All language subtitles for Howard.the.Duck.1986.2160p.UHD

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:50,990 Hi, honey, this is your mother. 2 00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,788 Listen, I know you're very busy with the new job, 3 00:01:53,864 --> 00:01:55,662 but please try and call us. 4 00:01:55,741 --> 00:01:58,085 Did you get the birthday sweater we sent? 5 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:00,379 We?! be home all weekend. Bye. 6 00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:03,631 Howard, Jim here. 7 00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:05,425 We still set for racquetball on Saturday? 8 00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:07,173 Give me a shout, buddy. Bye-bye. 9 00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:09,971 Hi, it's Wendy. 10 00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:13,221 I had this really intense dream last night, Howie. 11 00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:15,678 I was running my fingers through your feathers, 12 00:02:15,761 --> 00:02:17,058 and all of a sudden... 13 00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:19,686 Well, you better come over tonight 14 00:02:19,765 --> 00:02:22,314 and I'll show you what really happened next. 15 00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:24,110 Ciao for now, Howie. 16 00:02:28,565 --> 00:02:30,613 Hey! Ricky Pate, 17 00:02:30,692 --> 00:02:34,788 back with you again for lots more Dance Frenzy excitement! 18 00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:36,456 Here's couple number three, 19 00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:40,161 our lovely Latin dance team from Webford Falls. 20 00:02:40,243 --> 00:02:42,666 Charles is a machinist first class in the Navy 21 00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:46,296 and his darling wife Madge is a blackjack dealer. 22 00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:53,556 Just a super job, kids. 23 00:02:53,632 --> 00:02:54,724 Charles and Madge. 24 00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:56,973 Come on, let's hear it for 'em, folks! 25 00:02:57,052 --> 00:02:58,349 What's the matter, George? 26 00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:01,106 Hmm. JOck itch again? 27 00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:02,182 I've got just the thing. 28 00:03:02,265 --> 00:03:03,265 Hmm. 29 00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:06,232 Here. Why not take a shot of new Shorts Blaster. 30 00:03:06,311 --> 00:03:07,358 Huh? 31 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:11,317 It's guaranteed to wipe out feather fungus in even the most active crotches. 32 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:12,492 Shorts Blaster. 33 00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:14,194 In addition, you've won a new car! 34 00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,282 But that's not all! 35 00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:22,540 Oh, Fred, I love you so much it hurts. 36 00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:23,619 Uh... He's dead! 37 00:03:23,662 --> 00:03:25,039 Why can't society see... 38 00:03:25,664 --> 00:03:28,417 $79.95? Forget it! 39 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:31,674 $49.99? No way! 40 00:03:32,796 --> 00:03:36,642 I'm Crazy Webby, and my prices are insane! 41 00:03:43,598 --> 00:03:44,815 Uh-huh. 42 00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:48,149 Who'd they interview this month? 43 00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:54,109 Mmm-hmm. 44 00:03:54,192 --> 00:03:56,741 My little airbrushed beauty. 45 00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,166 What? 46 00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:07,460 Oh, no! It's a quake! 47 00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:11,467 Hey! I can't get up! 48 00:04:11,543 --> 00:04:12,715 Ahh! 49 00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:14,671 What is going on here? 50 00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:20,435 Casey, did you hear something? 51 00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:24,393 I'm such a lucky girl 52 00:04:25,891 --> 00:04:27,143 In love 53 00:04:30,896 --> 00:04:32,113 Oh! Whoa! 54 00:04:37,319 --> 00:04:38,320 Hey! 55 00:04:38,403 --> 00:04:39,620 Wow! 56 00:05:07,516 --> 00:05:09,860 The cosmos... 57 00:05:09,935 --> 00:05:13,360 Countless worlds upon worlds... 58 00:05:13,438 --> 00:05:15,987 Worlds without end. 59 00:05:16,066 --> 00:05:20,617 In these galaxies, every possible reality exists, 60 00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:23,244 and what is reality on any one world 61 00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:26,668 is mere fantasy on all others. 62 00:05:26,743 --> 00:05:30,919 Here, all is real and all is illusion. 63 00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:35,172 What is, what was, and what will be 64 00:05:35,252 --> 00:05:37,801 start here with the words, 65 00:05:37,879 --> 00:05:41,304 "In the beginning there was, 66 00:05:41,383 --> 00:05:43,181 "Howard the duck!" 67 00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:07,450 Whoa! 68 00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:08,952 Whoo! 69 00:06:40,150 --> 00:06:42,448 I'm a dead duck! 70 00:06:42,861 --> 00:06:44,829 Hey! Come on! 71 00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:45,906 Oh, no! 72 00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:51,369 Hey, Bender! 73 00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:53,580 Go on in, frankenweenie! 74 00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:55,791 We finally found you a date! 75 00:06:58,335 --> 00:06:59,678 What is this? 76 00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:02,597 Stay home, city boy 77 00:07:02,672 --> 00:07:05,221 Hey, that costume don't fool me. No kids allowed! 78 00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:07,394 Hey, wait a minute! That's my date! 79 00:07:07,469 --> 00:07:08,516 I said out of the way! 80 00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:14,476 Own sweet bed at night 81 00:07:17,979 --> 00:07:18,980 No, wait! 82 00:07:19,064 --> 00:07:20,816 Keep your mind off real life 83 00:07:20,899 --> 00:07:24,119 You little creep! You get away from my cart, you filthy degenerate! 84 00:07:24,194 --> 00:07:26,288 So, stick to television 85 00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:30,204 I can make it 86 00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,456 Here in Hunger City 87 00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:36,165 Nothing's gonna stop me 88 00:07:36,247 --> 00:07:39,342 I know I'll survive 89 00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:42,136 I can take it 90 00:07:42,212 --> 00:07:45,091 Here in Hunger City 91 00:07:50,053 --> 00:07:51,053 Christ, it touched me! 92 00:07:51,096 --> 00:07:52,268 What the hell is it? 93 00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,896 I wasn't trying anything! Honest! 94 00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:55,976 Step on it, will you? 95 00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:02,066 So the day folds into night 96 00:08:05,235 --> 00:08:08,455 You sat down in your easy chair 97 00:08:10,991 --> 00:08:12,959 Oh, there! There, there. 98 00:08:14,953 --> 00:08:16,421 Ha! Up and away! 99 00:08:18,915 --> 00:08:21,338 Oh, no! 100 00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:26,423 Are you ready for an incredible story? 101 00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:29,009 Waste it, man! Waste it! 102 00:08:29,092 --> 00:08:30,139 Oh, no! 103 00:08:30,218 --> 00:08:32,687 Here in Hunger City 104 00:08:32,762 --> 00:08:35,857 Nothing's gonna stop me 105 00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:38,936 I know I'll survive 106 00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:42,023 I can take it 107 00:08:42,105 --> 00:08:45,029 Here in Hunger City 108 00:08:45,108 --> 00:08:48,112 Even though they'd eat me 109 00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:50,413 Just to stay alive 110 00:08:51,614 --> 00:08:52,614 Hunger City! 111 00:08:52,657 --> 00:08:55,706 Talk about a rotten day! 112 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:58,792 Hunger City! 113 00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:17,022 Just saw your show! Oh, great. Thanks. 114 00:09:17,098 --> 00:09:19,271 Oh, gracious lady, love your music! Hey! 115 00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:20,351 Bye, now. 116 00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:22,108 Can I have your autograph on my shirt? 117 00:09:22,187 --> 00:09:24,064 Oh, me, too! And my shorts! 118 00:09:24,147 --> 00:09:25,945 Real charming. Just go away, okay? 119 00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:27,697 Hey! I'm talking to you, big rock star! 120 00:09:28,860 --> 00:09:29,861 Let me go, you creep! 121 00:09:29,944 --> 00:09:31,742 Hey, don't go snot-nose on us! 122 00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:33,243 We're your biggest fans! 123 00:09:33,323 --> 00:09:35,041 I said, let me go! 124 00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:40,876 Help, somebody, help! 125 00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:43,041 Help! 126 00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:45,593 Come here, snot-nose! 127 00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:48,756 That's it. 128 00:09:48,838 --> 00:09:51,182 No more Mr. Nice Duck. 129 00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:56,554 Huh? 130 00:09:56,805 --> 00:09:58,227 Let the female creature go! 131 00:09:58,681 --> 00:09:59,773 Huh? 132 00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:02,109 Every duck's got his limit, 133 00:10:02,185 --> 00:10:05,189 and you scum have pushed me over the line. 134 00:10:06,147 --> 00:10:07,273 Jimmy... 135 00:10:07,357 --> 00:10:08,950 Do you, like, see what I see? 136 00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:10,322 A talking duck? 137 00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:11,527 Yeah, that's it. 138 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:14,038 I've been doing too much toot! 139 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:16,116 Shoo! Fly away! Shoo! 140 00:10:16,741 --> 00:10:20,120 No one laughs at a master of quack fu! 141 00:10:24,207 --> 00:10:25,880 Jimmy, you okay? 142 00:10:34,717 --> 00:10:36,094 Get off me! 143 00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:44,561 You're crazy! Get out of here! 144 00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:45,861 Come on, you! 145 00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:52,323 You're breaking my fingers! 146 00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:56,452 Now' you and Baby Face are gonna beat it. 147 00:10:56,531 --> 00:10:57,623 Right, Mr. Zits? 148 00:10:57,991 --> 00:11:00,665 Before I get really mad. 149 00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:04,961 Come on! Let's get out of here! 150 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:11,972 This is obviously no place for an intelligent, sensitive duck. 151 00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:13,881 This is unreal. 152 00:11:14,841 --> 00:11:15,888 I mean, it can't be. 153 00:11:16,509 --> 00:11:17,510 Thanks. 154 00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:20,438 You're not really a... 155 00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:22,182 A duck? 156 00:11:22,432 --> 00:11:27,529 You know, this is beginning to seriously undermine my self-esteem. 157 00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:28,947 I'm sorry. 158 00:11:29,606 --> 00:11:32,735 I guess I should thank you for chasing those guys off. 159 00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:33,818 Are you okay? 160 00:11:34,068 --> 00:11:35,991 Yeah, sure. Terrific. 161 00:11:36,070 --> 00:11:38,869 I just have one giant question. 162 00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:40,325 Where am I? 163 00:11:40,992 --> 00:11:42,289 Oh, well, uh, 164 00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:43,585 the lights up there are Ninth Street 165 00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:45,413 and the bus stops at the corner of Powell. 166 00:11:45,496 --> 00:11:46,543 No, no, no, no, no. 167 00:11:46,623 --> 00:11:48,546 I'm asking, what is this place? 168 00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:50,426 Uh... Cleveland. 169 00:11:50,501 --> 00:11:52,629 "Cleve Land?" Uh-huh. 170 00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:56,091 That's a perfect weird name for this planet. 171 00:11:56,174 --> 00:11:57,801 Planet? No, no. That's the city. 172 00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:00,433 The planet's... 173 00:12:00,511 --> 00:12:01,551 You don't know the planet? 174 00:12:02,972 --> 00:12:04,224 Oh, well. 175 00:12:04,807 --> 00:12:06,730 The planet's called Earth, 176 00:12:06,809 --> 00:12:07,810 I think, 177 00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:10,147 and I'm obviously in some sort of terrible nightmare. 178 00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:13,446 Oh, yeah? Your nightmare or mine? 179 00:12:13,524 --> 00:12:14,901 Good point. 180 00:12:16,444 --> 00:12:17,696 So, uh... 181 00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:20,578 I guess I'd better be going. 182 00:12:20,657 --> 00:12:21,749 Mmm. 183 00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,336 Thanks again. 184 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:28,839 Bye. 185 00:12:32,502 --> 00:12:33,549 Bye. 186 00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,289 Listen... Huh? 187 00:13:06,369 --> 00:13:07,712 You got someplace to go? 188 00:13:08,246 --> 00:13:10,795 Hey, if I had someplace to go, 189 00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:13,501 I certainly wouldn't be in Cleveland. 190 00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:36,907 Come on. 191 00:13:43,573 --> 00:13:44,573 Nice place. 192 00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:45,832 You pay to live here? 193 00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:49,458 It's cheap. The manager of my band found it for me. 194 00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:51,460 I suggest you find a new manager. 