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1
00:00:02,393 --> 00:00:03,916
Jill, you'’re a seven, right?
2
00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:05,744
If I'’m a seven,
you'’re a four.
3
00:00:05,788 --> 00:00:08,138
Meow!
4
00:00:08,182 --> 00:00:10,140
I meant your shoe size.
5
00:00:10,184 --> 00:00:12,142
Oh. In that case, yes.
6
00:00:12,186 --> 00:00:13,622
And sorry for snappin'’ at ya.
7
00:00:13,665 --> 00:00:15,624
When you have your hair down
and gloss those lips,
8
00:00:15,667 --> 00:00:18,192
you'’re a solid six.
9
00:00:18,235 --> 00:00:19,541
Thanks.
10
00:00:19,584 --> 00:00:20,977
I was just hoping to borrow
some cowboy boots.
11
00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:22,631
She'’s got a date
with a hillbilly.
12
00:00:22,674 --> 00:00:24,111
He'’s not a hillbilly.
13
00:00:24,154 --> 00:00:25,721
He'’s taking you
country line dancing,
14
00:00:25,764 --> 00:00:28,115
so he'’s a hillbilly
from the early '’90s.
15
00:00:28,158 --> 00:00:31,161
Hey, it'’s still cool
to line dance.
16
00:00:31,205 --> 00:00:32,945
I take a line dance
aerobics class.
17
00:00:32,989 --> 00:00:35,731
And who'’s cooler
than Marjorie?
18
00:00:35,774 --> 00:00:38,299
I'’ve got a date with a
coordinated man who has a penis.
19
00:00:38,342 --> 00:00:40,214
I'’d do the polka, if
that'’s what it took.
20
00:00:40,257 --> 00:00:42,825
Do you even have a clue
how to line dance?
21
00:00:42,868 --> 00:00:45,741
Yeah. You wear cute boots
and dance in a line.
22
00:00:45,784 --> 00:00:48,352
Ugh. Oh, I did not
just hear that.
23
00:00:48,396 --> 00:00:50,920
You are gonna lose that fella
to a gal who knows
24
00:00:50,963 --> 00:00:53,966
how to tush push you right out
of a two wall formation change.
25
00:00:54,010 --> 00:00:54,967
A two wall what?
26
00:00:55,011 --> 00:00:57,622
All right. Line up, ladies.
27
00:00:57,666 --> 00:01:00,495
Let'’s show Christy
a little country heat.
28
00:01:00,538 --> 00:01:02,801
Shouldn'’t
we stretch first?
29
00:01:02,845 --> 00:01:04,238
I got to tinkle.
30
00:01:04,281 --> 00:01:05,717
No, no time.
31
00:01:05,761 --> 00:01:07,458
The Gamblers Anonymous people
will be here any minute,
32
00:01:07,502 --> 00:01:09,634
and I owe one of them
a couple hundred dollars.
33
00:01:09,678 --> 00:01:10,896
[upbeat country song playing]
34
00:01:10,940 --> 00:01:12,550
Okay, now,
this is your basic step.
35
00:01:12,594 --> 00:01:13,943
Follow my lead.
36
00:01:13,986 --> 00:01:17,686
Five, six.
Five, six, seven, eight.
37
00:01:17,729 --> 00:01:20,602
Step, back, side, touch.
Step, back, side, touch.
38
00:01:20,645 --> 00:01:23,126
Pivot, pivot.
39
00:01:23,170 --> 00:01:25,172
Kick ball change,
twist, twist...
40
00:01:25,215 --> 00:01:27,261
Oh, dear Lord,
how were you ever a stripper?
41
00:01:27,304 --> 00:01:31,047
You put glitter on your boobs
and Def Leppard'’s playing.
42
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,527
Nobody'’s looking
at your feet.
43
00:01:32,570 --> 00:01:34,529
[phone ringing]
44
00:01:34,572 --> 00:01:36,270
Hello?
45
00:01:36,313 --> 00:01:38,141
Yeah, this is she.
46
00:01:38,185 --> 00:01:40,274
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
47
00:01:40,317 --> 00:01:42,667
Okay, well, thanks for calling.
48
00:01:42,711 --> 00:01:43,799
Who was that?
49
00:01:43,842 --> 00:01:45,409
Uh, some lawyer.
My mother'’s dead.
50
00:01:45,453 --> 00:01:47,063
Pivot, pivot.
51
00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:49,021
Kick ball change...
52
00:01:50,719 --> 00:01:53,287
What?
53
00:01:53,330 --> 00:01:55,245
♪
54
00:02:10,347 --> 00:02:11,609
You doin'’ all right?
55
00:02:11,653 --> 00:02:12,828
Yeah. Why?
56
00:02:12,871 --> 00:02:14,308
MARJORIE:
Bonnie,
57
00:02:14,351 --> 00:02:15,918
we'’re your friends.
