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Deconstructing Harry (1997)
aka "Woody Allen Fall Project 1996"
Marc2008 (2009), The Netherlands.
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SUBRip by Cristo
cristo@konto.pl
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I could never
get those fires started.
4
00:01:55,740 --> 00:01:58,460
Dad, are you gonna have chicken?
You want meat?
5
00:01:58,500 --> 00:01:59,779
Chicken's fine.
6
00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:01,260
This is a brilliant article.
7
00:02:01,299 --> 00:02:02,259
Norman!
8
00:02:02,900 --> 00:02:04,660
Did you read
Ken's article on China?
9
00:02:04,699 --> 00:02:06,619
-No, I haven't.
-Terrific article.
10
00:02:06,659 --> 00:02:07,899
Where is Ken?
11
00:02:07,940 --> 00:02:10,619
In the house
watching the Yankee game.
12
00:02:10,660 --> 00:02:13,860
Your husband. Comes for a day
in the beautiful countryside...
13
00:02:13,899 --> 00:02:16,099
heads for the television set.
14
00:02:16,140 --> 00:02:17,980
Ken, come on, honey!
15
00:02:18,019 --> 00:02:20,540
How many people want chicken,
and how many want hamburgers?
16
00:02:20,580 --> 00:02:22,859
Two more outs! Three minutes!
17
00:02:22,900 --> 00:02:25,260
I think everybody's dying
for a little libation.
18
00:02:25,299 --> 00:02:27,659
Why don't you make
your famous Stoli martinis?
19
00:02:27,659 --> 00:02:30,700
Janet, when are you and Ken
gonna have a child?
20
00:02:30,740 --> 00:02:33,379
You've let your sister
have a big head start.
21
00:02:33,419 --> 00:02:35,940
Let Leslie practice viola
for six hours a day...
22
00:02:35,979 --> 00:02:37,540
then it's not so easy.
23
00:02:37,580 --> 00:02:39,259
Leave her alone.
24
00:02:47,219 --> 00:02:50,500
I came in here to make drinks
for everybody.
25
00:02:53,259 --> 00:02:54,939
What are you doing?
You want a drink?
26
00:02:56,620 --> 00:02:57,860
Sure.
27
00:03:05,260 --> 00:03:06,540
This is nuts.
28
00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:09,540
We gotta get out of here.
29
00:03:15,779 --> 00:03:17,060
Oh, God.
30
00:03:23,820 --> 00:03:25,060
We're gonna get caught.
31
00:03:25,099 --> 00:03:27,139
They're by the lake.
I can see everything.
32
00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:44,380
They're deep in conversation.
33
00:03:45,099 --> 00:03:46,339
Wait! There's Janet!
34
00:03:50,700 --> 00:03:51,780
Ken...
35
00:03:53,499 --> 00:03:56,499
You can't scare me like that.
I grind my teeth.
36
00:03:56,539 --> 00:03:58,660
Just don't scare me like that.
37
00:03:58,699 --> 00:04:00,339
It was nothing.
Just a false alarm.
38
00:04:00,379 --> 00:04:02,740
Try not to actually chew.
39
00:04:02,780 --> 00:04:05,940
Wouldn't it be great
if we could be alone together?
40
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:07,420
Just relaxed, you and me?
41
00:04:07,459 --> 00:04:08,859
It would be so great.
42
00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:10,300
That would be so great.
43
00:04:10,339 --> 00:04:12,819
Let's hang in. You never know
what's gonna happen.
44
00:04:12,859 --> 00:04:13,939
Come on. Open wide.
45
00:04:13,980 --> 00:04:18,420
Ken, turn the Yankee game off
and come on out here now!
46
00:04:18,459 --> 00:04:21,260
I will! Just one minute!
It's almost over!
47
00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:33,299
God. I'm done.
48
00:04:33,340 --> 00:04:35,380
You can come anytime you want.
49
00:04:35,420 --> 00:04:36,380
Can I?
50
00:04:38,540 --> 00:04:39,459
I'm ready!
51
00:04:41,180 --> 00:04:43,660
Leslie, is that you?
52
00:04:44,460 --> 00:04:46,859
Can you lead me
down to the lake?
53
00:04:46,859 --> 00:04:48,899
Can you give me just a minute,
Grandma?
54
00:04:48,940 --> 00:04:51,460
I'm just--I'm making martinis.
55
00:04:51,499 --> 00:04:53,060
Sure, dear.
56
00:04:53,100 --> 00:04:54,499
I want to finish.
57
00:04:54,539 --> 00:04:55,779
Oh, Ken?
58
00:04:55,820 --> 00:04:56,940
Is that you?
59
00:04:57,419 --> 00:04:58,619
Finish what?
60
00:05:01,259 --> 00:05:02,300
Come, Ken.
61
00:05:02,339 --> 00:05:03,660
Come?
62
00:05:03,699 --> 00:05:05,659
Come lead me down to the lake.
63
00:05:05,700 --> 00:05:10,059
Ever since I lost my second eye,
I feel so frail.
64
00:05:13,019 --> 00:05:14,900
You don't have to moan about it.
65
00:05:14,939 --> 00:05:16,980
It's not that terrible.
66
00:05:17,019 --> 00:05:18,939
Ken is hurrying, Grandma.
67
00:05:18,980 --> 00:05:21,539
Would you do the olives, Ken?
Quickly?
68
00:05:21,579 --> 00:05:24,060
Oh, you know,
you can use onions, too.
69
00:05:24,100 --> 00:05:26,260
I prefer onions, don't you, Ken?
70
00:05:29,740 --> 00:05:32,740
Boy, you must really love
onions.
71
00:05:36,300 --> 00:05:37,260
How much do I--
72
00:05:42,860 --> 00:05:43,939
Lucy?
73
00:05:43,980 --> 00:05:45,460
You schmuck! You bastard!
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00:05:45,500 --> 00:05:47,140
I'd like to cut your head off.
75
00:05:47,660 --> 00:05:49,060
You're upset, right?
76
00:05:49,379 --> 00:05:52,060
How could you? Didn't you know
what would happen?
77
00:05:52,100 --> 00:05:53,740
What?
78
00:05:53,779 --> 00:05:56,060
Don't answer me, prick.
79
00:05:56,099 --> 00:05:58,780
You knew.
You just didn't give a shit.
80
00:05:58,820 --> 00:06:01,700
Why don't you take
your coat off and just...
81
00:06:01,739 --> 00:06:03,580
How could you write that book?
82
00:06:03,620 --> 00:06:04,860
Are you so selfish?
83
00:06:04,899 --> 00:06:07,580
You're so self-engrossed
you don't care who you destroy?
84
00:06:07,619 --> 00:06:10,659
You told our whole story!
85
00:06:11,619 --> 00:06:13,900
All the details.
You gave me away to my sister.
86
00:06:13,939 --> 00:06:16,100
Marvin's left me. He's gone.
87
00:06:16,579 --> 00:06:19,100
It was loosely based on us.
88
00:06:19,139 --> 00:06:21,700
Don't bullshit me, motherfucker!
89
00:06:22,019 --> 00:06:23,579
Who do you think
you're talking to...
90
00:06:23,620 --> 00:06:25,700
one of those retarded
talk-show hosts?
91
00:06:27,460 --> 00:06:29,019
I lived through it with you.
92
00:06:29,059 --> 00:06:30,939
I know how loosely based it is.
93
00:06:30,979 --> 00:06:32,859
Hey, what are you telling me...
94
00:06:32,899 --> 00:06:36,019
that your blind grandmother
caught us fucking one day?
95
00:06:36,739 --> 00:06:38,180
No, No. Of course.
96
00:06:38,219 --> 00:06:40,539
You made a few
stupid exaggerations...
97
00:06:40,579 --> 00:06:44,099
or, as the critics say,
"inspired comic flights."
98
00:06:44,139 --> 00:06:46,220
But Jane recognized it.
99
00:06:46,260 --> 00:06:48,140
You'd have to be submental
not to.
100
00:06:48,180 --> 00:06:50,220
And Marvin was crushed!
101
00:06:50,260 --> 00:06:51,499
Jane suspected us.
102
00:06:51,539 --> 00:06:53,579
I can't tell you how long
Jane suspected us.
103
00:06:53,620 --> 00:06:55,499
I know! I denied it!
104
00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:56,940
And now you've gone...
105
00:06:56,980 --> 00:06:59,459
you've gone
and confirmed it all for her.
106
00:06:59,860 --> 00:07:03,140
Big fuckin' deal--
you made Leslie shorter.
107
00:07:03,179 --> 00:07:04,740
Big fuckin' deal!
108
00:07:04,780 --> 00:07:05,939
But it's all here.
109
00:07:06,540 --> 00:07:09,700
The poor schmuck country doctor,
the violinist...
110
00:07:09,739 --> 00:07:12,980
her younger sister
cheating with her husband.
111
00:07:13,459 --> 00:07:15,860
The picture window,
for Christ's sake!
112
00:07:16,459 --> 00:07:18,380
Cruel observations
about Marvin...
113
00:07:18,419 --> 00:07:20,420
with his barbecue
and chef's hat.
114
00:07:21,139 --> 00:07:22,379
And, of course, Jane...
115
00:07:22,419 --> 00:07:26,140
or, as you pathetically
disguise her...
116
00:07:26,619 --> 00:07:27,739
Janet.
117
00:07:28,660 --> 00:07:29,860
Here it is.
118
00:07:31,059 --> 00:07:33,899
"It was not simply that Leslie
had become numbed...
119
00:07:33,899 --> 00:07:36,020
"with the inane spate
of leaden perceptions...
120
00:07:36,060 --> 00:07:38,540
"that passed for wit
from Marvin.
121
00:07:38,579 --> 00:07:41,380
"It was not even the image
she shared with Ken...
122
00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:44,899
"of Marvin's flaccid,
microscopic member...
123
00:07:44,940 --> 00:07:47,140
"jiggling up and down
as he bounced naked...
124
00:07:47,180 --> 00:07:50,460
"across the icy floor
of their Connecticut home...
125
00:07:50,539 --> 00:07:52,100
"to close the storm windows.
126
00:07:52,620 --> 00:07:55,019
"It was that she
had never loved him...
127
00:07:55,339 --> 00:07:57,700
"but wanted to have children...
128
00:07:57,740 --> 00:07:59,780
"to retaliate against
her older sister...
129
00:07:59,819 --> 00:08:02,019
"who did not have
a maternal bone in her being...
130
00:08:02,059 --> 00:08:03,939
"and whose every inch,
Leslie felt...
131
00:08:03,979 --> 00:08:06,579
"was occupied
by gluttonous self-love.
132
00:08:06,620 --> 00:08:09,220
"Ken ran his hand over
Leslie's large round breasts...
133
00:08:09,260 --> 00:08:10,659
"and mounted her from the rear."
134
00:08:10,699 --> 00:08:12,739
Big fuckin' deal.
You gave her large breasts.
135
00:08:12,780 --> 00:08:14,180
Leslie, please--
136
00:08:14,219 --> 00:08:15,300
Lucy!
137
00:08:16,220 --> 00:08:19,100
I'm Lucy, motherfucker!
138
00:08:19,979 --> 00:08:22,339
Not Leslie.
139
00:08:24,099 --> 00:08:26,419
Except, of course,
I am Leslie...
140
00:08:26,459 --> 00:08:29,059
because you made no attempt
to disguise anything.
141
00:08:29,100 --> 00:08:30,460
You didn't give a fuck!
142
00:08:30,500 --> 00:08:32,739
You didn't care enough
to disguise anything!
143
00:08:32,779 --> 00:08:34,180
Please! Jesus!
144
00:08:34,220 --> 00:08:35,899
You pulled out two years ago.
145
00:08:35,939 --> 00:08:37,699
You broke my fuckin' heart.
146
00:08:37,740 --> 00:08:40,340
You left your wife and me...
147
00:08:40,380 --> 00:08:42,420
for some little cooze!
148
00:08:42,460 --> 00:08:43,940
Me and Janet!
149
00:08:44,380 --> 00:08:46,459
Jane. Janet is the character.
150
00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:50,140
Now, two years on...
151
00:08:50,620 --> 00:08:52,499
your latest magnum opus...
152
00:08:52,540 --> 00:08:56,219
emerges from this sewer
of an apartment...
153
00:08:56,260 --> 00:08:57,820
where you take
everyone's suffering...
154
00:08:57,859 --> 00:08:59,540
and turn it into gold.
155
00:08:59,580 --> 00:09:01,139
Literary gold.
156
00:09:01,179 --> 00:09:03,820
Everyone's misery.
You even cause them misery.
157
00:09:03,859 --> 00:09:06,460
Mix your alchemy
and make it into gold...
158
00:09:06,499 --> 00:09:08,659
like some fuckin'
black magician!
159
00:09:08,699 --> 00:09:09,779
Give me a break.
160
00:09:09,819 --> 00:09:12,020
I'm the one who wound up
in Bellevue.
161
00:09:12,060 --> 00:09:13,940
-You deserve it and worse.
-Lucy!
162
00:09:13,980 --> 00:09:15,139
You've ruined my life!
163
00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:16,820
I've come here
to blow my brains out!
164
00:09:16,860 --> 00:09:17,940
What's wrong with you?
165
00:09:17,980 --> 00:09:21,579
In front of you on your carpet
because you caused it.
166
00:09:21,620 --> 00:09:23,060
My fuckin' brains
on your carpet!
167
00:09:23,099 --> 00:09:24,980
You're so fucking unstable!
Will you relax?
168
00:09:25,019 --> 00:09:27,059
That's why you picked me.
169
00:09:27,099 --> 00:09:28,979
That's what turns you on
about me--
170
00:09:29,019 --> 00:09:30,099
Jane's crazy sister.
171
00:09:30,140 --> 00:09:32,340
Calm down.
You're not gonna kill yourself.
172
00:09:33,020 --> 00:09:35,060
No, you're not,
because it's not in you.
173
00:09:35,100 --> 00:09:37,940
You're not the dramatic type.
You never were.
174
00:09:37,980 --> 00:09:39,859
Jane is the dramatic sister.
175
00:09:39,900 --> 00:09:41,980
Jane is the solo violinist.
176
00:09:43,860 --> 00:09:45,940
Relax. For Christ's sake.
177
00:09:47,580 --> 00:09:48,700
You're right.
178
00:09:50,980 --> 00:09:53,340
I don't have the nerve
to kill myself.
179
00:09:55,619 --> 00:09:57,980
I knew it as I came over here.
180
00:09:59,419 --> 00:10:02,619
I said, no, not me.
181
00:10:05,260 --> 00:10:06,380
Better...
182
00:10:07,259 --> 00:10:08,700
to kill him.
183
00:10:09,699 --> 00:10:11,140
Pardon me?
184
00:10:11,180 --> 00:10:13,380
Kill the black magician...
185
00:10:13,419 --> 00:10:17,100
so he can't spin any more gold
out of human misery.
186
00:10:17,139 --> 00:10:18,700
What's wrong with you?
187
00:10:18,740 --> 00:10:20,620
-Shut up!
-Put it down!
188
00:10:20,660 --> 00:10:21,900
You're so fuckin' verbal!
189
00:10:21,939 --> 00:10:24,659
Who else could have talked me
into giving him a blow job...
190
00:10:24,699 --> 00:10:26,299
at my father's funeral?
191
00:10:26,339 --> 00:10:27,100
Lucy, think it over.
192
00:10:30,780 --> 00:10:31,939
You stop right there!
193
00:10:31,979 --> 00:10:34,019
Don't shoot!
Don't pull the trigger.
194
00:10:34,060 --> 00:10:37,340
Look, If it makes you happy,
my life has been going badly.
195
00:10:37,380 --> 00:10:39,140
I've been miserable.
My girl left me.
196
00:10:39,180 --> 00:10:40,820
She went off
with a close friend of mine.
197
00:10:41,740 --> 00:10:43,219
Insomnia. I've got herpes.
198
00:10:43,260 --> 00:10:44,660
I've squandered
everything I have
199
00:10:44,699 --> 00:10:47,500
on shrinks and lawyers
and whores.
200
00:10:47,540 --> 00:10:48,740
...fatigue syndrome.
201
00:10:48,780 --> 00:10:51,620
I'm not gonna stand up here
on this fucking roof...
202
00:10:51,660 --> 00:10:54,620
with a world-class
meshugana cunt...
203
00:10:54,660 --> 00:10:55,620
and beg for my life.
204
00:10:55,659 --> 00:10:57,100
If you want to, shoot me.
205
00:10:57,100 --> 00:10:58,500
I was working. You interrupted.
206
00:10:58,539 --> 00:11:00,820
So whose life
were you exploiting today?
207
00:11:00,859 --> 00:11:02,019
You'll be very happy--
208
00:11:02,060 --> 00:11:04,780
I was working on
an autobiographical thing...
209
00:11:04,820 --> 00:11:06,619
about when I was first married.
210
00:11:08,299 --> 00:11:10,339
Harvey Stern married too young--
211
00:11:10,379 --> 00:11:12,259
mainly to get out
of his parents' apartment...
212
00:11:12,299 --> 00:11:14,260
which was
a rent-controlled cornucopia...
213
00:11:14,299 --> 00:11:17,739
of guilt, antagonism,
and soul-deadening criticism.
214
00:11:17,779 --> 00:11:20,619
By day, he labored listlessly
in a shoe store.
215
00:11:20,659 --> 00:11:24,140
By night, he glowed intensely
over his Remington portable.
216
00:11:24,700 --> 00:11:26,419
Are you coming to bed?
217
00:11:27,659 --> 00:11:30,460
Rosalee, I'm in the middle
of a sentence...
218
00:11:30,499 --> 00:11:34,180
I'm feeling rejected because
we never sleep together anymore.
219
00:11:34,219 --> 00:11:37,099
I don't know what it is.
I'm just not attracted to her.
220
00:11:37,140 --> 00:11:38,619
Is she doing something
to put you off?
221
00:11:38,700 --> 00:11:40,699
It's my fault, too.
222
00:11:40,740 --> 00:11:43,900
And I lie. I tell her
I'm too wrapped up in work...
223
00:11:43,939 --> 00:11:45,339
but the opposite is true.
224
00:11:45,380 --> 00:11:48,219
I'm hyper-sexually aroused,
just not for her.
225
00:11:48,300 --> 00:11:50,699
-Who for?
-Anyone else.
226
00:11:50,740 --> 00:11:53,340
She has a sister.
I'm dying to fuck her.
227
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,339
A doll. Thick lips.
228
00:11:55,380 --> 00:11:57,860
Her friend from Columbia.
Jennifer? I dream of her.
229
00:11:57,900 --> 00:12:00,019
I never thought I could care
about African history...
230
00:12:00,060 --> 00:12:01,539
but she's spellbinding.
231
00:12:01,580 --> 00:12:04,259
The truth is,
I never meet or see a woman...
232
00:12:04,300 --> 00:12:07,139
that I don't wonder what it
would be like in bed with her.
233
00:12:10,979 --> 00:12:12,379
I met a great hooker.
234
00:12:13,059 --> 00:12:14,299
A hooker?
235
00:12:14,340 --> 00:12:15,740
Yeah. Beautiful.
236
00:12:15,779 --> 00:12:17,340
From China.
237
00:12:17,380 --> 00:12:19,739
Unbelievable body.
238
00:12:19,779 --> 00:12:23,540
Schooled by tradition
in the art of pleasing men.
239
00:12:23,579 --> 00:12:25,020
It's 50 clams.
240
00:12:25,819 --> 00:12:27,940
Wouldn't you be cheating
on your wife?
241
00:12:27,979 --> 00:12:30,540
It's not cheating.
She's a hooker.
242
00:12:30,579 --> 00:12:32,659
It's not like
I'm having a love affair.
243
00:12:33,140 --> 00:12:35,499
You don't feel
for a professional girl...
244
00:12:35,539 --> 00:12:37,339
the way you do for your wife.
245
00:12:37,380 --> 00:12:39,619
She comes over,
rubs on her oils...
246
00:12:39,659 --> 00:12:40,820
Oils?
247
00:12:41,299 --> 00:12:43,980
Into the sack,
she takes you to the moon.
248
00:12:44,019 --> 00:12:46,580
You lay half a C-note on her,
and she's history.
249
00:12:47,540 --> 00:12:49,219
Where would you do it?
250
00:12:49,259 --> 00:12:51,859
I couldn't have her come
to my apartment.
251
00:12:51,900 --> 00:12:53,020
Get a hotel room.
252
00:12:53,059 --> 00:12:55,139
That's what I do
when the wife's home.
253
00:12:57,859 --> 00:13:00,659
I don't have that kind of dough.
Fifty's a lot in itself.
254
00:13:00,700 --> 00:13:03,180
Maybe a friend
will let you use his place.
255
00:13:03,219 --> 00:13:06,220
Kid, you're always bitchin'
about your sex life.
256
00:13:06,259 --> 00:13:07,540
I'm trying to help.
