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1
00:00:03,879 --> 00:00:06,089
(sighs)
2
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,346
Mom?
3
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:14,598
Adam?
4
00:00:14,598 --> 00:00:16,058
(sighs)
5
00:00:16,058 --> 00:00:17,935
Yes.
6
00:00:17,935 --> 00:00:21,563
I said I didn't want to
go, and you made me go.
7
00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:22,648
No.
8
00:00:22,648 --> 00:00:24,191
Then you sat there like a lump.
9
00:00:24,191 --> 00:00:26,276
I finally find a couple
we can be couple friends with,
10
00:00:26,276 --> 00:00:28,278
and you consciously
uncoupled us.
11
00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:31,698
The guy called soccer
"football." He's from Milwaukee.
12
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:35,077
There's no excuse for that.
13
00:00:35,077 --> 00:00:37,913
Why are you so hung up
on having couple friends?
14
00:00:37,913 --> 00:00:39,414
It's what you do
when you get married.
15
00:00:39,414 --> 00:00:41,166
You cultivate relationships
with other couples.
16
00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:42,918
You go to movies together,
you meet for sushi,
17
00:00:42,918 --> 00:00:44,294
you stay at their beach house.
18
00:00:44,294 --> 00:00:45,712
They had a beach house.
19
00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:50,175
Really? Do they have
any kids my age?
20
00:00:50,175 --> 00:00:52,094
Don't bother. He killed it.
21
00:00:52,094 --> 00:00:55,264
And not the good kind of "killed
it" like you young people say.
22
00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:57,766
Fine, if it'll make you happy,
I'll have another brutal dinner
23
00:00:57,766 --> 00:01:00,769
with a couple of hipsters you
met at the Artichoke Festival.
24
00:01:00,769 --> 00:01:03,772
Are you kidding? 'Cause when
I said we should do this again,
25
00:01:03,772 --> 00:01:05,232
their voices jumped
three octaves.
26
00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:07,776
(high-pitched):
"Yeah, absolutely!"
27
00:01:08,944 --> 00:01:10,612
Well, if you're looking
for a fun hang,
28
00:01:10,612 --> 00:01:12,114
I'll go out with you guys.
29
00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:17,452
BOTH (high-pitched):
Yeah, absolutely.
30
00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:41,518
It's just, I've waited
so long to get married,
31
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:42,728
I want the whole
married package,
32
00:01:42,728 --> 00:01:44,688
and that package
includes couple friends.
33
00:01:44,688 --> 00:01:47,107
You know, the kind
you go on bicycle trips with.
34
00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:48,317
Adam's in a wheelchair.
35
00:01:48,317 --> 00:01:50,736
Or take wine-tasting classes.
You're an alcoholic.
36
00:01:50,736 --> 00:01:54,614
Or help you bury relentlessly
negative friends in the desert.
37
00:01:54,614 --> 00:01:57,784
She's taking a shot at you.
I don't know if you caught it.
38
00:01:57,784 --> 00:02:00,454
(scoffs)
Like those idiots could bury me.
39
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:05,292
Well, couple friends are great
until two of you stay behind
40
00:02:05,292 --> 00:02:07,461
in the lodge while
your spouses go skiing,
41
00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:09,296
and next thing you know,
your husband's asking you
42
00:02:09,296 --> 00:02:12,799
how you got rug burns on
your knees playing Scrabble.
43
00:02:14,343 --> 00:02:18,472
Well, you just got
a lot more interesting.
44
00:02:18,472 --> 00:02:19,639
Um, hello?
45
00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:21,141
Hi.
46
00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:22,309
Not you.
47
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:25,312
What about me and Andy?
48
00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:27,272
Interesting pitch.
Bring it home.
49
00:02:27,272 --> 00:02:29,816
Well, I do believe
I am the only other one
50
00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:31,443
at this table who's coupled up.
51
00:02:31,443 --> 00:02:33,570
Some of us are just
a little pickier.
52
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:35,238
Maybe a little too picky.
53
00:02:35,238 --> 00:02:36,990
For the last time,
I'm not gonna date
54
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:39,659
any of your widowed
mall-walking friends.
55
00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:42,662
Seymour is a very vigorous 72.
56
00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:43,997
That's still way too...
57
00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:46,166
We'll talk about this at home.