195 00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:54,588 Hey, I'd love to, but we got this damn contract with the sleazoid, 196 00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:57,511 and he won't even give us the money he owes us. 197 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:01,470 Come on in. 198 00:14:04,218 --> 00:14:07,518 Uh, it's sort of a disaster area. 199 00:14:07,597 --> 00:14:09,725 We've been working on some new songs, you know? 200 00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:11,901 See, the bands called Cherry Bomb. 201 00:14:11,976 --> 00:14:14,320 And... Well' we've been playing 202 00:14:14,395 --> 00:14:17,820 in these grungy mung-holes, waiting for our big break. 203 00:14:20,068 --> 00:14:22,617 You don't have any idea what I'm talking about, do you, Mr... 204 00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:23,988 Hello? 205 00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:26,032 Duck? 206 00:14:26,616 --> 00:14:28,664 It's Howard, thank you. 207 00:14:28,743 --> 00:14:30,290 Right. Howard. 208 00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:32,338 Hi, I'm Beverly. 209 00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:33,881 Uh, listen, 210 00:14:33,956 --> 00:14:37,085 would you like something to eat or drink? 211 00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:39,587 Milk? 212 00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:41,798 I could put it in a bowl. 213 00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:45,055 Ugh, doll, I don't drink out of bowls. 214 00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:46,135 You got a beer? 215 00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:47,803 Beer? 216 00:14:48,763 --> 00:14:51,141 Right. Beer. 217 00:14:51,224 --> 00:14:52,396 Right. 218 00:14:52,975 --> 00:14:54,101 Uh... 219 00:14:54,185 --> 00:14:56,904 God, I can't believe this. 220 00:14:56,979 --> 00:14:58,947 Yeah, yeah. I'll put you in a bowl. 221 00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:00,240 What? 222 00:15:00,316 --> 00:15:02,489 Phew! Oh, give me a break. 223 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:06,869 What's this? 224 00:15:06,948 --> 00:15:09,417 Oh, it's a purse. I got it at a swap meet. 225 00:15:09,492 --> 00:15:10,493 Cute. 226 00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:12,419 Yeah, big brewski. 227 00:15:12,495 --> 00:15:13,621 I'm sorry I'm so nervous. 228 00:15:13,704 --> 00:15:15,344 It's just that I've never been around a... 229 00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:16,999 Mmm-hmm'? 230 00:15:17,542 --> 00:15:19,715 I mean, I've never even had any pets or anything. 231 00:15:20,169 --> 00:15:21,569 It always seemed like such a hassle. 232 00:15:21,629 --> 00:15:24,132 You know, feeding 'em, cleaning up their little poo-poos. 233 00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:26,180 I'll try to be careful. 234 00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:27,786 No, wait. I didn't mean that you... 235 00:15:28,261 --> 00:15:29,262 Hmm? Oh. 236 00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:32,440 Look, why don't you just sit down? 237 00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:34,142 Okay. Why not? 238 00:15:34,225 --> 00:15:36,648 Make yourself at home. 239 00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:39,276 Make myself at home? I wish! 240 00:15:39,355 --> 00:15:40,356 Listen. 241 00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:43,280 Oh, no! Not again! 242 00:15:48,239 --> 00:15:49,991 Howard, it's okay! 243 00:15:51,409 --> 00:15:52,626 You're all right. 244 00:15:52,702 --> 00:15:54,204 The chair started shaking! 245 00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:56,251 It was just a big truck going by. 246 00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:01,594 A truck. I knew that. 247 00:16:02,837 --> 00:16:04,805 What I don't know is 248 00:16:04,881 --> 00:16:07,009 what the hell I'm doing here. 249 00:16:07,884 --> 00:16:09,761 It's like a bad trip. 250 00:16:09,844 --> 00:16:12,848 I mean, talk about an identity crisis. 251 00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:15,437 Yeah. What an awful thing to happen. 252 00:16:15,516 --> 00:16:18,144 Howard, I was just kind of wondering, 253 00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:21,572 does everybody on your planet look like, uh... Like you? 254 00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:23,399 Obviously. Why? 255 00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:25,861 Oh, no reason. Just wondered. 256 00:16:25,943 --> 00:16:27,570 So, what do you do back home? 257 00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:28,996 You got a job? You go to school? 258 00:16:29,071 --> 00:16:30,914 I went to med school for a while. 259 00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:32,458 You went to med school? 260 00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:35,207 Yeah. My parents wanted me to be a doctor. 261 00:16:35,286 --> 00:16:36,663 A plastic surgeon, 262 00:16:36,746 --> 00:16:40,000 making big bucks doing beak jobs, tail tucks. 263 00:16:40,541 --> 00:16:41,542 What happened? 264 00:16:42,460 --> 00:16:43,507 I dropped out. 265 00:16:44,420 --> 00:16:48,175 I decided to educate myself in the real world, on the streets, 266 00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:51,557 so, I wrote songs at night and did construction work by day. 267 00:16:51,636 --> 00:16:53,388 Wow. That sounds great. 268 00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:54,973 You know, I write songs, too. What kind of... 269 00:16:55,056 --> 00:16:57,229 Listen. It doesn't matter. 270 00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,731 It was all a pipe dream. 271 00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:04,361 I got so tired of everyone saying, "Grow up, Howard," 272 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:05,942 I guess I finally did. 273 00:17:06,442 --> 00:17:09,321 Last month, I got what they call a promising job. 274 00:17:09,403 --> 00:17:10,450 Oh, yeah? Doing what? 275 00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:13,658 Advertising copywriter. 276 00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:17,870 "Only two things touch my feathers, 277 00:17:17,954 --> 00:17:20,457 "Oil of Night Fowl and him." 278 00:17:21,457 --> 00:17:22,457 I wrote that 279 00:17:23,626 --> 00:17:24,798 Jeez, Howard. 280 00:17:25,795 --> 00:17:28,969 It sort of sounds like you sold out. 281 00:17:29,298 --> 00:17:33,223 Maybe. But, sometimes, I still get this feeling 282 00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:36,055 there's some kind of special destiny waiting for me. 283 00:17:37,139 --> 00:17:39,642 Howard, that's it. Maybe that's why you're here. 284 00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:42,729 I mean, I believe that there are no accidents in the universe. 285 00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:44,492 Maybe you're here for some greater purpose, 286 00:17:44,522 --> 00:17:46,570 some cosmic cause. 287 00:17:46,649 --> 00:17:48,117 Are you nuts? 288 00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:52,322 I got no intention of being stranded here. 289 00:17:52,863 --> 00:17:54,490 I gotta get back. 290 00:17:55,324 --> 00:17:56,826 How is another matter. 291 00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:59,003 Yeah. Right. 292 00:17:59,745 --> 00:18:01,668 We gotta get some help. 293 00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:03,920 Oh, but, Howard... 294 00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:07,731 Oh, jeez. 295 00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:23,378 Howard! 296 00:19:51,941 --> 00:19:54,160 What am I gonna do with you, 297 00:19:55,444 --> 00:19:56,616 Ducky? 298 00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:25,182 Ah! This is humiliating. 299 00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:28,190 I just don't want people freaking out all over the place. 300 00:20:28,269 --> 00:20:29,316 What about me? 301 00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:32,274 I'm gonna have to see a psychiatrist every day for the rest of my life. 302 00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:33,778 Relax! We're almost there. 303 00:20:33,858 --> 00:20:34,859 Oh, goodie. 304 00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:36,569 Phil's a scientist. He can help. 305 00:20:38,821 --> 00:20:40,073 Oh! Ow! 306 00:20:40,156 --> 00:20:41,499 Howard, this isn't working! 307 00:20:41,615 --> 00:20:43,413 Tell me about it! Can I give you a hand with that? 308 00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:45,415 No. We're doing... What's in the bag? 309 00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,588 I'm doing fine, thank you very much. 310 00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:50,212 Let me out of here. Ouch. 311 00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:51,258 Excuse me, could I help you with that? 312 00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:52,710 Yes! No! 313 00:20:54,044 --> 00:20:55,842 Why are we stopping? 314 00:20:56,839 --> 00:20:58,216 Hi. Oh, hi, Beverly. 315 00:20:58,299 --> 00:20:59,300 We had an appointment. 316 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:02,519 We got here as fast as we could. 317 00:21:13,230 --> 00:21:15,699 God. Listen, everybody. This is it. 318 00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:17,869 I've just seen it. It's in there. 319 00:21:17,943 --> 00:21:19,911 It's a... It's a... 320 00:21:22,698 --> 00:21:23,698 It's nothing! 321 00:21:24,867 --> 00:21:26,835 It's nothing! Never mind! 322 00:21:27,328 --> 00:21:29,080 Carry on, Dr. Chapin. 323 00:21:38,672 --> 00:21:40,891 This is amazing. 324 00:21:41,675 --> 00:21:43,552 Man's oldest fantasy... 325 00:21:44,512 --> 00:21:47,436 Across a sea of stars... 326 00:21:47,515 --> 00:21:52,737 Look! Up in the sky! It's a bird! 327 00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:54,405 It's a plane! 328 00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:57,154 No! It's a duck! 329 00:21:57,733 --> 00:21:59,906 Phil, you've got to help us. 330 00:21:59,985 --> 00:22:01,578 What are we gonna do? 331 00:22:02,154 --> 00:22:03,906 Nice ducky. 332 00:22:04,406 --> 00:22:08,411 Me Phil. You Howard. 333 00:22:08,494 --> 00:22:10,246 We be friends. 334 00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:12,547 Ugh. 335 00:22:13,374 --> 00:22:18,130 Me Phil. You Howard. We can be friends. 336 00:22:18,212 --> 00:22:21,216 Undoubtedly one of Earth's greatest minds here. 337 00:22:22,424 --> 00:22:24,051 Hey, Phil, don't talk to him like that. 338 00:22:24,134 --> 00:22:25,181 He's just as smart as you are. 339 00:22:25,261 --> 00:22:26,888 Oh! Now, I'm really depressed. 340 00:22:26,971 --> 00:22:28,894 Highly intelligent, perhaps even... 341 00:22:28,973 --> 00:22:30,190 Wait, that's it. 342 00:22:30,266 --> 00:22:32,439 We're about to see if the subject has any abilities 343 00:22:32,518 --> 00:22:33,519 we don't have here on Earth, any... 344 00:22:33,602 --> 00:22:34,649 What? 345 00:22:34,728 --> 00:22:35,729 Shall we say... 346 00:22:35,813 --> 00:22:36,860 Hmm'? 347 00:22:36,939 --> 00:22:39,158 Super powers. 348 00:22:40,234 --> 00:22:41,486 Howard! 349 00:22:41,569 --> 00:22:42,821 Hmm'? 350 00:22:42,903 --> 00:22:44,200 Can you bend this? 351 00:22:46,031 --> 00:22:47,453 What are you? Crazy? 352 00:22:47,533 --> 00:22:48,785 Howard... 353 00:22:49,368 --> 00:22:54,750 Can you burn a hole through this with some kind of eye laser? 354 00:22:54,832 --> 00:22:58,382 Can I bite your nose off with my super bill? 355 00:22:58,460 --> 00:23:00,053 Howard, quit holding out! 356 00:23:00,129 --> 00:23:02,598 I want you to concentrate and read my mind! 357 00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:05,805 Right. You're thinking... 358 00:23:06,302 --> 00:23:08,521 "They know I'm a phony. 359 00:23:08,596 --> 00:23:09,973 "They know I'm a yo-yo." 360 00:23:11,140 --> 00:23:13,484 Tell me if I'm warm on any of these, Phil. 361 00:23:13,559 --> 00:23:15,402 I want you to look into the future 362 00:23:15,477 --> 00:23:17,150 and tell me what you see! 363 00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:19,778 I see myself walking out that door. 364 00:23:19,857 --> 00:23:21,734 Yeah! Me, too! 365 00:23:21,817 --> 00:23:23,569 No, no, no! Wait, wait! You can't leave! 366 00:23:23,652 --> 00:23:24,904 Oh, yeah? Why not? 367 00:23:24,987 --> 00:23:26,739 Because there are papers to be written, 368 00:23:26,822 --> 00:23:28,119 there's research to be done, 369 00:23:28,198 --> 00:23:30,747 there's symposiums to give, lecture tours. 370 00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:33,545 Howard, we are on our way to the science hall of fame. 371 00:23:33,621 --> 00:23:35,874 Lookout, Darwin! Lookout, Einstein! 372 00:23:35,956 --> 00:23:37,503 Hello, Nobel Prize! 373 00:23:37,583 --> 00:23:39,585 We are not here to make you famous, Blumburtt. 374 00:23:39,668 --> 00:23:42,342 Beverly, listen, I never badmouth others in the scientific fraternity, 375 00:23:42,421 --> 00:23:44,674 but you bring an alien in a bag to most guys, 376 00:23:44,757 --> 00:23:47,260 and whammo! They're talking, “Let's cut him into little pieces 377 00:23:47,343 --> 00:23:49,095 "and see what color his organs are!" 378 00:23:49,178 --> 00:23:51,431 I just want to know, A, what I'm doing here, 379 00:23:51,513 --> 00:23:53,436 and B, how I'm gonna get back. 380 00:23:53,515 --> 00:23:55,859 Piece of cake. A, I'm just the guy to help, 381 00:23:55,935 --> 00:23:59,109 and that's because B, I've already got a theory. 382 00:23:59,188 --> 00:24:00,360 What theory? 383 00:24:00,439 --> 00:24:04,114 Well, this is, of course, the evolutionary ladder, 384 00:24:04,193 --> 00:24:07,993 showing how man progressed from monkey to... 385 00:24:08,072 --> 00:24:09,449 Me, for instance. 386 00:24:09,531 --> 00:24:11,374 You consider that progress? 387 00:24:11,450 --> 00:24:13,748 Jeez, you're all hairless apes? 388 00:24:13,827 --> 00:24:15,500 That's really disgusting. 