257
00:13:08,979 --> 00:13:11,020
I tell her
you gave me the number?
258
00:13:11,059 --> 00:13:13,219
No, no. Not my name.
259
00:13:13,259 --> 00:13:14,980
Don't use your real name.
260
00:13:15,019 --> 00:13:16,659
No, of course.
Not the real name.
261
00:13:16,699 --> 00:13:19,139
Tell you what you do.
You borrow a friend's apartment.
262
00:13:19,179 --> 00:13:22,100
You use his name.
That way, it'll be on the bell.
263
00:13:23,580 --> 00:13:25,500
Now good fortune
smiled on Harvey...
264
00:13:25,540 --> 00:13:28,100
as one of his closest friends,
Mendel Birnbaum...
265
00:13:28,140 --> 00:13:29,540
was hit by a car...
266
00:13:29,579 --> 00:13:31,860
and lay hovering
between life and death...
267
00:13:31,899 --> 00:13:33,259
at New York hospital...
268
00:13:33,299 --> 00:13:37,379
thus freeing up an apartment
for Harvey's tryst.
269
00:13:37,419 --> 00:13:39,780
Donning the other man's
silk robe...
270
00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:42,219
Harvey became the swinger
Mendel Birnbaum...
271
00:13:42,260 --> 00:13:46,820
and awaited his Oriental
passport to paradise.
272
00:13:46,859 --> 00:13:49,219
You must be Mendel Birnbaum.
273
00:14:09,099 --> 00:14:11,259
Did you enjoy it?
274
00:14:11,299 --> 00:14:12,980
Are you kidding?
I'll be right back.
275
00:14:13,020 --> 00:14:14,179
Where you going?
276
00:14:14,220 --> 00:14:17,059
I'm gonna see
if I can find another 50.
277
00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:18,500
I'd like to go again.
278
00:14:36,820 --> 00:14:38,740
Open.
279
00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:40,459
Who is it?
280
00:14:45,500 --> 00:14:47,020
Who are you?
281
00:14:47,059 --> 00:14:49,500
I've come for you.
282
00:14:49,539 --> 00:14:50,820
What are you talking about?
283
00:14:50,860 --> 00:14:55,979
I'm Death,
and your name is on my list.
284
00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:58,940
No, no, no. Wait a minute.
You've made a mistake.
285
00:14:59,019 --> 00:15:01,179
You don't have a minute.
286
00:15:01,219 --> 00:15:02,579
I'm not Mendel Birnb--
287
00:15:02,620 --> 00:15:05,380
Don't give me that bullshit!
288
00:15:05,419 --> 00:15:07,259
Look at your monogram.
289
00:15:07,300 --> 00:15:10,060
Mendel, who are you talking to?
290
00:15:10,099 --> 00:15:11,379
Stop calling me Mendel.
291
00:15:11,420 --> 00:15:12,660
I'm just using his pad.
292
00:15:12,699 --> 00:15:13,780
Right.
293
00:15:13,819 --> 00:15:16,380
They always have an excuse.
294
00:15:16,419 --> 00:15:17,499
Let's go.
295
00:15:17,539 --> 00:15:20,019
Move it, you little putz.
296
00:15:20,780 --> 00:15:23,620
I'm standing on the roof,
and she's pointing a gun at me.
297
00:15:23,660 --> 00:15:26,060
We're out in the cold,
and I'm panicked.
298
00:15:26,060 --> 00:15:29,019
I'm telling her about a story
I wrote when I was younger...
299
00:15:29,059 --> 00:15:30,819
and she found it funny,
thank God.
300
00:15:30,860 --> 00:15:33,019
She laughed.
301
00:15:33,060 --> 00:15:35,300
She relaxed a little.
She put the gun down.
302
00:15:35,339 --> 00:15:36,699
And you know.
303
00:15:36,739 --> 00:15:38,779
So your writing saved your life.
304
00:15:38,820 --> 00:15:41,139
It's amazing to me.
305
00:15:41,180 --> 00:15:43,220
The interesting thing to me...
306
00:15:43,260 --> 00:15:45,219
apart from the obvious
sexual guilt...
307
00:15:45,259 --> 00:15:48,259
that I had when I was
a young man in the story...
308
00:15:48,300 --> 00:15:50,459
is that nothing's changed.
309
00:15:50,500 --> 00:15:52,260
It's years later.
310
00:15:52,300 --> 00:15:54,419
I had a shrink then,
I have a shrink now.
311
00:15:54,460 --> 00:15:55,899
I'm 6 shrinks later.
312
00:15:55,980 --> 00:15:57,859
I'm 3 wives down the line...
313
00:15:57,900 --> 00:16:00,619
and I still can't get
my love life in order.
314
00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:03,140
I still love whores.
315
00:16:05,980 --> 00:16:08,340
To me, the ideal thing
is you pay them...
316
00:16:08,379 --> 00:16:09,980
and they come over
to the house...
317
00:16:10,020 --> 00:16:12,980
and you don't have to discuss
Proust or films or--
318
00:16:14,059 --> 00:16:15,460
I don't know
what's been happening to me.
319
00:16:17,700 --> 00:16:20,899
You know,
I just have not grown up...
320
00:16:20,940 --> 00:16:23,460
and I feel, you know,
it's not...
321
00:16:23,499 --> 00:16:25,819
I see other guys my age.
322
00:16:25,859 --> 00:16:28,380
I'm always thinking of fucking
every woman I meet.
323
00:16:28,419 --> 00:16:31,739
I meet a woman, a stranger,
a woman on the bus...
324
00:16:31,780 --> 00:16:33,659
I think, what would she
look like naked?
325
00:16:33,700 --> 00:16:35,579
Is it possible I can fuck her?
326
00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:37,179
This is crazy.
327
00:16:37,219 --> 00:16:40,379
I see guys I know
that are lawyers and doctors.
328
00:16:40,420 --> 00:16:41,579
They have families and houses.
329
00:16:41,619 --> 00:16:43,499
They're not so...
330
00:16:43,539 --> 00:16:45,739
Does the President
of the United States...
331
00:16:45,780 --> 00:16:47,020
want to fuck every woman he met.
332
00:16:48,700 --> 00:16:50,140
Bad example.
333
00:16:50,180 --> 00:16:52,459
But I don't know.
334
00:16:52,500 --> 00:16:54,300
Take Raoul Wallenberg.
335
00:16:54,339 --> 00:16:57,180
Did he want to bang every
cocktail waitress in Europe?
336
00:16:57,219 --> 00:16:58,980
Probably not, but...
337
00:16:59,019 --> 00:17:01,099
Tell me about
your honoring ceremony tomorrow.
338
00:17:01,140 --> 00:17:03,139
Oh, that's bullshit.
339
00:17:03,180 --> 00:17:07,099
It's ironic that the same school
that threw me out years ago...
340
00:17:07,139 --> 00:17:08,700
now wants to honor me.
341
00:17:08,739 --> 00:17:10,340
Why'd they throw you out?
342
00:17:10,379 --> 00:17:13,380
Because I was not interested
in college.
343
00:17:13,419 --> 00:17:14,899
I wanted to be a writer.
344
00:17:14,939 --> 00:17:16,540
That's all I cared about
was writing.
345
00:17:16,579 --> 00:17:18,700
I did not care
about the real world.
346
00:17:18,740 --> 00:17:21,539
I cared
only about the world of fiction.
347
00:17:21,580 --> 00:17:24,740
And, plus, I tried to give
the dean's wife an enema...
348
00:17:24,779 --> 00:17:26,859
so they didn't take
kindly to that.
349
00:17:26,900 --> 00:17:29,219
But the sad thing is...
350
00:17:29,260 --> 00:17:32,619
I gotta drive upstate
to be honored...
351
00:17:32,660 --> 00:17:34,340
and I have to go by myself.
352
00:17:34,379 --> 00:17:35,779
I got nobody to go with.
353
00:17:35,820 --> 00:17:38,259
It's, you know, I--
OK, so--
354
00:17:38,300 --> 00:17:41,019
And--
You know, I can't--
355
00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:43,100
What about bringing your son up
with you?
356
00:17:43,140 --> 00:17:45,379
It's not my visiting time
with him.
357
00:17:45,420 --> 00:17:47,419
And Joan
is completely inflexible.
358
00:17:47,459 --> 00:17:49,820
She won't trade dates with you?
359
00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:51,819
I can't even
get her on the phone.
360
00:17:51,859 --> 00:17:54,419
She hates me.
361
00:17:54,459 --> 00:17:55,860
I don't know. Lately...
362
00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:59,140
For the first time in my life,
I experienced writer's block.
363
00:17:59,180 --> 00:18:01,380
This, to me, is unheard of.
364
00:18:01,419 --> 00:18:04,739
I start these short stories,
and I can't finish them.
365
00:18:04,780 --> 00:18:07,940
I can't get into my novel
at all...
366
00:18:07,980 --> 00:18:09,700
because I took an advance.
367
00:18:11,179 --> 00:18:13,219
I don't know.
368
00:18:13,260 --> 00:18:17,380
I find that I'm taking
more pills and medicine and...
369
00:18:17,420 --> 00:18:19,220
You remind me
of that short story...
370
00:18:19,259 --> 00:18:21,859
you were working on
maybe two months ago--
371
00:18:21,899 --> 00:18:23,099
The Actor.
372
00:18:24,459 --> 00:18:26,259
This goddamn lens
has something wrong with it.
373
00:18:26,300 --> 00:18:27,820
This one, too?
I changed lenses.
374
00:18:27,860 --> 00:18:29,900
The focus is off.
375
00:18:29,939 --> 00:18:31,619
I don't know why.
376
00:18:31,660 --> 00:18:33,539
It's out of focus.
377
00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:35,019
All the lenses can't be soft.
378
00:18:35,059 --> 00:18:36,500
Let's move it along.
379
00:18:36,539 --> 00:18:38,179
It's getting late.
Let's move it.
380
00:18:38,219 --> 00:18:40,740
I'm trying to shoot Mel,
and he's soft.
381
00:18:40,779 --> 00:18:42,699
Where are you renting
these lenses?
382
00:18:42,739 --> 00:18:44,059
The lenses are fine.
383
00:18:45,100 --> 00:18:46,539
Holy shit. Mel's out of focus.
384
00:18:46,579 --> 00:18:47,899
That's what I said, genius.
385
00:18:47,939 --> 00:18:50,060
I don't mean the lens.
Mel himself.
386
00:18:50,099 --> 00:18:51,540
Let me see.
387
00:18:51,580 --> 00:18:54,020
You're right.
Mel's out of focus.
388
00:18:54,060 --> 00:18:55,780
What are you talking about?
389
00:18:55,820 --> 00:18:57,900
The actor's out of focus.
390
00:18:57,939 --> 00:18:59,179
How can this be?
391
00:18:59,220 --> 00:19:00,579
Is there something wrong?
392
00:19:00,620 --> 00:19:01,820
Mel, come here.
393
00:19:01,860 --> 00:19:05,020
I don't know
how to tell you this.
394
00:19:05,059 --> 00:19:06,220
You're soft.
395
00:19:06,260 --> 00:19:07,979
I've gained a little weight.
396
00:19:08,020 --> 00:19:09,859
It's not that. You're soft.
397
00:19:09,899 --> 00:19:11,939
You're out of focus.
398
00:19:11,980 --> 00:19:13,220
I don't know why.
399
00:19:13,260 --> 00:19:14,819
Is there anything we can do?
400
00:19:14,860 --> 00:19:16,699
I can't adjust this.
401
00:19:16,739 --> 00:19:18,580
Just look at yourself.
402
00:19:18,620 --> 00:19:20,540
There's nothing to do.
403
00:19:20,579 --> 00:19:22,460
You sure you're OK?
404
00:19:22,540 --> 00:19:24,819
It's fuzzy.
405
00:19:24,860 --> 00:19:26,059
I feel fine.
406
00:19:26,100 --> 00:19:27,579
Mel's out of focus.
407
00:19:27,660 --> 00:19:29,140
He's soft.
408
00:19:29,180 --> 00:19:30,820
I don't know what to do.
409
00:19:30,859 --> 00:19:32,420
It's almost 4:00 anyway.
410
00:19:32,460 --> 00:19:34,019
Why don't we just wrap?
411
00:19:34,060 --> 00:19:36,260
We'll wrap
and see what happens.
412
00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:40,899
I want you to go home and rest.
413
00:19:40,940 --> 00:19:42,939
See if you can sharpen up.
414
00:19:48,900 --> 00:19:50,260
Grace, I'm home.
415
00:19:52,460 --> 00:19:54,419
Hey. What's the matter?
416
00:19:54,459 --> 00:19:56,379
You look strange.
417
00:19:56,420 --> 00:19:58,019
I'm out of focus.
418
00:19:58,060 --> 00:20:02,299
Yeah, you are.
Just a little bit.
419
00:20:02,379 --> 00:20:03,460
And you look pale.
420
00:20:03,499 --> 00:20:05,220
Daddy, you're all blurry.
421
00:20:05,259 --> 00:20:07,300
Maybe you should lie down.
422
00:20:07,339 --> 00:20:09,500
Daddy's out of focus!
423
00:20:09,539 --> 00:20:11,299
Daddy doesn't need that, OK?
424
00:20:11,339 --> 00:20:13,060
You be nice.
425
00:20:13,099 --> 00:20:15,299
What happened at work?
426
00:20:15,340 --> 00:20:16,819
Daddy's out of focus!
427
00:20:16,860 --> 00:20:18,100
Rueben! Stop it!
428
00:20:18,140 --> 00:20:22,380
They thought it was the camera.
Then...it was me.
429
00:20:22,419 --> 00:20:24,180
They sent me home.
It's so humiliating.
430
00:20:24,219 --> 00:20:27,060
Did you eat anything strange
at lunch? Any shellfish?
431
00:20:27,099 --> 00:20:30,099
This isn't an allergic reaction.
I don't know what it is.
432
00:20:30,139 --> 00:20:32,419
I just need to get
a good night's sleep.
433
00:20:32,459 --> 00:20:33,699
I'll be OK.
434
00:20:33,740 --> 00:20:34,899
I'm sure that's all it is.
435
00:20:34,939 --> 00:20:36,220
What happened to you?
436
00:20:36,259 --> 00:20:40,580
You get a good night's sleep,
and tomorrow you'll be fine.
437
00:20:40,620 --> 00:20:44,020
The following morning, however,
things did not improve.
438
00:20:44,060 --> 00:20:46,340
In fact, the situation
had gotten worse.
439
00:20:46,380 --> 00:20:48,940
Mel was more out of focus
than ever.
440
00:20:48,980 --> 00:20:50,180
I gotta get to the doctor.
441
00:20:52,179 --> 00:20:54,419
I've never seen anything
like this.
442
00:20:54,460 --> 00:20:57,659
Nothing's is wrong with you,
except you're out of focus.
443
00:20:57,699 --> 00:20:59,780
What's the matter?
444
00:20:59,820 --> 00:21:02,059
It's from looking at Mel,
I'm seasick.
445
00:21:02,099 --> 00:21:04,379
That's why I want everyone
to try these.
446
00:21:06,500 --> 00:21:08,099
I don't want to wear glasses.
447
00:21:08,139 --> 00:21:10,340
Wait. Let's see.
448
00:21:10,380 --> 00:21:12,659
Put 'em on
so you can see me, son.
449
00:21:12,700 --> 00:21:14,060
This is much better.
450
00:21:14,100 --> 00:21:15,700
You'll be able to see me.
451
00:21:15,740 --> 00:21:17,459
Put those on.
Daddy'll be sharper.
452
00:21:17,500 --> 00:21:19,420
Don't you want to see Daddy?
453
00:21:19,460 --> 00:21:21,539
Put those on,
and we won't get headaches.
454
00:21:21,579 --> 00:21:25,700
Despite the fact that children
don't want to wear glasses...
455
00:21:25,740 --> 00:21:27,140
they're forced to.
456
00:21:28,139 --> 00:21:32,259
You expect the world to adjust
to the distortion you've become.
457
00:21:32,300 --> 00:21:33,940
I don't expect anything.
458
00:21:33,980 --> 00:21:36,980
I'm going through something--
I don't know what.
459
00:21:37,019 --> 00:21:40,700
For the first time in my life,
I can't seem to write.
460
00:21:40,739 --> 00:21:41,940
It's not coming.
461
00:21:41,979 --> 00:21:43,939
And for me...
462
00:21:43,980 --> 00:21:46,499
all I have in life
is my imagination.
463
00:21:46,539 --> 00:21:48,660
I'm sorry. Our time is up.
464
00:21:48,699 --> 00:21:50,860
Have a good time
at the honoring ceremony.
465
00:21:50,899 --> 00:21:53,060
I think it would be good
for you and your son...
466
00:21:53,099 --> 00:21:55,100
if you brought him along.
467
00:21:57,219 --> 00:21:59,259
Joan, you never
return my phone calls.
468
00:21:59,299 --> 00:22:01,380
Oh, leave me alone.
469
00:22:01,420 --> 00:22:03,259
Do you want me to call
the police?
470
00:22:03,300 --> 00:22:04,860
I've got to ask you
one question.
471
00:22:04,899 --> 00:22:06,780
I don't want to listen to you.
472
00:22:06,860 --> 00:22:09,579
Tomorrow they're honoring me
at Adair, my old university.
473
00:22:09,620 --> 00:22:10,819
I want to take Hilly.
474
00:22:10,860 --> 00:22:12,100
He has school tomorrow.
475
00:22:12,139 --> 00:22:14,020
I want to trade
one visitation day.
476
00:22:14,059 --> 00:22:15,299
I have plans with Hilly.
477
00:22:15,339 --> 00:22:16,579
It'll be good to see.
478
00:22:16,620 --> 00:22:18,499
The kid will see
his father honored.
479
00:22:18,540 --> 00:22:20,740
I don't want him to see you!
480
00:22:20,779 --> 00:22:23,740
He'll have a day in the country.
Will you stop for one second?
481
00:22:23,780 --> 00:22:26,139
A day in the country.
What is so bad?
482
00:22:26,179 --> 00:22:27,539
He is nine years old.
483
00:22:27,580 --> 00:22:30,900
Where does he learn phrases like
"banging beaver" and "fuck God?"
484
00:22:30,939 --> 00:22:32,260
What, from me?
485
00:22:32,299 --> 00:22:33,859
What do I look like,
an imbecile?
486
00:22:33,900 --> 00:22:36,220
I know what your conversations
are like with him...
487
00:22:36,260 --> 00:22:38,700
and don't think I didn't hear
about Open School Week.
488
00:22:38,740 --> 00:22:41,340
Beth Kramer has never been
so appalled in her entire life!
489
00:22:41,379 --> 00:22:44,419
Dad, why doesn't my penis
look like yours?
490
00:22:45,059 --> 00:22:47,259
Why doesn't your penis
look like mine?
491
00:22:47,299 --> 00:22:51,300
Because your mother and I
never had you circumcised.
492
00:22:51,740 --> 00:22:53,820
When I was your age,
every kid in my neighborhood--
493
00:22:53,859 --> 00:22:57,019
you know what they used to do?
They'd name their penises.
494
00:22:57,060 --> 00:22:58,620
I'm going to name mine
Dillinger.
495
00:22:58,659 --> 00:23:00,459
Dillinger is perfect!
496
00:23:00,500 --> 00:23:01,900
Dillinger is great!
497
00:23:01,939 --> 00:23:03,619
Hilly, you're inspired.
You're a genius.
498
00:23:03,660 --> 00:23:06,859
Dillinger was one of the great
geniuses of his profession.
499
00:23:06,899 --> 00:23:08,460
Like Willy Sutton.
500
00:23:08,500 --> 00:23:10,660
Remember when we discussed
Freud once?
501
00:23:10,699 --> 00:23:14,060
Freud said the 2 most important
things to having a good life...
502
00:23:14,100 --> 00:23:16,940
are the work that you choose
and sex.
503
00:23:16,980 --> 00:23:18,539
Those are the 2 things.
504
00:23:18,579 --> 00:23:20,660
Women are God.
505
00:23:20,700 --> 00:23:21,900
God's a woman?
506
00:23:21,940 --> 00:23:24,140
I'm not saying God's a woman.
507
00:23:24,179 --> 00:23:25,860
There are women.
508
00:23:25,900 --> 00:23:28,419
We don't know if there's a God,
but there are women...
509
00:23:28,460 --> 00:23:31,620
not in some imaginary heaven,
but right here on earth.
510
00:23:31,660 --> 00:23:36,460
And some of them, Hilly,
shop at Victoria's Secret.
511
00:23:36,499 --> 00:23:40,260
Beth Kramer has never been
so mortified in her life.
512
00:23:40,300 --> 00:23:43,619
Beth Kramer's an aggressive,
tight-assed, busybody cunt...
513
00:23:43,659 --> 00:23:46,539
and it's none of her business
how I speak to my son.
