thank you
for your time.
Yeah.

We're gonna
just run this over
to the evening news.

Oh.

I can see
you like the press.

Mmm. Good idea.

Prep school, rich kids,
janitor dealing Adderall

they'll eat
that scandal right up.

My students
really don't need
that distraction. Please.

Re-admit Nick.
No expulsion, no scandal.

You have a deal.

Stella's $250,000 valuation
is not unreasonable.

She comes from a long line
of AKC champions.

She's a champion herself.
Best of breed, best of show.

She was a shoo-in
for Westminster.

So much so, we were contacted
by a dog-food company
for an endorsement.

$250,000?

No Maltese has ever sold
for that amount
of money, correct?

Well, not yet.

But prior to her pregnancy,
I placed an ad
in the Pedigree Report

putting Stella up for sale
at that price.

You were going
to sell Stella?

Before the incident, yes.
She was at her prime.

Did you get
any interest?

No. The ad
was only up for a week.

No one's gonna want
to buy her in this condition.

Oh, good.
Teri, I need your help.

What can I do for you?

But first,
how's it going with Owen?

He hates me.

He doesn't hate you.
Why would he come
to work here?

To make my life hell.

Look, Teri,
I just haven't
told you something.

Oh. Is it that
when you work really late,

you lock your office door
and take off your bra?

No! Oh, my God!

I kissed Grayson right before
I was supposed to marry Owen.

I know. I figured it out.

Grayson comes in
to check on you,

and then Owen passes out
bam wedding called off.

Let's be honest.

You've been mooning
over Grayson ever since
he came to work here.

I'm horrible.

Who isn't?

Now, what can I do for you?

Awesome Ts website...
I'm confused.

How did the janitor
set up this website?

You think he had help?

There are a bunch
of genius kids
at this school.

So I wonder,
was the janitor the brains
or was he just the mule?

I'm on it.

Oh, thanks for letting me
tell you about Grayson.

And thank you
for the amazing box
of imported chocolates

that cost twice as much
as Stacy's flowers.

Mr. Dumont,
as an AKC
registered judge,

in your opinion,
is Stella worth
$250,000?

I'd like to see
her walk, please.

Come closer.

That dog
was never worth $250,000.

And why is that?

The Maltese is known
for its long and silky hair.

Stella has a slight frizz.

She has a bit
of tear-staining,
perhaps from distichiasis.

I also detect
a very slight harelip.

So you're saying Stella
wouldn't win Westminster?

That's correct.
Don't get me wrong.

The dog is high-caliber,
but she's not a champion.

Thank you.

When was the last time you
judged a national competition?

About three years ago.

Did you have an affair
with Maria Frankel,
the owner of the Bichon Frise

who won that competition
three years ago.

Objection.
That has nothing to do

with the witness's ability
to evaluate a dog's worth.

Your honor, I'd like
to rephrase the question.

Go ahead.

You believed
Miss Frankel's bichon
was a national champion?

That's right.

And since the dog
won that competition
three years ago,

has it even placed
in another competition?

No.

No further questions.

Sleeping with
a contestant's owner?

How could you
not tell us that?

I didn't think
it was relevant.

You lost all credibility
on the stand.

I'm sorry.

Let's go.

She's fat.

I'm pregnant!
So not cool, buddy.

Not you.

Stella.

She's too big for a Maltese
that's three weeks' pregnant.

Well, the father
was a large dog.

That doesn't explain
her oddly proportioned
weight gain.

I didn't notice it
from the other angle,

but I'd take a look
at her medical records.

Maybe she's being treated
for a thyroid condition
or something glandular.

Which would
decrease her value

on the open market
prior to getting pregnant.

I'll subpoena her
vet records and meet you
back at the office.

Thank you.

Jane.

Oh, what now?
Did Stacy unfriend me
on Facebook?

No. I think I've reached
a very interesting
conclusion about Stacy.

Take a look
at these pictures.
Yeah, I've seen them already.

Well, this time,
look closely.

Stacy and Leslie
are always touching.

Women are not
uptight like men.
We touch.

If you're implying
that Stacy and Leslie

are romantically involved,
you're way off.

Yesterday at school,
Stacy asked the principal

if they accept students
from same-sex families,

which is totally
out of character

because she
was married to my dad.

And not to play
into stereotypes,

but Leslie drives a Subaru
and she's a vegan.

And when was the last time
Stacy was on a date
with a dude?

Look, I would know
if my best friend
was a lesbian.

Oh, my God!
My best friend
is a lesbian!

This is wonderful news!

See? She doesn't hate me.

She just needed time
to come out to me.

I'm gonna be
the most supportive
friend ever.

Jane, in your office, now.

Thank you, Paul.