389 00:24:15,579 --> 00:24:18,207 Now, I want you both to imagine, 390 00:24:18,290 --> 00:24:21,635 somewhere in the universe is Howard's world. 391 00:24:21,710 --> 00:24:23,963 Picture it in your mind, 392 00:24:24,046 --> 00:24:26,299 a world almost exactly like ours, 393 00:24:26,382 --> 00:24:30,012 except that the progenitor of the dominant species 394 00:24:30,094 --> 00:24:34,395 was not a monkey, but a duck! 395 00:24:34,473 --> 00:24:35,816 Some theory. 396 00:24:35,891 --> 00:24:37,768 Every school duck knows this stuff. 397 00:24:37,851 --> 00:24:39,945 And as the duck 398 00:24:40,020 --> 00:24:42,489 climbed up the evolutionary ladder, 399 00:24:42,564 --> 00:24:44,692 he said adios to his wings. 400 00:24:44,775 --> 00:24:46,948 His mental capacity increases. 401 00:24:47,027 --> 00:24:50,156 He begins to develop... Beverly? 402 00:24:50,239 --> 00:24:51,239 Shopping malls? 403 00:24:52,408 --> 00:24:54,001 No, tribes. 404 00:24:54,076 --> 00:24:55,544 Cro-Magnum duck, 405 00:24:55,619 --> 00:24:58,839 who ultimately evolves into 406 00:24:58,914 --> 00:25:00,006 Howard. 407 00:25:00,082 --> 00:25:01,504 Hey, Blumburtt! Blumburtt! 408 00:25:01,583 --> 00:25:02,630 Come on. 409 00:25:02,710 --> 00:25:04,337 What the hell are you doing? 410 00:25:04,420 --> 00:25:06,422 Don't move! Don't breathe! 411 00:25:07,047 --> 00:25:08,970 Did you finish cleaning up the specimen lab? 412 00:25:09,049 --> 00:25:10,801 Um, almost finished. 413 00:25:10,884 --> 00:25:13,012 Well, get down to the marine life exhibit with a mop. 414 00:25:13,095 --> 00:25:15,564 Some kid upchucked all over the fern fossils. 415 00:25:15,639 --> 00:25:17,232 Right Good as done, Dr. Chapin. 416 00:25:17,975 --> 00:25:20,194 So, Philsie... 417 00:25:20,269 --> 00:25:22,943 You a scientist or a janitor? 418 00:25:23,022 --> 00:25:24,740 Uh, I am a lab assistant. 419 00:25:24,815 --> 00:25:26,112 That's terrific. Just perfect... 420 00:25:26,191 --> 00:25:27,192 Yeah, I'm out of here. 421 00:25:27,276 --> 00:25:28,368 Look, it's just a temporary job 422 00:25:28,444 --> 00:25:30,242 until I finish school and get my own museum. 423 00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:32,118 Yeah. Stuffed, you'd make a great exhibit. 424 00:25:32,197 --> 00:25:33,198 Howard! 425 00:25:33,282 --> 00:25:34,909 Howard, wait! 426 00:25:36,910 --> 00:25:38,503 Ah-ha! Typical hairless ape. 427 00:25:38,579 --> 00:25:40,422 Howard, now, come on. Don't flutter off in a huff. 428 00:25:40,497 --> 00:25:41,874 Beverly, listen, I've got some important matters... 429 00:25:41,957 --> 00:25:42,924 Blumburtt, did you hear me? 430 00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:44,092 To clean up here, but I'll call you tonight. 431 00:25:44,168 --> 00:25:45,169 I want you back in here, now. 432 00:25:45,252 --> 00:25:47,846 I'll figure out a way to help Howard, I swear. 433 00:25:47,921 --> 00:25:49,401 Just don't show him to anybody else... 434 00:25:49,465 --> 00:25:51,308 Yeah, they look hungry. Get 'em a banana. 435 00:25:51,383 --> 00:25:52,600 Hide him! 436 00:25:52,676 --> 00:25:53,973 Take him to a movie! 437 00:25:54,053 --> 00:25:56,055 Look, I didn't know where else to go for help. 438 00:25:56,138 --> 00:25:57,185 Inside, Blumburtt! 439 00:25:57,264 --> 00:25:58,732 Coming! Coming! 440 00:25:58,807 --> 00:26:00,309 Howard, why are you so pissed off? 441 00:26:00,392 --> 00:26:01,939 Why? Listen. 442 00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:05,273 If you got blasted millions of miles through space, 443 00:26:05,355 --> 00:26:06,652 ended up on another planet 444 00:26:06,732 --> 00:26:09,076 and were given an IQ test by a janitor, 445 00:26:09,151 --> 00:26:11,529 you'd be a little pissed off, too. 446 00:26:11,612 --> 00:26:13,614 Look, maybe you are trapped in a world you never made, 447 00:26:13,697 --> 00:26:15,870 but I got problems of my own. 448 00:26:15,949 --> 00:26:18,077 You know, my whole career is falling apart. 449 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:20,128 Your career? What about my life? 450 00:26:21,330 --> 00:26:23,253 I'm stranded here, shipwrecked. 451 00:26:23,332 --> 00:26:25,300 Look at this wonderful exhibit! 452 00:26:25,375 --> 00:26:26,376 You see what I mean? 453 00:26:26,460 --> 00:26:28,258 I'm a freak, an outcast. 454 00:26:28,337 --> 00:26:30,260 It's so lifelike and realistic. 455 00:26:30,339 --> 00:26:31,340 Bugger off! 456 00:26:31,965 --> 00:26:32,966 Excuse me? 457 00:26:33,050 --> 00:26:34,518 I said beat it! 458 00:26:37,012 --> 00:26:38,229 Mutants. 459 00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:40,728 You, too. Leave me alone. 460 00:26:41,934 --> 00:26:42,935 What? 461 00:26:43,018 --> 00:26:46,943 I don't need any more of your sympathy, your charity... 462 00:26:48,941 --> 00:26:50,534 Okay. Okay, fine. 463 00:26:50,609 --> 00:26:52,236 I mean, I just found something... 464 00:26:52,319 --> 00:26:53,411 Uh-uh? 465 00:26:53,487 --> 00:26:56,536 I mean somebody in a pretty weird predicament, and I was trying to help. 466 00:26:56,615 --> 00:26:57,958 Mmm-hmm. 467 00:26:58,033 --> 00:27:00,035 If that's the way you want it, 468 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:02,167 then so long, Ducky. 469 00:27:03,539 --> 00:27:05,792 Don't shed any tears over me, toots! 470 00:27:05,874 --> 00:27:07,876 You can wallow in your own self-pity! 471 00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:08,961 Right! 472 00:27:09,044 --> 00:27:11,843 Well, who needs you? I don't need anybody. 473 00:27:11,922 --> 00:27:13,344 Yeah, right. 474 00:27:14,716 --> 00:27:15,808 Yeah. 475 00:27:18,178 --> 00:27:19,270 Oh, no! 476 00:27:19,930 --> 00:27:23,400 Damn it, I can't sit here on my tail feathers 477 00:27:23,475 --> 00:27:25,443 feeling sorry for myself. 478 00:27:25,519 --> 00:27:27,942 I've got to think about practical matters. 479 00:27:28,021 --> 00:27:29,614 Food, shelter... 480 00:27:30,566 --> 00:27:31,738 A job! 481 00:27:40,659 --> 00:27:44,505 Now, you do know why you were sent to me? 482 00:27:45,164 --> 00:27:47,508 My continuing streak of bad luck? 483 00:27:49,585 --> 00:27:51,428 You've been sent to me because I'm famous 484 00:27:51,503 --> 00:27:54,677 for finding jobs for little slackers like you. 485 00:27:54,756 --> 00:27:55,757 That's right. 486 00:27:55,841 --> 00:27:58,060 They send me all the psycho cases, 487 00:27:58,135 --> 00:27:59,512 all the misfits, 488 00:27:59,595 --> 00:28:01,848 all the phonies and the fakers 489 00:28:01,930 --> 00:28:04,524 who think that, by traipsing in here looking outlandish, 490 00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:06,853 they're not gonna be able to find work! 491 00:28:06,935 --> 00:28:08,653 It's my fault I gotta shoplift 492 00:28:08,729 --> 00:28:10,697 at the little tykes section of Goodwill? 493 00:28:10,772 --> 00:28:12,774 I'm not talking about your clothes! 494 00:28:12,858 --> 00:28:14,906 I'm talking about your face! Hey. 495 00:28:14,985 --> 00:28:17,613 You think that, by looking controversial, 496 00:28:17,696 --> 00:28:20,040 you're never gonna find a job 497 00:28:20,115 --> 00:28:22,334 and just go on collecting unemployment 498 00:28:22,409 --> 00:28:24,628 and living happy on the public dough. 499 00:28:24,703 --> 00:28:27,707 Well, dude, you got another think coming, 500 00:28:27,789 --> 00:28:30,383 'cause Coramae always places her interviewee! 501 00:28:32,544 --> 00:28:34,546 I'm gonna find your ass a job. 502 00:28:34,630 --> 00:28:37,725 That'll wipe that snarl right off your face, 503 00:28:37,799 --> 00:28:38,891 little... 504 00:28:38,967 --> 00:28:40,560 Whatever you is. 505 00:28:40,636 --> 00:28:42,638 Hmm. Infant, 506 00:28:42,804 --> 00:28:45,853 I think I got just the position for you. 507 00:28:47,809 --> 00:28:48,856 Hmm. 508 00:28:52,481 --> 00:28:53,733 I got a feeling 509 00:28:53,815 --> 00:28:57,240 you gonna take to this job like a duck to water. 510 00:29:06,912 --> 00:29:08,914 Towels! Lotions! 511 00:29:10,165 --> 00:29:11,291 Antibiotics? 512 00:29:19,258 --> 00:29:21,681 Hmm, must be mating season. 513 00:29:26,390 --> 00:29:28,142 Creepy little dude. 514 00:29:29,017 --> 00:29:31,270 Hey! Shorty! 515 00:29:31,353 --> 00:29:32,354 Huh? 516 00:29:33,105 --> 00:29:36,609 It's Howard, thank you, and I'm taking a break. 517 00:29:37,192 --> 00:29:39,615 Oh! Pardon me, your lowness, 518 00:29:39,695 --> 00:29:44,576 but we seem to have a plugged-up air jet in number five. 519 00:29:44,658 --> 00:29:45,659 And? 520 00:29:45,742 --> 00:29:46,914 And? 521 00:29:46,994 --> 00:29:51,921 And since you are supposed to be the water expert I asked for, 522 00:29:51,999 --> 00:29:54,218 you are going to fix it! 523 00:29:55,210 --> 00:29:56,712 Oh, no. 524 00:29:56,795 --> 00:29:57,796 No, no, no! Wait, wait! 525 00:29:57,879 --> 00:29:59,631 I got a better idea! Wait! Wait! 526 00:29:59,715 --> 00:30:01,217 I can't swim! 527 00:30:01,300 --> 00:30:03,098 Oops! Guess I slipped! 528 00:30:13,895 --> 00:30:15,488 Don't mind me! 529 00:30:20,861 --> 00:30:23,865 I need that creepy little dude in here to clean this place up! 530 00:30:23,947 --> 00:30:25,307 How am I supposed to run a class... 531 00:30:27,534 --> 00:30:29,081 Guess I slipped. 532 00:30:29,786 --> 00:30:31,254 Just came by to tell you, 533 00:30:32,497 --> 00:30:34,795 I quit! Huh! 534 00:31:14,122 --> 00:31:16,250 Excuse me! Getting off! My stop! 535 00:31:17,459 --> 00:31:18,961 Hi, there. How are you? 536 00:31:19,044 --> 00:31:20,091 Good to see you. 537 00:31:20,170 --> 00:31:21,370 Hey, where you going, pal? 538 00:31:21,421 --> 00:31:23,219 Yeah, same to you. 539 00:31:24,174 --> 00:31:25,892 Urban jungle. Jeez! 540 00:31:27,636 --> 00:31:29,388 - What is that'? - That's a duck! 541 00:31:29,471 --> 00:31:31,473 What is that thing? That's a duck, man! 542 00:31:32,599 --> 00:31:34,759 Forecasting a weekend of fair weather 543 00:31:34,810 --> 00:31:37,905 for you duck hunters and for our lucky field reporter, 544 00:31:37,979 --> 00:31:39,231 Steve Kanelli. 545 00:31:39,314 --> 00:31:41,737 Well, Bob, it's time to dust off those decoys 546 00:31:41,817 --> 00:31:45,196 and practice that squawking because duck hunting season has officially opened... 547 00:31:45,278 --> 00:31:46,278 Duck hunting? 548 00:31:46,321 --> 00:31:49,575 And the Wildlife Commission has actually doubled the limit of ducks that can be shot. 549 00:31:49,658 --> 00:31:50,659 Shot? 550 00:31:50,742 --> 00:31:52,782 Reactions from local hunters have been enthusiastic. 551 00:31:55,288 --> 00:31:58,212 The duck has come to America with Duck-A-Roni. 552 00:31:58,291 --> 00:31:59,508 Oh, no! 553 00:31:59,835 --> 00:32:03,089 But if every hunter can blast 15 of those... from the sky... 554 00:32:05,799 --> 00:32:08,097 Hey, buddy, what's the rush? 555 00:32:22,566 --> 00:32:23,658 Huh? 556 00:32:29,531 --> 00:32:30,623 A' don't know why 557 00:32:30,699 --> 00:32:33,953 You're not talking to me 558 00:32:34,035 --> 00:32:36,333 I don't know what went wrong 559 00:32:38,832 --> 00:32:42,803 Two people who had so much together 560 00:32:42,878 --> 00:32:45,927 Really ought to gel along 561 00:32:46,006 --> 00:32:47,223 Yeah 562 00:32:47,841 --> 00:32:52,312 Something started to change inside of you 563 00:32:52,387 --> 00:32:54,731 Then right out of the blue 564 00:32:57,017 --> 00:33:00,396 Two friends with such a lot to give 565 00:33:01,146 --> 00:33:03,023 I don't know where you are 566 00:33:03,106 --> 00:33:05,029 What you're going through 567 00:33:06,026 --> 00:33:08,950 What are we trying to prove? 568 00:33:09,029 --> 00:33:12,124 'Cause when this world's too big 569 00:33:12,199 --> 00:33:14,793 To take on your shoulders 570 00:33:14,868 --> 00:33:17,747 Feels like love is in vain 571 00:33:18,830 --> 00:33:22,835 You could break down in my arms, babe 572 00:33:22,918 --> 00:33:26,388 But it really hurts when you turn away 573 00:33:27,714 --> 00:33:31,685 And I can take the look you give me 574 00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:33,103 Believe me 575 00:33:33,178 --> 00:33:36,102 'Cause I know you are in pain 576 00:33:36,848 --> 00:33:40,819 And I can take the names you call me 577 00:33:40,894 --> 00:33:44,819 But I can't stand when you turn away 578 00:33:45,524 --> 00:33:47,276 Don 't turn away 579 00:33:48,568 --> 00:33:50,866 I can feel you all around me 580 00:33:51,780 --> 00:33:53,248 This is way too depressing. 581 00:33:56,618 --> 00:33:58,666 Okay. Give me a beat! 582 00:34:00,330 --> 00:34:02,128 One, two, three, four! 583 00:34:05,001 --> 00:34:06,048 Yeah! 584 00:34:07,546 --> 00:34:09,674 Honey! I love you! I love you! 585 00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:12,057 Yeah, right here. Beverly, I'm yours... 586 00:34:12,133 --> 00:34:13,476 After the show. All right. 587 00:34:17,138 --> 00:34:19,857 Here's the money for the girl. 588 00:34:20,642 --> 00:34:22,235 I'll make sure they get it! 589 00:34:23,645 --> 00:34:25,022 Yeah, I'll bet. When? 590 00:34:25,105 --> 00:34:28,905 When? When bodacious Beverly stops holding out on me. 591 00:34:28,984 --> 00:34:30,156 Gonna invite her up to my place tonight 592 00:34:30,235 --> 00:34:32,533 for a little career manipulation. 593 00:34:35,198 --> 00:34:38,452 I guess you must be the girls' manager. 594 00:34:38,535 --> 00:34:40,629 And if you are, 595 00:34:40,704 --> 00:34:44,425 I don't like the way you're talking about Beverly. 596 00:34:44,499 --> 00:34:47,093 And I want the girls' money! 597 00:34:47,168 --> 00:34:49,637 Ritchie, what is that? 598 00:34:49,713 --> 00:34:53,434 Look, Ginger, I warned you when you got into rock management 599 00:34:53,508 --> 00:34:55,681 you'd be dealing with the entertainment types. 600 00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:58,513 You know, different strokes and all that. 601 00:34:58,597 --> 00:35:00,850 Hey, hey, different lifestyles is one thing, 602 00:35:00,932 --> 00:35:03,230 different life forms is another. 603 00:35:09,524 --> 00:35:13,199 I'm not in a real good mood tonight, Ginger. 604 00:35:13,278 --> 00:35:14,871 I want the girls' money. 605 00:35:16,031 --> 00:35:19,535 Now, is this gonna be easy, 606 00:35:21,328 --> 00:35:24,832 or is this gonna be trouble? 607 00:35:24,914 --> 00:35:27,633 Hey, Ritchie, tell it to go away. 608 00:35:27,709 --> 00:35:29,803 I'm not up on all my barnyard languages. 609 00:35:30,920 --> 00:35:35,767 Okay, duck, out! You're gone! You're history, you little wise-quacker! 