514
00:23:46,580 --> 00:23:48,900
Beth Kramer is a decent parent
and a great friend.
515
00:23:48,940 --> 00:23:50,060
Oh, Bullshit.
516
00:23:50,099 --> 00:23:52,299
I'm asking you to change
one visitation day.
517
00:23:52,340 --> 00:23:53,659
What is so terrible?
518
00:23:53,700 --> 00:23:56,220
He is not gonna miss
a day of school.
519
00:23:56,259 --> 00:23:57,740
What if he was sick?
520
00:23:57,779 --> 00:24:00,020
He would miss school.
521
00:24:00,060 --> 00:24:01,660
But he is not sick...
522
00:24:01,700 --> 00:24:03,900
and he's not gonna
spend the afternoon...
523
00:24:03,939 --> 00:24:06,340
with his pill-popping,
alcoholic...
524
00:24:06,380 --> 00:24:09,220
beaver-banging excuse
for a father.
525
00:24:09,260 --> 00:24:11,460
Years ago,
you didn't say that about me.
526
00:24:11,499 --> 00:24:12,579
You didn't think that.
527
00:24:12,619 --> 00:24:14,340
You were a nice, loose,
easygoing spirit.
528
00:24:14,379 --> 00:24:15,619
Put it in a book!
529
00:24:15,660 --> 00:24:17,699
What am I saying?
You already did.
530
00:24:18,580 --> 00:24:21,499
Epstein had married
his third shrink.
531
00:24:21,580 --> 00:24:24,340
He had confessed his feelings
toward her several times...
532
00:24:24,379 --> 00:24:26,940
and it seemed she had put it
down to transference...
533
00:24:26,979 --> 00:24:29,420
but one day, she surprised him.
534
00:24:29,459 --> 00:24:31,180
I think it best...
535
00:24:31,219 --> 00:24:33,380
that we terminate
your treatment.
536
00:24:34,379 --> 00:24:36,100
And then I think...
537
00:24:36,140 --> 00:24:39,940
we should give it
a substantial period of time...
538
00:24:39,980 --> 00:24:42,300
and then if we both feel
the same way...
539
00:24:42,339 --> 00:24:45,420
I think we can begin
to see each other again...
540
00:24:45,460 --> 00:24:46,940
socially.
541
00:24:48,939 --> 00:24:52,460
It was, to Epstein's thinking,
a match made in heaven.
542
00:24:52,499 --> 00:24:55,900
Here, at last, was a woman
who understood him.
543
00:24:55,939 --> 00:24:59,899
You know all my secrets,
every nuance of my psychic life.
544
00:24:59,939 --> 00:25:02,860
There isn't a feeling or desire
that I haven't admitted to you.
545
00:25:02,899 --> 00:25:05,220
Now it's your turn
to explore me.
546
00:25:05,259 --> 00:25:07,699
But all my perversions,
you accept them.
547
00:25:07,739 --> 00:25:10,579
My need to be tied up,
to watch you with other women...
548
00:25:10,619 --> 00:25:13,020
to feel your spike heels
in my mouth.
549
00:25:13,059 --> 00:25:15,180
No one can say
that I didn't know...
550
00:25:15,220 --> 00:25:17,140
what I was
letting myself in for.
551
00:25:19,340 --> 00:25:21,859
The first 2 years were amazing.
552
00:25:21,900 --> 00:25:24,299
They moved into a large
Westend Avenue apartment.
553
00:25:24,339 --> 00:25:26,420
He wrote. She saw patients.
554
00:25:26,460 --> 00:25:29,740
But her clearest insights
were into his work.
555
00:25:29,780 --> 00:25:31,299
What one comes away with...
556
00:25:31,339 --> 00:25:34,020
is your total isolation,
your fear of people...
557
00:25:34,059 --> 00:25:36,060
your panic over closeness...
558
00:25:36,139 --> 00:25:38,899
and that's why your real life
is so chaotic...
559
00:25:38,940 --> 00:25:42,340
and your writing is so much
more controlled and stable.
560
00:25:42,380 --> 00:25:43,939
You're unable to--
561
00:25:43,980 --> 00:25:45,900
Yes, it all went quite well...
562
00:25:45,940 --> 00:25:48,459
until Helen became pregnant
and gave birth.
563
00:25:48,499 --> 00:25:49,979
From that moment on...
564
00:25:50,060 --> 00:25:52,820
as if she had experienced
a divine revelation...
565
00:25:52,859 --> 00:25:56,179
she suddenly became what
Epstein referred to angrily...
566
00:25:56,220 --> 00:25:58,339
as "Jewish with a vengeance."
567
00:25:58,380 --> 00:26:02,940
I rue the day I listened to you
and didn't have him circumcised.
568
00:26:02,979 --> 00:26:04,420
What are you, nuts?
569
00:26:04,460 --> 00:26:06,019
We can still do it.
570
00:26:06,060 --> 00:26:07,699
No. He's too old.
571
00:26:07,740 --> 00:26:09,339
What is wrong with you?
572
00:26:09,380 --> 00:26:11,259
Now he's too old.
573
00:26:11,340 --> 00:26:13,220
You're like
a born-again Christian...
574
00:26:13,260 --> 00:26:14,580
except you're a Jew.
575
00:26:14,620 --> 00:26:17,379
I see my father's face
in Hillel.
576
00:26:17,419 --> 00:26:18,980
Hilliard.
577
00:26:19,020 --> 00:26:20,699
His name is Hilliard.
578
00:26:20,740 --> 00:26:22,339
We didn't name him Hillel.
579
00:26:22,379 --> 00:26:24,379
We didn't name him
after some rabbi.
580
00:26:24,419 --> 00:26:25,619
It's Hilliard Epstein.
581
00:26:25,659 --> 00:26:27,460
No, I'm sick
of your smug cynicism.
582
00:26:27,500 --> 00:26:29,059
There's value in tradition.
583
00:26:29,099 --> 00:26:30,699
I never thought
it would mean anything...
584
00:26:30,739 --> 00:26:32,659
but now that I'm a mother,
it does.
585
00:26:32,700 --> 00:26:36,339
I see not only meaning
in Judaism, but true beauty.
586
00:26:36,380 --> 00:26:38,020
Helen, you're a scientist.
587
00:26:38,060 --> 00:26:39,779
Einstein was a scientist...
588
00:26:39,820 --> 00:26:42,300
and a he was a Jew,
and he was religious.
589
00:26:42,340 --> 00:26:46,339
Helen had taken on
the obligation of daily prayers.
590
00:26:46,379 --> 00:26:47,620
Jews, of course...
591
00:26:47,660 --> 00:26:50,020
fearing a wrathful
and vengeful God...
592
00:26:50,059 --> 00:26:52,539
give praise and thanks
for everything.
593
00:27:08,739 --> 00:27:09,539
...blow job.
594
00:27:10,700 --> 00:27:13,580
Then one day,
the inevitable happened.
595
00:27:13,619 --> 00:27:15,500
A patient of Helen's,
an Israeli...
596
00:27:15,539 --> 00:27:17,700
who had come to her
in a depressed state...
597
00:27:17,739 --> 00:27:19,780
over his wife having left him...
598
00:27:19,819 --> 00:27:21,899
captured Helen's heart.
599
00:27:21,940 --> 00:27:23,939
I think we should
terminate your treatment...
600
00:27:23,980 --> 00:27:27,339
and give it a substantial
period of time...
601
00:27:27,379 --> 00:27:29,060
and then if we both
still feel the same way...
602
00:27:29,100 --> 00:27:32,739
then I think we could start
to see each other socially.
603
00:27:40,099 --> 00:27:41,300
Richard.
604
00:27:41,339 --> 00:27:42,900
...lost in thought.
605
00:27:42,940 --> 00:27:45,899
I was thinking about a book
I wrote.
606
00:27:45,940 --> 00:27:48,099
-I'm a mess.
-What's the matter?
607
00:27:48,140 --> 00:27:49,979
I'm on my way to the doctor's.
608
00:27:50,019 --> 00:27:51,899
I'm having severe pains
in my chest.
609
00:27:51,939 --> 00:27:53,539
That's nothing.
610
00:27:53,579 --> 00:27:56,940
That's indigestion, gallbladder,
ulcer, or acid reflux.
611
00:27:56,979 --> 00:27:58,180
I've got a family history.
612
00:27:58,219 --> 00:27:59,380
My father
died of a heart attack...
613
00:27:59,420 --> 00:28:01,340
my mother dropped dead
of a massive coronary...
614
00:28:01,420 --> 00:28:04,659
and both my brothers were dead
before 50 from heart failure.
615
00:28:05,619 --> 00:28:07,500
I don't know
why you're wasting time.
616
00:28:07,539 --> 00:28:08,939
You should get an ambulance.
617
00:28:08,980 --> 00:28:11,620
-Are you busy?
-I was gonna see my editor.
618
00:28:11,659 --> 00:28:13,780
I hate going
for these tests alone.
619
00:28:13,820 --> 00:28:17,299
My mother died
giving birth to me...
620
00:28:17,340 --> 00:28:19,700
for which my father
never forgave me.
621
00:28:19,739 --> 00:28:23,540
Funny. I wish before he died
I had forgiven him.
622
00:28:23,579 --> 00:28:27,179
We're morbid, 'cause you think
you're dying, but you're not.
623
00:28:27,220 --> 00:28:29,540
Today, they got lasers,
all kinds of things.
624
00:28:29,580 --> 00:28:31,579
You and science, right?
625
00:28:31,659 --> 00:28:33,579
There's nothing wrong
with science.
626
00:28:33,619 --> 00:28:35,580
Between air conditioning
and the pope...
627
00:28:35,659 --> 00:28:37,059
I'll take air conditioning.
628
00:28:37,100 --> 00:28:38,780
I'm scared. Really scared.
629
00:28:38,819 --> 00:28:41,579
Can we change the subject?
630
00:28:41,620 --> 00:28:43,059
I have writer's block.
631
00:28:44,500 --> 00:28:46,099
For the first time in my life...
632
00:28:46,140 --> 00:28:48,380
I can't come up
with a meaningful idea...
633
00:28:48,419 --> 00:28:49,700
something that holds
my interest.
634
00:28:49,740 --> 00:28:52,500
Since Fay left you,
you've been having trouble.
635
00:28:52,539 --> 00:28:54,820
I'm seeing Fay later.
I'm having a drink with Fay.
636
00:28:54,859 --> 00:28:56,180
That's very good.
637
00:28:56,219 --> 00:28:58,059
She's good for you.
638
00:28:58,100 --> 00:28:59,779
She's a lot better...
639
00:28:59,819 --> 00:29:02,699
than a lot of those
other crazies that you--
640
00:29:02,740 --> 00:29:04,260
Ow. My God, my arm.
641
00:29:04,300 --> 00:29:06,659
I'm telling you, it's nothing.
642
00:29:08,100 --> 00:29:10,099
I'm not scared.
643
00:29:10,140 --> 00:29:12,740
You're in great shape.
644
00:29:12,780 --> 00:29:15,299
You have a little bursitis
in your arm, but...
645
00:29:15,339 --> 00:29:16,580
Oh, that's fantastic.
646
00:29:16,620 --> 00:29:18,500
What do I always say?
647
00:29:18,540 --> 00:29:20,139
The most beautiful words
in the English language...
648
00:29:20,180 --> 00:29:22,620
are not "I love you,
but "it's benign."
649
00:29:22,660 --> 00:29:25,500
We could do more tests,
but I don't think so.
650
00:29:25,540 --> 00:29:27,899
-This is fantastic.
-Your heart's in great shape.
651
00:29:27,939 --> 00:29:29,220
While I'm here...
652
00:29:29,260 --> 00:29:31,659
I hurt my back a few weeks ago,
opening a subzero refrigerator.
653
00:29:31,700 --> 00:29:32,780
Let me schedule you.
654
00:29:32,820 --> 00:29:34,899
Let me buy you a cup of coffee.
655
00:29:34,939 --> 00:29:36,019
I don't have time.
656
00:29:36,060 --> 00:29:37,539
What are you doing tomorrow?
657
00:29:37,580 --> 00:29:39,220
I'm busy. Why?
658
00:29:39,260 --> 00:29:42,059
I'm going to my old university.
They're honoring me.
659
00:29:42,100 --> 00:29:44,060
I'm looking for company
to come with me.
660
00:29:44,099 --> 00:29:48,740
I don't think I can get out
of this thing, but that's great.
661
00:29:48,779 --> 00:29:50,500
Congratulations.
662
00:30:06,820 --> 00:30:08,419
So you look great.
663
00:30:08,460 --> 00:30:10,859
Thank you.
You look a little tired.
664
00:30:10,900 --> 00:30:14,380
'Cause I'm struggling
with this book.
665
00:30:14,419 --> 00:30:17,339
Naturally,
I spent the advance already.
666
00:30:17,380 --> 00:30:20,019
I'm having a tough time.
667
00:30:20,059 --> 00:30:23,179
The reason that I wanted
to have this drink was--
668
00:30:23,219 --> 00:30:27,299
Can I get a red wine,
exact same thing that she has?
669
00:30:27,339 --> 00:30:29,740
I wanted to be the first
to tell you...
670
00:30:29,779 --> 00:30:31,419
that I'm getting married.
671
00:30:31,459 --> 00:30:33,260
Oh, don't say that.
672
00:30:33,300 --> 00:30:35,939
-Why?
-What do you mean, why?
673
00:30:35,979 --> 00:30:38,620
Because I love you.
674
00:30:38,660 --> 00:30:41,299
How can you get married?
675
00:30:41,339 --> 00:30:42,580
Who? is it Larry?
676
00:30:42,620 --> 00:30:43,619
Yes, it's Larry.
677
00:30:43,659 --> 00:30:46,700
I knew that.
I don't fucking believe this.
678
00:30:46,740 --> 00:30:49,340
This guy's allegedly
a friend of mine.
679
00:30:50,460 --> 00:30:51,540
He's the devil.
680
00:30:51,579 --> 00:30:52,979
I should never
have introduced you.
681
00:30:53,020 --> 00:30:55,419
When Larry's around,
I smell burning sulfur.
682
00:30:56,620 --> 00:30:59,579
Can we have your blessing?
Can I have it?
683
00:31:00,580 --> 00:31:02,060
You don't have my blessing.
684
00:31:02,100 --> 00:31:04,020
I don't want you to get married.
685
00:31:04,059 --> 00:31:05,859
I don't want you to.
686
00:31:06,220 --> 00:31:07,180
I should go.
687
00:31:07,219 --> 00:31:08,499
I was your pupil.
688
00:31:08,540 --> 00:31:11,260
It was Henry Higgins
and Eliza Doolittle.
689
00:31:11,300 --> 00:31:13,620
That's what it was,
and that's what you loved.
690
00:31:13,659 --> 00:31:16,699
But it didn't work that way.
What do you want me to say?
691
00:31:16,740 --> 00:31:18,540
Why did you
fall in love with me?
692
00:31:18,580 --> 00:31:23,180
You gave me those lectures
on love in the Western world.
693
00:31:23,220 --> 00:31:26,340
I didn't think I could.
I thought I was too damaged.
694
00:31:26,380 --> 00:31:28,379
But it's not...
695
00:31:28,420 --> 00:31:29,699
I woke up one morning...
696
00:31:29,739 --> 00:31:32,059
and I looked at you
over breakfast...
697
00:31:32,100 --> 00:31:36,660
and I thought to myself,
"God, this is what they mean.
698
00:31:36,699 --> 00:31:38,820
"This is what
they're talking about."
699
00:31:38,860 --> 00:31:40,620
Those warnings about how
I wasn't supposed...
700
00:31:40,660 --> 00:31:42,219
to fall in love with you.
701
00:31:42,260 --> 00:31:44,099
But then I fell in love
with you.
702
00:31:44,139 --> 00:31:46,260
...another jerk fan.
703
00:31:46,299 --> 00:31:49,380
That I would fuck you
and move on to the next fan.
704
00:31:49,420 --> 00:31:51,300
But it didn't happen that way.
705
00:31:51,340 --> 00:31:55,340
You were a fan and a follower...
706
00:31:55,379 --> 00:31:59,180
and then a pupil,
and then you were a roommate.
707
00:31:59,219 --> 00:32:01,539
And before I knew it...
708
00:32:01,579 --> 00:32:04,660
you were the one who had control
of the channel changer.
709
00:32:10,380 --> 00:32:12,020
I loved you.
710
00:32:12,060 --> 00:32:14,019
I was in awe of you.
711
00:32:14,059 --> 00:32:17,500
But I wasn't in love with you.
712
00:32:17,540 --> 00:32:19,340
...to my old university.
713
00:32:19,379 --> 00:32:21,699
They're honoring me,
if you can believe that.
714
00:32:21,739 --> 00:32:23,939
Give me a chance
to talk you out of it.
715
00:32:23,980 --> 00:32:25,539
Spend one day with me.
716
00:32:25,579 --> 00:32:27,899
I'm getting married tomorrow.
717
00:32:27,940 --> 00:32:30,219
Tomorrow you're getting married?
718
00:32:30,260 --> 00:32:31,619
The day I'm honored--
719
00:32:31,660 --> 00:32:33,180
I can't fucking believe this.
720
00:32:33,259 --> 00:32:34,499
You're getting married tomorrow?
721
00:32:34,540 --> 00:32:37,300
Yes. It's been planned
for months.
722
00:32:37,339 --> 00:32:38,660
Don't do it!
723
00:32:44,619 --> 00:32:47,099
While Goldberg was asleep
one night...
724
00:32:47,140 --> 00:32:49,259
the devil
entered his apartment...
725
00:32:49,299 --> 00:32:51,219
and abducted
his beautiful blond love...
726
00:32:51,260 --> 00:32:53,139
and carried her off to hell.
727
00:32:53,180 --> 00:32:54,980
The following morning...
728
00:32:55,019 --> 00:32:58,260
Goldberg noticed the odd smell
of burning sulfur.
729
00:33:04,020 --> 00:33:05,739
Harry Block?
730
00:33:05,780 --> 00:33:06,979
You're Cookie?
731
00:33:07,020 --> 00:33:08,379
Cookie Williams.
732
00:33:08,420 --> 00:33:10,099
You wanted me here at 10:00?
733
00:33:10,180 --> 00:33:11,300
Yeah. Jesus.
734
00:33:16,900 --> 00:33:18,779
Shall we get to it?
735
00:33:19,660 --> 00:33:21,860
You don't want to talk
a little first?
736
00:33:21,899 --> 00:33:23,780
Talk? Why?
737
00:33:24,419 --> 00:33:27,380
Really? Most guys don't like
to just jump right into bed...
738
00:33:27,419 --> 00:33:28,659
without a little talking.
739
00:33:28,700 --> 00:33:30,340
They think
it's too businesslike.
740
00:33:30,340 --> 00:33:31,539
Oh, not me.
741
00:33:31,580 --> 00:33:32,899
...tie me up.
742
00:33:32,940 --> 00:33:34,220
Whatever you want.
743
00:33:34,259 --> 00:33:36,299
Let's get the monetary part
out of the way.
744
00:33:36,339 --> 00:33:37,459
Then we can relax.
745
00:33:37,500 --> 00:33:38,700
Absolutely. You get 200?
746
00:33:38,740 --> 00:33:40,100
That's right.
747
00:33:40,139 --> 00:33:42,219
You want me to tie you up?
748
00:33:42,259 --> 00:33:46,219
Tie me up, hit me a little bit,
and give me a blow job.
749
00:33:46,260 --> 00:33:48,300
A blow job, then hit you.
750
00:33:48,340 --> 00:33:52,219
No. Hit me, then the blow job.
I want to get the order right.
751
00:33:52,259 --> 00:33:53,420
Otherwise, it's no fun.
752
00:33:53,459 --> 00:33:55,620
Tie me up, hit me, blow job.
753
00:33:55,659 --> 00:33:57,579
What do you want me
to tie you with?
754
00:33:57,619 --> 00:34:00,820
Well, truth is, I thought
you were gonna wear stockings.
755
00:34:00,859 --> 00:34:02,980
Cookie,
you're a definite artist.
756
00:34:03,020 --> 00:34:05,379
They should put your lips
in the Smithsonian.
757
00:34:05,419 --> 00:34:07,140
It took you a long time.
758
00:34:07,179 --> 00:34:08,859
I didn't think you'd make it.
759
00:34:08,900 --> 00:34:11,620
I was having a problem focusing.
760
00:34:11,620 --> 00:34:13,460
Finally,
I got the right fantasy.
761
00:34:13,499 --> 00:34:16,860
I thought of a woman
I saw on Sixth Avenue today...
762
00:34:16,899 --> 00:34:19,460
and I coupled her
with Svetlana Stalin.
763
00:34:19,500 --> 00:34:21,299
It's the daughter
of the dictator.
764
00:34:21,339 --> 00:34:22,620
It worked for me.
765
00:34:22,659 --> 00:34:24,059
What do you take medicine for?