Hey, Paul?

I've been watching you,
and I have a proposition.

Well, I'm on a roll,
so bring it on, sister.

I don't play like that.

Sorry.
What can I do for you?

I just saw your memo.
You're arguing that taking
Adderall is not cheating?

According
to their guidelines,

Adderall is not
a banned substance.

Nick took it illegally.
That's cheating.

It's kind of
a gray area.

Maybe it's not copying
off a friend,

but it did give a Nick
an unfair advantage.

He still used
his own brainpower.

He's a kid, you know?

Maybe he just got
caught up in the moment.

If someone
has a moral center, Jane,

they don't just get
caught up in the moment.

Oh, is this a bad time?

'Cause I have some info
on the janitor.

He's left the country.

He just got fired,
and he's already gone?

He doesn't seem
like a bad guy.

He's a churchgoer,
no record.

He volunteers
for Meals On Wheels.

He's the last guy
you'd expect to sell drugs.

Maybe he needed
the money.

Well, the website
only sells Adderall,

and the buyers
are only students
at Elmcrest.

Check this out.

This is Awesome Ts
web traffic over
the past 12 months.

Here, lots of Adderall sales.

And here,
the site's not even active.

Turns out the site's
only operational

the week
before standardized tests.

The SATs, the ACTs,
and the APs.

And who at this school
would have the most to gain
from high test scores?

The same person who would want
the janitor to disappear
so he couldn't point a finger.

Principal Daly
is the drug dealer.

No thyroid problems,
no Graves' disease.

Despite the dog expert,
Stella's poundage
is pure pregnancy.

And for the record,
so is mine.

Can I see that?

Sure.

Hmm.

Yep. Nothing unusual
about her medical history.

The vet bills
are paid for by CVH trust.

And here again,
CVH trust.

Why would a trust be paying
for a doggy checkup?

Maybe the trust
owns the dog?

CVH.

Charles Van Horn.

He owned the dog
outside of his marriage.

Where are Stella's
pedigree papers?

We got to get
back to court.

Hi!

Hi. Is this
an okay time?

Oh, yeah, of course.

I'm just prepping
for a hearing to reinstate
my client's scores.

But none of that
even matters!

Just...
Okay, come here.

Sit down.
Okay.

So...

I know what's going on,

and I support you,
and I love you.

You do?

Yes.
And I'm super-excited.

I'm just glad
you figured it out now

and didn't wait
until you were,
like, 50.

Oh,
I couldn't do it then.

I mean, unless
I froze my eggs.

Why would you
have to freeze your eggs
just 'cause you're a lesbian?

A lesbian?

Isn't that what
we're talking about?

Oh, no.
Jane, I'm not gay.

I mean, we once kissed
in high school,

but that was
just for practice.
That was just for practice.

Okay, so, look.

I have some big news.

Huge, actually.

I want to be a mom.

I want to get pregnant
and have a baby.

A baby?

Stacy!

A baby?

Yes. I have given it
so much thought.

I can give you
all the reasons
it makes sense

and all the reasons
it doesn't,
but we can do that later.

Right now,
I just want
your support.

Yes. Of course. Yes.

You always
have my support.

But wait a minute.
If you're not a lesbian,
then who's Leslie?

Leslie?
Yeah.

Oh, um, she's
my friend from yoga.

She is a lesbian.

She has two kids through
artificial insemination,

and she's been
my sounding board.

Got it. Wow.

I know.

Come here.

Mmm. You're gonna be
an awesome mom.

I hope so.

Mrs. Van Horn,
since Billy can't jump,

we asked ourselves,
how the heck did he
get into your backyard?

Any thoughts?

I have no idea.

We wondered,
who would benefit
from Stella's pregnancy?

And then we learned
that a trust places Stella

outside
of community property,

which means that if Charles
wanted to sell Stella,
you couldn't stop him.

Isn't that right?
Objection.

Overruled.

No, I... I can't stop Charles
from selling Stella.

You love her.

Yes.

Did you want
Charles to sell Stella?

Please answer
the question.

No. I didn't want him
to sell Stella.

But Charles
placed the ad anyway.

And so when Stella
went into heat,

you opened the gate
to the backyard
and let Billy in.

Isn't that right?
Objection! Conjecture.

It's true. I did.
I opened the gate.

Because I knew
if she got pregnant

that he couldn't
sell my baby.

I'm so sorry.
I never thought
he would sue you.

And it looks
like we're done here.

Not yet.

Please inform my wife
that the dog is my property,

and she'll have
to turn it over to me, now.

No. Please, Charles.

I'm afraid he's correct.

Your honor, if I may?

Mrs. Van Horn,
have you ever
bought Stella anything

using money
from a personal account?