610 00:35:35,842 --> 00:35:37,139 Arrivederci, duck! 611 00:35:37,218 --> 00:35:39,141 Oh! Oh, no! 612 00:35:41,097 --> 00:35:42,690 Mallard in the side pocket! 613 00:35:42,766 --> 00:35:44,393 Adios, quack man! 614 00:35:45,226 --> 00:35:46,318 Very nicely done. 615 00:35:49,022 --> 00:35:51,445 Hey, what's going on out there now? 616 00:35:56,446 --> 00:35:57,618 Huh? 617 00:36:05,705 --> 00:36:08,549 All right. Now it's my turn. 618 00:36:09,542 --> 00:36:12,341 Hey, come on, duck, take your best shot! 619 00:36:14,172 --> 00:36:15,515 You got it! 620 00:36:15,590 --> 00:36:17,183 Ritchie! Get up! 621 00:36:26,142 --> 00:36:27,564 Duck kabob! 622 00:36:32,065 --> 00:36:33,066 No! 623 00:36:38,655 --> 00:36:41,249 Oh. No earring in your other ear? 624 00:36:41,324 --> 00:36:43,418 I'll just make the hole myself. 625 00:36:43,493 --> 00:36:45,712 No, please, man! Don't, man, please don't! 626 00:36:45,787 --> 00:36:46,788 The money! 627 00:36:46,871 --> 00:36:49,795 Sure! Sure, here! Here, take the money! Take it, it's yours! Take it! 628 00:36:49,874 --> 00:36:52,969 And you're no longer their manager. 629 00:36:53,044 --> 00:36:55,297 Listen, okay, everybody in here is a witness. 630 00:36:55,380 --> 00:36:57,883 I am letting the girls out of their contract, okay? 631 00:36:57,966 --> 00:37:00,219 Tell your goons to stay back! I'm warning you. 632 00:37:00,301 --> 00:37:01,301 Stay back, Ritchie! 633 00:37:01,344 --> 00:37:03,642 I bite your face, you're a dead man, Ginger! 634 00:37:03,972 --> 00:37:04,973 What are you talking about? 635 00:37:05,056 --> 00:37:07,650 Space rabies! 636 00:37:07,726 --> 00:37:09,228 Ritchie, is that a real disease? 637 00:37:09,310 --> 00:37:12,405 I don't know, Ginger. I heard something about that on the news. 638 00:37:12,856 --> 00:37:15,279 That's right, space rabies! 639 00:37:15,900 --> 00:37:19,530 One bite, and it's agonizing death in 15 seconds! 640 00:37:19,612 --> 00:37:21,239 Bite! Bite! Bite! 641 00:37:27,454 --> 00:37:29,331 Real music lovers, huh? 642 00:37:32,041 --> 00:37:33,042 What a dive! 643 00:37:34,836 --> 00:37:37,214 Man, those guys are a bunch of fools! 644 00:37:37,297 --> 00:37:38,549 Obviously the wrong crowd. 645 00:37:38,631 --> 00:37:40,258 I'm running out of sticks to throw at people. 646 00:37:40,341 --> 00:37:41,342 This sucks. 647 00:37:42,510 --> 00:37:43,510 Now what? 648 00:37:43,553 --> 00:37:44,600 Tell 'em to go away. 649 00:37:49,058 --> 00:37:50,685 Down here, doll! 650 00:37:51,519 --> 00:37:52,816 Is Beverly in? 651 00:37:52,896 --> 00:37:55,866 Wow! Jeez! You must be... 652 00:37:56,524 --> 00:37:59,323 KC! Meet Howard. 653 00:37:59,402 --> 00:38:00,403 Wow! 654 00:38:00,487 --> 00:38:01,659 Hi, Howie. 655 00:38:01,738 --> 00:38:03,832 We've heard so much about you. 656 00:38:03,907 --> 00:38:06,001 Of course, we didn't believe it. 657 00:38:06,075 --> 00:38:08,123 Yo! How weird. 658 00:38:10,371 --> 00:38:11,372 Hiya, Ducky. 659 00:38:11,456 --> 00:38:12,582 Hi, toots. 660 00:38:12,665 --> 00:38:14,383 How's the world been treating you? 661 00:38:15,877 --> 00:38:17,299 Guess. 662 00:38:17,378 --> 00:38:20,097 I was worried about you. I missed you. 663 00:38:20,632 --> 00:38:24,978 Well, sex appeal. Some guys got it and some guys don't. 664 00:38:25,261 --> 00:38:26,478 Howard! 665 00:38:27,555 --> 00:38:29,728 Listen, I'm sorry we fought. 666 00:38:30,433 --> 00:38:32,185 You're the only friend I've got here. 667 00:38:37,148 --> 00:38:38,445 Hi! Sorry I missed the show. 668 00:38:38,525 --> 00:38:39,925 I came to watch you undress, though, 669 00:38:40,568 --> 00:38:42,536 and brought a pizza. 670 00:38:42,987 --> 00:38:44,239 Howard! 671 00:38:47,408 --> 00:38:49,251 Oy... Vey. 672 00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:52,672 Thank God you're back! I've been working on the mystery of your arrival! 673 00:38:52,747 --> 00:38:54,249 What's he doing here? 674 00:38:54,332 --> 00:38:56,585 Well, he and Ronette have sort of got back together. 675 00:38:56,668 --> 00:38:59,922 I don't know who's more desperate for dates, you or me. 676 00:39:00,004 --> 00:39:01,426 Huh? Hmm. 677 00:39:01,506 --> 00:39:04,180 Anyway, Howard, I was talking to some astrolophysicists. 678 00:39:04,259 --> 00:39:06,933 You know, the guys that discovered that Aztecs came from Mars. 679 00:39:07,011 --> 00:39:08,809 Well, these guys concluded that you arrived here 680 00:39:08,888 --> 00:39:10,640 in a spacecraft millions of years ago 681 00:39:10,723 --> 00:39:12,225 and must have remained frozen in ice! 682 00:39:12,308 --> 00:39:13,434 Go away! 683 00:39:13,518 --> 00:39:15,270 Ronette, could you shut this boy up? 684 00:39:15,353 --> 00:39:17,071 Howard... What's a pizza? 685 00:39:17,146 --> 00:39:18,739 It's a circular Italian food object. 686 00:39:18,815 --> 00:39:20,817 Howard, I didn't buy that theory either, 687 00:39:20,900 --> 00:39:24,370 so I did some research and I discovered an ancient race of large ducks 688 00:39:24,445 --> 00:39:26,823 worshipped by primitive Samoans. 689 00:39:26,906 --> 00:39:28,829 Leave me alone! 690 00:39:29,784 --> 00:39:32,708 I was barking up the wrong tree, I knew that, 691 00:39:32,787 --> 00:39:36,633 but tonight, I am getting concrete evidence about how you got here. 692 00:39:36,791 --> 00:39:38,338 Wait a minute. 693 00:39:38,418 --> 00:39:40,716 Oh, I gotta make a call. 694 00:39:40,795 --> 00:39:42,797 Phil! No sex now. I'm working. 695 00:39:42,881 --> 00:39:44,508 Got a place to stay tonight? 696 00:39:44,591 --> 00:39:45,808 Mmm-mmm. 697 00:39:50,471 --> 00:39:52,894 Oh, yeah, by the way, I forgot... 698 00:39:52,974 --> 00:39:55,193 I had a little talk with your manager, Ginger. 699 00:39:55,268 --> 00:39:57,191 You talked to that slime? What for? 700 00:39:57,270 --> 00:39:59,193 I got your money from him. 701 00:40:00,356 --> 00:40:01,482 Ducky, I can't believe this! 702 00:40:01,566 --> 00:40:03,409 I also got him to agree 703 00:40:03,484 --> 00:40:05,953 that it was time for him to step aside as your manager. 704 00:40:06,029 --> 00:40:08,031 What? You got rid of Ginger? 705 00:40:08,114 --> 00:40:09,582 Mr. Duck, you're wonderful! 706 00:40:10,783 --> 00:40:12,626 This is it! I'm out of here! 707 00:40:12,702 --> 00:40:13,703 Good! 708 00:40:13,786 --> 00:40:16,209 Howard! I'm about to meet secretly with my colleague, 709 00:40:16,289 --> 00:40:18,132 and he's bringing the feather. 710 00:40:18,207 --> 00:40:20,084 What feather? What are you talking... 711 00:40:20,168 --> 00:40:22,546 If it matches, it'll be the answer to all your problems. 712 00:40:22,629 --> 00:40:25,007 Matches? No, you don't! Stay away from me! 713 00:40:25,089 --> 00:40:26,636 Let me through! Phil, leave him alone. 714 00:40:27,926 --> 00:40:29,678 Philip, get a grip! 715 00:40:29,761 --> 00:40:32,355 I'm about to unravel the mystery of your arrival! 716 00:40:32,430 --> 00:40:34,478 Come back here, you hairless ape! 717 00:40:34,557 --> 00:40:35,774 You'll have time to thank me later. 718 00:40:35,850 --> 00:40:37,147 Get out of here, geek! 719 00:40:37,226 --> 00:40:38,603 We're gonna be famous! 720 00:40:38,686 --> 00:40:40,154 Are you okay? 721 00:40:40,229 --> 00:40:42,448 Oh, it's just my pride. 722 00:40:42,523 --> 00:40:44,321 We'll go home, Ducky. 723 00:41:01,167 --> 00:41:02,259 Hmm. 724 00:41:14,889 --> 00:41:16,015 Yeah. 725 00:41:16,724 --> 00:41:17,976 Uh-huh! 726 00:41:27,276 --> 00:41:28,402 Yeah! 727 00:41:31,656 --> 00:41:32,782 All right! 728 00:41:39,747 --> 00:41:40,839 Hey! 729 00:41:42,250 --> 00:41:43,843 A little tune I never finished. 730 00:41:43,918 --> 00:41:45,670 You play pretty good. 731 00:41:45,753 --> 00:41:47,881 I had a group in high school, 732 00:41:47,964 --> 00:41:49,124 Howard and the Heartbreakers. 733 00:41:49,549 --> 00:41:52,769 Oh, heavy, Howard. Very heavy. 734 00:41:52,844 --> 00:41:55,142 Maybe you should be our manager. 735 00:41:56,264 --> 00:41:57,857 Wait a second... 736 00:41:59,267 --> 00:42:02,111 Maybe you're just the kind of bizarre influence we need. 737 00:42:02,186 --> 00:42:04,905 Forget it. No more jobs here. 738 00:42:04,981 --> 00:42:07,359 Uh-uh. I think you'd be a great manager. 739 00:42:07,442 --> 00:42:09,115 I'm gonna suggest it to the girls. 740 00:42:09,193 --> 00:42:10,866 I've given up trying to assimilate. 741 00:42:10,945 --> 00:42:13,915 Mmm-mmm. I've got to get back to my own kind. 742 00:42:14,866 --> 00:42:17,039 Although... 743 00:42:17,744 --> 00:42:20,213 I have developed a greater appreciation 744 00:42:20,288 --> 00:42:22,837 for the female version of the human anatomy. 745 00:42:24,000 --> 00:42:25,843 Howard, you really are the worst! 746 00:42:27,962 --> 00:42:29,714 Come on, let's watch David Letterman. 747 00:42:30,048 --> 00:42:31,049 Hmm. 748 00:42:31,257 --> 00:42:32,258 Come on. 749 00:42:33,134 --> 00:42:34,556 Okey-dokey. 750 00:42:34,635 --> 00:42:37,184 You know, I got a feeling my life's really gonna change 751 00:42:37,263 --> 00:42:39,231 since you fell into it, Ducky. 752 00:42:39,307 --> 00:42:42,231 Yeah, well, I'm glad somebody's happy. 753 00:42:42,310 --> 00:42:44,070 If I could just get my career back on course, 754 00:42:44,145 --> 00:42:46,898 I'd only have the old standard worry left. 755 00:42:46,981 --> 00:42:47,982 What's that? 756 00:42:48,066 --> 00:42:51,036 Just can't seem to find the right man. 757 00:42:51,110 --> 00:42:53,704 Maybe it's not a man you should be looking for. 758 00:42:56,407 --> 00:43:00,332 You think I might find happiness in the animal kingdom, Ducky? 759 00:43:00,411 --> 00:43:03,711 Like they say, doll, love's strange. 760 00:43:03,790 --> 00:43:05,633 We could always give it a try. 761 00:43:07,877 --> 00:43:09,003 Hmm? 762 00:43:12,757 --> 00:43:13,849 Okay. 763 00:43:14,550 --> 00:43:16,598 Let's go for it, Mr. Macho. 764 00:43:17,512 --> 00:43:20,265 What do you mean, okay? It was a joke! 765 00:43:20,348 --> 00:43:21,565 Mmm-hmm. 766 00:43:22,350 --> 00:43:23,351 Listen... 767 00:43:23,434 --> 00:43:25,607 I'm pretty tired. 768 00:43:25,686 --> 00:43:28,940 It's just that you're so incredibly soft and cuddly. 769 00:43:29,023 --> 00:43:31,446 Bev, let's be realistic. 770 00:43:31,526 --> 00:43:34,120 I mean, my apartment's zillions of miles from here. 771 00:43:35,321 --> 00:43:37,744 You're 3 feet taller than I am. 772 00:43:37,824 --> 00:43:41,124 I just can't resist your intense animal magnetism. 773 00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:45,377 Whoops! 774 00:43:45,456 --> 00:43:47,800 Anyway, where will it all lead? 775 00:43:47,875 --> 00:43:50,549 Marriage? Kids? A house in the suburbs? 776 00:43:51,879 --> 00:43:54,678 Let's just face it, it's fate. 777 00:43:54,757 --> 00:43:56,259 No! It's not! 778 00:43:58,094 --> 00:43:59,471 I've got a headache. 779 00:43:59,554 --> 00:44:01,431 And I got the aspirin. 780 00:44:02,807 --> 00:44:04,024 Be gentle. 781 00:44:04,934 --> 00:44:07,562 Just one good-night kiss, sweet Ducky? 782 00:44:09,814 --> 00:44:11,908 Come on, Howard, I was just kidding. 783 00:44:13,442 --> 00:44:14,659 Night. 784 00:44:31,586 --> 00:44:32,758 My God! 785 00:44:33,254 --> 00:44:35,803 This relationship, it defies all the laws of nature. 786 00:44:36,299 --> 00:44:37,346 No, it doesn't 787 00:44:37,425 --> 00:44:38,847 This is not what you think. 788 00:44:38,926 --> 00:44:40,928 We're just very good friends. 789 00:44:42,597 --> 00:44:43,597 Phil! 790 00:44:43,639 --> 00:44:45,107 Oh, I'm sorry. The door was open. 791 00:44:45,183 --> 00:44:46,400 Who the hell are they? 792 00:44:46,851 --> 00:44:50,697 This is my friend Carter, and this is Dr. Walter Jenning, 793 00:44:50,771 --> 00:44:53,115 and I told 'em all about you, Howard. 794 00:44:53,191 --> 00:44:54,864 You were obviously right. 795 00:44:54,942 --> 00:44:56,944 Show him the evidence. 796 00:44:57,028 --> 00:44:58,280 What evidence? 797 00:44:58,362 --> 00:45:01,616 We tested them, and they're both from the same fowl. 798 00:45:01,991 --> 00:45:03,038 You, Howard. 799 00:45:04,118 --> 00:45:05,620 My feathers? 800 00:45:05,703 --> 00:45:07,956 Howard! Howard, don't go berserk! No! 801 00:45:08,039 --> 00:45:10,542 On my planet, we never say die, we say kill! 802 00:45:10,625 --> 00:45:13,174 Now, wait a minute. Listen to me, small visitor. 803 00:45:15,296 --> 00:45:17,390 I can explain how you got here. 804 00:45:17,715 --> 00:45:18,807 Hmm? 805 00:45:20,468 --> 00:45:23,392 Dr. Jenning is in charge of the astrophysics lab at Dynatechnics. 806 00:45:23,471 --> 00:45:24,831 Now, on the night of September 8... 807 00:45:24,889 --> 00:45:26,106 That's the night that Howard landed. 808 00:45:26,182 --> 00:45:28,230 Yes, now, on that night, we were initiating 809 00:45:28,309 --> 00:45:31,062 our first full-scale test of the laser spectroscope. 810 00:45:31,145 --> 00:45:32,818 This was shot during the experiment. 811 00:45:33,064 --> 00:45:35,817 It was just a routine procedure meant to measure 812 00:45:35,900 --> 00:45:38,779 the density of the gases that surround Alpha Centauri. 813 00:45:38,861 --> 00:45:41,080 However, partway through the experiment, 814 00:45:41,155 --> 00:45:46,787 there was a deviation and we lost control of the laser spectroscope. 815 00:45:47,078 --> 00:45:49,046 What do you mean, lost control? 816 00:45:49,121 --> 00:45:54,343 Some unknown force was redirecting the laser beam from its original target 817 00:45:54,418 --> 00:45:56,420 so that it hit your planet instead. 818 00:45:56,504 --> 00:45:59,553 Hit my planet? How about hit my living room? 819 00:45:59,632 --> 00:46:01,225 Talk about an invasion of privacy. 820 00:46:01,300 --> 00:46:03,553 When the beam hit, you must have been caught up 821 00:46:03,636 --> 00:46:05,604 in a massive energy inversion 822 00:46:05,680 --> 00:46:08,274 which literally dragged you through space 823 00:46:08,349 --> 00:46:10,852 back to the power source here on Earth. 824 00:46:10,935 --> 00:46:12,187 Radical. 825 00:46:12,270 --> 00:46:16,241 In the lab that night, we saw a single feather fall. 826 00:46:20,444 --> 00:46:21,491 Oh. 827 00:46:23,239 --> 00:46:25,116 We weren't aware that the rest of you, Howard, 828 00:46:25,199 --> 00:46:28,203 had landed in that alley just 2 miles away. 829 00:46:28,286 --> 00:46:29,458 Any questions? 830 00:46:29,537 --> 00:46:31,631 Yeah. Where are my pants? 831 00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:34,120 Howard, where are you going? 832 00:46:34,166 --> 00:46:35,793 To this lab of theirs. What for'? 833 00:46:36,210 --> 00:46:38,588 To hop back onboard that laser thing. 