58
00:02:15,961 --> 00:02:18,007
Knock, knock, let us in.
59
00:02:20,096 --> 00:02:21,880
What? You mean my mother?
60
00:02:21,924 --> 00:02:24,274
I barely knew the
woman. I'’m fine.
61
00:02:24,318 --> 00:02:27,712
I wish this was a true
medium rare, but I'’m fine.
62
00:02:27,756 --> 00:02:30,062
You'’re not sad
that she died?
63
00:02:30,106 --> 00:02:32,717
No, but you seem to be
snottin'’ it up pretty good.
64
00:02:34,850 --> 00:02:37,635
Okay, I got a little
more information.
65
00:02:37,679 --> 00:02:40,072
She was in the hospital,
she didn'’t suffer,
66
00:02:40,116 --> 00:02:41,291
she went quick.
67
00:02:41,335 --> 00:02:43,032
Not quick enough.
68
00:02:43,075 --> 00:02:43,902
Oh, Bonnie...
69
00:02:43,946 --> 00:02:45,469
Oh, Wendy!
70
00:02:47,254 --> 00:02:49,430
And her landlord wants
everything out of the apartment.
71
00:02:49,473 --> 00:02:51,736
So I guess we'’re going
to San Francisco.
72
00:02:51,780 --> 00:02:53,216
Pass.Pass?
73
00:02:53,260 --> 00:02:55,436
They can dump her stuff
in the bay, for all I care.
74
00:02:55,479 --> 00:02:56,350
Oh, Bonnie...
75
00:02:56,393 --> 00:02:58,047
That'’s two!
76
00:02:58,090 --> 00:03:00,832
You don'’t want to find out
what happens at three!
77
00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:05,446
You don'’t.
78
00:03:05,489 --> 00:03:07,622
This is all very fresh.
79
00:03:07,665 --> 00:03:09,450
But when you have
a little distance,
80
00:03:09,493 --> 00:03:12,322
you might regret not going
and getting some closure.
81
00:03:12,366 --> 00:03:13,976
Might help you get rid
of some of that anger.
82
00:03:14,019 --> 00:03:16,065
What anger?But it'’s your...
83
00:03:16,108 --> 00:03:17,936
Do not say "mother"!
84
00:03:17,980 --> 00:03:20,243
A mother is someone who sticks
around, day in, day out,
85
00:03:20,287 --> 00:03:22,245
and pays the price,
like I did with her.
86
00:03:22,289 --> 00:03:24,726
Well, you didn'’t exactly...Not the time.
87
00:03:24,769 --> 00:03:26,902
Her mother just died, her
burger'’s not pink in the middle,
88
00:03:26,945 --> 00:03:29,209
and she'’s about
to punch Wendy.
89
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,484
[sighs]
90
00:03:49,577 --> 00:03:51,013
Couldn'’t sleep?
91
00:03:51,056 --> 00:03:52,536
No.
92
00:03:52,580 --> 00:03:54,756
And I was so hoping
you'’d come downstairs
93
00:03:54,799 --> 00:03:57,672
so we could have a deep,
life-affirming talk about it.
94
00:03:57,715 --> 00:03:59,717
Kiss my ass.
95
00:04:02,329 --> 00:04:05,506
You know, you might not care
that you lost your mother,
96
00:04:05,549 --> 00:04:07,290
but I lost my
grandmother.
97
00:04:07,334 --> 00:04:10,598
If I kiss your ass,
will you leave me alone?
98
00:04:10,641 --> 00:04:14,297
You do understand we'’re never
gonna see this woman again.
99
00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:16,604
And you understand
we never saw her before.
100
00:04:16,647 --> 00:04:18,562
Christy, if you and I
101
00:04:18,606 --> 00:04:21,173
had never reconnected and I
died, would you have mourned me?
102
00:04:21,217 --> 00:04:22,958
Yes, I would have.
103
00:04:23,001 --> 00:04:25,177
Oh, come on.
Those years we weren'’t speaking,
104
00:04:25,221 --> 00:04:27,267
did you even
think about me at all?
105
00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:28,616
Every day.
106
00:04:28,659 --> 00:04:30,313
Really?
Yes.
107
00:04:30,357 --> 00:04:31,967
You never called.
108
00:04:32,010 --> 00:04:35,362
For 18 months, you didn'’t have
phone privileges.
109
00:04:35,405 --> 00:04:38,887
Give me one good reason
why I should go to San Francisco
110
00:04:38,930 --> 00:04:40,628
and rummage around
that old woman'’s apartment.
111
00:04:40,671 --> 00:04:43,152
And don'’t give me any of that
emotional closure crap.
112
00:04:43,195 --> 00:04:45,763
Maybe you could find
some stuff to sell.