766
00:34:25,139 --> 00:34:26,860
Me? Depression.
767
00:34:26,900 --> 00:34:28,859
What are you depressed about?
768
00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:30,740
Depressed.
Don't you ever get depressed?
769
00:34:30,779 --> 00:34:33,659
Doesn't your work
ever get you down?
770
00:34:33,700 --> 00:34:35,739
It's OK. Beats the hell
out of waitressing.
771
00:34:36,419 --> 00:34:40,939
Every hooker I ever speak to
tells me it beats waitressing.
772
00:34:40,980 --> 00:34:43,780
Waitressing's got to be
the worst job in the world.
773
00:34:43,819 --> 00:34:44,980
It's unbelievable.
774
00:34:45,019 --> 00:34:47,259
What are you sad about?
775
00:34:47,300 --> 00:34:50,259
I'm spiritually bankrupt.
I'm empty.
776
00:34:50,300 --> 00:34:51,700
What do you mean?
777
00:34:51,739 --> 00:34:53,220
I'm frightened.
778
00:34:53,259 --> 00:34:56,179
I got no soul.
You know what I mean?
779
00:34:56,220 --> 00:34:57,539
Let me put it this way.
780
00:34:57,580 --> 00:34:58,659
When I was younger...
781
00:34:58,700 --> 00:35:00,900
it was less scary
waiting for Lefty...
782
00:35:00,900 --> 00:35:02,499
than it is waiting for Godot.
783
00:35:03,019 --> 00:35:04,419
Aw, you lost me.
784
00:35:05,660 --> 00:35:08,180
You know that the universe
is coming apart?
785
00:35:08,219 --> 00:35:11,099
You know what a black hole is?
786
00:35:11,139 --> 00:35:13,019
Yeah.
That's how I make my living.
787
00:35:13,380 --> 00:35:15,300
You know, I gotta tell you,
Cookie....
788
00:35:15,300 --> 00:35:17,299
a great writer
named Sophocles...
789
00:35:17,340 --> 00:35:20,340
said that it was probably
best not to be born at all.
790
00:35:20,380 --> 00:35:22,140
Honey,
it's a little too late for that.
791
00:35:22,980 --> 00:35:24,460
I fought it.
792
00:35:24,500 --> 00:35:26,820
I didn't want out.
They had to come and get me.
793
00:35:28,060 --> 00:35:29,660
You want another blow job?
794
00:35:30,780 --> 00:35:31,979
How come?
795
00:35:32,020 --> 00:35:33,820
It's on the house.
No charge.
796
00:35:33,859 --> 00:35:36,580
'Cause them pills you taking
sure ain't working.
797
00:35:37,220 --> 00:35:39,460
I'm just in a peculiar mood
tonight...
798
00:35:39,499 --> 00:35:42,379
'cause I had
some bad news today.
799
00:35:42,420 --> 00:35:45,019
Let me ask you a question.
What are you doing tomorrow?
800
00:35:45,779 --> 00:35:46,779
Hustlin'.
801
00:35:48,180 --> 00:35:49,499
Why don't you come with me?
802
00:35:49,539 --> 00:35:50,739
Where?
803
00:35:50,779 --> 00:35:54,100
I'm going up to my old school
'cause they're gonna honor me.
804
00:35:54,140 --> 00:35:55,900
I got nobody to share it with.
805
00:35:56,219 --> 00:35:58,419
I'm serious. Come with me.
806
00:35:58,459 --> 00:36:00,739
I'll give you 500 bucks
for the day.
807
00:36:00,779 --> 00:36:02,979
Sleep here tonight,
come up with me tomorrow.
808
00:36:02,979 --> 00:36:04,540
How come you got all this money?
809
00:36:04,619 --> 00:36:06,580
I always keep
hooker money around...
810
00:36:06,620 --> 00:36:08,660
'cause I once paid
by check years ago...
811
00:36:08,699 --> 00:36:10,140
and the IRS killed me.
812
00:36:22,139 --> 00:36:26,340
Fay, when you get this message,
if it's not too late...
813
00:36:26,379 --> 00:36:28,780
I don't want you
to get married...
814
00:36:28,820 --> 00:36:33,019
because I love you,
and I want to marry you.
815
00:36:33,060 --> 00:36:34,180
You...
816
00:36:34,860 --> 00:36:38,459
I was looking at my last book...
817
00:36:38,499 --> 00:36:40,379
the part where we met...
818
00:36:40,419 --> 00:36:44,420
and I tried to exaggerate it
to make it funny...
819
00:36:44,460 --> 00:36:47,379
but it was actually
very romantic.
820
00:36:49,739 --> 00:36:51,140
She can't hear.
821
00:36:51,180 --> 00:36:53,060
I'm in town to see Les Mis.
822
00:36:53,100 --> 00:36:54,340
I have a free hour.
823
00:36:54,379 --> 00:36:57,019
I don't know if I can.
824
00:36:57,060 --> 00:36:58,939
I got our usual place
at the Wyndham.
825
00:36:58,980 --> 00:37:00,579
It's been almost two weeks.
826
00:37:00,579 --> 00:37:03,419
We'll have to make it fast.
827
00:37:03,459 --> 00:37:05,420
I can't make it believable
for so long.
828
00:37:10,019 --> 00:37:11,539
You'll be back in an hour.
829
00:37:11,580 --> 00:37:14,579
I have to be done
by then anyway.
830
00:37:17,419 --> 00:37:19,140
Think I'll take a walk.
831
00:37:19,140 --> 00:37:20,739
Now?
832
00:37:20,780 --> 00:37:25,060
'Cause I thought
that I would just...
833
00:37:25,099 --> 00:37:27,900
just to get some fresh air.
834
00:37:57,940 --> 00:37:59,419
Excuse me.
835
00:37:59,460 --> 00:38:01,420
Are you Harry Block?
836
00:38:03,300 --> 00:38:05,820
Your writing has been
so meaningful to me.
837
00:38:05,859 --> 00:38:07,700
Thank you very much.
838
00:38:07,740 --> 00:38:09,660
Can't believe
I'm in the elevator with you.
839
00:38:09,699 --> 00:38:11,739
It's no big deal.
840
00:38:11,779 --> 00:38:13,580
Are you staying here?
841
00:38:13,620 --> 00:38:16,340
I'm meeting someone.
842
00:38:24,460 --> 00:38:26,819
Oh, my God.
843
00:38:26,859 --> 00:38:28,540
What is this?
844
00:38:28,580 --> 00:38:30,699
It's stuck again.
845
00:38:30,740 --> 00:38:32,540
If this was one of my stories...
846
00:38:32,579 --> 00:38:34,939
this elevator would get
stuck between floors...
847
00:38:34,980 --> 00:38:38,020
and the two of us would start
a major affair and fall in love.
848
00:38:48,619 --> 00:38:51,499
Promise me
you won't fall in love with me.
849
00:38:52,940 --> 00:38:55,379
Definitely not.
Not a good idea.
850
00:38:55,420 --> 00:38:56,619
Why?
851
00:38:56,660 --> 00:39:01,139
Because I'm too screwed up.
852
00:39:01,180 --> 00:39:05,379
I have too many quirks.
853
00:39:08,099 --> 00:39:09,980
I have trouble being faithful.
854
00:39:10,019 --> 00:39:13,820
I have too many phobias
and craziness.
855
00:39:13,899 --> 00:39:17,059
But I fell in love with you
before I met you...
856
00:39:17,100 --> 00:39:19,140
when I read you.
857
00:39:19,180 --> 00:39:21,220
But you fell in love
with my work.
858
00:39:21,260 --> 00:39:23,140
That's a different thing.
859
00:39:24,019 --> 00:39:27,899
I love your work,
your imagination.
860
00:39:27,940 --> 00:39:31,620
But this is not a book.
861
00:39:31,620 --> 00:39:33,219
You know what I mean?
862
00:39:33,219 --> 00:39:36,539
We're not characters
in a fictional thing.
863
00:39:37,859 --> 00:39:39,460
So don't fall in love.
864
00:39:39,500 --> 00:39:40,739
Kiss me.
865
00:39:40,779 --> 00:39:43,899
Promise you won't
fall in love with me.
866
00:39:43,939 --> 00:39:45,060
I promise.
867
00:40:05,420 --> 00:40:06,939
The subway took forever.
I'm sorry.
868
00:40:06,979 --> 00:40:09,819
You said you weren't coming.
869
00:40:09,859 --> 00:40:11,339
We said 10:00.
870
00:40:11,379 --> 00:40:13,259
I'm sure that's what we said.
871
00:40:13,299 --> 00:40:15,739
I called you last night.
872
00:40:15,780 --> 00:40:16,979
When did you call me?
873
00:40:17,020 --> 00:40:18,860
I called you at 9:30 last night.
874
00:40:18,899 --> 00:40:20,979
You were writing--
875
00:40:21,020 --> 00:40:22,380
We spoke on the phone?
876
00:40:22,420 --> 00:40:24,139
Of course.
877
00:40:24,180 --> 00:40:26,059
My mind has been playing tricks.
878
00:40:26,100 --> 00:40:27,780
This is Cookie.
This is Richard.
879
00:40:27,819 --> 00:40:29,140
How are you?
880
00:40:29,179 --> 00:40:30,979
What's so special
about this honor?
881
00:40:30,979 --> 00:40:33,900
The man is being honored
by the school that expelled him.
882
00:40:33,940 --> 00:40:36,380
If only Hilly could see me--
he'd be so proud.
883
00:40:36,420 --> 00:40:38,020
I know, and it's sad...
884
00:40:38,020 --> 00:40:39,459
but short of kidnapping,
he ain't coming.
885
00:40:44,139 --> 00:40:46,660
-This is ridiculous.
-Don't worry.
886
00:40:46,700 --> 00:40:48,499
You're going to get in trouble.
887
00:40:48,539 --> 00:40:49,980
Come on, boys.
888
00:40:51,939 --> 00:40:53,579
Dad? What is it?
889
00:40:53,619 --> 00:40:55,659
We're not going to school today.
890
00:40:55,700 --> 00:40:57,579
What are you doing? Stop it!
891
00:40:57,620 --> 00:40:58,780
It's an emergency.
892
00:40:58,819 --> 00:41:00,619
What are you doing? Come on.
893
00:41:00,660 --> 00:41:02,779
You! Stop it!
894
00:41:02,819 --> 00:41:04,220
You can't do this!
895
00:41:04,260 --> 00:41:05,659
Get out of the car!
896
00:41:08,019 --> 00:41:09,379
Somebody stop this man!
897
00:41:09,420 --> 00:41:10,579
He's a deviant!
898
00:41:10,619 --> 00:41:13,980
Somebody stop him !
Somebody call the police!
899
00:41:14,019 --> 00:41:15,460
When the red, red robin...
900
00:41:15,500 --> 00:41:17,380
comes bob, bob, bobbin' along.
901
00:41:17,380 --> 00:41:19,340
-Go faster.
902
00:41:19,379 --> 00:41:23,259
There'll be no more sobbin'
when he starts throbbin' his...
903
00:41:23,300 --> 00:41:24,500
old sweet song.
904
00:41:24,540 --> 00:41:27,420
Wake up, wake up,
you sleepyhead.
905
00:41:27,459 --> 00:41:29,979
Get up, get up, get out of bed.
906
00:41:30,020 --> 00:41:32,579
Cheer up, cheer up,
the sun is red.
907
00:41:32,620 --> 00:41:35,220
Live, love, laugh, and be happy.
908
00:41:40,099 --> 00:41:41,300
It's fabulous here.
909
00:41:41,339 --> 00:41:42,819
It's beautiful. I love it.
910
00:41:42,859 --> 00:41:44,300
A Ferris wheel.
911
00:41:44,339 --> 00:41:45,579
Look at the swings.
912
00:41:45,619 --> 00:41:46,979
Want to go?
913
00:41:53,860 --> 00:41:55,019
Very good.
914
00:41:59,459 --> 00:42:01,099
High-five.
915
00:42:06,500 --> 00:42:08,300
I am going to smoke this joint.
Want some?
916
00:42:08,339 --> 00:42:10,579
I can't stand that stuff.
917
00:42:10,620 --> 00:42:12,660
See that place there?
918
00:42:12,700 --> 00:42:14,939
That Red Apple Rest?
919
00:42:14,980 --> 00:42:18,820
Years ago,
my then-wife Jane and I...
920
00:42:18,860 --> 00:42:21,139
were coming from Connecticut--
her sister's house--
921
00:42:21,180 --> 00:42:23,059
and we had this awful fight.
922
00:42:23,100 --> 00:42:24,259
She was having her period.
923
00:42:24,299 --> 00:42:26,380
We stopped there
to get water for her Midol.
924
00:42:26,420 --> 00:42:28,060
I don't want a child.
925
00:42:28,099 --> 00:42:30,660
Don't bring it up, especially
in front of my parents.
926
00:42:30,699 --> 00:42:32,219
I don't understand you.
927
00:42:32,260 --> 00:42:33,979
We've discussed it.
928
00:42:34,019 --> 00:42:36,179
-Don't I get a vote?
-You have a child.
929
00:42:36,219 --> 00:42:37,660
Who I never get to see.
930
00:42:37,699 --> 00:42:38,900
That's not my fault.
931
00:42:38,939 --> 00:42:40,459
I like being a father.
932
00:42:40,500 --> 00:42:42,219
I chose a different life
than Lucy.
933
00:42:42,259 --> 00:42:43,459
You knew that.
934
00:42:43,459 --> 00:42:44,699
You're dedicated to work.
935
00:42:44,740 --> 00:42:46,140
That means we can't
have children.
936
00:42:46,180 --> 00:42:48,100
Since when are you a family man?
937
00:42:48,100 --> 00:42:50,980
Don't think I don't see you
staring at Lucy.
938
00:42:51,019 --> 00:42:52,259
What?
939
00:42:52,259 --> 00:42:53,660
Don't play ignorant.
940
00:42:53,700 --> 00:42:55,539
You watch her walk, sit.
941
00:42:55,580 --> 00:42:58,500
You can't keep your eyes
off her toes.
942
00:42:58,539 --> 00:42:59,860
Are you nuts?
943
00:42:59,899 --> 00:43:01,220
What are you suggesting?
944
00:43:01,260 --> 00:43:02,939
I wouldn't put it past you...
945
00:43:02,979 --> 00:43:05,380
if you weren't dying
to have a thing with her.
946
00:43:05,419 --> 00:43:08,100
She's a neurotic,
suburban hausfrau.
947
00:43:08,139 --> 00:43:10,619
I have no interest in her.
948
00:43:10,659 --> 00:43:13,580
Your level of denial is intense.
949
00:43:13,619 --> 00:43:16,659
You're suffering from
a premenstrual nuclear meltdown.
950
00:43:17,540 --> 00:43:18,979
You want a hit?
951
00:43:21,299 --> 00:43:23,020
That smoke is killing me.
952
00:43:24,179 --> 00:43:25,940
I'm going to the bathroom.
953
00:43:25,979 --> 00:43:27,420
I'll catch you later.
954
00:43:40,740 --> 00:43:42,979
Cold fish, your third ex-wife.
955
00:43:43,019 --> 00:43:45,339
She never would have made
a good mother.
956
00:43:45,380 --> 00:43:47,219
Who are you?
957
00:43:47,259 --> 00:43:48,700
It's me--Ken.
958
00:43:51,779 --> 00:43:52,899
Look at this guy.
959
00:43:52,899 --> 00:43:55,779
You created me.
Now you don't recognize me?
960
00:43:55,820 --> 00:43:58,300
I'm a little high
because of her smoke.
961
00:43:58,339 --> 00:44:00,380
How'd you hook up with Jane?
962
00:44:00,419 --> 00:44:01,580
Jane was fine.
963
00:44:01,620 --> 00:44:04,379
Jane was having her period,
so she was irritable.
964
00:44:04,419 --> 00:44:06,179
It wasn't just her period.
965
00:44:06,220 --> 00:44:08,899
She was a cold, selfish woman.
966
00:44:08,899 --> 00:44:10,100
She's so self-involved...
967
00:44:10,139 --> 00:44:13,140
she doesn't realize
her sister hates her.
968
00:44:13,179 --> 00:44:15,779
How do you know so much?
969
00:44:15,779 --> 00:44:18,180
I'm just you, thinly disguised.
970
00:44:18,219 --> 00:44:21,379
You gave me more maturity
and a different name.
971
00:44:22,259 --> 00:44:24,380
What are you saying?
That I know this?
972
00:44:24,419 --> 00:44:26,380
Of course you do.
That's why you picked her...
973
00:44:26,420 --> 00:44:27,900
so it wouldn't work--
974
00:44:27,940 --> 00:44:29,980
so you'd never have
to give up sport-fucking...
975
00:44:30,019 --> 00:44:32,499
and chronic dissatisfaction
and grow up.
976
00:44:32,539 --> 00:44:36,260
I'm not going to get lectured
by my own creation.
977
00:44:36,260 --> 00:44:38,220
You can't fool me.
978
00:44:38,259 --> 00:44:39,939
I'm not like your shrink.
979
00:44:39,939 --> 00:44:42,460
He only knows what you tell him.
I know the truth.
980
00:44:42,499 --> 00:44:45,539
Her sister Lucy--
another head case.
981
00:44:46,980 --> 00:44:48,699
You sure can pick 'em.
982
00:44:48,740 --> 00:44:50,739
Even she was better than Jane...
983
00:44:50,779 --> 00:44:52,379
more maternal,
and she loved you.
984
00:44:53,580 --> 00:44:55,299
You weren't there
the day your bomb dropped...
985
00:44:55,340 --> 00:44:57,700
but take a look.
986
00:45:00,020 --> 00:45:01,420
He left me.
987
00:45:01,459 --> 00:45:03,899
Our marriage is finished.
988
00:45:03,939 --> 00:45:06,499
I'm so sorry.
989
00:45:06,499 --> 00:45:07,739
Are you shocked?
990
00:45:07,779 --> 00:45:09,900
Yes and no.
991
00:45:09,939 --> 00:45:12,859
Things have not been good
for some time.
992
00:45:12,900 --> 00:45:14,339
I knew he played around.
993
00:45:15,500 --> 00:45:17,899
You never mentioned that.
994
00:45:17,939 --> 00:45:20,860
I don't like to discuss
my private life.
995
00:45:20,900 --> 00:45:22,859
I suspected Lynn, his editor.
996
00:45:22,900 --> 00:45:28,020
Then I thought it might be
Allison Davis, our friend.
997
00:45:28,059 --> 00:45:29,940
I even thought he might
have a crush on you.
998
00:45:31,180 --> 00:45:32,500
Me?
999
00:45:32,540 --> 00:45:33,819
You're very beautiful.
1000
00:45:33,860 --> 00:45:35,899
We've spent
a lot of time together.
1001
00:45:35,940 --> 00:45:38,700
You two get along well.
1002
00:45:38,739 --> 00:45:41,860
Obviously, I knew you never
would in a million years...
1003
00:45:41,860 --> 00:45:45,459
but I imagined
he longed for you.
1004
00:45:46,500 --> 00:45:49,540
I think I even heard him
mention your name in his sleep.
1005
00:45:51,020 --> 00:45:52,300
My goodness.
1006
00:45:56,459 --> 00:45:58,020
That's absurd.
1007
00:45:59,619 --> 00:46:00,739
Really.
1008
00:46:02,140 --> 00:46:03,820
You're all red.
1009
00:46:06,980 --> 00:46:08,900
Are you OK?
1010
00:46:11,620 --> 00:46:13,619
Since we're talking openly...
1011
00:46:15,099 --> 00:46:16,739
I have a confession.
1012
00:46:22,420 --> 00:46:26,059
Life takes strange twists
and turns.
1013
00:46:26,099 --> 00:46:27,299
It overwhelms us.
1014
00:46:27,339 --> 00:46:29,340
We're not responsible
for our feelings.
1015
00:46:29,379 --> 00:46:31,179
Everybody's feelings
are irrational.
1016
00:46:31,220 --> 00:46:34,699
But to hear from your husband
that he found another woman...
1017
00:46:34,739 --> 00:46:37,059
He said that?
1018
00:46:37,100 --> 00:46:39,980
He said his future
is all mapped out.
1019
00:46:44,780 --> 00:46:49,099
I'm going to be frank with you.
Just try and hang on--
1020
00:46:49,139 --> 00:46:50,860
I'm being replaced.
1021
00:46:50,899 --> 00:46:53,060
But it doesn't have to be
a nightmare...
1022
00:46:53,060 --> 00:46:54,540
if we're all
just mature about it.
1023
00:46:54,580 --> 00:46:56,819
Replaced by a 25-year-old.
1024
00:46:58,019 --> 00:46:59,859
Excuse me?
1025
00:46:59,900 --> 00:47:01,859
A 25-year-old--
a wannabe writer.
1026
00:47:01,899 --> 00:47:04,619
Fay Sexton is her sexy name.
1027
00:47:06,699 --> 00:47:09,100
What's the matter?