Yes, of course. Um...

Grooming and toys...

Uh, a poncho.

Well, Charles,
as a lawyer,

you know
that those purchases
constitute commingling,

and a commingled asset
is a marital asset,

which means
that Stella is now
owned by both of you.

Hold on.
No.

No reason to hold on
to anything.

Ms. Kaswell is correct.

Nice job.

Fine!

Keep the damn dog.
She's damaged goods.

Thank you so much.

Would you be interested
in representing me
in my divorce?

Oh, I'd be delighted.

Miss Bingum,
I'm unclear why
I'm reading the results

of your client's
drug test.

The Testing Service
claimed increased studying

was not enough
to boost Nick's scores,
and they were right.

Nick did have help...
Adderall.

So he used drugs
to get a higher score?

That's not helping
your argument.

Adderall is not
a listed banned substance,

so technically
it's not cheating.

Well, we disagree.

Sorry I'm late.

I was at the DA's office.

Principal Daly
has just been arrested

for the illegal sale
of Adderall.

I have here
a list of 49
Elmcrest Prep students

who purchased the drug
through a website
that she ran.

Wait. She was
selling the drugs?

To boost
her students' test scores

to elevate her stature
in the scholastic community.

I applaud you
for exposing this,

but what
is the Testing Service
supposed to do?

We would like you to release
Nick's scores immediately.

We won't condone
academic juicing.

Fine. If you
disqualify Nick's scores,

then you have to disqualify
the 48 other students.

I agree.

Wait. Excuse me.

But did all the students
on that list increase
their SAT scores?

Yes, by an average of 21%.

And with normal prep,
no drugs,

how much does the average
student's score increase?

We estimate 10%. Why?

10% of 1650,
my first test score,

is 165.

Adding that amount
to my first score,

I'd have an 1815.

Which gets you
the scholarship.

We will drop the appeal
if you apply the 10% cap,
which discounts...

Which discounts
the effects
of the drug use.

I think that's
a reasonable resolution
given the situation.

Okay. Fine.

Nick clearly knows his math.
We can't argue with that.

I think we're done here.

Is this my dry cleaning?

Yes, it is.

I appreciate
you coming around.

Yeah, I told you
I don't do personal errands.

Paul?

From now on,
whenever you need
a new shade of lipstick

or your shoes repaired,
Paul is your man.

Your car is washed.
Here's your keys.

And nice ride,
may I add.

Yeah.
Those aren't my keys.

I'll be right back.

Aw. Bingum and French.

Looks like you two
can work together.

Oh, we got the job done.

Good.
Let's keep it going,

next time
for a paying client, hmm?

We did do good work.

I guess that's something.

I guess it is.

Are you looking
for something else?

I...

What is it, Jane?

I just wish that you
would forgive me.

Of course you do.

Then you'd be free...
No guilt.

You could go on
with your life.

But I would still
feel like crap.

What can I do?

What can I do
to make this better?

Tell me this

when you kissed Grayson,
was it "in the moment,"

or did you have feelings
for him the whole time
we were together?

Forget it.

I don't want to know.

Paul.
I appreciate your help.

You're welcome.
But you cannot keep
hanging out here.

Au contraire.

I am the new H&P intern.
Nicole arranged it.

The firm's budget's
been cut to the bone,

and by law,
interns must be paid.

Or get college credit.

I just signed up
for an online degree.

I'm gonna be
a professional spy.

I'm hoping
to uncover more lesbians
once I get my degree.

But first, I have
to find Kim's keys.

Good luck with that.

Grayson.

Stacy let me in.
I hope you don't mind.

Oh, my God.

This is amazing.

It's for you.

Jane...
No, wait. Stop.

I need you to stop.

I love the way you laugh.

No, Grayson,
please don't.

I love how
you always surprise me.

I love the way you roll
your eyes at Kim.

I love how you
know obscure laws

and Justin Timberlake's
middle name.

But I love
the way your mind works.

I see my life with you.

A family...

Kids, Christmas.

You know how
I'm so certain?

Because I can't see
my life without you.

Less than a month ago,
I was engaged to Owen.

I can't do this.
I just can't do this.

You know what? You just...
You deserve someone
better than me.

No. When we kissed,
I knew we were
meant to be together.

Tell me you don't
feel the same way.

That kiss...

I was just
in the moment.

You know,
we were both
just in the moment.

And this is...
This... God.

This is beautiful.

But I can't.

And you should...
You should go.

Look me in the eye
and tell me
this isn't real.

I need you to go.

* It's everything you wanted

* It's everything you don't

* It's one door swinging open

* And one door swinging closed

* Some prayers find an answer

* Some prayers never know

* We're holding on

* And letting go