113
00:04:45,807 --> 00:04:47,983
You should'’ve led with that.
I'’m in.
114
00:04:51,247 --> 00:04:54,555
Hello, Wendy'’s next
birthday present.
115
00:04:54,598 --> 00:04:57,906
Good news: we inherited a
closet full of soap operas
116
00:04:57,949 --> 00:05:02,345
and a VHS player that was--
get this-- built in America.
117
00:05:02,389 --> 00:05:04,521
Aw.
118
00:05:04,565 --> 00:05:06,871
She liked soap operas.
119
00:05:06,915 --> 00:05:10,048
I bet she watched them
to fill her lonely life.
120
00:05:10,092 --> 00:05:11,789
Oh, grow up, Bambi.
121
00:05:13,574 --> 00:05:16,490
The only reason we'’re here
is to find crap we can sell.
122
00:05:16,533 --> 00:05:18,143
That'’s your reason.
123
00:05:18,187 --> 00:05:20,232
I came here to learn
about my grandmother.
124
00:05:20,276 --> 00:05:22,234
Let me give you a thumbnail:
she smoked Camels,
125
00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:24,759
wore clogs, and gave
away her daughter.
126
00:05:24,802 --> 00:05:26,935
Hey, Cranky,
I think you need to eat.
127
00:05:26,978 --> 00:05:28,589
Maybe there'’s something
in the fridge.
128
00:05:28,632 --> 00:05:31,809
Yeah, probably a six-pack
of Ensure and some radishes.
129
00:05:33,637 --> 00:05:36,727
Ooh, even better, a shriveled
lemon and some batteries.
130
00:05:36,771 --> 00:05:40,601
Aw, she liked lemons.
131
00:05:40,644 --> 00:05:42,690
Probably to put in the tea
that she drank
132
00:05:42,733 --> 00:05:45,127
while she watched her stories.
133
00:05:45,170 --> 00:05:46,346
Stop it!
134
00:05:49,131 --> 00:05:50,654
Why can'’t this be like
in the movies,
135
00:05:50,698 --> 00:05:52,656
where I wear a black suit
and a veil
136
00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:55,746
and pretend to cry into a hanky
while a lawyer hands me a check,
137
00:05:55,790 --> 00:05:58,532
and... Oh, my God, you'’re
not gonna believe what I found.
138
00:05:58,575 --> 00:06:01,099
If it'’s a dead cat, lie to me.
139
00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:03,798
It'’s a big bag of cash. Look!
140
00:06:03,841 --> 00:06:06,278
If it'’s a dead cat,
I am gonna kill you.
141
00:06:06,322 --> 00:06:09,456
No, it really is
a big bag of cash!
142
00:06:09,499 --> 00:06:12,110
Oh, Mommy, I knew
you were looking out for me!
143
00:06:17,725 --> 00:06:20,510
I'’ve got $2,438.
144
00:06:20,554 --> 00:06:21,772
You?
145
00:06:21,816 --> 00:06:23,731
I got $673.
146
00:06:26,647 --> 00:06:28,562
Really?
Sorry.
147
00:06:28,605 --> 00:06:31,086
Old habit. $3,084.
148
00:06:31,129 --> 00:06:32,740
Oh, my God.
149
00:06:32,783 --> 00:06:34,916
Altogether, that'’s, um...
150
00:06:37,005 --> 00:06:39,834
Carry the six...
151
00:06:39,877 --> 00:06:43,272
Let'’s just say we have
between five and six grand.
152
00:06:43,315 --> 00:06:45,927
"We"?
Yeah, "we."
153
00:06:45,970 --> 00:06:48,233
I don'’t mean to pull rank here,
but she was my mother.
154
00:06:48,277 --> 00:06:49,800
You wouldn'’t even know
about the money
155
00:06:49,844 --> 00:06:51,411
if I hadn'’t dragged you
down here.
156
00:06:51,454 --> 00:06:53,456
You just came
so you could fence her toaster.
157
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:54,936
We'’re still doing that.
158
00:06:54,979 --> 00:06:57,242
Come on, grab the boxes,
I'’ll take the cash.
159
00:06:57,286 --> 00:06:58,722
Nice try.
160
00:06:58,766 --> 00:07:01,725
Let'’s just go.
161
00:07:01,769 --> 00:07:03,988
It'’s kind of sad.
162
00:07:04,032 --> 00:07:07,209
The woman lived her whole life,
and all she had to show for it
163
00:07:07,252 --> 00:07:09,516
were a few tchotchkes
and a wad of cash.
164
00:07:09,559 --> 00:07:10,604
And me.
165
00:07:10,647 --> 00:07:12,823
I was including you
as a tchotchke.
166
00:07:16,261 --> 00:07:17,437
Who are you?
167
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:18,612
Who are you?
168
00:07:18,655 --> 00:07:20,483
This is my mother'’s place.