58
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,420
I'll take a mall walker.
59
00:02:50,420 --> 00:02:53,006
As long as he doesn't
actually have a walker.
60
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:54,841
Oh, screw it,
he can have a walker.
61
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:57,135
But he has to have his hair.
62
00:02:57,135 --> 00:02:59,262
Ugh, what do I need hair for?
63
00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:02,140
I'm desperate, too.
I just hit on my Sparkletts guy.
64
00:03:02,140 --> 00:03:06,186
It didn't go well.
I can't have water now.
65
00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:08,730
You know, you and Andy
could be fun.
66
00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:09,898
We think so.
67
00:03:09,898 --> 00:03:11,149
I mean, you don't have
a vacation home,
68
00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:12,609
but you do have a nice pool.
69
00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:14,027
I have a vacation home.
70
00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:17,864
You do?
No. Not in Santa Barbara,
not anywhere.
71
00:03:19,533 --> 00:03:22,202
Split six ways?
Actually, I only had soup.
72
00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:23,912
Oh, I did have two iced teas.
73
00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:26,206
(sighs)
I'll get the calculator.
74
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,083
I'm gonna hit the ladies'.
75
00:03:28,083 --> 00:03:30,210
Tell me what I owe you
when I get back.
76
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:32,129
I'll go with you. You know
what they say about BLTs.
77
00:03:32,129 --> 00:03:34,840
You don't buy 'em, you rent 'em.
78
00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:39,010
Wouldn't that be true
of all food?
79
00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:43,056
I find it's best not
to press these things.
80
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:45,892
I don't have to go,
I just need to talk.
81
00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:48,895
Oh, okay. I'll just,
I'll just be a minute.
82
00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:50,772
No, Marjorie is driving me nuts.
83
00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,399
Can this wait a sec?
84
00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:55,569
Christy, I was in prison seven
years. The mystery's gone.
85
00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:58,447
Okay, don't have to go anymore.
86
00:03:58,447 --> 00:04:01,074
You see how she's going all
Scrooge McDuck with the bill?
87
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,076
That's nothing compared
to how she is at home.
88
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:05,162
She's cheap, she's controlling.
89
00:04:05,162 --> 00:04:07,080
I mean, even the cats
are avoiding her.
90
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:10,083
I'm serious.
We exchange knowing glances.
91
00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:11,585
You think it's hard
living with Marjorie?
92
00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:13,003
Try living with my mother.
93
00:04:13,003 --> 00:04:15,130
She is the reason I
don't bring guys home.
94
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:18,216
Well, she's one of the reasons.
95
00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:19,593
Does Bonnie freak out
96
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,595
when you accidentally
throw out the Valpak?
97
00:04:21,595 --> 00:04:24,097
"Damn it to hell,
you threw out the Valpak!"
98
00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:27,350
That is such a Marjorie
word. "Valpak."
99
00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:29,436
Oh, you know what's
another good one?
100
00:04:29,436 --> 00:04:31,229
"Trash bag."
101
00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:35,025
"Tammy, I found a Valpak
in the trash bag."
102
00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:40,447
It's not funny when you live
with it, Christy.
103
00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:42,282
If it's so bad,
why don't you save up some money
104
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,283
and get your own place?
105
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:44,451
I have enough money now.
106
00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:46,244
I'm crushing it
with the handyman stuff.
107
00:04:46,244 --> 00:04:47,913
Williams-Sonoma has me
fixing stuff there
108
00:04:47,913 --> 00:04:49,372
for the next three weeks.
109
00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:52,250
Did you know that they make
pasta with zucchini?
110
00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,961
News flash: still vegetables.
111
00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:59,633
You have money to live alone
without an annoying older woman?
112
00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:01,134
That's my dream.
113
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:11,311
You each owe 16 bucks,
so wipe it, zip it, wrap it up.
114
00:05:15,607 --> 00:05:17,108
Move out.
115
00:05:17,108 --> 00:05:19,986
Do it, do it for me.
116
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:24,658
Get out. It's a grill and
a stick-burning smoker?
117
00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:26,660
Buddy, you can make a cake
with this thing.
118
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:27,953
Won't it stink?
119
00:05:27,953 --> 00:05:30,622
Yeah. But you made it
in a barbecue.