Now you're white.
1028
00:47:12,260 --> 00:47:14,020
Have you eaten anything today?
1029
00:47:17,779 --> 00:47:18,860
Have a drink.
1030
00:47:18,899 --> 00:47:20,659
Finish that.
1031
00:47:20,699 --> 00:47:22,899
Hard to believe him
when he's a liar.
1032
00:47:22,940 --> 00:47:24,140
I'm weak.
1033
00:47:26,579 --> 00:47:28,899
What's wrong?
1034
00:47:28,940 --> 00:47:31,180
You'd think he dumped you.
1035
00:47:31,219 --> 00:47:34,819
I know you feel bad for me,
but I can handle it.
1036
00:47:34,860 --> 00:47:37,579
-Air!
-I'm in shock today, but--
1037
00:47:37,620 --> 00:47:39,459
I want to speak to Fay.
1038
00:47:39,459 --> 00:47:42,499
It's Harry Block.
I've been trying to reach her.
1039
00:47:42,540 --> 00:47:44,419
This is an emergency.
1040
00:47:44,460 --> 00:47:46,019
I've got to talk--
1041
00:47:46,059 --> 00:47:47,979
Tell her to call me back.
1042
00:47:48,020 --> 00:47:49,339
It's the car number.
1043
00:47:49,380 --> 00:47:50,579
The car.
1044
00:47:50,620 --> 00:47:52,580
Give up.
She's in love with someone else.
1045
00:47:52,619 --> 00:47:54,419
This guy is too old for her.
1046
00:47:54,460 --> 00:47:55,700
He's younger than you.
1047
00:47:55,740 --> 00:47:58,139
I'm much too old for her.
It's ridiculous.
1048
00:47:58,180 --> 00:48:00,780
Because of my immaturity, I have
a boyish quality that works.
1049
00:48:00,820 --> 00:48:02,499
Is it much longer?
1050
00:48:02,539 --> 00:48:03,980
We were just at the fair.
1051
00:48:04,019 --> 00:48:05,220
You walked, ate.
1052
00:48:05,259 --> 00:48:06,660
How much longer is it?
1053
00:48:06,660 --> 00:48:08,220
It won't be long.
1054
00:48:08,259 --> 00:48:11,740
My sister lives
10 minutes from here.
1055
00:48:11,780 --> 00:48:13,540
We'll surprise her.
It'll be fun.
1056
00:48:13,540 --> 00:48:14,859
You can eat, walk around--
1057
00:48:14,900 --> 00:48:16,259
She's your half-sister.
1058
00:48:16,259 --> 00:48:18,500
But it'll still be 10 minutes...
1059
00:48:18,539 --> 00:48:21,500
not five, just because
she's a half-sister.
1060
00:48:25,659 --> 00:48:27,300
It's wonderful.
1061
00:48:27,300 --> 00:48:28,579
It is so funny.
1062
00:48:28,579 --> 00:48:31,019
-Do you think so?
-And it's sad.
1063
00:48:31,059 --> 00:48:32,419
I really loved it.
1064
00:48:32,460 --> 00:48:34,820
You're so great, so kind.
1065
00:48:34,859 --> 00:48:38,179
You have such a sweet,
kind instinct.
1066
00:48:39,139 --> 00:48:40,899
Don't do that.
1067
00:48:40,939 --> 00:48:44,940
I count on you to be critical,
to be tough.
1068
00:48:44,980 --> 00:48:46,340
You're too easy on me.
1069
00:48:46,379 --> 00:48:49,060
What was wrong with the story?
1070
00:48:49,060 --> 00:48:52,579
It had no energy.
1071
00:48:52,620 --> 00:48:53,939
I became discouraged with it.
1072
00:48:53,980 --> 00:48:56,220
It doesn't release any power.
1073
00:48:56,259 --> 00:48:57,499
It came to nothing.
1074
00:48:57,539 --> 00:48:59,780
I thought it was touching.
1075
00:48:59,780 --> 00:49:03,460
You knew when the boy grew up
he would never love.
1076
00:49:03,500 --> 00:49:04,659
It was beautiful.
1077
00:49:04,700 --> 00:49:08,339
Your problem is you love
too easily, too much.
1078
00:49:08,379 --> 00:49:12,619
I think you're beautiful
and great and too kind to me...
1079
00:49:12,660 --> 00:49:14,180
and lovely.
1080
00:49:15,140 --> 00:49:17,460
But you're not in love with me.
1081
00:49:17,500 --> 00:49:21,180
I told you not to fall in love
with me, and I meant that.
1082
00:49:21,219 --> 00:49:23,900
I still have not been able
to figure out why.
1083
00:49:24,939 --> 00:49:28,340
Because l'm the boy
in that story.
1084
00:49:28,379 --> 00:49:30,019
I can't love.
1085
00:49:30,019 --> 00:49:32,420
I don't want you
to get into anything.
1086
00:49:32,459 --> 00:49:33,859
You love Hilly.
1087
00:49:34,659 --> 00:49:35,939
What?
1088
00:49:40,459 --> 00:49:42,820
Because Hilly's my son.
1089
00:49:42,820 --> 00:49:45,819
It's easy to love a little kid.
1090
00:49:45,860 --> 00:49:47,540
You love music.
1091
00:49:48,620 --> 00:49:49,980
You love baseball.
1092
00:49:50,019 --> 00:49:51,780
Baseball's also easy,
because it has rules.
1093
00:49:51,819 --> 00:49:53,579
It has foul lines.
1094
00:49:53,619 --> 00:49:56,099
Women are complicated.
1095
00:49:58,180 --> 00:49:59,420
Happy birthday.
1096
00:49:59,460 --> 00:50:00,780
You're kidding.
1097
00:50:00,820 --> 00:50:02,180
Open it up.
1098
00:50:03,860 --> 00:50:06,499
You didn't have to get anything.
1099
00:50:06,499 --> 00:50:08,299
It's probably another sweater.
1100
00:50:10,059 --> 00:50:13,219
A baseball
signed by the 1951 Giants.
1101
00:50:13,260 --> 00:50:16,300
That's so great.
The '51 Giants were...
1102
00:50:16,340 --> 00:50:17,580
Bobby Thompson.
1103
00:50:17,619 --> 00:50:21,100
The one genuine miracle
of my lifetime.
1104
00:50:21,140 --> 00:50:22,539
When he hit that home run...
1105
00:50:22,579 --> 00:50:25,739
that was the only hint
that there may be a God.
1106
00:50:28,140 --> 00:50:30,499
What made you think of that?
1107
00:50:30,499 --> 00:50:31,459
It was easy.
1108
00:50:31,459 --> 00:50:32,979
You're the greatest.
1109
00:50:34,820 --> 00:50:38,700
It's your birthday today,
so you get any wish you want.
1110
00:50:38,739 --> 00:50:41,380
Anything at all that would
make your day special.
1111
00:50:42,739 --> 00:50:44,339
You are the greatest.
1112
00:50:44,379 --> 00:50:45,700
I don't deserve you.
1113
00:50:45,739 --> 00:50:47,740
You're too...
1114
00:50:56,380 --> 00:50:57,340
We were driving.
1115
00:50:57,379 --> 00:50:59,699
We thought we'd stop in
to see you.
1116
00:50:59,739 --> 00:51:02,179
This is Richard and Cookie.
1117
00:51:02,219 --> 00:51:04,499
I'm your Aunt Doris.
1118
00:51:04,539 --> 00:51:05,899
Remember your Uncle Burt?
1119
00:51:09,219 --> 00:51:12,420
Would you like a cookie
or something like that?
1120
00:51:12,420 --> 00:51:14,500
Come in the kitchen here.
1121
00:51:14,539 --> 00:51:17,139
I got to go to the bathroom.
Where's the john?
1122
00:51:17,180 --> 00:51:19,420
You just go right through there.
1123
00:51:19,459 --> 00:51:20,900
Over there?
1124
00:51:20,940 --> 00:51:22,739
I thought we'd drop in.
1125
00:51:25,300 --> 00:51:28,700
You're the last person
I ever expected to see.
1126
00:51:28,740 --> 00:51:30,140
Don't say that, Doris.
1127
00:51:30,179 --> 00:51:31,539
What's with Cookie?
1128
00:51:31,580 --> 00:51:32,899
Cookie's the nanny.
1129
00:51:32,939 --> 00:51:35,740
Where did you get her from,
an agency or a massage parlor?
1130
00:51:35,779 --> 00:51:38,379
She's sweet.
What are you picking on--
1131
00:51:38,419 --> 00:51:41,699
Still with the sexpots,
the tramps, the vihlde chayes.
1132
00:51:41,740 --> 00:51:43,140
She's got a Ph.D.
1133
00:51:43,140 --> 00:51:45,060
I don't know how she did
on her written...
1134
00:51:45,060 --> 00:51:47,339
but I'm sure she got an A-plus
on her oral.
1135
00:51:47,380 --> 00:51:48,740
Give me a break.
1136
00:51:48,780 --> 00:51:49,980
I'm driving upstate.
1137
00:51:50,020 --> 00:51:52,580
I take the time to say hello.
1138
00:51:52,620 --> 00:51:54,579
Can you believe
they're honoring me at Adair?
1139
00:51:54,619 --> 00:51:55,860
I can't believe it.
1140
00:51:55,900 --> 00:51:59,379
Not that I care, but it's great
for Hilly to see me.
1141
00:51:59,419 --> 00:52:02,060
The last time I saw him,
he was six years old.
1142
00:52:02,100 --> 00:52:04,619
You don't exactly contact me,
either.
1143
00:52:04,660 --> 00:52:06,980
I know what you think of me.
1144
00:52:06,980 --> 00:52:08,220
Don't start in.
1145
00:52:08,260 --> 00:52:11,059
Am I wrong?
It's all over your book--
1146
00:52:11,100 --> 00:52:13,539
"Jewish," "too Jewish,"
"professionally Jewish."
1147
00:52:13,580 --> 00:52:15,819
You attributed it all
to your ex-wife Joan...
1148
00:52:15,859 --> 00:52:17,540
but you gave her
the details of my life...
1149
00:52:17,580 --> 00:52:20,219
because you wanted to depict her
with contempt.
1150
00:52:20,259 --> 00:52:21,820
I don't know
what you're talking about.
1151
00:52:21,859 --> 00:52:23,499
You don't know?
1152
00:52:23,539 --> 00:52:25,619
You made a picture of your ex
as a horror.
1153
00:52:25,660 --> 00:52:28,260
In order to make that picture
unsympathetic--
1154
00:52:28,299 --> 00:52:29,740
you used some of her--
1155
00:52:29,780 --> 00:52:33,659
but mostly, you caricatured
my religious dedication.
1156
00:52:33,699 --> 00:52:37,020
Because it enraged you
that I returned to my roots.
1157
00:52:37,060 --> 00:52:39,900
What roots? You were
a wonderful, sweet kid.
1158
00:52:39,940 --> 00:52:42,619
You got me through my childhood.
1159
00:52:42,660 --> 00:52:45,459
Then you go away
to Fort Lauderdale...
1160
00:52:45,499 --> 00:52:48,219
and you meet this fanatic--
this zealot.
1161
00:52:48,260 --> 00:52:51,860
He fills you
full of superstition.
1162
00:52:51,899 --> 00:52:53,340
It's tradition.
1163
00:52:53,380 --> 00:52:55,339
Tradition is the illusion
of permanence.
1164
00:52:55,379 --> 00:52:56,739
You have no values.
1165
00:52:56,780 --> 00:52:58,820
Your whole life,
it's nihilism, cynicism...
1166
00:52:58,860 --> 00:53:01,259
sarcasm, and orgasm.
1167
00:53:01,300 --> 00:53:03,780
In France, I could run
on that slogan and win.
1168
00:53:05,259 --> 00:53:07,460
I'm a Jew. I was born a Jew.
1169
00:53:07,460 --> 00:53:08,980
Do you hate me because of that?
1170
00:53:09,020 --> 00:53:12,460
If our parents converted
to Catholicism...
1171
00:53:12,499 --> 00:53:15,779
a month before you were born,
we'd be Catholics.
1172
00:53:15,819 --> 00:53:18,340
They're clubs.
They're exclusionary.
1173
00:53:18,379 --> 00:53:21,139
They foster
the concept of the other...
1174
00:53:21,180 --> 00:53:23,780
so you know clearly
who you should hate.
1175
00:53:23,780 --> 00:53:25,340
That's enough.
1176
00:53:25,379 --> 00:53:27,780
If a Jew gets massacred...
1177
00:53:27,820 --> 00:53:30,820
does that bother you more
than if a gentile gets hurt...
1178
00:53:30,859 --> 00:53:33,339
or a black or a Bosnian?
1179
00:53:33,380 --> 00:53:34,579
It does.
1180
00:53:34,620 --> 00:53:36,300
I can't help it.
It's my people.
1181
00:53:36,339 --> 00:53:38,060
They're all your people.
1182
00:53:38,100 --> 00:53:39,939
Burt is right about you.
1183
00:53:39,980 --> 00:53:41,819
You're a self-hating Jew.
1184
00:53:41,859 --> 00:53:44,459
I may hate myself,
but not because I'm Jewish.
1185
00:53:44,500 --> 00:53:46,140
He says he's not
a self-hating Jew...
1186
00:53:46,180 --> 00:53:49,099
and look how he talks about them
in his stories.
1187
00:53:50,659 --> 00:53:53,619
Max and Dolly Pincus
were married for 30 years.
1188
00:53:53,659 --> 00:53:54,940
They raised two children...
1189
00:53:54,980 --> 00:53:57,219
and there was never a family
wedding or bar mitzvah...
1190
00:53:57,260 --> 00:53:59,500
where they were not
generous participants.
1191
00:53:59,539 --> 00:54:00,779
Max, how are you?
1192
00:54:01,859 --> 00:54:03,379
Yossel, mazel tov.
1193
00:54:03,420 --> 00:54:04,660
For Donald.
1194
00:54:04,700 --> 00:54:05,900
Thank you.
1195
00:54:10,659 --> 00:54:14,140
Dolly, you got a private minute?
1196
00:54:14,180 --> 00:54:15,380
Sure.
1197
00:54:15,420 --> 00:54:17,659
We are leaving in a few minutes.
1198
00:54:19,260 --> 00:54:21,820
I don't know
if I should tell you.
1199
00:54:21,860 --> 00:54:23,139
Tell me what?
1200
00:54:23,180 --> 00:54:25,780
Tell me, and I will tell you
if you should tell me.
1201
00:54:25,820 --> 00:54:27,060
My heart is heavy.
1202
00:54:27,099 --> 00:54:28,459
What happened?
1203
00:54:28,499 --> 00:54:31,180
Nothing terrible happened
to your husband Phil, did it?
1204
00:54:31,219 --> 00:54:32,780
He has been dead
for so many years.
1205
00:54:35,300 --> 00:54:37,340
When I was in Florida
last week...
1206
00:54:37,379 --> 00:54:38,980
I ran into a man...
1207
00:54:39,019 --> 00:54:42,420
who heard from someone
who knew someone.
1208
00:54:42,459 --> 00:54:46,500
Anyway, it seems Max
has some secret from his past.
1209
00:54:47,740 --> 00:54:49,100
You're talking about my Max?
1210
00:54:49,140 --> 00:54:50,579
A dark secret.
1211
00:54:50,620 --> 00:54:52,700
-What kind of a dark secret?
-Dark.
1212
00:54:52,739 --> 00:54:54,939
What is by you dark?
1213
00:54:54,979 --> 00:54:56,140
I don't know.
1214
00:54:56,179 --> 00:54:57,859
What kind of a dark secret?
1215
00:54:57,900 --> 00:55:00,419
We have been married
for 30 years.
1216
00:55:00,459 --> 00:55:02,020
You're his first wife?
1217
00:55:02,059 --> 00:55:03,540
Sure.
1218
00:55:03,579 --> 00:55:05,020
Before me, he worked for--
1219
00:55:05,060 --> 00:55:06,940
All right.
1220
00:55:06,980 --> 00:55:09,219
What?
1221
00:55:09,260 --> 00:55:10,299
You heard something different?
1222
00:55:10,339 --> 00:55:12,259
I heard only a dark secret.
1223
00:55:12,259 --> 00:55:13,660
Do I know what dark secret?
1224
00:55:13,700 --> 00:55:15,099
Who told you?
1225
00:55:16,260 --> 00:55:18,699
Wolf Fishbein.
1226
00:55:18,740 --> 00:55:20,700
Be careful.
1227
00:55:20,739 --> 00:55:22,980
That's all I want to say.
1228
00:55:22,980 --> 00:55:26,259
Dolly tried putting
Elsie's words out of her mind...
1229
00:55:26,300 --> 00:55:28,940
but Max's dark secret
plagued her.
1230
00:55:28,979 --> 00:55:32,180
Then one day,
she ran into Wolf Fishbein...
1231
00:55:32,220 --> 00:55:34,780
and the truth was revealed.
1232
00:55:34,820 --> 00:55:36,580
Try to breathe deeply.
1233
00:55:36,620 --> 00:55:39,620
You were right.
1234
00:55:39,659 --> 00:55:41,459
Fishbein told me a tale.
1235
00:55:41,500 --> 00:55:45,500
Max, before I met him,
he lived in Florida.
1236
00:55:45,539 --> 00:55:49,460
He had a store--groceries.
1237
00:55:49,500 --> 00:55:51,619
He was married.
1238
00:55:51,660 --> 00:55:52,780
Now it comes out.
1239
00:55:53,860 --> 00:55:57,339
To a woman with two children.
1240
00:55:57,379 --> 00:55:59,299
Max had other children?
1241
00:55:59,340 --> 00:56:03,460
The woman's children,
from a prior marriage.
1242
00:56:05,820 --> 00:56:09,179
He began an affair
with the downstairs neighbor--
1243
00:56:09,220 --> 00:56:10,460
a widow.
1244
00:56:10,500 --> 00:56:12,540
He probably had
all his hair then.
1245
00:56:13,659 --> 00:56:18,420
Meanwhile, he got into debt
deeper and deeper...
1246
00:56:18,459 --> 00:56:21,379
and carry on with the neighbor.
1247
00:56:21,420 --> 00:56:22,820
My heart.
1248
00:56:25,540 --> 00:56:28,740
He can't get himself
out of a predicament.
1249
00:56:30,179 --> 00:56:31,499
What does he do?
1250
00:56:31,539 --> 00:56:33,260
He stole money.
1251
00:56:33,299 --> 00:56:35,219
I should be so lucky.
1252
00:56:35,260 --> 00:56:37,060
He killed his wife.
1253
00:56:40,060 --> 00:56:42,180
The man purchased an ax.
1254
00:56:42,219 --> 00:56:43,380
With an ax?
1255
00:56:43,420 --> 00:56:44,620
You know Max.
1256
00:56:44,659 --> 00:56:46,179
He's nothing with tools.
1257
00:56:46,219 --> 00:56:48,499
He can't even hang a picture.
1258
00:56:48,539 --> 00:56:50,059
I'm dropping dead.
1259
00:56:50,100 --> 00:56:52,060
Plus her children.
1260
00:56:53,219 --> 00:56:54,740
Plus a neighbor.
1261
00:56:54,780 --> 00:56:59,020
Four people he killed
one night with an ax.
1262
00:56:59,059 --> 00:57:01,179
Your Max?
1263
00:57:01,220 --> 00:57:02,860
This is not the capper.
1264
00:57:02,899 --> 00:57:04,459
There's more?
1265
00:57:04,500 --> 00:57:05,699
More.
1266
00:57:07,500 --> 00:57:08,939
What more?
1267
00:57:10,059 --> 00:57:11,500
He ate them.
1268
00:57:11,539 --> 00:57:13,099
Are you talking crazy?
1269
00:57:13,140 --> 00:57:16,420
He devoured them.
1270
00:57:16,460 --> 00:57:18,579
I can't breathe.
1271
00:57:18,620 --> 00:57:20,459
Everything is closing in.
1272
00:57:20,499 --> 00:57:24,420
Whatever you do,
first, hear Max's side.
1273
00:57:24,459 --> 00:57:26,460
Max has a side?
1274
00:57:26,499 --> 00:57:29,099
He kills his family
and eats them up.
1275
00:57:29,139 --> 00:57:30,499
The man has a side?
1276
00:57:30,540 --> 00:57:34,499
He was a good husband and
a loving father for 30 years.
1277
00:57:34,540 --> 00:57:36,539
You have a daughter
who went to college.
1278
00:57:36,580 --> 00:57:38,220
You have a son who's a writer.
1279
00:57:39,740 --> 00:57:43,580
Maybe the best course of action
is let sleeping dogs lie.
1280
00:57:44,659 --> 00:57:47,099
Honey, would you pass
the sour cream?
1281
00:57:51,899 --> 00:57:54,300
You haven't touched a thing.
1282
00:57:55,739 --> 00:57:56,859
Nice weather!