834 00:46:38,671 --> 00:46:42,175 Then all you have to do is hit the reverse lever to send me back home, right? 835 00:46:42,717 --> 00:46:45,095 Well, we hadn't considered reversing the process. 836 00:46:45,219 --> 00:46:46,562 I don't think it's feasible. Me either. 837 00:46:46,637 --> 00:46:48,765 Now, wait a minute. If we could generate 838 00:46:48,848 --> 00:46:50,395 a strong enough hypercharge... 839 00:46:50,474 --> 00:46:51,521 You can't do that 840 00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:54,319 You mean the reflex mode might provoke a total reversal. 841 00:46:54,395 --> 00:46:56,147 It just might be possible. It won't work. 842 00:46:56,230 --> 00:46:57,482 Yeah. Sir... 843 00:46:57,565 --> 00:46:58,737 Don't listen to them, Howard. 844 00:46:58,816 --> 00:47:01,365 I have got you booked on A.M. Cleveland. 845 00:47:01,444 --> 00:47:03,822 We can get the cover of Science Digest... 846 00:47:03,904 --> 00:47:04,905 Butt out, four-eyes. 847 00:47:04,989 --> 00:47:06,036 Yeah. 848 00:47:06,115 --> 00:47:08,538 Look, you guys, could you really send him back? 849 00:47:08,909 --> 00:47:11,287 If we did, we could establish a continuing link 850 00:47:11,370 --> 00:47:12,997 between our planets, 851 00:47:13,080 --> 00:47:15,503 but he would have to leave tonight, while the alignment still exists. 852 00:47:15,583 --> 00:47:16,800 We can't afford to wait. 853 00:47:16,876 --> 00:47:19,345 You mean I'm finally gonna breeze this flytrap? 854 00:47:19,420 --> 00:47:20,967 Ducky, this is what you wanted. 855 00:47:21,047 --> 00:47:22,173 You're going home. 856 00:47:22,256 --> 00:47:23,508 Yeah. Right. 857 00:47:23,591 --> 00:47:26,515 Carter, call Larry. Have him set up the initiation procedure. 858 00:47:26,594 --> 00:47:27,891 Tell him I'll meet him at the lab right away. 859 00:47:27,970 --> 00:47:29,813 You and Blumburtt can bring Howard. 860 00:47:29,889 --> 00:47:33,735 You are about to make history a second time, my little friend. 861 00:47:33,809 --> 00:47:36,278 Thanks. But once was plenty. 862 00:47:37,313 --> 00:47:38,360 Get to it. Right. 863 00:47:38,439 --> 00:47:41,989 You know, Howard, we could hold out for a PBS special... 864 00:47:42,068 --> 00:47:43,160 Phil. 865 00:47:43,861 --> 00:47:46,614 Bev, get dressed. Aren't you gonna see me off? 866 00:47:46,697 --> 00:47:50,622 Sure, I am. I just hope they let you take a carry-on bag. 867 00:47:50,701 --> 00:47:53,921 Look, I'm gonna put in these Polaroids that we took at the club. 868 00:47:53,996 --> 00:47:55,373 Thanks. 869 00:47:55,456 --> 00:47:56,878 These'll help. 870 00:47:56,957 --> 00:47:59,631 The guys back home are never gonna believe me. 871 00:48:01,545 --> 00:48:02,797 What's this in my bed? 872 00:48:04,298 --> 00:48:05,925 Souvenirs? 873 00:48:07,093 --> 00:48:09,391 I'm gonna miss you a lot, Ducky. 874 00:48:10,137 --> 00:48:12,981 Bev, I don't belong here. 875 00:48:13,057 --> 00:48:14,980 You know I've gotta go. 876 00:48:16,936 --> 00:48:18,188 Yeah. 877 00:48:29,782 --> 00:48:31,750 Lilly had the dolphins, 878 00:48:31,826 --> 00:48:32,827 Cousteau, the whales, 879 00:48:33,494 --> 00:48:35,041 Goodall, gorillas. 880 00:48:35,663 --> 00:48:37,131 I had a duck. 881 00:48:38,582 --> 00:48:40,004 I could have been a contender. 882 00:48:44,046 --> 00:48:45,548 Bev... 883 00:48:45,631 --> 00:48:49,010 I'm not a real sentimental guy. 884 00:48:49,093 --> 00:48:53,599 No. I bet you were born from a very hardboiled egg, Ducky. 885 00:48:53,681 --> 00:48:55,024 Yeah. 886 00:48:55,099 --> 00:48:57,852 But I do keep wondering... 887 00:48:58,686 --> 00:49:02,782 Of all the alleys in the world I could have fallen into that night, 888 00:49:02,857 --> 00:49:04,985 why did it have to be yours? 889 00:49:05,734 --> 00:49:07,862 Because, right now, 890 00:49:07,945 --> 00:49:09,447 you're the one and only thing 891 00:49:09,530 --> 00:49:12,374 that's making it very hard for me to leave. 892 00:49:27,381 --> 00:49:28,473 There's no guard. 893 00:49:28,549 --> 00:49:29,892 Oh. We should go back, then, huh? 894 00:49:29,967 --> 00:49:31,389 Phil... What? 895 00:49:31,469 --> 00:49:32,641 Drive. 896 00:49:50,404 --> 00:49:51,997 What are these alarms? 897 00:49:52,072 --> 00:49:53,512 Somethings happened. What's happened? 898 00:49:53,574 --> 00:49:54,746 I don't know. 899 00:49:54,825 --> 00:49:57,123 That is really cool. Right. 900 00:49:57,203 --> 00:49:59,126 Hold it. Security. 901 00:50:01,123 --> 00:50:03,421 My eyes! My eyes! 902 00:50:04,919 --> 00:50:07,013 It exploded again! It was terrible! 903 00:50:07,087 --> 00:50:10,842 We have no right to tamper with the universe! 904 00:50:13,761 --> 00:50:15,763 This does not bode well. 905 00:50:17,097 --> 00:50:18,098 Hmm. 906 00:50:20,309 --> 00:50:21,686 Is he okay? 907 00:50:24,563 --> 00:50:26,531 - Whoa! - Holy Toledo! 908 00:50:26,607 --> 00:50:28,154 Put it here! Come on! 909 00:50:28,234 --> 00:50:31,613 Get out of the way! It's still hot! Get over here! 910 00:50:32,279 --> 00:50:33,872 Shut down the laser system! 911 00:50:33,948 --> 00:50:36,042 Drop the emergency shield! 912 00:50:36,116 --> 00:50:37,789 Get that platform stabilized! 913 00:50:37,868 --> 00:50:39,745 Where's Jenning? 914 00:50:47,628 --> 00:50:50,006 You get over here now! Come on, come on! 915 00:50:50,089 --> 00:50:51,529 Howard, where are you going? 916 00:50:51,924 --> 00:50:53,551 Larry, where's Dr. Jenning? 917 00:50:53,634 --> 00:50:55,227 Carter, come here, let me show you this. 918 00:50:55,302 --> 00:50:57,062 He was pre-activating the laser spectroscope. 919 00:50:57,096 --> 00:50:58,097 Uh-huh. 920 00:50:58,180 --> 00:51:00,603 We lost control again and there was another explosion, 921 00:51:00,683 --> 00:51:03,232 and Jenning caught the full force of the blast this time. 922 00:51:03,310 --> 00:51:04,903 Is he all right? Where is he? 923 00:51:04,979 --> 00:51:07,698 You see, the bottom of the spectroscope blew into the wall, 924 00:51:07,773 --> 00:51:09,821 and Jenning just... Just disappeared. 925 00:51:09,900 --> 00:51:14,246 Excuse me, but is this gonna delay my takeoff? 926 00:51:14,321 --> 00:51:16,073 Is that... Is that it? 927 00:51:17,366 --> 00:51:18,663 That's unbelievable! 928 00:51:18,742 --> 00:51:22,167 Yeah. We brought Howard down the first time, but what if... 929 00:51:22,246 --> 00:51:25,625 Oh, my God, Larry, what if we've brought down something else this time? 930 00:51:29,003 --> 00:51:30,801 We're rounding up all the scientists for you in the lab, sir, 931 00:51:30,879 --> 00:51:34,179 but I think you'd better take a look at this other thing first. 932 00:51:34,258 --> 00:51:36,761 A thing, Hanson? 933 00:51:36,844 --> 00:51:39,063 Is that the kind of precise descriptive techniques 934 00:51:39,138 --> 00:51:41,891 they're teaching rookies nowadays? A thing? 935 00:51:41,974 --> 00:51:44,477 I want to know what they're doing with Howard. 936 00:51:44,560 --> 00:51:46,403 Excuse me, are you in charge here? 937 00:51:46,478 --> 00:51:47,479 Yeah, why? 938 00:51:47,563 --> 00:51:49,816 Well, I want to know why they're harassing Howard. 939 00:51:49,898 --> 00:51:50,899 Who's Howard? 940 00:51:50,983 --> 00:51:52,103 He had nothing to do with it. 941 00:51:52,151 --> 00:51:54,370 Howard is just an innocent, um... 942 00:51:54,445 --> 00:51:55,446 Thing? 943 00:51:55,529 --> 00:51:56,781 No. Duck. 944 00:51:57,990 --> 00:52:00,118 Just an innocent duck? 945 00:52:00,200 --> 00:52:02,077 And they wonder why I'm asking for early retirement. 946 00:52:02,161 --> 00:52:03,161 You deal with this. 947 00:52:03,203 --> 00:52:05,001 Wait a second. You can't... 948 00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:07,299 Kirby. You got a thing in here? 949 00:52:07,374 --> 00:52:09,126 Uh, thing. Mmm-hmm. 950 00:52:10,878 --> 00:52:14,098 I've had enough. I want to see my lawyer. 951 00:52:16,050 --> 00:52:18,644 I've got rights, you know. I'm suing. 952 00:52:18,719 --> 00:52:19,720 Yeah. 953 00:52:21,555 --> 00:52:22,795 God damn it, Hanson, get in here 954 00:52:22,848 --> 00:52:24,808 and get this frigging duck suit off this nut. Sir. 955 00:52:25,809 --> 00:52:26,810 Uh-oh. 956 00:52:26,894 --> 00:52:27,861 All right, get a hold of him. 957 00:52:27,936 --> 00:52:30,405 Hey! Hey, let me go, you big gorillas! 958 00:52:30,481 --> 00:52:32,404 On my planet, we never say die, 959 00:52:32,483 --> 00:52:34,577 we say... Not my shorts! 960 00:52:34,652 --> 00:52:35,949 Find that damn zipper! 961 00:52:36,737 --> 00:52:38,990 You perverts! 962 00:52:39,073 --> 00:52:40,245 Uh, lieutenant... 963 00:52:40,324 --> 00:52:41,746 Lieutenant, there's no zipper! 964 00:52:41,825 --> 00:52:43,748 There's no buttons, no Velcro, sir. 965 00:52:43,827 --> 00:52:46,751 I think the suspect's duckness is, like, inborn, sir. 966 00:52:46,830 --> 00:52:48,332 I think he's for real. 967 00:52:48,415 --> 00:52:51,134 If your goons are finished... Let go! 968 00:52:51,210 --> 00:52:52,803 Ow, ow! 969 00:52:53,420 --> 00:52:56,924 I'd like a word with those so-called scientists out there. 970 00:52:57,007 --> 00:52:58,008 Oh, yeah? What about? 971 00:52:58,092 --> 00:53:01,642 About when they can rev up that machine and send me back home. 972 00:53:01,720 --> 00:53:04,473 Listen, Howard, I'm gonna go talk to the scientists out there. 973 00:53:04,556 --> 00:53:06,854 You are gonna go play sitting duck in a jail cell. 974 00:53:06,934 --> 00:53:08,857 Lieutenant, what's the charge, sir? 975 00:53:08,936 --> 00:53:10,438 Illegal alien. 976 00:53:11,730 --> 00:53:12,947 Come on! 977 00:53:13,023 --> 00:53:14,195 I'll get the car. 978 00:53:14,274 --> 00:53:15,867 All right. Oh, a cigar! 979 00:53:15,943 --> 00:53:19,823 All right, that's how it starts, police brutality! 980 00:53:19,905 --> 00:53:21,452 Hey, stop manhandling him! 981 00:53:21,532 --> 00:53:22,909 Hey, you can't come in here. 982 00:53:23,409 --> 00:53:26,003 Ah. Here's another one, already lit. 983 00:53:26,078 --> 00:53:27,830 Oh, nuts! I dropped my cigar! 984 00:53:27,913 --> 00:53:28,914 Fire! 985 00:53:28,997 --> 00:53:30,249 Fire. Oh, jeez, that's all I need. 986 00:53:30,332 --> 00:53:31,629 So long, Copper! 987 00:53:35,129 --> 00:53:37,177 Desperate ducks commit desperate acts. 988 00:53:39,383 --> 00:53:40,384 Freeze! 989 00:53:42,970 --> 00:53:43,971 Book him, Ducko. 990 00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:46,432 Give her the keys to the cuffs, flatfoot. 991 00:53:48,350 --> 00:53:49,693 Yeah. 992 00:53:51,520 --> 00:53:53,272 What are you doing here tonight? You got no ID. 993 00:53:53,355 --> 00:53:54,527 Lieutenant! What? 994 00:53:54,606 --> 00:53:55,983 The duck got away. Ah! 995 00:53:56,066 --> 00:53:57,909 Get up, fool. Get him out of here. 996 00:53:57,985 --> 00:53:59,862 Over here, on the double! 997 00:53:59,945 --> 00:54:01,663 Okay, I want this guy. 998 00:54:01,739 --> 00:54:04,492 The suspect is 3'1" tall. 999 00:54:04,575 --> 00:54:05,918 '3'2", thank you. 1000 00:54:05,993 --> 00:54:08,371 You heard me. He's armed. 1001 00:54:08,454 --> 00:54:11,003 That means he's got a weapon, right? 1002 00:54:11,498 --> 00:54:14,217 That also means he's dangerous. 1003 00:54:14,293 --> 00:54:15,293 Moi? 1004 00:54:15,335 --> 00:54:17,303 Extremely dangerous. 1005 00:54:19,131 --> 00:54:20,633 Shoot to kill! 1006 00:54:23,177 --> 00:54:24,770 Let's move it out! Come on! 1007 00:54:26,346 --> 00:54:27,393 Richard, come with me! 1008 00:54:30,058 --> 00:54:33,278 Okay, let's go. 1009 00:54:40,694 --> 00:54:41,820 No, don't shoot! We give up! 1010 00:54:41,904 --> 00:54:43,702 Time out! We surrender! 1011 00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:47,201 Dr. Jenning? 1012 00:54:47,826 --> 00:54:48,827 What? 1013 00:54:51,955 --> 00:54:53,457 More cops. Come on, hurry! 1014 00:54:53,540 --> 00:54:54,587 What? 1015 00:54:54,666 --> 00:54:55,883 Get over here, doc! 1016 00:54:55,959 --> 00:54:57,302 Howard. Howard. 1017 00:54:57,377 --> 00:54:58,424 What? 1018 00:55:01,965 --> 00:55:04,093 The laser spectroscope malfunctioned again. 1019 00:55:04,176 --> 00:55:06,474 There was a tremendous explosion, 1020 00:55:06,553 --> 00:55:09,272 and then I must've blacked out. 1021 00:55:09,348 --> 00:55:12,101 Then I suddenly find myself out here! 1022 00:55:15,771 --> 00:55:16,897 They after you? 1023 00:55:16,980 --> 00:55:19,324 Does "shoot to kill" sound serious? 1024 00:55:19,733 --> 00:55:21,030 I'm probably finished, too. 1025 00:55:22,528 --> 00:55:24,826 These experiments were unauthorized. 1026 00:55:24,905 --> 00:55:26,248 They're probably gonna blame me... 1027 00:55:29,117 --> 00:55:30,915 Oh, my God. You need help. 1028 00:55:31,286 --> 00:55:33,004 Howard, maybe we all should get out of here, huh? 1029 00:55:33,080 --> 00:55:34,798 You got a car, doc? 1030 00:55:39,753 --> 00:55:42,176 What's wrong with me? There's the back gate. 1031 00:55:42,840 --> 00:55:44,217 Good. There's no cops. 1032 00:55:44,299 --> 00:55:46,347 I don't have a gate key. 1033 00:55:46,426 --> 00:55:48,474 You've got a foot, don't you? So step on it! 1034 00:55:56,395 --> 00:55:59,115 Lieutenant, a car crashed out the back gate headed towards Highway 5! 1035 00:55:59,147 --> 00:56:01,587 All right, get out an all points bulletin right now. Yes, sir! 1036 00:56:02,943 --> 00:56:06,789 How the hell am I gonna explain a manhunt for a duck? 1037 00:56:06,864 --> 00:56:07,956 It's a duck hunt. 1038 00:56:08,031 --> 00:56:11,626 Hanson, please don't. Don't start. Please, please. 1039 00:56:12,661 --> 00:56:14,083 You've got to understand. 1040 00:56:14,162 --> 00:56:15,789 I'm telling you, I saw something! 1041 00:56:15,873 --> 00:56:17,967 Doc, you're in shock from the explosion 1042 00:56:18,041 --> 00:56:19,634 and you're imagining things! Uh-uh. 1043 00:56:19,710 --> 00:56:21,053 Watch where you're going, damn it! 1044 00:56:29,303 --> 00:56:31,305 Listen, an evil has landed. 1045 00:56:31,388 --> 00:56:33,390 The world is in great danger. 1046 00:56:33,473 --> 00:56:35,896 Yeah, it certainly is when you're out on the highway. 1047 00:56:35,976 --> 00:56:37,102 Look out! 1048 00:56:42,858 --> 00:56:44,235 You're gonna get us killed! 1049 00:56:44,318 --> 00:56:48,448 Feels like something inside me, gnawing at my guts. 1050 00:56:48,530 --> 00:56:49,702 What's wrong with me? 1051 00:56:49,781 --> 00:56:51,328 Well, what did you have for lunch? 1052 00:56:52,492 --> 00:56:54,745 Oh, my! Oh, my! 1053 00:56:59,333 --> 00:57:00,550 The road's over there! 1054 00:57:05,839 --> 00:57:07,557 Come on, give us a break! 