120
00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:34,626
And check this out.
You can isolate zones.
121
00:05:34,626 --> 00:05:36,628
I'm going slow and low
on the pork butt
122
00:05:36,628 --> 00:05:39,506
while I sear with high heat
on the lamb chops.
123
00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:42,717
See this? It's my mind.
124
00:05:42,717 --> 00:05:46,680
Know why it's over here?
'Cause it's blown.
125
00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:48,848
To meat.
Meat.
126
00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:50,267
(chuckles)
127
00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:53,270
Look at 'em. It's like
the best playdate ever.
128
00:05:53,270 --> 00:05:55,814
(chuckles) I don't think
I'm gonna get mine to leave.
129
00:05:55,814 --> 00:05:58,984
You guys are such a nice break
from Andy's cop friends.
130
00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:00,694
I mean, how many times
can a girl laugh
131
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:04,864
when a guy says "Don't worry,
it is a gun in my pocket."
132
00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:07,576
I'm willing to bet at least
one of them wasn't a gun.
133
00:06:07,576 --> 00:06:11,496
Herb, with the
lingering hugs.
134
00:06:11,496 --> 00:06:13,373
I got to say, I'm
glad we did this.
135
00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:15,375
Doing this couple
thing is fun.
136
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:18,128
It is. So this
Santa Barbara house,
137
00:06:18,128 --> 00:06:22,799
if we climb a tree,
can we see Oprah?
138
00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:26,386
(slurring):
To dessert.
(slurring): To dessert.
139
00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,555
They should make meat dessert.
140
00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:31,016
Like meat in a pie.
141
00:06:31,016 --> 00:06:33,893
Meatloaf pot pie.
142
00:06:33,893 --> 00:06:35,395
But no peas.
143
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:38,106
Why do people ruin
everything with peas?
144
00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:40,317
Get out of here, peas.
145
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:44,696
Mm. Okay.
146
00:06:44,696 --> 00:06:46,406
Whoa.
147
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,824
One more Predator handshake.
148
00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:49,075
Do you want to be Dutch?
149
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,744
I am Dutch.
150
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:53,705
(Schwarzenegger voice):
What's the matter, Dillon?
151
00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:58,585
FBI got you pushing
too many pencils?
152
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,758
Did we look this stupid
when we were drinking?
153
00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:07,385
Yes, but I still got laid.
154
00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:09,095
And let's be honest,
so will they.
155
00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,430
ANDY (regular voice):
Hey, babe.
156
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:15,226
Babe. Let's fire up the
'cuzza-- Jacuzzaroo.
157
00:07:15,226 --> 00:07:17,854
He has never called it that.
158
00:07:17,854 --> 00:07:20,815
Come on, Bonnie, 'c-cuzzaroo.
159
00:07:20,815 --> 00:07:22,609
'Cuzzaroo!
160
00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:23,526
'Cuzzar...
161
00:07:23,526 --> 00:07:26,404
Oh, like there's
a chance in hell
162
00:07:26,404 --> 00:07:28,740
we're gonna get naked
in front of...
163
00:07:32,661 --> 00:07:35,288
I loved your share, Tammy.
Thanks.
164
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:38,375
Even though you did
ignore the timer twice.
165
00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:41,419
I live a big life, Marjorie.
And it wasn't twice....
166
00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:43,213
We'll talk about this at home.
167
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:46,132
I need you.
168
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:47,592
What's going on?
169
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:49,177
I found a great apartment,
but I got to give them
170
00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:51,179
a check on Friday
or I lose the place.
171
00:07:51,179 --> 00:07:52,972
Fantastic. Give them a check.
172
00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:54,307
I still haven't told Marjorie.
173
00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:55,850
I started to,
but then I got cold feet.
174
00:07:55,850 --> 00:07:57,769
And then I accidentally
threw out another Valpak,
175
00:07:57,769 --> 00:08:00,480
so I was coming
from a position of weakness.
176
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,190
Will you talk to her for me?
177
00:08:02,190 --> 00:08:05,193
This is something
you got to do alone.
178
00:08:05,193 --> 00:08:07,779
Like your 40s.
179
00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:09,989
Please? I work a half-day
at Williams-Sonoma tomorrow.
180
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:12,325
You guys can come by
and we can go out to lunch.