169
00:07:20,527 --> 00:07:22,224
Oh, my God.
170
00:07:22,267 --> 00:07:25,488
Have we been cleaning out
the wrong apartment?
171
00:07:30,275 --> 00:07:31,799
Who exactly is
your mother?
172
00:07:31,842 --> 00:07:33,627
Shirley Stabler.
173
00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:36,847
Wow. Grandma just got
a lot more interesting.
174
00:07:38,936 --> 00:07:41,156
Not so fast. I
know this hustle.
175
00:07:41,199 --> 00:07:42,766
What hustle?You scan the obits,
176
00:07:42,810 --> 00:07:44,812
find out about an old lady
that'’s dead,
177
00:07:44,855 --> 00:07:47,249
show up to her apartment
claiming to be a relative.
178
00:07:47,292 --> 00:07:48,337
Who does that?
179
00:07:48,380 --> 00:07:50,252
I'’ve done it.
180
00:07:50,295 --> 00:07:52,210
Yeah. It works every time.
181
00:07:52,254 --> 00:07:54,256
Except when you get sloppy.
My mother was white.
182
00:07:54,299 --> 00:07:55,518
So was mine.
183
00:07:55,562 --> 00:07:57,912
Look, here.
184
00:07:57,955 --> 00:08:00,654
This is my mother
with my father.
185
00:08:00,697 --> 00:08:02,656
Wow.
186
00:08:02,699 --> 00:08:04,875
There'’s Grandma with a
[whispers]: black man.
187
00:08:07,312 --> 00:08:08,531
I'’m sorry.
That was weird.
188
00:08:08,575 --> 00:08:09,967
I don'’t know
why I whispered.
189
00:08:10,011 --> 00:08:11,578
We have black friends.
190
00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:15,669
I'’m sorry, I'm gonna need
some proof, Miss...?
191
00:08:15,712 --> 00:08:16,539
You first.
192
00:08:16,583 --> 00:08:17,627
Ray Stabler.
193
00:08:17,671 --> 00:08:19,411
Bonnie Plunkett.Christy Plunkett.
194
00:08:19,455 --> 00:08:21,979
Unfortunately, the only proof
I can show you is a picture
195
00:08:22,023 --> 00:08:26,070
of the fire station she dumped
me at when I was four.
196
00:08:26,114 --> 00:08:28,856
Here'’s the e-mail we
got from a lawyer.
197
00:08:30,945 --> 00:08:33,338
This is crazy.
198
00:08:33,382 --> 00:08:36,037
Are you saying
you'’re my... sister?
199
00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:38,692
I'’m not sayin'
nothin'’ to nobody.
200
00:08:38,735 --> 00:08:41,695
Unbelievable.
201
00:08:41,738 --> 00:08:44,175
I saw her in the hospital
right before she passed,
202
00:08:44,219 --> 00:08:45,612
and she never mentioned
a daughter.
203
00:08:45,655 --> 00:08:47,178
Just said,
"Look in the freezer."
204
00:08:53,315 --> 00:08:55,230
Well, that makes no sense.
205
00:08:56,361 --> 00:08:58,102
Dementia, huh?Cancer.
206
00:08:58,146 --> 00:08:59,103
Same thing.
207
00:09:00,757 --> 00:09:02,498
So, uh, let me
get this straight.
208
00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,239
She kept you?
209
00:09:04,282 --> 00:09:07,634
I guess it'’s not what you want
to hear, but, yes, she did.
210
00:09:07,677 --> 00:09:09,549
Wow. Even from the grave,
211
00:09:09,592 --> 00:09:12,160
she'’s finding new ways
to stick it to me.
212
00:09:12,203 --> 00:09:14,162
Frozen peas?
213
00:09:14,205 --> 00:09:15,946
Why would she want me
to find these?
214
00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:18,340
Eh, you know,
mothers and vegetables.
215
00:09:18,383 --> 00:09:21,038
[ringtone playing]
216
00:09:21,082 --> 00:09:23,998
Excuse me,
I got to take this.
217
00:09:24,041 --> 00:09:25,434
Yeah, Lorraine.
218
00:09:25,477 --> 00:09:27,262
Put him on.Can you believe this?
219
00:09:27,305 --> 00:09:29,438
She didn'’t want the
girl but kept the boy?
220
00:09:29,481 --> 00:09:31,222
Where are we, China?
221
00:09:31,266 --> 00:09:32,702
Don'’t we have to tell him
about the money?
222
00:09:32,746 --> 00:09:34,051
No! Are you crazy?
223
00:09:34,095 --> 00:09:35,705
But his mom told him
about the freezer.
224
00:09:35,749 --> 00:09:38,360
Yeah, and he got a bag
of peas. Everybody wins.