1283
00:57:58,020 --> 00:57:59,100
It's OK.
1284
00:57:59,139 --> 00:58:00,900
It's not just OK.
1285
00:58:00,900 --> 00:58:02,179
It's nice!
1286
00:58:02,179 --> 00:58:03,620
All right, all right.
1287
00:58:03,620 --> 00:58:05,660
What are you getting
so steamed up about?
1288
00:58:05,700 --> 00:58:08,099
What makes you such
an authority on the weather?
1289
00:58:08,099 --> 00:58:09,540
Me?
1290
00:58:09,540 --> 00:58:10,979
All I said...
1291
00:58:10,979 --> 00:58:12,899
I know, I know.
I know what you said.
1292
00:58:12,899 --> 00:58:14,819
The fish is delicious.
1293
00:58:14,819 --> 00:58:16,820
Wouldn't you rather have meat?
1294
00:58:16,859 --> 00:58:18,779
Since when do I eat meat?
1295
00:58:18,820 --> 00:58:19,899
Mm-hmm.
1296
00:58:19,940 --> 00:58:22,660
With my arteries, you gotta
watch out for cholesterol.
1297
00:58:22,660 --> 00:58:23,940
Uh-huh.
1298
00:58:23,940 --> 00:58:26,820
What is the "uh-huh"?
1299
00:58:26,820 --> 00:58:29,420
I mean, you've been
very touchy lately.
1300
00:58:29,459 --> 00:58:31,460
Don't interrogate me...
1301
00:58:31,500 --> 00:58:33,420
Mr. Max Pinchuck!
1302
00:58:39,820 --> 00:58:42,140
Where did you hear that name?
1303
00:58:42,180 --> 00:58:44,859
Did you kill your first wife
with an ax?
1304
00:58:44,900 --> 00:58:47,459
I got a headache.
1305
00:58:47,500 --> 00:58:50,059
Did you chop her up
along with your mistress?
1306
00:58:53,260 --> 00:58:57,059
If I tell you why I did it,
do you promise not to nudge me?
1307
00:58:57,059 --> 00:58:59,939
Wolf Fishbein said
in order to hide the bodies...
1308
00:58:59,980 --> 00:59:02,099
you ate them !
1309
00:59:02,139 --> 00:59:05,220
So what are you making a fuss?
1310
00:59:05,259 --> 00:59:07,300
Some bury, some burn.
1311
00:59:07,339 --> 00:59:08,419
I ate.
1312
00:59:08,459 --> 00:59:09,699
Enough!
1313
00:59:09,740 --> 00:59:11,940
I remember
Max Pincus' Dark Secret.
1314
00:59:11,979 --> 00:59:13,379
That is a disgraceful story.
1315
00:59:13,420 --> 00:59:15,459
You don't see your sick view
of our parents?
1316
00:59:15,500 --> 00:59:17,219
I wrote it when I was younger.
1317
00:59:17,260 --> 00:59:19,460
The first of a number
of anti-Semitic pieces.
1318
00:59:19,500 --> 00:59:21,540
Here he is,
direct from the Wailing Wall.
1319
00:59:21,579 --> 00:59:23,460
Disrespectful, shameful.
1320
00:59:23,499 --> 00:59:24,899
Jews haven't suffered enough...
1321
00:59:24,940 --> 00:59:27,580
without being depicted by him
as homicidal cannibals.
1322
00:59:27,619 --> 00:59:29,019
He has no spiritual center.
1323
00:59:29,060 --> 00:59:30,939
He's betting everything
on physics and pussy!
1324
00:59:30,980 --> 00:59:32,660
Excuse the expression.
1325
00:59:32,699 --> 00:59:33,980
Wait till he gets cancer.
1326
00:59:34,020 --> 00:59:35,899
He'll be the first one
in synagogue...
1327
00:59:35,940 --> 00:59:37,499
in the front row in a yarmulke.
1328
00:59:37,539 --> 00:59:39,579
Why should I get cancer?
I eat broccoli.
1329
00:59:39,620 --> 00:59:41,499
Do you care even
about the holocaust...
1330
00:59:41,540 --> 00:59:42,940
or do you think
it never happened?
1331
00:59:42,979 --> 00:59:45,339
Not only do I know
that we lost six million...
1332
00:59:45,380 --> 00:59:49,299
but the scary thing is that
records are made to be broken.
1333
00:59:49,339 --> 00:59:51,580
I know what's out there.
Do you have any idea?
1334
00:59:51,619 --> 00:59:53,660
He creates offensive
Jewish stereotypes...
1335
00:59:53,699 --> 00:59:55,099
Like in Der Sturmer.
1336
00:59:55,140 --> 00:59:57,819
Max is a version of Daddy--
a man you hated...
1337
00:59:57,860 --> 01:00:00,859
a man you think was guilty
of being a terrible parent.
1338
01:00:00,900 --> 01:00:02,459
He was a terrible parent.
1339
01:00:03,299 --> 01:00:05,180
Thank you for dropping by.
1340
01:00:05,219 --> 01:00:07,180
Please come again
in another four years.
1341
01:00:07,220 --> 01:00:09,020
Look, wouldn't it be
a better world...
1342
01:00:09,059 --> 01:00:12,379
if not every group thought
they had a direct line to God?
1343
01:00:12,420 --> 01:00:15,259
He thinks
I'm all Jewish paranoia.
1344
01:00:15,300 --> 01:00:16,700
No, I don't think
you're paranoid.
1345
01:00:16,739 --> 01:00:18,620
I think you're the opposite
of a paranoid.
1346
01:00:18,659 --> 01:00:21,500
You go around with the insane
delusion that people like you.
1347
01:00:30,899 --> 01:00:31,819
What's the matter?
1348
01:00:31,859 --> 01:00:33,260
You son of a bitch!
1349
01:00:33,300 --> 01:00:34,220
What's wrong?
1350
01:00:34,260 --> 01:00:36,140
You sick, sick, sick...
1351
01:00:36,180 --> 01:00:37,579
sick fucking bastard!
1352
01:00:37,619 --> 01:00:38,900
What's wrong?
1353
01:00:40,179 --> 01:00:41,579
What do you think is wrong?
1354
01:00:41,620 --> 01:00:44,140
You've been having an affair
with one of my patients.
1355
01:00:44,179 --> 01:00:45,259
Who?
1356
01:00:45,299 --> 01:00:48,139
Don't act like you don't know
what I'm talking about!
1357
01:00:48,179 --> 01:00:49,259
Don't speak!
1358
01:00:49,300 --> 01:00:51,340
I just talked to her.
She told me the whole thing.
1359
01:00:51,380 --> 01:00:52,340
Who? Who?
1360
01:00:54,100 --> 01:00:56,300
Mrs. Pollack. Amy Pollack.
1361
01:00:56,340 --> 01:00:57,739
Can I explain something?
1362
01:00:57,779 --> 01:00:58,859
You know Amy Pollack?
1363
01:00:58,900 --> 01:01:00,779
Don't explain anything,
you little fucking asshole!
1364
01:01:00,820 --> 01:01:02,220
Will you calm down?
1365
01:01:02,259 --> 01:01:04,459
Don't you tell me to calm down!
1366
01:01:04,499 --> 01:01:06,860
-What's wrong?
-What is wrong?
1367
01:01:06,900 --> 01:01:09,740
I treat this woman
and she exits...
1368
01:01:09,780 --> 01:01:12,620
and you meet her
and you fuck her!
1369
01:01:12,660 --> 01:01:15,019
Supposing I told you
that my fucking Amy Pollack...
1370
01:01:15,059 --> 01:01:18,380
was a disguised plea
for more closeness with you?
1371
01:01:18,420 --> 01:01:21,140
Then I'd say
you are a mental case.
1372
01:01:21,179 --> 01:01:22,620
This is you
with your first wife.
1373
01:01:22,660 --> 01:01:23,740
You're crazy.
1374
01:01:23,780 --> 01:01:26,180
You were claiming you loved her,
couldn't live without her...
1375
01:01:26,180 --> 01:01:28,580
all the while you're having
affair after affair.
1376
01:01:28,580 --> 01:01:31,899
My first wife, I told you,
I was laying in bed with her...
1377
01:01:31,940 --> 01:01:35,140
I turned off her because the way
the light struck her.
1378
01:01:35,140 --> 01:01:37,060
Suddenly she looked to me
like Max Schmeling.
1379
01:01:37,060 --> 01:01:39,100
What do you want me to say?
1380
01:01:39,140 --> 01:01:42,020
Not that she wasn't pretty,
but she looked like Schmeling.
1381
01:01:42,020 --> 01:01:43,299
I couldn't get an erection.
1382
01:01:43,299 --> 01:01:45,059
Stop this tap-dancing!
This is bullshit!
1383
01:01:45,059 --> 01:01:46,820
It's not bullshit.
1384
01:01:46,820 --> 01:01:49,540
With you, it's different.
You turned off me.
1385
01:01:49,540 --> 01:01:51,460
Ever since Hilly was born.
1386
01:01:51,460 --> 01:01:54,340
We've been living like siblings.
It's been platonic.
1387
01:01:54,340 --> 01:01:55,860
Don't play "blame the victim"!
1388
01:01:55,899 --> 01:01:57,259
What are you talking about?
1389
01:01:57,299 --> 01:02:00,139
I'm as much a victim as you.
1390
01:02:00,179 --> 01:02:02,619
You think that getting
a blow job...
1391
01:02:02,659 --> 01:02:06,380
from a big-bosomed 26-year-old
is a pleasurable thing for me?
1392
01:02:06,420 --> 01:02:07,900
You're making me sick!
1393
01:02:07,940 --> 01:02:10,699
I can't believe
this is happening.
1394
01:02:10,739 --> 01:02:11,819
You're overreacting.
1395
01:02:11,860 --> 01:02:13,260
I'm not overreacting!
1396
01:02:13,299 --> 01:02:15,139
Are you trying to tell me...
1397
01:02:15,139 --> 01:02:17,059
that every week
for the last four months...
1398
01:02:17,059 --> 01:02:19,860
you've been with her
in the hotel?
1399
01:02:19,899 --> 01:02:22,259
Oh, that's so crazy.
No, of course not!
1400
01:02:22,300 --> 01:02:24,419
I rented an apartment.
1401
01:02:24,459 --> 01:02:26,300
I'm gonna kill you!
1402
01:02:29,379 --> 01:02:32,259
Hello, doctor.
I'm sorry I'm late.
1403
01:02:32,259 --> 01:02:33,219
Mr. Farber.
1404
01:02:33,219 --> 01:02:35,139
Take off your coat. Come in.
1405
01:02:49,539 --> 01:02:50,980
I've been...
1406
01:02:50,980 --> 01:02:52,900
I've been losing sleep at night.
1407
01:02:52,900 --> 01:02:54,820
I can't shut my eyes at night.
1408
01:02:54,820 --> 01:02:57,219
I think I should quit my job...
1409
01:02:57,219 --> 01:03:00,180
but I can't
bring myself to do it.
1410
01:03:00,219 --> 01:03:03,060
Maybe because my brother-in-law
treats me kindly.
1411
01:03:03,099 --> 01:03:04,980
But working for him...
1412
01:03:05,019 --> 01:03:07,300
is taking its toll on me
emotionally.
1413
01:03:07,300 --> 01:03:09,220
Could you excuse me, Mr. Farber?
1414
01:03:09,220 --> 01:03:10,340
What?
1415
01:03:14,140 --> 01:03:16,139
You fucked-up fuck!
1416
01:03:16,179 --> 01:03:18,339
I can't believe
you fucking did this!
1417
01:03:18,380 --> 01:03:19,620
You fucking asshole!
1418
01:03:19,660 --> 01:03:21,540
You fucked my patient?
1419
01:03:21,580 --> 01:03:23,620
Harry, you don't fuck
somebody's patient!
1420
01:03:23,660 --> 01:03:25,140
Fuck you!
1421
01:03:34,460 --> 01:03:36,059
Continue, Mr. Farber.
1422
01:03:40,380 --> 01:03:41,779
You lost your thread?
1423
01:03:41,819 --> 01:03:43,699
You were talking about
quitting your job.
1424
01:03:43,739 --> 01:03:45,499
Oh. Right.
1425
01:03:47,100 --> 01:03:50,419
I discussed it with my wife.
1426
01:03:50,459 --> 01:03:53,299
While she seems on the surface
to be supportive...
1427
01:03:53,339 --> 01:03:55,219
I know she'd rather I stay on.
1428
01:03:55,259 --> 01:03:57,139
She idolizes Gordon.
1429
01:03:57,179 --> 01:03:59,059
I mean, all the time...
1430
01:03:59,099 --> 01:04:01,939
that's all she does
is spend time with him anyway.
1431
01:04:01,979 --> 01:04:04,660
Listen, could you excuse me
just one more second?
1432
01:04:04,699 --> 01:04:05,860
Again?
1433
01:04:05,900 --> 01:04:08,580
Just continue. I can hear you
from the hallway. Loudly.
1434
01:04:10,700 --> 01:04:12,740
I want you to get out of here.
1435
01:04:12,779 --> 01:04:15,419
I want you to get
your goddamn stuff together...
1436
01:04:15,460 --> 01:04:16,860
and I want you out.
1437
01:04:16,899 --> 01:04:18,780
You know, I cannot understand...
1438
01:04:18,819 --> 01:04:20,859
why the most sophisticated
of women...
1439
01:04:20,899 --> 01:04:22,460
can't tell the difference...
1440
01:04:22,500 --> 01:04:25,500
between a meaningless,
hot, passionate sexual affair...
1441
01:04:25,539 --> 01:04:27,899
and a nice, solid,
tranquil, routine marriage.
1442
01:04:27,940 --> 01:04:29,819
Harry, just tell me something.
1443
01:04:29,860 --> 01:04:32,060
Was she the only one,
or were there others?
1444
01:04:32,100 --> 01:04:33,980
No, Amy Pollack
was the only one.
1445
01:04:34,020 --> 01:04:35,459
May God strike me dead
if I'm lying.
1446
01:04:35,500 --> 01:04:37,499
You're an atheist, Harry!
1447
01:04:37,540 --> 01:04:40,379
We're alone in the universe.
Gonna blame that on me, too?
1448
01:04:40,420 --> 01:04:42,139
-Stop that tap-dancing!
-Stop that!
1449
01:04:42,179 --> 01:04:44,420
You know,
you turned off me first.
1450
01:04:44,459 --> 01:04:46,500
Oh, please!
1451
01:04:46,539 --> 01:04:47,939
No, I gave birth.
1452
01:04:47,980 --> 01:04:51,300
When women give birth,
there is a time period...
1453
01:04:51,339 --> 01:04:53,259
when their hormones
just sort of go crazy.
1454
01:04:54,219 --> 01:04:55,420
But they settle.
1455
01:04:55,459 --> 01:04:57,980
OK, so you're telling me
that you're settling.
1456
01:04:58,020 --> 01:05:00,539
-I accept that.
-You accept that?
1457
01:05:00,580 --> 01:05:02,940
Oh, Harry,
you are so fucking nuts!
1458
01:05:02,979 --> 01:05:04,860
Take it easy.
1459
01:05:04,899 --> 01:05:09,339
Harry, if you're not happy
in a marriage, you don't cheat.
1460
01:05:09,380 --> 01:05:11,099
And with my patient?
1461
01:05:11,140 --> 01:05:13,979
That is a sacred trust.
My patient.
1462
01:05:14,020 --> 01:05:16,059
What do you want?
Who else do I meet?
1463
01:05:16,100 --> 01:05:18,219
I'm here, working in the room,
we have the baby...
1464
01:05:18,260 --> 01:05:20,699
you're out there practicing,
we never socialize.
1465
01:05:21,300 --> 01:05:23,019
So now you're blaming me...
1466
01:05:23,060 --> 01:05:25,420
because I don't go out with you
enough places...
1467
01:05:25,460 --> 01:05:27,299
where you can meet strangers
to fuck?
1468
01:05:31,700 --> 01:05:36,339
I was merely explaining to you
why my choice, of necessity...
1469
01:05:36,380 --> 01:05:38,219
is confined to your practice.
1470
01:05:40,339 --> 01:05:42,499
I knew you were mentally ill
before I married you...
1471
01:05:42,499 --> 01:05:45,099
but I thought because
I was a trained professional...
1472
01:05:45,139 --> 01:05:46,660
that I could help you.
1473
01:05:49,460 --> 01:05:50,859
The last thing you wanna do...
1474
01:05:50,899 --> 01:05:53,020
is get down on yourself
as a therapist.
1475
01:05:55,379 --> 01:05:58,860
I want you to get your shit
and get your goddamn clothes...
1476
01:05:58,900 --> 01:06:01,260
and I want you to get
the fuck out of here!
1477
01:06:01,299 --> 01:06:03,660
You are the most fucking
irresponsible person...
1478
01:06:03,700 --> 01:06:05,740
I've ever seen
in my entire life!
1479
01:06:05,780 --> 01:06:07,380
And get out!
1480
01:06:10,499 --> 01:06:12,099
Continue, Mr. Farber.
1481
01:06:13,700 --> 01:06:15,139
Doctor...
1482
01:06:15,139 --> 01:06:18,500
And I mean tonight,
motherfucker!
1483
01:06:25,539 --> 01:06:27,300
Dad, my Pepsi.
1484
01:06:34,660 --> 01:06:36,580
So you got even
with your ex-wife...
1485
01:06:36,580 --> 01:06:38,619
and with your sister,
and I was born?
1486
01:06:38,660 --> 01:06:40,099
Born? What are you saying?
1487
01:06:40,099 --> 01:06:42,620
From your pen.
From your fertile imagination.
1488
01:06:42,660 --> 01:06:44,219
And I mean imagination.
1489
01:06:44,260 --> 01:06:46,299
I wasn't trying
to get even with Joan.
1490
01:06:46,340 --> 01:06:49,060
You created me
as the shrewish Jewish hybrid...
1491
01:06:49,060 --> 01:06:50,620
who goes off
with another patient...
1492
01:06:50,659 --> 01:06:53,180
an orthodox divorcee
from Tel Aviv.
1493
01:06:53,220 --> 01:06:55,260
My sister never should have
married Burt.
1494
01:06:55,300 --> 01:06:57,340
This guy's turned her
into a zealot.
1495
01:06:57,379 --> 01:06:58,459
She loves you.
1496
01:06:58,499 --> 01:07:00,740
It wasn't her fault
your father persecuted you.
1497
01:07:00,740 --> 01:07:02,780
She was fine
till she wound up with him--
1498
01:07:02,820 --> 01:07:04,740
this right-wing hawk
that she's married.
1499
01:07:04,740 --> 01:07:05,820
Listen to him.
1500
01:07:05,860 --> 01:07:08,580
So she disappointed you
in her choice of husbands?
1501
01:07:08,580 --> 01:07:10,139
Well, fuck you. She loves Burt.
1502
01:07:10,179 --> 01:07:12,899
She was a wonderful kid.
She had a flair for physics.
1503
01:07:12,899 --> 01:07:14,539
Suddenly overnight,
she's kosher.
1504
01:07:14,580 --> 01:07:15,980
She loves you still...
1505
01:07:16,019 --> 01:07:18,860
despite your obvious
condescension towards her life.
1506
01:07:18,899 --> 01:07:20,060
Does she love me?
1507
01:07:20,100 --> 01:07:22,540
Would you like to hear
what she says about you?
1508
01:07:22,580 --> 01:07:23,940
He's not so bad, Burt.
1509
01:07:23,979 --> 01:07:25,860
He really was
a very good brother.
1510
01:07:25,860 --> 01:07:28,580
Just my father never forgave him
when his wife died.
1511
01:07:28,580 --> 01:07:30,019
The man is not a Jewish man.
1512
01:07:30,019 --> 01:07:31,939
He's not a Jewish man.
That's all.
1513
01:07:31,939 --> 01:07:33,500
All right. Poor Harry.
1514
01:07:33,540 --> 01:07:35,300
He was always lost.
1515
01:07:35,300 --> 01:07:37,220
He could just never
accept the fact...
1516
01:07:37,220 --> 01:07:39,259
that there are things
you can't know.
1517
01:07:39,300 --> 01:07:42,180
The man is incapable
of an act of faith.
1518
01:07:42,180 --> 01:07:44,100
For that, I pity him.
1519
01:07:44,100 --> 01:07:46,980
I would like to hug him again
like when we were kids.
1520
01:07:46,980 --> 01:07:49,539
And if I was upset,
he was a comfort to me.
1521
01:07:50,179 --> 01:07:51,739
What happens to us?
1522
01:07:51,780 --> 01:07:52,740
Doris...
1523
01:07:52,740 --> 01:07:54,179
She can't hear you.
1524
01:07:55,900 --> 01:07:57,780
And as for Joan...
1525
01:07:57,820 --> 01:07:59,700
Joan? Joan hates me.
1526
01:07:59,740 --> 01:08:01,140
Well, shouldn't she?