181
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:15,328
Okay, but you're assuming
she's gonna be upset.
182
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,830
She could be happy.
183
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:19,499
Why would she be happy?
184
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:22,669
Right, she's gonna be
devastated. It'll be good.
185
00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:26,840
Hey, couple buddy.
Hey, you.
186
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,967
Adam could not stop talking
about Andy and your barbecue.
187
00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:30,969
So, listen, what do you say
188
00:08:30,969 --> 00:08:32,971
we recapture the
magic this weekend?
189
00:08:32,971 --> 00:08:36,015
Maybe take a little drive down
to your place in Santa Barbara?
190
00:08:36,015 --> 00:08:38,017
Ooh, this weekend?
191
00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:41,354
Or next.
Ooh, next?
192
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:43,940
We could do it another time. Do
you want to do it another time?
193
00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:46,818
(high-pitched): Yeah,
absolutely. Let's make a date.
194
00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:49,195
I have a calendar on my phone.
195
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:52,532
I just learned
how to, how to use it.
196
00:08:55,618 --> 00:08:57,162
Way to go, pally.
197
00:08:57,162 --> 00:09:00,498
Jill and Andy hate us,
and it's all your fault.
198
00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:03,001
Jill and Andy don't hate us.
199
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:04,961
Yes, they do. They don't want
to go out with us anymore.
200
00:09:04,961 --> 00:09:06,838
So now it's just gonna be you,
me, and-- let's be honest--
201
00:09:06,838 --> 00:09:08,631
Christy until we die.
202
00:09:09,299 --> 00:09:11,009
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
203
00:09:11,009 --> 00:09:13,219
Andy and I are great.
Yeah, I thought so,
too, when he was
204
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:15,221
Officer and a Gentleman-ing
you out of the hot tub,
205
00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:18,850
but, uh... apparently not.
206
00:09:18,850 --> 00:09:20,226
Why are you so sure it's me?
207
00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:21,770
Who else was there?
208
00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:29,319
"Andy, want to grab a beer?"
209
00:09:29,319 --> 00:09:33,072
Prepare to be ghosted,
because you're never gonna...
(phone chimes)
210
00:09:33,072 --> 00:09:34,491
"Now? Sure."
211
00:09:34,491 --> 00:09:36,242
(phone chimes)
212
00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:38,203
And a fist bump. It's you.
213
00:09:46,628 --> 00:09:47,879
Oh.
214
00:09:47,879 --> 00:09:50,006
It smells so good in here.
(chuckles)
215
00:09:50,006 --> 00:09:52,592
It's like a pumpkin made love
to a gingerbread man
216
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:54,844
in an orange grove.
217
00:09:54,844 --> 00:09:59,349
I'm just excited you got to meet
some of my mall walker friends.
218
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:01,851
Seymour really
is vigorous.
219
00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:05,355
I hope he calls.
220
00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:07,524
Oh, my God.
What?
221
00:10:07,524 --> 00:10:10,527
Valerie Bertinelli
has that mixer.
222
00:10:10,527 --> 00:10:12,862
Tell Seymour
I want this for Christmas.
223
00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,366
Can I offer you
a sample?
224
00:10:16,366 --> 00:10:19,202
Tomato focaccia with
basil-infused olive oil.
225
00:10:19,202 --> 00:10:21,663
Ooh. Sounds
yummy. Thanks.
226
00:10:21,663 --> 00:10:25,041
Um, I don't suppose
227
00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:27,460
that you would be
hiring, would you?
228
00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:30,171
Uh, well, you could go
to our website
229
00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:32,173
and fill out
an application.
230
00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:34,717
Do you know
what a website is?
231
00:10:37,929 --> 00:10:40,849
I believe I can
figure it out.
232
00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:42,600
Good for you!
233
00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:47,397
Marjorie, is
everything all right?
234
00:10:47,397 --> 00:10:48,898
Yeah. Why?
235
00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:52,402
'Cause it sounded like
you were asking for a job.
236
00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:55,697
Okay. (sighs)
237
00:10:55,697 --> 00:10:57,323
I'm a little embarrassed
about this,
238
00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:58,825
so please don't tell
the other ladies,
239
00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:03,371
but I am having a few...
financial issues.