225
00:09:38,403 --> 00:09:39,666
But now that we'’re sober,
226
00:09:39,709 --> 00:09:40,754
aren'’t we supposed to be
rigorously honest?
227
00:09:40,797 --> 00:09:41,972
Not when it
comes to money.
228
00:09:44,018 --> 00:09:46,194
I'’m sorry about that.
Got a trial coming up.
229
00:09:46,237 --> 00:09:48,196
Oh, really? What'’d
they get you for?
230
00:09:48,239 --> 00:09:50,807
I'’m the lawyer.
231
00:09:50,851 --> 00:09:53,288
Oh. Well, la-dee-da.
232
00:09:53,331 --> 00:09:54,724
CHRISTY:
A lawyer.
233
00:09:54,768 --> 00:09:56,117
That'’s so cool.
234
00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:58,423
You know, I'’m actually
studying to be...
Not now.
235
00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:02,384
Listen, I'’m not really sure
what we'’re supposed to do here.
236
00:10:02,427 --> 00:10:04,038
This is my card.
237
00:10:04,081 --> 00:10:06,606
Give me a call
if you ever want to sit down
238
00:10:06,649 --> 00:10:08,390
and-- I don'’t know-- talk.
239
00:10:12,176 --> 00:10:17,094
Well, I don'’t have a card,
seeing as it'’s not 1947.
240
00:10:17,138 --> 00:10:19,314
Is she always like this?
241
00:10:19,357 --> 00:10:21,664
No, sometimes
she'’s in a bad mood.
242
00:10:21,708 --> 00:10:24,145
I can come back another time.
243
00:10:24,188 --> 00:10:25,929
Take whatever you need,
244
00:10:25,973 --> 00:10:28,671
but if you find any pictures
of an adorable black boy,
245
00:10:28,715 --> 00:10:30,281
don'’t throw 'em out.
246
00:10:30,325 --> 00:10:32,719
Hang on.
247
00:10:32,762 --> 00:10:34,459
This makes a lot more sense now.
248
00:10:34,503 --> 00:10:36,331
You threw out
my Little League picture?
249
00:10:36,374 --> 00:10:37,724
That'’s cold.
250
00:10:37,767 --> 00:10:39,639
Sorry. We thought
you came with the frame.
251
00:10:41,728 --> 00:10:44,644
Okay, I'’m just gonna go.
252
00:10:44,687 --> 00:10:46,254
Wait!
253
00:10:46,297 --> 00:10:48,822
We found a bunch of cash
in the freezer.
No!
254
00:10:51,172 --> 00:10:53,827
It'’s only right
if you take half.
255
00:10:53,870 --> 00:10:55,742
How much is there?
256
00:10:55,785 --> 00:10:58,092
About six grand.
$350.
257
00:10:58,135 --> 00:10:59,833
Six grand.
258
00:11:01,922 --> 00:11:04,185
It'’s okay. You keep it.
259
00:11:04,228 --> 00:11:05,708
What'’s that
supposed to mean?
260
00:11:05,752 --> 00:11:07,275
Means I don'’t need it.
261
00:11:07,318 --> 00:11:08,363
And we do?
262
00:11:08,406 --> 00:11:10,191
We do, Mom. We really do.
263
00:11:10,234 --> 00:11:12,497
Here. I got news
for you, little bro.
264
00:11:12,541 --> 00:11:14,456
You can keep your charity.
I have lived my whole life
265
00:11:14,499 --> 00:11:15,979
without any help
from that woman.
266
00:11:16,023 --> 00:11:17,677
I do not need a handout now!
267
00:11:19,287 --> 00:11:21,593
I am so sorry about that.
268
00:11:21,637 --> 00:11:24,161
For someone who wasn'’t
raised by my mother,
269
00:11:24,205 --> 00:11:26,468
she sure is a lot like her.
270
00:11:26,511 --> 00:11:28,731
Never, ever say that to her.
271
00:11:28,775 --> 00:11:32,474
Can you move your foot,
Uncle Ray? You'’re on a 50.
272
00:11:34,171 --> 00:11:36,086
Here. Let me help you
with that.
273
00:11:36,130 --> 00:11:38,001
Thanks.
274
00:11:38,045 --> 00:11:40,961
This'’ll really
help with tuition.
275
00:11:41,004 --> 00:11:42,614
Where'’d you
go to school?
276
00:11:42,658 --> 00:11:44,660
Cal. How about you?
277
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,009
Sonoma State.
278
00:11:46,053 --> 00:11:47,054
Good school?
279
00:11:47,097 --> 00:11:49,012
Ample parking.
280
00:11:50,797 --> 00:11:54,452
You sure you'’re okay with
us taking all of this?
281
00:11:54,496 --> 00:11:56,759
Yeah, I'’m sure.
282
00:11:56,803 --> 00:11:59,414
BONNIE:
And another thing!