1527
01:08:01,179 --> 01:08:04,059
Why should she hate me,
because I was unfaithful to her?
1528
01:08:04,100 --> 01:08:06,580
No, because when she caught you,
you weren't a man.
1529
01:08:06,620 --> 01:08:09,460
You turned
into this double-talking...
1530
01:08:09,500 --> 01:08:12,180
wise-cracking, tap-dancing liar.
1531
01:08:12,220 --> 01:08:14,260
If she had not become
so enraged...
1532
01:08:14,300 --> 01:08:15,859
maybe we could've
patched things up.
1533
01:08:15,900 --> 01:08:17,700
Listen to this guy. Deluded.
1534
01:08:17,700 --> 01:08:20,020
Maybe it tapered a bit
after Hilly was born...
1535
01:08:20,060 --> 01:08:21,980
but you two had sex
pretty regularly.
1536
01:08:22,019 --> 01:08:24,659
I have no idea
why I took up with that patient.
1537
01:08:24,700 --> 01:08:26,740
She was available,
she was adorable.
1538
01:08:26,780 --> 01:08:28,660
And my marriage
was droning on.
1539
01:08:28,700 --> 01:08:31,379
What you call "droning on,"
most people call "working."
1540
01:08:31,420 --> 01:08:33,780
If that's working,
then marriage is not for me.
1541
01:08:33,819 --> 01:08:35,219
Well, it's not for everyone.
1542
01:08:35,260 --> 01:08:37,060
But then I get lonely.
1543
01:08:37,060 --> 01:08:39,139
Hey, what do you want me to say?
1544
01:08:39,179 --> 01:08:40,979
She gave me Hilly...
1545
01:08:41,020 --> 01:08:42,899
and for that
I'm eternally grateful...
1546
01:08:42,940 --> 01:08:44,980
'cause I love him so much.
1547
01:08:45,020 --> 01:08:46,739
You can have any one
you want here.
1548
01:08:46,780 --> 01:08:48,180
Can I get two?
1549
01:08:48,219 --> 01:08:49,299
You can get two.
1550
01:08:49,339 --> 01:08:51,219
Tell you what,
you get any three presents.
1551
01:08:51,259 --> 01:08:53,620
Go through the store
and pick any three presents, OK?
1552
01:08:53,660 --> 01:08:54,740
Yeah.
1553
01:08:54,779 --> 01:08:55,860
Look what I found.
1554
01:08:55,899 --> 01:08:56,979
Hey.
1555
01:08:57,019 --> 01:08:59,219
This is the chemistry set
you always wanted.
1556
01:08:59,260 --> 01:09:01,139
Look at that. It's perfect.
1557
01:09:01,180 --> 01:09:02,980
No, no. Don't open it here.
1558
01:09:03,019 --> 01:09:05,899
Let me buy it first, OK?
So I don't get into--
1559
01:09:09,099 --> 01:09:10,179
How you doing?
1560
01:09:10,220 --> 01:09:11,779
Larry, what are you doing here?
1561
01:09:11,819 --> 01:09:13,220
Buying my nephew
a Power Ranger.
1562
01:09:13,260 --> 01:09:15,300
When did you get back?
1563
01:09:15,340 --> 01:09:16,899
A couple of days ago.
1564
01:09:16,940 --> 01:09:18,900
Hey, Fay.
1565
01:09:18,939 --> 01:09:20,900
Meet Larry.
I told you about Larry.
1566
01:09:20,940 --> 01:09:22,980
Oh, yeah.
It's nice to meet you.
1567
01:09:23,020 --> 01:09:24,260
Old friend, colleague, peer.
1568
01:09:24,299 --> 01:09:25,379
Right.
1569
01:09:25,419 --> 01:09:26,660
So you got back when?
1570
01:09:26,700 --> 01:09:29,060
Two days ago.
I took a boat down the Amazon.
1571
01:09:29,099 --> 01:09:30,500
Really?
God, that sounds exciting.
1572
01:09:30,540 --> 01:09:32,900
Yes, if you don't mind
malaria and dysentery.
1573
01:09:32,939 --> 01:09:34,820
Butterflies the size of doves.
1574
01:09:34,859 --> 01:09:36,580
Never seen anything like it
before.
1575
01:09:36,619 --> 01:09:38,660
I can live without that,
however.
1576
01:09:38,699 --> 01:09:39,939
It was astounding.
1577
01:09:39,980 --> 01:09:41,540
It sounds it.
1578
01:09:41,579 --> 01:09:44,260
So you got back two days ago?
1579
01:09:44,299 --> 01:09:46,340
We go back a long way.
1580
01:09:46,379 --> 01:09:48,579
We both started out
wanting to be Kafka...
1581
01:09:48,620 --> 01:09:50,659
and you got slightly closer
than me.
1582
01:09:50,700 --> 01:09:52,819
Yeah, I became the insect
and he...
1583
01:09:53,899 --> 01:09:55,299
Good. I'm amazed.
1584
01:09:55,340 --> 01:09:56,740
We should go out.
1585
01:09:56,779 --> 01:10:00,219
Why don't you come to my house
in East Hampton for a weekend?
1586
01:10:00,259 --> 01:10:01,500
It will be great fun.
1587
01:10:01,540 --> 01:10:02,940
Well, let's not get hysterical.
1588
01:10:02,979 --> 01:10:05,340
No, I'd love to.
It would be fun.
1589
01:10:05,380 --> 01:10:06,620
Oh, it's beautiful out there.
1590
01:10:06,659 --> 01:10:08,380
It's sand in the crotch.
It's ticks.
1591
01:10:08,420 --> 01:10:10,259
To get this guy
to leave his room...
1592
01:10:10,300 --> 01:10:13,020
He's never had a tan.
1593
01:10:13,060 --> 01:10:15,899
I've always wanted to learn
how to snorkel.
1594
01:10:15,940 --> 01:10:17,020
Oh, it's great there.
1595
01:10:17,060 --> 01:10:19,260
Where he lives there are sharks.
1596
01:10:19,299 --> 01:10:20,379
You see those photographs...
1597
01:10:20,419 --> 01:10:22,619
of guys with stumps
for legs and arms?
1598
01:10:22,660 --> 01:10:23,740
Am I lying?
1599
01:10:23,780 --> 01:10:25,179
Yes, you are. It's fabulous.
1600
01:10:25,219 --> 01:10:26,620
Let me buy dinner. We'll talk.
1601
01:10:26,660 --> 01:10:28,219
No, we'll buy dinner.
1602
01:10:28,260 --> 01:10:30,299
I'd love to tell you
about the Amazon.
1603
01:10:30,340 --> 01:10:31,740
It changed my life.
1604
01:10:31,779 --> 01:10:33,179
It sounds amazing.
1605
01:10:33,220 --> 01:10:35,260
Gonna write a novel.
I'll tell you.
1606
01:10:35,300 --> 01:10:38,300
I'm not into the Amazon.
You know what the Amazon is?
1607
01:10:38,339 --> 01:10:40,380
The Amazon
is the tiny, little heads...
1608
01:10:40,419 --> 01:10:41,819
with the lips sewn together.
1609
01:10:41,860 --> 01:10:43,419
Can you picture him this way?
1610
01:10:44,740 --> 01:10:46,780
That's great.
We'll go to dinner tonight.
1611
01:10:46,820 --> 01:10:48,219
-Yeah, great.
-That'd be great.
1612
01:10:48,259 --> 01:10:50,979
Great. I'm single, available,
with the soul of a black man.
1613
01:10:52,099 --> 01:10:54,299
Do you smell sulfur?
1614
01:10:54,340 --> 01:10:56,700
Hilly, did you open
the chemistry set?
1615
01:10:57,780 --> 01:10:59,779
Hey, look.
We're almost there.
1616
01:10:59,820 --> 01:11:01,900
Hilly. Hilly, wake up.
We're almost--
1617
01:11:01,939 --> 01:11:04,460
Hilly, wake up.
We're almost at the university.
1618
01:11:04,500 --> 01:11:06,219
Your dad's gonna be honored...
1619
01:11:06,260 --> 01:11:08,139
limited as my curriculum was.
1620
01:11:08,180 --> 01:11:09,260
Richard, we're there.
1621
01:11:09,300 --> 01:11:10,739
Hey, honey. Wake up.
1622
01:11:12,340 --> 01:11:13,420
Something's wrong.
1623
01:11:13,459 --> 01:11:14,859
What's the matter?
1624
01:11:14,900 --> 01:11:17,140
I don't think he's breathing.
1625
01:11:17,179 --> 01:11:19,619
He's dead!
1626
01:11:19,659 --> 01:11:20,940
I can't believe this.
1627
01:11:20,980 --> 01:11:22,539
We were at the doctor's
yesterday.
1628
01:11:22,580 --> 01:11:23,980
They said his heart was fine.
1629
01:11:24,019 --> 01:11:25,100
I'm scared.
1630
01:11:25,139 --> 01:11:26,540
There's nothing
to be scared of, Hilly.
1631
01:11:26,580 --> 01:11:27,660
I'm fine, dad.
1632
01:11:27,700 --> 01:11:30,380
Remember I told you death
is a natural part of life?
1633
01:11:30,420 --> 01:11:31,979
You have to embrace them both.
1634
01:11:32,019 --> 01:11:33,260
What are we gonna do?
1635
01:11:33,300 --> 01:11:35,340
I don't know.
Get back in the car.
1636
01:11:35,380 --> 01:11:36,740
I don't wanna sit next to him !
1637
01:11:41,820 --> 01:11:43,819
Welcome to Adair University.
1638
01:11:44,820 --> 01:11:47,339
We certainly hope
you had a pleasant trip.
1639
01:11:47,379 --> 01:11:48,940
Would you like to rest up?
1640
01:11:48,979 --> 01:11:51,020
Would you like
some refreshments, perhaps?
1641
01:11:51,059 --> 01:11:52,340
Is he all right?
1642
01:11:52,819 --> 01:11:55,500
He's dead, honey.
You got one of them rubber bags?
1643
01:11:55,540 --> 01:11:57,740
We've made arrangements...
1644
01:11:57,779 --> 01:12:00,580
for the body to be delivered
to New York City.
1645
01:12:02,699 --> 01:12:06,340
I don't think he has
any immediate family, actually.
1646
01:12:07,140 --> 01:12:10,659
If you prefer,
we can call off the proceedings.
1647
01:12:11,460 --> 01:12:13,860
I think that's the best idea.
1648
01:12:15,219 --> 01:12:17,580
He'll be all right.
He's here for a purpose.
1649
01:12:21,060 --> 01:12:22,459
You know, I...
1650
01:12:23,139 --> 01:12:24,700
I'll see that...
1651
01:12:24,740 --> 01:12:27,340
that he's, you know...
1652
01:12:27,379 --> 01:12:29,820
that the funeral comes off
and all that.
1653
01:12:29,859 --> 01:12:33,100
I'll see that he's buried
properly.
1654
01:12:33,139 --> 01:12:34,860
I understand.
1655
01:12:38,180 --> 01:12:41,699
Poor Richard.
Oh, Jesus. The poor guy!
1656
01:12:44,659 --> 01:12:47,019
I'm not gonna make it.
I can't go on.
1657
01:12:47,060 --> 01:12:49,099
Not if you keep drinking
and popping pills.
1658
01:12:49,140 --> 01:12:50,979
Oh, Jesus.
I can't believe this.
1659
01:12:50,979 --> 01:12:52,820
My old school
wants to honor me...
1660
01:12:52,860 --> 01:12:54,740
I show up with a hooker
and a dead body.
1661
01:12:54,780 --> 01:12:55,860
Take it easy.
1662
01:12:55,900 --> 01:12:57,979
You're getting yourself
all wound up about nothing.
1663
01:12:58,019 --> 01:12:59,460
-Cookie, look at me!
-What?
1664
01:12:59,460 --> 01:13:01,419
Look! Look!
I'm out of focus!
1665
01:13:01,460 --> 01:13:04,380
You're a little pale,
but you're all right.
1666
01:13:04,419 --> 01:13:06,260
I'm out of focus. I'm soft.
1667
01:13:06,300 --> 01:13:08,620
You better calm down.
They'll be here any minute.
1668
01:13:08,659 --> 01:13:10,499
No, no. It's so humiliating.
1669
01:13:10,499 --> 01:13:12,539
They're gonna honor me,
and I'm a blob.
1670
01:13:12,580 --> 01:13:14,339
You look fine. Don't worry.
1671
01:13:15,259 --> 01:13:16,980
I'll be sitting on the dais.
They're eating.
1672
01:13:17,020 --> 01:13:18,419
They'll get seasick.
They'll throw up.
1673
01:13:18,459 --> 01:13:20,660
Hold my hand. Now relax.
1674
01:13:20,700 --> 01:13:23,540
You drive all the way here so
your son can see you honored...
1675
01:13:23,580 --> 01:13:25,620
and you make a jackass
out of yourself.
1676
01:13:25,660 --> 01:13:28,220
But don't you see?
I'm a huge blur.
1677
01:13:28,260 --> 01:13:30,460
You're gonna be all right.
I'm gonna talk you down.
1678
01:13:30,499 --> 01:13:32,539
I have seen
all kinds of guys O.D.
1679
01:13:32,579 --> 01:13:35,019
Heroin, acid, crack.
You name it.
1680
01:13:35,059 --> 01:13:36,460
I didn't take any of that stuff.
1681
01:13:36,500 --> 01:13:38,380
Yeah, but you're a pill-popper.
1682
01:13:38,420 --> 01:13:40,659
That's not what it is, Cookie.
It's me.
1683
01:13:40,700 --> 01:13:43,180
I'm O.D.ing on myself.
It's that I'm a shit.
1684
01:13:43,220 --> 01:13:44,339
Have some black coffee.
1685
01:13:44,379 --> 01:13:46,139
I don't want anything.
1686
01:13:46,180 --> 01:13:49,419
Talk to me about something.
You like sports?
1687
01:13:49,459 --> 01:13:50,819
Yeah. I was a pitcher.
1688
01:13:50,819 --> 01:13:54,140
When a guy crowded the plate,
I used to throw at his head,
1689
01:13:54,180 --> 01:13:56,100
'cause I'm the worst person
in the world.
1690
01:13:56,100 --> 01:13:57,539
Honey, I've seen worse.
1691
01:13:57,539 --> 01:13:58,980
Who's worse than me?
1692
01:13:58,980 --> 01:14:00,259
Hitler.
1693
01:14:00,259 --> 01:14:01,820
All right. Maybe Hitler.
1694
01:14:01,860 --> 01:14:03,299
Maybe Hitler, Goering,
and Goebbels,
1695
01:14:03,299 --> 01:14:05,219
but I'm fourth,
right behind them.
1696
01:14:05,219 --> 01:14:06,660
Come on, hold my hand.
1697
01:14:06,660 --> 01:14:08,099
Can you feel my hand?
1698
01:14:08,099 --> 01:14:09,059
Yes, it's warm.
1699
01:14:09,059 --> 01:14:10,979
See? It's just panic.
1700
01:14:10,979 --> 01:14:12,420
You're not a blob.
1701
01:14:12,420 --> 01:14:13,900
I know.
I'm gonna get over this.
1702
01:14:14,659 --> 01:14:17,180
I'm having a panic attack.
I have these attacks.
1703
01:14:17,220 --> 01:14:18,659
What sports do you like?
1704
01:14:18,659 --> 01:14:20,579
I like them all.
1705
01:14:20,579 --> 01:14:22,020
I like baseball.
I like basketball.
1706
01:14:22,020 --> 01:14:23,940
I was married to a woman,
Cookie, who--
1707
01:14:23,940 --> 01:14:25,860
she looked like Max Schmeling.
1708
01:14:25,860 --> 01:14:27,939
No, I'm not joking.
1709
01:14:28,899 --> 01:14:30,220
All right, it's time.
1710
01:14:31,180 --> 01:14:34,019
I can't get through this
without you.
1711
01:14:34,019 --> 01:14:35,460
Don't worry about it.
Don't worry.
1712
01:14:35,460 --> 01:14:36,899
If you didn't come
with me today...
1713
01:14:36,899 --> 01:14:38,860
Don't worry about it.
Straighten up.
1714
01:14:39,779 --> 01:14:42,180
I gotta get a tie.
I gotta get my tie.
1715
01:14:42,180 --> 01:14:43,420
All right. Let's go.
1716
01:14:47,419 --> 01:14:50,940
Are you ready to be
immortalized by Adair?
1717
01:14:50,980 --> 01:14:52,420
I teach your books.
1718
01:14:52,420 --> 01:14:54,100
These are some
of my literature students.
1719
01:14:54,139 --> 01:14:56,580
We all know all your work,
your characters...
1720
01:14:56,619 --> 01:14:58,179
even the obscure ones.
1721
01:14:58,220 --> 01:15:00,099
Good reading is a creative act.
1722
01:15:00,140 --> 01:15:01,780
So are you working
on anything now?
1723
01:15:01,819 --> 01:15:04,179
Something we can look forward
to sinking our teeth into?
1724
01:15:04,220 --> 01:15:08,019
I'm in the midst of writing
a thing on the devil...
1725
01:15:08,060 --> 01:15:11,380
who comes and kidnaps
a man's one true love...
1726
01:15:11,419 --> 01:15:13,980
and takes her down to hell,
and he goes to retrieve her.
1727
01:15:14,020 --> 01:15:18,299
Since it's hell, I'm able
to settle a lot of old scores.
1728
01:15:19,139 --> 01:15:20,659
What's the man like?
1729
01:15:20,700 --> 01:15:22,460
It's me, thinly disguised.
1730
01:15:22,500 --> 01:15:26,740
In fact, I don't even think
I should disguise it anymore.
1731
01:15:26,780 --> 01:15:28,700
It's, you know, it's me.
1732
01:15:30,499 --> 01:15:33,460
Floor five: subway muggers,
aggressive panhandlers...
1733
01:15:33,500 --> 01:15:34,580
and book critics.
1734
01:15:35,619 --> 01:15:38,739
Floor six: Right-wing
extremists, serial killers...
1735
01:15:38,779 --> 01:15:40,699
lawyers
who appear on television.
1736
01:15:41,700 --> 01:15:44,020
Floor seven: the media.
1737
01:15:44,060 --> 01:15:45,780
Sorry.
That floor is all filled up.
1738
01:15:46,859 --> 01:15:48,860
Floor eight:
escaped war criminals...
1739
01:15:48,899 --> 01:15:50,860
TV evangelists, and the NRA.
1740
01:15:51,700 --> 01:15:53,979
Lowest level. Everybody off.
1741
01:16:24,579 --> 01:16:25,860
What did you do?
1742
01:16:25,899 --> 01:16:27,780
I invented aluminum siding.
1743
01:16:44,459 --> 01:16:45,500
Dad.
1744
01:16:45,539 --> 01:16:47,420
Get me out of here!
This is terrible!
1745
01:16:47,459 --> 01:16:49,700
You know how
I could never stand hot weather.
1746
01:16:49,740 --> 01:16:51,139
What is this man doing here?
1747
01:16:51,179 --> 01:16:52,900
He's condemned
to eternal suffering.
1748
01:16:52,939 --> 01:16:54,339
Harry, help me.
1749
01:16:54,380 --> 01:16:57,859
I don't understand.
I demand to know the charges.
1750
01:16:57,899 --> 01:16:59,779
"He behaved unconscionably
toward his son...
1751
01:16:59,819 --> 01:17:01,699
"accused the boy
of committing a capital crime...
1752
01:17:01,739 --> 01:17:03,340
"merely by being born."
1753
01:17:03,379 --> 01:17:06,020
"Your wife,
they told me, is dead...
1754
01:17:06,060 --> 01:17:07,940
"but your son, he's thriving."
1755
01:17:08,459 --> 01:17:10,259
Why did he fight not to be born?
1756
01:17:11,260 --> 01:17:13,379
Look, I forgive him.
1757
01:17:15,059 --> 01:17:16,659
What's over is over.
1758
01:17:17,540 --> 01:17:20,420
It's finished.
Let him go to heaven, please?
1759
01:17:20,460 --> 01:17:22,380
I'm a Jew.
We don't believe in heaven.
1760
01:17:23,379 --> 01:17:24,740
Where do you wanna go?
1761
01:17:24,740 --> 01:17:26,660
To a Chinese restaurant.
1762
01:17:26,699 --> 01:17:28,100
Take him to Joy Luck.
1763
01:17:28,140 --> 01:17:30,099
I love him despite everything.
1764
01:17:50,660 --> 01:17:52,059
Looking for someone?
1765
01:17:54,180 --> 01:17:55,899
I'm here to get Fay.
1766
01:17:55,939 --> 01:17:57,939
She's not coming with you.
1767
01:17:57,979 --> 01:17:59,260
What are you telling me?
1768
01:17:59,300 --> 01:18:01,180
Because you're the head
of this whole underworld...