240
00:11:03,371 --> 00:11:05,290
But I thought
Victor had money.
241
00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:06,708
Well, he did.
242
00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:09,252
And then he got sick,
and between the meds
243
00:11:09,252 --> 00:11:12,213
and the home health care,
there's very little left.
244
00:11:12,213 --> 00:11:13,464
I'm so sorry.
245
00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:15,592
Well, thank God
for Tammy.
246
00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:17,468
If she weren't
kicking in on rent,
247
00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:19,929
I think I might not
still have the house.
248
00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:20,805
TAMMY:
Hey, guys!
249
00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:22,765
Oh, my God,
aren't those good?
250
00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:24,517
I've been eating so many,
my blood type's
251
00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:26,978
tomato focaccia-positive.
(chuckles)
252
00:11:26,978 --> 00:11:29,814
That's just a little
Willy Sonoma humor. (chuckles)
253
00:11:29,814 --> 00:11:31,232
All right, let's
go do this lunch.
254
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,984
No-no-no, no lunch.
255
00:11:32,984 --> 00:11:35,987
Yes, lunch.
We have a lot to talk about.
256
00:11:35,987 --> 00:11:37,906
But I'm not
hungry anymore.
257
00:11:37,906 --> 00:11:40,408
But you promised
you'd be hungry.
258
00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:43,328
But now I've
changed my mind.
259
00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:44,704
But we were gonna
have this lunch,
260
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,873
and you were gonna
support me through that.
261
00:11:46,873 --> 00:11:50,543
But now I'm not,
so I will support you
262
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,420
at a future meal TBD.
263
00:11:52,420 --> 00:11:55,214
Oh...
264
00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:57,133
for heaven's sakes.
265
00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:59,135
She doesn't think
I can afford lunch
266
00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:01,262
because I just told her
I was having
267
00:12:01,262 --> 00:12:02,764
a few money problems.
268
00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:07,226
And that your rent
was really saving her.
269
00:12:07,226 --> 00:12:10,480
Oh!
270
00:12:12,148 --> 00:12:13,816
No lunch.
271
00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:24,160
Knock, knock.
272
00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:26,496
Bonnie. (exhales)
273
00:12:26,496 --> 00:12:27,830
What are you doing here...
274
00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:30,541
past two maids and a gate?
275
00:12:31,834 --> 00:12:33,169
I was just in
the neighborhood,
276
00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:36,005
thought I'd drop in to find out
why you hate me.
277
00:12:37,382 --> 00:12:38,633
Is it 'cause I broke
the fairy statue
278
00:12:38,633 --> 00:12:39,968
in the guest bathroom?
279
00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:43,805
It's a sea sprite,
and I didn't know about that.
280
00:12:43,805 --> 00:12:46,599
The wings
are in the toilet tank.
281
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:49,602
So, what'd I do?
282
00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:52,563
Nothing.
Great. So, when are the four
of us gonna hang out again?
283
00:12:52,563 --> 00:12:54,023
Real soon.
284
00:12:54,023 --> 00:12:57,235
Look at you, lying to me
right in front of Buddha.
285
00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:00,405
I'm not lying!
286
00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:02,031
Really? You sure about that?
287
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:04,867
I know "real soon" is code
288
00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:06,285
for "don't want to do it."
289
00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:08,287
Okay, then why don't you shut up
290
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:10,999
and pretend like everything's
fine like a normal person?
291
00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:12,750
Because I want to know
what I did.
292
00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:15,378
(sighing):
Oh, God.
293
00:13:15,378 --> 00:13:16,713
It isn't you, it's Adam.
294
00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:19,549
I knew it!
(whoops)
295
00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:21,676
Is it the loud chewing?
296
00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:23,886
'Cause maybe we just
don't have salad.
297
00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:29,600
No. It's not that.
He's a great guy.
298
00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:35,023
I was just really uncomfortable
watching Andy get drunk.
299
00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:38,109
I've never seen him
like that before.
300
00:13:38,109 --> 00:13:40,903
And you're afraid
if he and Adam hang out,
301
00:13:40,903 --> 00:13:42,155
it'll become a regular thing?
302
00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:44,991
Well, Adam does
like to party.
303
00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:50,163
I guess I just realized
that I don't want to be
304
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,748
around that anymore.