Buckle up.
283
00:11:59,457 --> 00:12:01,068
I never even
finished high school,
284
00:12:01,111 --> 00:12:02,896
and she put you
through law school?!
285
00:12:02,939 --> 00:12:04,767
Iput me through law school.
286
00:12:04,811 --> 00:12:07,204
I put me through college,
I put me through everything.
287
00:12:07,248 --> 00:12:08,597
She gave me nothing.
288
00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:10,947
That'’s how I
feel about you.
289
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:15,299
Everything I accomplished
was in spite of her.
290
00:12:15,343 --> 00:12:17,867
Now I know you had it hard,
but believe me,
291
00:12:17,911 --> 00:12:19,956
it was no picnic
being raised by Shirley.
292
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,349
Abandoned.Black.
293
00:12:21,392 --> 00:12:24,831
Woman.Gay.
294
00:12:24,874 --> 00:12:27,094
I think he wins.
295
00:12:29,792 --> 00:12:32,229
My dad left, and every time
she looked at me,
296
00:12:32,273 --> 00:12:33,491
I was just a reminder.
297
00:12:33,535 --> 00:12:34,928
Oh, that'’s so sad.
298
00:12:34,971 --> 00:12:36,451
What about my story?
299
00:12:36,494 --> 00:12:39,628
It'’s sad, too. I've
just heard it a lot.
300
00:12:39,671 --> 00:12:41,064
You wish you had her.
301
00:12:41,108 --> 00:12:44,415
I couldn'’t wait
to get away from her.
302
00:12:44,459 --> 00:12:46,853
And now I want
to get away from you.
303
00:12:46,896 --> 00:12:49,290
Christy, I wish you
nothing but success.
304
00:12:49,333 --> 00:12:51,118
And she'’ll have it,
'’cause she had a mother
305
00:12:51,161 --> 00:12:52,815
who loved her
and took care of her!
306
00:12:52,859 --> 00:12:53,816
Really?
307
00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:55,600
Yeah, yeah.
He doesn'’t know.
308
00:13:01,606 --> 00:13:03,260
[sighs]
309
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:05,872
I am so sorry
I dragged you there.
310
00:13:05,915 --> 00:13:08,004
I thought you'’d get
closure with your mom,
311
00:13:08,048 --> 00:13:10,790
and now it'’s
just opener.
312
00:13:10,833 --> 00:13:12,835
More open?
313
00:13:12,879 --> 00:13:14,794
Oh, come on.
314
00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:17,840
Just give me a dirty look
so I know you still love me.
315
00:13:17,884 --> 00:13:18,972
It'’s not your fault.
316
00:13:19,015 --> 00:13:20,712
I know.
317
00:13:20,756 --> 00:13:24,151
I was just making noise
'’cause the radio doesn't work.
318
00:13:24,194 --> 00:13:25,979
This is my life.
319
00:13:26,022 --> 00:13:29,243
I get knocked around,
kicked in the teeth, and then,
320
00:13:29,286 --> 00:13:31,593
when I finally get good news,
like my mother'’s dead,
321
00:13:31,636 --> 00:13:33,682
boom, I get kicked
in the teeth again.
322
00:13:33,725 --> 00:13:35,727
That'’s a funny line.
323
00:13:35,771 --> 00:13:38,339
I'’m gonna steal it when you die.
324
00:13:38,382 --> 00:13:42,299
Enjoy it, '’cause I got
nothing else to leave you.
325
00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:45,172
Oh, stop feeling
sorry for yourself.
326
00:13:45,215 --> 00:13:47,261
Everybody'’s life is hard.
327
00:13:47,304 --> 00:13:48,784
Oh, not my long-lost brother.
328
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,742
He apparently
made something of himself.
329
00:13:50,786 --> 00:13:53,571
Hey, don'’t discount
what you'’ve achieved.
330
00:13:53,615 --> 00:13:57,445
I'’m 52 years old, and I manage
an apartment building.
331
00:13:57,488 --> 00:14:00,709
You'’re sticking
with 52, huh?
332
00:14:00,752 --> 00:14:02,624
There'’s the dirty look.
333
00:14:04,713 --> 00:14:07,237
Mom, we'’re all doing
the best we can.
334
00:14:07,281 --> 00:14:10,327
There'’s no point in comparing
yourself to other people.
335
00:14:10,371 --> 00:14:11,763
Thank you.
336
00:14:13,678 --> 00:14:15,855
Especially
a super successful attorney
337
00:14:15,898 --> 00:14:18,683
who overcame poverty
and racial prejudice.
338
00:14:20,424 --> 00:14:22,731
Oh, you do
still love me!
339
00:14:25,603 --> 00:14:28,171
I still can'’t believe
Bonnie has a brother.
340
00:14:28,215 --> 00:14:31,174
I know. It'’s like finding out
there was a Jerry Hitler.