1055 00:57:07,633 --> 00:57:08,805 Don't close your eyes! 1056 00:57:08,884 --> 00:57:09,885 The pain. 1057 00:57:09,968 --> 00:57:12,562 It's like I'm transforming inside. 1058 00:57:12,638 --> 00:57:15,437 I'm afraid I'm about to become something else. 1059 00:57:15,515 --> 00:57:17,155 Oh, great! Like a sex change or something. 1060 00:57:17,225 --> 00:57:18,852 Somethings growing inside me. 1061 00:57:18,936 --> 00:57:21,815 It's replicating and superseding all my internal organs. 1062 00:57:21,897 --> 00:57:23,240 Well, we'll stop at a bathroom. 1063 00:57:24,524 --> 00:57:25,867 That monstrous shape I saw! 1064 00:57:30,614 --> 00:57:31,615 Jenning! 1065 00:57:31,698 --> 00:57:33,450 It's inside my body! 1066 00:57:33,533 --> 00:57:36,628 This guy's delirious! He's not making any sense! 1067 00:57:36,703 --> 00:57:39,126 It's too late! The end of the world is coming. 1068 00:57:39,206 --> 00:57:42,130 And I will be the cause of it! 1069 00:57:42,209 --> 00:57:43,961 Jenning, slow down! 1070 00:57:44,044 --> 00:57:46,217 Steer, you big yo-yo! Steer! 1071 00:57:52,052 --> 00:57:54,180 Howard! Step on the brake! 1072 00:57:54,262 --> 00:57:55,263 Who, me'? 1073 00:57:55,347 --> 00:57:56,894 No, I'll step on the brake! 1074 00:58:02,396 --> 00:58:03,488 Oh! 1075 00:58:03,563 --> 00:58:05,782 Oh, no! White line! Wrong lane! 1076 00:58:17,411 --> 00:58:19,254 The brake! Push, Beverly! Push! 1077 00:58:19,329 --> 00:58:20,672 I'm trying! 1078 00:58:36,179 --> 00:58:37,772 I'm dead. 1079 00:58:37,848 --> 00:58:39,600 Yes! You are! 1080 00:58:39,683 --> 00:58:41,185 You think that's funny, Jenning? 1081 00:58:41,268 --> 00:58:42,941 I'm not Jenning anymore! 1082 00:58:43,020 --> 00:58:45,193 The transformation is complete! 1083 00:58:45,272 --> 00:58:48,617 I am now someone else. 1084 00:58:48,692 --> 00:58:51,036 Try telling that to your insurance company. 1085 00:58:51,111 --> 00:58:52,738 I think he needs some coffee. 1086 00:58:52,821 --> 00:58:54,073 Come on. 1087 00:59:05,083 --> 00:59:06,676 Oh, after you. 1088 00:59:08,545 --> 00:59:09,888 Uh-oh. 1089 00:59:17,012 --> 00:59:18,013 Hmm'? 1090 00:59:19,306 --> 00:59:20,353 Hey! Sorry. 1091 00:59:20,432 --> 00:59:23,151 This is why I hate the night shift! 1092 00:59:24,478 --> 00:59:27,573 I'm sorry! We don't allow pets on the premises. 1093 00:59:27,647 --> 00:59:30,617 Hey! Have a heart! 1094 00:59:30,692 --> 00:59:32,319 Seeing-eye duck! 1095 00:59:33,570 --> 00:59:35,243 Touching, isn't it? 1096 00:59:35,739 --> 00:59:37,412 Ah! Not so tight! 1097 00:59:37,491 --> 00:59:39,334 What are you doing? Falling in love? 1098 00:59:40,494 --> 00:59:41,916 Sit down. 1099 00:59:41,995 --> 00:59:43,292 I need a beer bad. 1100 00:59:43,371 --> 00:59:44,793 Gotta find a waitress. Yeah. 1101 00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:49,002 Hey, honey! Yo! 1102 00:59:49,086 --> 00:59:50,838 Yeah, I'm coming. 1103 00:59:51,671 --> 00:59:52,843 Here she comes. 1104 00:59:52,923 --> 00:59:54,596 Wow! 1105 00:59:54,674 --> 00:59:56,722 Your kid's costume is really radical! 1106 00:59:56,802 --> 00:59:57,802 I'll bet he's crazy about 1107 00:59:59,513 --> 01:00:00,514 it. 1108 01:00:00,597 --> 01:00:02,144 Yeah. I'm very attached to it. 1109 01:00:03,350 --> 01:00:06,103 Your dad... Sort of in his own space. 1110 01:00:06,186 --> 01:00:07,813 What do you think he'd like to eat? 1111 01:00:07,896 --> 01:00:10,615 I no longer need human food. 1112 01:00:11,525 --> 01:00:12,617 Mmm-mmm. 1113 01:00:12,692 --> 01:00:13,739 I know it's a drag, 1114 01:00:13,819 --> 01:00:15,787 but you're gonna have to order some food if you want to sit here, 1115 01:00:15,862 --> 01:00:17,864 so how about the specials on the menu? 1116 01:00:21,201 --> 01:00:25,081 You are about to witness the end of the old world 1117 01:00:25,163 --> 01:00:27,131 and the birth of the new. 1118 01:00:28,291 --> 01:00:32,671 Hey! Is he, like, one of those TV evangelists or something? 1119 01:00:32,754 --> 01:00:34,222 Or something. 1120 01:00:34,297 --> 01:00:35,674 I'm gonna kill somebody. 1121 01:00:35,757 --> 01:00:36,849 It's okay, Howard. 1122 01:00:36,925 --> 01:00:38,973 Why don't we just have three specials and three beers? 1123 01:00:39,052 --> 01:00:40,224 Right. 1124 01:00:42,973 --> 01:00:44,475 Poor girl. 1125 01:00:44,558 --> 01:00:47,903 Listen! Dr. J? Yoo-hoo! 1126 01:00:48,436 --> 01:00:51,360 If you can tune back into reality for a second. 1127 01:00:51,439 --> 01:00:53,359 I don't understand anything you're talking about. 1128 01:00:53,400 --> 01:00:54,401 Mmm-mmm. 1129 01:00:54,484 --> 01:00:58,580 All I know is I need that laser machine to get me home. 1130 01:00:58,655 --> 01:01:00,407 Is it still working, Jenning? 1131 01:01:00,490 --> 01:01:01,662 Jenning! 1132 01:01:01,741 --> 01:01:06,588 I told you, bird brain, I am not Jenning anymore. 1133 01:01:06,663 --> 01:01:11,089 I am now one of the Dark Overlords of the Universe. 1134 01:01:11,543 --> 01:01:14,171 "Dark Overlord of the Universe"? 1135 01:01:14,254 --> 01:01:16,177 That must be quite a responsibility. 1136 01:01:16,256 --> 01:01:20,807 Tonight, the laser beam hit the Nexus of Sominus. 1137 01:01:20,886 --> 01:01:22,684 What is that? A suburb of Cleveland? 1138 01:01:23,847 --> 01:01:25,849 It lies beyond the planets. 1139 01:01:25,932 --> 01:01:28,936 It is a region of demons 1140 01:01:29,019 --> 01:01:33,195 to which we Dark Overlords were exiled eons ago. 1141 01:01:33,273 --> 01:01:35,617 I hope you're getting all this. 1142 01:01:35,692 --> 01:01:39,367 Howard, what I'm getting is that this man is very, very sick. 1143 01:01:39,446 --> 01:01:42,416 Just as you were brought down here accidentally, 1144 01:01:42,490 --> 01:01:48,463 tonight the laser beam released me from that region of demons 1145 01:01:48,538 --> 01:01:52,384 and pulled me down into that lab. 1146 01:01:52,459 --> 01:01:53,961 Small universe. 1147 01:01:54,711 --> 01:01:59,217 During the explosion, I entered Jennings body. 1148 01:02:00,091 --> 01:02:01,183 So... 1149 01:02:04,179 --> 01:02:06,898 I have disguised my true form, 1150 01:02:06,973 --> 01:02:12,821 which would be considered hideous and revolting here. 1151 01:02:14,314 --> 01:02:16,442 Mmm-hmm. Lucky for the people eating. 1152 01:02:19,361 --> 01:02:20,829 You ordered three specials. What's wrong? 1153 01:02:20,946 --> 01:02:25,747 This will mean the extinction of all existing life forms. 1154 01:02:26,493 --> 01:02:27,836 You haven't even tasted it yet. 1155 01:02:28,036 --> 01:02:30,664 What do you think? I'm into cannibalism or something? 1156 01:02:30,747 --> 01:02:34,047 Hey! Are we, like, all in the same discussion here? 1157 01:02:34,125 --> 01:02:35,752 I'll give you a hint, doll. 1158 01:02:35,835 --> 01:02:38,839 What's white, ovoid and always reminds me of my birthday? 1159 01:02:38,922 --> 01:02:39,923 I don't know. 1160 01:02:40,006 --> 01:02:42,179 The eggs! Get 'em out of here! 1161 01:02:42,842 --> 01:02:44,594 Gosh! You know... 1162 01:02:44,678 --> 01:02:47,522 Hostility is, like, a psychic boomerang. 1163 01:02:48,431 --> 01:02:50,274 I can't believe this planet. 1164 01:02:50,350 --> 01:02:52,444 Fried eggs? Yuck! 1165 01:02:52,519 --> 01:02:54,567 Just bring the beer! 1166 01:02:54,646 --> 01:02:56,148 Howard! Howard! 1167 01:03:10,412 --> 01:03:11,629 What happened? 1168 01:03:11,705 --> 01:03:12,957 How the hell did you do that? 1169 01:03:13,039 --> 01:03:14,791 My powers are growing! 1170 01:03:14,874 --> 01:03:15,875 Watch out! 1171 01:03:15,959 --> 01:03:17,461 It is time now. 1172 01:03:17,544 --> 01:03:18,545 What's that? 1173 01:03:18,628 --> 01:03:20,130 It is the code key. 1174 01:03:20,213 --> 01:03:23,433 It will activate the laser spectroscope when I use it tonight 1175 01:03:23,508 --> 01:03:26,478 to bring down the other Dark Overlords. 1176 01:03:26,553 --> 01:03:27,554 The others? 1177 01:03:27,637 --> 01:03:30,015 Now he's got a whole gang. Well, screw 'em. 1178 01:03:30,098 --> 01:03:31,645 I got dibs on the laser first! 1179 01:03:31,725 --> 01:03:33,944 Give me that code key. That's my ticket home! 1180 01:03:42,819 --> 01:03:44,162 Look at his hand! 1181 01:03:44,237 --> 01:03:45,864 That's nothing. Look at his face! 1182 01:03:45,947 --> 01:03:51,374 Yes. Soon the Dark Overlords will engulf the Earth. 1183 01:03:51,453 --> 01:03:54,832 Nothing human will remain here. 1184 01:03:54,914 --> 01:03:57,633 Yeah? Well, nothing duck's remaining here, either. 1185 01:03:57,709 --> 01:03:58,709 Move! We're going! 1186 01:03:58,752 --> 01:04:00,004 You'll get the check? 1187 01:04:01,171 --> 01:04:02,764 Hate to eat and run. 1188 01:04:02,839 --> 01:04:03,886 Hello there. 1189 01:04:03,965 --> 01:04:05,217 Get out of the way. 1190 01:04:05,300 --> 01:04:06,722 Hey, look at the talking duck. 1191 01:04:06,801 --> 01:04:07,802 Bug off! 1192 01:04:07,886 --> 01:04:10,105 Lord! What is that? 1193 01:04:10,180 --> 01:04:12,228 You jackass! He's a ventriloquist. 1194 01:04:12,307 --> 01:04:14,810 This guy here's doing the talking, and this here's the dummy. 1195 01:04:14,893 --> 01:04:16,315 Go ahead. Say something, dummy. 1196 01:04:16,394 --> 01:04:19,273 You might not want to hear what I'll say, bozo. 1197 01:04:20,440 --> 01:04:22,784 Did you make him say that, jerk-off? 1198 01:04:22,901 --> 01:04:24,528 On! 1199 01:04:24,611 --> 01:04:27,455 Leave him alone. He was just in an industrial accident. 1200 01:04:28,615 --> 01:04:29,615 Take a hike, cowboy! 1201 01:04:29,657 --> 01:04:31,580 - You're a dead duck! - Hey! 1202 01:04:31,659 --> 01:04:33,502 What's this? The key to your duckmobile? 1203 01:04:33,578 --> 01:04:35,205 Give me that or you're gonna be sorry. 1204 01:04:35,288 --> 01:04:37,632 You better watch out! He's a master of quack fu! 1205 01:04:37,707 --> 01:04:39,129 I'll quack fu him! 1206 01:04:40,085 --> 01:04:41,132 Doink! 1207 01:04:41,836 --> 01:04:42,962 Going down! 1208 01:04:43,046 --> 01:04:44,593 Come on, Bev, run! 1209 01:04:44,672 --> 01:04:46,219 Oh, nuts! Going up! 1210 01:04:46,299 --> 01:04:48,142 Ow! Ow! Ow! I'm sorry! 1211 01:04:50,428 --> 01:04:51,896 Howard! Howard! 1212 01:04:53,056 --> 01:04:54,308 Quack! 1213 01:04:54,391 --> 01:04:56,143 This one's for you, quacker! 1214 01:04:57,435 --> 01:04:58,732 Good shot! 1215 01:04:58,812 --> 01:05:01,691 Another hungry customer! Yeah! 1216 01:05:01,773 --> 01:05:02,773 You! 1217 01:05:02,816 --> 01:05:05,114 Toro! Toro! Olé! 1218 01:05:06,027 --> 01:05:08,405 I'm gonna get you, you dumb duck! 1219 01:05:09,781 --> 01:05:11,203 Airborne! 1220 01:05:14,369 --> 01:05:15,916 You damn nut! Go away! 1221 01:05:15,995 --> 01:05:18,043 Call the police! Not the police. 1222 01:05:18,123 --> 01:05:19,123 Call somebody else. 1223 01:05:19,165 --> 01:05:20,205 They're gonna hurt Howard. 1224 01:05:20,250 --> 01:05:22,423 An evil unlike any you can imagine 1225 01:05:22,502 --> 01:05:25,130 is about to engulf the Earth. 1226 01:05:25,213 --> 01:05:26,465 Oh, no, no. 1227 01:05:26,548 --> 01:05:28,016 We have fights in here all the time. 1228 01:05:28,091 --> 01:05:31,846 Come and get it! Your order's ready! 1229 01:05:32,512 --> 01:05:33,889 You gonna just sit there? 1230 01:05:33,972 --> 01:05:35,645 She took my eggs. Oh! 1231 01:05:35,723 --> 01:05:37,145 One special! 1232 01:05:38,351 --> 01:05:40,353 Howard! Beverly! 1233 01:05:41,020 --> 01:05:42,020 Howard! 1234 01:05:42,063 --> 01:05:45,317 Jenning! I could use some help here, buddy! 1235 01:05:45,400 --> 01:05:46,947 Come on! Let's get out of here! 1236 01:05:49,654 --> 01:05:51,122 Yeah! 1237 01:05:51,197 --> 01:05:52,449 Howard! 1238 01:05:52,949 --> 01:05:54,229 You're not getting away now, 1239 01:05:54,284 --> 01:05:55,410 you stupid little bird! 1240 01:05:55,493 --> 01:05:56,773 Now you're ruffling my feathers! 1241 01:05:56,828 --> 01:05:58,455 Put me down, you big hairless ape! 1242 01:05:58,538 --> 01:06:00,381 Put me down right now! 1243 01:06:00,790 --> 01:06:01,962 Put him down! 1244 01:06:02,041 --> 01:06:05,215 Howard may be a duck, but you people are animals! 1245 01:06:05,879 --> 01:06:07,131 He's my boyfriend! 1246 01:06:09,966 --> 01:06:11,639 That's disgusting. 1247 01:06:11,718 --> 01:06:12,810 Yeah! 1248 01:06:12,886 --> 01:06:14,638 You're not making me proud to be a human! 1249 01:06:14,721 --> 01:06:17,019 Let me just pay the check and I'm out of here! 1250 01:06:18,725 --> 01:06:19,897 I can't believe you're just sitting here! 1251 01:06:19,976 --> 01:06:21,569 Look what they're doing to Howard! 1252 01:06:22,729 --> 01:06:24,072 Oh, jeez! 1253 01:06:24,147 --> 01:06:25,364 - Chicken-fried! - Duck! 1254 01:06:25,440 --> 01:06:27,317 Where's the SPCA when you need 'em? 1255 01:06:27,400 --> 01:06:28,652 I am not amused! 1256 01:06:28,735 --> 01:06:31,329 I'm gonna barbecue your bill, bird! 1257 01:06:31,404 --> 01:06:33,998 Oh, great duck in heaven, is this the end of Howard? 1258 01:06:34,073 --> 01:06:35,325 There's gonna be more violence! 1259 01:06:35,408 --> 01:06:36,660 I hate violence! 1260 01:06:36,743 --> 01:06:38,666 You gotta go in there and beat 'em up! 1261 01:06:38,745 --> 01:06:40,292 Jenning! Jenning! 1262 01:06:40,371 --> 01:06:42,499 Don't just sit there! This is serious! 1263 01:06:42,582 --> 01:06:44,175 They're gonna cook me! 1264 01:06:44,250 --> 01:06:45,297 Take that! 1265 01:06:45,376 --> 01:06:47,003 Stuff him! 1266 01:06:47,086 --> 01:06:48,588 Any last words? 1267 01:06:49,839 --> 01:06:52,012 Yeah. Jenning! 1268 01:06:52,717 --> 01:06:54,139 He's my favorite duck. 1269 01:06:54,219 --> 01:06:55,971 You hardly know him. 1270 01:06:56,054 --> 01:06:58,022 Jenning! They're seasoning me! 1271 01:06:58,097 --> 01:06:59,849 Wait. You better let me up. 1272 01:06:59,933 --> 01:07:01,276 You don't want to get my friend angry. 1273 01:07:01,351 --> 01:07:03,274 Oh, yeah? Why? 1274 01:07:03,353 --> 01:07:06,197 Because he's one of the Dark Overlords of the Universe 1275 01:07:06,272 --> 01:07:09,196 and he can destroy you and the Earth. Everything! 1276 01:07:12,278 --> 01:07:14,701 Yeah. Well, I didn't buy it at first, either. 1277 01:07:14,781 --> 01:07:16,533 Look! They're laughing at you! 1278 01:07:16,616 --> 01:07:18,914 And they've got Mr. Code Key. 1279 01:07:21,246 --> 01:07:23,123 Oh, my God. 1280 01:07:24,457 --> 01:07:25,800 One, two... 1281 01:07:25,875 --> 01:07:28,173 Wait a minute! Jenning! 1282 01:07:28,253 --> 01:07:31,473 Oh, look! I warned you! Here he comes! 1283 01:07:47,480 --> 01:07:48,697 He must have ate the chili. 1284 01:07:49,649 --> 01:07:51,492 Release the small waterfowl. 