305
00:13:51,748 --> 00:13:53,332
I don't know
how you do it.
306
00:13:53,332 --> 00:13:55,585
Honestly,
I don't mind.
307
00:13:55,585 --> 00:13:57,462
When he has a beer
and a half at night,
308
00:13:57,462 --> 00:13:58,629
it reminds me
I can't drink that way,
309
00:13:58,629 --> 00:14:00,131
and when he occasionally
gets sloppy,
310
00:14:00,131 --> 00:14:02,550
it reminds me I don't want
to drink that way, so...
311
00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:04,552
Also, he broke
the sea sprite.
312
00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:11,476
Do you think I'm
being too rigid?
313
00:14:11,476 --> 00:14:12,602
What I think
doesn't matter.
314
00:14:12,602 --> 00:14:14,771
You have to do
what's right for you.
315
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:18,775
Thanks.
316
00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:20,985
You're a really
good friend.
317
00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:23,279
The kind of friend
who gets a spare key
318
00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:25,990
to your Santa Barbara house?
Don't say anything.
319
00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:31,704
Think about it.
320
00:14:33,915 --> 00:14:35,958
(music playing on TV)
(chuckles)
321
00:14:35,958 --> 00:14:37,627
(sighs)
322
00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:41,964
Oh, by the way,
it was you.
323
00:14:49,472 --> 00:14:53,351
I just never expected to be
without money at this age.
324
00:14:53,351 --> 00:14:56,521
It's humiliating.
Who will hire me?
325
00:14:56,521 --> 00:14:58,022
I haven't worked in years.
326
00:14:58,022 --> 00:15:01,150
I'm over 65.
I have a record.
327
00:15:02,985 --> 00:15:04,987
Don't worry.
There's gonna be
328
00:15:04,987 --> 00:15:07,865
plenty of places
that will hire you.
329
00:15:07,865 --> 00:15:10,034
Tammy, would you pass
the focaccia?
Mm.
330
00:15:10,868 --> 00:15:13,621
Ooh,
are those samples?
331
00:15:14,455 --> 00:15:18,042
No, we brought them
from home.
332
00:15:23,548 --> 00:15:25,174
Nice work, Christy.
333
00:15:26,425 --> 00:15:28,845
I've been job hunting for weeks.
334
00:15:28,845 --> 00:15:30,555
If I don't find something,
335
00:15:30,555 --> 00:15:32,473
I may have to sell my house.
336
00:15:32,473 --> 00:15:34,142
(sighs)
337
00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:38,729
What'll happen to my cats?
They're old. Like me.
338
00:15:39,856 --> 00:15:42,024
People don't take in old cats.
339
00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:44,652
Yeah, but unlike you,
people can't necessarily tell
340
00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:46,904
that the cats are old.
341
00:15:54,036 --> 00:15:56,706
Look, Marjorie,
I've been where you are.
342
00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:59,041
I know how you feel,
so I'm going to say to you
343
00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:01,961
what you always say to me
when I'm spinning out.
344
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,254
You have a roof
over your head.
345
00:16:03,254 --> 00:16:05,256
Yes, but...
Are your bills paid?
346
00:16:05,256 --> 00:16:07,049
Okay. I know
where this is going.
347
00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:08,384
Do you have food
in your fridge?
348
00:16:08,384 --> 00:16:10,720
Yes.
Minus the French
vanilla yogurt.
349
00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:12,221
I didn't eat it,
I spilled it.
350
00:16:12,221 --> 00:16:14,473
You know what? We'll
talk about it at home.
351
00:16:14,473 --> 00:16:16,893
(sighs)
352
00:16:16,893 --> 00:16:19,520
Just take it
one day at a time.
353
00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:23,274
At least for today,
you have everything you need.
354
00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:25,902
Worst-case scenario,
which rarely happens,
355
00:16:25,902 --> 00:16:28,237
you're never gonna be on
the street, because you have us.
356
00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:29,739
And we're roomies
for life.
357
00:16:29,739 --> 00:16:31,282
In fact, you should
raise my rent.
358
00:16:31,282 --> 00:16:34,368
I'm making money like
a call girl at the ESPYs.
359
00:16:41,918 --> 00:16:44,378
(sniffs)
Mmm, smells good.