341
00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:34,525
How'’s she handling it?
342
00:14:34,569 --> 00:14:35,918
You know her.
343
00:14:35,962 --> 00:14:37,137
Oh, you poor thing.
Sorry.
344
00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:38,790
Thanks.
345
00:14:38,834 --> 00:14:40,357
Is she coming
to the meeting?
346
00:14:40,401 --> 00:14:42,055
No. She'’s too busy
having a meeting
347
00:14:42,098 --> 00:14:43,970
with all the angry
voices in her head.
348
00:14:44,013 --> 00:14:47,582
Last count, there were seven,
and maybe a dog.
349
00:14:47,625 --> 00:14:49,236
Yeah, well, she needs to come.
350
00:14:49,279 --> 00:14:51,325
You tell her.Maybe I will.
351
00:14:51,368 --> 00:14:53,893
Just be sure to let her smell
your hand before you pet her.
352
00:14:57,722 --> 00:15:00,638
[dramatic orchestral theme music
playing over TV]
353
00:15:03,380 --> 00:15:05,339
TV ANNOUNCER:
As the Sun Sets.
354
00:15:05,382 --> 00:15:07,080
This portion
brought to you today
355
00:15:07,123 --> 00:15:09,473
by Brim Decaffeinated Coffee.
356
00:15:09,517 --> 00:15:13,173
Fill your cup to the rim
with the richness of Brim.
357
00:15:13,216 --> 00:15:15,697
And Lady Whisper Body Spray.
358
00:15:15,740 --> 00:15:19,309
Because... well... you know.
359
00:15:22,704 --> 00:15:24,619
[knocking on door]
360
00:15:27,013 --> 00:15:27,927
[sighs]
361
00:15:30,103 --> 00:15:31,974
[sighs]
What are you doing here?
362
00:15:32,018 --> 00:15:34,107
What are you doing here?Why aren'’t you at the meeting?
363
00:15:34,150 --> 00:15:36,152
I'’m not at the meeting 'cause
you'’re not at the meeting.
364
00:15:36,196 --> 00:15:38,720
You want to play 20 Questions,
or are you gonna invite me in?Fine.
365
00:15:38,763 --> 00:15:40,504
I just don'’t want
to talk about my mother.
366
00:15:40,548 --> 00:15:42,463
You got it.
367
00:15:44,378 --> 00:15:46,728
[sighs]
368
00:15:46,771 --> 00:15:49,818
You know, I had a dead
mom I was mad at, too.
369
00:15:51,776 --> 00:15:53,691
For God'’s sake.
370
00:15:53,735 --> 00:15:55,171
What? I'’m talking
about mymother.
371
00:15:55,215 --> 00:15:58,000
I see. So this is where
we make my problem about you.
372
00:15:58,044 --> 00:16:01,134
Oh, we'’ll get there.
373
00:16:01,177 --> 00:16:04,006
But since you brought it up,
what exactly is your problem?
374
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:05,529
Seriously?
375
00:16:05,573 --> 00:16:07,531
My mother threw me
into the foster system,
376
00:16:07,575 --> 00:16:09,098
but chose to raise a son.
377
00:16:09,142 --> 00:16:10,882
Okay. How is
that a problem?
378
00:16:10,926 --> 00:16:13,146
Are you trying to piss me off?
379
00:16:13,189 --> 00:16:14,451
I'’m just saying,
that'’s something
380
00:16:14,495 --> 00:16:15,800
that happened
a long time ago.
381
00:16:15,844 --> 00:16:17,759
It'’s only a problem now
if you make it one.
382
00:16:17,802 --> 00:16:20,370
[scoffs] I didn'’t think
I could hate that woman
383
00:16:20,414 --> 00:16:22,068
any more than I already did.
384
00:16:22,111 --> 00:16:25,114
Can I tell you something
Marjorie told me?
385
00:16:25,158 --> 00:16:26,594
Ugh. Let me guess.
386
00:16:26,637 --> 00:16:29,727
Pray? Go to a meeting?
Pray at a meeting?
387
00:16:29,771 --> 00:16:33,601
Do the hokey pokey,
turn yourself around?
388
00:16:33,644 --> 00:16:36,778
She told me to write my mother
a letter and tell her everything
389
00:16:36,821 --> 00:16:39,694
I didn'’t get a chance
to tell her when she was alive.
390
00:16:39,737 --> 00:16:41,783
And where would I mail
this letter?
391
00:16:41,826 --> 00:16:44,655
Do you happen to know
the zip code for hell?
392
00:16:48,268 --> 00:16:50,661
You go to her grave,
and you just read it.
393
00:16:50,705 --> 00:16:53,273
Wow. That'’s the stupidest thing
I'’ve ever heard.