1769
01:18:01,220 --> 01:18:03,780
that you can just abduct her
and get away with it?
1770
01:18:03,820 --> 01:18:06,940
I'm gonna kidnap her back.
What are you laughing?
1771
01:18:06,980 --> 01:18:08,939
You dare to match your powers
against mine?
1772
01:18:08,980 --> 01:18:10,380
You wanna know why?
1773
01:18:10,419 --> 01:18:11,740
Yeah, I do.
1774
01:18:11,780 --> 01:18:14,060
I'm sorry.
Forgive me for laughing.
1775
01:18:14,100 --> 01:18:14,740
Why?
1776
01:18:15,460 --> 01:18:19,899
I'm more powerful than you
because I'm a bigger sinner.
1777
01:18:19,939 --> 01:18:24,260
Because you're a fallen angel,
and I never believed in God...
1778
01:18:24,299 --> 01:18:25,539
or heaven or any of that stuff.
1779
01:18:25,539 --> 01:18:30,059
I'm strictly quarks
and particles and black holes.
1780
01:18:30,100 --> 01:18:32,220
All the other stuff
is junk to me.
1781
01:18:32,259 --> 01:18:34,979
And also I do terrible things.
1782
01:18:35,019 --> 01:18:38,060
I've cheated on all my wives,
and none of 'em deserved it.
1783
01:18:38,100 --> 01:18:41,500
I sleep with whores,
I drink too much...
1784
01:18:41,540 --> 01:18:43,779
I take pills and I lie
and I'm vain...
1785
01:18:43,779 --> 01:18:47,580
I'm cowardly
and prone to violence.
1786
01:18:47,619 --> 01:18:48,699
Violence?
1787
01:18:48,739 --> 01:18:51,700
I once almost ran over
a book critic with my car...
1788
01:18:51,739 --> 01:18:53,460
but swerved at the last second.
1789
01:18:53,499 --> 01:18:55,179
Did you ever have
two women at once?
1790
01:18:55,220 --> 01:18:57,300
Yes, I did have
two women at once.
1791
01:18:57,339 --> 01:18:58,299
And I'll tell you
something else.
1792
01:18:58,339 --> 01:19:00,140
I didn't care
that it was exploitive.
1793
01:19:00,180 --> 01:19:01,260
And I'll tell you
something else.
1794
01:19:01,300 --> 01:19:03,180
-They were sisters.
-Really?
1795
01:19:03,220 --> 01:19:05,820
Yes. Absolutely.
Two blond WASP sisters.
1796
01:19:05,859 --> 01:19:07,099
Not the Sherman twins?
1797
01:19:07,140 --> 01:19:09,100
Yes, the Sherman twins.
Exactly.
1798
01:19:10,340 --> 01:19:11,260
They're here.
1799
01:19:11,300 --> 01:19:13,900
-The Sherman twins are here?
-Sure.
1800
01:19:13,939 --> 01:19:16,460
So, do you know Sandra Pepkin?
1801
01:19:16,500 --> 01:19:18,459
Only the best blow job
in the hadasa.
1802
01:19:18,499 --> 01:19:20,620
So if you know Sandra Pepkin...
1803
01:19:20,659 --> 01:19:23,819
I fucked her best friend,
the cripple, Pearl.
1804
01:19:23,859 --> 01:19:25,339
Oh, Pearl in the wheelchair.
1805
01:19:26,579 --> 01:19:28,499
Speaking of handicaps,
do you know Marie Taylor?
1806
01:19:28,540 --> 01:19:30,939
Well, yes,
but Marie Taylor I don't count.
1807
01:19:30,979 --> 01:19:32,179
Marie Taylor's dyslexic.
1808
01:19:32,219 --> 01:19:34,539
She put her tampax
in her nose.
1809
01:19:34,580 --> 01:19:35,659
You ever fuck a blind girl?
1810
01:19:35,700 --> 01:19:37,340
No, that I never did. Did you?
1811
01:19:37,379 --> 01:19:39,219
They're so grateful.
1812
01:19:40,419 --> 01:19:41,819
Would you like a drink?
1813
01:19:41,860 --> 01:19:44,259
Could I get some tequila?
1814
01:19:44,299 --> 01:19:45,619
I got great tequila.
1815
01:19:45,659 --> 01:19:47,380
Sit down.
Make yourself at home.
1816
01:19:47,419 --> 01:19:48,860
You want me to turn on
the air conditioner?
1817
01:19:48,899 --> 01:19:50,100
You're air conditioned here?
1818
01:19:50,139 --> 01:19:52,219
Sure.
It fucks up the ozone layer.
1819
01:19:52,260 --> 01:19:54,740
I could be very comfortable
down here.
1820
01:19:54,780 --> 01:19:56,100
I'll tell you something, Harry.
1821
01:19:56,100 --> 01:19:57,699
I love it. I love it here.
1822
01:19:57,739 --> 01:19:59,059
I wouldn't be anyplace else.
1823
01:19:59,099 --> 01:20:00,299
Here you go.
1824
01:20:00,339 --> 01:20:03,059
You know, I've been offered
a lot of jobs in your world...
1825
01:20:03,100 --> 01:20:05,099
but why should I be an employee?
1826
01:20:05,139 --> 01:20:07,299
Here I'm my own boss,
and I'm free.
1827
01:20:07,299 --> 01:20:08,740
What kind of jobs
did they offer you?
1828
01:20:08,780 --> 01:20:10,459
For two years,
I ran a Hollywood studio...
1829
01:20:10,500 --> 01:20:12,620
but you can't trust
those people.
1830
01:20:12,659 --> 01:20:13,739
I agree with you.
1831
01:20:13,779 --> 01:20:16,420
Better to rule down here
than to serve in heaven.
1832
01:20:16,460 --> 01:20:17,820
That's Milton, I think.
1833
01:20:17,859 --> 01:20:19,779
To evil.
It keeps things humming.
1834
01:20:19,819 --> 01:20:22,819
Oh, jeez. So you kidnapped Fay?
1835
01:20:22,860 --> 01:20:23,899
Yes, I did.
1836
01:20:23,939 --> 01:20:25,500
But some women are turned on...
1837
01:20:25,539 --> 01:20:26,899
by aggressive, assertive
behavior.
1838
01:20:26,939 --> 01:20:29,020
Yeah, so if I suddenly
kidnapped her back?
1839
01:20:29,060 --> 01:20:31,579
You kidnap?
It's not your style.
1840
01:20:31,619 --> 01:20:33,539
You're not a fun guy.
Too serious.
1841
01:20:33,580 --> 01:20:35,699
Fay knew that.
You're too angry at life.
1842
01:20:35,740 --> 01:20:38,299
-I got a lot to be angry at.
-Who doesn't?
1843
01:20:38,339 --> 01:20:41,059
But sooner or later, Harry,
you gotta back off.
1844
01:20:41,059 --> 01:20:43,659
It's like Vegas.
You're up, you're down...
1845
01:20:43,700 --> 01:20:46,379
but in the end,
the house always wins.
1846
01:20:46,419 --> 01:20:48,420
Doesn't mean
you didn't have fun.
1847
01:20:48,459 --> 01:20:51,420
Now, one thing you are not
is a kidnapper.
1848
01:20:51,459 --> 01:20:53,020
Kidnapper!
1849
01:20:53,060 --> 01:20:54,980
Listen to me!
1850
01:20:55,019 --> 01:20:56,539
Get out of my way!
1851
01:20:56,579 --> 01:20:59,060
Can't you see you're walking
with a fucking kidnapper?
1852
01:20:59,100 --> 01:21:00,539
You'll have to come
with me, sir.
1853
01:21:02,179 --> 01:21:06,900
You're under arrest.
I gotta put the cuffs on you.
1854
01:21:06,940 --> 01:21:08,580
You stay over there.
1855
01:21:08,619 --> 01:21:10,060
How can I kidnap my own son?
1856
01:21:11,580 --> 01:21:14,420
Hey, we got drugs in the bag.
1857
01:21:14,460 --> 01:21:16,380
Let me go, bitch!
Just let me go!
1858
01:21:17,939 --> 01:21:19,380
Get off of me, bitch!
1859
01:21:22,179 --> 01:21:24,020
Can't I be honored
and then arrested?
1860
01:21:24,060 --> 01:21:25,779
No, we can't do that.
I'm sorry.
1861
01:21:26,979 --> 01:21:28,259
Kidnapping?
1862
01:21:28,259 --> 01:21:32,260
Prostitute in your car
in possession of marijuana.
1863
01:21:32,300 --> 01:21:34,780
Possession
of an unlicensed firearm.
1864
01:21:34,819 --> 01:21:36,739
I told you already
about the firearm.
1865
01:21:36,780 --> 01:21:39,260
There was a crazy woman
on my roof shooting at me.
1866
01:21:39,300 --> 01:21:41,180
I got the gun away from her,
I put it in my car.
1867
01:21:41,220 --> 01:21:42,860
I was gonna hand it in.
1868
01:21:42,899 --> 01:21:44,419
I gotta make another phone call.
1869
01:21:44,460 --> 01:21:45,499
You made your call.
1870
01:21:45,539 --> 01:21:46,859
Yeah, I know,
but that didn't count.
1871
01:21:46,899 --> 01:21:49,020
That was to my girlfriend's
answering service.
1872
01:21:49,059 --> 01:21:50,619
I'm trying to keep her
from getting married.
1873
01:21:50,660 --> 01:21:52,340
You also called your sister.
1874
01:21:52,379 --> 01:21:53,980
My sister wasn't in.
1875
01:21:54,019 --> 01:21:55,099
You called your lawyer.
1876
01:21:55,139 --> 01:21:56,779
My lawyer was at Canyon Ranch.
1877
01:21:56,820 --> 01:21:58,220
I can never get my lawyer.
1878
01:21:58,259 --> 01:22:00,420
Can I give you some advice?
1879
01:22:00,459 --> 01:22:02,659
You're in deep shit.
1880
01:22:10,300 --> 01:22:12,500
This time,
I think you've really had it.
1881
01:22:14,219 --> 01:22:17,499
Hey, it was your idea
to kidnap Hilly.
1882
01:22:17,540 --> 01:22:18,979
It was my idea?
It wasn't my idea.
1883
01:22:19,019 --> 01:22:20,300
I made a joke.
1884
01:22:20,339 --> 01:22:22,419
You don't have to act out
on every impulse.
1885
01:22:22,460 --> 01:22:24,100
You've got to tell me
the truth.
1886
01:22:24,140 --> 01:22:26,139
Is it better being dead?
1887
01:22:26,180 --> 01:22:28,739
No, it's not really,
but there's one good thing.
1888
01:22:28,780 --> 01:22:30,659
You don't get called
for jury duty...
1889
01:22:30,659 --> 01:22:32,259
but then you have no options.
1890
01:22:32,299 --> 01:22:33,659
It's not for you.
1891
01:22:33,700 --> 01:22:35,660
Jesus. I'm no good at life.
1892
01:22:35,699 --> 01:22:37,820
No, but you write well.
1893
01:22:37,860 --> 01:22:39,620
I write well,
but that's a different story...
1894
01:22:39,660 --> 01:22:41,820
because I can manipulate
the characters and plots.
1895
01:22:41,860 --> 01:22:43,340
You create your own universe...
1896
01:22:43,379 --> 01:22:45,579
but that's much nicer
than the world we have.
1897
01:22:45,619 --> 01:22:47,819
But I can't function
in the world we have.
1898
01:22:47,860 --> 01:22:50,180
I'm a failure at life.
1899
01:22:50,180 --> 01:22:53,139
I think you bring pleasure
to a lot of people.
1900
01:22:53,180 --> 01:22:55,100
But even that's drying up.
1901
01:22:55,140 --> 01:22:57,099
For the last months...
1902
01:22:57,139 --> 01:23:01,219
I haven't been able to come up
with a meaningful idea to write.
1903
01:23:01,259 --> 01:23:05,700
Make peace with your demons
and your block will pass.
1904
01:23:05,739 --> 01:23:10,100
Jesus, it sounds so trite,
but I just want to be happy.
1905
01:23:10,819 --> 01:23:12,459
To be alive is to be happy.
1906
01:23:12,499 --> 01:23:13,979
Take it from me.
1907
01:23:15,180 --> 01:23:17,380
Hey, Block. Come on.
1908
01:23:21,300 --> 01:23:22,739
Some people
just put up your bail.
1909
01:23:24,340 --> 01:23:25,700
This way.
1910
01:23:26,499 --> 01:23:27,819
You?
1911
01:23:27,859 --> 01:23:30,100
We got the message
on our service.
1912
01:23:30,140 --> 01:23:31,500
Came right from our wedding.
1913
01:23:31,539 --> 01:23:33,459
You did?
1914
01:23:33,500 --> 01:23:34,940
We're on our way
to our honeymoon.
1915
01:23:34,979 --> 01:23:38,019
-You got married?
-You have to ask?
1916
01:23:38,060 --> 01:23:39,460
I can't believe it.
1917
01:23:39,460 --> 01:23:41,819
In the end,
you chose him over me?
1918
01:23:41,859 --> 01:23:43,099
I can't fathom this.
1919
01:23:43,140 --> 01:23:44,780
You're gonna insult me
after we ran from the altar...
1920
01:23:44,819 --> 01:23:46,180
to keep you from rotting
in prison?
1921
01:23:46,180 --> 01:23:47,979
I know you get claustrophobic.
1922
01:23:48,019 --> 01:23:49,659
Plus you're the perfect punk.
1923
01:23:49,700 --> 01:23:51,660
You'll get buggered
by every con in the cell block.
1924
01:23:51,699 --> 01:23:53,940
You're the guy
that should be in there...
1925
01:23:53,980 --> 01:23:55,819
because you stole her
from under my nose.
1926
01:23:55,860 --> 01:23:59,340
Harry, he did not steal me.
I love him.
1927
01:23:59,379 --> 01:24:01,299
I can't fathom this.
1928
01:24:01,339 --> 01:24:04,059
I appreciate your coming,
but I can't--
1929
01:24:04,100 --> 01:24:06,379
Why? Why not me?
1930
01:24:06,420 --> 01:24:09,259
You told me I wasn't supposed
to fall in love with you.
1931
01:24:09,300 --> 01:24:12,419
How could you listen to me?
You know how crazy I am.
1932
01:24:12,419 --> 01:24:15,100
Well, you were my mentor,
that's why.
1933
01:24:15,139 --> 01:24:16,779
But you were sleeping
with your mentor.
1934
01:24:16,819 --> 01:24:19,819
So? I've slept
with my gynecologist.
1935
01:24:19,859 --> 01:24:22,579
What has that got to do
with anything?
1936
01:24:22,620 --> 01:24:24,700
You're gonna snorkel
down the Amazon with him...
1937
01:24:24,739 --> 01:24:26,819
when you could have me?
1938
01:24:26,860 --> 01:24:29,340
I will never be
the writer you are.
1939
01:24:29,380 --> 01:24:30,939
You put your art into your work.
1940
01:24:30,980 --> 01:24:32,459
I put it into my life.
1941
01:24:32,500 --> 01:24:34,180
I can make her happier.
1942
01:24:34,219 --> 01:24:36,220
I love you.
1943
01:24:36,259 --> 01:24:40,539
I do. It's just that
I'm in love with Larry.
1944
01:24:40,580 --> 01:24:42,339
I'm his wife.
1945
01:24:42,339 --> 01:24:45,020
I love you, too, Harry.
Give us your blessing...
1946
01:24:45,059 --> 01:24:47,580
so that we can go and enjoy
our honeymoon.
1947
01:24:47,620 --> 01:24:48,980
We'll be in Santa Fe
about a month...
1948
01:24:49,019 --> 01:24:52,380
and when we come back, we'll
all go out. We're friends.
1949
01:24:52,420 --> 01:24:53,500
This is where you're going
on your honeymoon?
1950
01:24:53,539 --> 01:24:55,619
He's taking you to the desert?
1951
01:24:55,659 --> 01:24:58,580
Sand? The desert is cactus.
1952
01:24:58,619 --> 01:25:00,419
It's gila monsters...
1953
01:25:00,419 --> 01:25:03,820
whatever you call them,
lizards, is the desert.
1954
01:25:03,859 --> 01:25:06,059
Harry, give us your blessing,
please?
1955
01:25:06,100 --> 01:25:07,579
Give 'em your blessings...
1956
01:25:07,620 --> 01:25:09,859
before I throw you back
in that fucking jail cell...
1957
01:25:09,899 --> 01:25:11,099
and I bugger you.
1958
01:25:14,139 --> 01:25:16,580
I don't know what to say.
I love you.
1959
01:25:16,619 --> 01:25:18,740
This guy I've loved...
1960
01:25:21,460 --> 01:25:23,179
I give up. I give up.
1961
01:25:25,700 --> 01:25:27,299
We'll get you home, all right?
1962
01:25:28,780 --> 01:25:30,459
Santa Fe, you're gonna take her?
1963
01:25:30,500 --> 01:25:31,900
Tacos.
1964
01:25:53,140 --> 01:25:56,180
Harry, what about
the honoring ceremony?
1965
01:25:59,100 --> 01:26:00,820
We haven't had the ceremony.
1966
01:26:00,860 --> 01:26:02,660
The police interrupted.
1967
01:26:04,339 --> 01:26:05,979
What, am I dreaming?
1968
01:26:06,019 --> 01:26:07,099
Everybody dreams.
1969
01:26:07,140 --> 01:26:08,579
Come on.
1970
01:26:08,619 --> 01:26:10,420
Professor Clark
has everything planned.
1971
01:26:12,260 --> 01:26:14,659
Can I bring Hilly?
1972
01:26:14,700 --> 01:26:16,900
Well, it's your dream.
1973
01:26:18,140 --> 01:26:19,739
Stebbins Hall?
1974
01:26:19,780 --> 01:26:22,299
Everyone is waiting
to honor you.
1975
01:26:22,339 --> 01:26:25,339
After all, you created them.
1976
01:27:29,460 --> 01:27:31,419
I love all of you.
1977
01:27:31,459 --> 01:27:32,939
Really, you've given me...
1978
01:27:32,979 --> 01:27:35,259
some of the happiest moments
of my life...
1979
01:27:35,299 --> 01:27:38,780
and you've even
saved my life at times.
1980
01:27:38,819 --> 01:27:41,820
And now you've actually
taught me things...
1981
01:27:41,859 --> 01:27:43,219
and I'm completely grateful--
1982
01:27:43,259 --> 01:27:46,139
I think the author's message
is to know yourself...
1983
01:27:46,180 --> 01:27:48,699
stop kidding yourself,
accept your limitations...
1984
01:27:48,739 --> 01:27:50,180
and get on with your life.
1985
01:27:50,180 --> 01:27:51,299
It's amazing.
1986
01:27:51,339 --> 01:27:54,619
To me, it's a really interesting
character--
1987
01:27:54,660 --> 01:27:58,020
a guy who can't function well
in life...
1988
01:27:58,059 --> 01:28:01,499
but can only function in art.
1989
01:28:01,540 --> 01:28:04,700
It's sort of sad in a way
and also funny.
1990
01:28:04,740 --> 01:28:07,620
But your books all seem
a little sad on the surface...
1991
01:28:07,659 --> 01:28:09,060
which is why I like
deconstructing them...
1992
01:28:09,100 --> 01:28:11,379
because underneath
they're really happy.
1993
01:28:11,420 --> 01:28:12,699
It's just that
you don't know it.
1994
01:28:14,819 --> 01:28:16,859
I feel like I'm in a dream.
1995
01:28:16,900 --> 01:28:20,620
This, for me, is the best dream
I've had in months.
1996
01:28:20,659 --> 01:28:23,100
The happiest dream--
1997
01:28:23,139 --> 01:28:24,779
Oh, I like it.
1998
01:28:24,819 --> 01:28:26,459
I like it.
1999
01:28:26,500 --> 01:28:31,620
A character who's too neurotic
to function in life...
2000
01:28:31,620 --> 01:28:34,819
who can only function in art.
2001
01:28:36,339 --> 01:28:38,219
Notes for a novel.
2002
01:28:38,939 --> 01:28:40,260
Opening possibility:
2003
01:28:41,419 --> 01:28:46,020
Rifken led a fragmented,
disjointed existence.
2004
01:28:46,059 --> 01:28:48,419
He had long ago come
to this conclusion...
2005
01:28:48,419 --> 01:28:51,019
all people know the same truth.
2006
01:28:51,060 --> 01:28:54,819
Our lives consist
of how we choose to distort it.
2007
01:28:54,859 --> 01:28:57,979
Only his writing was calm.
2008
01:28:58,019 --> 01:29:01,780
His writing, which had
in more ways than one...
2009
01:29:01,819 --> 01:29:03,499
saved his life.
2010
01:29:07,000 --> 01:29:12,000
SUBRip by Cristo
Marc2008 (2009), The Netherlands.
Deconstructing.Harry[1997]
DvDRip[Eng]AC3-SpearSparrow.avi145275
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