360
00:16:44,378 --> 00:16:47,089
Well, that's curious,
'cause nothing's cooking yet.
361
00:16:48,382 --> 00:16:50,927
Got to get this baby
seasoned up so it can rest
362
00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:52,428
before it faces
the flame.
363
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:54,347
Hey, would you mind
grabbing me a beer?
364
00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:55,932
I'd get it myself,
but, you know,
365
00:16:55,932 --> 00:16:58,768
the timing on
this is crucial.
366
00:16:58,768 --> 00:17:01,062
Andy, can we talk?
367
00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:05,775
You mean right now, during
the crucial seasoning phase?
368
00:17:05,775 --> 00:17:08,694
Yeah.
369
00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:11,739
Uh... sure.
370
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:18,412
I don't know how
to say this.
371
00:17:18,412 --> 00:17:20,081
Well, you know,
take your time
372
00:17:20,081 --> 00:17:22,500
and gather
your thoughts.
373
00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:26,712
No, I need
to get this out now.
374
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:28,798
Yeah.
375
00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:33,052
The other night when Bonnie
and Adam were here, I just...
376
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,138
I don't know,
I-I was really uncomfortable
377
00:17:36,138 --> 00:17:37,682
being around that kind
of drinking.
378
00:17:37,682 --> 00:17:41,143
Oh. Yeah, uh,
379
00:17:41,143 --> 00:17:43,896
sorry about that. We
kind of went overboard.
380
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,774
The thing is...
381
00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:49,819
it made me realize that I want
to have a sober home,
382
00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:52,530
and that includes...
being with someone
383
00:17:52,530 --> 00:17:53,906
who doesn't drink.
384
00:17:55,700 --> 00:17:57,201
Oh.
385
00:17:59,287 --> 00:18:01,831
This is hard, because
you're the best thing
386
00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:04,375
that's happened to me
in a long time.
387
00:18:04,375 --> 00:18:06,669
Maybe ever.
388
00:18:06,669 --> 00:18:09,922
And it's not like I think
you have a drinking problem.
389
00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:13,384
I know you drink
like a regular guy.
390
00:18:13,384 --> 00:18:17,805
But, honestly, I don't want
to kiss you and taste beer.
391
00:18:19,724 --> 00:18:21,475
Not that that's wrong for you.
392
00:18:21,475 --> 00:18:24,520
I mean, you have your way
of living, and I have mine.
393
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:27,023
Maybe the two don't blend.
394
00:18:28,024 --> 00:18:30,276
Like-like a bad
Long Island iced tea.
395
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:31,485
You know, I've had
some good ones,
396
00:18:31,485 --> 00:18:32,820
I've had some bad ones,
397
00:18:32,820 --> 00:18:35,197
I've had a lot of 'em
because I'm an alcoholic.
398
00:18:36,699 --> 00:18:39,618
And this just isn't gonna
work out between the two of us,
399
00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:42,038
um, so goodbye.
400
00:18:43,873 --> 00:18:48,377
Or... I could just not drink.
401
00:18:48,377 --> 00:18:50,129
What?
402
00:18:51,756 --> 00:18:55,134
I mean, if it makes you
uncomfortable, I won't drink.
403
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:58,387
You can do that?
404
00:18:58,387 --> 00:18:59,847
Absolutely.
405
00:19:00,931 --> 00:19:02,892
Oh, my God.
406
00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:04,727
I love that you
would do that for me.
407
00:19:04,727 --> 00:19:05,978
Aw...
408
00:19:06,896 --> 00:19:09,565
And I hate you because you can.
409
00:19:20,242 --> 00:19:21,869
You know, I love Marjorie.
410
00:19:21,869 --> 00:19:23,371
And I know she's
going through a tough time,
411
00:19:23,371 --> 00:19:24,955
and I'm gonna be there for
her no matter what it takes.
412
00:19:24,955 --> 00:19:25,998
But I got
to be honest.
413
00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:27,666
It is not easy.
(chuckles)
414
00:19:27,666 --> 00:19:29,126
I'm so stressed.
415
00:19:29,126 --> 00:19:31,003
I wake up every night
in a cold sweat
416
00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:35,216
because I dreamt I accidentally
threw out the Valpak. Again.
417
00:19:36,801 --> 00:19:40,471
You know what?
You do get used to it.
30664
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