1285 01:07:54,445 --> 01:07:56,368 Bring me the code key, Howard. 1286 01:07:56,447 --> 01:07:57,744 Right. The code key. 1287 01:07:57,824 --> 01:08:00,418 You heard him. Cut me loose. 1288 01:08:00,493 --> 01:08:04,293 Sounds like a bunch of bullpucky to me! 1289 01:08:06,499 --> 01:08:07,876 Oh, my God! 1290 01:08:22,307 --> 01:08:24,810 Yikes! Oh, my God! 1291 01:08:33,359 --> 01:08:34,406 Are you okay, Howard? 1292 01:08:35,153 --> 01:08:36,154 Yes. 1293 01:08:36,696 --> 01:08:37,743 Enough of this crap! 1294 01:08:37,822 --> 01:08:39,039 You! Out of here! 1295 01:08:41,367 --> 01:08:44,667 If you can't take the heat, get out of that kitchen! 1296 01:08:51,669 --> 01:08:52,795 Where's the code key? 1297 01:08:52,879 --> 01:08:55,382 It's closing time! 1298 01:09:00,428 --> 01:09:01,771 The code key! 1299 01:09:01,846 --> 01:09:04,895 It's not nice to fool with a Dark Overlord. 1300 01:09:12,190 --> 01:09:15,160 - Let me out! - Let me out of here! 1301 01:09:20,698 --> 01:09:23,167 They get the point, Jenning! 1302 01:09:23,242 --> 01:09:25,244 Move! Get out of the way! 1303 01:09:37,548 --> 01:09:38,549 Now's our chance. 1304 01:09:38,633 --> 01:09:40,556 Yeah. Come on. This way. 1305 01:09:42,762 --> 01:09:44,514 Cut it out, Howard. 1306 01:09:45,473 --> 01:09:46,474 Ah! Ah! Ah! 1307 01:09:47,642 --> 01:09:48,643 Going somewhere? 1308 01:09:49,268 --> 01:09:51,270 Yeah. Without you. 1309 01:09:56,943 --> 01:09:58,411 Hey! 1310 01:10:04,200 --> 01:10:06,202 Move the table out of the way! 1311 01:10:06,285 --> 01:10:07,845 Oh, God, it's stuck! 1312 01:10:07,912 --> 01:10:09,710 Uh-oh. What's wrong? 1313 01:10:13,167 --> 01:10:14,510 Howard, get down from there! 1314 01:10:15,878 --> 01:10:17,346 Like I'm doing this on purpose! 1315 01:10:17,422 --> 01:10:19,299 Give me the code key! 1316 01:10:19,382 --> 01:10:20,850 Oh, yeah? What if I don't? 1317 01:10:22,301 --> 01:10:24,520 Ouch! Can't you take a joke? 1318 01:10:24,595 --> 01:10:26,347 Jeez! You broke my head! 1319 01:10:38,025 --> 01:10:41,950 I will now bring down the other Dark Overlords. 1320 01:10:42,029 --> 01:10:43,622 Hey! What about me? 1321 01:10:54,500 --> 01:10:55,501 Oh! 1322 01:10:56,043 --> 01:10:57,841 You filthy scum bucket! 1323 01:11:20,359 --> 01:11:21,406 Howard! 1324 01:11:23,529 --> 01:11:25,202 No! Beverly! 1325 01:11:31,704 --> 01:11:32,705 Beverly! 1326 01:11:40,546 --> 01:11:41,547 No! Look out! 1327 01:11:44,550 --> 01:11:46,803 You killed him! You killed him! 1328 01:11:51,057 --> 01:11:54,436 Beverly! I'll find you. 1329 01:12:02,735 --> 01:12:04,578 I need your body! 1330 01:12:05,112 --> 01:12:06,955 Creep! I've heard that one before! 1331 01:12:07,031 --> 01:12:10,501 The Dark Overlords cannot exist on this planet 1332 01:12:10,576 --> 01:12:15,798 unless they grow inside a human body. 1333 01:12:16,290 --> 01:12:17,712 Oh, God. No. 1334 01:12:22,839 --> 01:12:24,512 I hurt! 1335 01:12:24,590 --> 01:12:26,012 Need energy! 1336 01:12:29,929 --> 01:12:31,272 Watch out! 1337 01:12:34,600 --> 01:12:36,648 More energy! 1338 01:12:46,696 --> 01:12:48,744 That's the grossest! I'm gonna puke! 1339 01:12:55,997 --> 01:12:57,715 Oh, God! 1340 01:13:12,972 --> 01:13:15,395 All this I explained to the first officer... 1341 01:13:15,474 --> 01:13:18,944 There was this big guy and this girl and this little kid. 1342 01:13:19,020 --> 01:13:20,112 At least, I thought it was a little kid. 1343 01:13:20,187 --> 01:13:21,188 Uh-huh. 1344 01:13:21,272 --> 01:13:23,115 Then I flashed on reality, right? Bam! 1345 01:13:23,190 --> 01:13:24,817 Halloween's not till next month. 1346 01:13:25,568 --> 01:13:28,242 I know my rights! Where's my baseball cap? 1347 01:13:28,321 --> 01:13:29,447 Shut up! 1348 01:13:29,530 --> 01:13:30,782 Fascist! 1349 01:13:33,326 --> 01:13:34,828 Oh. No handle. 1350 01:13:37,496 --> 01:13:39,123 Philsie! 1351 01:13:40,750 --> 01:13:42,002 Philsie! 1352 01:13:46,672 --> 01:13:49,050 Philsie! It's me! 1353 01:13:53,054 --> 01:13:54,852 Howard! 1354 01:14:03,314 --> 01:14:05,112 Howard, I got arrested at the plant. 1355 01:14:05,191 --> 01:14:06,613 I'm gonna have a criminal record. 1356 01:14:06,692 --> 01:14:09,070 Ah. Jenning kidnapped Beverly. 1357 01:14:09,153 --> 01:14:11,281 He's taking her back to that science lab. 1358 01:14:11,364 --> 01:14:12,911 What? Why? 1359 01:14:12,990 --> 01:14:14,333 He's some kind of monster. 1360 01:14:14,408 --> 01:14:16,285 He's gonna bring down more of his buddies. 1361 01:14:16,369 --> 01:14:19,088 He's got big plans, like taking over Earth. 1362 01:14:19,163 --> 01:14:21,507 Philsie, we gotta get out of here. 1363 01:14:21,582 --> 01:14:24,756 Howard.. This door doesn't have any handles. 1364 01:14:24,835 --> 01:14:26,587 Get a rock or something, break this window. 1365 01:14:26,671 --> 01:14:27,671 Rock? 1366 01:14:27,713 --> 01:14:28,885 Window. 1367 01:14:30,132 --> 01:14:32,476 Let me try the door first. 1368 01:14:34,387 --> 01:14:35,730 Oh. 1369 01:14:36,389 --> 01:14:37,515 How are we getting out of here? 1370 01:14:37,598 --> 01:14:38,850 Come on. 1371 01:14:39,725 --> 01:14:41,602 Philsie, where are we going? 1372 01:14:46,273 --> 01:14:47,820 Hey, over here! 1373 01:14:50,069 --> 01:14:51,286 It'll be dawn soon. 1374 01:14:51,946 --> 01:14:54,165 Hey, let's steal a cop car. 1375 01:14:54,240 --> 01:14:56,459 Don't you think that'd be a little conspicuous? 1376 01:14:56,534 --> 01:14:57,581 Hitchhike. Cab. 1377 01:14:58,244 --> 01:14:59,837 What is that? 1378 01:14:59,912 --> 01:15:01,209 Huh? 1379 01:15:02,999 --> 01:15:04,672 Jeez! It looks like an airplane. 1380 01:15:04,750 --> 01:15:07,253 Well, it will be. We can put it together in no time. 1381 01:15:07,336 --> 01:15:10,340 Somebody's weekend hobby is gonna get us back to that lab. 1382 01:15:10,423 --> 01:15:12,801 Hey, we've got a saying on my planet, 1383 01:15:12,883 --> 01:15:16,353 if God intended us to fly, he wouldn't have taken away our wings. 1384 01:15:16,429 --> 01:15:18,789 That's really profound, Howard. Could you find the tool box? 1385 01:15:19,265 --> 01:15:21,563 Yeah. I know why you want a tool box. 1386 01:15:21,642 --> 01:15:22,985 You got a screw loose. 1387 01:15:40,536 --> 01:15:41,537 Power. 1388 01:15:43,456 --> 01:15:44,673 Oh, no. 1389 01:16:03,642 --> 01:16:05,644 They just spotted the duck and the kid. Where? 1390 01:16:05,728 --> 01:16:07,025 Behind the warehouse next door. 1391 01:16:07,104 --> 01:16:08,230 They're about to take off. 1392 01:16:08,314 --> 01:16:09,736 What do you mean, take off? 1393 01:16:10,983 --> 01:16:12,735 It's not doing anything. Cops! 1394 01:16:13,986 --> 01:16:15,533 Throttle! Push forward on the throttle! 1395 01:16:15,613 --> 01:16:16,785 Okay. Yeah. 1396 01:16:16,864 --> 01:16:18,992 Full throttle! Full throttle! 1397 01:16:20,117 --> 01:16:21,117 Cops, Philsie! 1398 01:16:21,160 --> 01:16:22,161 180, Howard! 1399 01:16:22,244 --> 01:16:23,837 Right! 1400 01:16:23,913 --> 01:16:24,960 Whoa! 1401 01:16:25,039 --> 01:16:26,291 Whoa! 1402 01:16:26,373 --> 01:16:27,374 Run away! 1403 01:16:32,505 --> 01:16:33,802 There's cops everywhere! 1404 01:16:33,881 --> 01:16:36,350 No! in the air, Howard! Up! Up! 1405 01:16:37,635 --> 01:16:38,636 Look out! 1406 01:16:41,514 --> 01:16:44,484 Prepare for takeoff! 1407 01:16:52,191 --> 01:16:53,784 Whoa! No! No! 1408 01:17:00,658 --> 01:17:03,081 Follow them. Bring them down and bring them back! 1409 01:17:05,830 --> 01:17:07,127 I want that duck 1410 01:17:08,165 --> 01:17:09,212 dead or alive. 1411 01:17:09,875 --> 01:17:11,673 It's south-southwest, Howard! 1412 01:17:11,752 --> 01:17:12,878 What? 1413 01:17:13,921 --> 01:17:16,390 That way! Stay low! 1414 01:17:16,465 --> 01:17:19,514 Beverly' I'm coming to get you, sweetheart! 1415 01:17:44,660 --> 01:17:47,004 Help me! Help! 1416 01:17:47,079 --> 01:17:49,127 Somebody help me! Please help me! 1417 01:17:49,206 --> 01:17:50,332 Please watch your step. 1418 01:17:50,416 --> 01:17:51,884 I think you're all gonna find this very interesting. 1419 01:17:51,959 --> 01:17:53,051 You know, honestly, Congressmen, 1420 01:17:53,127 --> 01:17:55,505 this Three Mile Island, China syndrome meltdown stuff, 1421 01:17:55,588 --> 01:17:56,589 that's all history. 1422 01:17:56,672 --> 01:17:57,719 The only meltdowns around here 1423 01:17:57,798 --> 01:17:59,675 are the cheese sandwiches in the toaster oven. 1424 01:18:04,680 --> 01:18:05,852 Wow! 1425 01:18:05,931 --> 01:18:09,276 These Washington guys take a real beating on these junkets. 1426 01:18:09,351 --> 01:18:11,319 Our nuclear reactor, 1427 01:18:11,395 --> 01:18:15,696 pumping out 1 million kilowatts of power. 1428 01:18:15,774 --> 01:18:18,778 One million kilowatts. 1429 01:18:21,280 --> 01:18:22,623 Power. 1430 01:18:22,698 --> 01:18:24,450 Yes, sir. 1431 01:18:24,533 --> 01:18:27,082 Listen, I think we could all use a cup of coffee. 1432 01:18:27,161 --> 01:18:29,914 Help! Somebody help me, please! 1433 01:18:29,997 --> 01:18:31,294 Help! 1434 01:19:12,915 --> 01:19:14,758 Let's go, let's go. Come on, come on, come on! 1435 01:19:28,264 --> 01:19:30,642 I feel much better. 1436 01:19:36,772 --> 01:19:39,366 No, no, not that! Right pedal! Right pedal! 1437 01:19:42,361 --> 01:19:43,783 Damn it! That was too close! 1438 01:19:43,862 --> 01:19:44,909 I'm just learning, here. 1439 01:19:44,989 --> 01:19:47,287 Howard, in prehistoric times, you flew. 1440 01:19:47,366 --> 01:19:49,835 Fly, Howard! Find your instincts. 1441 01:19:49,910 --> 01:19:51,912 Trust your birdness! Fly! 1442 01:19:51,996 --> 01:19:52,997 Yikes! 1443 01:20:08,721 --> 01:20:10,849 Howard, pull up! Pull up! 1444 01:20:15,728 --> 01:20:16,820 Touchdown! 1445 01:20:16,895 --> 01:20:19,899 Great landing, Howard, but this isn't gonna get us to the lab. 1446 01:20:19,982 --> 01:20:22,076 You said to follow my instincts. 1447 01:20:22,151 --> 01:20:24,245 This is my nesting instinct. 1448 01:20:25,988 --> 01:20:26,989 Oh, no! 1449 01:20:28,407 --> 01:20:29,704 I'm flying blind here! 1450 01:20:29,783 --> 01:20:32,252 Shut up! You're not flying at all! 1451 01:20:32,328 --> 01:20:33,329 Let her rip! 1452 01:20:33,412 --> 01:20:34,584 Bombs away! 1453 01:20:40,252 --> 01:20:42,300 Pull it up, Howard! We're running out of land! 1454 01:20:42,379 --> 01:20:44,006 Oh! One step ahead! 1455 01:20:44,089 --> 01:20:45,591 Watch out! 1456 01:21:12,284 --> 01:21:15,037 Death from the skies to all duck hunters! 1457 01:21:16,622 --> 01:21:17,919 Tora! Tora! Tora! 1458 01:21:19,375 --> 01:21:21,548 Vengeance is mine! Yeah! 1459 01:21:21,627 --> 01:21:22,628 Howard! 1460 01:21:23,629 --> 01:21:24,972 Banzai! 1461 01:21:39,853 --> 01:21:42,072 Slow down! Slow down there! 1462 01:21:43,190 --> 01:21:44,533 Hey, you! Pull over here! 1463 01:21:55,911 --> 01:21:57,663 This is a smog device inspection. 1464 01:21:59,498 --> 01:22:00,624 And I need... 1465 01:22:00,707 --> 01:22:02,084 Shut off the engine! It is off! 1466 01:22:02,167 --> 01:22:03,339 Somebody's pushing. 1467 01:22:07,005 --> 01:22:08,765 Whiplash! Whiplash! I'm gonna call my lawyer! 1468 01:22:08,799 --> 01:22:10,722 Shut it down! Shut it down! 1469 01:22:10,843 --> 01:22:12,323 What the hell's wrong with you'? No... 1470 01:22:14,054 --> 01:22:15,647 I want to see your license, Jack. 1471 01:22:15,973 --> 01:22:17,725 I have no license. 1472 01:22:18,350 --> 01:22:21,024 I am not Jack. 1473 01:22:42,040 --> 01:22:44,714 Come on, come on! Get out of here! 1474 01:23:01,393 --> 01:23:03,737 Smog inspection. 1475 01:23:13,447 --> 01:23:14,573 What happened? 1476 01:23:17,784 --> 01:23:19,752 We gotta get out of here! 1477 01:23:24,374 --> 01:23:26,047 Damage report, Philsie. 1478 01:23:26,126 --> 01:23:30,131 Fuel hose is busted! Rudder is wasted! 1479 01:23:30,214 --> 01:23:33,058 Basically, we're dying here, Howard. 1480 01:23:36,220 --> 01:23:37,346 I'm bailing out. 1481 01:23:37,429 --> 01:23:39,147 No, you're not! You're gonna get up there 1482 01:23:39,223 --> 01:23:41,317 and fix this lawn mower now! 1483 01:23:51,193 --> 01:23:52,786 Philsie, how's it going? 1484 01:23:52,861 --> 01:23:54,989 Getting close! I'm on top of it! 1485 01:23:55,072 --> 01:23:56,369 Good. 1486 01:24:00,160 --> 01:24:02,834 Relax, Howard. I've almost got it. 1487 01:24:11,380 --> 01:24:12,552 Uh-oh. 1488 01:24:17,678 --> 01:24:19,851 Philsie, I did a loop-the-loop! 1489 01:24:19,930 --> 01:24:21,432 I'm getting good at this! 1490 01:24:21,515 --> 01:24:22,892 I'm... 1491 01:24:22,975 --> 01:24:24,272 Hello? 1492 01:24:24,351 --> 01:24:25,398 Howard! 1493 01:24:25,477 --> 01:24:26,478 Huh? 1494 01:24:27,187 --> 01:24:28,814 Up, Howard! 1495 01:24:29,523 --> 01:24:30,900 Up! 1496 01:24:30,983 --> 01:24:32,985 Aw, jeez! I thought I lost you. 1497 01:24:34,820 --> 01:24:37,539 Philsie, this is no time for water sports. 1498 01:24:37,614 --> 01:24:39,582 I'm just kidding, big guy. 1499 01:24:53,338 --> 01:24:55,466 You scum, let me go! 1500 01:25:07,352 --> 01:25:09,104 Philsie, get back up here! 1501 01:25:09,187 --> 01:25:11,815 I'm trying! 1502 01:25:11,898 --> 01:25:13,821 No! No! Don't shoot! 1503 01:25:13,900 --> 01:25:16,369 I'm an innocent hostage! The duck's a lunatic! 1504 01:25:16,445 --> 01:25:17,617 What? 1505 01:25:17,696 --> 01:25:20,791 He's a duck terrorist! He hijacked the plane! 1506 01:25:21,867 --> 01:25:22,867 Whoa! 1507 01:25:24,161 --> 01:25:25,162 Ahh! 1508 01:25:25,245 --> 01:25:26,246 Howard, pull it up! 1509 01:25:34,004 --> 01:25:35,347 Welcome back, Philsie! 1510 01:25:35,422 --> 01:25:37,550 Thanks! It's great to be back, Howard! 1511 01:25:40,177 --> 01:25:42,145 Would you watch the road, damn it? 1512 01:25:42,220 --> 01:25:45,690 Hey, another car. No big deal. 1513 01:25:45,766 --> 01:25:50,522 Yes! Big deal! Big, big, big, big, big... Choc-choc! Big deal! 1514 01:25:56,610 --> 01:25:57,611 No wings. 1515 01:25:57,694 --> 01:25:58,911 Welcome to the club! 1516 01:26:00,072 --> 01:26:01,073 Coming through! 1517 01:26:08,121 --> 01:26:09,873 That was a lot of fun. I'd like to get off now. 1518 01:26:09,956 --> 01:26:11,924 Slow down. 1519 01:26:13,585 --> 01:26:15,303 Slow down! 1520 01:26:15,379 --> 01:26:18,007 Relax. I'll just throttle this baby back. 1521 01:26:18,590 --> 01:26:19,591 Yikes! 1522 01:26:20,842 --> 01:26:22,765 Philsie, I'd better tell you now. What? 1523 01:26:22,844 --> 01:26:24,391 I can't swim! 1524 01:26:24,471 --> 01:26:26,223 Oh, great! 