394
00:16:53,316 --> 00:16:57,929
Yeah, well, I thought so,
too, but... it really helped.
395
00:16:57,973 --> 00:17:00,062
And I had a nice weekend
in South Carolina.
396
00:17:00,106 --> 00:17:02,325
Bought an antique samovar.
397
00:17:02,369 --> 00:17:04,110
I don'’t know what that is.
398
00:17:04,153 --> 00:17:05,850
Is that a person?
A sandwich?
399
00:17:05,894 --> 00:17:08,636
Make all the jokes you want,
400
00:17:08,679 --> 00:17:12,988
but instead of hating
my mom day in and day out,
401
00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:15,556
now the anger just
flares up occasionally.
402
00:17:15,599 --> 00:17:16,687
Like herpes?
403
00:17:18,385 --> 00:17:20,213
I wouldn'’t know.
404
00:17:20,256 --> 00:17:21,649
But yes.
405
00:17:28,308 --> 00:17:30,310
[sighs]
406
00:17:43,497 --> 00:17:46,239
Okay, let'’s do this.
407
00:17:46,282 --> 00:17:48,328
[sighs, sniffles]
408
00:17:48,371 --> 00:17:50,765
"Dear Mom,
409
00:17:50,808 --> 00:17:54,421
"I have hated you my whole life.
410
00:17:54,464 --> 00:17:59,426
"What kind of person
abandons a four-year-old child?
411
00:17:59,469 --> 00:18:02,690
"I wasn'’t a baby, you knew me.
412
00:18:02,733 --> 00:18:05,606
"We sang songs together.
413
00:18:05,649 --> 00:18:09,479
"And then I spent
the rest of my life thinking
414
00:18:09,523 --> 00:18:13,135
"I must'’ve done something wrong,
or you would have wanted me.
415
00:18:13,179 --> 00:18:17,052
"Do you know
what that does to a person?
416
00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:20,403
"I drank because of you.
417
00:18:20,447 --> 00:18:24,364
"I almost lost my child
because of you.
418
00:18:24,407 --> 00:18:27,193
"I went to jail because of you.
419
00:18:27,236 --> 00:18:29,456
[sniffles]
420
00:18:29,499 --> 00:18:33,895
Because of you, because of you,
because of you."
421
00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:43,296
[voice breaking]:
I can'’t keep doing this.
422
00:18:43,339 --> 00:18:48,127
You have been
the great excuse of my life.
423
00:18:48,170 --> 00:18:50,520
I blamed you for everything.
424
00:18:50,564 --> 00:18:52,435
It'’s all on you.
425
00:18:54,220 --> 00:18:57,440
God.
426
00:18:57,484 --> 00:19:00,095
I can'’t believe
I'’m gonna say this, but...
427
00:19:03,272 --> 00:19:05,622
...I'’m sorry.
428
00:19:11,976 --> 00:19:17,330
I don'’t like you--
I don'’t have to like you--
429
00:19:17,373 --> 00:19:20,071
but you'’re not responsible
for my life.
430
00:19:20,115 --> 00:19:22,161
I am responsible for my life.
431
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:28,210
There.
432
00:19:28,254 --> 00:19:30,604
You'’re off the hook.
433
00:19:33,694 --> 00:19:35,609
Rest in peace.
434
00:20:01,765 --> 00:20:04,159
[quietly]:
"Dear Mom, for as long
435
00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:06,248
"as I can remember, you
were never there for me.
436
00:20:06,292 --> 00:20:07,467
You let me down so..."
437
00:20:07,510 --> 00:20:08,685
What'’s going on?
438
00:20:08,729 --> 00:20:10,905
Shh. Lay down. Just go with it.
439
00:20:10,948 --> 00:20:13,647
What are you doing?
440
00:20:13,690 --> 00:20:15,605
I was inspired by what you did,
441
00:20:15,649 --> 00:20:18,173
and I realized I still have
so much anger towards you,
442
00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,262
I thought I should
get some of it out.
443
00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:23,483
Wait. You'’re doing
your dead mom letter now?
444
00:20:23,526 --> 00:20:26,442
Yeah. I was in the mood,
nothing on TV.
445
00:20:26,486 --> 00:20:29,184
Eh, knock yourself out.
446
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:32,274
It might help if you
crossed your arms.
447
00:20:32,318 --> 00:20:34,145
Like this?
448
00:20:34,189 --> 00:20:36,322
Perfect. And breathe shallow.
449
00:20:36,365 --> 00:20:38,541
[exhales heavily]
450
00:20:38,585 --> 00:20:41,501
Nice.
451
00:20:41,544 --> 00:20:44,155
"You let me down so many times,
452
00:20:44,199 --> 00:20:45,679
and I learned not
to trust..."
453
00:20:45,722 --> 00:20:48,290
Roar![screams] That'’s going
in the letter!
32780
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