1525 01:26:32,312 --> 01:26:33,609 Philsie, help! 1526 01:26:33,689 --> 01:26:36,317 Philsie, help me! 1527 01:26:36,400 --> 01:26:38,528 I never heard of a duck that couldn't swim. 1528 01:26:38,610 --> 01:26:40,283 Shut up and save me! 1529 01:26:40,946 --> 01:26:42,573 We've been through hell! 1530 01:26:42,656 --> 01:26:46,957 Now, if there is some kind of monster in here... Howard, this is crazy! 1531 01:26:47,035 --> 01:26:49,879 Phil, no duck is an island. 1532 01:26:49,955 --> 01:26:52,583 And if fate sent me here to save Earth, 1533 01:26:52,666 --> 01:26:55,294 then Howard the duck is ready to fight. 1534 01:26:58,505 --> 01:26:59,631 Damn. 1535 01:27:09,349 --> 01:27:10,851 Yikes. 1536 01:27:10,934 --> 01:27:12,402 He's starting the spectroscope. 1537 01:27:12,477 --> 01:27:15,981 Jeez. He's gonna bring down another Dark Overlord. 1538 01:27:16,064 --> 01:27:17,611 We gotta get Beverly out of there. 1539 01:27:17,691 --> 01:27:19,364 Hey, take it easy, Conan. 1540 01:27:19,443 --> 01:27:20,660 What are you gonna fight him with'? 1541 01:27:20,736 --> 01:27:22,238 We gotta find some kind of... 1542 01:27:22,320 --> 01:27:25,369 Wait. Carter showed me something here once that might do it, 1543 01:27:25,449 --> 01:27:26,746 if we can find it. 1544 01:27:28,201 --> 01:27:29,748 You'll never get away with this. 1545 01:27:32,164 --> 01:27:35,464 We'll find it! Come on, Philsie. 1546 01:27:36,668 --> 01:27:38,420 You don't scare me! 1547 01:27:42,966 --> 01:27:44,218 Oh! 1548 01:27:46,511 --> 01:27:50,106 Wait. Defense research! This is it! This is it! 1549 01:27:50,182 --> 01:27:51,399 This is locked! 1550 01:28:01,777 --> 01:28:02,949 Okay, I know where it is. 1551 01:28:03,028 --> 01:28:05,952 It's on the right or the left or the... 1552 01:28:06,031 --> 01:28:10,161 Ah! There it is. The neutron disintegrator. 1553 01:28:12,204 --> 01:28:13,205 Hmm... 1554 01:28:13,288 --> 01:28:15,541 And a big lock. 1555 01:28:15,624 --> 01:28:16,921 Rats. 1556 01:28:18,418 --> 01:28:20,841 Okay. All right. 1557 01:28:20,921 --> 01:28:22,844 Turn me into a Dark Overlord. 1558 01:28:22,923 --> 01:28:24,846 I'll still spit in your wormy face. 1559 01:28:29,596 --> 01:28:31,974 Welcome to Dynatechnics. 1560 01:28:32,057 --> 01:28:34,185 Authorized personnel only. 1561 01:28:34,267 --> 01:28:36,269 Please insert code key. 1562 01:28:36,353 --> 01:28:38,321 Authorized personnel only. 1563 01:28:39,272 --> 01:28:41,616 Thank you. Hello, Dr. Jenning. 1564 01:28:41,691 --> 01:28:45,161 Please select your target and enter target coordinates. 1565 01:28:47,239 --> 01:28:48,331 Thank you. 1566 01:28:48,406 --> 01:28:52,661 Laser spectroscope is now targeting the Nexus of Sominus. 1567 01:28:52,744 --> 01:28:54,337 Targeting is in process. 1568 01:29:03,755 --> 01:29:05,302 Come on, Philsie. Hit it harder! 1569 01:29:06,383 --> 01:29:08,226 Way to go! Yeah! 1570 01:29:09,177 --> 01:29:10,349 Hurry up. 1571 01:29:10,428 --> 01:29:12,522 The neutron disintegrator was developed for the army 1572 01:29:12,597 --> 01:29:14,770 until cost over-runs became really embarrassing. 1573 01:29:14,850 --> 01:29:16,022 Can it stop Jenning? 1574 01:29:16,101 --> 01:29:17,102 Theoretically, yes. 1575 01:29:17,185 --> 01:29:18,778 Unfortunately, it's never been tested. 1576 01:29:22,774 --> 01:29:24,697 Attention all personnel, 1577 01:29:24,776 --> 01:29:26,699 please clear the upper bay stations 1578 01:29:26,778 --> 01:29:28,780 while laser doors ave opening;. 1579 01:29:30,991 --> 01:29:33,710 Please initiate spectroscope extension. 1580 01:29:38,373 --> 01:29:40,375 Target is now locked. 1581 01:29:40,458 --> 01:29:42,301 Target is now locked. 1582 01:29:46,047 --> 01:29:48,175 Is this, like, stick shift or automatic? 1583 01:29:48,258 --> 01:29:52,354 Howard, you have to get into firing range without him seeing you. 1584 01:29:52,429 --> 01:29:55,979 Right. I'll sneak up on him, and then I'll blast him. 1585 01:29:56,391 --> 01:29:59,110 Do you wish to bring the laser to full power? 1586 01:29:59,185 --> 01:30:03,315 Dr. Jenning, I repeat, do you wish to bring the lase: To full power? 1587 01:30:05,150 --> 01:30:06,572 Thank you. 1588 01:30:08,403 --> 01:30:09,746 What's this do? 1589 01:30:09,946 --> 01:30:11,323 No! That's... 1590 01:30:15,118 --> 01:30:16,335 Howard! 1591 01:30:19,831 --> 01:30:21,833 You're in big trouble now! 1592 01:30:21,917 --> 01:30:24,011 Yeah, shut up! 1593 01:30:28,548 --> 01:30:29,674 Uh... 1594 01:30:38,016 --> 01:30:40,940 Run, Howard! He's in a bad mood! 1595 01:30:44,856 --> 01:30:48,451 Come on! Move! Let's crank her up! 1596 01:30:49,736 --> 01:30:50,737 Hurry! 1597 01:30:50,820 --> 01:30:52,914 Where's that button? It won't start! 1598 01:30:55,325 --> 01:30:57,669 Oh, my God. Ahh! 1599 01:30:59,287 --> 01:31:00,630 Watch out! 1600 01:31:01,206 --> 01:31:02,206 Jump, Howard! 1601 01:31:02,248 --> 01:31:03,295 This is our only chance! 1602 01:31:03,375 --> 01:31:04,422 Get out of there! Duck! 1603 01:31:04,501 --> 01:31:05,878 And proud of it! 1604 01:31:38,326 --> 01:31:40,294 Philsie? You saved my life! 1605 01:31:41,371 --> 01:31:42,839 Are you all right? 1606 01:31:42,914 --> 01:31:44,507 Terrific, Howard. 1607 01:31:44,582 --> 01:31:45,925 It still won't start. 1608 01:31:46,459 --> 01:31:48,211 Try the seatbelt, Howard. 1609 01:31:48,294 --> 01:31:49,591 Seatbelt? 1610 01:31:50,755 --> 01:31:52,052 Whoa! Whoa! 1611 01:31:58,304 --> 01:32:01,524 You little pond-hopper. 1612 01:32:14,571 --> 01:32:16,744 Go, Howard! Go! 1613 01:32:25,248 --> 01:32:27,501 Oh! Talk about bad breath! 1614 01:32:31,337 --> 01:32:33,465 Turbo charge! 1615 01:32:44,434 --> 01:32:46,107 Whoa! 1616 01:32:53,902 --> 01:32:55,529 Now it's my turn. 1617 01:33:15,006 --> 01:33:17,509 Dark Overlord, I want you! 1618 01:33:28,686 --> 01:33:30,688 Prepare to eat beak. 1619 01:33:46,246 --> 01:33:47,589 So long, sucker! 1620 01:33:52,210 --> 01:33:53,382 Howard! 1621 01:34:08,768 --> 01:34:09,815 No! 1622 01:34:15,483 --> 01:34:16,735 Howard? 1623 01:34:21,906 --> 01:34:23,123 Howard? 1624 01:34:26,411 --> 01:34:30,666 On, boy. on... 1625 01:34:30,748 --> 01:34:31,965 Howard. 1626 01:34:38,423 --> 01:34:39,891 Howard! 1627 01:34:39,966 --> 01:34:41,468 You all right? 1628 01:34:42,093 --> 01:34:44,471 I need this like I need another tail. 1629 01:34:44,888 --> 01:34:45,889 You did it! 1630 01:34:45,972 --> 01:34:47,098 Hey, get me down from here! 1631 01:34:47,765 --> 01:34:49,017 Come on! 1632 01:34:50,685 --> 01:34:51,902 Oh! 1633 01:34:54,939 --> 01:34:56,282 Dr. Jenning? 1634 01:34:56,357 --> 01:34:57,825 Howard, it's not... 1635 01:34:57,901 --> 01:34:58,902 It's not what? 1636 01:34:58,985 --> 01:35:00,578 The evil's not inside me anymore. 1637 01:35:00,653 --> 01:35:02,872 The explosion must've released it, and it's loose! 1638 01:35:02,947 --> 01:35:04,039 What about me? 1639 01:35:04,115 --> 01:35:05,583 The Dark Overlord is still here! 1640 01:35:05,658 --> 01:35:09,083 Well, then I suggest we get Beverly and get the hell out of here! 1641 01:35:12,040 --> 01:35:13,640 Philsie, get her down from there! 1642 01:35:15,960 --> 01:35:17,052 What took you so long? 1643 01:35:17,128 --> 01:35:20,007 Oh, nothing. Just got arrested, shot at, handcuffed. 1644 01:35:20,131 --> 01:35:22,571 I got thrown out.-. I was kidnapped, strapped to this table... 1645 01:35:23,968 --> 01:35:26,016 Guys! Guys! 1646 01:35:26,095 --> 01:35:27,347 In a cigarette lighter! 1647 01:35:27,430 --> 01:35:29,182 Cigarette lighter? That's really disgusting! 1648 01:35:29,265 --> 01:35:30,642 - Guys! - What? 1649 01:35:52,914 --> 01:35:54,507 Oh, my God. 1650 01:36:09,472 --> 01:36:11,975 Phil! Phil! Get up! Get up! It's coming! 1651 01:36:12,058 --> 01:36:13,560 It's coming? I was just resting. 1652 01:36:13,643 --> 01:36:14,644 Look! 1653 01:36:15,728 --> 01:36:20,700 There will be no escape! 1654 01:36:38,543 --> 01:36:40,136 Good boy. Stay back! Stay back! 1655 01:36:40,211 --> 01:36:41,713 Oh, boy! Oh! 1656 01:36:43,548 --> 01:36:44,891 Howard! 1657 01:36:45,758 --> 01:36:47,510 There goes Howard! We've got to help Howard! 1658 01:36:47,593 --> 01:36:49,015 Phil! Go! 1659 01:36:49,095 --> 01:36:50,472 We've gotta help Howard! 1660 01:36:56,519 --> 01:37:03,323 Howard! Going somewhere, Howard? 1661 01:37:07,655 --> 01:37:10,829 There's no escape! 1662 01:37:10,908 --> 01:37:14,583 Philsie! Dr. Jenning! Mother! 1663 01:37:24,297 --> 01:37:25,924 Do you wish to activate laser? 1664 01:37:26,007 --> 01:37:27,179 Yes! 1665 01:37:27,592 --> 01:37:28,718 Thank you, Dr. Jenning. 1666 01:37:28,801 --> 01:37:30,348 He started the activation sequence! 1667 01:37:30,428 --> 01:37:32,897 He's gonna bring down more of them! 1668 01:37:32,972 --> 01:37:34,940 You may fire when ready. 1669 01:37:40,521 --> 01:37:42,489 Four minutes to arrival. 1670 01:37:52,408 --> 01:37:55,036 Philsie! Beverly! 1671 01:37:55,119 --> 01:37:57,747 Anybody! Help! 1672 01:37:57,830 --> 01:37:59,924 Three minutes, 20 seconds to arrival. 1673 01:37:59,999 --> 01:38:01,467 Howard! Here! 1674 01:38:03,336 --> 01:38:04,804 All right... 1675 01:38:05,338 --> 01:38:06,840 Sliced salami! 1676 01:38:08,007 --> 01:38:09,133 Yuck! 1677 01:38:13,471 --> 01:38:14,848 Lose something? 1678 01:38:17,892 --> 01:38:20,441 Alien specimens will arrive in laboratory 1679 01:38:20,520 --> 01:38:22,147 in three minutes. 1680 01:38:25,775 --> 01:38:27,903 Howard! 1681 01:38:30,321 --> 01:38:31,664 All right! 1682 01:38:55,388 --> 01:38:57,982 Eat claw, duck! 1683 01:38:59,183 --> 01:39:01,356 Two minutes to arrival. 1684 01:39:01,436 --> 01:39:04,861 Belt. Button. Trigger. 1685 01:39:17,702 --> 01:39:20,046 One minute, 30 seconds to arrival. 1686 01:39:20,121 --> 01:39:23,421 Puny little duck! 1687 01:39:45,062 --> 01:39:46,063 Yeah! 1688 01:39:47,690 --> 01:39:49,567 One minute to arrival. 1689 01:39:49,901 --> 01:39:51,073 Howard! 1690 01:39:54,238 --> 01:39:55,535 There's more coming down. 1691 01:40:00,119 --> 01:40:02,588 The machine, Howard! You gotta destroy it! Blast it! 1692 01:40:02,663 --> 01:40:03,664 Get them! 1693 01:40:04,248 --> 01:40:05,295 No, Howard. Don't! 1694 01:40:05,374 --> 01:40:06,375 Huh? 1695 01:40:06,876 --> 01:40:08,219 You'll never get home. 1696 01:40:08,294 --> 01:40:10,262 30 seconds to arrival. 1697 01:40:10,963 --> 01:40:12,010 Get them! 1698 01:40:19,805 --> 01:40:21,557 Goodbye, Duckworld. 1699 01:40:22,600 --> 01:40:24,602 Get out of there! Run! 1700 01:40:24,727 --> 01:40:27,196 Ten seconds and counting to arrival. 1701 01:40:27,271 --> 01:40:28,318 Over here! 1702 01:40:28,397 --> 01:40:32,618 Nine, eight, seven, six, 1703 01:40:32,693 --> 01:40:38,450 five, four, three, two, one. Arrival. 1704 01:41:14,735 --> 01:41:16,203 Howard! 1705 01:41:28,499 --> 01:41:30,126 Oh, no. 1706 01:41:37,675 --> 01:41:40,019 I don't know where you are now, 1707 01:41:41,554 --> 01:41:43,852 but I hope you're happier there. 1708 01:41:49,020 --> 01:41:51,694 This world didn't treat you very good. 1709 01:41:52,982 --> 01:41:55,360 But you saved it, didn't you? 1710 01:42:03,951 --> 01:42:05,248 Howard! 1711 01:42:07,371 --> 01:42:12,298 I am not Howard anymore. 1712 01:42:20,926 --> 01:42:25,477 Jeez! All this smoke. Murder on the sinuses. 1713 01:42:29,310 --> 01:42:30,357 Fooled you, didn't I? 1714 01:42:33,397 --> 01:42:34,944 Howard. 1715 01:42:35,024 --> 01:42:36,901 It's all right, toots. 1716 01:42:49,789 --> 01:42:50,790 ! right! 1717 01:42:50,873 --> 01:42:54,093 I'd like to dedicate this song to our new manager! 1718 01:42:54,168 --> 01:42:55,511 Uh-huh! 1719 01:43:00,383 --> 01:43:01,384 Go! 1720 01:43:01,467 --> 01:43:03,720 Get that planet on the phone 1721 01:43:06,013 --> 01:43:07,481 ain't no time to waste 1722 01:43:10,476 --> 01:43:13,025 Tell 'em he ain't coming home 1723 01:43:14,772 --> 01:43:16,570 Done joined the human race 1724 01:43:16,649 --> 01:43:19,323 They call him Howard the duck 1725 01:43:19,902 --> 01:43:21,370 No way to conceal it 1726 01:43:21,445 --> 01:43:25,916 With a feathered touch I love him apart 1727 01:43:25,991 --> 01:43:28,710 They call him Howard the duck 1728 01:43:28,786 --> 01:43:30,663 If it ain't funk he don't feel it 1729 01:43:30,746 --> 01:43:34,341 And he shot an arrow straight to my heart 1730 01:43:35,960 --> 01:43:38,713 All right, ready mechanical. We're gonna release the big huevo. 1731 01:43:38,796 --> 01:43:41,140 Cue egg, read!!! Cue egg, go! 1732 01:43:42,299 --> 01:43:43,801 Saved the human race 1733 01:43:43,884 --> 01:43:45,136 They call him Howard the duck 1734 01:43:45,177 --> 01:43:46,895 Howard! Howard! Help me out! 1735 01:43:46,971 --> 01:43:47,972 Release that rope there. 1736 01:43:48,055 --> 01:43:49,307 Gotcha. 1737 01:43:51,517 --> 01:43:52,609 Not that one! 1738 01:43:52,685 --> 01:43:57,236 Whoa! Philsie, what's going on? Get me down from here! 1739 01:43:57,314 --> 01:43:59,737 I've done enough flying, Philsie! 1740 01:43:59,817 --> 01:44:01,615 Stole my heart 1741 01:44:05,531 --> 01:44:06,999 Philsie! 1742 01:44:09,660 --> 01:44:11,580 Do you realize I could have been killed up there? 1743 01:44:16,375 --> 01:44:17,422 What's this? 1744 01:44:17,501 --> 01:44:18,502 Rock 'n' roll! 1745 01:44:20,838 --> 01:44:21,930 Give me four! 1746 01:44:27,720 --> 01:44:29,893 Yeah! 1747 01:44:29,972 --> 01:44:31,474 Beak me, baby! 1748 01:44:33,684 --> 01:44:36,028 Quack! ls that hot enough for you? 1749 01:44:41,192 --> 01:44:43,115 Howard the duck 1750 01:44:43,194 --> 01:44:45,868 If it ain't funk he don't feel it 1751 01:44:48,991 --> 01:44:49,992 Bring it on home! 1752 01:44:50,075 --> 01:44:52,169 He's Howard the duck 1753 01:44:52,244 --> 01:44:54,463 Ain't no way is conceal it 1754 01:44:56,540 --> 01:44:58,713 Bit of Purple Haze for you all! 1755 01:45:01,545 --> 01:45:02,762 Yeah! 1756 01:45:20,105 --> 01:45:21,607 Do it! 1757 01:45:21,690 --> 01:45:24,113 He's called Howard the duck 1758 01:45:24,193 --> 01:45:26,116 If it isn't funk he don't feel it 1759 01:45:26,195 --> 01:45:27,868 Right! Yeah! 1760 01:45:31,116 --> 01:45:32,163 Howard the duck 1761 01:45:32,243 --> 01:45:33,335 That's me! 1762 01:45:33,410 --> 01:45:35,504 Ain't no way is conceal it 1763 01:45:35,579 --> 01:45:39,629 He shot an arrow straight to my heart 1764 01:45:46,257 --> 01:45:48,476 - Thank you! Thank you! - Howard! Howard! Howard! 1765 01:45:48,551 --> 01:45:49,803 We love you! 1766 01:45:50,970 --> 01:45:51,971 Thank you! 1767 01:45:54,223 --> 01:45:55,600 We love you! 1768 01:46:00,604 --> 01:46:02,902 Not bad for a duck from outer space. 1769 01:46:02,982 --> 01:46:05,076 You were great, Ducky. 121343

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